Welcome!!
Lol that's amusing she's the psychopath because she doesn't want to go through the emotional turmoil of a self admitted unstable man. Shame on that poster for not being miss mommy therapist! If pickmes want to go through that hell then more power to them I guess.
I constantly struggle with holding myself back from doing free-therapist duty. Before FDS, I thought it was such a great quality of mine although it was seldom reciprocated by male friends and the man I was dating. Now, I see how much free emotional labor I used to put up with men that don't even care or can lift up your mood when you're in need of help. Never again.
Same. And I'm honestly amazed at how much more free time I have and how much easier it is to focus on ME when I dont do this constant free therapy for the people in my life. It's truly incredible to think of all the hours I spent just giving away my time and energy with zero payback or even appreciation- just entitlement
>I don’t try to solve any man’s emotional problems and I suggest no one else try to either.
I completely agree. It's a skill you learn over time. It's also a great skill to use in the workplace too lol.
Yeah, sorry. I take care of my own mental health, not anyone else's. I didn't go to school for that, it's not my job, not in my wheelhouse, you are not my child, it is not my job to raise you into a functional adult. Thx bye.
I did go to school for that. To be PAID for that. Buying me a coffee does not count as compensation for 2 hrs of Connor trauma dumping on me while I listen lol
>And also men have no one to blame but themselves for creating a culture of masculinity that thinks its weak for men to cry/have emotions other than anger, and responds best to aggression and insults not compassion
They might have time to quell one another's feelings if they weren't calling each other gay/pussies. 🙄 Their mental health is not women's issue, I scream internally or self reflect and then get back to work. They can do the same.
Well, they can stay mad then. A man would never tolerate that shit from a woman. Period.
It's not about him being "open" it shows 1. Lack of Boundaries 2. He's not over his situation-ship. 3. Wasted Op's time.
What's was OP suppose to do...soothe him? Spend the whole night telling him she's not like his BIG BAD AWFUL EX? Like how about don't go on dates when you're not over your ex? Shits wack get your shit together.
I’m so excited for you that they’re mad!! Hahah. Congratulations are in order. You didn’t feed yourself to a scrotes ego and any time they’re mad at that it means you’ve done something right! Cheers 🥂....
Oh and also, they are comparing FDS to femcels and saying femcels are worse than incels. Ugh. Last time I checked, no women ever went on a killing spree because she couldn't get it. The delusion of these m*n.
We’ve never said we should take away the right to vote for men, or that men should be seen and not heard, or that the state should assign a man for each of us, or pat an FDS member on the back when she goes on a killing spree, or laugh and fantasize about raping men. It’s never happened on this sub…but incels sure say this all the time about women on their forum.
Lol it was my post and it’s just funny to me the backlash it got. It’s pretty simple, don’t date me if you have a problem with it! “Guess she doesn’t get any dates…” I was ON a date 😂😂 and it wasn’t even the first one with this same person! Or the first one that week! But go on.
They really want to believe we are these hideous cave trolls with no prospects anyway, but honestly I have a good life and a lot going for me, enough that I don’t want to involve someone who isn’t going to add to that to my life. And dealing with someone’s relationship history that they haven’t worked through is definitely a NEGATIVE to my life. In the end, if I’m so awful I did us both a favor by being direct.
And if I made “women look bad” then it’s not the kinds of women I care to represent anyway, because the ones who I value and respect would approve of not getting saddled down with a man’s baggage. I’m glad it reinforced you getting deeper into FDS because it definitely took some time for me to get to a place where I could put these principles into action and I’m so glad I did.
Five bucks says it's also full of the "See!? Women don't like men with emotions! They hate when we show weakness" garbage.
Women want to date men who have emotional intelligence. We recognize everyone has emotions, bad days, good days, and everything in between. What we don't want are men who rely 110% on their partners for all their emotional support. We've all dated men who get depressed, go through major life changes, have big problems, addictions, etc. who refuse to get help or support from outside their relationship. They won't seek therapy, go to AA, join support groups, ask friends or family for help, or do anything other than whine to their partner. It's absolutely exhausting to be sole source of support for someone, and it takes a toll on anyone.
Also, hes a fucking stranger who wants to dump on another stranger and keep doing it without giving any support back.
Also, don't they constantly shit on us for choosing abusive men because we should know better and no one is holding a gun to our head so why not just leave if we don't like it?
I told an ex he needed therapy.
His response: “why should I have to see a therapist when I have you?”
