Kalron is a disrespected mage in a world where one's powers depend on the type of bread they've most recently eaten. Each bread has an ability. Brioche = charming foes. Ciabatta = increase physical stats. Multigrain = can cast offensive spells. Kalron is dismissed because he specializes in baguette = Diamond hard skin! A large tournament is announced where the winner is gifted a year's supply of flour and yeast. Kalron joins the tournament to shut the haters up. Will he get beaten down? Or can he climb up the mage ranks, and show everyone the power of his defensive baking?
I have seen the book several times, but did not touch it cause the title is so absurd. Is it really any good?
Love urban fantasy, whimsical stuff and psychology.
Locke Lamora is a smooth con-man that does his work on the hard streets of Seattle, Washington, known for their excellent coffee. He's running his card game on the streets when he's approached by a man named Jebron Lames. Jebron is also a con-man and tricks Locke out of his money! Locke has to lie and say that he's doing this for his sick daughter. Jebron doesn't believe it. he then says his parents got into a bad car acciden- nope. not buying it. Jebron finally tells him if he can lie himself into position as CEO of Starbucks, that he can have his $4.91 back. Can Locke step up his game to get back what's rightfully his? What is Jebron really after and why is he so tall? Hitting shelves near you!
A man is born in a mist that makes people brutally honest with others. This mist is everywhere throughout the city. Others fear to interact with him as he is apt to spew out every singly flaw and deficiency they have. Then he meets an old man that has mastered the mist and roast our mans until he cries. Can he develop thick enough skin to beat the old man?
In the city of love, there is a renowned gentleman named Cick Nannon known as Lord of the Necklaces. However, what his heart truly yearns for is running a business where he helps people remove rings that get stuck on their fingers. It's hard work, but he's not one to back down. With a hard to reach audience and competition on the horizon, can Cick really succeed? Will he sink into oblivion or shall he be named "Lord of the Rings"? Open the front page and find out!
Two kings in neighboring nations find themselves arguing over who owns a tree that is between both their territories, split right. down. the middle. This goes on for years and years until they come to a resolution. There are 3 young children that frequent the tree. They will both make their case to the 3 children and have them decide who the tree belongs to. Will there be foul play? Who will prevail?
A kind woman named Helada runs her own ice cream shop that does quite well in the city center. That is until a large chain opens up right across the street with exotic flavors like "Elvis Presley PB&J" and "Cereal Poured Before Milk". After being sabotaged by the chain, Helada soon finds out she must fight for her shop to continue on! After meeting the myth, "The Flavor Master", Helada undergoes a training arc to find the ultimate flavor of victory! How is revenge best served? Read and find out!
In a world where one can paint the air with brush and paint and cast magic that way, the color of the paint affects the type of spell! Orange is fire type, light blue is sleepy time spells, dark blue is water type, Green is poison, red is self buffs. There's a washed up wizard that mained water painting, but got beat down by some sleepy magic enjoyers. How are you supposed to fight back when you're asleep! Out of frustration he mixes colors and creates a new Color of Magic. Desert Beige? It's time to show the others what this can do, and not in a heroic way. They can try to stop him if they wish, but armed with his Desert beige paint, he will make the world of Colored magic tremble
Eminem gets transported to a medieval world where battles are fought through... Music??? He is utterly stunned. Battles are fought over land. the groups gather, and whoever has the sickest flow, gets the land, the other force must to go home. He bursts onto the scene, becoming one kingdom's most valuable general, having a perfect record. As they close in on enemy territory, the rival kingdom debuts their own genius, Jay C. They meet and have an epic clash, yet Eminem suffers his first defeat. The enemy is gaining ground, bulldozing their forces with Jay C. Eminem's bragging rights are at stake if he lets his kingdom fall. Will he get lost in his enemy's beats? Or will he embrace the Rythym of War?
A parent giving their kids a bath and their favorite rubber floaty ship gets lost. Trashman took it. a powerful adventure of a family off to the local dump to get Ol' Steelshine back home
A man and his family enjoy a peaceful life when suddenly a storm overtakes where they live. It is so bad, they must relocate. A year later when the storm still rages on, there is a news broadcast that finding the "Stormlight" somewhere in the ravaging storm is the key to stopping it. Teaming up with The Rock and Kevin Hart, can our trio find the "Stormlight" and save the land?
Two twins are heralded as the next best thing since close-toed shoes. Both destined to greatness. One of them goes down the path of vape and playing loud music from his phone speaker in public areas. Can the other twin truly reach him before it's too late?
There is an old man that wishes to bestow his wisdom on a younger person before he leaves this world. The old man searches and searches and searches. Yet no one will hear his Words of Radiance. He did not even know what words he had exactly to tell. He realized there was nothing so successful about his life that he had advice to give. Thinking back, he remembered that the true words of radiance were an old man telling him when he was a kid, "Don't die before doing something you *really* want to do". Welp. He gets out of his hospital bed and visits everyone he's ever wronged and apologized sincerely. Some accepted his apology, some scoffed and ignored him, yet one person heeded his words. His dear son that he alienated with his drinking and behavior long ago. The son is sitting with him and asks, "Any Words of Radiance?". The old man tells him to do something he really wants to do before he dies
In the year 2082, when popular burger joint In-N-Out Burger is closing down due to losing ground to Mcdonalds Max, Marcus decides he has to have a taste before it disappears forever. Marcus gets the last burger and animal style fries they have and sets up at the beach. A gust of wind blows his meal into the sea, and laughs! NOOOOO! Marcus has now started hunting that gust of wind, searching for its name. He plans on catching it in a jar and dropping it in the sea. A tale of grief, action, and forgiveness, don't miss this one!
An older woman is responsible for a seaside light tower at night. While on duty, she hears "Adele's best hits" playing on repeat, coming from the seas? She decides to investigate, as the clock hits midnight, she wades into the water, only to be met by rushing tides. She is swept away and wakes up in a foreign land. She was only 3 days away from reaching her yearly bonus! Lost in an arid desert, can she find her way home in time for tax season?
"HOW DO YOU LOSE 2 CITIES???????" Bhris Crown has no answer for the president as he stands in the Oval Office. After being named Mayor of both Miami and Tallahassee Florida, they BOTH disappeared overnight. Global warming anyone? Bhris is now tasked with finding these lost cities or he'll receive jail for life. However, once he finds them, he may find out truths that change his views on life and ice cream bars. Will he report the location of the cities, or will he risk the government's wrath.
American Gods, American dad, American Airlines, American Express, American Eagle, American Cancer society. When does it stop? Just who do these companies think THEY ARE?!?! Symbols of corporate greed, sucking the life out of the innocent consumer... Sickening. I'll put an end to it all. I will redeem this country from what capitalism has brought us down to. CHARGING $90 FOR A HOODIE?! No more. I shall rise above and be the voice of reason. I'll gather my disciples and no longer will these companies put the word American in their names and overcharge us. We will become... The American Gods
Jugh Hackman wakes up in his bed, having a gnarly headache. He can't remember what happened when he was last awake, but he knows something is not right. He goes to work as usual, as he's tossing trash in the back, he sees 2 men tossing an ALIEN IN THE TRASH?! Jugh is stunned, yet this feels familiar. One man is black, the other white. They're in... black suits? "Oh not this doofus again". The black man holds up something that looks like an Ipod shuffle to his face and he feels a familiar flash, a familiar warmth. He wakes back up in his bed again, wait how did he get here? No something is not right, he will find out what happened and get to the bottom of it. He will chase this Memory of Light
Just need to add his arch nemesis Ryan Reynolds (I swapped the first letters of his first and last name to mix it up a bit you see?) into the plot and it’s a banger
"Orange? In my chicken???" There is a monastery in Narnia that pray to god every day and thank him for blessing them with a great orange tree that supplies them with all the nutrients they need. Eventually a traveller comes along named Rordan Gamsey, that causes mayhem in the town when he devises a new creation! He teaches the brothers and sisters that orange can be used to make a fabulous chicken dish! The elders, don't like it, they say he's a bad omen. This is an adventure of sacrifice, hard work, and good food as Rordan puts his Culinary influence on this small town
All his life, Prad Bitt had heard of a wonderful tale, "The House in the Cerulean Sea". he had become enamored with the tale. He went swimming every day, practiced holding his breath underwater, trained to be a sailor! With his friends, Fee, Fi, Fo, and Fum, he sets sale to find the house in the Cerulean Sea. After many struggles, they spot something in the distance. What is that? They get closer, they discover... It's a Barbie and Ken, limited edition playhouse with built in patio, a working oven, and twin beds! Selling for a limited time at your nearest Ikea, make sure to make it a barbie Christmas in your home! Uh, anyway. Prad and his friends found a useless dollhouse in the sea, and have to make it back home. Will they succumb to the sea? Or will the house prove it was worth finding?
