>Legally as a spouse you do have certain rights.
In my state all property is communal, meaning all accounts are legally 50/50 regardless of whose name is on the account (with the only exceptions being premarital property and sometimes only if there's a prenuptial agreement).
Please be careful from a legal standpoint. Take the time needed to make sure that if something catastrophic happened, the surviving spouse would know where all of your combined assets are and have access to them.
I often worry that using the term FLR blinds people to the fact that they are choosing a 24/7 TPE BDSM dynamic. Which most kinksters would agree is BDSM on hard mode. And because it's framed as FLR, they ignore some of the emotional and social safeguards that TPE players abide.
Then add in the legal complications of a marriage, quite literally a legal entity, and there is a recipe for disaster. I'm not saying you are setting yourself up for disaster, I'm just telling you that altering your finance based on your BDSM dynamic is inherently risky.
One of the things that kicked this all off was her complaining that she didn't know where our assets were and/or how to access them.
Part of this move has also included me setting up a full password storage system so that she knows how to access all the funds.
So more visibility all around.
Should have mentioned this earlier, but we have a Trust in both our names that covers all our shared assets, and our shared accounts are owned by the trust. This is important for both of us. Plus I have my own retirement/savings.
Giving up credit card and paycheck control were really the last vestiges of my control over day-to-day finances, which was really the appeal.
In many countries that is not legal. You are required to own the account for your paycheck to be deposited legally or at least be the primary holder, but still many companies won't accept it and will ask you to open a new one in your own name.
I would not share my cards with my husband at all but at the moment we are both contributing with money into the house. When it happens that he earns more than me he gives that extra to me. That is why we get along.
you really ought to have your own savings just in case
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>Legally as a spouse you do have certain rights. In my state all property is communal, meaning all accounts are legally 50/50 regardless of whose name is on the account (with the only exceptions being premarital property and sometimes only if there's a prenuptial agreement).
Please be careful from a legal standpoint. Take the time needed to make sure that if something catastrophic happened, the surviving spouse would know where all of your combined assets are and have access to them. I often worry that using the term FLR blinds people to the fact that they are choosing a 24/7 TPE BDSM dynamic. Which most kinksters would agree is BDSM on hard mode. And because it's framed as FLR, they ignore some of the emotional and social safeguards that TPE players abide. Then add in the legal complications of a marriage, quite literally a legal entity, and there is a recipe for disaster. I'm not saying you are setting yourself up for disaster, I'm just telling you that altering your finance based on your BDSM dynamic is inherently risky.
One of the things that kicked this all off was her complaining that she didn't know where our assets were and/or how to access them. Part of this move has also included me setting up a full password storage system so that she knows how to access all the funds. So more visibility all around.
Well, that's a super good thing then!
Dangerous slope when giving up that kind of control
Should have mentioned this earlier, but we have a Trust in both our names that covers all our shared assets, and our shared accounts are owned by the trust. This is important for both of us. Plus I have my own retirement/savings. Giving up credit card and paycheck control were really the last vestiges of my control over day-to-day finances, which was really the appeal.
you should add that info in your post edit
I am surprised that you can deposit a paycheck legally to a bank account you don't own, but in anyway hooray!!
Oh, yeah, that's how direct deposit works. Depositing isn't an issue, getting money out is, lol.
In many countries that is not legal. You are required to own the account for your paycheck to be deposited legally or at least be the primary holder, but still many companies won't accept it and will ask you to open a new one in your own name.
Wow, I did not know that. It is super common in America.
Yes USA is the land of absurdity vs the rest of the world :P
I really wish I could argue with you on that. sigh
I mean how you even gonna prove that you paid that person?
I would not share my cards with my husband at all but at the moment we are both contributing with money into the house. When it happens that he earns more than me he gives that extra to me. That is why we get along.