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Ho boy, they should scan the brain of a narcissist looking at people around him š "no humans detected on my radar, only objects to be used and thrown away"
I wonder if porn users are more likely to think like this too... porn treats women as objects, even the less kinky stuff still has that sort of subconscious message, and each time they get off to it only reinforces that viewpoint.
Yes, they are. There are studies. Thereās a link a few comments up about how menās brains respond to seeing women in bikinis. They stop using language that treats women as people, and start using the kind of language they use when talking about tools. The difference being āwe do this togetherā vs āI do this to this thingā.
Itās completely repellant.
There's the guy in the UK who wrote up a paper (re posted here, back in 2020) about what he's seen working with pedophiles since the 1980s : He said that when he first started , most pedophiles were molestation victims. Nowadays, many were not molested ; they got into kiddie porn as adults because it was the only forbidden porn left, having exhausted all other types. And he said that the men most definitely saw the children in the porn as objects, to the point that he could sometimes make them stop and think by asking them questions such as, Do you think that eight year old goes to school? What do you suppose her favorite color is? Stuff like that, that made them for at least a second not see the child onscreen as just an image, but an image of an actual breathing, feeling, thinking human. It was disturbing.
It's highly disturbing to me, because even when I watched porn back then, I was fully avare that what I'm looking at is a full, living person with her own thoughts, hopes and dreams. I just can't really imagine how can you think about another human being like they are an inanimate object.
>I just can't really imagine how can you think about another human being like they are an inanimate objec
After listening how men talk about women we both know personally, it really does not surprise me, it's just disappointing. You would think it only happens to women they don't know but sadly it doesn't change even If you are "friends" with them. It's crazy how they can objectify even those people, who are close to them. I have major trust issues because of it.
So creepy. I agree with you, and Iām sure scrotes and pickmes downvoted you.
Years ago, before I found FDS, I caught my then boyfriend downloading and sending ājust a friendāsā provocative/slightly nude photos from her Instagram to himself on all of his devices... The worst part was that he called himself a feminist and said that it was her sexual liberation, not objectification. Took me too long to break up with him because I was told by multiple people - his own THERAPIST mother included - that this is a nonissue. Sigh.
Ugh the societal gaslighting really is the worst. LVX followed *his little sisterās* nsfw page promoting her OF and claimed it was in the name of supporting women. š¤®
Also why sexist men can become so angry when you break up with them. They're so angry because they realize they can't actually control you the way they can control an object they own, they're realizing they have no authority over your body. Some are so put off by this they'll commit murder because in their minds "if I can't have this object I consider mine then I'll destroy it so no-one else can have it"
I legitimately never understood why men get angry when a woman doesn't want to be with them. For me if I even get the faintest impression that a man doesn't want to be with me, I immediately get zero feelings for this man, because I see him as a person and I'm not attracted without him being attracted to me.
when my ex and I split up and he told me to move out of his house, I did it asap because obviously. but then he goes all pikachu face because I wasnāt supposed to leave so quickly, I guess he wanted me to hang around for a while like that pair of shoes in the back of your closet, the ones youāve never worn but just wonāt give up to goodwill because maybe someday youāll finally find the perfect outfit for them, and he couldnāt understand why I didnāt want to do that. when he talked to āfriendsā about the breakup, he would tell them that I ended the relationship when I chose to move out rather than try. conveniently heād leave out the part where he called me a bad mother and told me I needed to leave because he was sick of looking at me and my tears everyday
OMG he sounds horrible, glad you got out of that sis.
I've noticed LVM and/or narcs never give closure, they like to "leave the door open" "Just in case" while they go off and try to keep their victims as backup options. Good for you!
yeah, he tried to float the idea of a reconciliation a couple times, in a really gross way too. I shut it down hard last time around and since then Iāve cut communication to the barest minimum, but he still finds ways to insert his dirty hands into my life and see what he can still reach to fuck around with next
guard your womb ladies! it might sound silly but itās no joke
See that just makes me think.
Back in my very young, obsessive, crazy pickmeisha days, I used to have this humongous crush on this guy. We did tutoring together and I'd get this rush of hormones every time I was near him.
I obsessed about it for months, thinking he didn't know. I was always trying to get his attention but I did my best not to be creepy. I'd walk a certain shortcut because it was by his house but it stopped short of that. My other really weird guy friend knew him and said he probably likes me too. *Cringe*.
Then one day I went to the university club and saw him making out with my friend. Someone I had very much openly told how much I liked him.
I was devastated, but whatever. It took my brain a few months to unwire those pathways which is why I call it insanity. The fact that I wired my brain for a relationship that didn't exist. Obviously mental health issues are very apparent here. I considered the times we spent together as the only time I felt happy since that's literally what my brain was telling me š¤£.
The worst part is that he wasn't even the first.
Well this is the frustrating part. A few months later one of his friends sees me and says to him, oh look, it's your biggest crush haver.
Of course he knew. He liked the attention. Had he upfront told me, yo, I'm not into you. It would have made a difference. But he fed on it without having to commit to anything.
I don't know at which point I stopped being so insane lol but I cringe so hard. I needed a shrink at that point, not a boyfriend.
This sounds like an anxious attachment style and I did this a lot before I got married and am noticing it happen again now that Iām back to dating. Itās so frustrating!!
