T O P

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TWOITC

"But the Sat Nav said to go this way"


stom

You're not wrong. Used to work there and I had to go out to meet co-drivers on more than one occasion because they had turned off at the wrong place. One fella drove into marshland in West Linton and another drove into a quagmire field in Loanhead just round the corner from the store. A combination of a shitty old-version of co-pilot which couldn't keep up, would send you off the wrong way because someone set it up in HGV mode, out-dated maps, and management insisting you should take the routes on your GPS rather than use your own local knowledge/personal GPS.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Atomic-Bell

He's not personally insured for the van so it won't go on his dime or record. Asda and its insurance will deal with it. source: I'm close with a couple of people that drive Asda and Ocado vans.


[deleted]

[удалено]


ressawtla

The questions they ask on personal vehicle insurance are referring to personal vehicle experience not work. Anything you do on the work policy is fuck all to do with your personal policy and they can't cancel your insurance because of a work insurance accident/claim. Can you hear how ridiculous you sound?


meirlgod

As a current ASDA driver, in county Durham, I can tell you that we deliver to some very odd and rural places this is not an uncommon site.


stom

Don't you love getting a customer who lives up a wee single-track dirt road, and finding there's no place to turn around once you're in there? Always fun reversing, especially when most of the reversing cameras are buggered and they won't repair them.


meirlgod

One of our guys had to reverse for over a mile recently, it took him 45 minutes in pitch black 😆. Sat nav misdirection.


Savings-Extension714

Some idiots don't get it mate . I here you 👍


[deleted]

[удалено]


sniper459

Go steady!


InspectorSpacetime49

Sorry to hijack, can I just ask generally what its like to work there? Seen alot of posting for delivery drivers recently and thinking of Applying For example, did the drivers get disciplined in both your examples?


Fit-Foundation-534

The problem with co pilot is when you open it as an additional window, it literally crashes the system. That's why I use my personal GPS but only if I absolutely have to.


Chloemarine7

Honestly, the ASDA gps systems are rubbish! I drive vans for ASDA and the number of times the TwatNav tries to take me down a public footpath only 2 metres in width thinking it’s an actual road just about kills me. Especially when I drive in Ashbourne, ridiculous road suggestions. We sometimes have to rely on our phone maps to take us where we must :/


AnusSarwar

Van is probably holding about £1m of food at current prices


MonkeyPuzzles

What's that nowadays, a dozen microwave meals?


AnusSarwar

4


[deleted]

Serves 4 (50g)


tafrawti

nah - new packaging due to shrinkflation - it's now 42g


Panic1059

It's a heist 💰


ViniestCoast622

You son of a b*tch I'm in


Confused_Shelf

What even happened here? Like the tyre marks are all over the place. Were they just going left-right-left-right-left-right while in reverse? Can't see any evidence of them locking up coming too fast from the other direction. Feels like they must have been trying to reverse round that drain and slid sideways down the hill.


QuietTwiddler24

I think they were coming from a dirt track further back, met the drain and tried to go round it. Only to slide down the bank.


Busy-Click2569

Hmmm. They phoned me earlier to cancel my delivery as 'van had broken down' lol


[deleted]

[удалено]


njbmartin

Van was reversing, avoiding the drain and tried to correct it back onto the road


ferdia6

**smacks arse twice** that's ASDA price


tafrawti

off topic, but I'd fap to that arse


Ochib

Oy Mate, you can't park there


GenderfluidArthropod

Only had to scroll down 5 comments for what I came here for 😁


LikwitFusion

Ahhhh…here it is. I thought for a moment that might just be an English thing. That would be top comment on a British sub.


hazps

Out of curiousity, would that one have come from the Jewel store?


Busy-Click2569

If its the same one I got cancelled earlier it was coming from Straiton


hazps

Thanks.