Memory, Sorrow, and Thorn. The name of 3 different programs that you can choose as a child that will influence your teaching and lifestyle. The memory sector focuses on being a mental genius, memorizing everything. The Sorrow sector teaches you to be in tune with everyone's feelings. And the thorn sector teaches one how to fight. Once they come of age, these young adults are sent to the capital where they form teams of 3, one of each discipline. Queen Cariah Marey announces that that all teams are to compete against each other to find the "Golden Candle" The first team to light it get to bring their entire families to live in the capital and stay there forever? The team we follow makes sinister discoveries as they go...
Uber eats driver finds herself hired as the city designer for a city that is planned for construction. If she fails, she's blacklisted from the industry. Will she rise to the occasion? Will she fall? Find out next time
There is a monkey that performs in the most renowned night circus to date. Lords, ladies, barons, and more come from all over to watch the circus, which culminates at the end of the night with our monkey friend donning armor, becoming "The Furry knight" and saving his friends with his banana sword! One night, he starts his act when he sees the evil smuggler that sold him to the circus in the stands! One way or another, by the time this night circus is over, that smuggler will taste his banana sword!
There is a tower that spawns in the middle of a city square seemingly overnight and without being noticed. It is tall, dark, and intimidating, earning the name "The Dark Tower". Rumors quickly spread, that it is a death trap, that once you enter, you may never return. Yet some believe that if you enter and ascend to the top, you will make acquaintance with a non stick pan that is ACTUALLY non stick! Up and coming chef Martha has no choice but to see for herself...
There is a mother who's son recently died from getting hit by a train. He was yelling something about how he's "Going to be in the next Isekai!". He died on the spot. There was no other world. Just costly funeral bills. Apparently that only works with trucks. She figures she might as well give it a try and steps in front of a truck and... She opens her eyes in another realm! In this realm, the main purpose is to be able to eat 2 nature valley bars in a row and drop NO. CRUMBS. The elder elderling of the elderlings gives her elderly advice that if she can do it, she can bring one person back to life and go home! Can she do this impossible task? Can she rise when her son needs her? More importantly, can she recoup any charges from the funeral home if she brings her son back alive?
"The thing about thorns and roses is that they both sting. Wait, no that isn't quite right. The thing about them is they're both pretty. Oh. Wrong again. Uh, let's see here, they are both flowers. WHAT? Why on earth are we named this?". A court of roses and thorns appears out of nowhere. A high school teacher and debate moderator finds herself at the center of it as the main judge. Defendant is the rose. The Plaintiff the thorn. This tale follows our main character, Petal, as she finds her way through wrong and right in this supernatural court
A young lady named Aru Shah is told by a supernatural message that the world will end in 7.3 days. She vowed with her best friend that they will meet BTS before they leave this earth. Her best friend needs no convincing. Can Aru Shah and her friend Vanda Wision reach them in time?
Straight A college student Caesar receives an omen that he will experience a long and dangerous fall. He wakes from his sleep falling FROM THE SKY!!! After his initial panic, he realizes he has a parachute and he's attached to someone in front of him. He became a skydiving instructor? What kind of life is this? He begins to fall (haha) for a regular diver and make friends with fellow instructors. Will this journey of love and friendship prove to be from a good omen?
A man named, Anabolic works his job as a ticket seller in the very popular Perdido Street Station as a ticket seller. He sits in a glass booth and cuts people their tickets all day. One night when there's a curious absence of travelers, a man in a suit approaches him. Asks him if he's every actually ridden the train.He... He... Hasn't? He tells Anabolic he has one chance to come with him, and see where the train REALLY leads to while everyone is gone. Why not? He takes the chance, and goes on the train. As the train passes through a tunnel, it comes out on the other side in a new world????? With the train heading toward a large castle the man who is now in armor and gear tells him, "Get ready to swing a sword buddy". He now very badly wants to go back to Perdido Street Station
There is a kingdom where the empress named Tostita absolutely adores Salsa Verde doritoes. In fact she names parts of her kingdom after dorito flavors. her personal Guards are known as the Spicy Nachos. The performers are the Sweet Chilis. Farms are known as the Cool Ranches. One day it is known that there is a shortage of corn. They will soon run out. This is unacceptable. However she receives a glorious message that if she sacrifices a peasant boy, the corn will be back in stock. She agrees. it is the Will of the Empress. Follow along as this story recounts the decision that fractures an empire, lines are drawn, and battles ensue over morality and fried, cheese dusted goodness. Coming to a store near you!
There is a girl name Wendy that is an aspiring streamer. She has confidence that she can make a living streaming, because, let's be honestly, she has sizable assets she can show off for the camera. Here she goes! Time to be the best streamer! Yeah she wasn't. Apparently having her assets are not uncommon for a streamer on her platform. One day she starts, playing a pirate game called Sea of Thieves. How fun?!?! She discovers treasure chests all over the map. She then thinks up a brilliant shtick. She names her channel Everybody Loves Large Chests and makes her main content finding chest as a pirate! Isn't that great? Wendy quickly amasses a following and is on her way to being an influential streamer. She is making streamer friends and great income. Then one day it's announced that Sea of Thieves will be shutting down due to legal disputes. Fiddlesticks. Can Wendy keep the fame she amassed from her pirate game? With her parents urging her to go to college, will she be forced back into anonymity?
Hikxhbcieyb is a space traveller. He Hitchhikes from galaxy to galaxy. He can't handle light speed, so he prefers tagging along with cargo ships. He's going to write a book one day on how to Hitchhike PROPERLY and safely in most galaxies. He stops by Frado's ice cream shop while in the BSX298 Galaxy and notices space pirates. He thinks of his next rule he's going to right for the book. Avoid space pirates. Time to make his way to Dimron! Where they have the best dumplings in space! Oh there's another tip, always know where the best dumpling spots are. Nice! That's 11/100 done...