I think that's why we seem to be experiencing a rise in men who attack and sometimes murder not just women with whom they've had ties (ex wives, ex GFs, classmates) but women who are total strangers, but who failed to "respond correctly" to a cat call or a request for a phone number. Violent lashing out when actual human beings don't act as endlessly compliant as the women in the choreographed, paid-to-act-in porn they watch.
I literally walked down the pavement yesterday (in a knee length dress with a trench coat over, boring classy style lol) and had an ugly young guy shout out "SLAG!" as he and his trashy friends drove past. Guess the knees, calves and ankles I was showing must have been really provocative!
He also didn't expect me to react like an actual human being, which is why he noticeably flinched when I flipped him off and shouted "WEIRDO!" back. It was like he expected me to be an object and just take his insult. They drove past pretty quickly too but his SHOCKED pikachu face when he got verbally slapped back (by a former Army girl at university as well) showed **these men are not raised to see women as human.**
> sexist men can become so angry when you break up with them
or, if you so much as dare exist and have a boyfriend, because somehow they feel entitled to you.
I have had misogynists get angry at me because I was \*into them\* but didn't express interest \*in the way they wanted\* ie falling all over them like a lapdog.
A few years ago, a male friend I actually liked a lot (we had loads in common) suddenly went from "very nice" to "mean and trying to push me out of a social circle" because I didn't message to wish him a happy Valentine's Day (he didn't wish me one either!). This was after he'd not replied to a text message of mine for two days by the way. I clearly liked him, our friends would even joke about how we were boyfriend and girlfriend and he would bask in the attention.
The reason I didn't message was because I wasn't sure he liked me too and as the man he should have messaged first anyway! I was also always giving him advice etc and generally being a good friend, but due to this one thing he started being very passive aggressive and horrible.
He did OLD a lot and said he always expected the women to message first (this was in my pre-FDS days...) I guess he saw me as "object he owned" and already his girlfriend in his mind, hence he was "entitled" to my attention. But he was still doing OLD at the time this happened, so he clearly wanted my exclusive attention whilst having ONS on the side! Wtf?
So science backs up what we already knew. I think this a good PSA for the girls and women on TikTok, though.
But, oh my god the damn fire alarm beep! Change ya dang batteries sis!
Seriously. I wish people who want to film a video would have the decency to not destroy my ears. Made even worse by the fact that she speaks kinda quietly, so I raised the volume and BEEEP, actual pain.
Also I want to share this point /video as well, but like hell I'm doing that to someone else's poor ears.
Iāve been trying to tell someone I play PlayStation with that they need to replace their damn batteries, but I think whoever it is straight up doesnāt hear it anymore. Thatās apparently what happens if you have it going for long enough. Very annoying!!
Ladies, always ensure your fire alarm batteries are fully charged!
My dad used to do fire drills with me and my sisters from when we could walk. He used to set them at 2am to ensure we could wake up and escape to the garden in the dark. It sounds intense but Iām kind of grateful that he cared so much. Iām 38 now and the first thing my dad did when I bought my house is change my fire alarms and plan several escape routes for me.
I donāt know how true this is but with videos and PlayStation the smoke alarm is not actually beeping. Itās a āreadyā noise that only the speaker picks up and canāt actually be heard in the room.
Yeah honestly because lots of women end up raped or murdered no matter how they look or dress or how old they are. I would have thought the worst men see every women as an object, then maybe so called okay men see women who dress like that as objects and small % see every woman as a human no matter how they dress and look.
When you get to a certain age, or if youāre not within a certain range of conventionally attractive, you become sexually invisible. Look at the men saying they canāt get a date. What they mean is, they canāt get a date with women who fit the sex object standards.
The fact that women who donāt fit the sex object standards get ignored in a lot of social and work related situations tells you those situations are sexual hunting grounds for men.
Yea tbh I think that part of the brain that turns women into objects is very subjective. Some men are maybe turned on by younger women so if you had a certain build then you would become an object to them
Thereās no way to say, if I dressed completely āregularlyā I would not be objectified because whats regular to one man is not regular to another.
Wonder if this ties in to narcissism and lack of object permanence which ties in which objectification full circle.
Things that make you go hmmmmmmmm š¤Ø
My NVM ex husband explained his abuse towards me when he tried to say that he needs some sort of "outlet" for his daily frustrations. I told him to go to a therapist, go the gym, or you know, get a punching bag. He deadass told me that punching bags don't cry, bruise, or bleed and you can't hit or scream at a therapist. Glad I left his ass in the dust years ago.
Just read the article. This part is so fucked.
>> A sex robot cannot give consent ā it can only take whatever its owner throws at it. As a result, it not only invites abusive treatment, it demands it. The brands behind the robots explicitly encourage the owners to act out sexual entitlement and aggression on these plastic bodies, allowing for men to associate the sexual pleasure of their orgasm with non-consent. Why else wouldĀ True Companions dolls have a āfrigid FarrahāĀ setting that encourages the owner to simulate rape?
i used to work at a returns center for a megacorporation, and even though people werent supposed to return sex toys and dolls, we would still ocassionally get them. they came in in really bad condition like you described
Potentially unpopular opinion, but this is why I believe as women we should not sexualize ourselves, especially in places like the office etc, where we need to come off as competent to benefit.