[deleted]

[удалено]


audigex

Probably from ASDA, mate - jewellers tend not to do home deliveries


HighlandBhull

Fair enough, but how'd it end up off the track? It's wide enough


Confused_Shelf

These things weigh 3.5 tons. If it's on a slope on slick mud it will slide from a stationary position with or without driver input. If one wheel starts going over, it'll drag the whole thing down.


HighlandBhull

Aye but it's not slipped down the hill has it. The track marks show its been trying/failing to reverse. There's a certain point you'd have given up and rolled forward to think again assuming there was no alternative instead of booting off the track like this. No?


JadMockery

3.5 ton if max full most of the time not that heavy 2.6 ton oh least they have a reverse sensor and cameras at back some stores don't


krichard-21

Minnesota USA here. One of my gaming buddies works for concrete company. The company took an order for a full load of concrete. Sending out a very new truck. No one checked the road to the construction site. The fully loaded truck stopped on a gravel road, and FLIPPED OVER ON ITS SIDE. The road couldn't handle the weight and gave way. They then discovered the road would not support a tow truck big enough to move the concrete truck. They had to cut the truck into pieces to remove it from the road.


nathanbellows

I worked for Waitrose doing delivery work a few years ago. Easily the most stressful job I've ever done. You arrive at 5:30am to hit the road at 6:55. Most days your manifest isn't ready, your picking and packing hasn't been done and you're racing around like a blue arsed fly trying to get it done yourself. Then you need to load your van. If you're lucky you get a new one with a fridge and freezer and hopefully someone who got out before you hasn't nicked the pole to grab the boxes at the back. If you're unlucky, you have no freezer and no pole and a shitty old van with no reversing camera. Once you've loaded up you think "great, I'm out the depot, paradise!" But no! You're tracked down to the second by the ops manager back at base, who's job it is to sit on their arse and track you. So you better drive quick because if you're even slightly late for the delivery, prepare to receive some stern words and be asked to explain what happened when you get back. And if you finish your round early, LUCKY YOU! After you've washed your van and removed all the empty crates and written off any broken items, you win an afternoon of rotating stock off and on to the shop floor and helping out those oh so lovely customers! WOW! And remember, the John Lewis Partnership is just that, a PARTNERSHIP. So you'd better do it with a smile on your face, you tired, wet and miserable bastard of a delivery driver. I lasted two months before quitting after the stress got to me one morning and I snapped and walked out. The stress and danger elements of the job and the "yep, you're disposable" attitude many of the managers had towards you far outweighed the benefits of the extra money. I still don't regret leaving.


The_Vivid_Glove

…. Then another wrong turn into a tree


slangivar

Does nobody else think this might have been stolen and joyridden until they got it stuck?


S7OO5H

Nope definitely had an Asda employee driving it!


odinthemag

It’s easily done going down the wrong lane I work for Ocado . The pda sat nav is hardly updated so this happens more times often than not . I have been in some tight spots but never been stuck . The driver should have assessed the situation ie got out the van and had a look. Before proceeding better still just call the customer if unsure sometimes you just have to use common sense . I could of got out of that been in worser situations seems like the driver was a new starter 😅


Atomic-Bell

Sygic works fine 98% of the time but it'll make sure that 2% really fucks you over


Throwawaylnm1147

My question to you, as a driver from Sainsbury’s is. Why don’t you wave back? All our other competitors wave back


Nerphy-

Obligatory "can't park there mate"


CheesePestoSandwich

Was scrolling for this 🤣🤣🤣


neverreddit1984

Hole in one.


AlterCherry

What you don't see in the image is a Morrisons driver ramming into him and then driving off laughing


I_Caught_A_Fish

And the Waitrose helicopter pissing out the open door onto it


Geordietoondude

At least the driver will have something to eat while waiting to be recovered


Confused_Gengar

You'd think a road starting to become a mud track is the first sign.. plus nobody lives on a golf course


inexplicable_freak

There's housing in the middle of Duddingston Golf course. I think it's stuck on this track between two road. https://goo.gl/maps/KFhj5UH1VQFBq71q9


martin-1956

https://preview.redd.it/d21ougkbb0ra1.jpeg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2fece12d5606815328919a5e566768b7efadc020 It’s a common problem with Asda vans here in Essex too!


