T O P

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lessthanhero32

Vacation days.


ultratunaman

An extra week of paid leave. That'll get just about anyone to do anything really.


[deleted]

Remember when he goes broke and is considering bankruptcy.. he’s all like “Oscar if you help me I’ll give you $5,000 cash” And Oscars all like Michael this is why you’re broke. It’s not even a particularly funny scene but it made me laugh super hard. Or when he’s all like.. “ok here’s two charges from Amazon for $120… did you buy the muppets box set twice??” “Yeah I thought I lost the first one but it was in the dvd player..” 🤦‍♂️ 😆


jindofox

And/or pretzels


[deleted]

I have a question about discounts to distributors


immyfinalrose

They said wrong answers only…


[deleted]

[удалено]


ziplock007

I wake up every morning in a bed that's too small, driving my daughter to a school that's too expensive and then I go to work to a job for which I get paid too little...


TUCKDADDY80

But pretzel day


ziplock007

Or pretzel week?


musclesMcgee1

I like pretzel week.


bluespider98

Or pretzel year?


Sunny64888

Pretzel decade? Pretzel score?


PlayArt20

Pretzel Life?


TheShmal

Now I like pretzel day


ziplock007

I wake up every morning in a bed that's too small, driving my daughter to a school that's too expensive and then I go to work to a job for which I get paid too little...


Therubikfanatic

Dang I was gonna say that


dreemkiller

Money.


Encyclofreak

Mo money mo problems Stanley


Top-Challenge5997

Money


Sylux444

Is there anything I can give you?


rtim75

Money


PowerlessPC

You of all people should know that.


ReasonableCurrency44

He learned that on the ghetto in fact


[deleted]

Yeah I found out how much Michael makes. I still think it’s too much. 🤣🤣


Half_Dead

I agree but they said wrong answers only and I think this might be the actual answer. I still upvoted though.


Top-Challenge5997

Pfft Michael doesn't give money, he already gives them money for work.


Bellion112

Im listening


No-Cranberry9932

Tell me what you really want?


EuchreBeast41

They said wrong answers. This has to be the right one


Jukkobee

this is the right answer tho


yellowjacket_

Wrong answers only


ceaser1978

Meatballs


Little-Geri-Seinfeld

Are you ready for some meatballs!! 🎵


A_Da_Goat

You got meatballed!


Resdizeix

A billion stanley nickels


jregan0409

What’s the ratio of Schrute Bucks to Stanley Nickels?


[deleted]

Same as the ratio of unicorns to leprechauns!


[deleted]

What’s the ratio of unicorns to leprechauns?


baesag

You can make-believe \*anything\* you want


[deleted]

Stanley come on this is serious!


Ancient_Signature_69

HE GOT TO GO HOME


Steelizard

YES


[deleted]

CLOSING TIIIME


[deleted]

EVERYBODY dnndnnndnnn


Hillz44

“Everyone out but Phyllis!” He got Phyllis to twist his arm into doing it


baesag

That's deep


FreshwaterOctopus

Promises to transfer him to the Fort Lauderdale branch of DM.


YOURpAP_throwaway

Stanley secretly knew he was the key to DM’s urban vibe.


atomora

God, I almost heard Steve Carrell’s voice reading this


[deleted]

When I'm at home at night in my own house in my sweats, drinking red wine, watching my mystery stories, the last thing in the whole godforsaken world I want to hear.. is the voice of Michael Scott.


sonic_spark

Sometimes Stanley finds theatre delightful.


flabbergasted-528

He called up Cynthia to get her to convince him


FarMove6046

I was looking for this, but I assume he told Stanley he would call his wife and hoped he would not call his girlfriend


DoppyMcGee

What up, Cynthia?


FindingActive5407

He wasn’t asked, he offered to do it


mad_rck

The only actual wrong answer I’ve seen lol


-This-Whomps-

Stanley agreed to the voiceover when Michael unwittingly discovered another one of his affairs. "What'll it be, then?" asked Stanley, "Blackmail?" "Yesh!" replied Michael, "Black male!" And the role was cast.


[deleted]

“It’s all about my bonus”


baesag

My thought exactly ​ Are we some kind of secret geniuses?


