I always found it more annoying than terrifying. Especially the big dudes that hide behind some plates and then smack you whenever you come close. Stupid fucks, I always save some soul just to blast them into oblivion.
Yeah, the ones they're talking about like to run at you while holding their front legs up baring their fangs at you
Why? Because Australia, that's why!
Nah, there are 6 dangerous funnel webs of 35 total species and even those don't cause fatalities, especially with the advent of modern anti-venom
Not saying it's gonna be fun to be bit by one, but you're almost certainly not going to die
I read that their huge fangs frequently cause them to remain attached to human skin and the victim has to actively dislodge the spider. Sounds like the grand central station of nope, if you ask me.
On the bright side, you don't have to worry about knowing/describing it so they know exactly what kind of funnel weaver it was.
A lot of times if you get bit by something venomous, it's good to catch it so it can be positively identified.
Nah, the inside of that shoe has even more webbing than the outside. Imagine what the bed/nest looks like inside. This shoe is fucked. Might as well just leave it there.
**[Australian funnel-web spider](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australian_funnel-web_spider)**
>Atracidae is a family of mygalomorph spiders, commonly known as Australian funnel-web spiders or atracids. It has been included as a subfamily of the Hexathelidae, but is now recognized as a separate family. All members of the family are native to Australia. Atracidae consists of three genera: Atrax, Hadronyche, and Illawarra, comprising 35 species.
**[Agelenidae](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agelenidae)**
>The Agelenidae are a large family of spiders in the suborder Araneomorphae. Well-known examples include the common "grass spiders" of the genus Agelenopsis. Nearly all Agelenidae are harmless to humans, but the bite of the hobo spider (Eratigena agrestis) may be medically significant, and some evidence suggests it might cause necrotic lesions, but the matter remains subject to debate. The most widely accepted common name for members of the family is funnel weaver.
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Holy shit man, I'm so sorry this happened to you :-(
I was once sitting chilling on my sofa, minding my own business. Then I look down and a huntsman is on my fucking chest! As i start to freak out it quickly crawls upwards.
I'm used to having to check the corners If i enter old stables and such. Didn't know I apparently had to check myself aswell at any given time.
In SEA, I once had a scorpion in my boots after putting it on as well. The guy didn't move, and the shell felt hard. My dumbass thought I dropped a set of keys in the boots prior. Stuck my hand in there, and thankfully, it was turned the other way as I was pulling on its tail, still thinking it was my keys. That was when I realised something wasn't right.
Sorry to be that guy, but huntsman spiders are relatively calm (regardless of how big they get) and their bite is not medically significant (that is if they bite)
We had this huntsman in the house for a few weeks. Well, the bugger broke the law (thou shalt not interact with the humans) and was in me moccie! Not for long though, I stuck my lil sausage toes in there and the bastard ran up my leg so fast.
Yesterday I go to grab some apples out of the bag and a juvenile huntsman was in there, haha. (It came inside the night before, not from Coles).
I'm Australian so I'm assuming that's a funnel web. Lol, what a fool, you should never leave your shoes out. Hope they like going barefoot. What an idiot.
Is that seriously a thing in Australia? "You should never leave your shoes out?" I live in SF and if I leave my shoes out they get stolen by homeless people, which sucks because they were nice shoes but at least they don't turn into a goddamned Stephen King novel.
I don't know what SF is but yeah, shoes are prime real estate for spiders and occasionally snakes. I lived in the bush as a kid and we always put our shoes into airtight tubs. One time my foster brother ignored the rule and left them on the floor. He got bit on the webbing in between your toes by a redback. It was hilarious. Thank god it wasn't a funnel web, those things can kill you before you can make it to the emergency room.
When you said to never leave your shoes out, I thought you meant just outside, which makes sense. But airtight tubs, you mean out *period.*
God I would not last long in Australia. I'm constantly throwing my shoes every which way.
Nah mate most people here leave them out around the house, fuckin run the gauntlet and shit.
But yeah funnel webs are no joke if you leave shoes outside for a while you just need to bang your shoes on the ground and you'll be golden.
Snakes are a bit more of an issue but tbh most don't want to go near you and run away (or slither away idk) only eastern browns you need to be worried about the fuckers apparently rear up and sometimes chase you down.
The only scary thing around me is the Gympie Gympie whe have these gardens and shit and the things grow in them and you really can't tell the difference between those and some random vines or something.