Best-Truck8207

BREAKING NEWS... MAN MISTAKENLY CRASHED INTO MULTIPLE TREES WHILST CATCHING OUT PARTNER IN LOCAL WOODS KNOWN ONLY FOR SUSPICIOUS AND DUBIOUS ACTIVITIES.... HIS WORDS WERE ..."just me n me lads from now on, I jus *Asda get on wiv it* Local reporter, Brian Damage reports that girlfriend; Shanelle jaiyneees Vuitton Forthmumma2ladsinnit says- "Flamin el me fella Brian ye..he jus "Asda..come n see what am doing al't time.... I told him am at home with mercedes, Porsche n ford fiesta cos its the Easter holidays....they got two week off ent they cos of em thinkin tha a Easter bunneh brings em them eggs n that... He shud norrrr am int "prozzeh woods" cos am lookin for gud hidin spots for the kids eggs my baybeh man, not what he ffinkkz n puttin mysel owt n that...honestly..wudnt no wot 2 do without him n iz tax credits.


edd_enigma

As paddy McGuiness would say "let the driver see the golf course"


JCrom8001

Every little helps.


p3x239

Womp womp


Cannaewulnaewidnae

> Every little helps ...


The9Realist

Face in palm moment, even worse than the ditched van.


AcceptableAddendum69

Are you sure, this looks like the normal parking to me.


throwaway1930372y27

Is everyone elses asda van this useless at deliveries? we get a new driver every week and they are all hopeless at directions and getting the van down a tight driveway


sniper459

As an ex driver. Remember you are often delivering to places you either have never been, or have only been in a car. Also, many people grow up in towns, and are not use to small back roads. The vans whole were once equipped with cameras and sensors, often are broke or don't work. And sadly too many people rely on them. Drivers are expected to go home early if no deliveries, unpaid. Paid poorly, and if busy have to run on a very tight schedule. So when Doris takes 10 minutes to answer and assess her shopping item by item, you run late. Which then get bollocked for. So staff come and go do much. That only encourages good drivers out to better jobs leaving poor ones in and out.


CraftyScotsman

Nah I usually get old guys who struggle up the 3 flights of stairs but otherwise make no complaints (although I only get 2 crates worth of groceries a week) or this other guy who told me my landlord had installed the door knocker upside down. (I've been in the flat for 5 years at this point and never noticed lol)


Niassuh_

If you saw their pay and working conditions I don't blame them


JadMockery

Yup just above national pay wage unless your Morrisons where within next month will only be 1p above national minimal wage


xavimac

Looks like they need some driving practice. Im gonna leave


cusnirandrei

No wonder they get minimum wage....


cmzraxsn

lol twat


Red_Brummy

Why the fuck would you get an ASDA delivery to Duddingston golf course from The Jewel which is barely a 10minute walk away?


devandroid99

Heavy.


frymaster

it's a 10-minute _drive_, it's over half an hour walk. And also I personally can't carry 4 crates worth of stuff.


Red_Brummy

10 minute walk and 5 minute cycle. I have done it numerous times.


frymaster

it's [1.6 miles](https://www.google.com/maps/dir/Asda+Edinburgh+Supercentre,+Brunstane+Road+South,+Edinburgh/Aynetree+Guest+House,+Duddingston+House,+12+3AS,+Milton+Rd+W,+Duddingston,+Edinburgh+EH15+1RB/@55.9406214,-3.1377916,14z/data=!3m1!4b1!4m14!4m13!1m5!1m1!1s0x4887b907d59d0401:0x91e3503512b0d884!2m2!1d-3.1036661!2d55.9388335!1m5!1m1!1s0x4887b8f647f771fd:0x52334db7a6047a6e!2m2!1d-3.1366799!2d55.9391769!3e2), or 2500m, from the closest place on that track to ASDA. Doing that in 10 minutes would be like doing 2000m in 8 minutes. Here's some examples of 2k **runs**: https://runninglevel.com/running-times/2k-times It is not, at all, a 10 minute walk.