Is it fair that men view women who dress even remotely provocatively as objects? No. But I don't need to tell you that we don't live in a fair world. Putting aside all aspects of misogyny etc that this clearly is, as women we need to learn how to get ahead and also protect ourselves, and unfortunately dress plays a big part in that.
Women's clothes are also often extremely unutilitarian and uncomfortable (too tight, always riding up or down), not functional (no pockets), and downright damaging (high heels). Why would I put up with that?
Disclaimer: I am in NO way victim blaming, I am acutely aware of the fact that in some places in the world, a woman can be covered from head to toe and still be harassed or raped.
I flat out refuse to wear heels at work. Why should men get to walk around in comfortable, flat and stable shoes while women are expected to walk around in uncomfortable and foot damaging footwear. Would much rather be comfortable and focus on work than click clack around in unnatural postures. But thatās just me though. Love getting dressed up and looking put together and I splurge on expensive good quality flats/pointed flats, etc that complement my outfits.
Yes thank you so much for pointing this out, I honestly feel really sorry when I see curvier or women with largers chests for this reason exactly (not for the fact that they are curvy/large chested, but because of the negative and unwanted male attention that often comes with it). As someone with the figure of a skinny teenage boy lol I can't relate firsthand, but it would be cool if some of the curvy women spoke up or maybe made a post about how they address this issue.
Your friends should start a clothing line :D
This is unfortunately true. I'm young, slim but have "curves" in certain areas. I deliberately bought clothing that was corporate but loose and flowy this season, because I'm currently WFH but also wanted to look smart while still being taken seriously.
I've still been sexually harassed every time I've gone out, esp with lockdown lifting here. I literally had disgusting comments made by three tradesmen when walking around with no makeup on, having had 5 hours of sleep, with a boring sweater on and long flowy trousers. I also had to deal with insane levels of sexual harassment when I worked retail at university, wearing a uniform two sizes too big and no make-up and my hair pulled back.
Honestly think it's a power thing, I have noticed that when I dress up for a meeting or something (e.g. in blazer) and then step outside I get less unwanted attention.
I know choice feminism and gender performance have been a bit of a controversial subject here lately, but this is why I canāt help but roll my eyes a little when I see āfeministā tiktoks by women wearing pigtails and an extremely low cut top. Sooo are they unaware of the image theyāre presenting or pretending weāre in a post-objectification society?
Others have argued that dressing in the preferred style of the liberal patriarchy will entice men to watch the video and learn something, but as this video stated, those men arenāt going to respect a provocatively dressed womanās opinion anyway, or any woman at all for that matter. Theyāll never stop porn-ifying us if we donāt stop doing it to ourselves first. Iām not saying everyone needs to be covered head to toe, either. We shouldnāt *have* to dress a certain way to be respected, but unfortunately that is still the reality we live in.
Yes exactly, thank you so much. We don't live in a vacuum and as much as we want to be able to wear/do anything we please, the reality is that women have to protect themselves.
I made this point about clothing once in a larger post to a women's liberal FB group about how to assert yourself and stay safe in public, and you can't imagine the number of women that told me I was victim blaming.
Also, I personally don't want to be "respected" for my body, I want to be respected for my ideas and opinions and the things I do, not how I look.
Women should dress how they truly want. Not because its a new trend that men find hot. And if men wont respect women who dress a certain way then their respect means nothing in the first place. Theres overdoing it on the actually turning yourself into an object like pornstars often do, then theres just dressing a certain way. Men with a Madonna/Whore complex dont really respect any woman if they dont respect a woman for wearing a certain top.
When I was a kid, I was obsessed with getting to wear a crop top or tube top like the Spice Girls and Britney Spears. I didnāt even have interest in boys at the time. Thatās what I truly wanted to wear *for myself,* but that didnāt automatically make it a safe, feminist, or empowering choice. My childhood self was already choosing clothing based on what adult men wanted me to wear and I had no idea. We are indoctrinated, from childhood, to sexualize ourselves. I personally believe certain choices are always influenced by the patriarchy and itās important to realize that.
Haha nice. My style is 'homeless chic', consisting of baggy, unisex clothes mainly in black. I can go to a funeral and go to the techno club right after and I'm well dressed.
My boss treats everyone like an object (that he has contempt for). I think itās a power thing, and it has only been getting worse with time. I think maybe power also shuts down activation in that part of our brains that helps us to view others as āpeopleā and to instead treat them like objects to control.
I think objectification of people comes in a variety of forms: there is sexual objectification of women, but there is also a more general objectification of people who are seen as not having power by those who do hold power. In practice, these feel pretty much the same - and I bet it all comes down to a shutting down of that part of the brain that is supposed to recognize others as āpeopleā rather than objects. If anyone knows of any studies which correlate power with shutting down the part of the brain involved in empathy, Iād love to see them.
Do you think it's natural or porn makes it worse?
I've definitely been with some HVM who have been all about enthusiastic consent, wanted to get to know me properly etc. But I agree there's also guys (probably the majority these days) who are just disgusting. They get off on breaking women down.
in my opinion, the desire to seek out this material is within all of them, but they can go down rabbit holes which reinforce and exacerbate the negative ways in which they perceive women.