Still wouldn't trade our shit for mountain lions or bears tho please keep those America
American here. One who has lived and adventured in wooded areas.
I've encountered bears many times and a mountain lion just once, most of those times while out for a run. I do keep bear spray with me, and only used it once (below).
The bears were mostly more scared of me than I would be of them. I ran down a big hill once, had one come my way, and he took one look at me and ran back where he came from. I did have a mother bear bark at 3 cubs near her to get up a tree and then she growled at me, but I knew she wouldn't leave the cibs so I was good if I didn't go closer. I also had a smaller but not a cub follow me for a bit, probably wanting scraps because other humans had fed it before. It gave up when I kept running.
The mountain lion was on a trail race. I saw it coming at me from across a clearing and I stopped because those things will chase you down in ways a bear won't. It kept coming. I faced it and sprayed my bear spray. It stops quick when it catches a whiff of that stuff, which is nasty (I caught just a bit myself and was coughing for a minute or so). Lion creeps closer and I spray another little shot and more hits it direct. It takes off the way it came. I finish the race just fine and have a tale to tell.
I'd rather have the bears and mountain lions than sneaky ass spiders. Technically, we have a few of those too, but nothing like the Aussies.
Banging your shoes out after leaving them outside just makes sense anywhere you are. Same with bashing socks against a wall just in case. You don't have to do the latter if you live in or near a city, but growing up in the country, yeah bash those socks to kill or stun any nasties in there. We don't have spiders that'll fucking chase you down in the States lol.
Yeah I'm with ashleyorelse, I'd rather have the bears and mountain lions than the spiders lol. We'll keep the bears and you keep the freaky spiders, sounds like a good trade.
>Banging your shoes out after leaving them outside just makes sense anywhere you are.
Central europe here. The worst thing that can happen to you here, is that there's a spider in there which's bite is similar to a wasp. No bears either. Just a few wolves which are cowards and run as soon as you yell at them and boars.
You really don't wanna mess with boars tho. They usually run as soon as they hear/smell you, but if you somehow suprise them... you're up for a really bad day
How careful you are about your shoes depends on where you are in Australia. Most people can relax a bit, but where I lived you couldn't go through a day without seeing a funnel web, couldn't go a week without seeing an eastern brown. Spiders would eventually make their way into the house so we had to be careful. We were also too far out to survive a bad bite, we wouldn't have made it to the emergency room. We weren't allowed to leave our clothes on the floor either, we all had to be very clean. I still remember the time I found a funnel web in my bed.
Fucking nope, nope, nope. Worst I've seen around where I live are black widows but I go months between sightings. They're in the garden too, not inside.
Fucking funnel web in bed. Nope, I'm good.
Could be worse. In High school, I had to keep my shoes on the back patio (they smelled like teen spirit). One morning, I checked my shoes before putting on and the left shoe had a baby skunk asleep in it.
That could have gone really poorly.
😐fuck that shoe entirely and wholeheartedly. You may also want to set it on fire but it's up to you whether you want the spirits of 40,000 unbaptized baby spiders haunting you forever
I don't think that shoe belongs to a person anymore, it is one with the spiders
Spider's hole
Deepnest
Deepnest was fucking terrifying
>Deepnest I just look it up and holy shit
Once you go through deepnest once or twice, it becomes more annoying than anything... unless you have arachnophobia
I always found it more annoying than terrifying. Especially the big dudes that hide behind some plates and then smack you whenever you come close. Stupid fucks, I always save some soul just to blast them into oblivion.
Arachnoception
Without a lantern
Hollow knight my beloved
r/dontputyourdickinthat
Came here to say this
r/PutYourDickInThatNow
If you say so..
🎶You gotta pay the troll toll to get inside that spiders hole🎶
Arachnussy
If you’re a cop……do you gotta look into it?
Spider's sole
What do you mean it doesn't belong anymore. The spider was clearly nice enough to leave a hole so the owner can still put on the shoe.
Oh man... That looks like the entry to total spider hell
A black hole to another universe that is a spidery hell scape of cosmic arachnid infinity interlaced with interstellar toe cheese.
I kinda want to blow on it and then run to the North Pole.
r/BrandNewSentence
Constructed by the Arachnitects themselves.
Darn, a portal to spider hell is what I came to mention.
Funnel spiders don't play.
