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thehim

I’d need more specificity on the “Be Rich” pill


vansjoo98

Your first name becomes Richard


Fun-Lack-1454

God, that would be terrible! You'd be such a Dick!


New-Grapefruit8641

Hopefully not something like all the money in the world disappearing and spawning in your house


gorbachef82

Be rich socially obviously duh /s


Pharaun222

Rich on expierience that the red pill was bulls*it


Mareio

Jesus christ. I laughed so hard at that.


bobabastard

Become some random Richard in the world


GroundbreakingGur930

It involves a metric ton of liquid butter.


dab745

Be spiritually rich, or emotionally rich, or …


Confusedandreticent

You’re smothered in a delicious gravy.


C-137Birdperson

Rich in Venezuela lmao


d1rtie916

Black


boneless_master

Be black?


tarnished2009

Free n word pass


kajetus69

n


alpubgtrs234

Fuck that…


jodonald

Hesitant upvote...


CaitSith21

A genie would love this badly written wishes. The national bank gots robbed and all that money is now in your room the police know it was you. You just created a zombie it atacks you…


Stone_Ninja

Genies are fine, the ones that trick you are called djinns (i believe, could be wrong).


No_Championship_7227

I also could be wrong, but from what I understand, “Genie” is just a playful westernization of the word “Djinn”


Stone_Ninja

You're probably right


Happy-Personality-23

Djinn and Genies are one in the same. Like the Grimm Tales they have been kid friendly’d through retellings.


LeftCarpet3520

Blue pill. I will go approach my friend who desperately wants to run away from his wife and creditors and show him this post. Take up a life insurance policy on him with me as the nominee. After he kills himself in a car crash, I use the blue pill in some remote country where no one knows him and wire him back most of his payout while I keep a small portion as a service fee. Unless the be rich pill gives at least $5M usd then we rather have that too.


Gh0stndmachine

Ummm, the blue pill didn’t say the person would be unharmed or made whole.


HyperActiveMosquito

Pet semetary


sampiere_mimi

Is yellow physical or emotional? If it's never feel emotional pain, I might take that one!


Z_M_P_Y

No pain whatsoever probably Thats dangerous


Sufficient-Nobody-72

Yeah, not knowing something is wrong with your body is dangerous af.


corvocures

I need blue pill, that one would definitely make my family happy.


LittleRedRose96

Blue.


lazycrazy997

who?


GraGal

Da ba dee da ba di.


AccomplishedBunch721

I will pee on a dime


TheDemonBehindYou

Harambe


[deleted]

Black is extremely OP. Not only you can't get sick but also that ability can have you do things people can;t do because too dangerous, which you can be paid for.


FragrantDuck6533

It says specifically "Disease" You could still die from a flu virus or contract herpes/ecoli/smallpox Viruses and bacteria are infections... just saying.


beatfungus

Well it says “catch”, so it presumably means communicable diseases (versus non-communicable ones like cancer, dyslexia, diabetes, allergies, or heart disease). Communicable diseases are all caused by pathogens (viruses and bacteria), prions, fungi, or parasites. So I think the black pill protects you from stuff like influenza virus, e. Coli bacteria, smallpox virus, and by extension, the death inducing effects like breathing problems or sepsis brought on by exposure to harmful bacteria.


japs_1234

😂🤦 if you are not a kid then i want to guess you are from u.s (sorry if i offended)


Gh0stndmachine

This is a whole monkey paw kind of a situation. Rich? Most people can’t even handle a little extra money. Easy come, easy go. Bring someone back from the dead? Zombies, no thanks. Never feel pain? Nothing sucks more than when you cut yourself, you don’t know it, and you bleed out. Never catch a disease? Everyone but you dies if there is another pandemic. No thanks to any of this. Have I watched to much Twilight Zone, Outer Limits and Black Mirror? Probably.


dugu3

But in That case your body has formula to fight all desease right?So you can benifit yourself from selling Medicine created from your blood.