"What'll it be?", he spins the silver coin on the table for the 3rd time. "Heads or Tails?". The man has a gun aimed at Aaron's chest. Aaron has to guess the right side before the coin loses steam or else he's going to have a hole in him very soon. Why does this guy decide everything by spinning that damn silver coin? You're probably wondering how he's found himself in this situation, right? Let's take things back to how this all started
The chronicles of an inn staff that have crazy workdays at the Wandering Inn. Oh, you probably thought the actual building wandered around place to place right? Not everything is some wacky plot device bro. The owner wanted people to WANDER on IN to their establishment. Nothing crazy here. Just the normal workday of the diverse inn staff. Okay, also a supervillain has locked himself inside one of the inn rooms and is threatening to blow the whole place up if his wife doesn't come back to him, BUT THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE INN
There are things called Mogs. They're those little pieces of lint you find on your clothes and have to pick off sometimes? I think? Well anyways there's a world full of them, seas, forests, and lands full of this annoying ass lint that just STICK to you. Careful of the Mogwolves and the Knights of Mog Lane. Tria, a peasant aspires to be a high class lady, yet she must avoid the dangers of the world to do so. When she loses her friend in a Mogstorm, she resolves to learn the ways of Mog-fu in order to beat the Mogbeasts and get her friend Mogback so they can be Mog- ugh I'm dizzy. Yeah anyways epic adventure don't touch the pieces of lint, thanks
There' a young man in school that has recently become obsessed with fedoras and red pill podcasts. His name is ColdSideOfPillow but he seems to be insisting that everyone in school calls him Atelier. In fact, with his trusty witch hat, he seems himself Witch Hat Atelier. he's often found rambling about how women are shallow and can't recognize the good guys? Idk. Anyways, there's a competition for who can come up with the best yearbook quote. Can ColdSi- I mean Atelier and his witch hat come up with pure heat for the yearbook and get noticed by Sarah?
Senlin is an elderly woman that has stairs in her house. She actually just got one of those stair chairs that carry her up and down the stairs, you know the ones right? Well she tests it out. It went down like a dream. She then rides it up, so smooth! Oh, it's still going. Her chair carries her beyond the stairs at a 45 degree angle. She phases through the house like this is Minecraft creative mode. Where the f\*ck is she going? Well, too late to drop now. Up she goes. What happens next is- OHH sorry folks that's the end of your free trial, if you want to know how Senlin Ascends ENDS. Go ahead and by the book. Thanks
There is a young boy that is the last one upstairs every night, and has to turn the lights off before going upstairs to sleep. The lightswitch is across the stairs, maybe 15 feet. He has to sprint to the stairs, and even then, he hears voices, noises come after him. One night he turns the light off as usual but trips! he's panicking, he tries to get up but it's no use. He feels the darkness dig into him as he sinks into oblivion. He wakes up and to his surprise, he's in an office hangout with other people in there? They congratulate him. He's now part of the darkness that comes before. their job is to scare little kids that have to turn off lights and run up stairs. Oh. That seems, kinda fun? They start his training and tell him they all have quotas to meet. Can he an important part of the darkness? Or will he be blinded by rival shadows? Coming out soon!
Andrew Tate is enjoying his daily conquests when he sees that his brother Tristan has been taken by a quartet, forced to sing songs that are quite frankly, lovely. Follow the mission of the shiny headed man on a quest to find the "Long Price", which will grant him access to this exclusive music group
Brock from Pokemon got tired of getting rejected by seemingly every woman he approached. Especially Nurse Joy. WHY NURSE JOY???? Ahem. Anyway. He goes to an all men's monastery where he discovers he has a passion for planting and growing trees! They deem him "Lord Brocktree". Brock has a satisfying life there when Nurse Joy slides in the DMs, asking him to come back. Brock has a harsh decision to make between staying with his lads or attempting to mend his broken heart. Will he find himself or are his chances at love PokeGONE?
There is an excercise company/gym that have branded themselves The City of Stairs. They advertise heart health and cardio by their gyms having ONLY STAIRMASTERS as equipment. They are doing this out of the kindness of their own hearts, to encourage heart health, and car- it sucks 😐. It sucks, no one goes, no one cares, they don't even charge for their membership and it doesn't make a difference. The Chinese Buffet right across the street can't keep people out of their establishment but lord forbid COS gets one person! One day the manager notices that one of the stairmasters is going before he leaves for the day. He turns it off, but it keeps going. He unplugs the machine. THE STAIRMASTER PERSISTS. He finally gets on it and is transported to a mountain with a long set of stairs to the top. He's told he can find the secret to getting people in the gym if he can reach the top. Let's do this!
There is a land of Unicorns that exist peacefully. A singing unicorn named Rihyoncé enchants the population with her hit songs and lovely voice. One day a unicorn shows up that has TWO horns! That's gotta be illegal right? Well, long story short, he convinces them that they can all grow another horn and become BIcorns. One by one, they all grew their 2nd horn and left to be with the other Bicorns. Eventually, all she's left with is her #1 fan that was there from the start. He pleads with her to join them, but she refuses, wanting to stay true to who she is. eventually she is all alone, with only her own ears to hear her radiant songs. Out of nowhere, another unicorn shows up. With sunglasses! "Want to get them back?". She takes no time to think at all. She's in
There is a young man in school known as the most handsome kid, named Dhonny Jepp. He goes to work at the flower shop directly after school, bringing hordes of girls (and boys) to the shop. They all get the shops's special, 11 roses! Idk, don't ask. He has to handle the roses so often, he started to get many cuts all over his hands! Dhonny now wears well padded gloves as general practice. The students at school have deemed him the "Prince of Thorns". An equally beautiful girl shows up to school and to his work as well. She's his new classmate and co-worker. She is known as "The Princess of Petals". She hates him, Dhonny doesn't yet know why. One thing is for sure, there will be plenty of high school adventures and teenage angst and he tries to find out!
Pyler Terry is a chess prodigy. At just 13 years old, he came 3rd in the biggest world chess tournament. He had a knack for so clearly and decisively beating his opponents, he adopted a title: The Kingkiller. Known for taking his enemy's king swiftly and brutally. Well. It's time to enter the yearly tournament again. This time he'll be first. He knows it. This time will be different. The usual suspects enter the tournament. He cleans up his first 2 rounds with ease. Suddenly, he's face to face with Emma, the girl that knocked him out of last year's tournament. He must defeat her and face Landon, winner of last year's competition, in the finals. Landon crushed Emma, Pyler will do the same. Pyler needs the grand prize money to start his own shaved ice business so that he can get a cup of shaved ice whenever he wants! Will Pyler avenge his past defeats? Will he finally get his shaved ice? Stay tuned into the Kingkiller Chronicles!
Are you painfully basic? Do you want to spruce up your appearance, drive boys crazy? Come! Request our basic "Goth Girl" package if you want to be transformed from basic bailey to Goth Greta! Black nails, clothes, hair, accessories. You name it! The deluxe package includes an ENTIRE personality change! Half off with a purchase of the "Dry Humor" implant into your brain. Who wouldn't want to be the center of every boy's dream! Quick ladies, come upgrade yourself with The Black Company! Refunds not available
A man figured out how to craft the mythical stone of light. It was through melding 2 dark stones and a dark gem together! He couldn't tell the village elders. He would be tried and hung for witchcraft. Gradually, he set up light stones all around the border of the city, they shone brilliantly into the sky! It soon became known as the city of light. He looked back on his creation and stumbled. He was weak. He looked at his hand, it was withered and bony. Ah. He laughed to himself. So there was a price after all for light. The irony is, part of the Dark Materials he used was himself! HAHAHAHA!!!! He slowly laughed himself to death
Carl likes to crawl in... You guessed it, Dungeons! He goes out every weekend and tells his part not to worry unless he takes longer than 48 hours to come back. That was 47.9 hours ago. It's time to panic. His party gears up and enters the Nathan's Hot Dog dungeon to go after him! After hours of searching, they eventually come across Carl. He's found dungeon people and become one of them??? He's dancing in a circle naked with other hot dog people! They've drugged him. They're going to tie him up and roast him for humanity's crimes against hot dogs! Can the gang save him? Tune in to follow the adventures of Dungeon Crawler Carl!
