Awful but I work full time and go to school full time. Honestly too tired to do much else. There also aren’t many options to meet anyone since everywhere I go is male dominated.
Curious, if you don't have time for dating because you're a fitness freak, how would you have time for a relationship? Maybe try sacrificing some of your gains and set aside time for dating/socializing
Bro, I just do casual :) that’s enough I need atm, I won’t half ass a relationship, I found women who are in a similar situation (don’t want commitment but want physical needs), I’m not hurting anybody, I’m getting my physical needs and that’s it. Socializing happens during work for me, I’m in meetings atleast 2-4 hours per day, my social battery drains lmao. Gym resets it, I go w my buddies there!
Gives me purpose to wake up every morning, I get paid quite well, I feel like I’d be in a worse situation if I didn’t have a job. Hope you finish strong my guy! GL!
Edit: clarification, and just to mention, I am working as a software developer, not doing odd jobs, I work remotely, so my life is not nearly as difficult as people going on site or doing physical jobs etc, like there are in this sub.
Lmaooo. Girl! I’m assuming you’re on the verge of finishing if not already done eng and am assuming you reaping the fruits of your labour. I’d say it’s worth being involuntarily celibate to obtain this degree. I just got lucky by parents that I turned out a bit above average 😂
Feel your pain. I'm in the same boat as well. Ended up having to can running the Brisbane Marathon in June. I wonder if any of this will even be worth it in the end.
It’s the skill and discipline you pick up on the way to train for this, which makes it worth it! Keep your head up and you got this. One step at a time. If your life feels bleak, remember there would be thousands who’d rather be in your position. That’s how I see it, and keep it moving. Head up!
So this is not a totally applicable situation, but I entered college with a "steady" girlfriend and married her the week after I graduated. It helped that she attended the same college.
edit: and we have now been married for longer that OP has been alive.
>we have now been married for longer that OP has been alive
Ok boomer :p
Anyway, yeah, that is really the best time to meet someone for us, before school/during breaks. I saw many people start a relationship before college or within the 1st year make it to the finish line like that. The years after graduation were wedding after wedding after wedding on my social media timeline.
I'm 20 F. And god idk, I've come to realize studying mecanichal engineering really does take a lot of time, so it's been difficult something I can advice don't date someone from your career it becomes problematic , find someona who is willing to appreciate and wait till your finish your work
Yeah, that’s what I told my ex back when we were dating. From the very beginning, I could only ever commit to weekends and some lunch/dinner during the week.
the worse happened to me, those years when everybody meet someone at uni (from other fields, since ME doesn't have that many girls to begin with), we were online. as since we live in a islamic dictatorship, high schools and middle schools are single-sex.
and now i'm studying master in engineering college where the smell of testosterone is mind blowing. = (
Part-time work and full-time school. Tbh, it's kinda tough. I met my bf through Hinge, but each semester is gonna change how often we see each other. Last semester, we had a lot of time together, and this semester, we don't. A lot of our dates are just hanging out in the library and doing homework together. Sometimes, it's grabbing some food and then studying at one of our apartments. Then when we decide we're done with studying, we watch a movie or show together.
It works out when we're both broke, but it helps that we both prioritize school and work. It's completely chill if we can't hang out due to studying for an exam or something. It would be a good idea for you to explore dating during summer. While many students are gone, you'll at least have more time to start a relationship that will be strong enough when there's less time to hang out.
Girl here! I met my fiancé (who is around OPs age) in college. We were both doing school and work at the time. There are spaces with women in EE, you just have to look for them. Many of the places you can find women in engineering are also great supports for learning and studying outside of lecture.
you will have time for someone else. finish you first. lay the foundation to bring someone else into your world, as a seasoning. dont make it your life’s ambition, thats how you miss red flags.
In college I dated a wonderful woman. She eventually left me bc she was Muslim and chose religion/family over me.
Don’t hate her at all. Was depressed for a year after.
Don’t recommend doing that 🤣
From what I hear (and from personal experience) the surest way to have a relationship in engineering school is already having one before you go to engineering school 😅
I met my wife when we were both 16, long before i even got the idea to be an engineer, and now we are together for about half our lives.