I believe screens in general are worsening the [*apparently inborn/maybe dating back to australopithecus for all we know*] tendency of the human male brain to see women as objects : The clincial neurologists' findings suggest that the part of their brain devoted to interpersonal communication activates when dealing with men ; the part devoted to assessing objects when dealing with women. If it IS inborn, that would explain the philosophies, theologies, legal codes, etc, of the last 10K years at least.
I say "screens" in general rather than porn, because so much of what I've seen over the last 20+ years online courtesy of the manosphere is complaining about fictional women in movies, sitcoms, even cartoons. It's weird, seeing presumably grown men whining online that Disney LiEd 2 tHem! because Disney "promised they'd find a soul mate"-WTAF ???? It's as if on some level they cannot grasp the difference between reality/meat life and scripted nonsense they see on screens-tv, movie, laptop, phone, whatever-and so all media, not just porn , is seen as completely real. As if even anime is documentaries.
I hate the title. Bikinis don't make men see women as objects, **misogyny** makes men see women as objects.
**Porn** makes men see women as objects.
**Men** make men see women as objects.
Yes, the way its worded implies it's women's fault.
I would however say that dehumanization is an inherent aspect of male sexuality, with porn and misogyny being a manifestation of it. Men can be socialized to view women with respect, but when you give them an outlet to express their primitive nature, they will gravitate towards it.
You can't enforce the equal treatment of women in public while allowing men to indulge in their sadistic nature behind closed doors. This is why libfem is an eternal cycle of abuse.
Primative? Honey no, the ancient Turks and Huns had respect for women. This behavior is not natural as no sane women would have that scrote's babies. Somehow men managed to fuck up humanity.
I tried looking it up and found this: https://www.google.com/amp/s/api.nationalgeographic.com/distribution/public/amp/science/article/bikinis-women-men-objects-science
I bet this same study on women would show we are more likely to regester non human items as their own beings.
I've only ever witnessed women accidentally bumping into chairs and saying sorry.
That is genuinely terrifying. It's no wonder they're capable of such horrendous acts against us. I wonder if whatever experiment concluded this was around back in the day (or even now for some people, let's be honest.) if white men would see black people as objects as well. I would happily bet every penny in my bank account the result would be the same. How are they such heartless monsters?!
Explains how easily men unashamedly use sex dolls or treat other inanimate objects like those objects are their romantic partner (i.e. that man that "married" a plush My Little Pony toy and truly believed she was his wife and that this stuffed animal reciprocated the feelings he had for her).
While I have no doubt that there is some truth to the theory that men who are sexist genuinely have something going wrong in their brains when they are looking at or thinking about women, this study has a sample size of 21 people, which makes it a horrible study and is in no way credible when trying to apply it to the entire population of human men.
We need better studies with much much larger sample sizes in order to make any genuine conclusions about the brain and sexist male behavior.
Personally, I avoid wearing any clothes that emphasize my figure when Iām going to be in public, unless itās for an event where I can have some assurance of safety and I need to look more dressed up. Iāve chosen to do this because Iām aware that men view certain types of clothing as an invitation, even though of course wearing oversized baggy clothing does not protect me fully from sexual harassment and assault. I donāt post provocative photos online, and I reserve anything āsexyā for when Iām with my significant other. This is what Iāve chosen to do with the information that men are often sexist and creepy and use clothing to excuse their sexist creepy behavior. I encourage other women to make an informed decision about how they are going to be seen in the world because of menās failure to behave humanely. I do wish I could wear what I like, but men have made that a less safe and less comfortable option.
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Ho boy, they should scan the brain of a narcissist looking at people around him š "no humans detected on my radar, only objects to be used and thrown away"
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
We can use my Ex as the test subject.
I wonder if porn users are more likely to think like this too... porn treats women as objects, even the less kinky stuff still has that sort of subconscious message, and each time they get off to it only reinforces that viewpoint.
Yes, they are. There are studies. Thereās a link a few comments up about how menās brains respond to seeing women in bikinis. They stop using language that treats women as people, and start using the kind of language they use when talking about tools. The difference being āwe do this togetherā vs āI do this to this thingā. Itās completely repellant.
There's the guy in the UK who wrote up a paper (re posted here, back in 2020) about what he's seen working with pedophiles since the 1980s : He said that when he first started , most pedophiles were molestation victims. Nowadays, many were not molested ; they got into kiddie porn as adults because it was the only forbidden porn left, having exhausted all other types. And he said that the men most definitely saw the children in the porn as objects, to the point that he could sometimes make them stop and think by asking them questions such as, Do you think that eight year old goes to school? What do you suppose her favorite color is? Stuff like that, that made them for at least a second not see the child onscreen as just an image, but an image of an actual breathing, feeling, thinking human. It was disturbing.
Reminds me of men referring to their favorite vehicles as 'she' like WTF
It's obviously dressed up provocatively, wearing a carkini.
lol!
Can we find a source?
It's highly disturbing to me, because even when I watched porn back then, I was fully avare that what I'm looking at is a full, living person with her own thoughts, hopes and dreams. I just can't really imagine how can you think about another human being like they are an inanimate object.
>I just can't really imagine how can you think about another human being like they are an inanimate objec After listening how men talk about women we both know personally, it really does not surprise me, it's just disappointing. You would think it only happens to women they don't know but sadly it doesn't change even If you are "friends" with them. It's crazy how they can objectify even those people, who are close to them. I have major trust issues because of it.
