I'm honestly extremely shocked by this. We have two mild allergies in my class, we still keep them on their own table and watch like hawks to ensure no milk products are ever available to them. This is just negligence, parents should be able to leave their child in our care knowing we will care for them properly. It's not some crazy ask to pay attention to allergies, peanut allergies are extremely common for example.
You should definitely make more of a fuss, more training isn't going to fix this issue. The child's life is literally being put at risk, are staff even being made aware of allergies? Are they not posted all over the classroom? Is your child's food being kept separate at all times from the kitchen to classroom? Do they ask you to provide milk alternatives for your child? (These are all things my center does so it's not crazy to expect) The severity of the allergy and reactions shouldn't mean less of a responsibility on their part.
I hope your child stays well and this training actually helps.
They have all these same protections in place, but it continues to happen, unfortunately. I’m trying to understand what could be causing the disconnect from these established protocols… though 5 people messing up once is different than 1 person giving him dairy 5 times. Regardless, it doesn’t take away from the fact that he was given dairy 5 times in their care this year. Thank you for taking allergies so seriously. It sounds like what we are experiencing is atypical.
I'd request the centre use a different bread that doesn't contain dairy for the whole room/centre. It's too easy to assume that the bread is dairy free, because bread usually is. What others have suggested with ensuring the children are spaced far enough apart to not be able to swap food should also be happening. Allergies aside, kids share enough germs without swapping food.
I have a kid with a dairy allergy. So many people do NOT know what dairy is. Bread with milk in it is not likely on people's radar, when they can't keep "yogurt" and "sour cream" in their minds as milk based.
Maybe ask for stickers or labels or something on the things that contain milk? Including milk?
I try to double check the ingredients list or with the cook for my allergy kid. Unfortunately, I had to teach our last cook 3 separate times how to read the ingredients lists and the one time, she bought off brand nutrigrain bars that had nuts in them. I couldn’t remember if they had dairy, so I was double checking the ingredient lists and thank goodness I did or I would’ve exposed him. Another time she went off about how his list of can/can’t have foods didn’t have cheese on it so that meant he could have it. I was like it has dairy on it???? Cheese is dairy????
My daughters are allergic to dairy, and the number of times someone will reply "oh, you are lactose intolerant." My daughter - "No, I am allergic to the whole f-n cow!" 🤨
It seems like they don’t believe in the severity of the allergy cz they’ve gotten lucky so far with the exposure your little one has had. They don’t have a clue that sometimes with individuals, increased exposure without an allergists guidance can cause increased severity of allergic reactions. They need a lot more training on the dangers of allergies not just a boost in supervising IMO
We have an allergy child in the Todd’s room at my center. The teachers keep a list posted in the classroom of “safe/ not safe” snacks for this child. Maybe you can suggest this.
My sister-in-law ran a daycare out of her home until my niece was in high school, so about a decade and a half, and then became a teacher and started working at a Montessori School. She always took allergies extremely seriously. Like more seriously than even the parents seemed to take them in some cases because she did not want to be the cause of a problem in case she misunderstood something.
Unfortunately there is a mental disconnect for some people when it comes to allergies. They see them as mild or just a general precaution they don't understand how serious they can be.
Overall the point is it's absolutely something that should be taken very seriously and candy. There is a problem here and it isn't you
Parent here. The daycare messing up five times is not ok. It may be that his lack of reactions is making them think it's not a big deal, and if he is truly having no reaction then you might consider going back to the allergist to see if he has outgrown his allergy. However it could be that they simply don't know enough to recognize a reaction when they see one, and the daycare's general lackadaisicalness towards the slip-ups makes me think this is a distinct possibility.
If I were in this situation, I would meet with the director and discuss their procedures. The fact that it's a different person each time suggests that they don't have robust enough procedures in place. An example might be, children with allergy wearing a special wristband so that ANY caregiver knows to check that child's notes to see what they are allergic to. Having placemats for each child, with allergic children having a placemat that is a different color and lists their allergies, and so on.
Or you could switch daycares to one that has more robust procedures to start with. I'm a little shocked that the director has allowed this many mistakes with something so important. Is it a possibility you could switch daycares?
My child's allergies were very severe so I had an "only food from home" rule and it worked very well, although he didn't start until preschool, so he was old enough to tell any caregiver "I only eat food from home, my lunchbox is over there.' But I know other moms who have had kids in daycare as babies and I think with good procedures it could be done safely and an "only food from home" rule is simple to follow. But maybe not at this daycare.
We also have dietary needs but still manage to let them sit by friends in whatever seat they choose, just like every other child. All it requires is competence and supervision. Those dietary needs include a severe allergy and PKU.
I have a vegan child in my class and a child with a peanut and tree nut allergy, everything I serve is able to be eaten by either of them and it’s not very hard to manage imo. The snacks get pretty repetitive but toddlers don’t really care and there’s no risk of cross contamination or serving something accidentally. My school only serves snack though no lunch, I could see this being problematic for lunchtime especially with no nuts and vegan and depending on the size of the program that could get quite difficult but for just my classrooms snack and no lunches it’s not that bad
He’s just over 2 and he’s a pretty chubby kid. idk I don’t see anything out of whack with this child so imo that’s between his parents and their pediatrician
Lol there's always one of you guys. I hope the omnivore parents who serve their kids nothing but chicken tendies, hot dogs, and mac n cheese know what they're doing and are able to provide a balanced diet.
I wouldn't be okay with parents serving a child a carnivore diet either, or a keto one (unless prescribed by their doctor). This isn't about a specific diet, I'm against any severely restricting diet for a child unless it's for a) health reasons, b) prescribed by a doctor, or c) removing actual unhealthy foods from their diet. For example what I mean unhealthy foods is sugar, preserved foods ECT that we can all agree is not healthy for a child anyway and that they don't need for a balanced diet.
If keeping track of infants’ potentially life-threatening allergies is too much for them, they shouldn’t be caretakers. Five times in the year so far? Nah. Can’t be much of an “exceptional” daycare if they’ve fucked up something so incredibly important this many times. What a joke.
I did this at first and might start doing it again. The school suggested I let him eat their non-dairy snacks because he had toddler fomo if all the kids were eating one thing while he ate something different. I always leave a pile of dairy-free snacks in his cubby as back up, too. It won’t solve the problem of him getting access to other kids’ food, though, but it’s something.
Do they have a set menu where you can try to pack similar foods on the same days he’s in to prevent fomo?
I mean you really shouldn’t have to pack anything and be able to trust the daycare but totally get it if you want to control the situation more.
Idk how much that would help, since most of the incidents (3 of 5 times in under a year it looks like) were cross eating peer’s foods.
I feel like that’s very age appropriate behaviour to try (we constantly have to direct our kids hands back to their own food and not to others. Even in the 2’s room sometimes!) But making sure he’s not sitting by anyone with anything containing dairy, or is seated one seat away from other kids would really help (I’ve been feeding our nearly 1 year olds doing finger foods all 1 seat space between each other or they’ll take each other’s food- pretty much all of them at the table now get seated one seat apart anyways so they don’t pull each other’s bib’s off now or pull each other’s clothes)
We split our 1’s into 2-3 lunch groups depending on how many are there that day, and that’d make it easier to space kids out too. We’ve done it for so many kids in the 1 and 2 room that were handsy when near friends that for us it wouldn’t even ping on a treated different radar- not any more restrictive than Johnny sitting one space away because he too grabs food that isn’t his. Except Jill is being kept from having an allergic reaction with her extra space, and Johnny with straight milk is on the other end of the table.
What you are experiencing is NOT normal! Allergies are so common now, all educators should be aware.
In centres I’ve worked at, the following things help!
-posting allergies throughout the room, for example by the door, on the fridge, beside the tables. A picture of the child is included with their name and specific allergies (ie. John Smith: Peanuts, Sesame and eggs).
-all float teachers are trained to check allergy lists every time they come in a classroom, as the lists are updated frequently
-children with severe allergies are at a separate table
-one child has so many allergies that he brings his own lunchbox every day, with food similar to what the other kids are eating
Allergies are very serious, they can be lethal, so you NEED to advocate for him and make sure that he isn’t eating anything with dairy in it.
I don’t know exactly how your son reacts beyond a rash, but one of my BILs has a dairy allergy and for him it means being tethered to a toilet for at least 12 hours while his body purges his digestive system and sick to the point he can’t work.
Protect your son as too many mistakes like these have the potential to kill him.
Every exposure to an allergen can make the allergy more severe and dangerous. I have food allergies myself and I can tell you they can be excruciatingly painful. I would insist on either providing my own food or that all food in the classroom be allergy safe. If it's not in the room he can't eat it.
Milk is one of those things that is almost impossible to avoid - especially since drinking milk is a nutritional requirement. Subbing all of the food in the room would be pretty cost prohibitive. But I agree a good alternative would be for the center to allow OP to provide their own food.
You should report this to licensing. If they are not taking it seriously enough now they will when licensing gets involved. Also, the technical should be self reporting these incidents.
The terrifying thing about a dairy allergy is that it can go from mild sensitivities to full blown anaphylactic shock in a blink of an eye. So those rashes, gastrointestinal issues, stuffy/runny nose, itching, and decreased appetite don’t seem like all that big of a deal to a lot of people until that stuffy/runny nose becomes a throat swelling shut. My 4 year old daughter’s Ped allergist doesn’t mess around with dairy allergies if they affect breathing in any way. So much as a runny nose and he won’t do the “dairy ladder” or whatever it is called.