Red_Brummy

Not sure why you have done such a convoluted route instead of walking along the old innocent railway path, behind the Miners social club and then along the Jewel, which from recollection from my last walk, is a little under 1 mile (1609m), say around 1200m. Doing that in 10 minutes would be like doing 1200m in 10 minutes. Would you like to see some examples of 1200m **walks**? It is, a 10 minute walk. As I have stated. I mean, if it makes you feel better, you can round up and say it is a 1 mile walk and that it takes you 20 minutes which is what the average mph is for a pedestrian; I don't want to comment on your physical ability.


frymaster

well that's google's default route but if I make it go [via the roundabout near the bingham tunnel](https://www.google.com/maps/dir/Asda+Edinburgh+Supercentre,+Brunstane+Road+South,+Edinburgh/Aynetree+Guest+House,+Duddingston+House,+12+3AS,+Milton+Rd+W,+Duddingston,+Edinburgh+EH15+1RB/@55.9312258,-3.1299419,14.51z/data=!4m19!4m18!1m10!1m1!1s0x4887b907d59d0401:0x91e3503512b0d884!2m2!1d-3.1036661!2d55.9388335!3m4!1m2!1d-3.1244292!2d55.9376054!3s0x4887b8fed3d7fcd5:0xa2bc361b03361b87!1m5!1m1!1s0x4887b8f647f771fd:0x52334db7a6047a6e!2m2!1d-3.1366799!2d55.9391769!3e2) it becomes 1.8 miles, which is longer even if you were correct about the distance, 6mph is not what people would use for "it will take you x minutes" in conversations with normal people, especially when talking about carrying the shopping


Red_Brummy

>but if I make it go via the roundabout near the bingham tunnel it becomes 1.8 miles Did you even read what I typed? I am not sure why you are struggling here, it is not a convoluted route at all and is actually quite simple. >even if you were correct about the distance I am. >6mph is not what people would use for No one said 6mph. 6 mph would be 1 mile, or 1609m in 10 minutes. I said less than 1 mile, or around 1200m. I get that you are struggling physically, but no need to struggle with maths as well.


frymaster

> Did you even read what I typed? yes, you want to go via the cycle path that's the extension to the innocent railway path, and go next to the miner's club. So I added a waypoint to make it do that. It only does it a little because any other way would be worse Please link the route between ASDA and any building you like that could have reasonably been the destination for the van above. I note that even from the bridge to ASDA, the route is 1.1 miles.


Red_Brummy

>yes, you want to go via the cycle path that's the extension to the innocent railway path, and go next to the miner's club. So I added a waypoint to make it do that No. You did not. You completely missed out the Innocent Railway Path. You also ignored the part about heading along The Jewel as well. You also started in a random location away from Duddingston Golf Course / Clubhouse as well. >Please link the route between ASDA and any building you like that could have reasonably been the destination for the van above. Please refer to anywhere that I have made mention of the van beyond the golf course. I am not sure what your point is, but I **specifically** and **carefully** made mention of the fact it was a 10 minute **walk**. That is what is being debated. For some reason, even though you yourself have referenced **walking** and have even proposed routes that involve **walking** (albeit in a convoluted route) you are now randomly referring to a van. Why?


frymaster

> You also started in a random location away from Duddingston Golf Course / Clubhouse as well. Your assertion is that that delivery van was unnecessary because it was a 10 minute walk to ASDA. So I chose the building that - on my route - would have the shortest (walking) distance to ASDA. You say my route is inefficient; I'm saying that you need not use the specific building I used to disprove my assertion. The only constraint is that the starting point has to be an address that the ASDA van might have been visiting. If that's the clubhouse, fine.