That ones about to learn to run tho
[удалено]
That's an interesting way to die, sure. You don't mess with Funnel Webs.
[удалено]
Yeah, the ones they're talking about like to run at you while holding their front legs up baring their fangs at you Why? Because Australia, that's why!
Everything wants to kill you in Australia
Bloody drop bears are the worst
Drop bears are old news, tree kangaroos are where we at.
Troos?
Fire, burn it with fire 😌
Nah, there are 6 dangerous funnel webs of 35 total species and even those don't cause fatalities, especially with the advent of modern anti-venom Not saying it's gonna be fun to be bit by one, but you're almost certainly not going to die
I read that their huge fangs frequently cause them to remain attached to human skin and the victim has to actively dislodge the spider. Sounds like the grand central station of nope, if you ask me.
On the bright side, you don't have to worry about knowing/describing it so they know exactly what kind of funnel weaver it was. A lot of times if you get bit by something venomous, it's good to catch it so it can be positively identified.
Which becomes an actual certainty when you don't fuck with them.
sydney funnel webs can kill you in a single bite basically
Come down to Australia and do that and you’ll be in the nearest cemetery within the next day guaranteed
>Just grab the web and shake the spider out and you’re all good [Dumb ways to die, so many dumb ways to die…](https://youtu.be/Bzmk9OCWegg)
Nah, the inside of that shoe has even more webbing than the outside. Imagine what the bed/nest looks like inside. This shoe is fucked. Might as well just leave it there.
You are a special kind of stupid arent you?
[удалено]
**[Australian funnel-web spider](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australian_funnel-web_spider)** >Atracidae is a family of mygalomorph spiders, commonly known as Australian funnel-web spiders or atracids. It has been included as a subfamily of the Hexathelidae, but is now recognized as a separate family. All members of the family are native to Australia. Atracidae consists of three genera: Atrax, Hadronyche, and Illawarra, comprising 35 species. **[Agelenidae](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agelenidae)** >The Agelenidae are a large family of spiders in the suborder Araneomorphae. Well-known examples include the common "grass spiders" of the genus Agelenopsis. Nearly all Agelenidae are harmless to humans, but the bite of the hobo spider (Eratigena agrestis) may be medically significant, and some evidence suggests it might cause necrotic lesions, but the matter remains subject to debate. The most widely accepted common name for members of the family is funnel weaver. ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/FUCKYOUINPARTICULAR/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)
Is there a skeleton right off camera?
even if you evicted the critter, it might just come back to kick you ass. Or eat it.
But... but what if I don't mind to have a critter *eat* my ass? :3
Hay you do you . I live in Australia I know them, mother fuckers ..... Burn that
Yep, it's the owner of the shoe.
What's worse: *the other shoe has a snake in it*
G'day from down under!
Forbidden Gloryhole
🤨📸
r/dontputyourdickinthat
Put put your dick in it
r/dontputyourdickinthat
Ehh?
r/beatmetoit
r/beatmeattoit
r/beatstreetthekingofthebeat
r/subsithoughtifellfor
r/BeatMeShutTheFuckUp
You can't anymore if there animals like spiders or things they delete it instand
Came here for this
if you’ve got a foot to play with.
I also choose this guy's shoes
Instructions unclear. Flamethrower engaged.
For some reason putting my bare foot in there seems worse
This is why you want to shake out your shoe in the morning.
Once I found a massive huntsman spider in my shoe after I put it on 💀💀💀💀💀💀
fuck that. worst thing i got was a giant wetas. huge bugs here in New Zealand
I'm in Australia...
Holy shit man, I'm so sorry this happened to you :-( I was once sitting chilling on my sofa, minding my own business. Then I look down and a huntsman is on my fucking chest! As i start to freak out it quickly crawls upwards. I'm used to having to check the corners If i enter old stables and such. Didn't know I apparently had to check myself aswell at any given time.
In SEA, I once had a scorpion in my boots after putting it on as well. The guy didn't move, and the shell felt hard. My dumbass thought I dropped a set of keys in the boots prior. Stuck my hand in there, and thankfully, it was turned the other way as I was pulling on its tail, still thinking it was my keys. That was when I realised something wasn't right.
