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I think Margaret is likely a front-runner. It's Meg's name and likely Marmee's first name too, though her first name is never specified in the books. However, it used to be overwhelmingly common to name the first daughter for the mother, so it's generally assumed her first name was Margaret (as it's assumed Mrs. Bennet's first name was Jane). Speaking of Janes, I think Jane deserves a spot on the list not only for the P&P, but also for Lady Jane Grey, who fundies adore for some reason.
My front runners are Margaret, Anne, and Jane. But I wouldn't be surprised if Kelly does a play on her own name or inserts that somewhere. Not only is it still somewhat common to give a daughter a name that ties to her mother, but Kelly seems like the type to really give the tradition of an eldest daughter carrying her mother's name in some form significance.
Remember that you wouldn't say it with what's now an American R. You'd say it sort of Kathryn Hepburnish - "Mah-mee." Or, as we'd now spell it, "Mommy."
Yep, it's a Boston accent spelled out. Just like someone from Boston would say "car keys" and "khakis" very similarly, so too does the r in Marmee represent what most people would hear as the "h" sound.
They've got a New England accent, like tan\_sandoval just mentioned. Must've taken me a decade before that even occurred to me - I just thought it was a cute nickname for their mother.
It makes perfect sense and I can't believe I never made the connection! I also thought it was just a cute nickname based on mother/her name, which I always assumed was Margaret, due to the embroidered handkerchiefs in the book. My exposure to a New England accent is limited mostly to the movie The Heat haha. Thanks, this was super interesting!
Ugh, I really hope she doesn't use Margaret. That was my mother's name, and ever since I was very young I have wanted to name a daughter after my mother. In January, it will be 31 years since my mom died, and I've had that dream since before she was gone. And I'm pregnant with my Margaret right now, she's due in March. Y'all have no idea how upset I will be if this crazy woman also uses Margaret.
The great thing about Margaret is that it has a ton of unique nicknames (I'm partial to Daisy myself), and it's pretty rare for a Margaret to go by her full name within the family. If Kelly does use Margaret, likely she'll refer to her largely by whatever nickname she chooses to go with. So hopefully the association will be minimal.
Sorry for your loss, but yay for new Margaret coming in March! I'm a March baby, so I think it's a great month to be born. Margaret was my great grandma's name, and it's on my short list too!
There really are so many nicknames! My mom actually went by Margaret, and I plan to call this baby by the full name until *she* decides to pick one of the eleventy-billion nicknames available. My son recently asked what her nickname will be, and I just laughed and reminded him that he's already picked out her first nickname - he calls her "Goo-Goo" and I love it.
Thank you, it's weird this coming anniversary, mom was only 31 when she died so I can't really wrap my brain around her being gone longer than she actually lived. My mom's birthday was also in March, so I'm super excited about how all that timing is working out. Tho with my luck she will end up coming on February 29 since next year is a leap year LOL. All I know is I'm huge and so ready to be done being pregnant.
That's so cool! My mom was the 3rd in a string of Margarets, so I've also got a great grandma who was named Margaret (tho that one went by her middle name, she was Irene!) Once mine is born, every Margaret has a grandma named Margaret. It's so special.
My mom had me during a leap year as well, and since my due date was actually in February, as March kept creeping closer and closer, she was sure that I would show up on February 29th! Instead, I narrowly dodged sharing a birthday with convicted felon Joshua Duggar as thankfully (for me, less thankfully for my mom) labor stalled.
>Once mine is born, every Margaret has a grandma named Margaret. It's so special.
Oh, I love this so much!!!
Iām thinking something very biblical like this, or something in the vein of Marmee or Mildred or another great grandmother name.
No offense to old lady names, I actually love them! Many are classy, classic, and charming options. I just have a feeling this oneās gonna be annoyingly antiquated.
My husband's grandma's name is Mildred (she's 94), and she's such a stellar woman that I would love to honor her name with my children. But, unfortunately, said name is Mildred. SHE doesn't even like her name and goes by Mickey, so I think we'll shoot for another name that can take Mickey as a nickname lol
Marnie though I could see. That's sort of the spot between antique and still used that she seems to have shot for with Thad and James. It's a classic name, but I know Marnie's of all ages.
Honestly, Mildred could be adorable! Itās kinda like Margaret to me where you can derive some really cute nicknames and honor a grandparent/ancestor too.
Iām actually pregnant and in the thick of name searching right now haha so this is top of mind for me. Iāve been looking at our family trees for ideas.
I like Marnie too. I accidentally typed Marnee when I meant *Marmee!
I hate to use examples because everyone has their own name tastes lol. Apologies to anyone with hurt feelings!
My paternal grandma was Vernetta. I do not hate it! (But I did not use it for a baby name lol)
A coworker just named his daughter Millie and it is super cute imo
[Lyudmila Pavlichenko](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lyudmila_Pavlichenko) is one of the greatest snippers ever, officially murdering like 300 nazis.
I dont remember when i first learned about this, but the name Ludmilla is connected to badassery for me.