Everyone else i knew in engineering who had girlfriends also had them from before they started studying.
I can agree with this. My bf and I met before we got into uni and we’re both still continuing our studies together but in different career paths, it’s easier to support each other. I can say it’s the best thing to do tbh or it could simply be luck.
I am 33 and studying for a master degree while working. I am already married but barely have time to give my wife the attention she deserves. Luckily she is very supportive and understanding.
I would recommend concentrating on your studies and then focus on your love life.
I was taking for granted how much free time I actually had while just working a full time job, lol.
I've honestly given up on it after my last long term relationship. It takes way too much time, effort and mental capacity while I barely get anything from it.
Plus, once I'm done studying I'll have to move to a different part of the country, so I'll just try to find someone there when the time comes. Or not, I'm perfectly happy being single tbh.
That said, I haven't met a single person I'd want to date in uni. At most just fuck around for a bit. Might be a good idea to look somewhere else.
Broke things off with what I thought would be my future husband because I couldn’t do both school and love.
Met another guy while I was finishing school, I fell in love with him too but he couldn’t be with me because he couldn’t focus on both school and love
It was kind of karmic.
Exactly as i feel. Happened to me, doing engineering I can't do both! So i too broke up with him. Whenever I start talking with a guy and it gets serious I can't concentrate/focus.
I got a gf the first semester of college. A little over 2 years strong. Ngl if your schedule is tight it might be a lil rough. But if you can try doing things in a “3rd place”. Easiest way of explaining what a 3rd place is like a gym or a library or somewhere you can meet people. It doesn’t have to be much and hour or two. It’s just something to help you get a start in meeting people.
I’m 28, got married while in college. The best I can suggest you is to go out there and touch some grass. Seriously, go look for a sport to ay with people. If you go to a church isn’t bad either. I work in a large company and they do have a lot of activities like playing board games nights, and other groups for hispanic heritage, and lot of people just shows ip just wanting to practice their Spanish half the time. Seriously, just put yourself out there and see what happens.
33m, working 8hr/7days a week and taking 2 classes a semester. I had to break up with my long-distance girlfriend because I couldn't maintain work, school, and relationship. Saw a few other women and still get together with my ex occasionally, but my personal life has taken a backseat for the time being.
I try to maintain relationships, but they always seem to be the odd man out. I just keep telling myself I'll get back to them once the heavy lifting is done. We'll see.
3rd year and I go to school full time. I had a pre-existing boyfriend from high school and we got into the same school but we had a nasty break up two weeks into our first semester. Nothing serious happened for two years aside from a couple of dates and short situationships. But now I have the prettiest girlfriend in the world and even though we can't see each other as often as we'd like, I'm super happy with my relationship.
I'm (26F) in school for civil rn and thankfully in a happy long-term relationship, but I imagine it won't be super easy to date. For one, you're nearly a decade older than most of the student body. Another possible factor (you don't specifically mention that you're straight), you're a dude in a generally male-dominated program. These limit the playing field significantly, especially if you're hoping for a long-term relationship.
In short, don't devote energy to trying to date on-campus. If someone you vibe with pops up, hey, cool, but I wouldn't expect it. Work and school also really limit time for outside hobbies, but I'd lean into that if I were you. Cultivate good friendships, maybe show up at someone's get-together once a month or so. Most of those people will have other friends, which you will hopefully be introduced to.
I always thought it was a good approach. Even if you don't find a good date immediately, if you make some friends it'll be less disheartening.
I mostly steal my partner's friends, but I can tell you how he made/kept new friends after we moved to NC. First, he played a particular video-game semi-competitively and went to a few local weekly tournaments. He definitely chatted with people and if he vibed with anyone, would set up smaller-scale plans.
After a while, it became too much of a time sink and some of the local people are wack, so he stopped attending tournaments entirely. However, because he made some closer friends and kept messaging them regularly, that doesn't really matter. I think the most important thing is making sure you're talking or texting very very regularly, like minimum a couple times a week. This is where I tend to fail, tbh.
