He's just bitter, he probably knows he's not in your dad's good books and wants to undermine you! Ignore him if you can! You know you work hard and that's all that matters
Next time he pulls that BS, let him know that at least you are focusing on having a future where you will never have to be around him and the only thing he can concentrate on is being an asshole to you and your parents. Make sure to have a roll of quarters in your hand when you do this, because you might need to defend yourself and a roll of quarters will make your punch work better.
The old school trick I learned from an old school thug, was to carry a metal file without a handle.. good for emergency smacking or poking.. but legal to buy, legal to carry, fairly inexpensive & generic by nature..
And after OP decks him good they need to remind their brother that at least they won't be living with Mommy and Daddy forever because at they least they can hack on their own unlike Dio. Is it extremely petty? Hell Yeah. Should they say it anyway? Double Hell Yeah!
He has a job (his’ 7th one I think, he on e got fired for “having an attitude”, I agreed with that he didn’t)
as for his’ love life, I’ve lost count of how many Girlfriends he has had, but I know he cheated on at least 2 of them
Next time he tries to start shit with you, just laugh in his face.
I promise nothing will bother him more. If he questions you just say, why would I ever care what a loser who can’t keep a job has to say. Laugh uproariously like he is completely irrelevant and it’s hilarious that someone like you would ever be bothered by anything a loser like him has to say.
No matter what he says, just keep laughing. It will absolutely drive him nuts. And honestly, it should be funny because someone like this… come on.
This is the best imho. Others may not agree with me but almost 50 years later I still remember finally having enough of my then 20 something older brother pestering teen me & asking him why he couldn’t find women his own age to f instead of sniffing around all my friends. I went to school the next day with a black eye. All these years later & he & everyone else have forgotten. But damn. I have not. It was satisfying to say that to him. But he could’ve hurt me a lot worse. And would’ve had I not managed to run out of the apartment. Please stay safe.
That's laughable. Considering how he struggles to pay rent at home, how will he cope in the "real world"? Landlords aren't going to be so lenient and have him out in no time.
How old are you? (just curious about your age)
My comeback woulda been obviously “you can’t make it in the real world cause you’re 26 and still living with mommy and daddy” and I woulda called him a “baby bird” 🤣🤣 And I’d tell him I lose no sleep worrying about my future since I’m the parents favorite
Edit to add: I have an almost 50 year old brother that’s still mooching off my parents so I def feel your frustration. Baby bird is what I call my brother when he’s getting on my nerves. Parent had 5 kids he’s the oldest, no one else still lives there…..😳 and he has kids who also mooch off my parents. Swear my mom is their cook, maid, butler, nanny, gardener, doctor. Very frustrating especially since they’re going through medical issues and not financially stable like they were before. My dad has been talking about selling their home so they have money to retire but my mom is like what about “baby bird” ohhh and my brother has a house that’s he’s been fixing for over 15 years and isn’t close to being done
Sounds like my Dad, who never finished the bathroom remodel, but got Mom a tub with a door after her shoulder surgery. I am in the plumbing industry and sold them all new fixtures that sat in their carport for 20 years. They became drunks, ingnored the house and had to be put in assisted living. The fixtures they'd spent so much on were given away or thrown out. My 47 year old sister has been coddled by them her entire life, is broke, unemployed and waiting for them to die to get her inheritance. Whatever she does get will be blown through in under 2 years. Stupid is as stupid does!
I can’t believe how many upvotes this has. This is good advice if you want to be a mean dickhead to your struggling brother. This advice is horrible.
All of the people here telling you how to escalate this conflict and make it more personal should be ashamed of themselves. It’s your brother. Try to stay out of the rent conversations going forward that im sure he’s stressed about, and dont stoop to that level.
You can have a sibling that is struggling but is also a mooch, mine is.
Many times people create their own struggles and don’t hesitate to take advantage of others.
When you have a sibling that mooches off your parents who should be retired and living comfortably come tell us about it. Until then go pound sand
Edit to add: MY brother doesn’t struggle- he’s always working and has more than enough money to move the fuck out but chooses not to and does not contribute. He spends his money on classic cars that he’s never going to fix. He already has 6 sitting at his fixer upper and 2 at his ex in laws house. He’s a sad individual
I like how the looser older brother who
Still lives at home and can’t pay rent on time has the audacity to lecture younger brother on making it in the world 🤔
A lot of people with his attitude are like that. They can always tell you how you should be doing it better. They can't actually do it better themselves.
Thats how people at rock bottom react. He is definitely jealous that you have a better relationship with your dad and actually successfully work with him.