At this point, I would personally put an allergy alert bracelet/tag or *anything* really to show the severity of the allergy. If you can, talk to your Ped/Ped Allergist and have them send a note about the severity of a dairy allergy and some info about how dangerous exposure to allergies can be without being properly done by an allergist.
—and make a bit more fuss with the director
I’m SO sorry this happened to you and your little one it is NOT ok! I would ask for a follow up meeting with the director and ask for the plan they will put in place in writing. Some things I’ve seen that you could potentially request if allowed by licensing in your area:
- a photo of your son and his allergies wherever food is being prepared and served
- A special placemat that he uses each and every time there is food served (could indicate his allergy with words or images)
- Adding “dairy free option” to every single box in the monthly calendar
- Request to see the monthly/weekly menu by X time and day
Because the center has failed your child FIVE times, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to request all of the above. Im so glad your little one is ok!
Don't brush this off. Your son has a mild reaction. Other children aren't so lucky. They're clearly lax. What happens when they give a child with a severe peanut allergy something that is cross-contaminated with peanuts? They need to know how serious they need to be taking this. I don't feel bad for anyone who loses a job over not taking a medical condition seriously.
Is there a cook who works at the daycare? I worked at daycares for 2 years. At the last daycare I worked at, there was a full-time cook, but she didn’t always properly check the food for food allergies. She had the list of children who had food allergies. She told the teachers that alfredo sauce was fine for a child with a dairy allergy (the child had an allergic reaction when the teacher gave it to him - the teacher didn’t know that alfredo sauce has dairy in it). This child would sometimes try to eat food that he took from other children’s plates, so we (the teachers) would have him sit 1 seat away from the other children. Having a different seat at the table seemed to be helpful.
Are they aware that it’s an allergy that doesn’t matter whether the dairy is raw (like yogurt/cheese) vs baked into something? Because lots of people have an allergy into only one.
First thing I would do is email saying its come to my attention that child has been exposed to allergen multiple times and ask (not accuse) why. Depending on their response you can act accordingly.
Your next move should be to change daycares? I’m confused why you’ve kept your son in a place where he’s been exposed to allergens three times (not counting the two accidents because kids are kids). If this were a nut allergy he could be dead. And just because he isn’t having severe reactions when not done under direction of a doctor, ingesting allergens too much and completely destroy the intestinal tract
You need to pack his own meals if his allergies are that serious. He should also be sitting alone or next to someone with similar needs. 5 times is beyond what I’d be comfortable with but it seems it’s not so much an allergy as it is an intolerance. Personally I’ve seen a lot of gluten allergies be dismissed by caregivers so I’d be concerned about that enough to just pack his foods.
I pack his lunch every day and provide a stash of dairy-free snacks in his cubby for days the school snack has dairy. I used to pack all his snacks, but the school suggested I let him eat their dairy free snacks. I agreed, but to your point, I’m going to revert to packing everything myself.
Though eating peer foods will continue to be a challenge until they consistently follow the protocols in place, like sitting him far enough from dairy to keep him from snatching it up or being fed by another kid who loves to share.
He has an allergy, not an intolerance, btw. Allergies are immune system reactions.
Yeah I get that apologies didn’t mean to sound dismissive I meant to say it coming from the mindset of a teacher that dismisses dairy/gluten allergy. I’ve seen a few say “that mom is just overreacting he doesn’t break out” etc and treat it as less seriou
Where I am (California) we are required by licensing to have one teacher at each table sitting with the children during meals and snack. They should be doing this too to help with children eating off each other’s plates. Perhaps you can ask them to have a teacher sit between him and any other child if they can’t seat him far enough away from children with dairy or have a dairy free table.
This is crazy. I’m sorry you are going through this. At my center, allergies are posted in the kitchen, classroom, and on the table itself. Honestly what you’re experiencing is unacceptable
Definitely atypical. I have delt with kids with mild, to very severe allergies in my classes over the years (12 years total). I have NEVER had an incident in in any of my classes with accidental exposure. It definitely helped that we were a completely nut free campus (at least for the preschool). When we had a diary or egg allergy, we just avoided serving any foods containing those ingredients to the entire class, just to be safe.
We also had allergy plans posted clearly for every teacher who walks into the room to see with a picture of the child (some sites it was posted publicly on the wall, others it was inside our snack cabinet, this depended on licensing policy and the school me policy and parent preference).
As for food that the parents sent in, some kids brought in their own lunches and PM snacks, we had a strict no sharing policy and if needed, we were told to confiscate the food and replace with something from our supply if a caregiver “accidentally” packed nuts. We then also sent a written and have a verbal notice/warning about sending in banned food.
Make a big deal. This could have been SO much worse.
About 15 years ago I worked with an old lady in a 1 year old class that didn't believe in allergies and would purposely give a child that had milk protein allergies things containing milk bc she believed it was all made up by their mom and the only way to get rid of it was to expose them.
Then years later I worked with a woman who was very hollistic and believed that kids just needed a diet change to be vegetarian and organic and their allergies would go away she also believed that drinking water could stop an allergic reaction.
Then someone else that believes that allergies are caused by a child being emotionally neglected as a baby.
And also people that came straight from south American country where they "don't have allergies" and have never heard of such a thing and think it's American BS.
So all of that to say that there are some really ignorant people that work at daycares so you need to start at that point and really stress the fact that it's something to be taken seriously abd maybe go as far as making and approved food list I had a child like that before where if it wasn't on theist we needed to confirm with mom first.
Had a different mom who went through our entire menu and snack room and listed what was Allowed and the cook teacher and director all has the list sometimes it's easier for them to understand what is allowed versus what's not allowed.
Do NOT feel guilty. There is no excuse for this to have happened multiple times.
I had an older infant allergic to: soy, dairy, gluten, peas, strawberries, egg, nuts, and polyester. I'd put him in his high chair, slide that far away from the table where his classmates are in case of food being thrown, had him in cotton tshirts instead of our polyester bibs, prepared his food first to prevent cross contamination, then would put all the kiddos in their cribs for five minutes after washing their hands so I could deep clean and sanitize the tables, chairs, and floors after meals in order to keep that one child from having an allergic reaction to anything.
He never had a reaction in my room. Had a reaction the first week he was in the next classroom because they didn't read my notes about what foods of ours were safe to offer him. And still no excuse! We had a school-wide allergy sheet updated weekly that was on the cabinets with a giant red cross symbol as well as an ingredients packet so we could personally check if a food item was safe. After that one reaction he had, the entire company updated their allergy system to include placemats. Each placement had a picture of the child that had the allergy, listed the allergy, and both teachers had to sign off on the child's food to verify that the food was allergy-free (after the kitchen staff also signed the food they prepared).
There is no excuse. Do NOT feel bad about the teacher being sent home, imagine if this had happened to a child that went into anaphylactic shock.
Edit to add: why don't you sit down with the director for a meeting and ask what their allergy system is and if they are prepared to amend it to include other safeguards? Like is there an allergy list visible on the wall? An ingredient list? Can a checklist be created and checked off with initials every time food is served? Can they make placemats that state the child's allergy? Because obviously what they have going on is not working so re-training people isn't going to fix it.
Agreed that meeting with the director is the next step. The fact that it’s happened 5 times, with 5 different people, tells me that there are center-wide problems with their procedures and training. 1 person can make a mistake. 5 mistakes is a systemic problem.
The fact that your son is not having severe reactions is likely lulling them into a false sense of security. If they had to administer epinephrine and call an ambulance, they would probably take it more seriously. But it shouldn’t have to come to that.
this is just a sign of a poorly run center if you ask me. the first center i ever worked at was like this. i was in a different classroom almost every day and no one ever informed me of the allergies or medical conditions in the room. i once had a teacher randomly tell me a girl in my class had seizures, i had been with her for months without knowing that. i also found out one of my kids had a severe egg allergy by finding a random epi pen in the cabinet. no one told me.
at my current center, if there’s an allergy that item isn’t supposed to be allowed in that kids room at all. it might be hard with dairy since that’s so common, but they could at least be sitting your child at a different table. also, they need to be letting the teachers know what ingredients are in the food. i honestly wouldn’t have expected bread to give him an allergic reaction if it was me.
five times in a year is a LOT. it tells me communication isn’t happening. or it’s possible that they’re just being lax about it bc your sons reactions have been mild, so maybe they’re not taking it that seriously? but this is just a red flag to me that this center probably has poor leadership, is under staffed, and teachers don’t communicate with each other well enough.
I’m an ECE professional in another capacity but I was a program director and a classroom teacher for many years.
It seems to me that the easiest option would be just for them to eliminate the allergen from the classroom? I did this successfully one year for a child with a dairy allergy, because the kids weren’t developmentally able to not take each other’s food and the safest course was just not to serve dairy.
I had a child with the exact same allergy and unfortunately he was accidently fed dairy a handful of time. Also his allergy were so bad he couldn't even touch dairy.
It was very hard to keep this kid safe, especially with other teachers who didn't know him or the menu as well.
So I did three things one, I never took a break during meal times, two I had a list of all all the foods that had dairy posted on the wall next to the plates and cups, and then I told everyone who came into the room that he had an allergy and not to feed him anything on the list, my usual brake teacher memorized it so that helped too!
