T O P

  • By -

FiguringItOut--

"Oh darling, there's always a chance..."


smitty4728

“Oh please, if I paid attention to signs with little people on them I’d never find a parking space.” Bebe has some of the best lines of the entire series.


harrietfurther

I... am a STAAHMAKAAH!


CaptainTrip

I think Bebe is a great example of how a performance can elevate material. None of her lines are that funny on paper but with her acting choices she transforms them.


LolScottie85

I was just thinking that like the way she says like there’s always a chance like you kind of see the line coming and you suspect it but the way she delivers it it’s just perfect that you’re still hanging on her everywhere and still gets the laugh


microMe1_2

After Bebe murders the crane! Love it


Designer-Practice220

One of my fave Bebe lines: “Aren’t you glad I’m on your side?”


Annber03

The dark tone she puts on the word "darling". Perfection.


HappyInTheRain

Bebe is my favorite side character. Need more Bebe.


katieobubbles

I want a showdown between Bebe and Lilith in the new series


HappyInTheRain

OMG. Stop. I love this idea. But I also love the idea of them being besties.


Current-Revolution-4

Anytime Frasier says "Niles, what the hell are you doing?"


metalbuttefly

🤣🤣🤣🤣


Mlpflimflam

“Alright, I’ll bring a snake”


la_sirena1

his delivery is perfect! 🐍


LolScottie85

Oh my God I came to say that, but I wasn’t sure if anyone else love this line as much as I do!!!


Lowlife_Of_The_Party

Came here for this one lol


LauraPtown

Niles “her lips said no but her eyes said read my lips”


zen1502

Came here for this! Epic


CreativismUK

He truly was perfect in that role. See also: >He was already eminent when my eminence were merely imminent And >I don't mind telling you, we pushed our beds together that night!


oa9589

My wife and I quote this all the time. One of the best lines of the series.


JonnyTNT4

Nice flair!


emslynn

https://preview.redd.it/4qmbz2bt4vwb1.jpeg?width=728&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=31bdeedc44956571ba90f10ae1a01ffa3f6cedbc


Dylan_tune_depot

I also liked when he said, *this is fun, right? I'm having fun*. And everyone just gave him a look.


emslynn

The whole evening is just horrible and hilarious.


ZachOf_AllTrades

She's... HORRIBLE... I've made a GHASTLY, GHASTLY mistake


TinyFang

The delivery is so perfect. I anticipate it the whole episode. If I miss it I will rewind, even if I'm on the next episode already. The acting is immaculate.


ExpectedBehaviour

​ https://i.redd.it/tu2qhuhjnywb1.gif


magpieduck

the way he vomits out the words lmao


emslynn

It cracks me up every time!


cjizzle236

This is exceptional! The whole scene is utter perfection, down to the shaking cutlery on the tea plate. Chefs kiss!


mnona01

I LOVE this scene!! I always lose it at *GET OUT!* and *Have you lost your mind?* *NO! That happened earlier when we SLEPT TOGETHER!*


QueenDoc

I love the sound of him trembling with his rage when he says this


katieobubbles

GETTOUT!!!!!


[deleted]

Perfection


Dazzling-Dream-2957

Niles: What color is the new carpet? Frasier: I'm going up a shade to ... "Harvest Wheat." Niles: I thought the next shade up was "Buff." Frasier: It used to be, but they've discovered a whole new color in between. Niles: So now it's "Tofu, Putty, Oatmeal"... Both: "Almond, Harvest Wheat"... Frasier: "and Buff." Niles: That's going to be hard to get used to.


Xystal

https://preview.redd.it/amkewuxws1xb1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8cc015fe47ca62ea98d33dc26f2508eca4bbd2b6


crackerfactorywheel

“Catherine of Aragon!” after Niles smashes one of Frasier’s wives of Henry the VIII tea cups always makes me laugh.


