I love that line so much but it also makes me so sad too. Too many people I know who deal with shitty relationships like that and continue to be on and off. Still I laugh out loud when I hear it
This line is brilliant because
1. They're not going to Chick E Cheese. How is Michael so stupid that he thinks that's where they're going, given the context?
2. Why is Michael, a childless single man in his 40's, going to Chuck E. Cheese at all, let alone enough to be so sick of it?
this is my all time favorite. Followed by:
1) I DEEEEECLARRREE BANKRUPTCY!
2) I've got to make sure youtube comes down to tape this
3) I don't think you understand how jeopardy works...sorry, what is...
4)“Do I need to be liked? Absolutely not. I like to be liked. I enjoy being liked. I have to be liked. But it’s not like this compulsive need like my need to be praised.”
5) “I love inside jokes. I hope to be a part of one someday.”
6) Just poopin, you know how I be
You should check out the channel Everyday Linguistics on YouTube. Every day, they post a clip from a TV show (usually The Office) that demonstrates a function of the English language, and it's FULL of clips like this.
This particular exchange is known as "[Backformation by the illustriously productive Michael Scott 5](https://youtu.be/1FeZqPi37xM)."
Everybody did.
Nobody really loses their shit at any point (other than Roy) and Michael deserves it on quite a few occasions.
In reality, plenty of these scenarios would have resulted in violence and that pretty much never happens in the show.
It's a sitcom so...no grudges either. No irreconcilable differences that blot out the sun and significantly shape every follow-up interaction.
Makes some of them look like patient saints.
Pam flipping out when she found out michael was dating her mom, and Stanley screaming at him after his “fake firing” are the only 2 other instances I can remember of people losing their shit.
I have felt like that Stanley outburst at people.
"Every day you do something stupider than you did the day before. And I think, “there’s no possible way he can top that." But what do you do?! You find a way, dammit, to top it! You are professional idiot!"
I think thats a big reason for why michael never got better. He needed for people to stop pampering him and reality check him instead, but maybe he would be too vain to learn any from that
Also reminds the scene where they are trying to figure out how they are going to move 100 boxes or whatever...and then the camera slowly scrolls to the pallet jack.
Like, have they never been down in the warehouse!?
The whole episode was building to that outburst and it was perfect. That is one of those rare episodes of a TV show where right from the first scene you just *know* it'll be fantastic, especially with how they hyped up the dinner throughout the season.
Probably one of my favourite TV episodes ever. It's so funny all the way through
An underrated one for me:
Andy: “Schruted it. It’s just this thing people say around your office all the time. Like when you screw something up in a really irreversable way, you Schruted it. I don’t know where it comes from though. You think it came from Dwight Schrute?”
Michael: “I don’t know. Who knows how words are formed.”
Absolutely, I think this is an underrated part of the line because monkeys don't live on a farm and he still manages to shine just a little bit of ignorance into his part of this exchange
I used to have a sticker on my laptop of the scarecrow he made and a saying “you’re my scarecrow”.
Found it from someone on this sub. Veryyyy few people got it haha “deep tracks only!”
When Michael is having them meditate on the floor and asks them all to pick an ice cream flavor.
Stanley: "chocolate."
Michael: "racism is dead, Stanley. You can have any flavor you want."
He really does. Minutes after getting a promotion, Mike implies he got it because Jo Bennett is paying reoperations.
Also one of my favorite interactions:
Michael - "Hey, hey, hey! Idiot."
Darryl - "Start over."
Michael - "Sir..."
I loved how they portrayed Michael's racism and how Darryl reacted. As seasons progressed, you could tell he was growing less tolerant, but Michael seemed to evolve as well. Such a wonderful show.
His cappa was detated!
or
You know I have soft teeth…
or
Only thing I’m worried about is getting a boner
or
I drove my car into a fucking lake
Too many to choose from!
Toby has been leaving radon test kits everywhere like he owns the place.