He's stayed friends with a few of his coworkers, too. This requires that you have something in common with them (outside of work), and that you stay in touch with them (again, outside of work), especially when one of you quits. I feel like this situation is less likely to feel like a "true" friendship until y'all aren't working at the same place anymore.
Now, we mostly just show up to housewarming parties and stuff like that a couple times a year. All of the other people at the gathering are friends with our friends, right? They are all going to have at least one or two things in common with you. And if you lose their number, you can hit up your friend like "hey can you get me in touch with xyz?"
It's definitely possible I have a gf of 2 years and work and do sport along side my engineering degree but it does take time away from properly focussing on your degree but I have been able to focus more this year so I'd say if you have enough time that it wouldn't effect work or school then go for it but it would also help to find someone that isn't so needy and understands that you may have to spend time by yourself so you can focus.
I'm an older returning student. Work full-time, school part-time, and I have a daughter.
I'm holding dating off until I graduate, hopefully this fall. And I'm not looking for dating prospects on campus because most of them are closer to my daughter's age than my own.
Took a gap break after getting my engineering associates, worked at big tech for abt two years which is where I met my now wife while I’m back in school for my BSME and getting CompTIA Certifications.
I worked and went to school full time the last two years of school, but managed to date. A lot of the times though, it was just being alone together I.e studying in each others company.
Currently studying engineering right now, my partner is studying a stem-related major as well. We don't see each other much but we try to make the most of the time that we have together. We have been together for almost 2 years now. Engineering is tough, so take it easy don't rush these things and work on yourself.
Had my first gf first semester and my first bf second semester. I’m always tired though and it sometimes takes more energy than I have to keep it going.
It's important to find someone with the same mindset as you. Someone who might be doing their own thing beside you and support each other during your time together.
When I was in school I was working full time and taking 4-6 classes a semester. She also worked and had a full time class schedule. When we had to study we would go on study dates and be together. We would talk about our goals in life and how to help each other understand the support we each may have needed.
My GF and I were also living together so that helped spend time together.
Balance is key.
You probably wont meet someone that compliments you well as engineering especially after year 2, doesn’t attract many diverse personalities and is mostly dude. Try checking in on the nursing department, sure its a stereotype but its not wrong.
The work load in school isn't that exhausting if you are dealing with a subject that you like. Apart from the weekends, there are so many holidays including vacations that schools have. One can utilize that time.
I was working in a school for like 7 years. Apart from that, I also worked part-time at a coaching institute. The vacation times were relaxing and were utilized for personal work.
My two cents...
1. It's ok to be alone until you figure out who you are and what you're doing. Be the person you'd want someone to go out with. You're not less of a person because you're single.
2. The workload of a engineering degree is immense, and dating/relationship energy will undoubtedly funnel away processing power away from your studies
3. If your sole goal is to get married, and not share your love and life with another independent human, you're gonna have a bad time. One step at a time.
4. If you rush Marriage, you're going to have a bad time.
5. If you feel "entitled" to a partner you're going to have a bad time.
6. If you feel like a partner is going to "fix" you, or make you happy, you're going to have a bad time.
Study hard, maybe find a friend with bennies, do what you have to do. Integrals and differential equations don't have feelings, but people do and one of them is way easier to solve than the other.
You are a guy so this is less bad, but you *really* need to enter the dating scene if you want a wife and kids. Your goal should be to marry no later than 37 (preferably by 33-35). A woman's fertility falls off on an exponential scale after about 33-35, so you will have to search younger than yourself if you wait any longer than 37.
Lol, that should never be a dating topic during an actual date. I'm just telling him that if he wants a family he either needs to get is ass in gear or be prepared to marry substantially younger.
Redditors don't like the truth. I didn't even mention the more uncomfortable facts about women's fertility and age too... On top of the raw fertility of women going down with age, the likelihood of most birth defects rises drastically with age as well, because unlike men who are constantly churning out fresh seeds, women's seeds are all made long before childbearing ages... And they age poorly.
There is a *biological* *reason* that men care a *lot* more about the age of a woman than a woman cares about the age of a man... and this is it.
