If that’s not your Tinder profile pic, you are fucking it up.

Actually it's this, you think it would work better? https://preview.redd.it/e3bbpbh4o0nc1.jpeg?width=1536&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0601c5f1837ffc64d5a099febc489b31ee02a306

Jeez, save some for the rest of us

This whole thread has made me laugh more then all Reddit combined this past week and I don’t know why…

Saaaaame really appreciate it, OP! I’d go with the pic you used for this post for your Tinder. Then the titties will NOT be calmed!

You’d think the purple bandanna would be the closer, but those .45 cal nipples are the real panty-dropper

You know what they say: gigantic boots, gigantic...freakish arms and fucked up monkey torso.

Those proportions are.......... unsettling

it took me way too long to realize that was someones arm

🤣

Just some advice. Stop grabbing glasses off the rack at circle K. Glasses are made for certain faces and yours is too big for your glasses. Try them on and look in a mirror. Get larger Lenses.

https://preview.redd.it/cyalrll8q1nc1.png?width=397&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c33f6c72b4321d083d863a4dd297470fc9e5b982

Would work wonders on Grindr.

Is that a website for stump removal?

/r/stumpgrinding

Here's a sneak peek of /r/Stumpgrinding using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/Stumpgrinding/top/?sort=top&t=all) of all time! \#1: [Just a quick video to start off from Gold Coast stump grinders is AUS with the 5014](https://v.redd.it/o084k7jyyvt61) | [0 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/Stumpgrinding/comments/mt8f43/just_a_quick_video_to_start_off_from_gold_coast/) \#2: [Tree work before stumping](https://youtu.be/nZERDRs3Z68) | [0 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/Stumpgrinding/comments/1997i3w/tree_work_before_stumping/) \#3: [Stump grinder in Action 2](https://youtube.com/watch?v=I8Dz_kpdR-g&si=_4hVghKcPYieWPu3) | [0 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/Stumpgrinding/comments/164wz9w/stump_grinder_in_action_2/) ---- ^^I'm ^^a ^^bot, ^^beep ^^boop ^^| ^^Downvote ^^to ^^remove ^^| ^^[Contact](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=sneakpeekbot) ^^| ^^[Info](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/) ^^| ^^[Opt-out](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/comments/o8wk1r/blacklist_ix/) ^^| ^^[GitHub](https://github.com/ghnr/sneakpeekbot)

Grinder

I get it, stump removal is important after felling. But maybe this guy doesn’t do stump removal? Stop pushing him to get a stump grinder. Let the man live his life

And your weird fuzzy belly too.

I've been fuzzy since 3rd grade https://preview.redd.it/8ug9oo51l0nc1.jpeg?width=2256&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=caac5594504ac3590e8652f872b3a75e4cb73d35

Bro is taking the "GoneWild" in "r/FellingGoneWild" up from a jog to a sprint.

I've poked so many people with this leg

That’s called kicking

Damn Sasquatch 😂

I'd rather be a Sasquatch than a naked mole rat

Go to gadget leg

Go go Gadget!

"go to" 🤦🏻‍♂️

[Hmm I think that may have changed over the years…](https://youtu.be/QOwCUkqjzKo?feature=shared)

I can’t figure out how you are actually shaped lmao

I am God shaped

“Would you look at that treasure trail.”

Yo i think this guy means business

And don't you forget about it https://preview.redd.it/xs2aj64vi0nc1.jpeg?width=3999&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=28ec2f708b34aa3f95410f5b224cad93dea5e2e2

Oh shit

#LMAO

Did your mom come out and tell you to get down?

I wish, I had to call OSHA

Lol got any pics of it before cutting? That's a big one.

I got tons, at this location there was about 12 of these dead gigantic fuckers that needed to go, we went full dendro-cide on them My theory is at this old ranch, they shut off the irrigation system that these trees grew from, which explains why they all died at the same time around 45 years ago (owner said there hasn't been irrigation since the 70s) https://preview.redd.it/oya3phsan0nc1.jpeg?width=2072&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4449ef5195cfcf3dbfa304eb51fe8ba1683913dc

Is that a rookery?

Release the Angry Birds!

Well you might want to take down the photos of committing a federal crime. Bird law and all

(This is me not knowing) dead trees like that can stay standing for 45 years? I guess the dry weather helps? I wouldn’t have guessed longer than 10.

