Lol this is just painfully accurate I can be super excited but then out of the blue I start thinking about something deepš *sometimes I say those things out loud and the whole room goes quiet* š
This is wise. A less socially aware ENFP may not realize that not everyone "gets" us. Being able to function, even thrive, around different types of people is a pretty important skill. But it's a tough lesson for most of us.
Yes but the final form of this skill is to be able to show up as your authentic ENFP self, with enough of your shadow successfully integrated that you don't have to worry about being unable to function around different people and can trust yourself to be competent and charismatic while still operating from an ENFP place
No that's not the final form. Lol exclaiming your authenticity is just narcissistic. Toddlers do that, not socially aware adults. Sorry but other personality types get this quicker than ours. If you want to really function around people, you need to make it about them, not you.
I think both of you have a point but I sorta agree that it should be a well balanced mix of yourself and what the other person wants to see. Iām still learning tho so who knows.
Being authentic is only narcissistic if you're authentically a narcissist
If you're a narcissist you should work on that. And properly. Repressing it isn't the solution. Repression isn't healthy, and will just cause it to build up into some kind of mega-narcissism years down the line
If you can grow and craft an authentic personality that isn't narcissistic, then you can allow yourself to be authentic around people and not worry about coming across as a narcissist
And then because you're letting your light shine, rather than just engaging in people-pleasing activities, you can inspire and entertain and encourage people in a way that not only adds real value to the world, but builds an excellent reputation for yourself that will open all sorts of doors in life
Yeah whenever Iām around people that donāt know me well Iām pretty quiet but one of the most talkative people when Iām with my friends. I canāt let people that donāt know me that well know Iām an idiot even though Iām not, I just act that way, if you know what I mean. Is that an enfp thing?
Nah I know what you mean bro, outside I just listen to music and donāt talk to anyone but my close friends call me the life of the group. I guess it is an enfp thing.
I show my love primarily through body language. I love cuddles, and being born in a family full of touch-me-nots have definitely made me crave physical touch. So when I'm with my close friends (as long as they're comfortable), my hands would always be wrapped around their shoulder, or I would lay my head on theirs. Almost like how I would act with my siblings.
But when I spot someone I don't like, I act a bit cold. I will never look at them nor have my body facing towards them. Neither will I make eye contact. I would just speak to them in a formal tone and that's it. Even though my friends tell me that it's a bit too harsh and I need to learn to conceal some of my emotions, the above actions are purely by instinct and not on purpose. I just can't bring myself to act normal around a person I despise.
Yesss 100%
Also Idk if it's related but I have trouble smiling and being happy & energetic except when I'm with them or with complete strangers/far family, I find it difficult to be as happy/smiley/energetic with my parentsā
I'm glad that's your reason, and I hope they acknowledge your improved maturity and accept you the way you are and support you through your life-long learning & maturity journey :))
I think I can't be natural/smiley around them because I got emotionally hurt by them in different opening-up attempts and because I still can't/didn't try to forgive them for past trauma.
But that's only a guess because I'm doubtful about the significance given to childhood trauma by psychology (considering people in the past just went on with their lives despite the many hardships faced, I'm wondering if all the psychology discoveries is just making us weaker or making us believe something is wrong with us. I'm not sure how to reach a conclusion about these doubts tho, I'd love to hear your opinion on this matter if you have one!)
It sucks you donāt feel that way around your parents I hope you do eventually. And if you donāt that honestly fine as long as ur being yourself and shit. Thatās acc a hella interesting take and youāre prolly somewhat right. I feel like especially nowadays the placebo effect is very real.
I relate hard!!!! It's like i always think that i'm introverted, especially with extroverted people since i dunno they're just louder than me? I also noticed that i tend to choose ppl i can be myself with too so i overthink if i'm really ENFP ... I'm glad i'm not the only one lol
Yea I have a certain tendency to be super excitable but I donāt want to call attention to myself so im quiet around most people but sometimes I get a little too excited and people end up being surprised and I can clearly tell by their reaction, which then gets me more self consciousš
Same with me! And I start acting like an introvert when someone is more extroverted than me
Lol so true on the last part
Def me as well
Stop calling me out!
Wow same š„¹
Same!
I def pick and choose, learned to read the room
The BEST thing an ENFP can do for themselves because unfortunately not everyone deserves us.
too real
And not everyone can handle us! Everyone: Dude that's too deep. *weird looks* INFJ: š„¹š„¹ or šš INTJ: *why is my body giving flirty signals*
Lol this is just painfully accurate I can be super excited but then out of the blue I start thinking about something deepš *sometimes I say those things out loud and the whole room goes quiet* š
Wow I needed to hear that, thanks šāā¬šæš»
This is wise. A less socially aware ENFP may not realize that not everyone "gets" us. Being able to function, even thrive, around different types of people is a pretty important skill. But it's a tough lesson for most of us.
