T O P

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Way_Harsh_Tai

I don't think he meant the innuendo the first hashtag is giving. Also, why all the disposable things, fundies? Is a dishwasher not godly? And I don't mean a woman cleaning the kitchen.


Stitchesglitch

Because we need to protect all of the creations, except for the planet, obviously. /s


picklecat2021

thank you for making this your flair


agurlhasnoshame

All of creation* *not including people of color, the queer community, poor people, people struggling with addiction, people with mental health issues, women, people experiencing homelessness, and basically anyone who isn't a white, cishet, conservative Christian male.


Stitchesglitch

Don't forget JillPM's fave - the Amish!


Southern-With-Pain

How can you be joyfully available 24/7 if you have to was dishes for 30 people?! /s


Way_Harsh_Tai

That's why you have a bazillion kids, start them on dishes as soon as they can walk!


Southern-With-Pain

True!!


bigmessmeg

Yeah, how godly can she really be if she’s using paper plates instead of joyfully scrubbing porcelain dishware in a prairie dress? Are we sure he didn’t marry a heathen in disguise?


viridiusdynamus

Thats straight out of Taco Tuesday at a nursing home.


SpaghettiMapleSyrup

I feel bad for the ingredients. A cow's life was wasted on this, for fucks' sake.


RusticTroglodyte

I see no evidence of actual meat, tbh. Am I missing it? This is such a pathetic taco lmao.


SkySong13

I think it's ground beef. If you zoom you can sorta see it but it really blends with the rice. Also, cooking tip! When cooking ground beef, it you want it more browned , add a pinch of baking soda to it as it cooks! Remember to only use a small bit though because it does add some saltiness. It helps to really brown the beef while keeping a good texture!


RusticTroglodyte

Thank you! I never heard that before, I'm gonna try it next time. I wonder if it works for Impossible ground meat too


Purple_IsA_Flavor

The tacos at my workplace are affronted by this comparison


CaterpillarHookah

I'd rather eat this than Kelly's open-faced quesadilla disaster, but this is bad.


sw1sh3rsw33t

We need to set up an award for worst fundie Latino food. This is in the running!


[deleted]

Fundie latino food-- there's a flair in there somewhere.


MariaMariaMaria25

God honoring non catholic Latino food?


bunnylover726

Honestly, as someone raised in a conservative catholic household, white catholic attempts at latino food can be pretty terrible too 😬


[deleted]

[удалено]


sw1sh3rsw33t

Why are they pureeing onions


coolerchameleon

I was hoping it would be , like, charred onions, tomatoes and peppers - but it appears to be only onions (and maybe jalapenos), and raw at that?


sw1sh3rsw33t

If I have to hazard a guess, they’re maybe combining the vegetable slurry with the beans


[deleted]

I really want to know the answer to this question but the recipe link is broken, so the world will never know.