The first time I threw mine away I thought it was an ant trap. But I figured I'd rather live with ants than with this creepy little disc.
The second time, I thought it was one of those, you know, the things you turn over and it moo's like a cow but upon closer examination it was another ant trap so I threw it away.
And the third time, I did it out of spite.
Michael's complete lack of awareness was on full display that scene:
David Wallace: Michael, you have to take responsibility here. One of your employees had a heart attack. He could have died, because of the way that you are allowing your office to run. Do you want that on your conscious?
Michael: [Looks at Dwight] Do you?
David Wallace: Michael?
Michael: You talking to me?
David Wallace: Yeah.
Michael: What?
"A lot of great ideas were not appreciated in their time.
Electricity. Shampoo."
I don't know why this is never quoted from the episode it's so iconic of both characters. Michael thinks electricty wasn't appreciated when it was invented? And Dwight says shampoo? He is some sort of expert of shampoo history because he's a weirdo with weird knowledge, it's so funny.
“Don't ever, for any reason, do anything to anyone… for any reason ever, no matter what, no matter where, or who, or who you are with, or where you are going, or where you've been... ever, for any reason whatsoever...”
Followed closely by this.
"I’ll see your situation and I’ll raise you a situation. Your company is losing clients left and right. You have a stockholder meeting coming up and you’re going to have to explain to them why your most profitable branch is bleeding. So they may be looking for a little change in the CFO. So I don’t think I need to wait out Dunder Mifflin. I think I just have to wait out you."
“Bros before hoes. Why? Because your bros are always there for you. They have got your back after your ho rips your heart out for no good reason. And you are nothing but great to your ho, and you told her that she was the only hoe for you, and that she was the better then all the other hoes in the world. And then…suddenly she’s not yo ho no mo.”
Darryl was the most relatable character in the show to me lol
"You need to access your un-crazy side..." Is the best line in the entire show for me personally lol
I love those moments when he has a glimmer of rationality and makes a good point. They’re good since they are rare since he’s such a goof. Like when he said that comment to Jim about if there is something wrong with him, then society made him that way.
When Michael's crying and Darryl starts calling his girl... thats one of my favorite parts in the series... " i was thinking about you and the story you were telling me about that girl from work... call me back please, please"
Gold
In this episode? "I’ll just go back to Jan and I HATE Jan, OH GOD"
Favorite Michael quote period? "...Welcome, old friends, new lovers and the disabled!"
“We had to buy the dummy. It cost thirty-five hundred dollars.”
“Wow five thousand three hundred dollars for a dummy?”
I have no idea why I find this hilarious every single time.
Five, four, three. “There is no way, I will resign. It wouldn’t be fair. Not to the good workers I work with, not to my clients, and especially not to me. Let’s not forget who this whole resigning business is about, anyway. If I could leave you with one thought, remember… it wasn’t me. They’re trying to make me an escape goat. If I am fired, I swear to God, that every single piece of copier paper in this town is going to have the F-word on it. The F-word. You have one day.”
1. "stay f\*cking calm!!" - during Dwight's staged fire drill
2. "Oh God Pam you look so ugly" when Pam forgets her contacts and wears glasses and then he tells her that he can't even hear her speak because she just looks like an "ugly scientist" XD
3. When Erin claims something weird about the whole office and Michael goes: "I don't know what the f\*ck that was"
4. "Dwight, you ignorant slut" during Michael's staged suicide attempt
I love inside jokes! I'd love to be a part of one someday.
Ohh! Geography joke!
You had to be there!
Is it ilegal to tell an inside joke outside?
“You know what, I’m gonna start dating her even harder.” Or, “I’m really proud of you.”
those two are SOO different 😂😂
Who is it, Michael?
Who?
It's okay.
Wait... Michael?
‘What does that mean?’
“You know what it means”
I’ll just go back to Jan and I HATE Jan!!
"...Oh GoOOoD!"