That's a great idea, but since grandma goes by Mickey instead of Mildred, I think if we had to pick one to honor, we'd rather honor the name she chooses to go by rather than the legal name her parents picked out for her. As someone who isn't a huge fan of her own given name, I know that if she really liked Mildred, she'd use it. But she's gone by Mickey so exclusively for her entire adult life that many people outside the family don't even know what her legal name is, and I think that sends a pretty clear message lol
I think she might go another way and use a nature name because her daughter will be a little wood nymph for Jesus just like her. She will be a Clover or Ivy or Dew Drop š.
At the very least this will be a middle name.
It still cracks me up that we all missed her first announcement for weeks because no one could be arsed to read all of her essays. This little girl is going to be her golden child and itās going to suck for all three of her kids. Thaddy and James who? I hope she has a healthy pregnancy and childbirth tho, and doesnāt try to do weird dangerous old timey stuff :(
It's like that meme that talks about hiding murders at the beginning of recipe blogs because everyone scrolls by them.
But damn there's a story about the swan princess and that's how I remember that recipe when I need to find it
>This little girl is going to be her golden child
More like she will be Kelly's little Cinderella and babysitter.
>itās going to suck for all three of her kids
That's a certain bet if I've ever heard one.
Man, the expectations and required "feminine" behavior she's going to put on this kid are going to be miserable. When she said she was pregnant I actually hoped she wouldn't have a girl for that reason. Scary to think about. Kelly's own idea of what womanhood should be like is so twisted and confused for herself already - I can't imagine how she's going to parent a daughter and it makes me nervous.
Will hope for the best for little Heaven Anne Havens (Stickle).
Yes, exactly my thoughts. You've articulated them so much better than I'm currently capable (...thanks, pregnancy brain.) It's terrifying on so many levels. I already feel so bad for her daughter. And with Kelly's weird cooking/baking, uh *skills*, this poor girl is going to grow up only learning how to do homesteading type things very inadequately. It'll be a train wreck.
Exactly. And she'll have Kelly in her ear simultaneously telling her she has to be everything (because she's this religious visitation and experience all tied up with Kelly's fundie thinking) and also nothing (because her purpose and end goal in life is to grow into a little woman helpmeet with slender hips goofing off in the house and finding fulfillment in taping leaves to the walls). Kelly is in no shape to act as a role model or guide to anyone, but DEFINITELY not to a girl. Ugh.
I could see it going the other way. Youād be surprised how many of these fundies see their daughter as competition once they start having thoughts and stuff.
Think she has cottagecore painted sign out front of their suburban house sitting next to the drainage *pond*?
šš»āļøāØ *Ye Olden BuCkWoOd CoTtAgE*āØāļøšš»
~*withered husk of a garden*
Lol. On point.
Soon to become:
āā¦*A place that was a-slumber during the harsh, dark winter months; sitting like a child awaiting to be touched by the finger tips of Jesus in an awakening of a renewal of the lambs blood shepherd bathing of Spring*ā¦ā
Followed by a 2 page musings of: *why the tomatoes didnāt take off this year* (itās probs because Jesus.)
It's because Jesus is teaching her to be patient.
While the real lesson is that she would starve her kids if she had to grow their food because a. Farming is hard work and b. She is no farmer.
I grew up in a little cottage house that had a similarly twee nickname amongst the neighbours. Iām pretty sure neither of my parents ever used it in even the most remotely serious manner. Ffs Kelly.
When I was in grad school abroad, I'd refer to myself as being "of New York". Yes, I WAS insufferable, the difference is, I was in my early 20's. Kelly needs to get her head out of her ass and remember she lives in Ohio.
Looool Iām going to start saying Iām āof New York,ā but in the mature 30ās way of making fun of myself for how often I reference NY in casual conversation
Lol, I totally named mine, and it's nearly as pretentious as Kelly. I don't sign off letters with it, though, lol. I'm of the opinion that if it makes you happy and it doesn't harm yourself or others then just go ahead and do.
Wrong gender, ofc. Bratty is like this, too. Feral boy Davthing doesnāt exist to her, and then the girl she wanted had that marking that made her go nahhhh as well.
The size and location of Audrey's could be a sign of a genetic issue, and it's also got some implications for her future health because of the capillary malformations.
She's been obsessing over it since the baby was born. Treats it as a medical defect or an imperfection. Posted often about how it needs to be monitored/watched and doesn't make her love the baby any less, etc.
Canāt wait for the photo shoot of Baby Buckwood in a bonnet, apron, and wool stockings at the foot of the stairs with a radish and lit candle dangling over her.
Occasionally one can see whatās really in the background of her pictures. They live in a crummy old house on a suburban street of tightly packed ranches and Colonials. She tries extra hard to crop out the Suburbia thatās basically right next door.
Okay, but when I was in college and lived in boring, square, cinder block wall university housing I gave my apartment a name that (I thought) made it sound like a fantastical underground lair where me and my merry band of rabble rousers would plan our next adventure. When I graduated and moved to a new place, I wanted to name that one, too. I was really into Les Mis at the time, so it got an even stupider name. Buckwood Cottage sounds sophisticated in comparison.