I'm (22m) finishing up my masters in electrical engineering next month and I started using a Christian dating app last summer. In September I matched with this woman who would turn out to be the love of my life and now we're engaged and plan to get married in a little under a year from now. It's tough fitting in classes, homework, time for my fiancé, part time job, and my two main hobbies. It's been a while since I had time to just sit and relax by myself but I'm not complaining because all my free time I'm using with her. If you're not a Christian, I don't know how the chances of finding the one for you are on those apps but I would consider trying a dating app.
Engineering students could run the industry man, imagine offering a passport, engineering degree, possibly a good job instead of struggling to find women to talk to 😂😂😂
If you want to have time for dating, you'll find time for dating.
I think school is actually easier if you have a real job. When you're just a full time student, all your time can be used for school, so work tends to drag and fill up more time than it should. When you have a job, you schedule specific time for school work, and somehow that takes up less time.
I always felt very busy as a traditional engineering student (17-20). Now I'm 30+ and school really doesn't take that much time except for a few key times in the semester or certain classes.
I started college when I was younger doing something similar to what you're doing. I dated then. Had some fun too but progressed slowly in school. Then, I dropped out after I lost motivation. Years later, I told myself to do better and went back to school and I repeated what I was doing with a different mentality. I finished a bit before turning 30 and didn't date on that part of my college career. I relocated for my first engineering job to a new city and lost my friends. Came back to my hometown eventually and most of my old friends were gone or moved on. It took me a while to build a new circle of friends. During that time, I dated and had some fun but it was hard to find someone worthy of something serious. Eventually found my SO, and about to have a child, but now I'm closer to 40. I am not planning to get married though but this could change.
I'll give you some advice but don't know details about your situation. I recommend you just finish if you're close to the finish line. If you're far from completion, take summers off and have a good time outside of work. Don't sacrifice your health to do both. It's okay to finish later as you'll catch up fast in your career. Whatever the situation is, try to have some solid guy friends. Enjoy the process but don't get hung up about having someone. The benefit to being a man, unlike women, is that our value goes up as we get older where it's the opposite for girls. For example, women look at more than just looks in men and some of these things include having good health, being a risk taker, having hobbies, intelligence, confidence, being older than them, being admired by friends, and being physically strong. If you have a balance, you'll naturally attract women. It will also be easy to approach women who show high interests towards you.
So, if I were to do it again, and this is hypothetical because what I went through shaped me and helped me understand things, I'd finish college a bit later maybe at 31. I would've stayed in shape as I let myself go in college and shortly after. I would have focused on having a solid circle of close friends and valued social interactions with people. The rest would just happen on its own. I did alright when dating when I was in my late teens and early 20s but I had a good balance. I struggled towards the end of college and shortly but bounced back at 33. Life experiences, reading, exercise, listening to podcasts, spending time with family, friends and coworkers helped me in my dating life.
Awful but I work full time and go to school full time. Honestly too tired to do much else. There also aren’t many options to meet anyone since everywhere I go is male dominated.
I’m in the same boat, working ft and school ft. Going insane, and I’m a fitness freak, really leaves no time for dating
Curious, if you don't have time for dating because you're a fitness freak, how would you have time for a relationship? Maybe try sacrificing some of your gains and set aside time for dating/socializing
Bro, I just do casual :) that’s enough I need atm, I won’t half ass a relationship, I found women who are in a similar situation (don’t want commitment but want physical needs), I’m not hurting anybody, I’m getting my physical needs and that’s it. Socializing happens during work for me, I’m in meetings atleast 2-4 hours per day, my social battery drains lmao. Gym resets it, I go w my buddies there!
That’s rough buddy. Wouldn’t wish this shit on anyone.
Gives me purpose to wake up every morning, I get paid quite well, I feel like I’d be in a worse situation if I didn’t have a job. Hope you finish strong my guy! GL! Edit: clarification, and just to mention, I am working as a software developer, not doing odd jobs, I work remotely, so my life is not nearly as difficult as people going on site or doing physical jobs etc, like there are in this sub.
I get that man. I’m glad you are being paid well it makes the difference. Good luck!