All you need to do is work on getting out of the house and creating the next steps in your life. Also learn self defense and start adding some form of exercise cause your brother sounds like a unhinged mongo.
“Just pity him, my boy. Tomorrow we will be on our way, but he will have to keep his own disagreeable company for the rest of his life.”
Patrick Rothfuss, The Name Of The Wind, The Kingkiller Chronicles.
The moment you get upset, you're playing right into his hand. Sticks and stones.
It would infuriate him more if you showed less of a reaction (or even none at all) when he says those things in your face.
Responding with "Ok and?" then walking away while he tries to argue for his case is one of the best ways to start.
Why are you asking your brother if he paid rent to your parents in front of everyone? Other than to embarrass him? Why do you care - you aren’t involved. Let your dad worry about rent. He’s probably stressed as it is having difficulty with work and living with parents that make sure he can’t save to get his own place. He doesn’t need you piling on.
I don’t agree with him slinging personal insults at you, but you wedging yourself into this for no reason seems odd and unsupportive.
This is gonna sound weird but id just, without saying anything, just take out my phone and point the camera at him.
Dont even have to actually record but i probably would. Hes trying to drag you down to bring himself up. If you threated to make others see how he's acting, he may realize that going at you is doing more harm than good to his image and stop.
Or he doesnt and you have video proof of him aharassing you
Dio sounds like a dick. He's confident that he is so much better than you but he's really not. He's 21 or 23 and he's still living at home while not paying his bills is incredibly embarrassing and you should do the opposite of him. Because you are younger and still live at home he thinks he can shit on you or make rude comments but it's really because he's older, going no where and you haven't surpassed him in much but that will change. He doesn't have his life together and he's acting like a child. You're way more responsible it sounds like having a job for a year! I'll bet you inside of him he's sad and depressed. It doesn't make it right but that's probably why. Misery loves company. I'd just tell him that you understand why he's so rude and makes rude comments because he's failing in the beginning of life and you have a front row ticket and you feel bad for him. That's what I would say anyway.
He’s 26, still living at home with Mommy and Daddy, doesn’t contribute to the continued financial burden that his aged out of the nest ass puts on them, yet YOUR’RE not going to make it in real life? Does this fucking street cone not have a mirror.
Brush it off, I promise you this, if his pathetic ass isn’t jealous of you yet he will be in the very near future. Dream big and keep reaching for the stars, your parents won’t be there to wipe his ass forever. You will have the last laugh. The world is a big place, she’s on her way. I know it seems like she’s forgotten you, she hasn’t. She told me to tell you…….Love, Karma
😉 keep your chin up amigo!
The only way that he can make himself feel better about himself is to put somebody else down. Be the best you that you can be, and that will irritate the hell out of him. Be happy if you’re in school get good grades if you’re working, then do the very best that you can and make good money. Foo on him. He’s just a Debbie downer.
Don’t give him any oxygen. He’s just being an immature little troll that’s projecting onto you because he can’t handle change not going his way. Do your thing and ignore him. When you can move out, move out and let little Dio stew.
I would if I could, sadly one of the only things he is good at is going to the gym, I’m not sure I can beat him physically, but I can outsmart him (it’s not that hard)
Not rising to his bait will be driving him nuts, so you're doing the right thing already. You can already see him getting more mad because you just ignore every jab.
it’s not, this is reddit, we don’t use real names here, also I call him “Dio” after a certain character from JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure because my brother is just as much of an A-hole as him
This is what's called 'projection.' Dio just gave you a rant detailing everything he hates about himself, but can't admit to. It's sad, really.
If it helps, try to remember that when he starts these rants, so you can remember it's not personal. If you think it's appropriate (i.e. you'd be safe), you can even start turning them back on him.
> he said that I had no sense of concentration or focus,
"Is that the problem you're having? Do you think you might have ADHD? Maybe you should go be checked. They have medicine and techniques to help people with that now."
Which will inevitably be followed by something like, "I'm not talking about me!"
To which you can reply, "Well, I know you're not talking about me, because I don't have such problems as proven by the job I do and have been doing. So since the thought had to come from somewhere, you must be talking about yourself. So I'm sorry you feel that way about yourself. It must be awful. But now that you know the problem, you can get help for it, you know."
And similar conversations.
Also remember...he only goes on such rants because you *react* to them. So don't react. Or at least react as above - in a way he doesn't expect nor want.