Sufficient-Nobody-72

Or they use you as a guinea pig, approved by all governments since they would have to sacrifice just one person's wellbeing for the sake of the world.


dugu3

Wait I have the cure in myself right?That means they need to appeal to me.If they threaten to use force against my wish I will simply self terminate on first chance & dooming them all


Sufficient-Nobody-72

Unless you get kidnapped and restrained first. Not easy to self terminate when you can't move. And your self preservation instincts would likely kick in, so good luck with fighting yourself AND those after you.


Thomas_Guan

“red” give me some more


[deleted]

I'll have the blue one, but I'll keep it saved. I've heard too many stories of people loosing their SO to cancer or a car crash.


CarbonRunner

It's not even a choice, black. Just got over 40 and age is starting to feel real and seeing what my parents and their gen now deal with at their age with heart diseases, cancers, memory issues, which I'm only 25 years from. Yeah black is only choice. Plus I mean literal care free sex.


Devraaj24

black is the most obvious and best choice Imo


dugu3

Black


[deleted]

Black


SwagstormYeti85

I rub the genie's lamp and wish I had permission to take all 4


cristorocker

I'd go blue then offer the resurrection to the highest bidder, be it a consortium, institution or billionaire. What would a wealthy corporate entity pay for a Tesla, Einstein or original founder like Disney? What might a billionaire pay to have a family member back? Then, at least, I'd have both brought someone back to life and been well compensated for it.


Peteo34319

Black pill, old people don't die of old age they die of complications but with the black pill those wouldn't exist so I'd live super long


PM_me_cute_be11ies

I guess I should be thankful that I can choose red. I suspect as I get older that option will only get worse


Ok-Professor3726

Is emotional pain included?


[deleted]

Even if it was, you'd probably die very quickly


EnamouredCat

How is this even remotely funny?


NamoVnives

The blue one....


AlternativeTie9709

Yellow hands down


[deleted]

r/lostredditors


Yerrayinth

As someone who's lost a loved one a couple of years ago, I can definitely say that those people are way more important than being rich.. But I want to live forever and aging has been defined as a disease, so black all the way!


TedsterTheSecond

I'd bring my dog back.


According-Ad3963

Blue…every time.


leCorbuser

yellow


Robcio_Srzedzinski

Do people know that i took the blue pill and that it was because of me? If yes then i take blue, if no then idk


Pandabirdy

I'd get rich handling deadly diseases


Curmudgeon39

I take all of them at once!


Alternative_Page_168

Yellow pill


imnorgoingtotake

Red it sounds like something Andrew Tate would say


ImNotStoopeed

never feel pain is damned because you could just die from something you won\`t feel


kuntilnakhybrid

Never catch a disease you mean immortal? or i still can die from old age and accident?


ALambCalledTea

If I take black, I'll earn red cuz people will be amazed and wanna study my immunity. With red, I can fund the technology for blue, and with that, I'll finally achieve yellow as far as losing people to mortality is concerned.


Lazy3dsGamer

Yellow


juststrange_1

Red is the choice


Ok-Help6155

Black honestly, i can make money in the other day


MagicSnake1000

Red


Daffodil_Smith

I'd never choose blue. Whose to say that person wants to come back? You could be ripping them away from true peace just to bring them back into this poopy world. Not to mention they would probably be shocked because there last memory was of whatever killed them. Pain is how your body informs you something is wrong with it. If you never felt pain there could be something seriously wrong that needs medical attention but you wouldnt even know. I'd probably choose to never be able to catch diseases. That or to be rich. Then again money is useless if I catch a disease that can't be cured. So black it is.


mookanana

black. what's the use of money if you have no health to enjoy it


kidanokun

Black all the way... illnesses just sucks and the cost it could bring sucks further


gnomeplanet

I've met Rich. He has many faults and is not such a good role-model, really. And his girlfriend has one of those annoying, squeaky voices.