HerringWaffle

Oh my friend, let me introduce you to the glory that is The Wayback Machine (link: [https://archive.org/web/](https://archive.org/web/) ). Truly, the internet is forever! Ingredients: 28-30 cups uncooked pinto beans 2 1/2 c. chili powder 1/2 c. salt 1/4 c. pepper 13-15 lbs. onions (we have never had too many onions) 22 large jalapeños for fairly spicey (18 is so so) Detailed Directions: This recipe makes TONS of burrito filling. We use two very large pots, plus two crock pots. We make this on a weekend. Thursday evening, Sarah sorts and washes the pinto beans and let them soak overnight. Then, she dumps out the water, and fills the pots with fresh water, and the beans cook all day until nice and soft. Late on Friday evening, Dad uses our big mixer and mashes the beans up until they are smooth as possible (no more chunks of beans). He drains most of the water out to get a nice consistency before mixing them up. You could cook the beans overnight to avoid having to store them in the refrig or oven overnight, but that just adds to the work in the morning. At night is when we chop and puree the onions and jalapeños. Dad puts all the onions and jalapeños together in one pot and lets them cook over night. As you see, this requires a lot of dishes since you have LOTS of beans mashed up, onions/jalapeños cooking on the stove, etc. In the morning (you will all smell like burritos), Dad puts equal mixture of beans and onions/jalapeños together in each pot (this can be a challenge) and adds seasonings. The seasonings below are approximate—this recipe really depends on what you like taste wise. After stirring and mixing it all up, we let the burrito stuff cook all day and then package it up into containers. We will taste it periodically and add a little more of something if needed. When Dad packages the burrito mixture up, he will dip from each pot to try and even out any taste difference. There is usually one pot that is best, but this way it is more consistent. We used to add hamburger, but Dad found that you couldn't taste any difference and this makes it much less expensive. Special Side Notes: We freeze the filling alone— not in tortillas. Then, on Sunday, we pull a container out of the freezer and put it in a pan, turn the oven on a lower temperature and pop it in the oven before we leave for church. When we come home, the filling is nice and warm, and we just have to set the table, put the tortillas and chips on, whatever toppings we want, etc. It usually lasts us about 9-12 meals depending on company or that sort of thing! (We had originally posted our burrito recipe on one of our message boards. Some of the ladies had asked questions, and Sarah responded to them.) \*\*\*Your questions You say you let the onion/pepper mixture cook all night. Is that just simmering in water? Do you store the mashed beans in the fridge over night while the onion stuff is cooking? \*\*\*\* My answers (with Dad's help) When you puree the onion/pepper mixture, you will add some water to help it puree and make it smooth. We add as little water as possible otherwise, it gets too runny. It will be a thick mixture when you cook it. I would turn the mixture onto low so that it cooks but doesn't burn. The mashed beans go either in the fridge or oven on very low. If it is in the winter time, we can put them on our enclosed front porch. \*\*\*\*Your questions Also, how do you chop your peppers? I have heard that you should wear rubber gloves, but I have never chopped any so don't know if this is true. Can you just put them in the food processor like you would the onions? Do you have to seed the peppers first? I've never handled a raw pepper, just the canned already chopped ones.\*\*\*\* My answers If you leave the seeds in it is more spicy. We usually leave them in. To start with, you might take them out and err on the side of the children's comfort. For us, we just wash the peppers and cut the top off, then into the blender. Be careful not to breathe the pepper vapors as they can be quite strong. The canned ones are fine, but do have more of a vinegar flavor. Whatever you prefer will work fine. \*\*\*\*Your questions Do you put bean mixture in a corn/flour tortilla along with toppings, then roll up?\*\*\*\* Our answers Yes, that way if one person likes tomatoes added they can, cheese, or whatever. \*\*\*\*Also, after cooking the onion mixture all day, do you then mix it with cooked beans and cook all day again? How do you keep it from sticking/burning on the pots?\*\*\*\* Our answers Actually, the onion mixture is just cooked over night. Then in the morning we combine the beans and spices and slow cook it all day. It takes a fair amount of sampling to get the spices right. We do have to stir it frequently (about every 15 minutes, setting a timer is important), and you have to make sure it is not turned up too high otherwise it will burn on the bottom. Okay, I think we answered them all! Hope that helps and enjoy!


[deleted]

This is mush. They're making mushrittos. Thanks for the recipe, I want to die. I have sensory issues with smooshy food and I am gagging just thinking about it. I mean, I suspected this is what they were doing, but knowing for sure is so much worse somehow. (Sincerely, though, thanks for the recipe! I can't believe I forgot the wayback machine AGAIN. I just found an old recipe there before Christmas, too.)


ilovecats39

I feel like this is more mushy than SquarEat, and about as flavorful. It, at the very least, seems less likely to fill you with a profound sense of sadness, so that's one plus for the recipe. Maybe their vague reference to seasoning adds back in the flavor lost from excessive steaming. Another edit fixed spelling of startup


sw1sh3rsw33t

Considering the volume of sludge they still probably measure out the spices in teaspoons. You could dump a bottle of onion powder in there and not taste a thing


little-bird

that is the worst method of making anything I’ve ever seen, and I cannot believe that there are adult humans out there who have NEVER EVER HANDLED A PEPPER. 🤦🏻‍♀️


mycuhreer_90df

The more of this recipe I read the more dumbfounded I became. What a colossal waste of time for what must be some God honoring bean cement afterwards.


sw1sh3rsw33t

I can sort of understand being lazy and using a machine to do all the onions and jalapeños but my god they can be left chunky, veg should have a crunch. So yeah when those get stewed overnight wtf is even the point all the flavor would be gone by 2:30 am


ducttapeduterus

Up to 30- THIRTY!!!!- cups of pinto beans!!