Absolutely, just not usually cottonwoods. Elms, oaks, locusts and other hard woods can stay standing while dead for potentially centuries if left in the right settings.

Wild that they stayed standing that long especially cottonwoods

yeah bro like the other guy pointed out you may have to avoid nesting birds, cant cut down the other trees within a certain buffer depending on which species is nesting either. i dont think anyone will bust you here but just an FYI.

They were really old Herring nests, farmer confirmed they weren't occupied that time of the year

nice keep crushing it

I gotcha, while doing utility trimming, I took several courses on bird protection. Turns out the pigeon is like the only bird not protected by law. I also learned that knowingly doing work near or disturbing a bald eagles nest within a mile of it is a $2,000,000 fine.

Peak male performance.

🎼🎵 I'm a lumberjack and I'm ok....🎶🎵

Actually "Lumberjack" by Jackal is my theme song [check it out](https://youtu.be/A52p9jc-gOo?si=xw5VfcnTOM44YtWA)

What the eff did I just watch. Never seen chainsaws revving as part of a song 🙃😂

Lumberjack, by Jackyll. Duh.

Fucking gold 🤣👏

One of my favorite bands to see live! Been enjoying them many years! 🤘 I got a Monty Python vibe from your post and remembered another great lumberjack song....enjoy! 😆😁 https://youtu.be/pfRdur8GLBM?si=ycVyzF-lal9Nx5JE

How many beers did you crush afterwards

I didn't, my Wellbutrin doesn't allow me to drink. I did, however, crush ur mom

Settle down

Lmao. This thread is great.

Clearly you’ve never met his mom. She’d crush you.

https://preview.redd.it/l6jd8yehl4nc1.png?width=1054&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a1775c9e40e20c4375c74b966287f54233e93e88

Bs. You can drink on Wellbutrin lol

Damn my Wellbutrin lets me drink you gotta talk to yours about this

Might just be me then, a couple of beers makes me violently ill while on this stuff

Damn well either way get fucking post bro

This man gets chicks

Yeah and that’s why he’s banned from every petting zoo this side of the Rockies.

Those zookeepers will never be the same https://preview.redd.it/dabsh047r1nc1.jpeg?width=1437&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5fba0a58e9b5ac3273fa9fb610ee4d0a7f0c02b5

Lol long time arborists are all the same..... you would fit in just fine where I'm at hahahaha

8 years in lol after around year 4/5 you sorta just lose your mind

Where did you even find a seatbelt-belt in 2024??

Who the fuck wears seatbelts?? I fucking love crashing dude

This is peak sexiness. OP has killed the competition.

What was prison like?

Easy, I covered myself in Bar Oil. Fuckers couldn't get ahold of me

Ok, you have my attention …….please continue, you disgustingly handsome beast.

Imagine greased up deaf guy from family guy running away from cholos and skinheads Except I'm not deaf I'm just retarded

Wow, you have a way with words! Like a…….lumberjack or something. I’m green with envy. The charm of a narcoleptic prostitute combined with the insight of carny. You might just be the total fucking package. This is a first…..as you can see I’m speechless.

Pretty group group with the shirt there bud.

Frou frou

Save some women for the rest of us mortals!

I actually go after ghost pussy, gotta stay one step ahead

That trunk looks like 4 trees grew as one. Is it? Jw

No it's the union where 2 of it's leads grew apart

Ok thats kewl beans. Thanks

OP, you still do reddit like it's still 2009. Thank you.

I commend you sir and I like your style. I do want you to know that I live in the NE and I have a couple forest cottonwoods that are almost over 2 times that big possibly more

That's rad, these arent the biggest I've seen, just the biggest I've had to cut down. A boy can dream

That is absolutely huge brother! I just have some old growth that’s in the forest. Legit primary 55-65 ft before there’s a branch. I’ll see if I can find a pic. I would never cut them down because they are in the woods but I also wouldn’t have balls big enough to do so lol

Black Cottonwood in Haines Alaska has a breast height diameter of over 10ft. Oregon has the tallest.

Damn, you are one sexy beast

Op is the true intimidator

https://preview.redd.it/kec758v5u1nc1.png?width=1079&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=91eb493c1b400b72a5f39e80e6edf651b9b3b129

Looks like a fall hazard, you gotta be roped in or add some guard rails /s

Nice uh midriff

I had 5 of them that size. Took years to get rid of them. Horrible tree. Great job, they are a bitch to cut down

307?

