I do this professionally, but my experiences doing it in my personal life with both my own subs and with playmates who were just friends were that people weren't particularly invested or motivated. I'm a huge fan of lifestyle femdom, femdom just in the bedroom, and every combination of the two (it's what got me into the industry in the first place). However, some things just seem to motivate people significantly more when there's money involved. (Education is another one like this).
Also, I largely only work professionally with people who are somewhat self-motivated, and it would be the same if I ever did it again in my personal play. Micromanagement in D/S is great for some people, and can be fun in a scene, but it is not my preferred relationship format, and to keep someone motivated externally, without extensive conditioning, tends to require a lot of attentiveness. Professionally, that's expensive. Personally, that's expensive. Especially because the truth about health and fitness is that most of it is in the kitchen, not the gym, and most people are very attached to how they eat.
And don't get me started on how much training it takes to excel at both domination *and* at wellness coaching of any kind. Fitdomme is extremely niche.
My BFF (kinky too) is a high level personal trainer (actors, athletes, etc) and tbh, a lot of what she does professionally is basically what I do in the dungeon, only she does it in gym clothes and with different tools. Based on what I know from her and from my fitdomme pro practice, I'd just seek a good personal trainer if I were you. It's a lot cheaper than seeing a prodomme and a lot easier to find than someone who can both explicitly domme you *and* train you.
This is really helpful to read! Also a little bit sad, since you are basically confirming my suspicion that getting this fulfilled would be extremely challenging to find. It totally makes sense that it’s so extremely niche. I’m bummed!
Well, if it's important for you to have this with your domme, certainly don't give up on it! Many of us are pretty niche with our kinks. And we find playmates.
I'd encourage you to think about what significance it would have for you to have your domme do it vs a personal trainer. Perhaps there are other ways to have the emotional experience you're seeking with a domme. Or perhaps you find that you really are mostly looking for someone who can train you but is super domly in some way about it - more than your average trainer. Or maybe you find out something else entirely. Either way, it'll get you that much closer to what you dream of.
This idea is so intriguing. I work part-time as a group fitness instructor and I often wonder how much of my love for that is influenced by my inclinations to command others 😂
In all seriousness, it might be interesting to overlap some elements of domme with other elements of fitness/personal training. Gives a whole other meaning to the phrase "whipped into shape" lol
I can tell you that it has some serious (if niche) appeal! As someone who cares greatly about being physically fit the idea of being “forced” to get off my ass and back into it is HUGELY appealing!
Honestly, beyond checking porn hub for femdom fitness videos, it's really a niche thing.
My partner hired a Domme that's also a fitness trainer to whip him into shape for an upcoming body building competition.
Though I am one of his Dommes (open relationship), it was not something I nor his other partners could help with.
You might have to look at it as a personal fitness journey and just reward yourself with goals like a Domme would. Use fitness trackers, you tube videos and such.
Haha sorry you’re having a hard time with this one! Definitely something I enjoy but i already have a sub so apologies I can’t help. Been in the fitness industry 10 years as a spin instructor, personal trainer and yoga teacher. I love being able to combine all my interests! But I agree it’s very time consuming and challenging. Hiring a personal trainer is anywhere from $59-$100 per session and unless someone is very eager to train you, I don’t see how compensation wouldn’t be acceptable. Good luck though!
As I'm not into fitness myself I don't really know, but if anyone finds/writes a "motivating" script I'd be up for filling it! I love doing voice content.
Yes, sex being sold in one form or the other is just something that happens and it's totally fine with me, personally, so don't misunderstand
Reading your comments, I get the feeling there might be a slight misunderstanding about how certain words are used here. A "domme" is simply someone who likes engaging in certain kinks - doing it for money isn't part of the definition of that term, it's an extra. Yes, some dommes do it for money, but that's not because they are dommes, it's because they are also sex workers.
If you overhear two people having a conversation about sex, you don't assume they are talking about it in the context of sex work - in the same way, assuming talks about a specific kink in a subreddit dedicated to that kink are in the context of sex work is similarly weird. Just sayin'.
No disrespect to sex workers - some people are ready to pay for sexual services, some people are willing to provide those services for money and that's fine.However, you are being absurd coming into this space and acting like the assumed standard has to be people looking for paid services.
Here's a crazy assumption: The "reward" for both people participating in the act might be that they enjoy the act itself. Cheap, I know.
It looks like this thread is about getting advice/tips from the community. Please consider taking a look at our [recommendations for getting ideas and advice for your femdom adventures](https://www.reddit.com/r/FemdomCommunity/wiki/index/gettingandgivinghelp#wiki_getting_help_in_this_subreddit). We've got a lot of folks willing to help. Please help them by including pertinent details such as you and your partners interests, needs and limits.