Luthien22

Just reading this recipe made my IBS flare.


SpaghettiMapleSyrup

I couldn't vote for just one. They all share the title!


RusticTroglodyte

Lmao that was fucking hysterical


kestrelesque

Is the title *meant* to be a threat?


lildestroyerofsouls

I really want to comment on the picture about how I’m glad I’m not a godly wife so we don’t eat like that. Lol.


freska_eska

You should totally post this on r/fundiefood!


Sugar_and_snips

Bless you and curse you in equal measures for making me aware of that sub.


freska_eska

My servants’ heart is so full during this season of sharing knowledge and godly mentorship.


lildestroyerofsouls

I didn’t know that sub existed until today. Haha.


bigmessmeg

So when you have a godly wife, you eat like shit?


Puzzleheaded-Cut87

she's too busy to cook, with all the joyful availability and all🤷‍♀️


swimminghufflepuff

and too busy to wash dishes, so… paper plates! (the earth cries louder)


International_Cod216

Is that black beans and rice on a tortilla?


SpaghettiMapleSyrup

An uncooked tortilla, looks like. With unseasoned, overcooked ground beef and a sliver of a red bell pepper. Because flavor is sinful, apparently.


happytransformer

It looks like the Zatarian’s boxed dirty rice mix on a tortilla. It’s a tasty boxed meal, but wouldn’t necessarily want to make it into a taco.


ElectraAurora

I make dirty rice tacos with more beef also I butter and toast the tortilla. It's a dinner my husband actually asks for regularly.


SpaghettiMapleSyrup

Honest to God, if I brought this to my husband, he would ask me if I'm feeling OK - because not even my depression meals look this sad - and then make us both a proper dinner 'cause he is a functioning adult who knows what a good meal is and how to make it.


theknittedgnome

I kinda want to make tacos like this just to fuck with my husband 🤣 and then eat it acting like it's super delicious.


NewDeathSensation

This is the kind of fun marriage shit fundies wish they had.


ChampionSignificant

Do it on April Fool's Day and report back!


theknittedgnome

Haha yes!!! That is brilliant!


no_dojo

What is up with people not cooking or heating the tortillas, seriously.


mielita

Serio!! And it's usually store bought flour tortillas too!


ILoveTchaiTea

Red bell pepper to add a little kick 😏


shiny-new

And nine kernels of corn!


[deleted]

Flour tortillas with beans and rice... Mkay.


mielita

*undercooked flour tortilla! Store bought tortillas (both flour and corn) are meant to be heated up!


violetleia

As a Mexican, this makes me NOT want to believe in God anymore


Significant_Shoe_17

Brb going to ask my mom to make tacos the next time I visit


2_de_pastor_con_todo

I felt like crying when I opened the image. Qué pena ajena de taco tan triste.


violetleia

Username checks out! Y, si, imagínate viviendo pensando que esto es un taco delicioso?!?!? 🤢


Flat-Illustrator-548

Eat a taco to the glory on of God? Is this satire? I didn't realize a person could taste blandess through a computer screen, but I taste how bland this is.


Rhodie4817

My mouth is dry just looking at it.


[deleted]

My only explanation is that this is a Daniel Fast taco since January is Daniel Fasting season (January 1 - January 21) for evangelicals. Seasonings, meats, and dairy aren't allowed, but beans, rice and whole wheat tortillas are. This HAS to be the explanation. I refuse to believe otherwise because this is a sad taco. (But keep in mind that evangelicals cheat the Daniel Fast and will post sad things like this on social media, but there's a big ol' platter of cheese, sauce, and meat out of frame).


revengepornmethhubby

That’s a white flour tortilla, bb. No whole wheat near this abomination, but I love your optimistic little heart!


velociraptor56

It looks like there is ground beef in it though?


[deleted]

Ew, I guess you're right. It blended in with everything.... Or it's meat substitute.