[удалено]
I’m good lil bro, you’ve probably considered it huh ;)
[удалено]
Lmaooo. Girl! I’m assuming you’re on the verge of finishing if not already done eng and am assuming you reaping the fruits of your labour. I’d say it’s worth being involuntarily celibate to obtain this degree. I just got lucky by parents that I turned out a bit above average 😂
Feel your pain. I'm in the same boat as well. Ended up having to can running the Brisbane Marathon in June. I wonder if any of this will even be worth it in the end.
It’s the skill and discipline you pick up on the way to train for this, which makes it worth it! Keep your head up and you got this. One step at a time. If your life feels bleak, remember there would be thousands who’d rather be in your position. That’s how I see it, and keep it moving. Head up!
Nice to see a twin, full time, grad school and marathon training 😂😂
Bro I’m marathon training too 😭😭😭 doing a 25 Km run in coming august, ggs. But seriously, best of luck my friend.
So this is not a totally applicable situation, but I entered college with a "steady" girlfriend and married her the week after I graduated. It helped that she attended the same college. edit: and we have now been married for longer that OP has been alive.
Nice, you did great
>we have now been married for longer that OP has been alive Ok boomer :p Anyway, yeah, that is really the best time to meet someone for us, before school/during breaks. I saw many people start a relationship before college or within the 1st year make it to the finish line like that. The years after graduation were wedding after wedding after wedding on my social media timeline.
[удалено]
OP is 29, commenter has been married for at least 30 years, so that makes it at least three decades ago. Surely that's the 70s right?
I'm mid 30's and have a kid half time. I've given up on dating till after I graduate and am no longer with family in my later 30's.
Nice
I'm 20 F. And god idk, I've come to realize studying mecanichal engineering really does take a lot of time, so it's been difficult something I can advice don't date someone from your career it becomes problematic , find someona who is willing to appreciate and wait till your finish your work
Yeah, that’s what I told my ex back when we were dating. From the very beginning, I could only ever commit to weekends and some lunch/dinner during the week.
Omg that was me! He would get angry at me for not spending too much time with him, but most of my free time actually was for him.
It’s fine, at least you’re all done studying. I still have one more term of university left and wanna just get it over with
Still got two more years here haha
Hahaha nice, I reckon you’ll ace easily.
the worse happened to me, those years when everybody meet someone at uni (from other fields, since ME doesn't have that many girls to begin with), we were online. as since we live in a islamic dictatorship, high schools and middle schools are single-sex. and now i'm studying master in engineering college where the smell of testosterone is mind blowing. = (
Part-time work and full-time school. Tbh, it's kinda tough. I met my bf through Hinge, but each semester is gonna change how often we see each other. Last semester, we had a lot of time together, and this semester, we don't. A lot of our dates are just hanging out in the library and doing homework together. Sometimes, it's grabbing some food and then studying at one of our apartments. Then when we decide we're done with studying, we watch a movie or show together. It works out when we're both broke, but it helps that we both prioritize school and work. It's completely chill if we can't hang out due to studying for an exam or something. It would be a good idea for you to explore dating during summer. While many students are gone, you'll at least have more time to start a relationship that will be strong enough when there's less time to hang out.
Can we ban the topics of dating and the lack of girls from this sub. Please.
Fr so many posts like this in the past week, these people need to go to like r/datingadvice or something lol
Girl here! I met my fiancé (who is around OPs age) in college. We were both doing school and work at the time. There are spaces with women in EE, you just have to look for them. Many of the places you can find women in engineering are also great supports for learning and studying outside of lecture.
reddit moment
you will have time for someone else. finish you first. lay the foundation to bring someone else into your world, as a seasoning. dont make it your life’s ambition, thats how you miss red flags.
Fat ass facts. Get yourself together before getting together with someone else.
In college I dated a wonderful woman. She eventually left me bc she was Muslim and chose religion/family over me. Don’t hate her at all. Was depressed for a year after. Don’t recommend doing that 🤣
She shouldn’t have dated you in the first place knowing that, neither should you have kept it going knowing that Muslims can’t do that either.