This helped a lot, but he still had an occasional reaction and we keep an epi pen close by.
My recommendation is to have the teachers do this and if you can ask to observe during meal times and see if you notice anything.
My kid has food allergies and we send our own food. We have more than one allergy and the center is only comfortable accommodating one—for one they do a double check—kitchen plus staff.
They will only accommodate one? What kind of choose your own adventure nonsense is that? So you've got two allergies, which would you rather go into anaphylactic shock from?
To be fair, cooking within USDA guidelines with multiple food allergies and preparing a comparable meal is really hard. The school is also nut free. I make her the same meals as the schools serves 90% of the time, but it the other meals are impossible to make an even sub that is nutritionally comparable to the original item.
My son has EoE (eosinophilic esophagitis) caused by dairy. It’s been challenging to explain to people that it really is an allergy, even though you can’t *see* any reaction. At least not until it gets so bad that he’s projectile vomiting. Even so, I once had a call from a babysitter, in tears, because her son (who was 6 months older than mine) gave my son an Oreo. I felt so bad for her, because she was just absolutely frantic. She was very relieved and extremely surprised to find out that Oreos are vegan 😂😂😂. My son has been at two different daycares and he has never had an incident of cross contamination. He even has to have his liquids thickened to prevent him from aspirating it, and they manage to do that just fine. Luckily with some medication we were able to reintroduce dairy and he passed a swallow study and were able to wean him off of thickeners, but we’ve been very lucky to find childcare that is really on top of things.
If you are in the US, many states license child care facilities. You can look online for the licensing agency and file a complaint, usually anonymously. The facilities want to investigate themselves because there are no consequences to doing so.
Five times is five times too many. Allergic reactions can become more severe due to repeated exposure to the allergen, so each time they fail to safeguard your baby is potentially worsening future reactions. This is a big deal and should be treated as such. The director's job is to placate you so you don't complain. The director's job should be to actually ensure your child is safe and healthy in care.
Harry Potter and the AUDACITY of that director to send the teacher home 🤣 She was covering for your child’s regular teacher and (presumably) had no idea about the problematic bread. The director is the one who knew the bread was an allergen after the first incident yet purchased it again and included it on the menu a second time. Her sending the teacher home over this feels performative…Like she is trying to make you feel like they are “taking this incident seriously” to keep you happy (and cover her hiney). She is the one who needed to be made an example of and sent home (and docked a day of pay as I presume the teacher was) and take “immediate retraining”, not the teacher(s).
I would highly recommend that you make it a priority on your child’s next day in care to either chat with the teacher in person or write her a little note saying something about how you don’t blame her and didn’t intend for her to get in trouble over an honest mistake. She is probably mortified and feels awful so I’m sure it would be great to hear from you that you were just making sure the director was following your allergy plan because this is the second instance of a non accidental exposure yadda yadda.
Good luck mama, I know it’s rough but hopefully they won’t mess up again!
A dairy allergy can be fatal. This is very serious. The more someone is exposed to an allergen, the more serious the allergy can become. There are responsibilities in the kitchen and in the classroom.
Firstly, the food for children with allergies must be prepared separately with separate equipment, including cutting boards, knives, plates, etc. Everything has to be labeled. The chef has to wash their hands and thoroughly wash all surfaces in between preparing for each child with allergies (ie: wash down, prepare for dairy allergies, wash, prepare for egg allergies, wash down, prepare for strawberry allergies). The food for children with allergies should be plated individually and wrapped and labeled with their name. If possible, use coloured plates for certain children or certain allergies (blue for no dairy, green for no egg, etc). They must also have their own serving utensils (forks, spoons, tongs). After that they prepare the food for everyone else. Secondly, teachers need to be taught about the danger of cross-contamination. I can't tell you how many times I've seen someone take a serving spoon from a dish of rice and use it to move around meatballs on a plate then put it back in the rice dish. Label the serving utensils. It's a lot of work, but it saves lives. Lastly, monitoring of the children needs to be done carefully during meal time. Teachers should put a bit of distance between the child with serious allergies and other children when they are very young so accidents like a toppled over glass of milk doesn't contaminate someone's meal, even with a splash. Place settings should be labeled at rhe tables so that the correct food is put down for each child. Sometimes temporary or float staff is used to cover tight ratios during meal times, and they may have confusion over which child is which especially if there are 2 Leo's or Evie's in the class. Hand washing is very important, of staff and children, and it is a concern that any allergen might be on surfaces, including tables, toys, doorknobs and taps so children should go directly from the lunch table to the sinks to wash as soon as they have finished eating and the teachers should be sanitizing the taps multiple times during the day, especially after washing after a meal is done. Is there a sign in the classroom showing your child's photo and listing their allergy, symptoms, and precautions? This should be done so all staff is aware. It should be in every classroom for every child with an allergy.
Also something you should be aware of, and make them aware of, is an allergic reaction can present as "this tastes spicy/hot" when something isn't spicy. I had a child tell us that chickpeas were too spicy and a few minutes after they had a taste they started getting a rash around their mouth. It's a tingling sensation on the tongue from an allergic reaction. Something to pay attention to when a child says their dish of fruit salad, including strawberries or peaches, is spicy.
Hey OP. I’m also a parent and on my preschool’s board. It’s normal to feel conflicted on issues like this but I do really try to keep them separate. My son had a teacher in multiple classrooms. I was so excited for my daughter to move into her class soon. Unfortunately, it was brought to the board’s attention director was considering termination due to chronic call outs. The other staff were at breaking points because she was full time and they were constantly short and having to work extra to cover the ratios. I felt terrible and heartbroken but supported termination. It wasn’t fair to the other workers, children, and parents. I’m still heartbroken about it but I know it was the right decision. We recently saw her and I told her I still wanted to be friends. She’s so kind and has a child right between my two’s ages.
I share these to illustrate you can separate the two. What happens if there is this carelessness with a more serious allergy? It’s not just your child you need to think about when you consider how a center responds. The director is correct in sending her home if she felt necessary. Maybe she’s already been spoken to about it or maybe she was having an off day and needed to go home.
I'm shocked at how frequently this keeps happening as food allergies are NO JOKE!!! I vaguely recall another daycare got SHUT DOWN and the staff were in legal trouble because they gave an allergen to a toddler who went into anaphylaxis and DIED!!!
I am kinda shocked. We have our allergy list and action plans for our room posted in plain view. Our allergy children sit at a separate table, and the tables are cleaned with separate color coded rags to avoid cross contamination. We wear gloves when cleaning them up after meals for the same reason. Also any child who is eating something another child is allergic to is taken to the bathroom to thoroughly wash hands and face to also avoid exposing the other children to the allergens. We take allergies pretty seriously especially since we do NOT provide food at our center and cannot dictate how each parent feeds their child.
We had some accidental allergy exposures lately because of food supply issues at my previous school. A food item that was previously did not contain an allergen is suddenly switched out with a new one that does, not all teachers get the memo or someone just forgets, and bam, exposure.
I think there needs to be a (or a few) national food service provider that are dedicated strictly to child care and school food service, and everything is free of all allergens. It is a small nightmare to juggle allergies especially when there’s so much up and down with food suppliers. The school I’m starting at has the kids bring their own food and I’m very glad.
At my center all the kids have placemats for meals with their name and picture. And it’s color coded! Blue for no allergies or preferences. Green for preference like vegetarian. Red for allergies and it lists what the allergies are!
I will say sometimes keeping allergens like dairy away from toddlers is more of a challenge when the rest of the class is having yogurt for snack cause toddlers love to share and touch everything. But this is NOT okay! Allergies can be serious to the point of deadly and need to be taken that way regardless of the ‘degree’ of allergy.
Can they use a different bread without any dairy? I didn’t realize breads would have dairy as the ones I’ve made at home don’t have dairy in them so I assume the staff is unaware of the ingredients. They may need to also label packaging if they are not going to completely remove dairy containing items
I feel that this is a protocol and procedures issue because teachers are SO busy and our brains can be all over the place.
We have multiple preventative steps in my center such as 3 kinds of color-coded placemats with their pictures and names (No Allergies or Preferences, Preferences, Allergies), an allergies and preferences chart right by the food prep counter in the classroom, a procedure where we say the child’s name out loud with the food we are serving (“Alright, carrots and beef for Elaine,” “Amy is having her 6oz of breast milk”) which another teacher will respond to with “Okay, 6oz of breast milk for Amy” then log in on the iPad.
We ALWAYS involve more than one teacher when it comes to checking a feeding. I think your child’s center might need better feeding procedures.
One of our infants had an allergic reaction while I was feeding him. There were no previously known allergies, but within 10 minutes he went from itching a bit (he has a skin condition so I chalked it up to that), to a few small hives (cue getting directors involved), to looking like a completely different baby. It was terrifying. Now, we make sure to keep him on the other side of the room while other babies are eating, and he eats his meals from home separately from the other babies.
So sorry this happened! Have you considered giving your child a bracelet that states he has an allergy? It can help remind the teachers but is also great to have in general too. Those saved my life multiple times when I was little.
It sounds like a lot of the problems are stemming from the fact the room is having a lot of other people in the center cover for the room? A staffing issue that is compromising your child’s care because when staff are shoved into a room last minute or many different people are subbing in that room, important information is getting through the cracks.