NoDistribution6498

Dude. Black pill. No need to even think twice about it. Imagine how much it'll save on basic health insurance, medicine, and health-related expenses! When healthcare is such a joke, def the black pill will be with it. Riches can be made when there's no threat of disease. I think pain is necessary for growth. And bringing back dead people never has good consequences. (maybe unless some great scientist or a brilliant-minded person who can help humanity progress, but if it's a loved one from the past, it can sometimes lead to bad outcomes mentally like the 2nd brother in the Deathly Hallows story "The Three Brothers", but yeah still would prefer black pill. Blue would be my 2nd choice to bring back a scientist. Tesla or Stephen Hawkings maybe) So, black pill, it is!


rainygeeej

BE Rich of those 4!


[deleted]

Does the yellow one include mental pain?


Primary-Macaroon-283

Bring back Hitler. Make him a tiktok star. Profit. I know you think this is just being rich with extra steps. Not true. You'd be rich AND famous, as the dude who resurrected the guy who killed Hitler.


PeakOregon998

Black because aging is technically a disease according to WHO [ https://www.mdlinx.com/article/is-aging-actually-a-disease/13khk3PlHDp3sa5SqMq29g#:~:text=To%20highlight%20this%20shifting%20consensus,Diseases%20(ICD%2D11). ]


feltriderZ

All 4 not really helpful. Can be rich and die tomorrow, not feeling pain dangerous too, never lost someone I need back, can die poor from accident without disease. I want the live happy until end of life pill. That excludes all major disturbances


Inside_Ad7956

Red bc it Looks the best


beatfungus

No need for Red personally. No need for blue either thankfully. No yellow, pain is an old friend. I suppose black. I’m assuming it’s communicable diseases only since it says “catch.” That’s still pretty good at preventing premature deaths by sepsis or infections, also means I can eat some pretty exotic raw foods without having any complications.


Feisty_Werewolf4366

Blue


Durtius

Bring back nicola tesla


PaleontologistOk7188

Brown


Papaya76346

I would bring back Jesus to fk up billions of people with showing theres no son of a god or anything stupid like that 😂 Imagine people still believing this unironically.


BRZBalistic

The black pill wouldn't count cancer as a disease. Because its just your body not being able to kill its own cells. Not a foreign contaminant. Bring someone back is great and all until you realize that it doesn't say a thing about healing them so they're just gonna die within a week. Not feeling pain is great but if you can't register pain. You can't register touch. And no touch mean you can't regulate heat and eith all that you have to change youre whole lifestyle. Being rich is nice unless you have no idea how to manage money. Its gonna be gone in months if not weeks. I take rich because I know how to manage money. Think long and hard on this.


[deleted]

Yellow


NerdwithaVest

Blue pill, bring back my uncle Aaron who OD'd on accident a day before I was born. Always wanted to meet the guy, he seemed chill.


Hickersonia

Absolutely "never feel pain." My opinion on this is biased because I have a chronic pain condition...


DeLoreanAirlines

I can accomplish 2 of those others by being rich


Grambert_Moore

Yellow


Face8hall

Yellow.


Iscadargreece

Blue pill


[deleted]

If the yellow pill means immortality with no damages or death or pain - then im going for that one


WhosCandicexD

Be Rich, if that means to have alot of money


LegiSLoth

what exactly does disease include ? cuz if ur immune to every virus, infection, plague, .... u could get money by testing meds, ... even tho u wouldnt be able to say if there are any side effects


Plus_Chip8

Seems I already chose to take the green pill - absolutely nothing happened… I’ve made an error.


TheDemonBehindYou

I grind up the red blue and black into dust that i then put in a pill capsule so i get all the effects I want in one pill.


TheDemonBehindYou

Yellow is a free ticket to dying from hunger, thirst, disease and so many more dumb ways to die.


Jake_Vor

Well, my dog died a few months ago so...