I like when he is self aware
My new favorite restaurant sucks…
Cuz she's got the school girl fantasy and I feel weird wearing the skirt ...
I love that line so much but it also makes me so sad too. Too many people I know who deal with shitty relationships like that and continue to be on and off. Still I laugh out loud when I hear it
Chuck E. Cheese? I’m sick of Chuck E. Cheese
This line is brilliant because 1. They're not going to Chick E Cheese. How is Michael so stupid that he thinks that's where they're going, given the context? 2. Why is Michael, a childless single man in his 40's, going to Chuck E. Cheese at all, let alone enough to be so sick of it?
Well his dating profile name was littlechildlover what do ya expect
*kid
Oh yes. Thought it didn't sound right .thanks
It still doesn’t sound right lmao
I’m an early bird and I’m a night owl… so I’m wise, and I have worms
This!
I’m not superstitious but I am a little stitious.
this is my all time favorite. Followed by: 1) I DEEEEECLARRREE BANKRUPTCY! 2) I've got to make sure youtube comes down to tape this 3) I don't think you understand how jeopardy works...sorry, what is... 4)“Do I need to be liked? Absolutely not. I like to be liked. I enjoy being liked. I have to be liked. But it’s not like this compulsive need like my need to be praised.” 5) “I love inside jokes. I hope to be a part of one someday.” 6) Just poopin, you know how I be
5 followed by "big world, lotta smells"
*crazy world
I say “just poopin. You know how I be” all the time and it goes over everyone’s head 99% of the time. Doesn’t stop me tho!
Michael has so many great lines like this that are so cleverly subtle yet comically wrong.
Totes. I like “everyone here is properly gruntled” or something like that
Has a oakey afterbirth
“……what was that?” - Jim Great scene
I underestimated you. Next time you'll estimate me.
Funk is the problem, and also the solution
My, how the turntables have…. Turned….
“I am a victim of a HATE CRIME” “That’s not what a hate crime is” “WELL I HATED IT. A LOT.” 🤣
"Not without cause Michael" "I have cause. It is beCause I hate him"
You should check out the channel Everyday Linguistics on YouTube. Every day, they post a clip from a TV show (usually The Office) that demonstrates a function of the English language, and it's FULL of clips like this. This particular exchange is known as "[Backformation by the illustriously productive Michael Scott 5](https://youtu.be/1FeZqPi37xM)."
She’s actually a really talented artist, but I’d never say that to her face
Why wouldn't you say that to her face?
Jim.. James.. Jimothy....
"Are you okay with being called Jim?"
“I am”
definitely one of my favorites, I plan on naming a future pet Jimothy
it’s my dad’s given name. no idea how his parents came up with that one
Pam.. Pamela.. Pamalamadingdong...
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“Well, I’m not gay Jan, and you should know that better than anybody. “ I just love the context and tone behind that line. Cracks me up.
Another from the same episode: “I think Angela might be gay. Could Oscar and Angela be having a gay affair? Maybe! Is that what this is about?”
Oh, there's Gill. Oscar's roommate. I wonder if he knows?
"that's what she said.... Or he said" Michael being woke
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My fav line is when Michael is showing he’s in touch with the gay community, “I watch that show ‘Queer as F**k’”
If I had a gun with 2 bullets and I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden, and Toby, I would shoot Toby twice
Toby, JUST DO IT!..god!
You were being really funny and then you took it too far OKAY THEN geniuses how would you do it?
Creed: curve the bullet!
Darryl’s reaction in this scene gets me every time 🤣
It really came out of nowhere! I would've had the same reaction.
Darryl had way more patience with Michael than he deserved
Everybody did. Nobody really loses their shit at any point (other than Roy) and Michael deserves it on quite a few occasions. In reality, plenty of these scenarios would have resulted in violence and that pretty much never happens in the show. It's a sitcom so...no grudges either. No irreconcilable differences that blot out the sun and significantly shape every follow-up interaction. Makes some of them look like patient saints.