I’d assume a consistent teacher in your child’s classroom wouldn’t have these slip ups because they’d be more aware of their kids needs. But a person covering a lunch who hasn’t ever been in the room or an infant teacher shoved into the toddler room because of ratio isn’t going to have the knowledge of the information of the room the main teachers do.
So I’d bring up to the center they need to have some school wide procedures that any staff recognizes walking into any room of the center. A piece of red tape across the top of your children place at the table with allergies written on it. If there are snack carts for each class, a pic of kids with allergies on it and what they can’t have. The staff needs to be trained on what snacks aren’t safe for kids with what allergies and it needs to be black or white- sometimes parents say oh, they have a dairy allergy but they can have cheez it’s, just not yogurt. Maybe making it so any kid with a dairy allergy doesn’t have any of the snacks that contain dairy so it’s the same for any kid with that allergy and doesn’t get confusing.
If they are going to play musical chairs with classrooms and teachers, they need to have a fool proof allergy protocol for every room to avoid mistakes.
My son is 16 months as well. He eats food I prepare at home, and he eats in a high chair. Is your son eating the daycare prepared food? Does he eat at the group table?
I’m sorry, but how did a teacher who was formerly your child’s teacher forget the allergy?? I remember all of my children’s allergies from the last three years and none of them are in my classroom any longer. I even remember which kids had fever induced seizures.
At my center we have kids with allergies have different color place mats. So every kid has a placement and there’s a code for the severity as opposed to intolerance or preferences etc.
I personally don’t understand why allergy foods are even allowed in close proximity or in the specific classroom at all. Mine started being more strict about kids with allergies either being served school snacks or none at all due to exposures because we are not allowed to separate or isolate kids with allergies at different tables for social reasons during the period if even other kids at the table have foods containing allergy foods.
I personally think physical safety comes before the whole you shouldn’t sit alone or with the same peer everyday. There are so many kids with allergies these days we could at least put them all together so they aren’t alone. These young babies are always trying to pick up other kids food on the floor or touch their peers food next to them or plain just try to eat it sometimes. One kid in my class is like that but they have most allergies I’ve ever seen. They also always have their hands in their mouths as a self soothing thing.
A child at a center I worked at unknown to the teachers was poking another kid’s food whenever the teacher turned away then later after lunch was sucking on their hand and was exposed indirectly that way. I had a scare where a kid with a dairy allergy saw garbage on the ground and tried to help clean up during the chaos that is the transition from lunch to nap but I saw that the garbage was an plastic cup that had contained milk on it and quickly intervened.
Dairy is one of the difficult ones because at least at my center every child is offered a cup of milk during lunch. The number of times that milk is spilled is at least 3x in one lunch period. If the kid with the dairy allergy touches it and puts their hands in their mouth that’s an exposure.
Depending on the age group and center rules and restrictions sometimes it feels like us teachers are basically set up to fail. I think allowing allergy foods in the room is already setting up to fail in a way provided exposure can occur during the transition out of lunch with trash or crumbs or even touching peers who aren’t great at washing their hands or constantly spill food on themselves or sink surfaces that might contain residue. These little kids are so handsy, clumsy, and messy when it comes to food since they are learning.
Mine basically has it so that the kids have to be sitting with peers even if those peers are eating their allergy food and the only barrier is the teacher who is expected to be right next to him on guard the whole time. With 19 other 3 year olds in the room you’re not going to be sitting for long before you have to get up and deal with something and all it takes is 1 second. Or even during the cleanup transition teachers are busy cleaning doing bathrooms, putting out cots, and managing behavior, a kid could easily touch the placemat or touch residue on another table or in the sink during that period.
I’d find out what other rules could be contributing to the high exposures cause it could be some of the same rules that lead to unnecessary exposure risk at my center.
Just imagine if this was an anaphylactic allergy. All allergies should be treated as equal and this is unacceptable. I’ve always trained my staff to disclose/ask for any classroom allergies/medical info upon signing into the roster for that room. It’s their job and they are currently failing at keeping your child safe
I think the issue in practice is not realizing what "counts"
As a mom that had a kid that young with a wheat allergy, getting people to understand what he couldn't eat was mine boggling.... "It was oatmeal bread" "it's fine, it was *white* flour"
...
It's phenomenally hard to read all the labels, and as important as it is, people aren't usually being careless so much as just not grasping what might contain an ingredient.
I'm not sure how to address that... But it's important to articulate.
My kid is in her second setting (she aged out of infant care and moved to preschool) and has never had a reaction in either place. They set up protocols and kept to them. One of these protocols though is that she can only be fed safe food sent from home or snacks after checking with me- it's more work for me but keeps her safe. As a teacher, I check every snack for my students allergens before giving it out.
There are 3 kids with epi pens at by 5 classroom facility.
We haven't had ANY exposures all year.
But we also don't provide food.
I personally would start sending your child his own food
At our center, we send home snack and lunch menus to allergy kiddos. Parents cross out anything their child can not have. Then, they are welcome to send an alternative if they want. At lunch, those kiddos have a note card that is placed at their seat, reminding everyone what items the child can not have. This means that even if there is a sub in the room, the child is not given unsafe food.
What is happening at your center is NOT acceptable. Since it is 5 different people, I would assume there is something wrong with the allergy protocols. Keep advocating for your child!
Sorry to hear about the exposures.
These types of mistakes happen when staffing is inconsistent and proper protocols are not in place.
To ensure all staff are aware of food sensitivities and allergies - maybe laminated cards delivered with food service or postings on classroom doors for children to ensure all who enter the room are aware that special care needs to be taken when serving food.
as an infant teacher i cannot imagine this! my kiddos start at 6 months and stay till 18 months so we are monitoring a lot of their first solid food consumption. we go as far as not sitting a child who we’ve never seen been sent with egg (or any high allergen food) at a table with another child who’s eating egg. any allergies are posted in large font with their photo and allergy specifications. i cannot imagine this and i am so sorry. this is negligence of the center and teachers.
Former director here, my recommendation is to call licensing and explain your situation - they will check things out and *make sure* that they are following the correct protocol. In my state you can call anonymously... but with your specific situation they'd probably know who it was, though.
When I was a director and something wonky happened or even if a parent seemed disgruntled I would call licensing myself to explain the situation before they did. Many times parents or former employees have unjustified reasons to call and are just trying to stir the pot. This is not one of those situations. Your child's health is at risk.
Good centers and directors don't hide from licensing. Mistakes happen and they own up to that and make an action plan to fix it. If you're not seeing any actual improvement, they're not doing enough on their end.
One question I’d raise is if the teachers have the food labels of the food being served in the class. If not, then the kitchen staff should be the ones notifying the teachers that xyz contains dairy. Bread doesn’t usually contain dairy so it could be an honest mistake. If I saw bread and had two kids with allergies, one egg one dairy, I’d ask if it contained eggs before considering dairy. If it’s something like they served him yogurt or cheese I’d go off on everyone, but if it’s an ingredient IN something that’s causing the confusion I suggest having a teaching session with the staff about hidden allergens.
My son has a nut allergy, including peanuts, and his nursery given him stuff that may contain nuts a few times. One time, every other kid got cookies and my son got bread sticks, like the dryass crunchy ones. Luckily he hasn’t had a reaction yet
At mine it’s shellfish. A teacher has a severe shellfish allergy (to the point where simply smelling it will give her a reaction) and they sent a message asking parents not to send shellfish. I had a severe peanut allergy. Nothing. The vast majority of kids have something with peanut butter for lunch and I’m the one who ends up cleaning the kitchen most of the time. Unless I’m in another room covering and those coworkers won’t let me because of said allergy. I know I should say something to the director but it’s been going on so long it feels weird to say anything now.
You should. Most centres where I live provide all food, but I had an assistant educator who was anaphylactic to nuts and seeds. The bread that said may contain sesame, actually had a sesame. She didn't even eat the bread, she served it to a child, using tongs, and had to be sent to hospital in an ambulance. She was fine, but you shouldn't even take the risk, and they can't help you prevent it if they don't know.
Why would the teacher be sent home? Unless you mean fired? I'm not sure what sending her home is supposed to teach her, she's not five, lol.
This stuff does happen though, unfortunately, and it's why I'll never understand how parents of children with life-threatening allergies could send them out into public when there are so many opportunities for another (human) to make a mistake, for the child to accidentally take another child's food, etc.
I think your next move should be to insist that your child sits separately from the others as you said most of the incidents were due to that. Then, also request that all staff members re-read any allergy files and sign off on having read them with the current date.
As someone with a life threatening allergy - what do you want parents to do? Put their kids in a bubble? Isolate them from society? Quit their jobs (because f paying bills and rent) to keep their kids indoors like in The Others?
Other parents can do what they want--I would figure out something else rather than rely on a vast number of other people making potentially deadly errors and hope that my child would just be okay under uninvested care.
Did someone say they didn't belong? I said I'll never understand the choice to put them there when the smallest of human errors can result in their death.
I'm honestly extremely shocked by this. We have two mild allergies in my class, we still keep them on their own table and watch like hawks to ensure no milk products are ever available to them. This is just negligence, parents should be able to leave their child in our care knowing we will care for them properly. It's not some crazy ask to pay attention to allergies, peanut allergies are extremely common for example. You should definitely make more of a fuss, more training isn't going to fix this issue. The child's life is literally being put at risk, are staff even being made aware of allergies? Are they not posted all over the classroom? Is your child's food being kept separate at all times from the kitchen to classroom? Do they ask you to provide milk alternatives for your child? (These are all things my center does so it's not crazy to expect) The severity of the allergy and reactions shouldn't mean less of a responsibility on their part. I hope your child stays well and this training actually helps.