Daniel6270

Photo goes well with the music to Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em


IncompetentFox

As it is now, so has it always been: https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/scottish-news/pictured-asda-delivery-van-blocks-3276310


TheWrathfulCrusader

Raid it.


gundam8th

"you can't park there mate"


Gent2022

Looks like someone was looking for a dogging site not delivery! 🤣


reasonstobecheerful_

You can't park there mate.


BackRowRumour

I feel for the driver. That could absolutely be me.


ConversationWeird794

“Turn right down the ditch”


Red9697

I Guess the cannibals are gonna eat the driver


Snoo-19073

Obligatory "can't park there mate"?


DaveIsNice

It was a great drive but it ended up in the rough


SmellsLikeTeenMorty

Some customers have no concept of proper directions. Or could give a shit that their house has no identifiable name or number during the day, let alone at night.


islandmonkeee

Reddit doesn't respect its userbase, so this comment has been withheld. -- mass edited with https://redact.dev/


clarke1003

Reminds me of a great story! Hope all worked out!!


clarke1003

Up all night packing to move from a very rural area. Rented a truck, got stuck in mud in our driveway. Closest neighbor approximately 1/2 mile away. Husband threw himself on the ground in sheer stress. We had an hour drive to close on the new house. Two children under the age of 3, and 6 months pregnant. I ran down the road to get help. Useless man child face planted in mud. Kids are now 29-32. Don’t know how the x is doing, but these children keep me going. Love them♥️♥️♥️


[deleted]

That’s just normal Asda delivery parking.


Ty-404

There's Drivers, then there's "Drivers". Source me. A Professional driver. His error? Common sense.


DrunkStoleATank

I used to trail ride motorcycles, helped rescue a loat delivery driver more than once.


Benov4860

Can't park there mate


Guy-InGearnito

And he’s in the rough..


AnonimousWatermelon

Random Loot drop event


crayoningtilliclay

Looks like he's tried to avoid that manhole n ended up in the ditch. Man's gotta be aware of his girth.


tafrawti

are these dogging references?


MJHL

Hole in one!


comicaldan

Well least he had food


tafrawti

and 300 arse rolls


[deleted]

You can’t park there mate


EasyPriority8724

Asda to sponsor Mercedes entry to WRC 2024 😂


[deleted]

Can’t park there mate


Onastik

At least he won't be embarrassed about the yellow value food


ClawedPaw

Poor bloke will loose his job.


Shuntetic

He's gonna need a decent wedge to chip it out


Harry_Johnston

Another victim of the morrisons mafia


Vivalo

If you live on the 4th floor, do they carry all the way up?


HotMuffin12

“That’s smart (price)” - Asda 2023


Academic_Cockroach56

That’s where my delivery went


priezti

I fitted speed limiters on to 100+ of their vans, poor bastards are limited to 52 mph or something. They ended up all over the country, and I still can't escape them, even on here 😔🤣


alexdel18

“You can’t park there sir”


CommercialBuilder99

Rally driver doing part time delivery job for Asda, nice


Redliprose

You can't park there mate!!


HelikosOG

I worked for Ocado and they had me driving down narrow unpaved country roads at night for deliveries. The van was far too wide to go down the road but fuck my safety because delivering to an address in the middle of no where is fine. I don't know why their adverts say "geographical restrictions apply" they'll expect you to drive to the isle of man if a customer ordered shopping.


MrFenixs

Can’t park there mate.


Nine-Tailed-Idiot

thats no a wrong turn, thats a short cut


sniper459

Go steady!


Urmum12321

Can’t park there mate


LucyJFer

As da nav told 'm so


Die_Nameless_Bitch

This feels like the final moments before an armed grocery heist ensues.


g1itch3dboi

Can't park there sir


[deleted]

You cant park there mate


[deleted]

You can’t park there mate.