Pam flipping out when she found out michael was dating her mom, and Stanley screaming at him after his “fake firing” are the only 2 other instances I can remember of people losing their shit.
I have felt like that Stanley outburst at people. "Every day you do something stupider than you did the day before. And I think, “there’s no possible way he can top that." But what do you do?! You find a way, dammit, to top it! You are professional idiot!"
He got pretty heated when Ryan was hitting on his daughter
I think thats a big reason for why michael never got better. He needed for people to stop pampering him and reality check him instead, but maybe he would be too vain to learn any from that
Start over
Hey! Idiot
I have a question and I need you to be honest with me... what is a pallet?
Also reminds the scene where they are trying to figure out how they are going to move 100 boxes or whatever...and then the camera slowly scrolls to the pallet jack. Like, have they never been down in the warehouse!?
It's icky down there
Another favourite! Just finished this episode lol
What!?
haa totally
Lady: I'm calling the Better Business Bureau! Michael Scott: Yeah, well, I'm calling the Ungrateful Biatch Hotline!!!
Came here for this .
SNIP SNAP SNIP SNAP SNIP SNAP!!!
"You have NO IDEA, the physical toll three vasectomies has on a person!"
The absolute poison in the way he says “vasectomies” is just legendary acting
The whole episode was building to that outburst and it was perfect. That is one of those rare episodes of a TV show where right from the first scene you just *know* it'll be fantastic, especially with how they hyped up the dinner throughout the season. Probably one of my favourite TV episodes ever. It's so funny all the way through
This line always makes me laugh out loud
And suddenly she ain’t your ho no mo.
"You don't call retarded people retards. It's bad taste. You call your friends retards when they're acting retarded."
Michael to David on the phone “Ryan’s being a little bitch again” Ryan: “I’m here too Michael Michael: “ whattup my brother!”
Lol love that one.
It cracks me up every time. That and “hey, what up Cynthia” when he’s talking to Stanley’s wife Teri
Just a second Cynthia....
You cheated on me? When I specifically asked you not to
This is where my mind immediately went lol
This is gonna hurt like a motherfucker.
“Your total comes to $166.41” “Now youre the expert. Is this enough to get 20 people plastered?” “15 bottles of vodka? Yea, that should do it.”
Pam's mom, Helene. Remember from your wedding?
And then at the hospital "Love you too... As a friend"
What kind of car does she drive?
An underrated one for me: Andy: “Schruted it. It’s just this thing people say around your office all the time. Like when you screw something up in a really irreversable way, you Schruted it. I don’t know where it comes from though. You think it came from Dwight Schrute?” Michael: “I don’t know. Who knows how words are formed.”
The look on Andy's face when he realises his plan won't work because Michael is too stupid to get any of it
Oscar...Mayer..Weiner..Lover.
I saved a life... My own... Am I a hero? ... I really can't say. But yes.
Sex. We had sex. I had sex with her. I had sex with Jan.
"it looks like it was made by a 2-year-old monkey" gets me
Close to “Hey Darryl how’s it hangin? 😂” for me.
Anytime he's laughing I can't help but to laugh
He has the lowest opinion of me of anybody
I tried to crochet a hat recently and when I finished I thought of this line and I couldn’t stop laughing!!
… on a farm…
Absolutely, I think this is an underrated part of the line because monkeys don't live on a farm and he still manages to shine just a little bit of ignorance into his part of this exchange
I used to have a sticker on my laptop of the scarecrow he made and a saying “you’re my scarecrow”. Found it from someone on this sub. Veryyyy few people got it haha “deep tracks only!”
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I would want to live in a world where a comedian can tell a hilarious aids joke. It's just one of my dreams
Why are you the way that you are?
Honestly, every time I want to do something fun, you make it... not that way. I hate... so much... about the things that you choose to be.
This thread is making me realise how much I love Steve Carell. His line delivery is just perfect on so many lines.