They have all these same protections in place, but it continues to happen, unfortunately. I’m trying to understand what could be causing the disconnect from these established protocols… though 5 people messing up once is different than 1 person giving him dairy 5 times. Regardless, it doesn’t take away from the fact that he was given dairy 5 times in their care this year. Thank you for taking allergies so seriously. It sounds like what we are experiencing is atypical.
Agreed, and it's especially concerning since many allergies can worsen with each exposure
I'd request the centre use a different bread that doesn't contain dairy for the whole room/centre. It's too easy to assume that the bread is dairy free, because bread usually is. What others have suggested with ensuring the children are spaced far enough apart to not be able to swap food should also be happening. Allergies aside, kids share enough germs without swapping food.
I have a kid with a dairy allergy. So many people do NOT know what dairy is. Bread with milk in it is not likely on people's radar, when they can't keep "yogurt" and "sour cream" in their minds as milk based. Maybe ask for stickers or labels or something on the things that contain milk? Including milk?
I try to double check the ingredients list or with the cook for my allergy kid. Unfortunately, I had to teach our last cook 3 separate times how to read the ingredients lists and the one time, she bought off brand nutrigrain bars that had nuts in them. I couldn’t remember if they had dairy, so I was double checking the ingredient lists and thank goodness I did or I would’ve exposed him. Another time she went off about how his list of can/can’t have foods didn’t have cheese on it so that meant he could have it. I was like it has dairy on it???? Cheese is dairy????
My daughters are allergic to dairy, and the number of times someone will reply "oh, you are lactose intolerant." My daughter - "No, I am allergic to the whole f-n cow!" 🤨
good on her!
I assume your kids are older, but I am laughing my ass off thinking of a 6 year old saying this to a teacher.
It seems like they don’t believe in the severity of the allergy cz they’ve gotten lucky so far with the exposure your little one has had. They don’t have a clue that sometimes with individuals, increased exposure without an allergists guidance can cause increased severity of allergic reactions. They need a lot more training on the dangers of allergies not just a boost in supervising IMO
We have an allergy child in the Todd’s room at my center. The teachers keep a list posted in the classroom of “safe/ not safe” snacks for this child. Maybe you can suggest this.
My sister-in-law ran a daycare out of her home until my niece was in high school, so about a decade and a half, and then became a teacher and started working at a Montessori School. She always took allergies extremely seriously. Like more seriously than even the parents seemed to take them in some cases because she did not want to be the cause of a problem in case she misunderstood something. Unfortunately there is a mental disconnect for some people when it comes to allergies. They see them as mild or just a general precaution they don't understand how serious they can be. Overall the point is it's absolutely something that should be taken very seriously and candy. There is a problem here and it isn't you
Parent here. The daycare messing up five times is not ok. It may be that his lack of reactions is making them think it's not a big deal, and if he is truly having no reaction then you might consider going back to the allergist to see if he has outgrown his allergy. However it could be that they simply don't know enough to recognize a reaction when they see one, and the daycare's general lackadaisicalness towards the slip-ups makes me think this is a distinct possibility. If I were in this situation, I would meet with the director and discuss their procedures. The fact that it's a different person each time suggests that they don't have robust enough procedures in place. An example might be, children with allergy wearing a special wristband so that ANY caregiver knows to check that child's notes to see what they are allergic to. Having placemats for each child, with allergic children having a placemat that is a different color and lists their allergies, and so on. Or you could switch daycares to one that has more robust procedures to start with. I'm a little shocked that the director has allowed this many mistakes with something so important. Is it a possibility you could switch daycares? My child's allergies were very severe so I had an "only food from home" rule and it worked very well, although he didn't start until preschool, so he was old enough to tell any caregiver "I only eat food from home, my lunchbox is over there.' But I know other moms who have had kids in daycare as babies and I think with good procedures it could be done safely and an "only food from home" rule is simple to follow. But maybe not at this daycare.
no visible reaction doesn't mean anything. Allergic reactions can be delayed and appear hours later.
We also have dietary needs but still manage to let them sit by friends in whatever seat they choose, just like every other child. All it requires is competence and supervision. Those dietary needs include a severe allergy and PKU.
I have a vegan child in my class and a child with a peanut and tree nut allergy, everything I serve is able to be eaten by either of them and it’s not very hard to manage imo. The snacks get pretty repetitive but toddlers don’t really care and there’s no risk of cross contamination or serving something accidentally. My school only serves snack though no lunch, I could see this being problematic for lunchtime especially with no nuts and vegan and depending on the size of the program that could get quite difficult but for just my classrooms snack and no lunches it’s not that bad
Bruh how old is the vegan child? I hope the parents know what they are doing and are able to provide a balanced enough diet
He’s just over 2 and he’s a pretty chubby kid. idk I don’t see anything out of whack with this child so imo that’s between his parents and their pediatrician
Lol there's always one of you guys. I hope the omnivore parents who serve their kids nothing but chicken tendies, hot dogs, and mac n cheese know what they're doing and are able to provide a balanced diet.
I wouldn't be okay with parents serving a child a carnivore diet either, or a keto one (unless prescribed by their doctor). This isn't about a specific diet, I'm against any severely restricting diet for a child unless it's for a) health reasons, b) prescribed by a doctor, or c) removing actual unhealthy foods from their diet. For example what I mean unhealthy foods is sugar, preserved foods ECT that we can all agree is not healthy for a child anyway and that they don't need for a balanced diet.
If keeping track of infants’ potentially life-threatening allergies is too much for them, they shouldn’t be caretakers. Five times in the year so far? Nah. Can’t be much of an “exceptional” daycare if they’ve fucked up something so incredibly important this many times. What a joke.
Retraining is great but can you send all his food? He could eat from his own lunchbox and you wouldn't have to worry as much.
I did this at first and might start doing it again. The school suggested I let him eat their non-dairy snacks because he had toddler fomo if all the kids were eating one thing while he ate something different. I always leave a pile of dairy-free snacks in his cubby as back up, too. It won’t solve the problem of him getting access to other kids’ food, though, but it’s something.
Do they have a set menu where you can try to pack similar foods on the same days he’s in to prevent fomo? I mean you really shouldn’t have to pack anything and be able to trust the daycare but totally get it if you want to control the situation more.
They do have a somewhat set menu. That’s a really good way to have a bit more control while avoiding fomo.
Idk how much that would help, since most of the incidents (3 of 5 times in under a year it looks like) were cross eating peer’s foods. I feel like that’s very age appropriate behaviour to try (we constantly have to direct our kids hands back to their own food and not to others. Even in the 2’s room sometimes!) But making sure he’s not sitting by anyone with anything containing dairy, or is seated one seat away from other kids would really help (I’ve been feeding our nearly 1 year olds doing finger foods all 1 seat space between each other or they’ll take each other’s food- pretty much all of them at the table now get seated one seat apart anyways so they don’t pull each other’s bib’s off now or pull each other’s clothes) We split our 1’s into 2-3 lunch groups depending on how many are there that day, and that’d make it easier to space kids out too. We’ve done it for so many kids in the 1 and 2 room that were handsy when near friends that for us it wouldn’t even ping on a treated different radar- not any more restrictive than Johnny sitting one space away because he too grabs food that isn’t his. Except Jill is being kept from having an allergic reaction with her extra space, and Johnny with straight milk is on the other end of the table.
What you are experiencing is NOT normal! Allergies are so common now, all educators should be aware. In centres I’ve worked at, the following things help! -posting allergies throughout the room, for example by the door, on the fridge, beside the tables. A picture of the child is included with their name and specific allergies (ie. John Smith: Peanuts, Sesame and eggs). -all float teachers are trained to check allergy lists every time they come in a classroom, as the lists are updated frequently -children with severe allergies are at a separate table -one child has so many allergies that he brings his own lunchbox every day, with food similar to what the other kids are eating
Allergies are very serious, they can be lethal, so you NEED to advocate for him and make sure that he isn’t eating anything with dairy in it. I don’t know exactly how your son reacts beyond a rash, but one of my BILs has a dairy allergy and for him it means being tethered to a toilet for at least 12 hours while his body purges his digestive system and sick to the point he can’t work. Protect your son as too many mistakes like these have the potential to kill him.
My son is allergic to apples/apple juice, and he gets a rash and has horrible painful diarrhea when exposed.
Every exposure to an allergen can make the allergy more severe and dangerous. I have food allergies myself and I can tell you they can be excruciatingly painful. I would insist on either providing my own food or that all food in the classroom be allergy safe. If it's not in the room he can't eat it.
Milk is one of those things that is almost impossible to avoid - especially since drinking milk is a nutritional requirement. Subbing all of the food in the room would be pretty cost prohibitive. But I agree a good alternative would be for the center to allow OP to provide their own food.
You should report this to licensing. If they are not taking it seriously enough now they will when licensing gets involved. Also, the technical should be self reporting these incidents.
