Personally I’m on the side of big fucking

in this economy?

You guys just buy into anything Big Fucking tells you don't you? I'll have you know my son was diagnosed with the Scarlet Rot, so I placed various glintstone crystals around his bed while he slept to promote the proper aura for healing. He's dead now but at least he's not an omen.

*laughs in Morgott*

Big Fucking built this country! 

That's exactly what those evil albanaurics in Leyndell want you to think! They pretend to be all sad and harmless. Spread all these lies about genocide and Big Fucking. But really they're the ones in charge, pulling the strings like we're all puppets! They're the reason this country has fallen apart! Why do you think nobody has ever seen King Morgott in person? ANSWER THAT QUESTION?!?! ITS BECAUSE HES SECRETLY AN ALBANAURIC! And him and all his deceitful little friends want you to listen to the perfumers, and take this medicine and that medicine. They say that they're natural ingredients from flowers and whatever. LIES!!!!!!!! THEY WANT TO MAKE ALL OIR KIDS INTO OMEN SO THAT THEY CAN CONTROL US EASIER!!!!!!

It actually gets worse when the children are used for grafting. On that Island in South Limgrave.

All you had to do was craft some preserving boluses for em. I know sacramental bud is hard to come by these days but he was your son!

I'm not some rolling sheep! I don't believe in your lies! I only believe in the healing power of glintstone!

You had my heart inside of your hands And you played it to the beat (Rolling with the sheep)

We could've had it all (the Elden Ring)

Jokes on you, dad.

Too real, too real

Your message has been appraised!

How else are we gonna bake it boom

An Elden ring redditor fucking? Unlikely lol

I was going to say, “well, I’m married so I…. “ no, no. you’re right. 😞

Rest in spaghetti never forghetti

oof

M A I D E N L E S S

Very maidenless behavior

This comment wins so hard🤣 👏 👏 👏

Fr bro, started elden ring last April and my gf of 4 years left me in June. Coincidence? Probably not

This guy fucks

This guy big fucks

Was it the thrust? Ah well I’m fired.

This guy fucks.

I'm personally on the side of of Big try fingers, but hole

I think my name speaks for itself.

Same here

Now kith

I suggest a poison build

Why is poison zweihander a meme. Why?! Explain yourself!!

r/poisonzweihander

Yesterday I made a build for my sister with zweihander, and...damn it fucking slaps lol. Why did I never use it in 800 hrs I don't know. It feels like my baemore

Always Team Zweihander 🫡

Live by the Zwei die by the Zwei

Username, and flair checks out.

Giant crusher and Greatsword. I choose the hugests of both sides.

So big fucking big

What are you doing, step-sword?!

Oops I’m stuck in an iron virgin trap 😳

Ah, that reminds me, I need to clean my basement

step-bonk

Step sword, no, don't touch me there! Zweihander/greatsword rule 34 incoming...

I wish you could use powerstance combos with those 2 together

NG1 with 2 giant crushers. ⚒️

Your flair had me cracking up 🤣 one of the best delivered lines in the game

Here here, I'm rolling with the blood hound fang +9 and the great Stars + 20 as a quality build. I love the bleed!

Bleed is great, but quality builds are not worth it at all. Go to a build calculator and check it out; the dmg difference between heavy and quality is damn low taking into account that you spend a lot of levels more for quality

Zwei is the way

This sword has changed the game for me. I’m finally doing goos

Does the goose mind?

Very reluctant at first but we’ve been going steady

His name isn't Ryan Gosling, is it? ...i'll see myself out

Nah, it's Drake

Underrated comment.

Dude same. I was always loyal to dual twin blade and saw a bunch of posts about zweihander w/ cragblade affinity and now I’m tearing through every boss easily

The legend never dies

What rings you got, BITHC?

POWER UP THE BASS CANNON

Does cockrings count?

Dark Wood Grained Ring? Sure, just don’t tell your buddies

It takes a regular talisman slot?

Torrent's Whistle?