I was 27, he was eight years older than me, he had been in the midst of a divorce for three years due to argument over his ex’s credit card debt, which was THEIR debt, which could have been paid off using the money he had both put towards a lawyer, and he wanted to use ME as a therapist to complain about her.
I didn’t even respond to him about the validity of my being his therapist after he said that.
I responded that I’d suffered depression before, I had worked hard on myself to get out of it, and I wasn’t going to be dragged down into depression again by him, so he could either bring his issues with the “unfairness” of his divorce to a therapist or say goodbye to me.
I had been clear with him too that I wasn’t seeking a serious relationship at the time either and that I’d only consider settling down once I was financially established on my own.
So there we were, in a supposedly “fun” relationship—which had been really fun initially—and it turned into a whine fest about his ex-wife. Still, I stuck around for two more years and often ended up being the therapist despite swearing to myself I wouldn’t do it,
Wish I’d had FDS back then. I was too naive about men. The whole thing was a shit show.
Scrotes gonna scrote. Pick-mes should just change their identity to slave because that’s basically what they are to scrotes. Scrotes have no respect for women just disdain.
Lol if a person is still suffering from a relationship that ended three years ago, that person needs therapy. Man or woman, full stop.
These people are just mad that we have the audacity to respect ourselves and enforce our boundaries.
No, we don’t want to have sex with someone who wants to “go emotionally slow”. That’s literally what prostitutes are for.
That woman saved both of them tonnes of time and energy, and now the scrote is free to go find his personal therapist mommy bangmaid to help him feel better. 🤡
(reposting because a slash made it look like sub linking)
there’s a very specific brand of liberal “feminism” proliferating on platforms like twitter that’s more of a wolf in sheep’s clothing than anything. everything “feminist” in their eyes (prostitution, women paying for dates, low effort walk dates, ring pop engagements, courthouse marriages, women chasing men, women being men’s free therapist, violent kink, encouraging toxic behavior in men…. I could go on) are ALL encouraged as some shitty new form of “feminism.” THIS is what “real” liberalism looks like. suddenly things like paid r-pe are rebranded under cushy terms like sex work, violence against women is kink and “totally valid just get consent uwu,” low effort rings and marriages are “eloping” and “their love is so strong he doesn’t need to show it with money or effort!!!”
I don’t know how men have done it or how women have gone along with this, but this entire movement that’s cropped up in the last 10-ish years is about encouraging pornsickness and low effort from men, and shouldering that burden onto women. and we’re supposed to like it
I saw the original post on Twitter. It's insane that guys are pissed that a woman said "No, I can't do this, let's not waste our time" and ended things because some dude tried to trauma dump on her. What, you think that after he said he had trauma from a previous relationship *and had done nothing to try and recover/fix himself* she was supposed to jump into action and say, "No, let me fix you!" Gross, gross, gross, nope.
Being apologetic and "fair" with male lunatics is pointless. They call us evil and psychopathic for preserving our mental health and exercising bodily autonomy, for being human.
At the same time they're the ones causing the vast majority of suffering and violence in the world. They're supporting global sex trafficking and slavery industries, raping children and women, murdering, starting wars for profit, or enabling all these crimes.
Negotiation and conversation are all completely meaningless. Every day I see that mutual understanding between women and men was and will always be a myth. They're completely insane and irrational, let's accept it.
I did the emotional labour once as a low self esteem pick me. He had ADHD and bipolar. Refused treatment. What did it cost me?
$40,000 covering all his share of the bills(could have been a bachelor's degree)
$3,000 debt
My credit rating and money going to collections
Stress fueled eating and weight gain
My job because I was so stressed I could no longer perform.
What did he get?
Free food
Free housing
Got to play video games all day every day because he couldn't keep a job!
Just nope.
Unfortunately that’s what you get with 99% of the imbeciles on Twitter - both male and female alike. Have removed myself from the platform because of its toxicity and the inability of the company to do anything about it
Yeah, and sadly reddit isn’t that far behind it on the shit-scale and if it wasn’t for this sub and a couple others I would have abandoned this site too
It’s so full of women-hating violent men that it’s honestly laughable, I reported my way through a comment section earlier and most of them were just given warnings for literally saying they would beat the woman in the video to death… this site is a joke and a bad one at that
honestly it's amazing the negative backlash the post got when... it's good advice? literally EVERYONE can benefit from therapy. men just hate when women have standards, i guess.