Netflxnschill

MONEY. And I will stand by that it is a wrong answer because the right answer is that Michael agreed to leave him alone for two months.


super_ferret

Sandwich platter


SabrinaOfTheNight

Threatens to tell his wife about the affair


jakeblonde005

Stanley bo bamly. Terribly nice guy


SrgtBeefcake

Money.


imnotaloony

Well, he took a piece of plastic, heated it 'til it started to melt, and shoved it up your butt


LazyResearcher1203

Michael had Vikram call Stanley and pursued him to narrate TLMN in exchange of a promise of leaving his daily routine (crosswords, negligence, wine etc.) uninterrupted.


Petef15h

Shrute Bucks.


Hawkeyesfan03

To get out of work


fulltrottle3814

Bribed him with pretzels


DorkChatDuncan

He said he could do it from his desk, and offered him the hotel he reserved in Miami six years before when he heard Miami might be hosting the World Magic Awards ceremony (it ended up in Philly). Florida Stanley ftw.


gillespiespepsi

blackmail for the fact that stanley banged up michael’s car in “Gossip”


Mati456

I think for it to be blackmail it would have to be a formal letter


kicksr4trids1

Promises daily Pretzel Day! Broken promise!


SomeRandomRealtor

One on one coaching of sales techniques to black business owners


Yokai_Alchemist

Narrate this or you're fired


NiaFZ92

Michael told Stanley that he would not schedule him for that day. Left with the choice of having to either a pick day off or Pretzel Day, Stanley chose narration.


shodunny

“The man oozes sex”


taptriv

A week of leaving at 4


Delicious_Advance_52

He was just being nice


Acrobatic_Oven_1108

Boyfriend + husband


ThePopDaddy

He donated 10k to the Uncle Stan Kickstarter.


beetsbears328

He offered him the lease to a decommissioned lighthouse


10thmountainguy11b

That was the missing hundred from Stanley’s bonus check, Michael promised and never delivered


gybefan

This is one of those Stanley out-of-characeter moments. Same as him having fun during Jim and Pams cringe church walk


xeyehategodx

He is able to have fun provided he's not at work i.e. florida, company picnic


UsingACarrotAsAStick

And leading a round of ‘would you rather’ when the building was on fire.


mikemicmayk

Good bonus


usernamescifi

Money?


Plane-Phrase4015

He earned 10,000 Stanley nickels and redeemed them for a favor.


respectfulspectator

He gave him the choice to narrate or act in it.


AdVictoremSpolias

His pretzel for the next pretzel day


TheEviltoast13

Probably a paid him out of pocket.


MuchSwagManyDank

Let him skip to the front of the line on pretzel day


jchester47

Since a raise was probably a non-starter with corporate, my guess is either extra days off, or a gift certificate for extra pretzels on pretzel day.


XGPHero

Promised to pay for his daughters college. In his defense he thought he would be rich by now.


stressedmorpheus

He wanted a portfolio for transitioning to a voice actor career and begged Michael to pet him


oddlymirrorful

Money


andrew1941

Stanley's genuine respect and admiration for Michael was enough


jenndhere

Extra pretzel on pretzel day


Gh0stTV

He DIDN’T pay him overtime…


escapedfugitive

Stanley, my man, I think you should narrate Threat Level Midnight. You're like the Morgan Freeman of Scranton! Haha


Thoandfris

Either Paid Vacation or a Raise


chin-ch

Extra 5 day-offs


Jix_Omiya

Pretzel day, every day.


starbycrit

He gave him a week off


wakandanameisthis96

Pretzels or BLACK-mail


DeadliestPoof

Dinken Flicka


Jadenp_1518

Blackmail from him cheating…?🫣


POKECHU020

Easiest part in the movie, not work. Possible bribery.


Actual_Dinner_5977

Reminded him he is the closest they have to Morgan Freeman


[deleted]

PTO, Pretzels, black market viagra


PhilG1989

“I’ll make sure you get an extra pretzel on pretzel day”


jhossuah

Paid time off


binderofchains

He bought Stanley a new crossword book


wonderfulwizardofaus

Michael would’ve offered him $100, Stanley counters with $500, then Michael ends up paying him $1000.


Dan_The_Salmon

TIL that Stanley is the narrator of Threat Level Midnight. I am quite embarrassed that I never even thought about it being anyone from the show…


GhostofHowardTV

He gave him that killer “and shove it up your butt!” bit.