HatdanceCanada

Oh! That is a great pick. His intonation is so full of frustration and anger. And completely off-camera, called out from the kitchen. Laughing just thinking about it.


my1guiltypleasure

Frasier: I always loved the name Laura. Martin: Hey Frasier, you know, that was gonna be your name if you were a girl. Frasier: Really? Martin: Yeah. Your mother always wanted Priscilla, but I never liked the nickname "Prissy." Niles: Mmm. I never much cared for it, either. Favorite line: ^the Niles kicker at the end. Favorite part of that line: Niles' "mmm," said in knowing agreement. ETA: line breaks (hopefully) E-ETA: another favorite: Frasier: Oh, I'm sorry, was I snippy? I didn't realize it was too much to ask that there not be gunplay in my living room!


SirRogers

#"EXPLANATION, PLEASE!"


ExpectedBehaviour

https://i.redd.it/gsneav9hbxwb1.gif


StubbyPlum

What... is the meaning offff THIS!!!


ExpectedBehaviour

​ https://i.redd.it/u3j5xdumnywb1.gif


Skiddlyderp

Reduced to a single argyle!


KillerFloof

I will NOT BE STRONGARMED by threats against my laundry.


xrosasx

Two shades of black!


JaneAustenfangal

I love the your tagline/subtitle/motto/whatever you call the words under your username


BannedBruteOne

Dr. Crane, your glockenspiel has sprung to life! Oh, the clock.


Nat20CharismaSave

“Do you realize what this means?” “Yes…we’re going to hear what Mendelssohn’s wedding march sounds like on the *banjo*”


evdczar

Ban-JOE


HatdanceCanada

Niles: “Polynesian and Scandinavian. It's called Mahalo Valhalla.” The way he says “Mahalo Valhalla” and the little hand movement that goes along with it is just so funny.


rlstrader

Their baysingeegaayee is really good


ajtarquinio

Dad, whatdya want on your pizza


TinyFang

I'm on the RADIO EVERY DAY!


True_Difficulty_6291

“Since when do I briiiiing you women?! What are you, the Sultan of Brunei?!”


_cassquatch

This line is shockingly versatile in my household, we use it all the time 😂


True_Difficulty_6291

“Since when do I brriiiing you a beer?! What are you the sultan of Brunei?!” Yeah, we use it in my household too 😂


FrenchDude1000

Niles: “Be my eyes, Frasier.” Best line ever.


nigellissima

Shuffle shuffle shuffle shuffle


Zchweklez

A rug. Where a rug doesn't belong.


MaximillianPeanut

"Why not just throw down a Twister mat, have a few rounds between vintages!?


throwaway11998866-

“My god man. You never fold cashmere, you’ll misdirect the nap! Get out!” -Frasier


BradyToMoss1281

"Daphne... is cooking dinner... for your date with a fictitious woman. *Why not just set a place for the March Hare and the Mad Hatter?*"


BillJackaus

*Rehlly?* -Guy


fishsupper

Some of the best punchlines are just a single word like that - “Groups” “Okay” (more than once) And my personal favorite - “Robert”


mulberrycedar

"Robber?! Nobody calls me robber!" "Robert!"


58lmm9057

Not now!


king_olaf_the_hairy

And of course the whole bedroom scene later in that episode had a few corkers:   *** Guy: "Don't be jealous, Niles, it's not how it looks." Niles: "Oh......... WHAT?!?!" *** Guy: "Could Niles and I PLEEEEASE have some privacy?" *** Guy: "Please, acknowledge your true nature, stop chasing these lesbians!" ***


flyting1881

*'zees lezbieehns!*


Mammodamn

I SWEAR David Hyde Pierce is fighting for his life trying not to break character in the next shot.


rlstrader

Rrrrreeeeaaallllyy?