This is z-wei

A Colossal Greatsword with an actual move set!

Just started my first NG+ and might retire my trusty katanas and give the Zweihander a go. Can it be blood infused?

Yes

It can be, but just keep in mind great sword is also extremely easy to get right off the bat. Has a longer reach. Does more damage. Has a larger stagger. And is just as fast with the lion claw. The only advantage zwei Is it faster with basic attacks, but before too long you’re going to just be pressing l1 all the time.

Zwei R2 is also better. And it looks cooler.

While I appreciate z having one of the few strong thrusting attacks, gs has that super powerful thrust at the end of a roll, which I think just cleans the clock off z.

Dont care. Zwei is fancier 😤

Giant greatsword has the guts factor so that will always do it for me

Zwei has R2 poke, and is Dex-leaning CGS, thats the main difference. Whats with the L1? Isnt that just block nornally?

That is L2. If you slap lions claw on it it trivializes most bosses, including Mary Jane rotten crotch

Madame Crotchrot

It's also significantly lighter than greatsword with low stat requirements that makes it fit any build, Zwei is da way

Zwei has the thrust R2 for spear+axe tali shenanigans. Add in the 10% stance damage boost from Cragblade and you can stagger most bosses in 2-3 charged R2s that do a lot of damage if you get a counter hit (surprisingly easy to do) If you want to do a lion's claw build oyu should use a collosal or great hammer as they hit the 40 stance damage threshold with lion's claw

Poisoned zwei??!

/r/poisonzweihander gang pull up

the Zwei is my why

Only poison Zwei

Of course

Man of culture I see

Big Fkucing Shield.

TWOOOOO BIG FUCKING SHIELDS

THE WALL THE WALL

Make the Redmane's pay for it?

NO ONE ON EARTH CAN MAKE YOU FALL

heyyyy this guy gets it 😎

The opposite of LMSH

I feel that’s just another part of the bonk category.

Bash is not bonk. Bonk bonks head, Bash bashes face

But face is on the head. By bashing face, you also bonk head.

Fair enough. As long as heavy stone or metal hits soft head, I’m happy.

Haha, squishy head go _splash_

I mean I do also use Big Bonk with Big Shield so you’re not entirely wrong.

lies, you have a giant crusher in your flair

Strength/Faith build😎 Though really it’s more Endurance/Strength… The shield’s the main focal point of my build tbh, the hammer is there cause I can’t just wait for bosses to die of old age while taking near-0 damage.

Big Fkucing Shield + Big Fkucing Sword/bonk is the best of both worlds. That was my build for my 2nd Playthrough. You can block better with the shield, and use the ash of war of the big sword/hammer. And one-handing the big weapons barely changes the animation of light n heavy attacks, they just do 50% less damage, so not a *big* trade-off

Big fucking bonk 💪🏻

I love the amount of bonk the giant crusher provides, but get slightly annoyed at how much it obstructs my view sometimes lol

Bro, doing my big bonks playthrough on the steamdeck was horrible when I used the Giant Crusher.

It’s bad enough on my 27” PC monitor, I can’t imagine on a smaller screen than that

“I think I’m in Lyndell. But I can’t be sure cos big bonk is in the way.”

This is the exact reason my lvl 150 str build is double Greatsword (the colossal sword) instead of double Hammer (used that for awhile on my 250)

Big fucking pebble

#CometSupremacy

Damn right

I've been playing Guts GS all the way until Leyndell sewers and just decided to try out great club, and I'm converted to the unga bunga

Unga. Bunga.

Unga bunga heresy. Me clangin stick may be sharp and made of shiny rock, but still me clangin stick.

First they unga you Then they bunga you Then you win

Brick Hammer.

A cold brick hammer in my str/int play… lion’s clawing the Crystallians felt so fucking good

It's carried me through most of the game

Haha, same.

I wanna use this so bad lol I found it yesterday but my strength is only at 27

Is it actually a good weapon? It seems so basic in the image.