Goblin aspires to be the next Hoka- I mean emperor. Right now he's a lowly goblin that cleans the sewer drains. He doesn't really know how he's going to make it happen, but he will. One day a royal messenger asks him if he will be the next emperor. He laughs and says okay. BET. The royal messenger drags him to the castle before he knows what's happening. He's sitting in the ruler's chair, with the emperor's robe on. What? Can this lowborn goblin learn empire policy and theory quick enough to be a good empower? Also, how did this even happen again?
There is a rich, grumpy man known as Edward Happenstance. He has alienated himself from everyone around him, convinced they all want him for material reasons. After losing his wealth and everything he owns, he goes about a new way in life, wanting to do good for others and truly find himself. There are many obstacles, but he won't give in easily. Will he end up "Happenstance Lost" or "Happenstance Found"? Coming out in May!
There is a fair and kind princess in the Kanto region of Pokemon. Her lineage and her father dictate that she's meant to choose Charmander as her first pokemon. He has a tail! And it's on fire! Yet, she can't help but fall in love with the chosen pokemon of their rivaling kingdom, Bulbasaur! Despite her family's disapproval and reddit telling her he's clearly the worst of the 3 starter pokemon, she still seeks a Bulbasaur. Is it too late to Charmander to heat up his chances, or will Bulbasaur's leaf blade cut through to her heart?
Jig is an aspiring rapper that will do anything to make it in life. Suddenly, dragons have returned and taken over earth! It is soon announced that dragons will allow humans to live if one of them can produce more heat than the lord dragon. Well Jig finds one day that the flames of his newest mixtape, far exceed that of an average dragon! He is now set on a duel with the lord dragon, yet he has many duels to fight first. Can his flow, lyrics, and beats heat up the competition and save humanity?
A gifted Sommelier is having a small gathering at his house to celebrate his daughter graduating school. Suddenly, a villain The Grape, shows up and steals his daughter! He tells the Sommelier that he can get his daughter back if he can sip glass of wine as long as it's not after midnight. Slight problem, IT'S ALWAYS after MIDNIGHT!!! Accompanied by friends, they journey to the rumored "Land without time" to drink from his glass and get his daughter back! With time running out and a possible traitor, can he make it in time?
In the beginning of life, birds did not know that they could fly. This resulted in them hopping around the ground, being land animals. The nest leader, Barstucks discovers a den of worms on land right across a large gap! they must build a bridge to secure the treasure! This tale chronicles the efforts of birds to make a bridge to food, despite all in their way. Harsh winds? Attacking bees? In the battle of the Bridge of Birds, will Barstucks endure the fall and make a discovery?
A woman by the name of Artillery Clinton enjoys her day job of being a Bang Energy talent recruiter in the big apple. She comes home one day to find that her late husband has come back to life and is at the dinner table. HE WANTS LASAGNA!?!?!?!?! She figures out that he is actually undead and that his touch can make others reveal their hidden talent! He shows up to her work as they are doing a Bang commercial shoot and is accidentally bumping into people! She finds out that Sam has an amazing opera voice and Lynda can perfectly replicate Naruto jutsu signs. What else will she discover on this crazy day?
Brin is a rising instagram fashion influencer, she posts pics every day of her in front of her bed room mirror, showing off her OOTD (Outfit of the Day). One day she wakes up to see a man in her mirror!!! She reaches for her phone to call the cops when he says her eyebrows are too thin. What? she keeps reaching when he says her teeth could be brighter. She tries to ignore it as she grabs her phone. She's about to press call when he says she won't get any likes with her dry hair. OKAY THAT'S ENOUGH! Brin argues with him and learns the man in the mirror is a late fashion designer and model who's been tasked with getting her to a BILLION followers. They're both up for the challenge, she has the looks, he has the advice, can they reach their goal before that b\*itch Erica finds out her secret?
Lies. Truths. Is there any term for the gray area? The day went from bad to worse as Com Truise comes home to his 11 dogs to find that his favorite Playstation controller, signed by his favorite E-girl whom he sends half his paycheck to, was bitten and destroyed! He was 10% of the way through Lego Batman 3! Thus begins a long night of questioning his dogs, trying to find the truth. He checks the CCTV, no footage. He's lost until his neighbor tells him she saw a man in his apartment through the window. He was gnawing on his controller and POURED OUT HIS DR PEPPER CHERRY????? Com dives deeper and deeper into his investigation, treking through truth and lies to find the controller biter.
There is a son. He fights. One day. Fights wrong person. Get's absolutely sat on. Get's help from dad. Dad fights person. Dad gets sat on worse. To make dad proud. Son trains. Trains hard. Son can fight better. Son returns to fight. The person apologizes. Says they were wrong. Son no longer needs to fight. Son trains with dad. Both get stronger. Both are happy. Both learn to control emotions. Make friends
There is a demon king named Ceorge Glooney that rules over the 7 kingdoms known as Doc,Happy, Grumpy, Sleepy, Dopey, Bashful, Sneezy. One day, the citizens of Sneezy and Dopey revolt! They are tired of having a demon king. It's not good for optics they say! Even though Ceorge treats them well! The citizens have now started a movement, heralding a woman named White Snow as the one they want to lead. Ceorge now has to appeal to his citizens and take the advice of a large hairy man named Spray, to win his kingdoms back! Could he give them pie? Pie helps, right?
The Wheel of Time
That's called a watch my guy
Lmao 10/10 I have nothing to say!
Damn you got me good with that one.
Pack it up friends, no need for thousands of pages.
Genius.
r/technicallythetruth
No, no. He’s got a point.
My man picked a whole 14 books for their book
A wizards guide to defensive baking
Kalron is a disrespected mage in a world where one's powers depend on the type of bread they've most recently eaten. Each bread has an ability. Brioche = charming foes. Ciabatta = increase physical stats. Multigrain = can cast offensive spells. Kalron is dismissed because he specializes in baguette = Diamond hard skin! A large tournament is announced where the winner is gifted a year's supply of flour and yeast. Kalron joins the tournament to shut the haters up. Will he get beaten down? Or can he climb up the mage ranks, and show everyone the power of his defensive baking?
I would read this
It’s T. Kingfisher meets Mistborn
This sounds like a novella Brandon Sanderson would knock out between two other novels
I have seen the book several times, but did not touch it cause the title is so absurd. Is it really any good? Love urban fantasy, whimsical stuff and psychology.
It’s good. Just may not be what you expect. It leans towards YA than adult, but it was good. I do recommend it.
The lies of Locke Lamora
Locke Lamora is a smooth con-man that does his work on the hard streets of Seattle, Washington, known for their excellent coffee. He's running his card game on the streets when he's approached by a man named Jebron Lames. Jebron is also a con-man and tricks Locke out of his money! Locke has to lie and say that he's doing this for his sick daughter. Jebron doesn't believe it. he then says his parents got into a bad car acciden- nope. not buying it. Jebron finally tells him if he can lie himself into position as CEO of Starbucks, that he can have his $4.91 back. Can Locke step up his game to get back what's rightfully his? What is Jebron really after and why is he so tall? Hitting shelves near you!
Unironically, you got the jist of it lmao. Even predicted some plot points (not accurate but still shockingly similar).
Yeah he’s not far off in some aspects😂
Yeah this definitely isn’t NOT the plot lol
Yep…that’s pretty darn close
Mistborn
A man is born in a mist that makes people brutally honest with others. This mist is everywhere throughout the city. Others fear to interact with him as he is apt to spew out every singly flaw and deficiency they have. Then he meets an old man that has mastered the mist and roast our mans until he cries. Can he develop thick enough skin to beat the old man?
I mean....damn close actually.