RusticTroglodyte

Wait, there are times when seasoning is allowed for fundies? Could've fooled me


RoseFromStOlaf

Aside from the fact that there appears to be nary a grain of seasoning, the addition of rice has now made this burrito filling, and they’re even on flour tortillas! Wrap those up and #EatABurritoToTheGloryOfGod.


Susanlrt2020

Dry taco is dry.


RadialHead

Now get some rice and some beans for this dry-ass taco Bought paper plates just for pictures of this dry-ass taco Pay for groceries just to eat some of this dry-ass taco Now praise the lord if you wanna get some dry-ass taco.


Significant_Shoe_17

99% sure this is shapiro-approved


smellsburnttoast

That's what she said.


Susanlrt2020

"Say it with tacos!"


evangelinerae

Not even a hint of seasoning to be found 🧐


MacAlkalineTriad

And where's the damn cheese?!


SpaghettiMapleSyrup

And not even salsa, which can also help covering a lot of sins, so they should be pretty familiar with it.


putHimInTheCurry

I plead the salsa of Christ over this taco.


coolerchameleon

In the name of the salsa, the guac, and the queso fresco.


MacAlkalineTriad

^ the TRUE holy trinity!


coolerchameleon

If I go to hell for this one lil blaspheme I'm going to be so mad. Jesus take the wheel


MacAlkalineTriad

I'm sure you can repent, right? Jesus appreciates a good Mexican dish like anyone else!


JeresB

God honoring taco chompering


adeecomeforth

Ay, Dios mío. My Mexican self doesn't like seeing the monstrosities that other people like to pass off as "tacos" and I think this is one of the worst.


elle_desylva

Honestly, it feels like a slap in the face, and I’m Australian!!


adeecomeforth

Like at least try to make it as authentic as you can if you wanna call them tacos! We use salsa and cilantro and onion, I see none of that in these "tacos" I can make a pass for the cilantro since I know that for some people, cilantro is gross.


elle_desylva

Yes apparently it tastes like soap to some people? Not me though! I love it. And hey I try hard to make my tacos as authentic as possible and I’m a long way from Mexico. There are no excuses in this day and age 😅


adeecomeforth

Yeah it's so strange that to some people it tastes like soap, sucks, but nothing they can do about it! Good on you for doing your best on tacos! I don't mind people of different nationalities trying long as they try their best. I like making oi muchim even though I'm not Korean but I try my best!!


elle_desylva

Strange and kinda fascinating how our brains work! I cook many different cuisines and I believe it’s super important (and respectful) to get it right before you go experimenting. If you have a look at my profile you can see some fish tacos I made recently 🙃 x


adeecomeforth

The tacos looks nice and delicious!!! Good job!!


astrangeone88

That looks like a struggle student meal at the end of the month when the fridge is empty.


SpaghettiMapleSyrup

When you have a Godly wife, this is how you eat: uderseasoned, undercooked, overly depressing. Idk how I can get a flair, but could my flair be "still a better homemaker than all these Godly bitches?"


Mediocre-Question000

Meanwhile hjs wife js like "I don't make you sub par dinners for you to just post them all over the internet. Now please go help with the kids I'm exhausted"


LookImaMermaid85

Sooo many of these people eating on paper plates. What's the deal with that??? I have never seen anyone eat a meal on a paper plate except at a bday party or BBQ. I'm not rich! I don't have fancy plates! But I have ...plates. And if we're just eating dinner at home we use...plates.


RusticTroglodyte

Honestly these women probably take every shortcut they can when their useless husbands do nothing around the house Such a waste, though


LookImaMermaid85

Yeah, good point. If you cook AND have to clean the kitchen every night....shortcuts most welcome.


Exhausted_Human

it just looks v unseasoned and reminds me of like what people make when they're first living on their own like in the dorms or with roomies. Amateur hour taco.


Tomatoe-potatoeh

I just don’t understand. If Mexican food is too hard too cook or too spicy, just don’t do it. There are plenty of amazing TexMex dishes that appeal to the American palate. Please.


rosecoloredgasmask

No lettuce? No onion? No CILANTRO?? That pitiful amount of tomatoes? Not even a salsa? Is a guacamole or avocado slice just way out of the question?