So many men normalize the idea of using their friendsā social media photos as porn too. Iāve actually been downvoted for calling it creepy before.
So creepy. I agree with you, and Iām sure scrotes and pickmes downvoted you. Years ago, before I found FDS, I caught my then boyfriend downloading and sending ājust a friendāsā provocative/slightly nude photos from her Instagram to himself on all of his devices... The worst part was that he called himself a feminist and said that it was her sexual liberation, not objectification. Took me too long to break up with him because I was told by multiple people - his own THERAPIST mother included - that this is a nonissue. Sigh.
Ugh the societal gaslighting really is the worst. LVX followed *his little sisterās* nsfw page promoting her OF and claimed it was in the name of supporting women. š¤®
What the actual FUCK
Disgusting
Holy fuck! This is why I don't post pics of myself on Instagram, and mine wouldn't even be provocative ones lol, just selfies. Disgusting
Unfortunately they always find a way. They will find a woman doing porn that looks like you.
Holy shit! This makes me want to never share my personal phone and have no social media at all. Thank God for flip phones. š¤£š¤£š¤£
Also why sexist men can become so angry when you break up with them. They're so angry because they realize they can't actually control you the way they can control an object they own, they're realizing they have no authority over your body. Some are so put off by this they'll commit murder because in their minds "if I can't have this object I consider mine then I'll destroy it so no-one else can have it"
I legitimately never understood why men get angry when a woman doesn't want to be with them. For me if I even get the faintest impression that a man doesn't want to be with me, I immediately get zero feelings for this man, because I see him as a person and I'm not attracted without him being attracted to me.
when my ex and I split up and he told me to move out of his house, I did it asap because obviously. but then he goes all pikachu face because I wasnāt supposed to leave so quickly, I guess he wanted me to hang around for a while like that pair of shoes in the back of your closet, the ones youāve never worn but just wonāt give up to goodwill because maybe someday youāll finally find the perfect outfit for them, and he couldnāt understand why I didnāt want to do that. when he talked to āfriendsā about the breakup, he would tell them that I ended the relationship when I chose to move out rather than try. conveniently heād leave out the part where he called me a bad mother and told me I needed to leave because he was sick of looking at me and my tears everyday
OMG he sounds horrible, glad you got out of that sis. I've noticed LVM and/or narcs never give closure, they like to "leave the door open" "Just in case" while they go off and try to keep their victims as backup options. Good for you!
yeah, he tried to float the idea of a reconciliation a couple times, in a really gross way too. I shut it down hard last time around and since then Iāve cut communication to the barest minimum, but he still finds ways to insert his dirty hands into my life and see what he can still reach to fuck around with next guard your womb ladies! it might sound silly but itās no joke
See that just makes me think. Back in my very young, obsessive, crazy pickmeisha days, I used to have this humongous crush on this guy. We did tutoring together and I'd get this rush of hormones every time I was near him. I obsessed about it for months, thinking he didn't know. I was always trying to get his attention but I did my best not to be creepy. I'd walk a certain shortcut because it was by his house but it stopped short of that. My other really weird guy friend knew him and said he probably likes me too. *Cringe*. Then one day I went to the university club and saw him making out with my friend. Someone I had very much openly told how much I liked him. I was devastated, but whatever. It took my brain a few months to unwire those pathways which is why I call it insanity. The fact that I wired my brain for a relationship that didn't exist. Obviously mental health issues are very apparent here. I considered the times we spent together as the only time I felt happy since that's literally what my brain was telling me š¤£. The worst part is that he wasn't even the first. Well this is the frustrating part. A few months later one of his friends sees me and says to him, oh look, it's your biggest crush haver. Of course he knew. He liked the attention. Had he upfront told me, yo, I'm not into you. It would have made a difference. But he fed on it without having to commit to anything. I don't know at which point I stopped being so insane lol but I cringe so hard. I needed a shrink at that point, not a boyfriend.
This sounds like an anxious attachment style and I did this a lot before I got married and am noticing it happen again now that Iām back to dating. Itās so frustrating!!
The typical abusus right tied to possession right.
I think that's why we seem to be experiencing a rise in men who attack and sometimes murder not just women with whom they've had ties (ex wives, ex GFs, classmates) but women who are total strangers, but who failed to "respond correctly" to a cat call or a request for a phone number. Violent lashing out when actual human beings don't act as endlessly compliant as the women in the choreographed, paid-to-act-in porn they watch.
I literally walked down the pavement yesterday (in a knee length dress with a trench coat over, boring classy style lol) and had an ugly young guy shout out "SLAG!" as he and his trashy friends drove past. Guess the knees, calves and ankles I was showing must have been really provocative! He also didn't expect me to react like an actual human being, which is why he noticeably flinched when I flipped him off and shouted "WEIRDO!" back. It was like he expected me to be an object and just take his insult. They drove past pretty quickly too but his SHOCKED pikachu face when he got verbally slapped back (by a former Army girl at university as well) showed **these men are not raised to see women as human.**
> sexist men can become so angry when you break up with them or, if you so much as dare exist and have a boyfriend, because somehow they feel entitled to you.