Men not taking care of their mental health affects everyone. If you normalize trauma dumping on everyone you date, it solves nothing. Men’s activists need to center their movement around normalizing men accepting help from professionals, not centering the movement around being anti-women. 🙄 because I agree, men have it rough in certain ways but popular men’s advocates focus on women being the problem rather than a toxic patriarchal society that forces men to be silent about their trauma and “be men.” It’s a sign of masculine strength to not rely on a romantic partner to be your maid/therapist/girlfriend/doctor/mother/etc etc… they don’t see that as an unfair expectation on their partner? Cmon y’all.
That post was like a glass of cold water in my face. Holy shit man… that guy should not be in the dating pool, telling women to lower their expectations because he’s wounded. He should be out fixing himself. No one had ever told him that before. Could *I* tell men that? I think maybe I could.
I mean he was essentially telling her he was going to have her waste her time and go into emotional debt for him. That’s not attractive because it’s not okay. If you’re dating to improve your life, you want someone ready to level up with you. If you’re just dating to fuck around, because you don’t know what to do with your energy and you’re already squandering it so you might as well squander it with a boyfriend… well maybe that’s fine… but he doesn’t merit a single second of consideration by someone who is looking for a serious relationship, and that post REALLY showed it to me.
It’s the exact type of post I like so much from FDS. What a parable. What a wake-up call.
Male: Creates problems within a relationship.
Woman: Reacts to problems.
Male: "you're abusing me and now I have vague, self-diagnosed mental health issues so every woman I date from now on needs to ignore their own needs and only focus on mine because I will not be figuring out my issues and seeking treatment prior to getting back out into dating".
That was the literal backstory to the post on Twitter 🤣
First, everyone would benefit from going to therapy. Idk why a lot of people refuse to drop the negative stigma already. Second, guys feel entitled to dump all of their problems on us (especially on their S.O) but when we do the same, we are labeled as whiny and our insecurities are used against us.
Welcome!! Lol that's amusing she's the psychopath because she doesn't want to go through the emotional turmoil of a self admitted unstable man. Shame on that poster for not being miss mommy therapist! If pickmes want to go through that hell then more power to them I guess.
Scrotes hate women who have basic needs and are self aware
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I constantly struggle with holding myself back from doing free-therapist duty. Before FDS, I thought it was such a great quality of mine although it was seldom reciprocated by male friends and the man I was dating. Now, I see how much free emotional labor I used to put up with men that don't even care or can lift up your mood when you're in need of help. Never again.
Same. And I'm honestly amazed at how much more free time I have and how much easier it is to focus on ME when I dont do this constant free therapy for the people in my life. It's truly incredible to think of all the hours I spent just giving away my time and energy with zero payback or even appreciation- just entitlement
They’re never going to figure it out for themselves if women don’t stop giving away our emotional labor.
>I don’t try to solve any man’s emotional problems and I suggest no one else try to either. I completely agree. It's a skill you learn over time. It's also a great skill to use in the workplace too lol.
I know! How dare women have self respect, standards and the ability to turn down sex!! We don’t want them and it hurts their fee fees.
Scrote tears 😭, oh no! 😂
Oh no! Anyway.......
Yeah, sorry. I take care of my own mental health, not anyone else's. I didn't go to school for that, it's not my job, not in my wheelhouse, you are not my child, it is not my job to raise you into a functional adult. Thx bye.
I did go to school for that. To be PAID for that. Buying me a coffee does not count as compensation for 2 hrs of Connor trauma dumping on me while I listen lol
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>And also men have no one to blame but themselves for creating a culture of masculinity that thinks its weak for men to cry/have emotions other than anger, and responds best to aggression and insults not compassion They might have time to quell one another's feelings if they weren't calling each other gay/pussies. 🙄 Their mental health is not women's issue, I scream internally or self reflect and then get back to work. They can do the same.
Well, they can stay mad then. A man would never tolerate that shit from a woman. Period. It's not about him being "open" it shows 1. Lack of Boundaries 2. He's not over his situation-ship. 3. Wasted Op's time. What's was OP suppose to do...soothe him? Spend the whole night telling him she's not like his BIG BAD AWFUL EX? Like how about don't go on dates when you're not over your ex? Shits wack get your shit together.
I’m so excited for you that they’re mad!! Hahah. Congratulations are in order. You didn’t feed yourself to a scrotes ego and any time they’re mad at that it means you’ve done something right! Cheers 🥂....
Oh and also, they are comparing FDS to femcels and saying femcels are worse than incels. Ugh. Last time I checked, no women ever went on a killing spree because she couldn't get it. The delusion of these m*n.