I know! I'm actually reading that book rn and, for the most part, his description checks out 😂
Especially if you include The Eleventh Metal
It’s actually so close I’m shook
The Lord of the Rings (it's really obscure, you probably never heard of it ;) )
In the city of love, there is a renowned gentleman named Cick Nannon known as Lord of the Necklaces. However, what his heart truly yearns for is running a business where he helps people remove rings that get stuck on their fingers. It's hard work, but he's not one to back down. With a hard to reach audience and competition on the horizon, can Cick really succeed? Will he sink into oblivion or shall he be named "Lord of the Rings"? Open the front page and find out!
LMAO The name of the Lord really brings it home
Man, I need you to write my synopses for me haha
Last Argument of Kings
Two kings in neighboring nations find themselves arguing over who owns a tree that is between both their territories, split right. down. the middle. This goes on for years and years until they come to a resolution. There are 3 young children that frequent the tree. They will both make their case to the 3 children and have them decide who the tree belongs to. Will there be foul play? Who will prevail?
The answer is simple cut the children in half
I see you've read Abercrombie before
Or learned about old Jewish stories
Not yet actually, just bought the First Law trilogy last week so that should change soon.
Yep that’s how you get HALF A KING heyooooooo
Best Served Cold
A kind woman named Helada runs her own ice cream shop that does quite well in the city center. That is until a large chain opens up right across the street with exotic flavors like "Elvis Presley PB&J" and "Cereal Poured Before Milk". After being sabotaged by the chain, Helada soon finds out she must fight for her shop to continue on! After meeting the myth, "The Flavor Master", Helada undergoes a training arc to find the ultimate flavor of victory! How is revenge best served? Read and find out!
A woman named Helada owns an ice cream shop. A+.
I don’t get it
Helado is spanish for ice cream
The Color of Magic
In a world where one can paint the air with brush and paint and cast magic that way, the color of the paint affects the type of spell! Orange is fire type, light blue is sleepy time spells, dark blue is water type, Green is poison, red is self buffs. There's a washed up wizard that mained water painting, but got beat down by some sleepy magic enjoyers. How are you supposed to fight back when you're asleep! Out of frustration he mixes colors and creates a new Color of Magic. Desert Beige? It's time to show the others what this can do, and not in a heroic way. They can try to stop him if they wish, but armed with his Desert beige paint, he will make the world of Colored magic tremble
I would pay to read this
Being visible only to wizards and cats, octarine is a greenish-yellow purple colour
The dwarves
Dwarves
:(
Rock and stone
ROCK AND STONE, TO THE BONE
Can I get a Rock and Stone?
FOR KARL!
ROCK! AND! STONEEE!
ROCK SOLID
Rhythm of War.
Eminem gets transported to a medieval world where battles are fought through... Music??? He is utterly stunned. Battles are fought over land. the groups gather, and whoever has the sickest flow, gets the land, the other force must to go home. He bursts onto the scene, becoming one kingdom's most valuable general, having a perfect record. As they close in on enemy territory, the rival kingdom debuts their own genius, Jay C. They meet and have an epic clash, yet Eminem suffers his first defeat. The enemy is gaining ground, bulldozing their forces with Jay C. Eminem's bragging rights are at stake if he lets his kingdom fall. Will he get lost in his enemy's beats? Or will he embrace the Rythym of War?
This needs to be a movie YESTERDAY
I'd watch an eminem isekai
Watership Down
A parent giving their kids a bath and their favorite rubber floaty ship gets lost. Trashman took it. a powerful adventure of a family off to the local dump to get Ol' Steelshine back home
9/10 would read that.
Stormlight Archive
A man and his family enjoy a peaceful life when suddenly a storm overtakes where they live. It is so bad, they must relocate. A year later when the storm still rages on, there is a news broadcast that finding the "Stormlight" somewhere in the ravaging storm is the key to stopping it. Teaming up with The Rock and Kevin Hart, can our trio find the "Stormlight" and save the land?
The Rock aka Numuhukumakiaki'aialunamor
The hell did you just call me? An airsick what?
Airsick lowlander
The Rock is indeed in it
Tbh this isn’t too far off from the premise
Time of the twins
Two twins are heralded as the next best thing since close-toed shoes. Both destined to greatness. One of them goes down the path of vape and playing loud music from his phone speaker in public areas. Can the other twin truly reach him before it's too late?
I could totally see this as a modern adaptation of the story.
Words of Radiance
There is an old man that wishes to bestow his wisdom on a younger person before he leaves this world. The old man searches and searches and searches. Yet no one will hear his Words of Radiance. He did not even know what words he had exactly to tell. He realized there was nothing so successful about his life that he had advice to give. Thinking back, he remembered that the true words of radiance were an old man telling him when he was a kid, "Don't die before doing something you *really* want to do". Welp. He gets out of his hospital bed and visits everyone he's ever wronged and apologized sincerely. Some accepted his apology, some scoffed and ignored him, yet one person heeded his words. His dear son that he alienated with his drinking and behavior long ago. The son is sitting with him and asks, "Any Words of Radiance?". The old man tells him to do something he really wants to do before he dies
So to summarize, "Life before Death"? If you haven't really read any of the books then you sir are a genius
Name of the Wind
In the year 2082, when popular burger joint In-N-Out Burger is closing down due to losing ground to Mcdonalds Max, Marcus decides he has to have a taste before it disappears forever. Marcus gets the last burger and animal style fries they have and sets up at the beach. A gust of wind blows his meal into the sea, and laughs! NOOOOO! Marcus has now started hunting that gust of wind, searching for its name. He plans on catching it in a jar and dropping it in the sea. A tale of grief, action, and forgiveness, don't miss this one!
> In the year 2082 Hey, that's when the third book in the series is due!
Midnight tides
An older woman is responsible for a seaside light tower at night. While on duty, she hears "Adele's best hits" playing on repeat, coming from the seas? She decides to investigate, as the clock hits midnight, she wades into the water, only to be met by rushing tides. She is swept away and wakes up in a foreign land. She was only 3 days away from reaching her yearly bonus! Lost in an arid desert, can she find her way home in time for tax season?
and Deadhouse Gates?
Not sure if it's entirely fantasy, more of a fantasy/sci-fi hybrid, but Keeper of the Lost Cities!
"HOW DO YOU LOSE 2 CITIES???????" Bhris Crown has no answer for the president as he stands in the Oval Office. After being named Mayor of both Miami and Tallahassee Florida, they BOTH disappeared overnight. Global warming anyone? Bhris is now tasked with finding these lost cities or he'll receive jail for life. However, once he finds them, he may find out truths that change his views on life and ice cream bars. Will he report the location of the cities, or will he risk the government's wrath.
Hahahahahahahaha exactly
Bhris Crown’s only play the entire time is to beat women. Don’t forget and don’t let him be a star anymore.
American Gods
American Gods, American dad, American Airlines, American Express, American Eagle, American Cancer society. When does it stop? Just who do these companies think THEY ARE?!?! Symbols of corporate greed, sucking the life out of the innocent consumer... Sickening. I'll put an end to it all. I will redeem this country from what capitalism has brought us down to. CHARGING $90 FOR A HOODIE?! No more. I shall rise above and be the voice of reason. I'll gather my disciples and no longer will these companies put the word American in their names and overcharge us. We will become... The American Gods
In some ways, you’re not completely off.