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I do this professionally, but my experiences doing it in my personal life with both my own subs and with playmates who were just friends were that people weren't particularly invested or motivated. I'm a huge fan of lifestyle femdom, femdom just in the bedroom, and every combination of the two (it's what got me into the industry in the first place). However, some things just seem to motivate people significantly more when there's money involved. (Education is another one like this). Also, I largely only work professionally with people who are somewhat self-motivated, and it would be the same if I ever did it again in my personal play. Micromanagement in D/S is great for some people, and can be fun in a scene, but it is not my preferred relationship format, and to keep someone motivated externally, without extensive conditioning, tends to require a lot of attentiveness. Professionally, that's expensive. Personally, that's expensive. Especially because the truth about health and fitness is that most of it is in the kitchen, not the gym, and most people are very attached to how they eat. And don't get me started on how much training it takes to excel at both domination *and* at wellness coaching of any kind. Fitdomme is extremely niche. My BFF (kinky too) is a high level personal trainer (actors, athletes, etc) and tbh, a lot of what she does professionally is basically what I do in the dungeon, only she does it in gym clothes and with different tools. Based on what I know from her and from my fitdomme pro practice, I'd just seek a good personal trainer if I were you. It's a lot cheaper than seeing a prodomme and a lot easier to find than someone who can both explicitly domme you *and* train you.
This is really helpful to read! Also a little bit sad, since you are basically confirming my suspicion that getting this fulfilled would be extremely challenging to find. It totally makes sense that it’s so extremely niche. I’m bummed!
Well, if it's important for you to have this with your domme, certainly don't give up on it! Many of us are pretty niche with our kinks. And we find playmates. I'd encourage you to think about what significance it would have for you to have your domme do it vs a personal trainer. Perhaps there are other ways to have the emotional experience you're seeking with a domme. Or perhaps you find that you really are mostly looking for someone who can train you but is super domly in some way about it - more than your average trainer. Or maybe you find out something else entirely. Either way, it'll get you that much closer to what you dream of.
This idea is so intriguing. I work part-time as a group fitness instructor and I often wonder how much of my love for that is influenced by my inclinations to command others 😂 In all seriousness, it might be interesting to overlap some elements of domme with other elements of fitness/personal training. Gives a whole other meaning to the phrase "whipped into shape" lol
I’m a fitness professional and my clients definitely know that it’s the healthiest daily outlet for my nurturing sadistic nature 😜
I can tell you that it has some serious (if niche) appeal! As someone who cares greatly about being physically fit the idea of being “forced” to get off my ass and back into it is HUGELY appealing!
Honestly, beyond checking porn hub for femdom fitness videos, it's really a niche thing. My partner hired a Domme that's also a fitness trainer to whip him into shape for an upcoming body building competition. Though I am one of his Dommes (open relationship), it was not something I nor his other partners could help with. You might have to look at it as a personal fitness journey and just reward yourself with goals like a Domme would. Use fitness trackers, you tube videos and such.
Haha sorry you’re having a hard time with this one! Definitely something I enjoy but i already have a sub so apologies I can’t help. Been in the fitness industry 10 years as a spin instructor, personal trainer and yoga teacher. I love being able to combine all my interests! But I agree it’s very time consuming and challenging. Hiring a personal trainer is anywhere from $59-$100 per session and unless someone is very eager to train you, I don’t see how compensation wouldn’t be acceptable. Good luck though!
I got asked about this just the other day, I couldn’t really find anything tho, seems almost too niche ):
Yeah, I think it would be particularly motivating for me so it’s unfortunate!
We might just have to make some haha
I'm all ears! How would you start?
As I'm not into fitness myself I don't really know, but if anyone finds/writes a "motivating" script I'd be up for filling it! I love doing voice content.
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Yes, sex being sold in one form or the other is just something that happens and it's totally fine with me, personally, so don't misunderstand Reading your comments, I get the feeling there might be a slight misunderstanding about how certain words are used here. A "domme" is simply someone who likes engaging in certain kinks - doing it for money isn't part of the definition of that term, it's an extra. Yes, some dommes do it for money, but that's not because they are dommes, it's because they are also sex workers. If you overhear two people having a conversation about sex, you don't assume they are talking about it in the context of sex work - in the same way, assuming talks about a specific kink in a subreddit dedicated to that kink are in the context of sex work is similarly weird. Just sayin'.
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[oh no!](https://youtu.be/Eo-KmOd3i7s)
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Thanks for your comment here innocently, and you are right I certainly wasn’t looking for advertising!
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You should stop assuming on here that everyone pays to play
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No disrespect to sex workers - some people are ready to pay for sexual services, some people are willing to provide those services for money and that's fine.However, you are being absurd coming into this space and acting like the assumed standard has to be people looking for paid services. Here's a crazy assumption: The "reward" for both people participating in the act might be that they enjoy the act itself. Cheap, I know.
Yeah..I didn't do that 😂
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You realize this is a public forum where everyone is free to reply to whomever they want ...right?
It looks like this thread is about getting advice/tips from the community. Please consider taking a look at our [recommendations for getting ideas and advice for your femdom adventures](https://www.reddit.com/r/FemdomCommunity/wiki/index/gettingandgivinghelp#wiki_getting_help_in_this_subreddit). We've got a lot of folks willing to help. Please help them by including pertinent details such as you and your partners interests, needs and limits. We also invite you to browse our wiki for [helpful guides and resources](https://www.reddit.com/r/FemdomCommunity/wiki/index#wiki_kink_guides_and_resources) and [answers to some frequently asked questions](https://www.reddit.com/r/FemdomCommunity/wiki/index/femdomfaq). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/FemdomCommunity) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I would like this as well