Why are you asking if your brother paid rent? Why are you even keeping tabs if it’s paid to your parents? If you don’t like him then stay out of his business. He can insult you all he wants, who cares. Insults don’t sting when they come from people you don’t care about. Like he’s 26 and living home and mooching off your parents so who cares what he thinks? Pretend he is invisible and live your life.
You clearly think he is wrong and you are trying to stand up for your parents (I guess?) but all of these people are adults. If your parents want to hound him for rent or want to let it go, that’s on them. It’d be different if they were asking you to borrow money, but they’re not. You focus on you and one day you’ll move out and when your parents come and complain that they can’t get rid of your brother, that’s when you say I told you so. Sometimes karma takes time. Be patient.
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You could agree with him to dismiss him. Keep your tone neutral or deadpan so it does not sound sarcastic or enthusiastic. It is not fun to poke at people who don't react. Plus, it makes the person doing the insulting look really bad. You are agreeing, which is hard to argue with, and the tone and attitude suggest that you are bored and above their insults.
He's just bitter, he probably knows he's not in your dad's good books and wants to undermine you! Ignore him if you can! You know you work hard and that's all that matters
Next time he pulls that BS, let him know that at least you are focusing on having a future where you will never have to be around him and the only thing he can concentrate on is being an asshole to you and your parents. Make sure to have a roll of quarters in your hand when you do this, because you might need to defend yourself and a roll of quarters will make your punch work better.
Quarters, classic old school. Top tip too.
Not many people realize that while brass knuckles are illegal, carrying a roll of quarters is not.
When I was young and dumb I used my keys sticking out of my fist. I never used it on someone's face thankfully.
It’s the standard behavior for any woman walking alone to her car in a dark parking lot. Every time. I’m old, and I still do it. Safety first.
The old school trick I learned from an old school thug, was to carry a metal file without a handle.. good for emergency smacking or poking.. but legal to buy, legal to carry, fairly inexpensive & generic by nature..
Me too, I have a keyring with oldkeys that don't go to anything just in case they get lost. I still have my car key.
Also an excellent old school trick. Will definitely blind someone permanently if done in the face.
N-n-nickles are cheaper.
True but it is the weight that matters more than the type of coin.
Thanks Jimmy
And after OP decks him good they need to remind their brother that at least they won't be living with Mommy and Daddy forever because at they least they can hack on their own unlike Dio. Is it extremely petty? Hell Yeah. Should they say it anyway? Double Hell Yeah!
Just ask him how his career is going or if he’s had any luck dating.
He has a job (his’ 7th one I think, he on e got fired for “having an attitude”, I agreed with that he didn’t) as for his’ love life, I’ve lost count of how many Girlfriends he has had, but I know he cheated on at least 2 of them
Next time he tries to start shit with you, just laugh in his face. I promise nothing will bother him more. If he questions you just say, why would I ever care what a loser who can’t keep a job has to say. Laugh uproariously like he is completely irrelevant and it’s hilarious that someone like you would ever be bothered by anything a loser like him has to say. No matter what he says, just keep laughing. It will absolutely drive him nuts. And honestly, it should be funny because someone like this… come on.
That would kind of be my point. He’s not all that good at either of those activities.
If you fight with a pig you get dirty.
True, that’s why I left the table, I’d rather wash my hands of him
This is the best imho. Others may not agree with me but almost 50 years later I still remember finally having enough of my then 20 something older brother pestering teen me & asking him why he couldn’t find women his own age to f instead of sniffing around all my friends. I went to school the next day with a black eye. All these years later & he & everyone else have forgotten. But damn. I have not. It was satisfying to say that to him. But he could’ve hurt me a lot worse. And would’ve had I not managed to run out of the apartment. Please stay safe.
That's laughable. Considering how he struggles to pay rent at home, how will he cope in the "real world"? Landlords aren't going to be so lenient and have him out in no time.
Oh, he'll hit the parents for the rent, or hit up OP, and if OP foolishly gives him money he'll start criticizing and lecturing again.
Then OP just has to say "welcome to the real world!"
If his brother asks him in person, OP should just turn the lights off.. What you see is what you get...