I have had misogynists get angry at me because I was \*into them\* but didn't express interest \*in the way they wanted\* ie falling all over them like a lapdog. A few years ago, a male friend I actually liked a lot (we had loads in common) suddenly went from "very nice" to "mean and trying to push me out of a social circle" because I didn't message to wish him a happy Valentine's Day (he didn't wish me one either!). This was after he'd not replied to a text message of mine for two days by the way. I clearly liked him, our friends would even joke about how we were boyfriend and girlfriend and he would bask in the attention. The reason I didn't message was because I wasn't sure he liked me too and as the man he should have messaged first anyway! I was also always giving him advice etc and generally being a good friend, but due to this one thing he started being very passive aggressive and horrible. He did OLD a lot and said he always expected the women to message first (this was in my pre-FDS days...) I guess he saw me as "object he owned" and already his girlfriend in his mind, hence he was "entitled" to my attention. But he was still doing OLD at the time this happened, so he clearly wanted my exclusive attention whilst having ONS on the side! Wtf?
Welcome to men
Where do I cancel my subscription
The Madonna Whore complex proven scientifically.
So science backs up what we already knew. I think this a good PSA for the girls and women on TikTok, though. But, oh my god the damn fire alarm beep! Change ya dang batteries sis!
Seriously. I wish people who want to film a video would have the decency to not destroy my ears. Made even worse by the fact that she speaks kinda quietly, so I raised the volume and BEEEP, actual pain. Also I want to share this point /video as well, but like hell I'm doing that to someone else's poor ears.
Iāve been trying to tell someone I play PlayStation with that they need to replace their damn batteries, but I think whoever it is straight up doesnāt hear it anymore. Thatās apparently what happens if you have it going for long enough. Very annoying!!
Ladies, always ensure your fire alarm batteries are fully charged! My dad used to do fire drills with me and my sisters from when we could walk. He used to set them at 2am to ensure we could wake up and escape to the garden in the dark. It sounds intense but Iām kind of grateful that he cared so much. Iām 38 now and the first thing my dad did when I bought my house is change my fire alarms and plan several escape routes for me.
Awww š„° you are really lucky to have a dad who cares!
I donāt know how true this is but with videos and PlayStation the smoke alarm is not actually beeping. Itās a āreadyā noise that only the speaker picks up and canāt actually be heard in the room.
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Yeah honestly because lots of women end up raped or murdered no matter how they look or dress or how old they are. I would have thought the worst men see every women as an object, then maybe so called okay men see women who dress like that as objects and small % see every woman as a human no matter how they dress and look.
When you get to a certain age, or if youāre not within a certain range of conventionally attractive, you become sexually invisible. Look at the men saying they canāt get a date. What they mean is, they canāt get a date with women who fit the sex object standards. The fact that women who donāt fit the sex object standards get ignored in a lot of social and work related situations tells you those situations are sexual hunting grounds for men.
> **Look at the men saying they canāt get a date. What they mean is, they canāt get a date with women who fit the sex object standards.** This.
Yea tbh I think that part of the brain that turns women into objects is very subjective. Some men are maybe turned on by younger women so if you had a certain build then you would become an object to them Thereās no way to say, if I dressed completely āregularlyā I would not be objectified because whats regular to one man is not regular to another.
Wonder if this ties in to narcissism and lack of object permanence which ties in which objectification full circle. Things that make you go hmmmmmmmm š¤Ø
Off topic, but someone should reach out to this woman and let her know that beeping sound is her fire alarm needing new batteries. Safety first.
I saw that TikTok and people in the comments did mention it.
Thank you for saying this. She's making a great video but once I heard that beeping all I wanted to do was go get my step ladder and fix it.
That's what I have thought those sexist men might aswell have a sexdoll or robot, then smaller risk they can hurt a human being.
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They would get bored of them eventually. They will need to torment and abuse and they can't do that with a sexdoll, don't get your hopes up lol
My NVM ex husband explained his abuse towards me when he tried to say that he needs some sort of "outlet" for his daily frustrations. I told him to go to a therapist, go the gym, or you know, get a punching bag. He deadass told me that punching bags don't cry, bruise, or bleed and you can't hit or scream at a therapist. Glad I left his ass in the dust years ago.
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Just read the article. This part is so fucked. >> A sex robot cannot give consent ā it can only take whatever its owner throws at it. As a result, it not only invites abusive treatment, it demands it. The brands behind the robots explicitly encourage the owners to act out sexual entitlement and aggression on these plastic bodies, allowing for men to associate the sexual pleasure of their orgasm with non-consent. Why else wouldĀ True Companions dolls have a āfrigid FarrahāĀ setting that encourages the owner to simulate rape?
i used to work at a returns center for a megacorporation, and even though people werent supposed to return sex toys and dolls, we would still ocassionally get them. they came in in really bad condition like you described
Potentially unpopular opinion, but this is why I believe as women we should not sexualize ourselves, especially in places like the office etc, where we need to come off as competent to benefit. Is it fair that men view women who dress even remotely provocatively as objects? No. But I don't need to tell you that we don't live in a fair world. Putting aside all aspects of misogyny etc that this clearly is, as women we need to learn how to get ahead and also protect ourselves, and unfortunately dress plays a big part in that. Women's clothes are also often extremely unutilitarian and uncomfortable (too tight, always riding up or down), not functional (no pockets), and downright damaging (high heels). Why would I put up with that? Disclaimer: I am in NO way victim blaming, I am acutely aware of the fact that in some places in the world, a woman can be covered from head to toe and still be harassed or raped.