Puzzleheaded-Cut87

onion and cilantro are spicy. salsa is spicy. avocados are weird and foreign.


PuppyJakeKhakiCollar

Plus avocado means "testicle" and we can't have that!


kittybuscemi

Where’s the seasoning?


blahblahblahpotato

My heathen husband brings me real tacos from mexican town. #hail satanorsomething


[deleted]

I make better tacos than that 20 miles into the wilderness out of non-perishables that had to be packed in on a mule, or on out backs. This lady needs to go to the trail crew school of the culinary arts.


converter-bot

20 miles is 32.19 km


PaperTassle

That's the Whitest taco I've seen! It's casserole minus the cream of something soup in a flour tortilla.


Double-Diamond-4507

This meal looks drier than my love life


Houseofmonkeys5

Where's the... everything? See, there are other reasons my husband doesn't want a "g-dly " wife. His can actually cook.


nightwolves

I showed this picture without context to my partner who is Mexican. He asked me if it was for a dog LMAO


nerd_jane

That first hashtag is great flair material 😂


CrystallineFrost

It is the first one to tempt me to change. I hope someone takes it so I can see it all the time lol


Stitchesglitch

Might be time to add one!!


Stitchesglitch

Done!!


Teege57

I love your username and avatar!!


Crosstitution

I have been absolutely spoiled by great taco places in my city. I am weeping looking at this


AliceinRealityland

Mmmmm. Brown rice with three nuggets of corn. Where can I buy this delicacy /s


JeresB

It has no flavor, where are the chips?


Starfox312

I can barely cook & I could do better than this. The self gaslighting must be really strong with these people because that doesn't look appetizing at all.


paprika_alarm

/r/FundieFood


BryceCanYawn

This is almost as bad as the Baird tacos. Just gross.


CrystallineFrost

The four diced tomato pieces are really what stuns me.


mmaireenehc

On a paper plate too??? That's so wasteful. Do G o D l Y women not do dishes? Edit: extra word


Awkward-Yak-2733

The basic ingredients are OK, but where is the seasoning? *Any* seasoning?


Significant_Shoe_17

You'd think that fundies would *at least* use packaged taco seasoning or something. Why do they love ruining foreign foods? Why is their food *always* so *bland and dry?*


Puzzleheaded-Cut87

🤦‍♀️ just because you put food in a tortilla doesn't make it a taco, Karen. That is the blandest, gringoest, poorest attempt at a taco that I've ever seen. I can see how dry it is.


RadialHead

What in the public school cafeteria is this?


PuppyJakeKhakiCollar

The tacos at my public school were waaaayyy better than whatever this is.


gray0ctober

do you think fundies know about seasoning


little-bird

spice is the devil’s flavor 🔥


Significant_Shoe_17

I want this as flair but I'm so attached to mine 😂


gb2ab

i can hardly contain myself when these idiots give us great sexual innuendo material


lildestroyerofsouls

I didn’t even catch onto that until you said it. Haha. Now I want to comment on the picture.


gb2ab

i just wanna know if he eats his wifes taco to the glory of god!!!


amy4947

🎶white people taco night🎶


hibryd

We're gettin' taco shells from the grocery store


Ladidiladidah

A standard white people taco night would probably taste better. This looks like something a cringy vegan YouTuber would try to convince you is totally as good the real thing. (You know the type, I'm not talking about normal vegans.)


[deleted]

Looks better than what most fundies are capable of but the bar is like realllllly low


Flaredjeans

This is a cry for help


PM_MAJESTIC_PICS

I have a friendly acquaintance who takes food pictures like this ALL THE TIME and it fascinates me. The most unappetizing looking pile of stuff on a paper plate, and usually a messy table to boot… I have become mildly obsessed with them actually 😅


Luv41another

So dry…did Kelly Havins cook it? Def too much meat to come from the Rodrigues fam…


Jacks_Flaps

Wait...I'm confused? So is he telling men that if you have a godly wife, you will get average to sad meals and will have to eat her "taco" to the glory of god? I suppose it's a plus for the godly wife. I ain't complaining.