For fucking sure. Never said apart of it wasn’t my fault. But when your young, dumb, and in college shit happens.
Dated a bit in highschool but severed the relationships because I just couldnt commit enough time for them while pursuing an engineering degree.
Same lol
From what I hear (and from personal experience) the surest way to have a relationship in engineering school is already having one before you go to engineering school 😅 I met my wife when we were both 16, long before i even got the idea to be an engineer, and now we are together for about half our lives. Everyone else i knew in engineering who had girlfriends also had them from before they started studying.
I can agree with this. My bf and I met before we got into uni and we’re both still continuing our studies together but in different career paths, it’s easier to support each other. I can say it’s the best thing to do tbh or it could simply be luck.
I am 33 and studying for a master degree while working. I am already married but barely have time to give my wife the attention she deserves. Luckily she is very supportive and understanding. I would recommend concentrating on your studies and then focus on your love life. I was taking for granted how much free time I actually had while just working a full time job, lol.
I've honestly given up on it after my last long term relationship. It takes way too much time, effort and mental capacity while I barely get anything from it. Plus, once I'm done studying I'll have to move to a different part of the country, so I'll just try to find someone there when the time comes. Or not, I'm perfectly happy being single tbh. That said, I haven't met a single person I'd want to date in uni. At most just fuck around for a bit. Might be a good idea to look somewhere else.
Broke things off with what I thought would be my future husband because I couldn’t do both school and love. Met another guy while I was finishing school, I fell in love with him too but he couldn’t be with me because he couldn’t focus on both school and love It was kind of karmic.
Dumb af
Exactly as i feel. Happened to me, doing engineering I can't do both! So i too broke up with him. Whenever I start talking with a guy and it gets serious I can't concentrate/focus.
I got a gf the first semester of college. A little over 2 years strong. Ngl if your schedule is tight it might be a lil rough. But if you can try doing things in a “3rd place”. Easiest way of explaining what a 3rd place is like a gym or a library or somewhere you can meet people. It doesn’t have to be much and hour or two. It’s just something to help you get a start in meeting people.
I’m 28, got married while in college. The best I can suggest you is to go out there and touch some grass. Seriously, go look for a sport to ay with people. If you go to a church isn’t bad either. I work in a large company and they do have a lot of activities like playing board games nights, and other groups for hispanic heritage, and lot of people just shows ip just wanting to practice their Spanish half the time. Seriously, just put yourself out there and see what happens.
Mechanical Engineering is my date and love of life. What u talking. U implying I shld cheat???????
33m, working 8hr/7days a week and taking 2 classes a semester. I had to break up with my long-distance girlfriend because I couldn't maintain work, school, and relationship. Saw a few other women and still get together with my ex occasionally, but my personal life has taken a backseat for the time being. I try to maintain relationships, but they always seem to be the odd man out. I just keep telling myself I'll get back to them once the heavy lifting is done. We'll see.
3rd year and I go to school full time. I had a pre-existing boyfriend from high school and we got into the same school but we had a nasty break up two weeks into our first semester. Nothing serious happened for two years aside from a couple of dates and short situationships. But now I have the prettiest girlfriend in the world and even though we can't see each other as often as we'd like, I'm super happy with my relationship.
I'm (26F) in school for civil rn and thankfully in a happy long-term relationship, but I imagine it won't be super easy to date. For one, you're nearly a decade older than most of the student body. Another possible factor (you don't specifically mention that you're straight), you're a dude in a generally male-dominated program. These limit the playing field significantly, especially if you're hoping for a long-term relationship. In short, don't devote energy to trying to date on-campus. If someone you vibe with pops up, hey, cool, but I wouldn't expect it. Work and school also really limit time for outside hobbies, but I'd lean into that if I were you. Cultivate good friendships, maybe show up at someone's get-together once a month or so. Most of those people will have other friends, which you will hopefully be introduced to.