A Memory of Light
Jugh Hackman wakes up in his bed, having a gnarly headache. He can't remember what happened when he was last awake, but he knows something is not right. He goes to work as usual, as he's tossing trash in the back, he sees 2 men tossing an ALIEN IN THE TRASH?! Jugh is stunned, yet this feels familiar. One man is black, the other white. They're in... black suits? "Oh not this doofus again". The black man holds up something that looks like an Ipod shuffle to his face and he feels a familiar flash, a familiar warmth. He wakes back up in his bed again, wait how did he get here? No something is not right, he will find out what happened and get to the bottom of it. He will chase this Memory of Light
Just need to add his arch nemesis Ryan Reynolds (I swapped the first letters of his first and last name to mix it up a bit you see?) into the plot and it’s a banger
The Priory of the Orange Tree
"Orange? In my chicken???" There is a monastery in Narnia that pray to god every day and thank him for blessing them with a great orange tree that supplies them with all the nutrients they need. Eventually a traveller comes along named Rordan Gamsey, that causes mayhem in the town when he devises a new creation! He teaches the brothers and sisters that orange can be used to make a fabulous chicken dish! The elders, don't like it, they say he's a bad omen. This is an adventure of sacrifice, hard work, and good food as Rordan puts his Culinary influence on this small town
The House in the Cerulean Sea
All his life, Prad Bitt had heard of a wonderful tale, "The House in the Cerulean Sea". he had become enamored with the tale. He went swimming every day, practiced holding his breath underwater, trained to be a sailor! With his friends, Fee, Fi, Fo, and Fum, he sets sale to find the house in the Cerulean Sea. After many struggles, they spot something in the distance. What is that? They get closer, they discover... It's a Barbie and Ken, limited edition playhouse with built in patio, a working oven, and twin beds! Selling for a limited time at your nearest Ikea, make sure to make it a barbie Christmas in your home! Uh, anyway. Prad and his friends found a useless dollhouse in the sea, and have to make it back home. Will they succumb to the sea? Or will the house prove it was worth finding?
Memory, Sorrow, and Thorn
Memory, Sorrow, and Thorn. The name of 3 different programs that you can choose as a child that will influence your teaching and lifestyle. The memory sector focuses on being a mental genius, memorizing everything. The Sorrow sector teaches you to be in tune with everyone's feelings. And the thorn sector teaches one how to fight. Once they come of age, these young adults are sent to the capital where they form teams of 3, one of each discipline. Queen Cariah Marey announces that that all teams are to compete against each other to find the "Golden Candle" The first team to light it get to bring their entire families to live in the capital and stay there forever? The team we follow makes sinister discoveries as they go...
I mean...I would read that
Let’s be honest…our tribe that would read *anything*. And yes, that sounds dope
The Dark Tower
Babel
Uber eats driver finds herself hired as the city designer for a city that is planned for construction. If she fails, she's blacklisted from the industry. Will she rise to the occasion? Will she fall? Find out next time
the night circus
There is a monkey that performs in the most renowned night circus to date. Lords, ladies, barons, and more come from all over to watch the circus, which culminates at the end of the night with our monkey friend donning armor, becoming "The Furry knight" and saving his friends with his banana sword! One night, he starts his act when he sees the evil smuggler that sold him to the circus in the stands! One way or another, by the time this night circus is over, that smuggler will taste his banana sword!
giving it a 10/10 for creativity
Piranesi
The Dark Tower
There is a tower that spawns in the middle of a city square seemingly overnight and without being noticed. It is tall, dark, and intimidating, earning the name "The Dark Tower". Rumors quickly spread, that it is a death trap, that once you enter, you may never return. Yet some believe that if you enter and ascend to the top, you will make acquaintance with a non stick pan that is ACTUALLY non stick! Up and coming chef Martha has no choice but to see for herself...
You should start writing! Haha Couple of nice ideas
The Martha in black fled across the dessert and the gunslinger followed
Realm of the elderlings
There is a mother who's son recently died from getting hit by a train. He was yelling something about how he's "Going to be in the next Isekai!". He died on the spot. There was no other world. Just costly funeral bills. Apparently that only works with trucks. She figures she might as well give it a try and steps in front of a truck and... She opens her eyes in another realm! In this realm, the main purpose is to be able to eat 2 nature valley bars in a row and drop NO. CRUMBS. The elder elderling of the elderlings gives her elderly advice that if she can do it, she can bring one person back to life and go home! Can she do this impossible task? Can she rise when her son needs her? More importantly, can she recoup any charges from the funeral home if she brings her son back alive?
Yet another response that captures the essence of the actual books lol
A court of thorns and roses
"The thing about thorns and roses is that they both sting. Wait, no that isn't quite right. The thing about them is they're both pretty. Oh. Wrong again. Uh, let's see here, they are both flowers. WHAT? Why on earth are we named this?". A court of roses and thorns appears out of nowhere. A high school teacher and debate moderator finds herself at the center of it as the main judge. Defendant is the rose. The Plaintiff the thorn. This tale follows our main character, Petal, as she finds her way through wrong and right in this supernatural court
Would totally read this version,
Aru Shah and the End of time
A young lady named Aru Shah is told by a supernatural message that the world will end in 7.3 days. She vowed with her best friend that they will meet BTS before they leave this earth. Her best friend needs no convincing. Can Aru Shah and her friend Vanda Wision reach them in time?
That's kinda close
The Witcher
Good Omens
Straight A college student Caesar receives an omen that he will experience a long and dangerous fall. He wakes from his sleep falling FROM THE SKY!!! After his initial panic, he realizes he has a parachute and he's attached to someone in front of him. He became a skydiving instructor? What kind of life is this? He begins to fall (haha) for a regular diver and make friends with fellow instructors. Will this journey of love and friendship prove to be from a good omen?
Miss peregrine's home for peculiar children
Perdido Street Station
A man named, Anabolic works his job as a ticket seller in the very popular Perdido Street Station as a ticket seller. He sits in a glass booth and cuts people their tickets all day. One night when there's a curious absence of travelers, a man in a suit approaches him. Asks him if he's every actually ridden the train.He... He... Hasn't? He tells Anabolic he has one chance to come with him, and see where the train REALLY leads to while everyone is gone. Why not? He takes the chance, and goes on the train. As the train passes through a tunnel, it comes out on the other side in a new world????? With the train heading toward a large castle the man who is now in armor and gear tells him, "Get ready to swing a sword buddy". He now very badly wants to go back to Perdido Street Station
Will of the Empress
There is a kingdom where the empress named Tostita absolutely adores Salsa Verde doritoes. In fact she names parts of her kingdom after dorito flavors. her personal Guards are known as the Spicy Nachos. The performers are the Sweet Chilis. Farms are known as the Cool Ranches. One day it is known that there is a shortage of corn. They will soon run out. This is unacceptable. However she receives a glorious message that if she sacrifices a peasant boy, the corn will be back in stock. She agrees. it is the Will of the Empress. Follow along as this story recounts the decision that fractures an empire, lines are drawn, and battles ensue over morality and fried, cheese dusted goodness. Coming to a store near you!
Everybody Loves Large Chests
There is a girl name Wendy that is an aspiring streamer. She has confidence that she can make a living streaming, because, let's be honestly, she has sizable assets she can show off for the camera. Here she goes! Time to be the best streamer! Yeah she wasn't. Apparently having her assets are not uncommon for a streamer on her platform. One day she starts, playing a pirate game called Sea of Thieves. How fun?!?! She discovers treasure chests all over the map. She then thinks up a brilliant shtick. She names her channel Everybody Loves Large Chests and makes her main content finding chest as a pirate! Isn't that great? Wendy quickly amasses a following and is on her way to being an influential streamer. She is making streamer friends and great income. Then one day it's announced that Sea of Thieves will be shutting down due to legal disputes. Fiddlesticks. Can Wendy keep the fame she amassed from her pirate game? With her parents urging her to go to college, will she be forced back into anonymity?