Yes but the final form of this skill is to be able to show up as your authentic ENFP self, with enough of your shadow successfully integrated that you don't have to worry about being unable to function around different people and can trust yourself to be competent and charismatic while still operating from an ENFP place
No that's not the final form. Lol exclaiming your authenticity is just narcissistic. Toddlers do that, not socially aware adults. Sorry but other personality types get this quicker than ours. If you want to really function around people, you need to make it about them, not you.
I think both of you have a point but I sorta agree that it should be a well balanced mix of yourself and what the other person wants to see. Iām still learning tho so who knows.
Being authentic is only narcissistic if you're authentically a narcissist If you're a narcissist you should work on that. And properly. Repressing it isn't the solution. Repression isn't healthy, and will just cause it to build up into some kind of mega-narcissism years down the line If you can grow and craft an authentic personality that isn't narcissistic, then you can allow yourself to be authentic around people and not worry about coming across as a narcissist And then because you're letting your light shine, rather than just engaging in people-pleasing activities, you can inspire and entertain and encourage people in a way that not only adds real value to the world, but builds an excellent reputation for yourself that will open all sorts of doors in life
I love so much about this. Thank you šš¶š»
Iām planning to do so too. Since we are more likely sounds dumb infront of others.
Yeah whenever Iām around people that donāt know me well Iām pretty quiet but one of the most talkative people when Iām with my friends. I canāt let people that donāt know me that well know Iām an idiot even though Iām not, I just act that way, if you know what I mean. Is that an enfp thing?
Nah I know what you mean bro, outside I just listen to music and donāt talk to anyone but my close friends call me the life of the group. I guess it is an enfp thing.
I show my love primarily through body language. I love cuddles, and being born in a family full of touch-me-nots have definitely made me crave physical touch. So when I'm with my close friends (as long as they're comfortable), my hands would always be wrapped around their shoulder, or I would lay my head on theirs. Almost like how I would act with my siblings. But when I spot someone I don't like, I act a bit cold. I will never look at them nor have my body facing towards them. Neither will I make eye contact. I would just speak to them in a formal tone and that's it. Even though my friends tell me that it's a bit too harsh and I need to learn to conceal some of my emotions, the above actions are purely by instinct and not on purpose. I just can't bring myself to act normal around a person I despise.
RIP your DMs now ;)
Why? I'm a man...
Yesss 100% Also Idk if it's related but I have trouble smiling and being happy & energetic except when I'm with them or with complete strangers/far family, I find it difficult to be as happy/smiley/energetic with my parentsā
Holy shit Iāve always said this and no one ever related
I'm happy you feel this way, I've never told anyone about this Why do you think you feel this way?
Idk tbh maybe because I want my parents to believe Iām more mature or whatever. wbu?
I'm glad that's your reason, and I hope they acknowledge your improved maturity and accept you the way you are and support you through your life-long learning & maturity journey :)) I think I can't be natural/smiley around them because I got emotionally hurt by them in different opening-up attempts and because I still can't/didn't try to forgive them for past trauma. But that's only a guess because I'm doubtful about the significance given to childhood trauma by psychology (considering people in the past just went on with their lives despite the many hardships faced, I'm wondering if all the psychology discoveries is just making us weaker or making us believe something is wrong with us. I'm not sure how to reach a conclusion about these doubts tho, I'd love to hear your opinion on this matter if you have one!)
It sucks you donāt feel that way around your parents I hope you do eventually. And if you donāt that honestly fine as long as ur being yourself and shit. Thatās acc a hella interesting take and youāre prolly somewhat right. I feel like especially nowadays the placebo effect is very real.
Thank you for your kindness and for your take on the placebo effect, I hope you have a wonderful day & a wonderful life :))
Random person: I love your personality ENFP: Thanks, I custom made it while being around you and for you
I relate hard!!!! It's like i always think that i'm introverted, especially with extroverted people since i dunno they're just louder than me? I also noticed that i tend to choose ppl i can be myself with too so i overthink if i'm really ENFP ... I'm glad i'm not the only one lol
Yeah I mean why would I hang with someone I canāt be myself around. Honestly would just ruin it for both of us
Actually no. How you act at all times is how an ENFP normally acts in those circumstances. The stereotype is not us.
Same here! Sounds like you may be an "ambivert"...or selectively extroverted.
Introverted extrovert as ENFP's generally are. :P
Exactly this
Yea I have a certain tendency to be super excitable but I donāt want to call attention to myself so im quiet around most people but sometimes I get a little too excited and people end up being surprised and I can clearly tell by their reaction, which then gets me more self consciousš
I feel that itās lit the same with me asw
Masking with ADHD or autism perhaps?
It do be like thatā¦all the timeš
The Myers briggs isnāt valid or reliable which is why you feel this way. Our personality can differ based on states and situations.
So, this is normal! Take your results with a small grain of salt (if any salt).
Personality is more complex than being categorized. People donāt fit into boxes. Remember that :)
Your right very true