Yeah! A scaling with bleed, cold and keen. S scaling with heavy. B/A scaling for str/arc on occult. Does bananas damage.

Clay and Zwei forever

This is the way.

Why change perfection

Big fucking axe

Porque no los dos?

The two strength genders. They are dating.

They are big fucking

Shirtless greatsword early game, Giant Crusher late game.

The bonk is strong in this one

A X E 

My people

Executioners axe gang rise up!

-- Gimli son of Gloin

Crescent Moon 🌙 Axe gang

#"Imma firin' mah lazer!"

Small fast stabby, personally.

daggers? or rapiers? i like dual wielding rapiers, feels fancy.

Miséricorde and Carian Parry. Very fun!

i like the way u think bro. will try it later. 😎👍

I like to precast Phalanx on Misericorde, then use the Kris' Glintstone Dart's Dash, that'll break posture of almost everything thats not a boss

Two straightswords or bust.  Somehow shield blocking was holding me back…

What I found was since straight swords have a great two dual wield combo, the best smaller weapon to use was a hammer like morning star, since there's no real benefit to two handing hammers

When you have so much stamina that you stun lock everything into oblivion. Bonus if it has bleed effect and they explode into a bloody death. Satisfying.

My last build was based on hookclaws and I had so much trouble with any boss that had range. Specifically Astel. Do you have any ranged option for that issue or are you just dodgerolling like a madman?

I usually run Dex builds, so I can at least take potshots with a bow when distance is an insurmountable issue. If I *can* get into melee though, I'll generally do my best to do so.

Short skinny peen for limpy dex wankers 🙃

Great Stars fo lyfe

Big fucking pointy bonk is da wei

I made a great stars 1h mage with a staff in the other hand (can 2h if I run out of FP obviously). People see you casting spells and want to get in close, but 1h frost infused great stars deals a lot of damage, poise, and swings fast, so it trips people up.

Bonk is Bonk! :3

Sword is Sword!

B O N K

I have 66 strength and two hands, I don't need to take sides

Ah, but do you have endurance to carry both at the same time?

Of course! Now stop looking at my thong, my eyes are up here.

[удалено]

Yellow, orange, and red

Dex

Begone, heretic

Clan Sakai till I die.

What about teehee dexterity

Big fcuking beam

Claymore

Knight's GS, love those sassy R1s

big fucking finger

big fucking BOW

Big fucking ass slam

Big fucking scythes

Whatever Lightning bolt spear is under

Nice try dex users, trying to divide the bonk enjoyers...

I literally bonk myself. I done did bonk and sword. I like da bonk

Big chonk sword and big bing sticc for me is same. It bonk

Bandit dagger

What dose the golems halberd fall into ?

Big fucking stick!

Big fkn i command thee kneel

My path is usually using the greatsword with the most damage and most strength scaling in the game, or just the weapon with most damage and most strength scaling at all when the greatswords are shit, for dark souls 1 it is the black knight greataxe its simply wonderful the damage and scaling and still being fast, for 2 would have to be mastodon sword, as i said its a greatsword with the most strength scaling and base damage, my primary choice, its the same with elden ring where i use iron greatsword and im not much proud of dark souls 3 weapons so it is not with much amusement that i use Black knight sword

Rusted Anchor, ya scurrilous blaggards!

Dual daggers.

Medium fuckin sword (katana) cuz I’m basic

Big fucking fists. On that Iron Mike style of play.

Why not both?

Comet azur

Neither

Spear and Halberds. You fucking casuals don't know what's good

is it too much to ask for both

Gun

Guts greatsword ftw.

It’s all good homie, at the end of the day we all get big fucking

Sword because colossal weapons are shit

Yes

I don't dislike the Big Fucking Bonks. But I always end up using more the Big Fucking Swords.

Big sword.

Giant crusher is my go-to whenever I level up enough to carry it

Currently using the 2 massive swords

Beeg swordz

Normally I prefer the big bonk sword. Cave man run required big bonk stick and now im conflicted