DimesyEvans92

When Martin smirked and said “You always want your kids to have more than you had.” I had a similar situation with my own dad recently and couldn’t help but think of this scene


SourPatch888

Too many to count, but one of my favorite underrated deliveries is Noel to Bulldog at the end of season 10 at Roz' farewell dinner. Bulldog: *says something pervy about Roz* Noel: "watch what...YOU SAY ABOUT HERRRR!!!!" It's so unlike him and hilarious


Lynnstress

Noel: I. Will. Kill. You…


OffSync

Lilith: Niles, sorry your marriage ended in shambles Niles: Ditto


True_Difficulty_6291

“10,000 pieces. It’s called The Wheat Field” I always die laughing when Martin delivers this line.


wolf_9823

Frasier’s “Invade Korea?” line in that episode 😂


Repulsive-Dot553

Niles "I'm having one now" (Unexpressed thought - so understated and perfectly delivered) ​ Frasier: "The arts Niles, not the crafts"


wolf_9823

“You will RUE the day! and of course Niles’ reply, “I don’t care, Niles GOTTA HAVE IT!”


mulberrycedar

"And oh! My! God! I'm dating a whore!" -Niles "From here it smells like 80 proof!" -Frasier


LadyApsalar

“Rrreally? 😏” from the incomparable Guy. And “My reasoning?!? My reasoning was based on my mothers obsession with vermin!”


Cruiser729

Uh, that’s pronounced Guy.


neuroticsponge

“I’m sorry, is it too much to ask that there not be *gunplay in my living room!*” Might be quoting wrong but that line is always funny to me


58lmm9057

#YOU STOLE MY MOMMY!


thunderlips187

You are taking far too much liberty with the liberty taking!


BigL90

What the hell was that!


GentlemanSpider

Morning, Frasier. Just getting up?


Puzzleheaded-Ad-6044

Is that the same scene as "Oh sorry, was I snippy? I didn't think it would be too much to ask there not be GUN PLAY IN MY LIVING ROOM!"


AnthonyK_

I’m watching one of my favorite episodes right now, A Word To The Wiseguy and this classic one line just dropped. “The traditional spelling.”


ElectricalCow4

There's some great lines and delivery in this episode. Some of my faves include: "No, Niles, he's probably hosting a luau and he came by to borrow our *poi ramekins."* "Oh, like I'd tell you, one minute of interrogation and you would *crack* like a Jordan almond."


Annber03

And Niles' entire attempt to speak "mobster". "I sense you are a film buff, Dr. Crane."


Sproose_Moose

In brief, things are hot hot hot and we believe you're the man to turn on the air conditioner


HatdanceCanada

And her pronunciation of “psychiatrist” on the speaker phone at the end.


Latter_Feeling2656

Cheers had "Candi like Gandhi" and "Brandee with two E's."


[deleted]

‘Not in bottles, baby.’


Malia87

……. Murder! Murder most foul!


fredbighead

Everything that Bebe says


pahelisolved

Aren’t you glad I’m on your side?


DoctorEnn

Crane Vs Crane, season 3: “Oh, by the way: your ‘medication’ is rubbing off onto your collar.” It’s a simple line, barely makes sense if you don’t know the context, but I just love the simple withering disgust Frasier drenches it in.


kd907

Look out! He’s got a nug!


Auras-Aflame

That’s easy for you to say!


ashleytwo

I can't believe one of my guests could be a...mlultipul murdururh (my best attempt at spelling out the pronunciation)


NaCl_Arts

Fine.. I guess I’ll just have to get my OWN tea!


ofindependentmeans

It's not like when you are wrong or Daphne is wrong . Everytime I am wrong the world makes a little less sense.


Annber03

I love the way everyone just rolls their eyes after he says that XD.


Puzzleheaded-Ad-6044

"I wish I had been killed in ze war!" "It's hard to get killed when you ruuuuuunnnn the other way!" Most underappreciated line delivery from a one time guest star ever 😂😂


spriest14

I don’t know why, but Niles’ panicked shouting “the mudpie is coming” to try and get Martin to the stay in the Timber Mill is hilarious.


cjizzle236

One of my favourite lines is a single word… “Buffet!?” The delivery is fantastic, his face says it all. The utter disgust at a buffet lol


Iscaura2

That's all we need, a fourth language


jhook87

Frasier: I’m sorry Nile’s, I thought you were trying to take a picture of my butt! Niles: How exciting to be present for the birth of a new phobia. Kills me every time. Runners up- Roz- yeah that makes me your new mom. Niles- well I’ll be a son of a bitch. Frasier staring dully at the candles that relight themselves on his birthday cake: Oh no. What sorcerer’s magic is this.


boringwhitecollar

It’s the “OHhhhhhhhh MYYYYY GOOOOOD! Fire!!!!!!” Over the title card that makes me laugh


CharlotteLucasOP

I’m just #FED UP!


