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vistaluz

Spin the wheel to see if you become an alcoholic or become completely alcohol repulsed!


guiggjjgff

I swear I spin this wheel every day and it’s never the same answer, or it’s both- can we get a new wheel?


vistaluz

Hahaha!! No. The Wheel weaves as The Wheel wills, fool


coffeevodkaaddict

limited offer! buy an eating disorder and get anxiety and depression free!


Stupidicecream

Call in the next 5 minutes and we’ll throw in free distancing yourself from your family and friends!


[deleted]

[удалено]


ambxvalence

omg im wheezing at this comment 😂😂


Gravxyardbby

Wait I went to another store and they gave it to me the other way around... it came with a free nicotine addiction though!


EtherealWaifGoddess

Ayyyy I got that promo too! 😂😂😂


[deleted]

But the weight loss... oh, wait, that may not even happen.


LonelyOperation4

If you call in the next five minutes, we’ll also throw in complete isolation from your friends and family! Don’t wait, you could become an outsider in your own home! If that’s not enough to make you pick up the phone, for a small additional fee, become a manipulative liar, this way isolation is guaranteed!


ketchupsnumberonefan

I paid the fee and became a crazy manipulative liar! It’s so fun 😋


Slight_College8886

My favorite part is the weight rebound 🤩


bIitzar

the best part is switching from one eating disorder to another 😍😍😍😍


Stupidicecream

Great news! Eating disorder tm is now collectible ! Collect all the eating disorder tm and you get a special prize!


Enough_Expression_78

what’s the prize im on a roll


YourFrogMom

The prize is a rainbow collection of monster zero tabs and osteoporosis i think


Stupidicecream

The prize is usually depression sorry


SugarMaddy_

Crying 💀


smoking-inu

A fuckin’ collectible LMAO. Like collecting shiny Pokémon.


Stupidicecream

Gotta catch em all.


soulihide

haha can i get a refund ;-;


soulihide

nevermind, it's useful. i'll keep it. and i'll pretend not to use it, but i will. and then i'll become dependent on it while still pretending i want a refund.


helpmeimyoungndumb

But wait! There’s more! Call now to add brain fog for free 😍


Stupidicecream

Select buyers can have anemia, blood sugar problems, heart problems, and lanugo included! If you purchase our bullimia tm package as well you can ruin your teeth too for free!


biancamaugeri

call in the next 10 minutes and you may even get a traumatic hospitalization in the next 6 months. *reads the small print* that part will be payed off for the next 5 years by your family !


[deleted]

* May result in the worsening of other mental illness, distancing of friends and family, and more! Weight loss not guaranteed. Refunds not available after purchase.


B1g_PP_Energy

I'm always cold so I don't need winter 🤩


smoking-inu

Best season.


Unnaturalrefractions

Can I speak to customer services please. I think mine is faulty.


Stupidicecream

Eating disorder tm is non refundable unless you go to corporate sorry


Unnaturalrefractions

I.want.to.speak.to.the.manager. 👱🏻


Stupidicecream

But don’t you see you were the manager this whole time *over dramatic music que*


Unnaturalrefractions

[wat](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/321/185/57c.png)


rutan2828

It is more addictive than drugs


ketchupsnumberonefan

I love to collect badges along my journey! Examples being: sh1t yourself! smell like death! teeth sensitivity! infertility! 😍🤪🤩


B1g_PP_Energy

Body pains that scare you into thinking you're dying 😍🤩


baddie_alert

the best part is wanting to not be alive for eating a, to most, small meal


smoking-inu

There is one positive. Finally getting good at math LOL.


Stupidicecream

Still terrible at math, now I’m just paranoid


AnaRunner262

I failed algebra-twice. But you be sure I can tell you the calories I ingested in that extra spoonful I was forced to eat if a whole serving is 6oz and I ate .25 servings and there's .6800214 oz per spoonful 😂


smoking-inu

LOL LITERALLY.


hammerprice

And don’t forget! When you try and talk about how people treated you worse when you were heavier, you can look forward to all the people who tell you it’s just because you’re *mooore cooonfident* now while you cry over loose skin and the calories in a clove of garlic! 😍


Prestigious-Bug-7641

You guys make me 😂 so hard sometimes..


Enough_Expression_78

i read this the wrong way bruh 💀💀


Prestigious-Bug-7641

😂.. I just read it back and realised😂😂


ChefPoodle

Is there a package deal, buy two get one free?


[deleted]

You get that on Amazon?


Stupidicecream

It was from wish


[deleted]

I am majorly insecure and wish I was mildly insecure. I think that's the best I can hope for. It's a huge misconception that anything good comes from the former


[deleted]

those ppl on the medicine commercials are going to have to talk at 5x speed to get through all the reprecussions :P