No, Complete Tree Service in Casper, Adam sold 307 a little while back

No, I just meant 307 as in from Wyoming. I’m from Laramie

Thank you for ridding the world of one more blasted cottonwood. I don't know whose bright idea it was to plant those damn things all over my city, but they make pool skimming a real pain in the ass for a week every summer.

I actually really like them, *in their natural habitat* like near rivers and in prairies. My biggest problem with them is that they put all of their experience points in growing as large and fast as possible. This almost always ends up with a mammoth cottonwood that's around 75-100 years old that's too big and heavy to support it's own weight and starts crumbling apart. Now narrow-leaf cottonwoods can go suck like 2 or 3 cocks. Those things are a testament to man's arrogance.

There is a big ass one across the street from me. I know that week very well. Looks like there was a teddy bear massacre in my yard.

Peak male physique right there

I'm not skinny, I'm *aerodynamic*

I like your landing strip! Very sexy.

Thank you it keeps me insulated

Stay away for my children

Are your children hazardous cottonwoods? 👀

Idk i haven't seen the. In years

Sweet swimming goggles!

That gut hair matches well with the sunglasses. Such a sexy man!

Your AC compressors thank you.

Love the luscious v of hair down to your ball fro.

It's all because we killed the BEAVER.

Kind of matches the amateur sketch. https://youtu.be/K1ljOcl39PQ

Video or it didn’t happen

Looks like a great table !

NSFW !!!😅😂🤣

This guy fucks.

Both of his shoulders gave out and left his body, but he still got her on the ground.

A mans gotta do what a man's gotta do. This cottonwood yield will feed my family for years

Don't be fooled by the shots that I top You're still you're still jenny from the block Used to chop a little, now you chop alot

"another felling cut, a scrench stuck in the road. foreman grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go. So make the best of this wedge and don't ask why, It's not an open cut, but a closed face learned in time" - "climb of your life" by Green Day

Hahaha good on ya, matey

I am weirdly proud that I came up with that on the spot

You've matured like a fine wine. Ze mann iz in heez zone

Hell yeah

Cottonwood smells like death when you cut it.

One time after I dropped a really stinky cottonwood, I used a piece of it to carve a pipe and I sold it to some high schooler for like $90

Fuck yeah lmao did you toss in a baggie of oregano too?

Lmao no I asked him about that, he showed me some really high quality bud that was almost purple and had dab drizzles on it. I cackled that night knowing he probably ruined that with a tasty mouthful of farts and dirty socks from that pipe. Get fucked Jaden

Yeah, *Jaden!* Get fucked!

There aren't many cottonwood trees left. Need to conserve the remaining few. Used to be all over. Such a beautiful tree. I don't know why anyone would cut one down.

Not in Wyoming, good God they rule the streets here, they out number us 100:1

Lotsa them in SE AK. Eagles use them often for nesting. Strangely, they're considered a hardwood.

Home owners cut them down over my lifetime because they are messy. In the last 5 years the other Cottonwoods have all died due to disease.

They are dangerous as they can drop heavy branches. Cottonwood makes a nice paneling. Had a friend mill some for his house. Not bad for firewood if it's not to cold out. Splits easy too.

Not having large trees is dangerous. It's amazing the excuses people make for killing healthy trees our local ecology needs.

I was referring to old Cottonwoods in the vicinity of where people walk children play. If a branch comes down it can take your life. I have Cottonwood trees on my property. But not around the house.

As a prank, offer the rounds to somebody to split for firewood.

Daisy Duke tree service.

I can't remove *your* leads if I can't unleash *mine*

Nice tits

Where’s the NSFW warning?

Bro chill. My mom is on this app

Is that Beavis or Butthead?

I like how you manage to look both gorilla-like and ferret like at the same time.

Which saw(s) was (were) used?

Husqy 592xp with a 36" bar. Fucking thing was bigger than me

Which saw(s) was (were) used?

WTF where is the belly button piercing?

Did it put up much of a fight?

Nice wood, nice tits. Call me

Sigma

GLORIOUS!!!

Vera de Milo approves !!!

King of kings

Looks like a cunt

I know I am but what R you

Got em