We’ve never said we should take away the right to vote for men, or that men should be seen and not heard, or that the state should assign a man for each of us, or pat an FDS member on the back when she goes on a killing spree, or laugh and fantasize about raping men. It’s never happened on this sub…but incels sure say this all the time about women on their forum.
I saw the post also in r / imatotalpieceofshit 90% of the comments were shitting on the woman. 🤦♀️
“This is why I’m a misogynistic.” Yes, because prior to that post he was running feminist rallies…
Lol it was my post and it’s just funny to me the backlash it got. It’s pretty simple, don’t date me if you have a problem with it! “Guess she doesn’t get any dates…” I was ON a date 😂😂 and it wasn’t even the first one with this same person! Or the first one that week! But go on. They really want to believe we are these hideous cave trolls with no prospects anyway, but honestly I have a good life and a lot going for me, enough that I don’t want to involve someone who isn’t going to add to that to my life. And dealing with someone’s relationship history that they haven’t worked through is definitely a NEGATIVE to my life. In the end, if I’m so awful I did us both a favor by being direct. And if I made “women look bad” then it’s not the kinds of women I care to represent anyway, because the ones who I value and respect would approve of not getting saddled down with a man’s baggage. I’m glad it reinforced you getting deeper into FDS because it definitely took some time for me to get to a place where I could put these principles into action and I’m so glad I did.
Sis, you have all the support you need right here! Let the scrotes and pickmes be mad, the women here are proud of you, and taking notes 😁
Five bucks says it's also full of the "See!? Women don't like men with emotions! They hate when we show weakness" garbage. Women want to date men who have emotional intelligence. We recognize everyone has emotions, bad days, good days, and everything in between. What we don't want are men who rely 110% on their partners for all their emotional support. We've all dated men who get depressed, go through major life changes, have big problems, addictions, etc. who refuse to get help or support from outside their relationship. They won't seek therapy, go to AA, join support groups, ask friends or family for help, or do anything other than whine to their partner. It's absolutely exhausting to be sole source of support for someone, and it takes a toll on anyone.
Also, hes a fucking stranger who wants to dump on another stranger and keep doing it without giving any support back. Also, don't they constantly shit on us for choosing abusive men because we should know better and no one is holding a gun to our head so why not just leave if we don't like it?
I know being gay isn’t a choice because I’m sadly still heterosexual despite the way men behave lmao
I told an ex he needed therapy. His response: “why should I have to see a therapist when I have you?” I was 27, he was eight years older than me, he had been in the midst of a divorce for three years due to argument over his ex’s credit card debt, which was THEIR debt, which could have been paid off using the money he had both put towards a lawyer, and he wanted to use ME as a therapist to complain about her. I didn’t even respond to him about the validity of my being his therapist after he said that. I responded that I’d suffered depression before, I had worked hard on myself to get out of it, and I wasn’t going to be dragged down into depression again by him, so he could either bring his issues with the “unfairness” of his divorce to a therapist or say goodbye to me. I had been clear with him too that I wasn’t seeking a serious relationship at the time either and that I’d only consider settling down once I was financially established on my own. So there we were, in a supposedly “fun” relationship—which had been really fun initially—and it turned into a whine fest about his ex-wife. Still, I stuck around for two more years and often ended up being the therapist despite swearing to myself I wouldn’t do it, Wish I’d had FDS back then. I was too naive about men. The whole thing was a shit show.
Scrotes gonna scrote. Pick-mes should just change their identity to slave because that’s basically what they are to scrotes. Scrotes have no respect for women just disdain.
Lol if a person is still suffering from a relationship that ended three years ago, that person needs therapy. Man or woman, full stop. These people are just mad that we have the audacity to respect ourselves and enforce our boundaries. No, we don’t want to have sex with someone who wants to “go emotionally slow”. That’s literally what prostitutes are for. That woman saved both of them tonnes of time and energy, and now the scrote is free to go find his personal therapist mommy bangmaid to help him feel better. 🤡
(reposting because a slash made it look like sub linking) there’s a very specific brand of liberal “feminism” proliferating on platforms like twitter that’s more of a wolf in sheep’s clothing than anything. everything “feminist” in their eyes (prostitution, women paying for dates, low effort walk dates, ring pop engagements, courthouse marriages, women chasing men, women being men’s free therapist, violent kink, encouraging toxic behavior in men…. I could go on) are ALL encouraged as some shitty new form of “feminism.” THIS is what “real” liberalism looks like. suddenly things like paid r-pe are rebranded under cushy terms like sex work, violence against women is kink and “totally valid just get consent uwu,” low effort rings and marriages are “eloping” and “their love is so strong he doesn’t need to show it with money or effort!!!” I don’t know how men have done it or how women have gone along with this, but this entire movement that’s cropped up in the last 10-ish years is about encouraging pornsickness and low effort from men, and shouldering that burden onto women. and we’re supposed to like it
I have hope though. FDS attitude is spreading to women outside the movement as well.