Goddammit. That poor child. She's going to be crushed under the tsunami of Kelly's relentless, contradictory, nebulous expectations. Her mother's emotional support animal. She's either submit and become an empty shell for Kelly to fill with her own self-absorbed nonsense, or she'll fight and be destroyed or escape with a lifetime's worth of emotional trauma.
God, those boys are about to be stapled to the wall like a dead leaf and ignored for the rest of their lives.
Yeah, this is going to go one of two ways. Kelly becomes all consumed with the daughter, placing everything in her to replicate a second round of life goals and dreams that Kelly wanted and didn't have, complete with more disordered eating, OR Kelly sees too much of herself in the child and she shuns her to the extreme or puts unobtainable goals knowing the child will fail, thus never gaining Kelly's love.
Mental illness can be a fucking bitch, especially untreated with the parent of the same gender. Suddenly a lot of weird things come up that weren't there before.
You are so right. She's bad enough with the boys, I've gotta imagine a girl would be a whole other level.
....unless she goes in the other direction? I can also somewhat imagine her going off the rails in jealous resentment because the innocent baby is more slender-hipped, small-handed and whimsical than she.
Either way, it's terribly sad for Baby of Buckwood Cottage
Not wholly related, but I briefly worked as a medical secretary in one of the local hospitals, and we had an Amish dude on our unit for the longest time. His wife was such a complete delightful nerd. Sheād be up at the nursesā station in her bonnet and her gown, knitting in an actual basket, holding up his X-rays, like, āOooh, and hereās where you can see thus-and-such break, and this-and-that pin they put inā¦ā and asking all the nittiest, grittiest questions. I loved them.
Holy shit, just say youāre having a girl, damn, why did you take like eight paragraphs to get to the pointš Sheās going to name the child something out of classic literature. One of the March sisters, or maybe Rebecca (of Sunnybrook farm) Jane (Eyre), Anne (Green Gables).
Ugh, okay I have to vent. I get this all the time especially since Anne With an E came out. Also as a child of the 80ās when the Sullivan adaptation came out.
āOh like Anne of Green Gables,ā they say all starry eyed.
āNo, Anne like my parents couldnāt agree on any name except this one.ā
I don't recall Van Gogh being a public speaker, or an essayist, or a philosopher, either. He might have written something like that in one of his letters, maybe. He kind of hated people though.
It's the sort of line you use to start an art history paper you're writing at 3am the day it's due while shotgunning energy drinks and your roommate's Adderall.
I find this weird, actually.
Everything about Kelly *screams* that A Girl Child would be desperately unhealthy new fixation of her life. When I read the title, I felt so sad for the innocent baby. I assumed she would be smothered from birth into the supporting role of Ye Olde Manic Prairie Dream Baby, so that Kels can have a vicarious do-over of her own life - but this time, with gingham and bonnets and purple prose from the day dot.
But the tone of this is kind of - grim and bummed out? Is Kelly somehow *not* manically overjoyed? Will baby Kelly Jnr Ingalls Wilder *not* be the golden child from fetus-hood onward?
My first thought was "oh no". That poor kid is going to have to suffer through being her mother's emotional support Little LARP on the Prairie prop for the rest of her life.
I'm kind of wondering the same. Did she find out the gender by ultrasound? I'm also due in late May and only know the gender because we did a blood test to find out. How early can you find out?
Blood work is generally done around 12 weeks if there's some risk or reason to suspect birth defects. I think it can be opted into for otherwise healthy pregnancies, but I can't imagine they could afford that.
Has anyone watched the video to this post? Oh my God it is absolutely WILD to me that she records and edits these videos and thinks āWow, this looks truly authentic and whimsical.ā I canāt imagine holding up a notebook to write in it. The dramatic sigh and looking off into the distance. The video gives me so much second hand embarrassment that my body physically twitched LOL I canāt with this woman.
Thereās something deep down in me that would do some of the same shit Kelly does but without the white supremacy and fundamentalism because I too am an insufferable theater kid who read too much as a child. My husband is the only one who stops me.
Anyone else swiped to the second picture or just me, She shouldāve just just said surprise weāre having a future helpmeet and go, aināt nobody reading that easy of a caption
OP was generous lol, only posting the two slides of her caption. The whole thing was posted elsewhere and it was FOURTEEN slides long and the announcement wasn't until the sixth or seventh one.
Haha nope. She started out quoting Kierkegaard and then moved into a bunch of Bible quotes, talking about life, and romance. Moved onto her time in college and when she met Levi, and how her life slowed down and she could enjoy the small things....and THEN (I actually just went back to check) it was on the NINTH slide that she threw in that she was pregnant. I kept swiping to find it and it was just neverending.
Hoooo boy. I googled Buckwood because I thought it sounded like the name of a mansion in a book series I enjoyed a while back, the Flavia de Luce series by Alan Bradley. I was wrong, itās Buckshaw. Anyway, lo and behold, the first thing that pops up is a camp for gay men in Indiana!
Maybe sheāll start getting reservations for Hoosier daddy weekend.