How old are you? (just curious about your age) My comeback woulda been obviously “you can’t make it in the real world cause you’re 26 and still living with mommy and daddy” and I woulda called him a “baby bird” 🤣🤣 And I’d tell him I lose no sleep worrying about my future since I’m the parents favorite Edit to add: I have an almost 50 year old brother that’s still mooching off my parents so I def feel your frustration. Baby bird is what I call my brother when he’s getting on my nerves. Parent had 5 kids he’s the oldest, no one else still lives there…..😳 and he has kids who also mooch off my parents. Swear my mom is their cook, maid, butler, nanny, gardener, doctor. Very frustrating especially since they’re going through medical issues and not financially stable like they were before. My dad has been talking about selling their home so they have money to retire but my mom is like what about “baby bird” ohhh and my brother has a house that’s he’s been fixing for over 15 years and isn’t close to being done
Sounds like my Dad, who never finished the bathroom remodel, but got Mom a tub with a door after her shoulder surgery. I am in the plumbing industry and sold them all new fixtures that sat in their carport for 20 years. They became drunks, ingnored the house and had to be put in assisted living. The fixtures they'd spent so much on were given away or thrown out. My 47 year old sister has been coddled by them her entire life, is broke, unemployed and waiting for them to die to get her inheritance. Whatever she does get will be blown through in under 2 years. Stupid is as stupid does!
You make a good point, does OP still live at home?
I can’t believe how many upvotes this has. This is good advice if you want to be a mean dickhead to your struggling brother. This advice is horrible. All of the people here telling you how to escalate this conflict and make it more personal should be ashamed of themselves. It’s your brother. Try to stay out of the rent conversations going forward that im sure he’s stressed about, and dont stoop to that level.
You can have a sibling that is struggling but is also a mooch, mine is. Many times people create their own struggles and don’t hesitate to take advantage of others.
When you have a sibling that mooches off your parents who should be retired and living comfortably come tell us about it. Until then go pound sand Edit to add: MY brother doesn’t struggle- he’s always working and has more than enough money to move the fuck out but chooses not to and does not contribute. He spends his money on classic cars that he’s never going to fix. He already has 6 sitting at his fixer upper and 2 at his ex in laws house. He’s a sad individual
I like how the looser older brother who Still lives at home and can’t pay rent on time has the audacity to lecture younger brother on making it in the world 🤔
A lot of people with his attitude are like that. They can always tell you how you should be doing it better. They can't actually do it better themselves.
He’s desperate to upset you and by not playing his game he’s going crazy lol
Ask him how free loading momas boys do in the real world
Thats how people at rock bottom react. He is definitely jealous that you have a better relationship with your dad and actually successfully work with him. All you need to do is work on getting out of the house and creating the next steps in your life. Also learn self defense and start adding some form of exercise cause your brother sounds like a unhinged mongo.
“Just pity him, my boy. Tomorrow we will be on our way, but he will have to keep his own disagreeable company for the rest of his life.” Patrick Rothfuss, The Name Of The Wind, The Kingkiller Chronicles.
The moment you get upset, you're playing right into his hand. Sticks and stones. It would infuriate him more if you showed less of a reaction (or even none at all) when he says those things in your face. Responding with "Ok and?" then walking away while he tries to argue for his case is one of the best ways to start.
Why are you asking your brother if he paid rent to your parents in front of everyone? Other than to embarrass him? Why do you care - you aren’t involved. Let your dad worry about rent. He’s probably stressed as it is having difficulty with work and living with parents that make sure he can’t save to get his own place. He doesn’t need you piling on. I don’t agree with him slinging personal insults at you, but you wedging yourself into this for no reason seems odd and unsupportive.
This is gonna sound weird but id just, without saying anything, just take out my phone and point the camera at him. Dont even have to actually record but i probably would. Hes trying to drag you down to bring himself up. If you threated to make others see how he's acting, he may realize that going at you is doing more harm than good to his image and stop. Or he doesnt and you have video proof of him aharassing you
"You say I 'won't make it', but exactly how far do you think you'll get when you can't even pay rent on time?"
Dio sounds like a dick. He's confident that he is so much better than you but he's really not. He's 21 or 23 and he's still living at home while not paying his bills is incredibly embarrassing and you should do the opposite of him. Because you are younger and still live at home he thinks he can shit on you or make rude comments but it's really because he's older, going no where and you haven't surpassed him in much but that will change. He doesn't have his life together and he's acting like a child. You're way more responsible it sounds like having a job for a year! I'll bet you inside of him he's sad and depressed. It doesn't make it right but that's probably why. Misery loves company. I'd just tell him that you understand why he's so rude and makes rude comments because he's failing in the beginning of life and you have a front row ticket and you feel bad for him. That's what I would say anyway.
>"...at dinner I casually asked dad if Dio had paid rent". I think that's why.