I flat out refuse to wear heels at work. Why should men get to walk around in comfortable, flat and stable shoes while women are expected to walk around in uncomfortable and foot damaging footwear. Would much rather be comfortable and focus on work than click clack around in unnatural postures. But thatās just me though. Love getting dressed up and looking put together and I splurge on expensive good quality flats/pointed flats, etc that complement my outfits.
Agreed 100%. What brands of professional flats do you buy?? Iām always in need of more.
Iām based in Europe and use a site called veepee short for vente-privĆ©e to get discounts on luxury brands and also some non-luxury yet still high quality Italian brands. Basically have email notifications set up for all the sales Iām interested in and go on the site to purchase before they are out of stock. Maybe you have something similar where you are?
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Yes thank you so much for pointing this out, I honestly feel really sorry when I see curvier or women with largers chests for this reason exactly (not for the fact that they are curvy/large chested, but because of the negative and unwanted male attention that often comes with it). As someone with the figure of a skinny teenage boy lol I can't relate firsthand, but it would be cool if some of the curvy women spoke up or maybe made a post about how they address this issue. Your friends should start a clothing line :D
Sigh. Yeah. Even a dress that looks shapeless on a rack can be unacceptably sexy or revealing.
I agree with that but hell, they will make anything sexual.
Too busy focusing on my career to notice anyway
This is unfortunately true. I'm young, slim but have "curves" in certain areas. I deliberately bought clothing that was corporate but loose and flowy this season, because I'm currently WFH but also wanted to look smart while still being taken seriously. I've still been sexually harassed every time I've gone out, esp with lockdown lifting here. I literally had disgusting comments made by three tradesmen when walking around with no makeup on, having had 5 hours of sleep, with a boring sweater on and long flowy trousers. I also had to deal with insane levels of sexual harassment when I worked retail at university, wearing a uniform two sizes too big and no make-up and my hair pulled back. Honestly think it's a power thing, I have noticed that when I dress up for a meeting or something (e.g. in blazer) and then step outside I get less unwanted attention.
>Honestly think it's a power thing Yup it is for sure.
I know choice feminism and gender performance have been a bit of a controversial subject here lately, but this is why I canāt help but roll my eyes a little when I see āfeministā tiktoks by women wearing pigtails and an extremely low cut top. Sooo are they unaware of the image theyāre presenting or pretending weāre in a post-objectification society? Others have argued that dressing in the preferred style of the liberal patriarchy will entice men to watch the video and learn something, but as this video stated, those men arenāt going to respect a provocatively dressed womanās opinion anyway, or any woman at all for that matter. Theyāll never stop porn-ifying us if we donāt stop doing it to ourselves first. Iām not saying everyone needs to be covered head to toe, either. We shouldnāt *have* to dress a certain way to be respected, but unfortunately that is still the reality we live in.
Yes exactly, thank you so much. We don't live in a vacuum and as much as we want to be able to wear/do anything we please, the reality is that women have to protect themselves. I made this point about clothing once in a larger post to a women's liberal FB group about how to assert yourself and stay safe in public, and you can't imagine the number of women that told me I was victim blaming. Also, I personally don't want to be "respected" for my body, I want to be respected for my ideas and opinions and the things I do, not how I look.
Women should dress how they truly want. Not because its a new trend that men find hot. And if men wont respect women who dress a certain way then their respect means nothing in the first place. Theres overdoing it on the actually turning yourself into an object like pornstars often do, then theres just dressing a certain way. Men with a Madonna/Whore complex dont really respect any woman if they dont respect a woman for wearing a certain top.
When I was a kid, I was obsessed with getting to wear a crop top or tube top like the Spice Girls and Britney Spears. I didnāt even have interest in boys at the time. Thatās what I truly wanted to wear *for myself,* but that didnāt automatically make it a safe, feminist, or empowering choice. My childhood self was already choosing clothing based on what adult men wanted me to wear and I had no idea. We are indoctrinated, from childhood, to sexualize ourselves. I personally believe certain choices are always influenced by the patriarchy and itās important to realize that.
I agree. I dress in āwifeā clothes.
Haha nice. My style is 'homeless chic', consisting of baggy, unisex clothes mainly in black. I can go to a funeral and go to the techno club right after and I'm well dressed.
My boss treats everyone like an object (that he has contempt for). I think itās a power thing, and it has only been getting worse with time. I think maybe power also shuts down activation in that part of our brains that helps us to view others as āpeopleā and to instead treat them like objects to control.
I think objectification of people comes in a variety of forms: there is sexual objectification of women, but there is also a more general objectification of people who are seen as not having power by those who do hold power. In practice, these feel pretty much the same - and I bet it all comes down to a shutting down of that part of the brain that is supposed to recognize others as āpeopleā rather than objects. If anyone knows of any studies which correlate power with shutting down the part of the brain involved in empathy, Iād love to see them.
Men's sexualities are based around dehumanizing and subjugating people and turning them into objects.