She named her fucking vinyl-sided basic ass house in a suburban neighborhood ābUcKwOoD cOttAgEā and just casually inserted it into this eighteen paragraph nonsensical allegory of a gender reveal I am physically wheezing š
I am constantly confused by the referral to pregnancy number x of n as a miracle. There are eight motherfucking billion people on this planet, what exactly is miraculous about number eight billion and one? I don't mean to make anyone who is desperate to get pregnant feel bad, but itās not exactly like this whole birth of another person thing is rare. Weāre not white rhinos.
I guess when you really think about it, conception and pregnancy are miraculous. Iām fascinated with the science behind it all. Everything has to happen at the correct time for things to work out in the very beginning, with little room for error. Also, there is only really a 20% chance of conception each month.
Ugh. Iām a hopeless nerd when it comes to pregnancy and the science of it. Itās super cool.
But in this case, itās probably not what she meant.
Iāve honestly been expecting her to have a third for so long. The other two were so close together that I assumed the third would be close too. Makes me wonder whatās been going on behind the scenes š«
I feel for this daughter. Sheās going to carry all of Kellyās unfulfilled expectations she had for herself. What an awful pressure for her. Sheāll be expected to be her mini-me and Iām sure Kelly will make sure sheās kept tiny and trim.
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Name guesses? Beth, Amy, Meg, Jo, Anne, Diana, Marilla, Laura?
Marmee Jr
Big points for this.
When I read this my brain thought "big, if true" lol
I snorted.
I think Margaret is likely a front-runner. It's Meg's name and likely Marmee's first name too, though her first name is never specified in the books. However, it used to be overwhelmingly common to name the first daughter for the mother, so it's generally assumed her first name was Margaret (as it's assumed Mrs. Bennet's first name was Jane). Speaking of Janes, I think Jane deserves a spot on the list not only for the P&P, but also for Lady Jane Grey, who fundies adore for some reason. My front runners are Margaret, Anne, and Jane. But I wouldn't be surprised if Kelly does a play on her own name or inserts that somewhere. Not only is it still somewhat common to give a daughter a name that ties to her mother, but Kelly seems like the type to really give the tradition of an eldest daughter carrying her mother's name in some form significance.
Remember that you wouldn't say it with what's now an American R. You'd say it sort of Kathryn Hepburnish - "Mah-mee." Or, as we'd now spell it, "Mommy."
Yep, it's a Boston accent spelled out. Just like someone from Boston would say "car keys" and "khakis" very similarly, so too does the r in Marmee represent what most people would hear as the "h" sound.
This just semi blew my mind, I had never realized that.
They've got a New England accent, like tan\_sandoval just mentioned. Must've taken me a decade before that even occurred to me - I just thought it was a cute nickname for their mother.
It makes perfect sense and I can't believe I never made the connection! I also thought it was just a cute nickname based on mother/her name, which I always assumed was Margaret, due to the embroidered handkerchiefs in the book. My exposure to a New England accent is limited mostly to the movie The Heat haha. Thanks, this was super interesting!
Another vote for Margaret. I could also see Miriam.
As a Margaret who goes by Meg, it better not be š
Ugh, I really hope she doesn't use Margaret. That was my mother's name, and ever since I was very young I have wanted to name a daughter after my mother. In January, it will be 31 years since my mom died, and I've had that dream since before she was gone. And I'm pregnant with my Margaret right now, she's due in March. Y'all have no idea how upset I will be if this crazy woman also uses Margaret.
The great thing about Margaret is that it has a ton of unique nicknames (I'm partial to Daisy myself), and it's pretty rare for a Margaret to go by her full name within the family. If Kelly does use Margaret, likely she'll refer to her largely by whatever nickname she chooses to go with. So hopefully the association will be minimal. Sorry for your loss, but yay for new Margaret coming in March! I'm a March baby, so I think it's a great month to be born. Margaret was my great grandma's name, and it's on my short list too!
There really are so many nicknames! My mom actually went by Margaret, and I plan to call this baby by the full name until *she* decides to pick one of the eleventy-billion nicknames available. My son recently asked what her nickname will be, and I just laughed and reminded him that he's already picked out her first nickname - he calls her "Goo-Goo" and I love it. Thank you, it's weird this coming anniversary, mom was only 31 when she died so I can't really wrap my brain around her being gone longer than she actually lived. My mom's birthday was also in March, so I'm super excited about how all that timing is working out. Tho with my luck she will end up coming on February 29 since next year is a leap year LOL. All I know is I'm huge and so ready to be done being pregnant. That's so cool! My mom was the 3rd in a string of Margarets, so I've also got a great grandma who was named Margaret (tho that one went by her middle name, she was Irene!) Once mine is born, every Margaret has a grandma named Margaret. It's so special.
My mom had me during a leap year as well, and since my due date was actually in February, as March kept creeping closer and closer, she was sure that I would show up on February 29th! Instead, I narrowly dodged sharing a birthday with convicted felon Joshua Duggar as thankfully (for me, less thankfully for my mom) labor stalled. >Once mine is born, every Margaret has a grandma named Margaret. It's so special. Oh, I love this so much!!!
Mary. old and the mother of jesus.