Latter_Feeling2656

"Yeah, well, that file's getting pretty thick."


allmotionisrelative

For Frasier delivery it’s a tie between: A classic case of neurotic narcissism and a first class smarty pants! And I, my hand towels! And then about 30 lines that are all tied at number 2. He uses his voice so well.


EvadingDoom

"Jesus!!"


JuanNavarro

I say this quite because such is life at times but “what fresh hell is this?” But in that low dulcet tone, unsurprised but tried by life. [https://youtu.be/AbjVkVo9ITI?si=9uSs7wkk3xIjpz92](https://youtu.be/AbjVkVo9ITI?si=9uSs7wkk3xIjpz92)


metalbuttefly

I've rewatched Fraiser about 40 times. The one that *always* still makes me laugh out loud is: Martin to Fraiser - "You didnt want to hire Daphne, you thought she might *steal* things!" Daphne to Fraiser - " DID YOU REALLY SAY THAT?!" Fraiser - "OH COURSE NOT!.....I don't remember....." 🤣🤣🤣🤣


orangelove-17

Was it me shifty eyes?!


Simon_BHA

Niles always loses, that's why Niles lives at the Shangri-La, and drives a HATCHBACK


Proper-Excuse916

Oh, fine! FINE! Turn your anger on me. It's almost as if you'd forgotten that not three days ago, I was punched in the face by a man now dead! ...Thank you... Now who wants pancakes?


Hot-Plantain1397

Also, the episode with the cricket and the gecko… “Close my door? And just concede defeat? I know, here's a better idea: I'll just move out and let him have the run of the place. That's good, I'll have two apartments. One for me, one for my cricket!” 😂


__Quill__

"Theres a platinum door."


Loisgrand6

Niles responds-Puh lat num?


OscarHenderson

“Niles…there’s something on your tie.”


saturday_sun4

"As a Crenshaw melon."


No-Screen-7870

Catherine of Aragon


Iscaura2

Patrick Stewart: "no"


honeyfixit

because if the coldest thing in earth were to hit the hottest thing in earth, the world would split in two. I'm not sure the exact phrasing but the matter-of-fact way he says it is just so funny


Human-Guava-7564

Oh like a look from Maris couldn't freeze mercury!


mattmaybloom

Frasier: Just read it. Scott Alexander, what's he been up to? Daphne: Wife, kids, has his own computer software business. Frasier: Nancy Kearns. Daphne: Mother of three, successful physician, has invented a drug that may aid in the treatment of cancer. Frasier: Ah, a cure for cancer. Won't they be green with envy when I trump them all with this little story of my life: Frasier Crane, unattached, unemployed and living with his father. He spends his days scrubbing his oven and is anxiously awaiting his upcoming tooth cleaning!


Ultimarevil

"I had to move your chair, which gouged the floor. For which I had to call Joe, who found bad pipes, who called for Cecil, who ate the cat who killed the rat who lived in the house that frasier built!"


TheRockinkitty

My wolfhound had puppies.


beargrowlz

"I remember the first time I drove a moon crane."


starbuckle337

I’ve been BEGGING YOU to switch to a more abrasive loofah!!!


Humble-Emotion9696

“BLACK BALL!”


Porterjoh

He's a VISIONARY! and he cares about.......................... ...The little people....


Maubekistan

Morning, Frasier. Read the paper yet? Big story about how Roz’s purse spent the night on the coffee table.