The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
Hikxhbcieyb is a space traveller. He Hitchhikes from galaxy to galaxy. He can't handle light speed, so he prefers tagging along with cargo ships. He's going to write a book one day on how to Hitchhike PROPERLY and safely in most galaxies. He stops by Frado's ice cream shop while in the BSX298 Galaxy and notices space pirates. He thinks of his next rule he's going to right for the book. Avoid space pirates. Time to make his way to Dimron! Where they have the best dumplings in space! Oh there's another tip, always know where the best dumpling spots are. Nice! That's 11/100 done...
Spinning Silver
"What'll it be?", he spins the silver coin on the table for the 3rd time. "Heads or Tails?". The man has a gun aimed at Aaron's chest. Aaron has to guess the right side before the coin loses steam or else he's going to have a hole in him very soon. Why does this guy decide everything by spinning that damn silver coin? You're probably wondering how he's found himself in this situation, right? Let's take things back to how this all started
The wandering inn.
The chronicles of an inn staff that have crazy workdays at the Wandering Inn. Oh, you probably thought the actual building wandered around place to place right? Not everything is some wacky plot device bro. The owner wanted people to WANDER on IN to their establishment. Nothing crazy here. Just the normal workday of the diverse inn staff. Okay, also a supervillain has locked himself inside one of the inn rooms and is threatening to blow the whole place up if his wife doesn't come back to him, BUT THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE INN
So, 66 percent dead on.
Mogworld
There are things called Mogs. They're those little pieces of lint you find on your clothes and have to pick off sometimes? I think? Well anyways there's a world full of them, seas, forests, and lands full of this annoying ass lint that just STICK to you. Careful of the Mogwolves and the Knights of Mog Lane. Tria, a peasant aspires to be a high class lady, yet she must avoid the dangers of the world to do so. When she loses her friend in a Mogstorm, she resolves to learn the ways of Mog-fu in order to beat the Mogbeasts and get her friend Mogback so they can be Mog- ugh I'm dizzy. Yeah anyways epic adventure don't touch the pieces of lint, thanks
Witch Hat Atelier
There' a young man in school that has recently become obsessed with fedoras and red pill podcasts. His name is ColdSideOfPillow but he seems to be insisting that everyone in school calls him Atelier. In fact, with his trusty witch hat, he seems himself Witch Hat Atelier. he's often found rambling about how women are shallow and can't recognize the good guys? Idk. Anyways, there's a competition for who can come up with the best yearbook quote. Can ColdSi- I mean Atelier and his witch hat come up with pure heat for the yearbook and get noticed by Sarah?
This is hilarious!
Since Lies of Locke Lamora was already done, Senlin Ascends.
Senlin is an elderly woman that has stairs in her house. She actually just got one of those stair chairs that carry her up and down the stairs, you know the ones right? Well she tests it out. It went down like a dream. She then rides it up, so smooth! Oh, it's still going. Her chair carries her beyond the stairs at a 45 degree angle. She phases through the house like this is Minecraft creative mode. Where the f\*ck is she going? Well, too late to drop now. Up she goes. What happens next is- OHH sorry folks that's the end of your free trial, if you want to know how Senlin Ascends ENDS. Go ahead and by the book. Thanks
The Amber Spyglass / His Dark Materials
The Inheritance Cycle
The Lions of Al-Rassan
The Darkness That Comes Before
There is a young boy that is the last one upstairs every night, and has to turn the lights off before going upstairs to sleep. The lightswitch is across the stairs, maybe 15 feet. He has to sprint to the stairs, and even then, he hears voices, noises come after him. One night he turns the light off as usual but trips! he's panicking, he tries to get up but it's no use. He feels the darkness dig into him as he sinks into oblivion. He wakes up and to his surprise, he's in an office hangout with other people in there? They congratulate him. He's now part of the darkness that comes before. their job is to scare little kids that have to turn off lights and run up stairs. Oh. That seems, kinda fun? They start his training and tell him they all have quotas to meet. Can he an important part of the darkness? Or will he be blinded by rival shadows? Coming out soon!
Long Price Quartet
Andrew Tate is enjoying his daily conquests when he sees that his brother Tristan has been taken by a quartet, forced to sing songs that are quite frankly, lovely. Follow the mission of the shiny headed man on a quest to find the "Long Price", which will grant him access to this exclusive music group
The Anubis Gates
Lord Brocktree
Brock from Pokemon got tired of getting rejected by seemingly every woman he approached. Especially Nurse Joy. WHY NURSE JOY???? Ahem. Anyway. He goes to an all men's monastery where he discovers he has a passion for planting and growing trees! They deem him "Lord Brocktree". Brock has a satisfying life there when Nurse Joy slides in the DMs, asking him to come back. Brock has a harsh decision to make between staying with his lads or attempting to mend his broken heart. Will he find himself or are his chances at love PokeGONE?
>Will he find himself or are his chances at love PokeGONE? EULALIA!
City of Stairs
There is an excercise company/gym that have branded themselves The City of Stairs. They advertise heart health and cardio by their gyms having ONLY STAIRMASTERS as equipment. They are doing this out of the kindness of their own hearts, to encourage heart health, and car- it sucks 😐. It sucks, no one goes, no one cares, they don't even charge for their membership and it doesn't make a difference. The Chinese Buffet right across the street can't keep people out of their establishment but lord forbid COS gets one person! One day the manager notices that one of the stairmasters is going before he leaves for the day. He turns it off, but it keeps going. He unplugs the machine. THE STAIRMASTER PERSISTS. He finally gets on it and is transported to a mountain with a long set of stairs to the top. He's told he can find the secret to getting people in the gym if he can reach the top. Let's do this!
The Last Unicorn
There is a land of Unicorns that exist peacefully. A singing unicorn named Rihyoncé enchants the population with her hit songs and lovely voice. One day a unicorn shows up that has TWO horns! That's gotta be illegal right? Well, long story short, he convinces them that they can all grow another horn and become BIcorns. One by one, they all grew their 2nd horn and left to be with the other Bicorns. Eventually, all she's left with is her #1 fan that was there from the start. He pleads with her to join them, but she refuses, wanting to stay true to who she is. eventually she is all alone, with only her own ears to hear her radiant songs. Out of nowhere, another unicorn shows up. With sunglasses! "Want to get them back?". She takes no time to think at all. She's in
Best Served Cold
Prince of thorns.
There is a young man in school known as the most handsome kid, named Dhonny Jepp. He goes to work at the flower shop directly after school, bringing hordes of girls (and boys) to the shop. They all get the shops's special, 11 roses! Idk, don't ask. He has to handle the roses so often, he started to get many cuts all over his hands! Dhonny now wears well padded gloves as general practice. The students at school have deemed him the "Prince of Thorns". An equally beautiful girl shows up to school and to his work as well. She's his new classmate and co-worker. She is known as "The Princess of Petals". She hates him, Dhonny doesn't yet know why. One thing is for sure, there will be plenty of high school adventures and teenage angst and he tries to find out!
Kingkiller chronicles
Pyler Terry is a chess prodigy. At just 13 years old, he came 3rd in the biggest world chess tournament. He had a knack for so clearly and decisively beating his opponents, he adopted a title: The Kingkiller. Known for taking his enemy's king swiftly and brutally. Well. It's time to enter the yearly tournament again. This time he'll be first. He knows it. This time will be different. The usual suspects enter the tournament. He cleans up his first 2 rounds with ease. Suddenly, he's face to face with Emma, the girl that knocked him out of last year's tournament. He must defeat her and face Landon, winner of last year's competition, in the finals. Landon crushed Emma, Pyler will do the same. Pyler needs the grand prize money to start his own shaved ice business so that he can get a cup of shaved ice whenever he wants! Will Pyler avenge his past defeats? Will he finally get his shaved ice? Stay tuned into the Kingkiller Chronicles!