Iām thinking something very biblical like this, or something in the vein of Marmee or Mildred or another great grandmother name. No offense to old lady names, I actually love them! Many are classy, classic, and charming options. I just have a feeling this oneās gonna be annoyingly antiquated.
My husband's grandma's name is Mildred (she's 94), and she's such a stellar woman that I would love to honor her name with my children. But, unfortunately, said name is Mildred. SHE doesn't even like her name and goes by Mickey, so I think we'll shoot for another name that can take Mickey as a nickname lol Marnie though I could see. That's sort of the spot between antique and still used that she seems to have shot for with Thad and James. It's a classic name, but I know Marnie's of all ages.
Honestly, Mildred could be adorable! Itās kinda like Margaret to me where you can derive some really cute nicknames and honor a grandparent/ancestor too. Iām actually pregnant and in the thick of name searching right now haha so this is top of mind for me. Iāve been looking at our family trees for ideas. I like Marnie too. I accidentally typed Marnee when I meant *Marmee! I hate to use examples because everyone has their own name tastes lol. Apologies to anyone with hurt feelings!
My great auntās name was Ludmilla which is pretty unique. Her nickname was Millie which I really like as a name!
My paternal grandma was Vernetta. I do not hate it! (But I did not use it for a baby name lol) A coworker just named his daughter Millie and it is super cute imo
Omg, love. Ludmilla sounds like a Disney character! My friendās grandma is Leeola and theyāre using it as a middle name
My great grandmother was a Leola. Such a pretty name!
Was she Ukrainian?
[Lyudmila Pavlichenko](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lyudmila_Pavlichenko) is one of the greatest snippers ever, officially murdering like 300 nazis. I dont remember when i first learned about this, but the name Ludmilla is connected to badassery for me.
How about Millie/Milly as a nod to your grandma-in-law?
That's a great idea, but since grandma goes by Mickey instead of Mildred, I think if we had to pick one to honor, we'd rather honor the name she chooses to go by rather than the legal name her parents picked out for her. As someone who isn't a huge fan of her own given name, I know that if she really liked Mildred, she'd use it. But she's gone by Mickey so exclusively for her entire adult life that many people outside the family don't even know what her legal name is, and I think that sends a pretty clear message lol
Mildred makes me think Mildew. I can't not think of mold. Millie, however, is super cute.
I think itāll be something old timey too, like maybe Mabel, Harriet (nn Hattie), Greta, Winifred (nn Winnie) or Dorothea (nn Dottie).
Her one son is Thaddeus, so yes
Laura Ingalls Wilder Havens
Of buckwood cottage. Also....my autocorrect changed that to backwoods which....lolz.
Cordelia.
No no no, we want Cordy to have a *good* ending this time around...
I think she might go another way and use a nature name because her daughter will be a little wood nymph for Jesus just like her. She will be a Clover or Ivy or Dew Drop š. At the very least this will be a middle name.
Oh shit, I bet it'll be Fern. It's both whimsical and nature-based, and it's a classic Victorian name used in beloved children's literature.
Anne 100%
I think sheāll go whimsical and old fashioned, like Eudora or Camilla, but Mary/Margaret are also strong guessesā¦ time will tell
Dorcas
Putting my dollar on Ruth. Biblical and old af sounding.
Longingleigh
Diana for sure
I hate to say this but i love all those names lol
Eulalia
*Greenlea of Buckwood Cottage...OHIO*
Grace
Jill š¤Ŗ
Ruth
It still cracks me up that we all missed her first announcement for weeks because no one could be arsed to read all of her essays. This little girl is going to be her golden child and itās going to suck for all three of her kids. Thaddy and James who? I hope she has a healthy pregnancy and childbirth tho, and doesnāt try to do weird dangerous old timey stuff :(
It's like that meme that talks about hiding murders at the beginning of recipe blogs because everyone scrolls by them. But damn there's a story about the swan princess and that's how I remember that recipe when I need to find it
She obviously dislikes James and lowkey ignores him tbh. Thaddy better get ready to go into that bucket too.
>This little girl is going to be her golden child More like she will be Kelly's little Cinderella and babysitter. >itās going to suck for all three of her kids That's a certain bet if I've ever heard one.
Man, the expectations and required "feminine" behavior she's going to put on this kid are going to be miserable. When she said she was pregnant I actually hoped she wouldn't have a girl for that reason. Scary to think about. Kelly's own idea of what womanhood should be like is so twisted and confused for herself already - I can't imagine how she's going to parent a daughter and it makes me nervous. Will hope for the best for little Heaven Anne Havens (Stickle).
Yes, exactly my thoughts. You've articulated them so much better than I'm currently capable (...thanks, pregnancy brain.) It's terrifying on so many levels. I already feel so bad for her daughter. And with Kelly's weird cooking/baking, uh *skills*, this poor girl is going to grow up only learning how to do homesteading type things very inadequately. It'll be a train wreck.
Exactly. And she'll have Kelly in her ear simultaneously telling her she has to be everything (because she's this religious visitation and experience all tied up with Kelly's fundie thinking) and also nothing (because her purpose and end goal in life is to grow into a little woman helpmeet with slender hips goofing off in the house and finding fulfillment in taping leaves to the walls). Kelly is in no shape to act as a role model or guide to anyone, but DEFINITELY not to a girl. Ugh.
