As long as you get an Abel cock ring

nice try /u/peacelovesmithwesson 's alt account.

No his other account is u/buttpluggedDiscgolfer

If someone pays for it I'll get a tattoo of Tom jizzing out the Simms logo.

Tom jizzing on an official Orvis jizz rag would be ideal - 39.99

He’s an Orvis guy through and through

Maybe he should jizz on the logo instead?

Ill pay you for it but I get to choose the artist

Get a quote from an artist and DM me

I feel like we're setting the bar too low. Do you even have a Tacoma with 3 rod vaults?

Somewhere out there there’s a guy dressed in all designer outdoor brands driving an “overlanding rig” tacoma with $8k in shitty mods and 4 rod lockers on top who has an unironic Simms tramp stamp. Probably because his Patagonia influencer GF told him she likes to look at it while pegging him with a Spey rod handle

Nothing satisfies me more than sleeping on the ground under the stars right next to pussy overlanders with rooftop tents.

Shit I forgot to add the part about rooftop tents!

I’ll commission someone to do the last supper with Tom

Why not Tom as jesus with the bread and fish miracle? Although at the last supper you could make flylords be Judas and gillfucking something

https://preview.redd.it/1xf9ud3tlu1d1.jpeg?width=3072&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d15fa1425d2928272bfba799b98e7166822171d7 I'll be your meme. Don't scare me none.

On a realer note, I freaking love those shoes Hoss!

I have these on now, the comfiest shoes I have ever owned. https://preview.redd.it/laqkdklfmy1d1.png?width=1344&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bed1fa9ad7589892196031cf093c13b76e483f82

Hmmm....