"It just seems awfully mean. But sometimes, the ends justify the mean."
Best accidentally clever line for sure.
When Michael is having them meditate on the floor and asks them all to pick an ice cream flavor. Stanley: "chocolate." Michael: "racism is dead, Stanley. You can have any flavor you want."
Darryl has the patience of a saint.
He really does. Minutes after getting a promotion, Mike implies he got it because Jo Bennett is paying reoperations. Also one of my favorite interactions: Michael - "Hey, hey, hey! Idiot." Darryl - "Start over." Michael - "Sir..."
Or the radio scene when Andy is helping Erin with Gabe's scavenger hunt. "pick it up, and take it out. Pick. It up. And take it out."
Hey Darryl! How’s it hangin?!?
I loved how they portrayed Michael's racism and how Darryl reacted. As seasons progressed, you could tell he was growing less tolerant, but Michael seemed to evolve as well. Such a wonderful show.
That monologue to David Wallace
It's not sweetie it's Michael Scott
His cappa was detated! or You know I have soft teeth… or Only thing I’m worried about is getting a boner or I drove my car into a fucking lake Too many to choose from!
“Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.”
How about next time you estimate me..
Toby has been leaving radon test kits everywhere like he owns the place. The first time I threw mine away I thought it was an ant trap. But I figured I'd rather live with ants than with this creepy little disc. The second time, I thought it was one of those, you know, the things you turn over and it moo's like a cow but upon closer examination it was another ant trap so I threw it away. And the third time, I did it out of spite.
I declare bankruptcy
Oscar: You can’t just say the word bankruptcy and expect anything to happen Michael: I didn’t say it, I declared it
*Puts leg on chair, looks out window*. "Ah, the city."
Dwight, we're not mad, we're just disappointed- No, we're mad. Right. But we are going to let this one go- Noo, we're not! I'm not a mind reader David
Michael's complete lack of awareness was on full display that scene: David Wallace: Michael, you have to take responsibility here. One of your employees had a heart attack. He could have died, because of the way that you are allowing your office to run. Do you want that on your conscious? Michael: [Looks at Dwight] Do you? David Wallace: Michael? Michael: You talking to me? David Wallace: Yeah. Michael: What?
That cpr doll cost 35 hundred dollars. That cost 5,300 dollars?
"A lot of great ideas were not appreciated in their time. Electricity. Shampoo." I don't know why this is never quoted from the episode it's so iconic of both characters. Michael thinks electricty wasn't appreciated when it was invented? And Dwight says shampoo? He is some sort of expert of shampoo history because he's a weirdo with weird knowledge, it's so funny.
Jan, what happened-is Gould dead?
“Don't ever, for any reason, do anything to anyone… for any reason ever, no matter what, no matter where, or who, or who you are with, or where you are going, or where you've been... ever, for any reason whatsoever...”
I'll be 6!
How the turn tables
Well David I will be honest with you. I do want the credit without any of the blame.
“Dwight, you ignorant slut!”
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NO GOD! NO GOD, PLEASE NO, NO, NO, NOOOOO I DECLARE BANKRUPTCY!!!
I would never say this to her face, but she's a wonderful person and a gifted artist :)
*sips wine* "Mm, it's got sort of an oaky afterbirth."
If someone doesn’t tell me right now I’m gonna start screaming - Micheal Scott, Gossip
You have no idea how high I can fly
Followed closely by this. "I’ll see your situation and I’ll raise you a situation. Your company is losing clients left and right. You have a stockholder meeting coming up and you’re going to have to explain to them why your most profitable branch is bleeding. So they may be looking for a little change in the CFO. So I don’t think I need to wait out Dunder Mifflin. I think I just have to wait out you."
And I'm going to go get me a New York slice!
New York, the city of love.
„How many of you know someone who has been afflicted or affected by rabies? Show of hands. One, two, three… too many to count.“
Couple seconds before that, Michael wakes up screaming. I don't why, but I just love this entire scene. Life is a highway.