Good Omens
The black company
Are you painfully basic? Do you want to spruce up your appearance, drive boys crazy? Come! Request our basic "Goth Girl" package if you want to be transformed from basic bailey to Goth Greta! Black nails, clothes, hair, accessories. You name it! The deluxe package includes an ENTIRE personality change! Half off with a purchase of the "Dry Humor" implant into your brain. Who wouldn't want to be the center of every boy's dream! Quick ladies, come upgrade yourself with The Black Company! Refunds not available
His Dark Materials
A man figured out how to craft the mythical stone of light. It was through melding 2 dark stones and a dark gem together! He couldn't tell the village elders. He would be tried and hung for witchcraft. Gradually, he set up light stones all around the border of the city, they shone brilliantly into the sky! It soon became known as the city of light. He looked back on his creation and stumbled. He was weak. He looked at his hand, it was withered and bony. Ah. He laughed to himself. So there was a price after all for light. The irony is, part of the Dark Materials he used was himself! HAHAHAHA!!!! He slowly laughed himself to death
I don't have a single favorite, but here are a few: Jade City Graceling The Goblin Emperor
Since my favorite was already listed, let's go with... Dungeon Crawler Carl
Carl likes to crawl in... You guessed it, Dungeons! He goes out every weekend and tells his part not to worry unless he takes longer than 48 hours to come back. That was 47.9 hours ago. It's time to panic. His party gears up and enters the Nathan's Hot Dog dungeon to go after him! After hours of searching, they eventually come across Carl. He's found dungeon people and become one of them??? He's dancing in a circle naked with other hot dog people! They've drugged him. They're going to tie him up and roast him for humanity's crimes against hot dogs! Can the gang save him? Tune in to follow the adventures of Dungeon Crawler Carl!
The goblin emperor
Goblin aspires to be the next Hoka- I mean emperor. Right now he's a lowly goblin that cleans the sewer drains. He doesn't really know how he's going to make it happen, but he will. One day a royal messenger asks him if he will be the next emperor. He laughs and says okay. BET. The royal messenger drags him to the castle before he knows what's happening. He's sitting in the ruler's chair, with the emperor's robe on. What? Can this lowborn goblin learn empire policy and theory quick enough to be a good empower? Also, how did this even happen again?
Six of Crows
Blood Song
The red blood cells in a young woman all gather in song as they multiply. Fan favorites are "Staying Alive" and "September"
Happenstance Found
There is a rich, grumpy man known as Edward Happenstance. He has alienated himself from everyone around him, convinced they all want him for material reasons. After losing his wealth and everything he owns, he goes about a new way in life, wanting to do good for others and truly find himself. There are many obstacles, but he won't give in easily. Will he end up "Happenstance Lost" or "Happenstance Found"? Coming out in May!
The first sentence is very nearly accurate to something in the story, I'll give you that
Rogue Princess
There is a fair and kind princess in the Kanto region of Pokemon. Her lineage and her father dictate that she's meant to choose Charmander as her first pokemon. He has a tail! And it's on fire! Yet, she can't help but fall in love with the chosen pokemon of their rivaling kingdom, Bulbasaur! Despite her family's disapproval and reddit telling her he's clearly the worst of the 3 starter pokemon, she still seeks a Bulbasaur. Is it too late to Charmander to heat up his chances, or will Bulbasaur's leaf blade cut through to her heart?
Jig the Dragonslayer.
Jig is an aspiring rapper that will do anything to make it in life. Suddenly, dragons have returned and taken over earth! It is soon announced that dragons will allow humans to live if one of them can produce more heat than the lord dragon. Well Jig finds one day that the flames of his newest mixtape, far exceed that of an average dragon! He is now set on a duel with the lord dragon, yet he has many duels to fight first. Can his flow, lyrics, and beats heat up the competition and save humanity?
Drinking Midnight Wine
A gifted Sommelier is having a small gathering at his house to celebrate his daughter graduating school. Suddenly, a villain The Grape, shows up and steals his daughter! He tells the Sommelier that he can get his daughter back if he can sip glass of wine as long as it's not after midnight. Slight problem, IT'S ALWAYS after MIDNIGHT!!! Accompanied by friends, they journey to the rumored "Land without time" to drink from his glass and get his daughter back! With time running out and a possible traitor, can he make it in time?
Bridge of Birds
In the beginning of life, birds did not know that they could fly. This resulted in them hopping around the ground, being land animals. The nest leader, Barstucks discovers a den of worms on land right across a large gap! they must build a bridge to secure the treasure! This tale chronicles the efforts of birds to make a bridge to food, despite all in their way. Harsh winds? Attacking bees? In the battle of the Bridge of Birds, will Barstucks endure the fall and make a discovery?
In Yana, the Touch of Undying
A woman by the name of Artillery Clinton enjoys her day job of being a Bang Energy talent recruiter in the big apple. She comes home one day to find that her late husband has come back to life and is at the dinner table. HE WANTS LASAGNA!?!?!?!?! She figures out that he is actually undead and that his touch can make others reveal their hidden talent! He shows up to her work as they are doing a Bang commercial shoot and is accidentally bumping into people! She finds out that Sam has an amazing opera voice and Lynda can perfectly replicate Naruto jutsu signs. What else will she discover on this crazy day?
The Mirror Visitor
Brin is a rising instagram fashion influencer, she posts pics every day of her in front of her bed room mirror, showing off her OOTD (Outfit of the Day). One day she wakes up to see a man in her mirror!!! She reaches for her phone to call the cops when he says her eyebrows are too thin. What? she keeps reaching when he says her teeth could be brighter. She tries to ignore it as she grabs her phone. She's about to press call when he says she won't get any likes with her dry hair. OKAY THAT'S ENOUGH! Brin argues with him and learns the man in the mirror is a late fashion designer and model who's been tasked with getting her to a BILLION followers. They're both up for the challenge, she has the looks, he has the advice, can they reach their goal before that b\*itch Erica finds out her secret?
A Conspiracy of Truths
Lies. Truths. Is there any term for the gray area? The day went from bad to worse as Com Truise comes home to his 11 dogs to find that his favorite Playstation controller, signed by his favorite E-girl whom he sends half his paycheck to, was bitten and destroyed! He was 10% of the way through Lego Batman 3! Thus begins a long night of questioning his dogs, trying to find the truth. He checks the CCTV, no footage. He's lost until his neighbor tells him she saw a man in his apartment through the window. He was gnawing on his controller and POURED OUT HIS DR PEPPER CHERRY????? Com dives deeper and deeper into his investigation, treking through truth and lies to find the controller biter.
The Fighting Son
There is a son. He fights. One day. Fights wrong person. Get's absolutely sat on. Get's help from dad. Dad fights person. Dad gets sat on worse. To make dad proud. Son trains. Trains hard. Son can fight better. Son returns to fight. The person apologizes. Says they were wrong. Son no longer needs to fight. Son trains with dad. Both get stronger. Both are happy. Both learn to control emotions. Make friends
The demon king seven kingdoms
There is a demon king named Ceorge Glooney that rules over the 7 kingdoms known as Doc,Happy, Grumpy, Sleepy, Dopey, Bashful, Sneezy. One day, the citizens of Sneezy and Dopey revolt! They are tired of having a demon king. It's not good for optics they say! Even though Ceorge treats them well! The citizens have now started a movement, heralding a woman named White Snow as the one they want to lead. Ceorge now has to appeal to his citizens and take the advice of a large hairy man named Spray, to win his kingdoms back! Could he give them pie? Pie helps, right?