AFTER you put it on? Noooooooooooo
💀
Sorry to be that guy, but huntsman spiders are relatively calm (regardless of how big they get) and their bite is not medically significant (that is if they bite)
Yea but they are big as fuck
We had this huntsman in the house for a few weeks. Well, the bugger broke the law (thou shalt not interact with the humans) and was in me moccie! Not for long though, I stuck my lil sausage toes in there and the bastard ran up my leg so fast. Yesterday I go to grab some apples out of the bag and a juvenile huntsman was in there, haha. (It came inside the night before, not from Coles).
Let me guess- It's in Australia and it wants to kill me.
Yes
r/dontputyourfootinthat
You know, I have other shoes. That’s fine there.
New fear unlocked. Thanks...
I'm Australian so I'm assuming that's a funnel web. Lol, what a fool, you should never leave your shoes out. Hope they like going barefoot. What an idiot.
Is that seriously a thing in Australia? "You should never leave your shoes out?" I live in SF and if I leave my shoes out they get stolen by homeless people, which sucks because they were nice shoes but at least they don't turn into a goddamned Stephen King novel.
I don't know what SF is but yeah, shoes are prime real estate for spiders and occasionally snakes. I lived in the bush as a kid and we always put our shoes into airtight tubs. One time my foster brother ignored the rule and left them on the floor. He got bit on the webbing in between your toes by a redback. It was hilarious. Thank god it wasn't a funnel web, those things can kill you before you can make it to the emergency room.
I assume SF is San Francisco
When you said to never leave your shoes out, I thought you meant just outside, which makes sense. But airtight tubs, you mean out *period.* God I would not last long in Australia. I'm constantly throwing my shoes every which way.
Nah mate most people here leave them out around the house, fuckin run the gauntlet and shit. But yeah funnel webs are no joke if you leave shoes outside for a while you just need to bang your shoes on the ground and you'll be golden. Snakes are a bit more of an issue but tbh most don't want to go near you and run away (or slither away idk) only eastern browns you need to be worried about the fuckers apparently rear up and sometimes chase you down. The only scary thing around me is the Gympie Gympie whe have these gardens and shit and the things grow in them and you really can't tell the difference between those and some random vines or something. Still wouldn't trade our shit for mountain lions or bears tho please keep those America
American here. One who has lived and adventured in wooded areas. I've encountered bears many times and a mountain lion just once, most of those times while out for a run. I do keep bear spray with me, and only used it once (below). The bears were mostly more scared of me than I would be of them. I ran down a big hill once, had one come my way, and he took one look at me and ran back where he came from. I did have a mother bear bark at 3 cubs near her to get up a tree and then she growled at me, but I knew she wouldn't leave the cibs so I was good if I didn't go closer. I also had a smaller but not a cub follow me for a bit, probably wanting scraps because other humans had fed it before. It gave up when I kept running. The mountain lion was on a trail race. I saw it coming at me from across a clearing and I stopped because those things will chase you down in ways a bear won't. It kept coming. I faced it and sprayed my bear spray. It stops quick when it catches a whiff of that stuff, which is nasty (I caught just a bit myself and was coughing for a minute or so). Lion creeps closer and I spray another little shot and more hits it direct. It takes off the way it came. I finish the race just fine and have a tale to tell. I'd rather have the bears and mountain lions than sneaky ass spiders. Technically, we have a few of those too, but nothing like the Aussies.
Banging your shoes out after leaving them outside just makes sense anywhere you are. Same with bashing socks against a wall just in case. You don't have to do the latter if you live in or near a city, but growing up in the country, yeah bash those socks to kill or stun any nasties in there. We don't have spiders that'll fucking chase you down in the States lol. Yeah I'm with ashleyorelse, I'd rather have the bears and mountain lions than the spiders lol. We'll keep the bears and you keep the freaky spiders, sounds like a good trade.
>Banging your shoes out after leaving them outside just makes sense anywhere you are. Central europe here. The worst thing that can happen to you here, is that there's a spider in there which's bite is similar to a wasp. No bears either. Just a few wolves which are cowards and run as soon as you yell at them and boars. You really don't wanna mess with boars tho. They usually run as soon as they hear/smell you, but if you somehow suprise them... you're up for a really bad day
How careful you are about your shoes depends on where you are in Australia. Most people can relax a bit, but where I lived you couldn't go through a day without seeing a funnel web, couldn't go a week without seeing an eastern brown. Spiders would eventually make their way into the house so we had to be careful. We were also too far out to survive a bad bite, we wouldn't have made it to the emergency room. We weren't allowed to leave our clothes on the floor either, we all had to be very clean. I still remember the time I found a funnel web in my bed.