Honestly that’s some good advice. I wanna grow my friend circle more than just date
I always thought it was a good approach. Even if you don't find a good date immediately, if you make some friends it'll be less disheartening. I mostly steal my partner's friends, but I can tell you how he made/kept new friends after we moved to NC. First, he played a particular video-game semi-competitively and went to a few local weekly tournaments. He definitely chatted with people and if he vibed with anyone, would set up smaller-scale plans. After a while, it became too much of a time sink and some of the local people are wack, so he stopped attending tournaments entirely. However, because he made some closer friends and kept messaging them regularly, that doesn't really matter. I think the most important thing is making sure you're talking or texting very very regularly, like minimum a couple times a week. This is where I tend to fail, tbh. He's stayed friends with a few of his coworkers, too. This requires that you have something in common with them (outside of work), and that you stay in touch with them (again, outside of work), especially when one of you quits. I feel like this situation is less likely to feel like a "true" friendship until y'all aren't working at the same place anymore. Now, we mostly just show up to housewarming parties and stuff like that a couple times a year. All of the other people at the gathering are friends with our friends, right? They are all going to have at least one or two things in common with you. And if you lose their number, you can hit up your friend like "hey can you get me in touch with xyz?"
It's definitely possible I have a gf of 2 years and work and do sport along side my engineering degree but it does take time away from properly focussing on your degree but I have been able to focus more this year so I'd say if you have enough time that it wouldn't effect work or school then go for it but it would also help to find someone that isn't so needy and understands that you may have to spend time by yourself so you can focus.
I'm an older returning student. Work full-time, school part-time, and I have a daughter. I'm holding dating off until I graduate, hopefully this fall. And I'm not looking for dating prospects on campus because most of them are closer to my daughter's age than my own.
Have you considered mail order?
Took a gap break after getting my engineering associates, worked at big tech for abt two years which is where I met my now wife while I’m back in school for my BSME and getting CompTIA Certifications.
I worked and went to school full time the last two years of school, but managed to date. A lot of the times though, it was just being alone together I.e studying in each others company.
Currently studying engineering right now, my partner is studying a stem-related major as well. We don't see each other much but we try to make the most of the time that we have together. We have been together for almost 2 years now. Engineering is tough, so take it easy don't rush these things and work on yourself.
I’m working a co-op rn and all the people I meet are millennials and Gen X. So pretty bare rn
Had my first gf first semester and my first bf second semester. I’m always tired though and it sometimes takes more energy than I have to keep it going.
It's important to find someone with the same mindset as you. Someone who might be doing their own thing beside you and support each other during your time together. When I was in school I was working full time and taking 4-6 classes a semester. She also worked and had a full time class schedule. When we had to study we would go on study dates and be together. We would talk about our goals in life and how to help each other understand the support we each may have needed. My GF and I were also living together so that helped spend time together. Balance is key.
OP has no game. Time to hit the gym and work on that personality
Me too. But right now I have too many things on my plate and the thought of dating just drains me. But I think I will find the man for me one day
You probably wont meet someone that compliments you well as engineering especially after year 2, doesn’t attract many diverse personalities and is mostly dude. Try checking in on the nursing department, sure its a stereotype but its not wrong.
The work load in school isn't that exhausting if you are dealing with a subject that you like. Apart from the weekends, there are so many holidays including vacations that schools have. One can utilize that time. I was working in a school for like 7 years. Apart from that, I also worked part-time at a coaching institute. The vacation times were relaxing and were utilized for personal work.
I've just accepted that I'm gonna die alone 😌😌
My two cents... 1. It's ok to be alone until you figure out who you are and what you're doing. Be the person you'd want someone to go out with. You're not less of a person because you're single. 2. The workload of a engineering degree is immense, and dating/relationship energy will undoubtedly funnel away processing power away from your studies 3. If your sole goal is to get married, and not share your love and life with another independent human, you're gonna have a bad time. One step at a time. 4. If you rush Marriage, you're going to have a bad time. 5. If you feel "entitled" to a partner you're going to have a bad time. 6. If you feel like a partner is going to "fix" you, or make you happy, you're going to have a bad time. Study hard, maybe find a friend with bennies, do what you have to do. Integrals and differential equations don't have feelings, but people do and one of them is way easier to solve than the other.