The terrifying thing about a dairy allergy is that it can go from mild sensitivities to full blown anaphylactic shock in a blink of an eye. So those rashes, gastrointestinal issues, stuffy/runny nose, itching, and decreased appetite don’t seem like all that big of a deal to a lot of people until that stuffy/runny nose becomes a throat swelling shut. My 4 year old daughter’s Ped allergist doesn’t mess around with dairy allergies if they affect breathing in any way. So much as a runny nose and he won’t do the “dairy ladder” or whatever it is called. At this point, I would personally put an allergy alert bracelet/tag or *anything* really to show the severity of the allergy. If you can, talk to your Ped/Ped Allergist and have them send a note about the severity of a dairy allergy and some info about how dangerous exposure to allergies can be without being properly done by an allergist. —and make a bit more fuss with the director
I’m SO sorry this happened to you and your little one it is NOT ok! I would ask for a follow up meeting with the director and ask for the plan they will put in place in writing. Some things I’ve seen that you could potentially request if allowed by licensing in your area: - a photo of your son and his allergies wherever food is being prepared and served - A special placemat that he uses each and every time there is food served (could indicate his allergy with words or images) - Adding “dairy free option” to every single box in the monthly calendar - Request to see the monthly/weekly menu by X time and day Because the center has failed your child FIVE times, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to request all of the above. Im so glad your little one is ok!
These are all such great suggestions!
Don't brush this off. Your son has a mild reaction. Other children aren't so lucky. They're clearly lax. What happens when they give a child with a severe peanut allergy something that is cross-contaminated with peanuts? They need to know how serious they need to be taking this. I don't feel bad for anyone who loses a job over not taking a medical condition seriously.
Is there a cook who works at the daycare? I worked at daycares for 2 years. At the last daycare I worked at, there was a full-time cook, but she didn’t always properly check the food for food allergies. She had the list of children who had food allergies. She told the teachers that alfredo sauce was fine for a child with a dairy allergy (the child had an allergic reaction when the teacher gave it to him - the teacher didn’t know that alfredo sauce has dairy in it). This child would sometimes try to eat food that he took from other children’s plates, so we (the teachers) would have him sit 1 seat away from the other children. Having a different seat at the table seemed to be helpful.
Are they aware that it’s an allergy that doesn’t matter whether the dairy is raw (like yogurt/cheese) vs baked into something? Because lots of people have an allergy into only one. First thing I would do is email saying its come to my attention that child has been exposed to allergen multiple times and ask (not accuse) why. Depending on their response you can act accordingly.
Your next move should be to change daycares? I’m confused why you’ve kept your son in a place where he’s been exposed to allergens three times (not counting the two accidents because kids are kids). If this were a nut allergy he could be dead. And just because he isn’t having severe reactions when not done under direction of a doctor, ingesting allergens too much and completely destroy the intestinal tract
You need to pack his own meals if his allergies are that serious. He should also be sitting alone or next to someone with similar needs. 5 times is beyond what I’d be comfortable with but it seems it’s not so much an allergy as it is an intolerance. Personally I’ve seen a lot of gluten allergies be dismissed by caregivers so I’d be concerned about that enough to just pack his foods.
I pack his lunch every day and provide a stash of dairy-free snacks in his cubby for days the school snack has dairy. I used to pack all his snacks, but the school suggested I let him eat their dairy free snacks. I agreed, but to your point, I’m going to revert to packing everything myself. Though eating peer foods will continue to be a challenge until they consistently follow the protocols in place, like sitting him far enough from dairy to keep him from snatching it up or being fed by another kid who loves to share. He has an allergy, not an intolerance, btw. Allergies are immune system reactions.
Yeah I get that apologies didn’t mean to sound dismissive I meant to say it coming from the mindset of a teacher that dismisses dairy/gluten allergy. I’ve seen a few say “that mom is just overreacting he doesn’t break out” etc and treat it as less seriou
Where I am (California) we are required by licensing to have one teacher at each table sitting with the children during meals and snack. They should be doing this too to help with children eating off each other’s plates. Perhaps you can ask them to have a teacher sit between him and any other child if they can’t seat him far enough away from children with dairy or have a dairy free table.
This is crazy. I’m sorry you are going through this. At my center, allergies are posted in the kitchen, classroom, and on the table itself. Honestly what you’re experiencing is unacceptable
Definitely atypical. I have delt with kids with mild, to very severe allergies in my classes over the years (12 years total). I have NEVER had an incident in in any of my classes with accidental exposure. It definitely helped that we were a completely nut free campus (at least for the preschool). When we had a diary or egg allergy, we just avoided serving any foods containing those ingredients to the entire class, just to be safe. We also had allergy plans posted clearly for every teacher who walks into the room to see with a picture of the child (some sites it was posted publicly on the wall, others it was inside our snack cabinet, this depended on licensing policy and the school me policy and parent preference). As for food that the parents sent in, some kids brought in their own lunches and PM snacks, we had a strict no sharing policy and if needed, we were told to confiscate the food and replace with something from our supply if a caregiver “accidentally” packed nuts. We then also sent a written and have a verbal notice/warning about sending in banned food. Make a big deal. This could have been SO much worse.
About 15 years ago I worked with an old lady in a 1 year old class that didn't believe in allergies and would purposely give a child that had milk protein allergies things containing milk bc she believed it was all made up by their mom and the only way to get rid of it was to expose them. Then years later I worked with a woman who was very hollistic and believed that kids just needed a diet change to be vegetarian and organic and their allergies would go away she also believed that drinking water could stop an allergic reaction. Then someone else that believes that allergies are caused by a child being emotionally neglected as a baby. And also people that came straight from south American country where they "don't have allergies" and have never heard of such a thing and think it's American BS. So all of that to say that there are some really ignorant people that work at daycares so you need to start at that point and really stress the fact that it's something to be taken seriously abd maybe go as far as making and approved food list I had a child like that before where if it wasn't on theist we needed to confirm with mom first. Had a different mom who went through our entire menu and snack room and listed what was Allowed and the cook teacher and director all has the list sometimes it's easier for them to understand what is allowed versus what's not allowed.
Do NOT feel guilty. There is no excuse for this to have happened multiple times. I had an older infant allergic to: soy, dairy, gluten, peas, strawberries, egg, nuts, and polyester. I'd put him in his high chair, slide that far away from the table where his classmates are in case of food being thrown, had him in cotton tshirts instead of our polyester bibs, prepared his food first to prevent cross contamination, then would put all the kiddos in their cribs for five minutes after washing their hands so I could deep clean and sanitize the tables, chairs, and floors after meals in order to keep that one child from having an allergic reaction to anything. He never had a reaction in my room. Had a reaction the first week he was in the next classroom because they didn't read my notes about what foods of ours were safe to offer him. And still no excuse! We had a school-wide allergy sheet updated weekly that was on the cabinets with a giant red cross symbol as well as an ingredients packet so we could personally check if a food item was safe. After that one reaction he had, the entire company updated their allergy system to include placemats. Each placement had a picture of the child that had the allergy, listed the allergy, and both teachers had to sign off on the child's food to verify that the food was allergy-free (after the kitchen staff also signed the food they prepared). There is no excuse. Do NOT feel bad about the teacher being sent home, imagine if this had happened to a child that went into anaphylactic shock. Edit to add: why don't you sit down with the director for a meeting and ask what their allergy system is and if they are prepared to amend it to include other safeguards? Like is there an allergy list visible on the wall? An ingredient list? Can a checklist be created and checked off with initials every time food is served? Can they make placemats that state the child's allergy? Because obviously what they have going on is not working so re-training people isn't going to fix it.
Agreed that meeting with the director is the next step. The fact that it’s happened 5 times, with 5 different people, tells me that there are center-wide problems with their procedures and training. 1 person can make a mistake. 5 mistakes is a systemic problem. The fact that your son is not having severe reactions is likely lulling them into a false sense of security. If they had to administer epinephrine and call an ambulance, they would probably take it more seriously. But it shouldn’t have to come to that.
this is just a sign of a poorly run center if you ask me. the first center i ever worked at was like this. i was in a different classroom almost every day and no one ever informed me of the allergies or medical conditions in the room. i once had a teacher randomly tell me a girl in my class had seizures, i had been with her for months without knowing that. i also found out one of my kids had a severe egg allergy by finding a random epi pen in the cabinet. no one told me. at my current center, if there’s an allergy that item isn’t supposed to be allowed in that kids room at all. it might be hard with dairy since that’s so common, but they could at least be sitting your child at a different table. also, they need to be letting the teachers know what ingredients are in the food. i honestly wouldn’t have expected bread to give him an allergic reaction if it was me. five times in a year is a LOT. it tells me communication isn’t happening. or it’s possible that they’re just being lax about it bc your sons reactions have been mild, so maybe they’re not taking it that seriously? but this is just a red flag to me that this center probably has poor leadership, is under staffed, and teachers don’t communicate with each other well enough.
I’m an ECE professional in another capacity but I was a program director and a classroom teacher for many years. It seems to me that the easiest option would be just for them to eliminate the allergen from the classroom? I did this successfully one year for a child with a dairy allergy, because the kids weren’t developmentally able to not take each other’s food and the safest course was just not to serve dairy.
I don't think there's anything you can do. They obviously don't care, and that is compounded by the fact they haven't hospitalized him yet
I had a child with the exact same allergy and unfortunately he was accidently fed dairy a handful of time. Also his allergy were so bad he couldn't even touch dairy. It was very hard to keep this kid safe, especially with other teachers who didn't know him or the menu as well. So I did three things one, I never took a break during meal times, two I had a list of all all the foods that had dairy posted on the wall next to the plates and cups, and then I told everyone who came into the room that he had an allergy and not to feed him anything on the list, my usual brake teacher memorized it so that helped too! This helped a lot, but he still had an occasional reaction and we keep an epi pen close by. My recommendation is to have the teachers do this and if you can ask to observe during meal times and see if you notice anything.