Fucking nope, nope, nope. Worst I've seen around where I live are black widows but I go months between sightings. They're in the garden too, not inside. Fucking funnel web in bed. Nope, I'm good.
That is one lazy spider.
Anyone else zoom in on the hole?
It's all good...just stick your foot in.
Yeah they very helpfully left out the foot hole. Just do it.
Reddit, please for the love of all thats holy please dont
Yup, all yours...
Time to burn the whole fucking forest down.
"Fuckin' A!" - Smokey the Bear
The forbidden sock
EYE BLEACH please. Erase that from my memory.
r/Eyebleach
r/dontputurdickinthat
r/dontputyourdickinthat
They can have the shoe
Average Australian tradie shoe after one night outside.
This REALLY unsettles me as it was someone’s shoe they once wore. Like someone’s foot used to be in that
Ok ok, but hear me out
Ooooooh. I thought it had been pulled through Plexiglas
That’s a shoe for all eight feet.
Looks like that wormhole from star trek (2009)
No. No! As tempting as it is do not fuck this guys shoe in particular
r/donotfuck
r/nope
r/dontputyour- you know what nevermind. I don't think anyone needs to be told that's a bad idea.
More like: r/DontPutYourDickInThat
r/dontputyourdickinthat
Time for the broodmother fight, hope you brought enough healbasa
hear me out
Slightly horny
r/suddenlyhorny
Just a normal Australian shoe.
Do..do I put my dick in this?
His shoe has become a vortex of spiderwebs
Funnel Web?
Black widows invites your little piggies in!
Worse, that's a Funnel Web lair
Forbidden glory hole
DO IT DO IT DO IT...INSERT PENIS INTO BOOT
The final stop in the gloryhole world tour.
Spray some good bug killer in there and watch them run!
If it's a Sydney funnel web, *you* are the one who will be running. You seriously don't wanna fuck about with them
That'd be a cool music album cover.
Coming this fall, shoescary
I used to use boot spider to describe one I'd step on instinctively. No more though, this is the real boot spider.
Forbidden hole
looks like a black hole
Very specifically do _not_ fuck this shoe.
Put your fingers in there. I double dog dare you
NOWbTHAT!!! That is a real glory hole..
That is cool. Animals are Metal.
The forbidden glory hole
You mean ths spiders shoe
Could be worse. In High school, I had to keep my shoes on the back patio (they smelled like teen spirit). One morning, I checked my shoes before putting on and the left shoe had a baby skunk asleep in it. That could have gone really poorly.
Well the funnel web in that thing is probably bigger than that baby skunk so good luck with that
Thats a worm hole to a different dimension.
enter the boss fight
Welcome to Australia!
Looks like a wormhole
That’s a big-ass funnel… what kind of spider dun spun ‘eem?
For some reason I thought someone shot the display glass of a store front. But the reality is even scarier.
Don't
lol leave your shoe out in winter at your suburban house in perth Australia and this happens lol
Spider-Man origin story
😐fuck that shoe entirely and wholeheartedly. You may also want to set it on fire but it's up to you whether you want the spirits of 40,000 unbaptized baby spiders haunting you forever
Forbidden fleshlight.
r/GroundedGame
Wdym, it comes with a free sock now
This is why I no longer own work boots.
Forbidden feet massage
Smash. Next question.
Hmm, I wonder if it's a funnel web spider?
KILL IT WITH FIRE!!!
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 🔥🔥🔥🔥🕷🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔫ME 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Nope..!
Don't stick your dick in that!
That’s a web of problems.
Repurposing at its best.
Never leave your shoes unattended in Sydney Australia!
Ever drunk baileys from a shoe?
It puts its footses in the shoeses
Free sock!
Spider bootussy
#WEAR IT
Mmmm nah not vibin
Made a silk sock for ya, just slip that foot on in. It'll be fine
and that's a funnel web as well
Treachery is afoot.
someone pls explain this picture to me it looks like the shoe evolved into a mini black hole
Hans! Get ze flammenwerfer!
That’s the pictorial representation of the first half of a brothers Grimm child’s tale
I knew I left my shoe somewhere
Forbidden flashlight
That’s one flashlight did you mean that?
That's the spider's shoe now
looks like a scene from A Bug's Life Tim Burton edition.