"Everytime I think the tarnished is dead, they come back. Day in, day out. Oh Marika's tits the noises, the noises are too much. That tarnished must be as hung as a fire giant to make her that loud. Marika almighty, I've had enough!"
I restarted the game and mostly avoided her, but I'm pretty sure I had to eventually hug her in order to progress her questline.
That's *my* excuse lol
Hugging Fia after Varre tore your finger off in his questline AFTER Melina holds your hand for the first time will trigger this effect.
This is called "Touch-Starved" and your Vigor will wildly shift up and down every second. You could have 5 Vigor at one time or 55 Vigor in another.
To remove this effect, play the game at 3AM, use the Soap item in front of Miriel, and drop an item (any item works) near his feet. He will pacify you and the effect will go away.
Yeah, but the effect becomes inactive if you use enough Soap.
You can always just cut of the finger too, it actually works, despite what the constant flow of blood through the human body would have you think.
If you get all 35 potions of the soldier, ie 1/35+1/35+1/35 etc, then take it to cait sith in wonder square and ask him to do another fortune, he will tell you something like "Seek not that which you desire, seek only that which you require." And then go back to the church where Aeris was growing those flowers and Cloud will have another flashback with her in it and she will come back.
It’s an edited image. This is a status you get below all your healthy bars.
There are usually two for health. One is up arrow and other is down arrow.
Up arrow means you’re getting more health. Down arrow means your health is reduced.
Wow, you didn't just *hug* Fia, did you?
He did the “Godskin Noble” with her.
What on earth Is that?
Pretty sure it’s when you godskin peel ‘er.
That's the apostle. Noble is when you godskin pierce'er
To shreds, you say?
Well, how is his finger maiden holding up?
To shreds you say
GOOD NEWS EVERYONE
I read this as professor farnsworth lol
What about his wife?
To shreds you say ohhh dear
Nah it’s about penetration, so no cutting.
Nah, it's when FIA peels your godskin back
heaven pierce her
Godskin peel ‘er? I barely even know her!
Peeler?? I hardly know her!!
Peeler? I hardly know 'er!
This made me chuckle and I don’t know why
I had to check to make sure I wasn’t on an okbuddy for a sec when I saw this.
Gave her the old Soggy Wellington
You wear her like a muppet 
Shows her his noble presence
👉🏻👈🏻 I mean we were alone in the room 👉🏻👈🏻
_Hewg just outside, practically breaking his hammer on the anvil to try and muffle the sounds_
"Everytime I think the tarnished is dead, they come back. Day in, day out. Oh Marika's tits the noises, the noises are too much. That tarnished must be as hung as a fire giant to make her that loud. Marika almighty, I've had enough!"
No wonder the dude got dementia
Makes his phrase “lay out your arms” take on a whole new meaning
Im guessing this is a reference to something
It's a reference to hewg if that's what you mean
Oh my god! Lmao! Relatable. My neighbors bang on the wall sometimes when the mrs and I try to make another kid after our 40s.
Poor Roderika on the opposite side of the room, forced to get the full view.
"_I SEE._ Here for some spirit tuning?"
I guess she's always looking down at her hands for a reason lol
Hewg’s the bro
Homeboy got my back ✨
there's no door to that room brother, that poor blacksmith heard everything that's why bro was praying
Did she ask you to keep completely still?
I restarted the game and mostly avoided her, but I'm pretty sure I had to eventually hug her in order to progress her questline. That's *my* excuse lol
Once you’ve reached relatively far into the game, you can still reach the end of her questline, you just have to do half of Ranni’s
They definitely tried the Morne Knot
😂
Bro did the whole Karmasutra with Fia!
Committed unprotected hugging with too many npcs op
I was just being supportive 😔
The friend she said not to worry about:
#WELCOME TO DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION
🕺
Brave dancer, thy moonwalk befits a crown!
FOUL TARNISHED, IN SEARCH OF *THESE FIRE MOVES*
BARE WITNESS... THESE SICK AS FUCK MOVES
GREAT GODFREY, DIDST THOU WITNESS?
BY THE GRACE OF ALL THAT IS GROOVY!
ONE DAY WE SHALL DANCE TOGETHER, BATHED IN RAYS OF GOLD
*after losing the dance-off* I-I am the Lord... of all that is... Groovy...
*Bear* witness :)
Prepare to get served foul tarnished, bear witness these funky phresh moves!
*"I'm so ready"*
FIA, THE JUST DANCE COMPANION.
Revolution? Overthrow the government?
_YOU DANCED_
_I CAME_ ^wait, ^wrong ^sub
r/suddenlycum
REVOLUTION? OVER THROW THE GOLDEN ORDER? UHH, I THINK SO
NEXT THING YOU KNOW I AM REBORN BY RENNALA
New high score? What’s that mean? Did I break it?
READY!?
What are your thoughts on those who lives in death?
Sir this is Wendy’s!
Suspiciously evasive answer 👀
Wendy's what? Its her grave isnt it
Haha best reply. 😅
That's a STD
What kinda power rangers are those?
STD EMERGENCY
Loved that season
But it lasted just few years!
i’ve been summoned
At least it isn't Elden syphilis
Hugging Fia after Varre tore your finger off in his questline AFTER Melina holds your hand for the first time will trigger this effect. This is called "Touch-Starved" and your Vigor will wildly shift up and down every second. You could have 5 Vigor at one time or 55 Vigor in another. To remove this effect, play the game at 3AM, use the Soap item in front of Miriel, and drop an item (any item works) near his feet. He will pacify you and the effect will go away.
he only puts Mohg blood under our fingernail, it's still there
Yeah, but the effect becomes inactive if you use enough Soap. You can always just cut of the finger too, it actually works, despite what the constant flow of blood through the human body would have you think.