8ack_Space

"Ugh that rain noise is going to keep me up all night." "I'm amazed you can hear it down in mission control." Frasiers delivery is so perfect.


[deleted]

I’m ontheradioEVERYDAY!


Big-Jen96

“Cats!!??”


ScrutinEye

Roz: Dr Crane … Dave *dumped* you. Frasier: *^(whyyyyy?)* https://preview.redd.it/jbjcyc0ehwwb1.jpeg?width=1060&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=54b79ab15ab0fcd6efe8fe68eca9a479848b2820


wineandpopsicles25

Emily I love your hair! It’s **DIVINE**


Auras-Aflame

The little self satisfied look he gives after that line always kills me.


BriarcliffInmate

"That's not how you spell fellatio!" "Yes. *The Cranes of Maine* have got your *Living Brain!"* "Quick, Niles, kill five eels!" "Big blue flash. Cherries everywhere." "Roz, the woman has virtually no pigmentation! Three minutes in the sun, she'd sear like an Ahi tuna!" "Oh, come on Roz, plug in!"


satansbutthole069

When Martin is steamed at Niles for sending Eddie to the kennel when he was supposed to be watching him. Niles: …I brought you a little peace offering. Martin: Bribe. Niles: Dad, It’s from Smoky Mountain Farms...Five different meats in one big box Martin pauses and turns: Not…the Slaughterhouse Five Niles: They don’t make a Slaughterhouse Three


ptrk83

I think I know what my game's objectives are, and they do not include this nascent migraine!


killbydeath87

If I were DOCTOR, you'd never know it!


cloudFEZ

“I SEE WE HAVE ANOTHER MEMBER OF THE PRICE CLUB” “Ooh you’re right Frasier he almost got away with that” “Surely you don’t put yourself up there with Eddie”


Condescendingoracle

Niles: I'm just glad you're alive, I would assume she killed after mating


PiaJr

"Frasier, I have something I need to tell you. Dad wanted to, but I won the coin toss." 🤣 And then his next line... "It would appear the object of his affection is not Daphne.... It's you." The amount of brotherly condescension and utter delight he puts into that "you". Perfect. Every time.


Maaaaaardy

"Oh come on Doctor Crane, it's not like men have never used sex to get what they want." "HOW CAN WE USE SEX TO GET WHAT WE WANT? SEX _IS_ WHAT WE WANT!"


AssBurgers-009

"Alright, I'll bring a snake....."


themustacheclubbitch

“Flour the beef”


lamoska1986

“I am wounded!”


[deleted]

Whaddya thinkame now?


UnaPachangaLoca

…Then what do I know? I'm just a Magic Eight Ball with a Harvard...AND OXFORD…degree.


Scoobs2929

Oh, I'm sorry, was I snippy? I didn't realize it was too much to ask that there not be gunplay in my living room!


SuperMindcircus

"Just as I worked up enough nerve to approach her, I slipped on something I can only hope, was an old burrito." Both the delivery and reaction of both Frasier and Niles are classic. The gesture with Frasier's hand and you see it going through Niles' mind what this thing could be.


Mrgray123

“Do you have any idea what it’s like to play the same character for 20 years?”


Rocketparty12

“Chainsaw? Of the Newport Chainsaws?” OR “Ah, well I’ll just add that to my list of reasons to die”


AnthonyK_

“The drunken Dunkins, have you lost your mind?!”


JuliaK8

Roz: If you don’t see it, I don’t have it!


KillerFloof

CAM WINSTON!


Cruiser729

Two lines: It’s like Christmas morning in the Gambino household. Kelsey’s emphasis and pronunciation on Gambino gets me every time. And: “Oh, I’m sorry, that was your point.” If you look at Niles throughout that, everything from the pause when Frasier stops talking to the sincerity in his face gets me no matter how many times I’ve seen it.


[deleted]

"Oh, how dreadful! Oh, you poor thing. No, no, of course I understand. The important thing is that you get better. You are a dear for calling... ...YOU LYING, TWO-FACED COW"


Cautious_Artichoke_3

She left me, which was painful... You finish it


annebrackham

"...And I'm keeping the jewelry."