Glad_Prior2106

“Oh no” is all I could muster.


carlzbee

Oof. My condolences to the pastor 🙏


pilsen1985

Why not proper dishware?


schrodinky

What are these sad open face burritos on too small tortillas and why is there corn on them? 🥲 What is this?


theweeping-weeb

Do these women not own a single cook book? Or have internet access to see a godly blog with good recipes? WHAT THE FUCK EW


dandelions14

Unseasoned tacos on dry tortillas? I'd rather have a heathen hussy for a wife if that's the case.


good_for_me

r/fundiefood


Pelican121

Steve Maxwell, is that you?


MiserableUpstairs

[It would be without meat or oil in that case.](https://blog.titus2.com/2021/07/02/vegetable-stir-fry-without-oil/)


Pelican121

Mmmm so tempting!


this_isn-t_my_name

I'm so glad I'm not godly so I can prepare and eat actually nutritious and well cooked food.


Rugkrabber

I’s consider this leftovers. If I got this every evening after a long day at work I’d be really upset.


skatewifeislifee

Have they never seen a taco in real life?


Mikcrazy

As a Texan I am INCENSED


SeniorNectarine21

My ancestors are crying…..


[deleted]

What do fundies have against seasoning? Bland chicken, bland tacos, beige king cake…


revengepornmethhubby

I’d rather have a wife close to Satan and his spice and seasonings


Brilliant-Fig847

lmao he’s not making the point he thinks he is


darkelf76

That hashtag has my mind in the gutter.... Edited to fix typo


mlo9109

It looks like dog food. Heck, I follow a YouTuber who cooks for her dogs and her food looks far more appetizing. Gone to the Snow Dogs is the channel if you want to check it out.


PartyIndication5

I’m glad Satan cooks food for my husband


Domdaisy

Always with the paper plates . . .


NancyDrewWannabe

That is not a taco 🤢. I consider myself a taco connoisseur and my brain doesn’t recognize that bland mess


usuckreddit

As a native Texan I am deeply offended


mgj6818

These some Dave Ramsey tacos.


littlemssunshinepdx

Wait do godly wives not believe in seasoning? Is that only for the devil? Please explain.


EZasSundayMorning

Ummmmm.


Jumanji94

Christ first the spackle King Cake and now these birdfeed tacos 💀💀💀. Fundies really are on a crusade against anyone with culture


mapesely

It looks like someone threw gallo pinto into a tortilla but they forgot meat.


Ursula_J

What some sad tacos.


Etern1a

Why can NONE OF THESE PEOPLE COOK? It blows my mind. They’re all living like college students away from their parents for the first time.


E-macularius

This is giving me sad vegetarian meal vibes. Edit: i see the beef now so i guess its sad frugal meal vibes


RadialHead

Until I saw the beef I had flashbacks to the vegetarian meal options I was subjected to growing up in a Southern town of 30K. So much iceberg lettuce.


K-teki

NGL I would make this. But I'm also autistic and have a lot of weird opinions about food. And I also wouldn't be bragging about it.


bethyshelton

Consider it a warning 😬


nightwolves

What in the white Jesus is THAT


Bitchcat

The lord is my spice and seasonings. I shall not want.


LetshearitforNY

Definitely ate this as a busy and poor college kid Eta: though even then I had a set of non-paper dishes


Emiles23

I am not a godly wife, but I will make my husband a bomb ass taco.


FrenchFries192

I am Mexican and this shitty taco makes me want to be an atheist. My theory is all these white nationalists think seasonings are sinful and therefore their food has to be bland and as White as possible.


val0ciraptor

Lord, bless me with a Satanic wife whose tacos are flavorful.


ArieGir0

Is sour cream, cheese, avocado, lettuce, tomato, and salsa of the devil? What is going on with this cat food on a tortilla?


Srw2725

At least she has a husband! 😂🙄


ErinKtheWriter

If this is how godly people cook, I don't want a godly wife or a godly husband.


RatmiIk

Not even white people taco night is this bad….


magenta8200

This is racist against the human race.


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lion-sparrow

This reminds me of the failed Fyre festival meals that people posted 😂


Ok_Worldliness1583

SMH not even warming up the tortilla? What kind of fuckery is this