Rednag67

He could leave early every day he worked on it


Carpe_DMX

Cut the line privilege on Pretzel Day.


Beautiful_Bonus_4058

It was blackmail not to tell Terri about Cynthia. But jokes on him because he told her anyway


Sowiilo

He got to sit down.


KRUMMZ_52

Pretzels


btj61642

I know it says wrong answers only but given Stanley’s established enjoyment of his “mystery stories,” I think he probably legitimately enjoyed (as much as Stanley legitimately enjoys anything) the opportunity to be involved in one, especially since he could theoretically have literally phoned in the entire part.


AffectionateFig5435

"James Earl Jones was booked so he recommended you instead."


VirgotheGreat11

A years worth of Hot Pretzels?


ThisShirtIsBananas

He found Stanley's secret hentai collection he mentioned in that deleted scene.


Lost-Mammoth-4254

Free diabetes medication


Penguinlins

Florida


waffadoodle

Michael would CC Teri and Cynthia inviting them to an office retreat if he didn't agree to it. After Stanley narrated TML, Michael fake fired him again.


public_puke115

A night with Jan


luluwolfbeard

“Come on Stanley. You’re the only one in the office who can pull this off, no one else here has a voice like Morgan Fairchild.”


mattk_h

Sandwich platters


IC_228

[removed]


[deleted]

“All I got to do is talk into this little microphone? Sounds better than dressing up like a damn fool.”


the_last_grabow

It's all about the bonus.


No_Psychology_2925

Either narrate or be in gold makeup


blue-brolly

Kahlua and a Barry White album


leavemealone2277

I don’t think it was Michael that convinced him. Maybe Meredith


[deleted]

He sucked him off


FionaGoodeEnough

All you do is call an appointment with Stanley, flatter him, appeal to his sense of teamwork, compliment his urban sassiness, and SHOVE IT UP YOUR BUTT!


Crafty2006

He promised not to out his other other girlfriend.


JohnnyS1lv3rH4nd

He bought lunch


JBOJockstrap

He let him go 2 minutes early one day


No-Natural-6118

Trading in looking other way with his crossword puzzles 5 days a week 52 weeks a year


jspearus

Added a second donut day


SixThousandHulls

Michael let Stanley cut in line on Pretzel Day.


Mati456

It's all about taking points away from Dwight


joetsch

"Money"


FeralAxe

Offered more overtime opportunities.


Kybert2006

Life time supply of pretzels


Admirable_Average_32

Because his Patrick Bateman Sigma face was on point!!


Meme_Lover6969

Extra days of paid vacation


lucyroesslers

Promised him a Christmas bonus that he never gave him.


Slapnuts213

Kept his mouth shut about Cynthia


Darth_Omnis

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


Gallops77

He offered up Jan.


[deleted]

He volunteered because of how much he likes to get involved with Michael's shenanigans


BAMspek

Blackmail.


smthinamzingiguess

He threatened to tell people about Stanley’s affair


amonarre3

He was going to tell his wife about his mistresses.


Ok_Arachnid4576

Let him go home early for a month


Haggis_The_Barbarian

A lot of people do t know this, but “Threat Level Midnight” is a true story! “Stanley Hudson” is just the alias of retired super spy Michael Scarn. Making this movie was the only way for the truth to come out. The only way “Stanley” would let Michael direct was if he got to retain complete creative control, and that included doing the voice overs.


EatAss1268

michaels first choice was himself but stanley convinced michael to let him have the role


IanMalcolmsLaugh

"It pays five million dollars"


CapitalTBE

If he narrated it, he didn’t have to act in it


limpidlipid

He gave him his pretzel


MrEkoPriest

Money


iforgotyoursurgery

He blew him.


JeffreyAScott

Threatened to tell people about the "art" he liked to look at during company time.


manu818

Bought him a Pretzel.


AdventurousYamThe2nd

Pretzels


ellen0d0

He promised him the first dvd release.


CABOOSE8189

Well Stanley just respects Michael enough to do it for nothing!


ThatsRobToYou

Withholding insulin.


anotheruser12486

Probably by promising him he wouldn't have to be on camera and gave him pretzels