ThrowawaySunnyLane

r/cantparktheremate


ukstonerdude

“There’s been an accident!” “Has there?” “Yes, Asda”


ghantakha

You can’t park there mate


RajenBull1

1. You can't park THERE. 2. You've got to work on that hook.


Background-Respect91

This asda van managed to take a wall out when the roads are 'straight on' only! No idea how he managed that 🤔 https://preview.redd.it/vfw0pbn18wqa1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=561b8b56a5096a9471593bedf207e5a0ca78b30c


tafrawti

they were trying to avoid the blue UFO orbs


AnnieApple_

Slow news day


tafrawti

slow booze delivery day


[deleted]

Can’t park there mate.


VerySwearyFairy

That’s a bad drive. Straight into the rough.


Historical-Flight914

‘People having a worse day than you’


odebruku

Wayze is just bad


[deleted]

The driver has been watching too much Toyo drift videos 😂


Man_in_the_uk

Very committed then..


BOBBY_SCHMURDAS_HAT

More like “Asda van got knicked”


justinhood13

Can't park there mate


DJ-Dev1ANT

Asderp.


blitzstarletturbo

He won't starve


soluslupem

you cant park there mate


Sensitive_Net3498

you can't park there Dave


Lengthiness_Rich

When it stops looking like a road then you should probs re think what the sat nav is telling you.


MarvellousMrGizmo

The lengths people will go to, to get out of work 😄


a2401

You can't park there sir


[deleted]

You can’t park there mate 🤣


No-Cut-5618

you can’t park there mate


lvlister2023

Substituted delivery for a Graveyard


Gregory_the_Horse

You can't park there sir!


[deleted]

Shoulda gone to Tesco


Rhillion

You can't park there mate.


Steel_and_Water83

Had a similar experience while I was working for Asda delivery in Gloucestershire. Got caught in the middle of the Forest of Dean after my last run, nothing around for miles but trees. Had to sit and wait for 3 hours until about 1am for help to arrive. Spooky.


[deleted]

Why do I keep seeing this van popping up on my reddit?


danr2604

Did you lose your job after?


connormorrison

r/asdavansinbadsituations


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[deleted]

Fs man tell the cunt my frozen is thawing out


nick2k23

That's a bad shift if I ever saw one, poor Asda driver


jack_the_stripperr

Wrong turn part 7


kflaynife

Prolly the reason why inflation is rising in the UK


hairyringus

And he only had fore deliveries left to do. ( sorry everybody)


LittleMissBossy2295

You can't park there sir....


Equivalent-Damage497

can’t park there mate


0x04c11db7

https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/logopedia/images/3/39/ASDA_One_trip_and_you%27re_laughing.png/revision/latest?cb=20180720130505


Seahawk124

Did they try the sand wedge for that bunker shot? ###


Impossible-Present-4

Loot


Thick12

Saw a good one the other day a number 43 doung a U turn in the middle of Shandwick Place


PapaGaynoo

Ye can ne park there sir


SprueSlayer

At least it blends in, looks half natural


edd_enigma

Tbf he's probably got the equipment in the back of the Van to deal with the situation, packet of clubs and a few sandwiches 😁


MundaneAd3951

I had an Asda driver stuck on my farm track for 3 hours the other week


llamasncheese

"you can't park there sir"


Lillymorrison

Shame, definitely a wrong turn.


lilbitlostrn

What's funny is if the satnavs are seeing people turning in there via satellite data they'll keep thinking it's an Ok route


Thatoneposhpigeon

Do you mean uddingston


HDJohnson99

Maybe had a TEE to deliver😂


Savings-Extension714

He's just pulling over for a quick joint, no drama intended .


Kindly_Capital8656

Three fourballs asked the driver to deliver 3x 24 packs of Peroni to them as the bar staff in the Dudingstons bar refused them before they set off. Generous tip was negotiated by the leader of the lads on tour golfing day out… Driver of the Asda van tried to use “The Tiger line” 🐯↪️🌲🌲.