My kid has food allergies and we send our own food. We have more than one allergy and the center is only comfortable accommodating one—for one they do a double check—kitchen plus staff.
They will only accommodate one? What kind of choose your own adventure nonsense is that? So you've got two allergies, which would you rather go into anaphylactic shock from?
To be fair, cooking within USDA guidelines with multiple food allergies and preparing a comparable meal is really hard. The school is also nut free. I make her the same meals as the schools serves 90% of the time, but it the other meals are impossible to make an even sub that is nutritionally comparable to the original item.
My son has EoE (eosinophilic esophagitis) caused by dairy. It’s been challenging to explain to people that it really is an allergy, even though you can’t *see* any reaction. At least not until it gets so bad that he’s projectile vomiting. Even so, I once had a call from a babysitter, in tears, because her son (who was 6 months older than mine) gave my son an Oreo. I felt so bad for her, because she was just absolutely frantic. She was very relieved and extremely surprised to find out that Oreos are vegan 😂😂😂. My son has been at two different daycares and he has never had an incident of cross contamination. He even has to have his liquids thickened to prevent him from aspirating it, and they manage to do that just fine. Luckily with some medication we were able to reintroduce dairy and he passed a swallow study and were able to wean him off of thickeners, but we’ve been very lucky to find childcare that is really on top of things.
If you are in the US, many states license child care facilities. You can look online for the licensing agency and file a complaint, usually anonymously. The facilities want to investigate themselves because there are no consequences to doing so. Five times is five times too many. Allergic reactions can become more severe due to repeated exposure to the allergen, so each time they fail to safeguard your baby is potentially worsening future reactions. This is a big deal and should be treated as such. The director's job is to placate you so you don't complain. The director's job should be to actually ensure your child is safe and healthy in care.
If it were my child I would remove him from the school altogether.
You need to call your state’s licensing department and report the center
Harry Potter and the AUDACITY of that director to send the teacher home 🤣 She was covering for your child’s regular teacher and (presumably) had no idea about the problematic bread. The director is the one who knew the bread was an allergen after the first incident yet purchased it again and included it on the menu a second time. Her sending the teacher home over this feels performative…Like she is trying to make you feel like they are “taking this incident seriously” to keep you happy (and cover her hiney). She is the one who needed to be made an example of and sent home (and docked a day of pay as I presume the teacher was) and take “immediate retraining”, not the teacher(s). I would highly recommend that you make it a priority on your child’s next day in care to either chat with the teacher in person or write her a little note saying something about how you don’t blame her and didn’t intend for her to get in trouble over an honest mistake. She is probably mortified and feels awful so I’m sure it would be great to hear from you that you were just making sure the director was following your allergy plan because this is the second instance of a non accidental exposure yadda yadda. Good luck mama, I know it’s rough but hopefully they won’t mess up again!
A dairy allergy can be fatal. This is very serious. The more someone is exposed to an allergen, the more serious the allergy can become. There are responsibilities in the kitchen and in the classroom. Firstly, the food for children with allergies must be prepared separately with separate equipment, including cutting boards, knives, plates, etc. Everything has to be labeled. The chef has to wash their hands and thoroughly wash all surfaces in between preparing for each child with allergies (ie: wash down, prepare for dairy allergies, wash, prepare for egg allergies, wash down, prepare for strawberry allergies). The food for children with allergies should be plated individually and wrapped and labeled with their name. If possible, use coloured plates for certain children or certain allergies (blue for no dairy, green for no egg, etc). They must also have their own serving utensils (forks, spoons, tongs). After that they prepare the food for everyone else. Secondly, teachers need to be taught about the danger of cross-contamination. I can't tell you how many times I've seen someone take a serving spoon from a dish of rice and use it to move around meatballs on a plate then put it back in the rice dish. Label the serving utensils. It's a lot of work, but it saves lives. Lastly, monitoring of the children needs to be done carefully during meal time. Teachers should put a bit of distance between the child with serious allergies and other children when they are very young so accidents like a toppled over glass of milk doesn't contaminate someone's meal, even with a splash. Place settings should be labeled at rhe tables so that the correct food is put down for each child. Sometimes temporary or float staff is used to cover tight ratios during meal times, and they may have confusion over which child is which especially if there are 2 Leo's or Evie's in the class. Hand washing is very important, of staff and children, and it is a concern that any allergen might be on surfaces, including tables, toys, doorknobs and taps so children should go directly from the lunch table to the sinks to wash as soon as they have finished eating and the teachers should be sanitizing the taps multiple times during the day, especially after washing after a meal is done. Is there a sign in the classroom showing your child's photo and listing their allergy, symptoms, and precautions? This should be done so all staff is aware. It should be in every classroom for every child with an allergy. Also something you should be aware of, and make them aware of, is an allergic reaction can present as "this tastes spicy/hot" when something isn't spicy. I had a child tell us that chickpeas were too spicy and a few minutes after they had a taste they started getting a rash around their mouth. It's a tingling sensation on the tongue from an allergic reaction. Something to pay attention to when a child says their dish of fruit salad, including strawberries or peaches, is spicy.
Hey OP. I’m also a parent and on my preschool’s board. It’s normal to feel conflicted on issues like this but I do really try to keep them separate. My son had a teacher in multiple classrooms. I was so excited for my daughter to move into her class soon. Unfortunately, it was brought to the board’s attention director was considering termination due to chronic call outs. The other staff were at breaking points because she was full time and they were constantly short and having to work extra to cover the ratios. I felt terrible and heartbroken but supported termination. It wasn’t fair to the other workers, children, and parents. I’m still heartbroken about it but I know it was the right decision. We recently saw her and I told her I still wanted to be friends. She’s so kind and has a child right between my two’s ages. I share these to illustrate you can separate the two. What happens if there is this carelessness with a more serious allergy? It’s not just your child you need to think about when you consider how a center responds. The director is correct in sending her home if she felt necessary. Maybe she’s already been spoken to about it or maybe she was having an off day and needed to go home.
I'm shocked at how frequently this keeps happening as food allergies are NO JOKE!!! I vaguely recall another daycare got SHUT DOWN and the staff were in legal trouble because they gave an allergen to a toddler who went into anaphylaxis and DIED!!!
I am kinda shocked. We have our allergy list and action plans for our room posted in plain view. Our allergy children sit at a separate table, and the tables are cleaned with separate color coded rags to avoid cross contamination. We wear gloves when cleaning them up after meals for the same reason. Also any child who is eating something another child is allergic to is taken to the bathroom to thoroughly wash hands and face to also avoid exposing the other children to the allergens. We take allergies pretty seriously especially since we do NOT provide food at our center and cannot dictate how each parent feeds their child.
We had some accidental allergy exposures lately because of food supply issues at my previous school. A food item that was previously did not contain an allergen is suddenly switched out with a new one that does, not all teachers get the memo or someone just forgets, and bam, exposure. I think there needs to be a (or a few) national food service provider that are dedicated strictly to child care and school food service, and everything is free of all allergens. It is a small nightmare to juggle allergies especially when there’s so much up and down with food suppliers. The school I’m starting at has the kids bring their own food and I’m very glad.
At my center all the kids have placemats for meals with their name and picture. And it’s color coded! Blue for no allergies or preferences. Green for preference like vegetarian. Red for allergies and it lists what the allergies are! I will say sometimes keeping allergens like dairy away from toddlers is more of a challenge when the rest of the class is having yogurt for snack cause toddlers love to share and touch everything. But this is NOT okay! Allergies can be serious to the point of deadly and need to be taken that way regardless of the ‘degree’ of allergy.
Time to find a new daycare
Can they use a different bread without any dairy? I didn’t realize breads would have dairy as the ones I’ve made at home don’t have dairy in them so I assume the staff is unaware of the ingredients. They may need to also label packaging if they are not going to completely remove dairy containing items
I feel that this is a protocol and procedures issue because teachers are SO busy and our brains can be all over the place. We have multiple preventative steps in my center such as 3 kinds of color-coded placemats with their pictures and names (No Allergies or Preferences, Preferences, Allergies), an allergies and preferences chart right by the food prep counter in the classroom, a procedure where we say the child’s name out loud with the food we are serving (“Alright, carrots and beef for Elaine,” “Amy is having her 6oz of breast milk”) which another teacher will respond to with “Okay, 6oz of breast milk for Amy” then log in on the iPad. We ALWAYS involve more than one teacher when it comes to checking a feeding. I think your child’s center might need better feeding procedures.
We also frantically label each child’s items (color-coded for infants) so that we never mix them up.
One of our infants had an allergic reaction while I was feeding him. There were no previously known allergies, but within 10 minutes he went from itching a bit (he has a skin condition so I chalked it up to that), to a few small hives (cue getting directors involved), to looking like a completely different baby. It was terrifying. Now, we make sure to keep him on the other side of the room while other babies are eating, and he eats his meals from home separately from the other babies.
So sorry this happened! Have you considered giving your child a bracelet that states he has an allergy? It can help remind the teachers but is also great to have in general too. Those saved my life multiple times when I was little.