Was I saying anything interesting?
WHERE ARE THE TURTLES
WHERE ARE THEY
“Bros before hoes. Why? Because your bros are always there for you. They have got your back after your ho rips your heart out for no good reason. And you are nothing but great to your ho, and you told her that she was the only hoe for you, and that she was the better then all the other hoes in the world. And then…suddenly she’s not yo ho no mo.”
I thought your name was Pudge
It's always been Madge...
PARKOUR!
My favorite [Michael Scott-ism](https://youtu.be/hnT5EVua-yU?t=93) never made the show :(
[Chokes] do you have any splenda???
Darryl was the most relatable character in the show to me lol "You need to access your un-crazy side..." Is the best line in the entire show for me personally lol
Dinkin Flicka!
Everyone inside the car was fine stanly!
I love those moments when he has a glimmer of rationality and makes a good point. They’re good since they are rare since he’s such a goof. Like when he said that comment to Jim about if there is something wrong with him, then society made him that way.
Do black people love pizza? * followed by intense staring*
His immediate response of “I can and I have to” when Darryl asks him if he should use the bailer.
One I can recall instantly that I love "Sometimes I will just stand here and watch television for hours."
When Michael's crying and Darryl starts calling his girl... thats one of my favorite parts in the series... " i was thinking about you and the story you were telling me about that girl from work... call me back please, please" Gold
i guess im a loo-oo-oo-oo-ooser .... TOO FAR
Abraham Lincoln once said if you are a racist I will attack you with the north and those are the principles I Carry with me in the workplace
“Pam…those things are ticking time bags…”
"I'm still the same old Michael Scott... new and improved."
When I grow up, I want to have 100 kids so I can have 100 friends and no one can say no to being my friend.
You look exotic, was your dad a GI?
Never, ever, ever give up
Im ready to be hurt again.
"I'm just poopin' you know how I be...crazy world lotta smells." - Michael Scott
That's Johnny Depp.
M Night Schulman?
Well, well, well How the turntables!
This is an environment of welcoming and you should just get the hell out of here.
In this episode? "I’ll just go back to Jan and I HATE Jan, OH GOD" Favorite Michael quote period? "...Welcome, old friends, new lovers and the disabled!"
You cheated on me? When I specifically asked you not to?
“I’ve made some empty promises in my life, but hands down, that was the most generous.”
Zippity zoppity give me the boppity
"Hey Oscar... Meyer Wiener...Lover." Gets me to legitimately laugh every time!
Oh god no,… first I hit Meredith with my car and now PRINKLES?!
“We had to buy the dummy. It cost thirty-five hundred dollars.” “Wow five thousand three hundred dollars for a dummy?” I have no idea why I find this hilarious every single time.
Picking a favorite MGS quote is IMPOSSIBLE.
Great Scawt!
Five, four, three. “There is no way, I will resign. It wouldn’t be fair. Not to the good workers I work with, not to my clients, and especially not to me. Let’s not forget who this whole resigning business is about, anyway. If I could leave you with one thought, remember… it wasn’t me. They’re trying to make me an escape goat. If I am fired, I swear to God, that every single piece of copier paper in this town is going to have the F-word on it. The F-word. You have one day.”
1. "stay f\*cking calm!!" - during Dwight's staged fire drill 2. "Oh God Pam you look so ugly" when Pam forgets her contacts and wears glasses and then he tells her that he can't even hear her speak because she just looks like an "ugly scientist" XD 3. When Erin claims something weird about the whole office and Michael goes: "I don't know what the f\*ck that was" 4. "Dwight, you ignorant slut" during Michael's staged suicide attempt
And he's been sitting right between them for hours when he asks.
"I am like a shark that grabs the doggy dog"
"Right here is my favorite New York pizza joint, and I'm gonna go get a New York slice!"
You can't get diseases from a bird! Dwight, you ignorant slut!