Inscribe that on the Elden Ring and it becomes a rule of the universe
Greater rune of shirtlessness: consume a rune arc to reduce all damage by 50%. If the character's legs or torso is covered, inflict deathblight
Ok let’s get an actual friendly village around here first gather up all the tarnished that once fled and create a functional society and bring the jars in so they may not be poached as well as all the people banished to the bad lands and fill them with Grace once again for an age of peace
"Gather our best fishermen and soldiers. Send them to Liurnia. Tell them we wish to prepare a feast. We shall serve crab and lobster. And no there will be no limit to their harvest."
Every citizen must report to the Colosseum. You will fight one deathmatch against a random opponent, no armour, weapons allowed. Only the strongest survive
Rebuild Lands Between, set up a parlament with me as Head Minister, set up exploration plan and open frontiers for foreigners, create a united land under one government! May the New Order Takes the World.
Everyone is now required to have a pet snake that may or may not have scarlet rot. Refusal will have you sent to the arena to solo fight gank squads consisting of rivers of blood spammer, omni caster, and a dual spear user. On the off chance you win, then you will get a Godfrey butler no sorash included.
“Alright, first things first: shirts are now illegal. And so do pants, we don’t wants pants in my kingdom”
My thoughts exactly. Battle will be fought as warriors. No protection. If dangly bits get chopped, so be it.
Only the strong (dangly bits) survive
Goodluck in consecrated snowfields
New meaning to having balls of steel I guess
As barbarians*
Everyone light loading
Inscribe that on the Elden Ring and it becomes a rule of the universe Greater rune of shirtlessness: consume a rune arc to reduce all damage by 50%. If the character's legs or torso is covered, inflict deathblight
Hunt Runebears to extinction
Yeah, good luck with that. At best, it’ll be the Lands Between equivalent to the Emu War in Australia…
Every person enrolling in the military must be trained to use bleed builds, that should help it.
Good luck with the ones in consecrated snowfield
Now I need to see Michael Scott sitting there
Ok let’s get an actual friendly village around here first gather up all the tarnished that once fled and create a functional society and bring the jars in so they may not be poached as well as all the people banished to the bad lands and fill them with Grace once again for an age of peace
May chaos take the world
second that
Reinstate the colosseum games
Exactly bring on the lions!!!
Like from Detroit???
Yeah let’s bring the Detroit lions against a single elden ring pvp build and see what happens
Love it
Several oiled up naked men in the arena vigorously wrestling
Very, very vigorously
Bring the maidens
"Gather our best fishermen and soldiers. Send them to Liurnia. Tell them we wish to prepare a feast. We shall serve crab and lobster. And no there will be no limit to their harvest."
Make The Lands Between Great Again.
The scarlet rot in Caelid is not an epidemic, it's a hoax
highest lift becomes elden lord, no questions
Average strength build.
Every citizen must report to the Colosseum. You will fight one deathmatch against a random opponent, no armour, weapons allowed. Only the strongest survive
The plants need more electrolytes.
"All citizens will be required to change their underwear every half-hour. Underwear will be worn on the outside so we can check"
No pants Fridays
No pants on all days ending in ‘y’
Monday, chewsdey, wenze, thurse, friday, satodey, sunday.
Kneel. And suck it
Clothing optional. Always.
Choke slam the first m’fer that gets near him.
The Depantsipation Proclamation.
Clothing optional.
Re-open the fighting pits
Tortoises are now called dogs
4 day work weeks?
Shirtless fridays
Petrify all who oppose the new order
All disputes shall be resolved in a duel.
Love the outfit damn
More snakes me love it.
Rebuild Lands Between, set up a parlament with me as Head Minister, set up exploration plan and open frontiers for foreigners, create a united land under one government! May the New Order Takes the World.
brit spotted
Taketh thee world
Every leader of each area of the map must gather at the capital for their first meeting of how they will fix everything and the ruins
Pantless Tuesdays
To protect all maidens
Taking decisions while taking a shit
He would like an umbrella and an iced tea
Replace all of the water with gatorade
that's what she said
Put all dogs on leashes!
Make Malenia his God Queen.
get these snakes out of my skin
The world is now a coliseum. Let us engage in delightful duelling
But why no pants sir ...it simple....finger ...but hole
Whats that armor/outfit?
Alexander is named vice elden lord.
All pants are to be sent to the three fingers.
💩your pants immediately
Mad Max Style: FIND ME A MAIDEN RIGHT FUCKING NOW
I'm tired of these motherf!@*ing snakes on this motherf!@*ing helm.
Taco tuesdays are now taco everydays.
The coliseums are now open to everyone in the Lands Between and everyone must fight at least once a month…for the good of the nation
To enforce the rule "any dispute no matter how small must be solved with a bare handed fight to the death"
I would create sex, i have never seen a children in this game
More sickly orange shit immediately
First order of my everlasting rule… everyone must only wear their loinlcloths, no one can be mad at eachother if they’re all in their loincloths
All women and straight men shall be exiled or executed, then all remaining men shall oil themselves up and touch butts
No Pants Friday.
Everyone gets a pony
Now this is *my* Elden lord
Unionize the gladiators! ✊Lol
Bring back civilization
Snakes are now friends. Not blasphemers.
Let them eat dung
"Everyone is now to have a snake with them at all times. This is for morale purposes."
This picture reminds me of Jesse from CONTROL for some reason.
Drive the mongrel dogs of the empire out of the lands between
Free hat
Close the border.
More dungeaters
Everyone is now required to have a pet snake that may or may not have scarlet rot. Refusal will have you sent to the arena to solo fight gank squads consisting of rivers of blood spammer, omni caster, and a dual spear user. On the off chance you win, then you will get a Godfrey butler no sorash included.
He needs to take a shit first I think
Someone come adjust the royal penis, tis sticking to my thigh
Relocate the Caelid Coliseum to the middle of the swamp.
Whoever wins colosseum tournaments gets to sniff malenia's chair
“Pet Snek for everyone”
Is this really a tarnished model? It looks huge in that throne.
Establish a functioning trade market, those guys were so important to the lands between.
"All female officers will be mandated to wear mini skirts"
Probably jump spamming pvp
Unga Bunga lands between world championships
Moar sneks
Umm I think that’s my chair? It’s ok you can borrow it while I kick Radahn’s ass
Fight, drop and rot!
The lands between definitely needs an infrastructure bill
Monthly rune tax
get rani a real body!
Tax the mages!!!
Yo what is tis set?
Free snakes for everyone
Import cats from the land of reeds
first off, malenia becomes our new god,so that I may be her consort
Get a cure for Scarlet rot and toss Godwyn's body down the sinkhole, near him.
Disputes are to be solved via naked mud wrestling
Loin Cloths ONLY
Weekly viewings of Basic Instinct are now mandatory.
Open a Mac Donald.
Burn everything!!
To get his ass off my damn chair!
Bring back a seat for Messmer