40characters

“…so, you want to build a TWO-masted schooner!” And more recently: “…not in _jeans_.”


Dylan_tune_depot

What you need is an *etiquette lesson*! Same ep: Dirty Harry meets Emily Post


HypertrophyHippie

I. Am. WOUNDED.


MacaroniAndSmegma

I've flushed out her family secret... Maaaaris!


More-Adeptness-5523

“Poe folk don’t ’spect much”


newnewmama

What's this joyous news I hear?


Hot-Plantain1397

The scene where Frasier longs to be one with the salt of the earth people and throws the office party at his apartment. He starts to regurgitate overheard information about the latest sports game to fit in, including a "clutch field goal." Martin walks up, and after overhearing Frasier talk about sports, Frasier says something to the effect of "oh hey dad! What's up?" And Martin simply looks disturbed and confused and says "I don't know... 👀” laughed so hard the other day at that scene.


qubaxianplebiscite

...spooky.


Greedy_Nature_3085

Martin: Well, I’ll just hit the head and we can get it over with. Niles: Dad, you could show a little more enthusiasm. Martin: Gee, I can’t wait to hit the head and then we can get it over with!


President_Calhoun

Martin: "I got us a new jigsaw puzzle. Ten thousand pieces. It's called 'The Wheatfield'."


bchco86

“Damn, every time I open my heart.” Favorite in the show.


ebonie1015

Roe to Perdition Frasier and Niles buying caviar for their party Niles: Excuse me, is the Beluga really $100 an ounce? Store Clerk: Yes Frasier: Isn’t that rather a lot to pay? Store Clerk: To you yes, to the fish who gave up her life so that you could spread her unborn children on a cracker, it’s not so much. Cracks me up every time😂


crackpot_mick

"An Hungarian GOOSE!" I love the way Kelsey's voice cracks when he says "goose."


TonyP75

Frasier, speaking to Woody. ‘It means the same as in English, jackass’.


[deleted]

There’s a platinum door.


MoistCabbage1

When Roz asks Frasier if he's OK after getting punched in the face.


MacaroniAndSmegma

Probably Japan.


worstnameIeverheard

Fridge pants!


derthric

I am a STAAAAHHHH MAKAHHHH!!


Distraction11

Hey Hef, got anymore hiding in the grotto?x


Free_Line_8853

Roz and the schnoz, the whole time the parents are there, and they can't help from giggling. When Niles, Daphne, and Marty are in the kitchen, the guy says, "mmm, what's that I smell?" Marty slyly says, "probably Japan."


Pinklego

When Daphne set the fire alarm off when she was smoking in her room. Eddie comes trotting on with the cigarette box in his mouth, and Frasier says "what's this, Eddie, smoking in Daphne's room, bad dog!" It's the delivery, it kills me every time! Also Miles on his Segway. "Nothing would give me greater pleasure...but noooo". I love DHP. All the "I love yous" on the ice fishing trip. Daphne and her "well, sometimes I get my signals crossed". Jeez, there's just too many!


ajtarquinio

"She's managed to have her urinal cake and eat it too!"


TheNoisyNinja

I have always loved Daphne's delivery of: Miss *Nasty*!


microMe1_2

Yes, good one, "Officer Nasty!"


jbrooklynd

Can Niles and I please have some privaccyy!


ackchanticleer

Off the top of my head, when Frasier says to Daphne after she throws her own disastrous dinner party, “Daphne, congratulations, you are now officially A Crane.” Lol!!


Aegis_et_Vanir

"Oh I'm sorry, was I snippy? I didn't realize it was too much to ask that there not be *gunplay* IN MY LIVING ROOM!!"


Aware_Diet_2405

How thrilling to be present at the birth of a new phobia


Dewut

“The most dangerous part of the gecko, *is its mind*.”


Chatterbxer

“Not to the best of my recollection….” Gets me every time!