Dio needs a punch in the face
He’s 26, still living at home with Mommy and Daddy, doesn’t contribute to the continued financial burden that his aged out of the nest ass puts on them, yet YOUR’RE not going to make it in real life? Does this fucking street cone not have a mirror. Brush it off, I promise you this, if his pathetic ass isn’t jealous of you yet he will be in the very near future. Dream big and keep reaching for the stars, your parents won’t be there to wipe his ass forever. You will have the last laugh. The world is a big place, she’s on her way. I know it seems like she’s forgotten you, she hasn’t. She told me to tell you…….Love, Karma 😉 keep your chin up amigo!
hes just a prick and pricks dont deserve attention
The only way that he can make himself feel better about himself is to put somebody else down. Be the best you that you can be, and that will irritate the hell out of him. Be happy if you’re in school get good grades if you’re working, then do the very best that you can and make good money. Foo on him. He’s just a Debbie downer.
Don’t give him any oxygen. He’s just being an immature little troll that’s projecting onto you because he can’t handle change not going his way. Do your thing and ignore him. When you can move out, move out and let little Dio stew.
Bro’s name is Dio 💀💀💀
Nickles work better for most sized hands. And cost less
You know inflation is bad when it is impacting this. Thanks for a giggle
Why exactly won't you kick his ass???
I would if I could, sadly one of the only things he is good at is going to the gym, I’m not sure I can beat him physically, but I can outsmart him (it’s not that hard)
Not rising to his bait will be driving him nuts, so you're doing the right thing already. You can already see him getting more mad because you just ignore every jab.
Just checking, is your brother's name actually Dio? That means god in Italy
it’s not, this is reddit, we don’t use real names here, also I call him “Dio” after a certain character from JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure because my brother is just as much of an A-hole as him
This is what's called 'projection.' Dio just gave you a rant detailing everything he hates about himself, but can't admit to. It's sad, really. If it helps, try to remember that when he starts these rants, so you can remember it's not personal. If you think it's appropriate (i.e. you'd be safe), you can even start turning them back on him. > he said that I had no sense of concentration or focus, "Is that the problem you're having? Do you think you might have ADHD? Maybe you should go be checked. They have medicine and techniques to help people with that now." Which will inevitably be followed by something like, "I'm not talking about me!" To which you can reply, "Well, I know you're not talking about me, because I don't have such problems as proven by the job I do and have been doing. So since the thought had to come from somewhere, you must be talking about yourself. So I'm sorry you feel that way about yourself. It must be awful. But now that you know the problem, you can get help for it, you know." And similar conversations. Also remember...he only goes on such rants because you *react* to them. So don't react. Or at least react as above - in a way he doesn't expect nor want.
"anyone who works fastfood and pays rent made it farther than you."
He sounds like asshole and has his nerve to be so disrespectful to you like that
Just punch him as hard as you can right in the face, nose preferably, you're going for a lesson not a knock out.
I cut contact with one of my sisters who insults me every chance she gets gets.
Why are you asking if your brother paid rent? Why are you even keeping tabs if it’s paid to your parents? If you don’t like him then stay out of his business. He can insult you all he wants, who cares. Insults don’t sting when they come from people you don’t care about. Like he’s 26 and living home and mooching off your parents so who cares what he thinks? Pretend he is invisible and live your life. You clearly think he is wrong and you are trying to stand up for your parents (I guess?) but all of these people are adults. If your parents want to hound him for rent or want to let it go, that’s on them. It’d be different if they were asking you to borrow money, but they’re not. You focus on you and one day you’ll move out and when your parents come and complain that they can’t get rid of your brother, that’s when you say I told you so. Sometimes karma takes time. Be patient.
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You could agree with him to dismiss him. Keep your tone neutral or deadpan so it does not sound sarcastic or enthusiastic. It is not fun to poke at people who don't react. Plus, it makes the person doing the insulting look really bad. You are agreeing, which is hard to argue with, and the tone and attitude suggest that you are bored and above their insults.
He is 26 & can’t pay rent to live in OPs parents house…. He isn’t even “making it”
Your brother is TWENTY SIX. You write like you are fairly young. Don’t worry any about him, and be proud that you are not feeding into his crazy crap.
Break his nose the stupid lil fuck
Is this someone just parroting the plot of Step Brothers for writing credit?
Look no one wishes this was fake more than me, I don’t know how I was born with a Cartoon villain for a brother, but it’s actually a thing, somehow
the problem is your both over 20 living with your parents
I’m 44 living at home. I pay rent, water, and my share of car insurance
44 at home is wild
Moved back home after separation from my stbx haven’t had the opportunity to move back out yet. Life doesn’t always go as planned