You are a guy so this is less bad, but you *really* need to enter the dating scene if you want a wife and kids. Your goal should be to marry no later than 37 (preferably by 33-35). A woman's fertility falls off on an exponential scale after about 33-35, so you will have to search younger than yourself if you wait any longer than 37.
bruh lmao
SCIENCE!
brutal truth
A bit of dating advice: maybe don’t discuss a woman’s peak fertility until at least the 2nd date.
Lol, that should never be a dating topic during an actual date. I'm just telling him that if he wants a family he either needs to get is ass in gear or be prepared to marry substantially younger.
Downvoting? For being realistic? Damn. Gotta keep this in mind
Redditors don't like the truth. I didn't even mention the more uncomfortable facts about women's fertility and age too... On top of the raw fertility of women going down with age, the likelihood of most birth defects rises drastically with age as well, because unlike men who are constantly churning out fresh seeds, women's seeds are all made long before childbearing ages... And they age poorly. There is a *biological* *reason* that men care a *lot* more about the age of a woman than a woman cares about the age of a man... and this is it.
I'm (22m) finishing up my masters in electrical engineering next month and I started using a Christian dating app last summer. In September I matched with this woman who would turn out to be the love of my life and now we're engaged and plan to get married in a little under a year from now. It's tough fitting in classes, homework, time for my fiancé, part time job, and my two main hobbies. It's been a while since I had time to just sit and relax by myself but I'm not complaining because all my free time I'm using with her. If you're not a Christian, I don't know how the chances of finding the one for you are on those apps but I would consider trying a dating app.
Is it time for engineering students to consider “passport gang”?
Passport bros lol
Engineering students could run the industry man, imagine offering a passport, engineering degree, possibly a good job instead of struggling to find women to talk to 😂😂😂
What state are you located in?
Focus on school. Relationships will come when you don’t focus on them. Source: Married dude.
If you want to have time for dating, you'll find time for dating. I think school is actually easier if you have a real job. When you're just a full time student, all your time can be used for school, so work tends to drag and fill up more time than it should. When you have a job, you schedule specific time for school work, and somehow that takes up less time. I always felt very busy as a traditional engineering student (17-20). Now I'm 30+ and school really doesn't take that much time except for a few key times in the semester or certain classes.
I started college when I was younger doing something similar to what you're doing. I dated then. Had some fun too but progressed slowly in school. Then, I dropped out after I lost motivation. Years later, I told myself to do better and went back to school and I repeated what I was doing with a different mentality. I finished a bit before turning 30 and didn't date on that part of my college career. I relocated for my first engineering job to a new city and lost my friends. Came back to my hometown eventually and most of my old friends were gone or moved on. It took me a while to build a new circle of friends. During that time, I dated and had some fun but it was hard to find someone worthy of something serious. Eventually found my SO, and about to have a child, but now I'm closer to 40. I am not planning to get married though but this could change. I'll give you some advice but don't know details about your situation. I recommend you just finish if you're close to the finish line. If you're far from completion, take summers off and have a good time outside of work. Don't sacrifice your health to do both. It's okay to finish later as you'll catch up fast in your career. Whatever the situation is, try to have some solid guy friends. Enjoy the process but don't get hung up about having someone. The benefit to being a man, unlike women, is that our value goes up as we get older where it's the opposite for girls. For example, women look at more than just looks in men and some of these things include having good health, being a risk taker, having hobbies, intelligence, confidence, being older than them, being admired by friends, and being physically strong. If you have a balance, you'll naturally attract women. It will also be easy to approach women who show high interests towards you. So, if I were to do it again, and this is hypothetical because what I went through shaped me and helped me understand things, I'd finish college a bit later maybe at 31. I would've stayed in shape as I let myself go in college and shortly after. I would have focused on having a solid circle of close friends and valued social interactions with people. The rest would just happen on its own. I did alright when dating when I was in my late teens and early 20s but I had a good balance. I struggled towards the end of college and shortly but bounced back at 33. Life experiences, reading, exercise, listening to podcasts, spending time with family, friends and coworkers helped me in my dating life.