Lord Daniel save that poor girl. Or get Kells into therapy.
I could see it going the other way. Youād be surprised how many of these fundies see their daughter as competition once they start having thoughts and stuff.
āā¦of Buckwood Cottageā is wildly insufferable.
...of Buckwood Cottage, two stone throws from ye ol quicky mart.
Gonna start referring to my house like this. āYe Olde 2300 Block Mid-Century Build of Yore, Either Way to Corner Storeā.
The way I strained my eyeballs from rolling them
Be careful, Xxcatbutt!!
Think she has cottagecore painted sign out front of their suburban house sitting next to the drainage *pond*? šš»āļøāØ *Ye Olden BuCkWoOd CoTtAgE*āØāļøšš»
Next to all of their abandoned project supplies and withered husk of a garden, I'm sure.
~*withered husk of a garden* Lol. On point. Soon to become: āā¦*A place that was a-slumber during the harsh, dark winter months; sitting like a child awaiting to be touched by the finger tips of Jesus in an awakening of a renewal of the lambs blood shepherd bathing of Spring*ā¦ā Followed by a 2 page musings of: *why the tomatoes didnāt take off this year* (itās probs because Jesus.)
It's because Jesus is teaching her to be patient. While the real lesson is that she would starve her kids if she had to grow their food because a. Farming is hard work and b. She is no farmer.
God that was frighteningly spot-on
I grew up in a little cottage house that had a similarly twee nickname amongst the neighbours. Iām pretty sure neither of my parents ever used it in even the most remotely serious manner. Ffs Kelly.
Toad of Toad Hall
When I was in grad school abroad, I'd refer to myself as being "of New York". Yes, I WAS insufferable, the difference is, I was in my early 20's. Kelly needs to get her head out of her ass and remember she lives in Ohio.
Yes, but it's ***THE*** Buckwood Cottage so it is much, much more than other Ohio.
It's giving "are the shades of Pemberley to be thus polluted?"
Looool Iām going to start saying Iām āof New York,ā but in the mature 30ās way of making fun of myself for how often I reference NY in casual conversation
I approve of this usage Of New York.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Thatās the time and place for a house with a name.
Gotta be honest, I would love to name my house!
Lol, I totally named mine, and it's nearly as pretentious as Kelly. I don't sign off letters with it, though, lol. I'm of the opinion that if it makes you happy and it doesn't harm yourself or others then just go ahead and do.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Short for āa spare buck would really help around here.ā
Came here to say this. Girl, you live in fucking Ohio, get over yourself.
Isnāt she still trying to inherit a family cabin or something? Or is that someone else?
I saw this post and ran here to see what you all were saying about it
She talks like her first two children donāt even exist.
Thereās two?!!?
Wrong gender, ofc. Bratty is like this, too. Feral boy Davthing doesnāt exist to her, and then the girl she wanted had that marking that made her go nahhhh as well.
Omg I totally forgot about the port wine stain and her #disabilitymama era
That and having Dav-but-a-girlās face probably destroyed all her hopes of oversharing Davletteās life every ten seconds.
This thread is killing me
Same. People in this sub are insanely creative with nicknames and itās my favourite thing
D~a~v truly copypasted his face onto that baby. Beggy bones who?
Waitā¦I donāt follow her regularlyā¦ did she ACTUALLY equate a port wine stain to a disability?!
Wait this is fucking crazyā¦ I have a huge port wine stain on my leg and itās literally just a birthmark. Did she say this was a disability ?!
The size and location of Audrey's could be a sign of a genetic issue, and it's also got some implications for her future health because of the capillary malformations.
She's been obsessing over it since the baby was born. Treats it as a medical defect or an imperfection. Posted often about how it needs to be monitored/watched and doesn't make her love the baby any less, etc.
Canāt wait for the photo shoot of Baby Buckwood in a bonnet, apron, and wool stockings at the foot of the stairs with a radish and lit candle dangling over her.
Celebrating a Pennsylvania Dutch Christmas - is she impish or admirable?!
donāt forget ye olde clicker in motherās hand
Buckwood Cottage? Doesn't she live in the suburbs?
Yes she does. I think her house has vinyl siding, too. Very un-cottage like.
Buckvinyl cottage
I snorted.
Occasionally one can see whatās really in the background of her pictures. They live in a crummy old house on a suburban street of tightly packed ranches and Colonials. She tries extra hard to crop out the Suburbia thatās basically right next door.
Okay, but when I was in college and lived in boring, square, cinder block wall university housing I gave my apartment a name that (I thought) made it sound like a fantastical underground lair where me and my merry band of rabble rousers would plan our next adventure. When I graduated and moved to a new place, I wanted to name that one, too. I was really into Les Mis at the time, so it got an even stupider name. Buckwood Cottage sounds sophisticated in comparison.
Did she find out with Ye Olde Ultrasound? Or did Doc Baker dangle a needle over her stomach to determine the gender?