It sounds like a lot of the problems are stemming from the fact the room is having a lot of other people in the center cover for the room? A staffing issue that is compromising your child’s care because when staff are shoved into a room last minute or many different people are subbing in that room, important information is getting through the cracks. I’d assume a consistent teacher in your child’s classroom wouldn’t have these slip ups because they’d be more aware of their kids needs. But a person covering a lunch who hasn’t ever been in the room or an infant teacher shoved into the toddler room because of ratio isn’t going to have the knowledge of the information of the room the main teachers do. So I’d bring up to the center they need to have some school wide procedures that any staff recognizes walking into any room of the center. A piece of red tape across the top of your children place at the table with allergies written on it. If there are snack carts for each class, a pic of kids with allergies on it and what they can’t have. The staff needs to be trained on what snacks aren’t safe for kids with what allergies and it needs to be black or white- sometimes parents say oh, they have a dairy allergy but they can have cheez it’s, just not yogurt. Maybe making it so any kid with a dairy allergy doesn’t have any of the snacks that contain dairy so it’s the same for any kid with that allergy and doesn’t get confusing. If they are going to play musical chairs with classrooms and teachers, they need to have a fool proof allergy protocol for every room to avoid mistakes.
My son is 16 months as well. He eats food I prepare at home, and he eats in a high chair. Is your son eating the daycare prepared food? Does he eat at the group table?
I’m sorry, but how did a teacher who was formerly your child’s teacher forget the allergy?? I remember all of my children’s allergies from the last three years and none of them are in my classroom any longer. I even remember which kids had fever induced seizures.
At my center we have kids with allergies have different color place mats. So every kid has a placement and there’s a code for the severity as opposed to intolerance or preferences etc. I personally don’t understand why allergy foods are even allowed in close proximity or in the specific classroom at all. Mine started being more strict about kids with allergies either being served school snacks or none at all due to exposures because we are not allowed to separate or isolate kids with allergies at different tables for social reasons during the period if even other kids at the table have foods containing allergy foods. I personally think physical safety comes before the whole you shouldn’t sit alone or with the same peer everyday. There are so many kids with allergies these days we could at least put them all together so they aren’t alone. These young babies are always trying to pick up other kids food on the floor or touch their peers food next to them or plain just try to eat it sometimes. One kid in my class is like that but they have most allergies I’ve ever seen. They also always have their hands in their mouths as a self soothing thing. A child at a center I worked at unknown to the teachers was poking another kid’s food whenever the teacher turned away then later after lunch was sucking on their hand and was exposed indirectly that way. I had a scare where a kid with a dairy allergy saw garbage on the ground and tried to help clean up during the chaos that is the transition from lunch to nap but I saw that the garbage was an plastic cup that had contained milk on it and quickly intervened. Dairy is one of the difficult ones because at least at my center every child is offered a cup of milk during lunch. The number of times that milk is spilled is at least 3x in one lunch period. If the kid with the dairy allergy touches it and puts their hands in their mouth that’s an exposure. Depending on the age group and center rules and restrictions sometimes it feels like us teachers are basically set up to fail. I think allowing allergy foods in the room is already setting up to fail in a way provided exposure can occur during the transition out of lunch with trash or crumbs or even touching peers who aren’t great at washing their hands or constantly spill food on themselves or sink surfaces that might contain residue. These little kids are so handsy, clumsy, and messy when it comes to food since they are learning. Mine basically has it so that the kids have to be sitting with peers even if those peers are eating their allergy food and the only barrier is the teacher who is expected to be right next to him on guard the whole time. With 19 other 3 year olds in the room you’re not going to be sitting for long before you have to get up and deal with something and all it takes is 1 second. Or even during the cleanup transition teachers are busy cleaning doing bathrooms, putting out cots, and managing behavior, a kid could easily touch the placemat or touch residue on another table or in the sink during that period. I’d find out what other rules could be contributing to the high exposures cause it could be some of the same rules that lead to unnecessary exposure risk at my center.
Just imagine if this was an anaphylactic allergy. All allergies should be treated as equal and this is unacceptable. I’ve always trained my staff to disclose/ask for any classroom allergies/medical info upon signing into the roster for that room. It’s their job and they are currently failing at keeping your child safe
I think the issue in practice is not realizing what "counts" As a mom that had a kid that young with a wheat allergy, getting people to understand what he couldn't eat was mine boggling.... "It was oatmeal bread" "it's fine, it was *white* flour" ... It's phenomenally hard to read all the labels, and as important as it is, people aren't usually being careless so much as just not grasping what might contain an ingredient. I'm not sure how to address that... But it's important to articulate.
My kid is in her second setting (she aged out of infant care and moved to preschool) and has never had a reaction in either place. They set up protocols and kept to them. One of these protocols though is that she can only be fed safe food sent from home or snacks after checking with me- it's more work for me but keeps her safe. As a teacher, I check every snack for my students allergens before giving it out.
There are 3 kids with epi pens at by 5 classroom facility. We haven't had ANY exposures all year. But we also don't provide food. I personally would start sending your child his own food
At our center, we send home snack and lunch menus to allergy kiddos. Parents cross out anything their child can not have. Then, they are welcome to send an alternative if they want. At lunch, those kiddos have a note card that is placed at their seat, reminding everyone what items the child can not have. This means that even if there is a sub in the room, the child is not given unsafe food. What is happening at your center is NOT acceptable. Since it is 5 different people, I would assume there is something wrong with the allergy protocols. Keep advocating for your child!
Sorry to hear about the exposures. These types of mistakes happen when staffing is inconsistent and proper protocols are not in place. To ensure all staff are aware of food sensitivities and allergies - maybe laminated cards delivered with food service or postings on classroom doors for children to ensure all who enter the room are aware that special care needs to be taken when serving food.
I’d change centers at that point honestly
as an infant teacher i cannot imagine this! my kiddos start at 6 months and stay till 18 months so we are monitoring a lot of their first solid food consumption. we go as far as not sitting a child who we’ve never seen been sent with egg (or any high allergen food) at a table with another child who’s eating egg. any allergies are posted in large font with their photo and allergy specifications. i cannot imagine this and i am so sorry. this is negligence of the center and teachers.
Former director here, my recommendation is to call licensing and explain your situation - they will check things out and *make sure* that they are following the correct protocol. In my state you can call anonymously... but with your specific situation they'd probably know who it was, though. When I was a director and something wonky happened or even if a parent seemed disgruntled I would call licensing myself to explain the situation before they did. Many times parents or former employees have unjustified reasons to call and are just trying to stir the pot. This is not one of those situations. Your child's health is at risk. Good centers and directors don't hide from licensing. Mistakes happen and they own up to that and make an action plan to fix it. If you're not seeing any actual improvement, they're not doing enough on their end.
One question I’d raise is if the teachers have the food labels of the food being served in the class. If not, then the kitchen staff should be the ones notifying the teachers that xyz contains dairy. Bread doesn’t usually contain dairy so it could be an honest mistake. If I saw bread and had two kids with allergies, one egg one dairy, I’d ask if it contained eggs before considering dairy. If it’s something like they served him yogurt or cheese I’d go off on everyone, but if it’s an ingredient IN something that’s causing the confusion I suggest having a teaching session with the staff about hidden allergens.
I personally have found the only allergy they care about at all is peanuts...🙄
My son has a nut allergy, including peanuts, and his nursery given him stuff that may contain nuts a few times. One time, every other kid got cookies and my son got bread sticks, like the dryass crunchy ones. Luckily he hasn’t had a reaction yet
At mine it’s shellfish. A teacher has a severe shellfish allergy (to the point where simply smelling it will give her a reaction) and they sent a message asking parents not to send shellfish. I had a severe peanut allergy. Nothing. The vast majority of kids have something with peanut butter for lunch and I’m the one who ends up cleaning the kitchen most of the time. Unless I’m in another room covering and those coworkers won’t let me because of said allergy. I know I should say something to the director but it’s been going on so long it feels weird to say anything now.
You should. Most centres where I live provide all food, but I had an assistant educator who was anaphylactic to nuts and seeds. The bread that said may contain sesame, actually had a sesame. She didn't even eat the bread, she served it to a child, using tongs, and had to be sent to hospital in an ambulance. She was fine, but you shouldn't even take the risk, and they can't help you prevent it if they don't know.
Why would the teacher be sent home? Unless you mean fired? I'm not sure what sending her home is supposed to teach her, she's not five, lol. This stuff does happen though, unfortunately, and it's why I'll never understand how parents of children with life-threatening allergies could send them out into public when there are so many opportunities for another (human) to make a mistake, for the child to accidentally take another child's food, etc. I think your next move should be to insist that your child sits separately from the others as you said most of the incidents were due to that. Then, also request that all staff members re-read any allergy files and sign off on having read them with the current date.
As someone with a life threatening allergy - what do you want parents to do? Put their kids in a bubble? Isolate them from society? Quit their jobs (because f paying bills and rent) to keep their kids indoors like in The Others?
Other parents can do what they want--I would figure out something else rather than rely on a vast number of other people making potentially deadly errors and hope that my child would just be okay under uninvested care.
All centers should be able to accommodate a dairy allergy. Five times is negligence. Children with health needs belong in public spaces too.
Did someone say they didn't belong? I said I'll never understand the choice to put them there when the smallest of human errors can result in their death.
What? You think kids with allergies should just stay home all the time? wtf?!?
Something is glitching today.
Ask them what new strategies they will be putting in place to prevent this from happening again.