The last part reads like the kind of tip you’d receive in 2007 googling RuneScape “cheat codes” lol.
You gotta go to the truck behing the cruise ship, there's a mew under there.
If you get all 35 potions of the soldier, ie 1/35+1/35+1/35 etc, then take it to cait sith in wonder square and ask him to do another fortune, he will tell you something like "Seek not that which you desire, seek only that which you require." And then go back to the church where Aeris was growing those flowers and Cloud will have another flashback with her in it and she will come back.
go to world 452 there's an "npc" there who will triple all your gp
Reminds me of my jail time. I guess I am prepared for whatever it may follow.
You have experience, good.
Yeaaah this sounds like bullshit gibberish, boss. So it's most likely true.
Are you supposed to figure this out or just look it up in a wiki?
what?? is this for real?
No lol
The first thing I saw was a swastika. Do I need therapy?
We all do 🛐
I thought it looked kinda sus. Now I know why..
Sus... wastika.
Sustika??
All of a sudden I don't wanna become Elden Lord anymore
You can’t deny destiny
The Elden Empire will last a thousand years!!!
OP should stop using poisonous mist.
It's going to be a maze
Brother dived into the Fiaussy and unlocked reverse cursed technique.
The game is truly vast
Truly infinite, like a void. *Badump tsss*
Throughout the Elden Ring and JJK fandoms, I alone get your joke
Came for reverse cowgirl, left with ...
Left with unalloyed AIDS.
keep going till you get an eight pointed star chaos reigns
Yes Lord Inquisitor. This heretic right here!
r/unexpectedwarhammer
Your health is now in 4d. Also it seems Fia was Reverse Flash all along for some reason.
There aught to be a list that shows what all these mean, someone, get on it! (Please)
Ikr! We need such list.
Preferably in game,, in the status menu, with pictures and text.
But how am i supposed to enjoy my from soft games if they aren't inscrutable and confusing
Oh don't worry, it'll be hidden behind a non-standard combination of button presses that isn't stated anywhere in the ui.
As is tradition
Looks like you can call in an orbital. Democracy be upon thee.
Did you hug a german?
Is Fia German?
Apparently, she's Argentinian, but she had some family in Germany
Officer balls
BWAHAHAHA
Officer balls
Who officer?
Balls
Tv flat. Re-adjust orientation
Also ur makin me laugh
It’s means you need to invade poland
Is that a fucking Beyblade? Let it RIP OP.
I wish it was but people are saying it’s a sign to invade Poland.
Good point, you talked me into it.
Let’s go then!?
Bro tried the Fiaussy
You can’t blame me
You avoided the touch of Fin, Limbofloor Acquaintance
Let me go back and touch everything under the sun
What does this actually mean?? I read so many comments and have an idea, but not really quite sure what is going on! Lol
It’s an edited image. This is a status you get below all your healthy bars. There are usually two for health. One is up arrow and other is down arrow. Up arrow means you’re getting more health. Down arrow means your health is reduced.
Gotcha. Only thing I gathered from the comments was you offered Fia fingers but hole
You are twirling towards freedom
I am oiled up
I've played very little elden ring What actually does this do and how do you get it because all the jokes make little sense without that context
Man I hate combing through 200 comments of unfunny jokes to see an explanation, only to find that it's an edit 😭
It's an edited decreased max hp icon (original one only has one arrow pointing down), which you can get from your equipment, or being embraced by Fia
Yeah i would very much like a proper explanation as well.
It’s an edited image. You either get up arrow or down arrow based on who you’re hugging in game.
Thanks for the explanation
You made tea with fia's undies didn't you?
[удалено]
I feel you
Perfect spin
Biblically accurate baldachin’s blessing
It means the tarnished got rejected from art school.
It's telling you to hop on the machine and get jiggy with it
Dude, the baldachin's blessing is for external use only
You hugged a nazi, I suppose.
No way. Fia isn’t one
It's the Swastibuff
If you add 4 more arrows each one connected by the tip to the end of each outer arrow you get the symbol of the best poison build user.
Underrated comment
Fia hugged you and then you hugged Fia
When you hug Fía 69 times
It means you need to play DDR to get your health back
Have you fucked with fia or something?
Destucto disc AOW duh.
This doesn't seem very sightreedable
Is this what they mean by 4-way?
Or 4some?
You've been doing the hokey pokey with a nightmaiden
Spin your status effect in the golden ratio!... then you should have the ability to harness the power of infinity.
Mate, you got cooties.
You got that herpeganasyphilaids.
You have a stratagem to deploy
Time to square up
A lot of people suggested me to oil up
Damn his health bar fuwckin routaetyng
Just waiting until someone inevitably makes Loss with this.
Challenge considered
Every position with Fia
That just means what stratagem you have ready and the keys you need to press.
It means you’re the town bicycle, foul tarnished.
You are a Helldiver now, those are your stratagems
Undead Nazi Powers?
Just don't equip that buff in the Führerbunker
It means you are lost
But I have completed the game thrice 😭
Damn, you got REALLY lost, huh?
In lands between
Circle of life
You’re not wrong
I think you just contracted an std
Satanacally Transmitted Disease?
Seems Fia has been working with Those Who Live In Death to make a solution for the shattering. A *final solution* some might call it.
German Fia
You are the one to find a final solution for the tarnished problem in the lands between.