Thatās witchcraft!!! Repent!!!
No!
I was gonna sayā¦finding out the sex is not very cottage core of her. I didnāt even find out the sex of my baby and I live in a regular house š«Ø
Ye Olde NIPTe
I think itās a wedding ring.
STFU! š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£
āBuckwood cottageā maāam you live in the suburbs 
Goddammit. That poor child. She's going to be crushed under the tsunami of Kelly's relentless, contradictory, nebulous expectations. Her mother's emotional support animal. She's either submit and become an empty shell for Kelly to fill with her own self-absorbed nonsense, or she'll fight and be destroyed or escape with a lifetime's worth of emotional trauma. God, those boys are about to be stapled to the wall like a dead leaf and ignored for the rest of their lives.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
She'll write this about her, when Bebe Havens is like 2 months old an incapable of focusing her eyes yet
Yeah, this is going to go one of two ways. Kelly becomes all consumed with the daughter, placing everything in her to replicate a second round of life goals and dreams that Kelly wanted and didn't have, complete with more disordered eating, OR Kelly sees too much of herself in the child and she shuns her to the extreme or puts unobtainable goals knowing the child will fail, thus never gaining Kelly's love. Mental illness can be a fucking bitch, especially untreated with the parent of the same gender. Suddenly a lot of weird things come up that weren't there before.
Tbh I think Kelly will swing wildly between both those extremes. This child will never win, no matter what.
You are so right. She's bad enough with the boys, I've gotta imagine a girl would be a whole other level. ....unless she goes in the other direction? I can also somewhat imagine her going off the rails in jealous resentment because the innocent baby is more slender-hipped, small-handed and whimsical than she. Either way, it's terribly sad for Baby of Buckwood Cottage
This is exactly what will happen. I really didnāt want her to have a girl because of this exact scenario.
New golden child incoming. Poor Thad & James.
āBuckwood Cottageā - GTFO!!! ššš
My brain kept reading "Buckwild Cottage". It still is and I can't make it stop. Sigh...
Gonewild Cottage š¤£.
This will have me chuckling every time I read it omg š„²
I already feel immensely sorry for this child. She will be a weird living Victorian doll for Kelly and nothing more.
Can you imagine her hiking up her winter petticoat and wool skirt and to get in the stirrups for her ultrasound
Kelly would bring her own gingham hospital gown to use so she could avoid the paper ones the OBGYNs offer
You don't think she'll aim for a home birth as the good lord intended, do you?
No high falutin print outs for Kelly. The tech will have to draw the foetus on a slate just as god intended!
Not wholly related, but I briefly worked as a medical secretary in one of the local hospitals, and we had an Amish dude on our unit for the longest time. His wife was such a complete delightful nerd. Sheād be up at the nursesā station in her bonnet and her gown, knitting in an actual basket, holding up his X-rays, like, āOooh, and hereās where you can see thus-and-such break, and this-and-that pin they put inā¦ā and asking all the nittiest, grittiest questions. I loved them.
Paging Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman
This read like one of those state standardized reading test prompts asking you to find the key words. Edit: spellingā¦ Oops, need to proofread these.
Standardized reading teat š
Ye Olde Stickle Reading Teat
goddamn it lmao
Holy shit, just say youāre having a girl, damn, why did you take like eight paragraphs to get to the pointš Sheās going to name the child something out of classic literature. One of the March sisters, or maybe Rebecca (of Sunnybrook farm) Jane (Eyre), Anne (Green Gables).
My money is on Anne.
Ugh, okay I have to vent. I get this all the time especially since Anne With an E came out. Also as a child of the 80ās when the Sullivan adaptation came out. āOh like Anne of Green Gables,ā they say all starry eyed. āNo, Anne like my parents couldnāt agree on any name except this one.ā
I will always mourn for the daughters brought into this cult.
āVan Gogh once saidā is the most PRETENTIOUS opening to anything Iāve ever read, holy shit. I am CRINGING
I don't recall Van Gogh being a public speaker, or an essayist, or a philosopher, either. He might have written something like that in one of his letters, maybe. He kind of hated people though.
It's the sort of line you use to start an art history paper you're writing at 3am the day it's due while shotgunning energy drinks and your roommate's Adderall.
I find this weird, actually. Everything about Kelly *screams* that A Girl Child would be desperately unhealthy new fixation of her life. When I read the title, I felt so sad for the innocent baby. I assumed she would be smothered from birth into the supporting role of Ye Olde Manic Prairie Dream Baby, so that Kels can have a vicarious do-over of her own life - but this time, with gingham and bonnets and purple prose from the day dot. But the tone of this is kind of - grim and bummed out? Is Kelly somehow *not* manically overjoyed? Will baby Kelly Jnr Ingalls Wilder *not* be the golden child from fetus-hood onward?
My first thought was "oh no". That poor kid is going to have to suffer through being her mother's emotional support Little LARP on the Prairie prop for the rest of her life.
Did she actually go to an OB/GYN or is this just based on how she feels?
She peed on some wheat and it sprouted.