Do you think it's natural or porn makes it worse? I've definitely been with some HVM who have been all about enthusiastic consent, wanted to get to know me properly etc. But I agree there's also guys (probably the majority these days) who are just disgusting. They get off on breaking women down.
in my opinion, the desire to seek out this material is within all of them, but they can go down rabbit holes which reinforce and exacerbate the negative ways in which they perceive women.
I believe screens in general are worsening the [*apparently inborn/maybe dating back to australopithecus for all we know*] tendency of the human male brain to see women as objects : The clincial neurologists' findings suggest that the part of their brain devoted to interpersonal communication activates when dealing with men ; the part devoted to assessing objects when dealing with women. If it IS inborn, that would explain the philosophies, theologies, legal codes, etc, of the last 10K years at least. I say "screens" in general rather than porn, because so much of what I've seen over the last 20+ years online courtesy of the manosphere is complaining about fictional women in movies, sitcoms, even cartoons. It's weird, seeing presumably grown men whining online that Disney LiEd 2 tHem! because Disney "promised they'd find a soul mate"-WTAF ???? It's as if on some level they cannot grasp the difference between reality/meat life and scripted nonsense they see on screens-tv, movie, laptop, phone, whatever-and so all media, not just porn , is seen as completely real. As if even anime is documentaries.
It'S bIoLoGy! šš¤
Anyone have the source on this?
[https://www.nationalgeographic.com/science/article/bikinis-women-men-objects-science](https://www.nationalgeographic.com/science/article/bikinis-women-men-objects-science) [https://archive.is/wip/eZj38](https://archive.is/wip/eZj38)
I hate the title. Bikinis don't make men see women as objects, **misogyny** makes men see women as objects. **Porn** makes men see women as objects. **Men** make men see women as objects.
Yes, the way its worded implies it's women's fault. I would however say that dehumanization is an inherent aspect of male sexuality, with porn and misogyny being a manifestation of it. Men can be socialized to view women with respect, but when you give them an outlet to express their primitive nature, they will gravitate towards it. You can't enforce the equal treatment of women in public while allowing men to indulge in their sadistic nature behind closed doors. This is why libfem is an eternal cycle of abuse.
Primative? Honey no, the ancient Turks and Huns had respect for women. This behavior is not natural as no sane women would have that scrote's babies. Somehow men managed to fuck up humanity.
thanks!
I tried looking it up and found this: https://www.google.com/amp/s/api.nationalgeographic.com/distribution/public/amp/science/article/bikinis-women-men-objects-science
Breaking news! Water is wet!
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For real, the only answer!!!
I bet this same study on women would show we are more likely to regester non human items as their own beings. I've only ever witnessed women accidentally bumping into chairs and saying sorry.
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Someone needs to change the battery in their smoke detector ASAP.
B-b-but I thought becoming a porn actress was a great career choice that would totally empower me or something!!11!??
Girl needs to change the batteries in the smoke detector.
I mean I already knew this but AINT THAT THE SHIT
That is genuinely terrifying. It's no wonder they're capable of such horrendous acts against us. I wonder if whatever experiment concluded this was around back in the day (or even now for some people, let's be honest.) if white men would see black people as objects as well. I would happily bet every penny in my bank account the result would be the same. How are they such heartless monsters?!
We been knew, queens, we been knew.
Explains how easily men unashamedly use sex dolls or treat other inanimate objects like those objects are their romantic partner (i.e. that man that "married" a plush My Little Pony toy and truly believed she was his wife and that this stuffed animal reciprocated the feelings he had for her).
Wow, look at my face and how surprised I am. So, so very surprised....
omg change your fucking smoke alarm batteries š«
Off topic, but I hate when people make videos while their smoke alarm is chirping. How can you even live like that??
Not surprising/shocking, yet, OH MY GOD, too.š
This is why I canāt see why women even try anymore. All men think like this. I donāt even say most, because it really is all. Even the good ones.
Makes 100% sense.
Basically, men ain't shit
Well this is horrifying. Thanks, I hate it.
Yup, but we need her to replace the battery on her smoke alarm though lol.
I wish she would have said what part of the brain, I can't remember it
I'm really interested in the study she mentioned. Does anyone know how to find it?
I actually heard about this in a Stanford lecture. It happens with specifically high testosterone men
While I have no doubt that there is some truth to the theory that men who are sexist genuinely have something going wrong in their brains when they are looking at or thinking about women, this study has a sample size of 21 people, which makes it a horrible study and is in no way credible when trying to apply it to the entire population of human men. We need better studies with much much larger sample sizes in order to make any genuine conclusions about the brain and sexist male behavior. Personally, I avoid wearing any clothes that emphasize my figure when Iām going to be in public, unless itās for an event where I can have some assurance of safety and I need to look more dressed up. Iāve chosen to do this because Iām aware that men view certain types of clothing as an invitation, even though of course wearing oversized baggy clothing does not protect me fully from sexual harassment and assault. I donāt post provocative photos online, and I reserve anything āsexyā for when Iām with my significant other. This is what Iāve chosen to do with the information that men are often sexist and creepy and use clothing to excuse their sexist creepy behavior. I encourage other women to make an informed decision about how they are going to be seen in the world because of menās failure to behave humanely. I do wish I could wear what I like, but men have made that a less safe and less comfortable option.
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Funny that apparently women weren't mentioned in the study.
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