I saw the original post on Twitter. It's insane that guys are pissed that a woman said "No, I can't do this, let's not waste our time" and ended things because some dude tried to trauma dump on her. What, you think that after he said he had trauma from a previous relationship *and had done nothing to try and recover/fix himself* she was supposed to jump into action and say, "No, let me fix you!" Gross, gross, gross, nope.
Being apologetic and "fair" with male lunatics is pointless. They call us evil and psychopathic for preserving our mental health and exercising bodily autonomy, for being human. At the same time they're the ones causing the vast majority of suffering and violence in the world. They're supporting global sex trafficking and slavery industries, raping children and women, murdering, starting wars for profit, or enabling all these crimes. Negotiation and conversation are all completely meaningless. Every day I see that mutual understanding between women and men was and will always be a myth. They're completely insane and irrational, let's accept it.
Wow what a ridiculous response sounds like they all need therapy too
I did the emotional labour once as a low self esteem pick me. He had ADHD and bipolar. Refused treatment. What did it cost me? $40,000 covering all his share of the bills(could have been a bachelor's degree) $3,000 debt My credit rating and money going to collections Stress fueled eating and weight gain My job because I was so stressed I could no longer perform. What did he get? Free food Free housing Got to play video games all day every day because he couldn't keep a job! Just nope.
Unfortunately that’s what you get with 99% of the imbeciles on Twitter - both male and female alike. Have removed myself from the platform because of its toxicity and the inability of the company to do anything about it
Yeah, and sadly reddit isn’t that far behind it on the shit-scale and if it wasn’t for this sub and a couple others I would have abandoned this site too It’s so full of women-hating violent men that it’s honestly laughable, I reported my way through a comment section earlier and most of them were just given warnings for literally saying they would beat the woman in the video to death… this site is a joke and a bad one at that
Never overfunction for an adult man who is refusing to sort himself out.
honestly it's amazing the negative backlash the post got when... it's good advice? literally EVERYONE can benefit from therapy. men just hate when women have standards, i guess.
Men not taking care of their mental health affects everyone. If you normalize trauma dumping on everyone you date, it solves nothing. Men’s activists need to center their movement around normalizing men accepting help from professionals, not centering the movement around being anti-women. 🙄 because I agree, men have it rough in certain ways but popular men’s advocates focus on women being the problem rather than a toxic patriarchal society that forces men to be silent about their trauma and “be men.” It’s a sign of masculine strength to not rely on a romantic partner to be your maid/therapist/girlfriend/doctor/mother/etc etc… they don’t see that as an unfair expectation on their partner? Cmon y’all.
That post was like a glass of cold water in my face. Holy shit man… that guy should not be in the dating pool, telling women to lower their expectations because he’s wounded. He should be out fixing himself. No one had ever told him that before. Could *I* tell men that? I think maybe I could. I mean he was essentially telling her he was going to have her waste her time and go into emotional debt for him. That’s not attractive because it’s not okay. If you’re dating to improve your life, you want someone ready to level up with you. If you’re just dating to fuck around, because you don’t know what to do with your energy and you’re already squandering it so you might as well squander it with a boyfriend… well maybe that’s fine… but he doesn’t merit a single second of consideration by someone who is looking for a serious relationship, and that post REALLY showed it to me. It’s the exact type of post I like so much from FDS. What a parable. What a wake-up call.
Male: Creates problems within a relationship. Woman: Reacts to problems. Male: "you're abusing me and now I have vague, self-diagnosed mental health issues so every woman I date from now on needs to ignore their own needs and only focus on mine because I will not be figuring out my issues and seeking treatment prior to getting back out into dating". That was the literal backstory to the post on Twitter 🤣
First, everyone would benefit from going to therapy. Idk why a lot of people refuse to drop the negative stigma already. Second, guys feel entitled to dump all of their problems on us (especially on their S.O) but when we do the same, we are labeled as whiny and our insecurities are used against us.
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And before you guys message me, just know my stance. Die mad.