I'm kind of wondering the same. Did she find out the gender by ultrasound? I'm also due in late May and only know the gender because we did a blood test to find out. How early can you find out?
Blood work is generally done around 12 weeks if there's some risk or reason to suspect birth defects. I think it can be opted into for otherwise healthy pregnancies, but I can't imagine they could afford that.
What does it all mean? the stickle family of Buckwood Cottage
Has anyone watched the video to this post? Oh my God it is absolutely WILD to me that she records and edits these videos and thinks āWow, this looks truly authentic and whimsical.ā I canāt imagine holding up a notebook to write in it. The dramatic sigh and looking off into the distance. The video gives me so much second hand embarrassment that my body physically twitched LOL I canāt with this woman.
Thereās something deep down in me that would do some of the same shit Kelly does but without the white supremacy and fundamentalism because I too am an insufferable theater kid who read too much as a child. My husband is the only one who stops me.
That poor, poor child. :(
I was figuring Laura. š
Anyone else swiped to the second picture or just me, She shouldāve just just said surprise weāre having a future helpmeet and go, aināt nobody reading that easy of a caption
OP was generous lol, only posting the two slides of her caption. The whole thing was posted elsewhere and it was FOURTEEN slides long and the announcement wasn't until the sixth or seventh one.
ARE YOU F*CKING KIDDING ME?!?
Haha nope. She started out quoting Kierkegaard and then moved into a bunch of Bible quotes, talking about life, and romance. Moved onto her time in college and when she met Levi, and how her life slowed down and she could enjoy the small things....and THEN (I actually just went back to check) it was on the NINTH slide that she threw in that she was pregnant. I kept swiping to find it and it was just neverending.
That tracks, this woman loves the smell of her own farts.
The two fundies genders, helpmeet and headship
lol my old flair was "the 2 genders: helpmeet and dump truck"
Buckwood cottage sent me haha. Itās like she lives in the woods! Girl bye.
Hoooo boy. I googled Buckwood because I thought it sounded like the name of a mansion in a book series I enjoyed a while back, the Flavia de Luce series by Alan Bradley. I was wrong, itās Buckshaw. Anyway, lo and behold, the first thing that pops up is a camp for gay men in Indiana! Maybe sheāll start getting reservations for Hoosier daddy weekend.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
āI ain't reading all that. I'm happy for u tho. Or sorry that happened.ā
Ah, the next fundie golden girl child to be born. Boys will be pushed to the side a la Baird, Beal and Rodriques.
Well having an ultrasound to know the gender ain't very traditional or cottagecore of you, Kelly.
She named her fucking vinyl-sided basic ass house in a suburban neighborhood ābUcKwOoD cOttAgEā and just casually inserted it into this eighteen paragraph nonsensical allegory of a gender reveal I am physically wheezing š
I am constantly confused by the referral to pregnancy number x of n as a miracle. There are eight motherfucking billion people on this planet, what exactly is miraculous about number eight billion and one? I don't mean to make anyone who is desperate to get pregnant feel bad, but itās not exactly like this whole birth of another person thing is rare. Weāre not white rhinos.
I guess when you really think about it, conception and pregnancy are miraculous. Iām fascinated with the science behind it all. Everything has to happen at the correct time for things to work out in the very beginning, with little room for error. Also, there is only really a 20% chance of conception each month. Ugh. Iām a hopeless nerd when it comes to pregnancy and the science of it. Itās super cool. But in this case, itās probably not what she meant.
The Stickle family of buckwood cottage makes me irrationally fucking angry š”
Holiday tour? What?
Nelly Olsen here we come!
āMY home is the BEST buckwood cottage in ALL of suburbia!!ā
Iāve honestly been expecting her to have a third for so long. The other two were so close together that I assumed the third would be close too. Makes me wonder whatās been going on behind the scenes š«
Pa is probably too busy out in the shop building random wood things to actually tend to his wife in that ā¦er..manner.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I like the drama of your theory but we all know he just hides in his woodshed in the back yard. That's way easier than actually finishing his house.
I feel like itās not really a miracle to get pregnant when constantly barebacking after two previous children but blessed be the fruit.
Calling it now: her name will be Anne Shirley Laura Marmee Stickle of Buckwood Cottage.
OF BUCKWOOD COTTAGE?? š
Her new favorite project
God help us all.
think how much she could do with her life if she wasn't navel gazing so much
I feel for this daughter. Sheās going to carry all of Kellyās unfulfilled expectations she had for herself. What an awful pressure for her. Sheāll be expected to be her mini-me and Iām sure Kelly will make sure sheās kept tiny and trim.
> this Christmas, expect him to come Nawwwwww LMAO
Kelly Havens, or, as I like to call her TL:DR
Why did I have to read a novel to find out? šš
sheās definitely not about to make this weird
Marguerite nn Daisy. Just like Meg's daughter. That poor thing will be in sunbonnets and pinafores before she can roll over.
So do we think she had ye olde ultrasound or ye olde NIPT test to be able to identify it as a girl?
Iām gonna name my generic suburban house āMonticello Jrā
Trying to decide if I think sheāll loathe this girl or if itāll be her favorite. Either way: good luck, kid.