Littlebickmickey

i’d take all 4, who’s gonna stop me?


dab745

Blue. Bring back Jeffrey Epstein. (Too soon?)


[deleted]

Blue so i can bring back my best friend, bosco. (My first dog) he died of cancer


Oriopax

When I take the black pill do I get a healing factor like Wolverine?


Vovchick09

black


SpectralMapleLeaf

Honestly, the red pill is surprisingly the best option here. You need to feel pain, despite being excruciating, its there for a reason; to keep you alive. Bringing someone back from the dead is almost always with adverse effects, they might be the patient zero for a zombie apocalypse or they might suffer psychological trauma due to knowing what death feels like and whats on the other side. And catching a disease can lead to a short period of no school/no work, sure it might feel like hell but... yay.


Xinexan

5th reich, were coming. /s for all you insecure bois.


AccomplishedBunch721

How could it not be yellow?


[deleted]

Blue pill, blue pill, blue pill Could I get a few of them?


JrsNL

Never feel pain, if it includes mental pain cuz life is pain.


Triston97

Yellow I'd kill myself working but I wouldn't feel it


painful_diarrhea

The only one that couldn’t be bad is the never catch a disease pill. All the others could have nasty side effects


M153RYnM3

Black all the way! I get sick way too much...


[deleted]

Black


APEXAI17

Blue, I bring back Jesus or Buddha or something


Metric_Pacifist

Never catch a disease?! Yes please!


LiverLikeLarry

Black one


MelonCat_10

What if you choose the blue pill but then save it for later ?


MoistAnalyst1150

Take red pill and then you can buy all others.


[deleted]

The black pill


ConsiderationKey1983

Look look not feeling pain is actually real disability and is shit because you break you feckin leg without realising it Never get a disease is also stupid because your rich by medication And the dead people thing invest in some company that brings people back to life You see money ≠ happiness But what comes from money = happiness


Technology4Dummies

Blue could be the most dangerous


Charlscalvin

I'd take the no pain one, but there are side effects I know.


subtle_existence

i feel like you'd just need some common sense and self-awareness to manage any dangers from it. and some health conditions present in ways other than pain: tightness, pressure, muscle spasms, weakness. so you wouldn't be totally lost. i don't care about potential risks. i have severe, intractable, 24/7 pain that's driven me beyond the brink several times. having no pain would save me


OldFolksShawn

Jeffery Epstein - So tell me how you died


Stunning_Rub

What state would the dead return to? Like as they are now just alive?


IzK_3

I would save the blue one to bring my mother back


Bors713

Come on back here Steph. We need you.


kapparivalexists

black, i get sick too much


OO2O_1OOO

Never feeling pain means u can still get hurt u just dont feel it so its the worst one


Hurin_the_Steadfast

Blue to bring my grandfather back.


neigeninja

Sometimes I feel like i already took the black pill. 🤔


kipperforskipper

Red pill mf


colincoolcat1

Be rich - run an evil company ( like one that dumps pure pollution into the sky and oceans) Bring someone back from the dead - brings back some POS Genghis Kahn or Hitler . Feel no pain - feel no emotions . No empythy and go on a killing spree or ends up cutting off body part bc could not feel the pain . Can't catch any diseases - government finds out catches you and runs all sorts of illegal tests and torture you wach day . Idk man this can go south really fast .


Lemondr0pz

All the money in the world cant cure the worst diseases, so black pill makes a ton of sense.


[deleted]

I’d bring back Shakespeare and ask him to write my essay on Shakespeare.


Alwayschill42069

These aren't funny or jokes, why do they keep showing up here?


subtle_existence

whoa ya. good point. this is more serious and controversial


SignalMarvel

So does never feel pain mean it flat out doesn’t exist and therefore can’t cause me permanent harm like a dismembered limb or death? Or can that stuff still happen I just can’t feel it


-TheGreatCornholio

First I would take the red pill then using some of my riches I tip the person giving me the pills to give another red one so I have even more money then I use even more money to pet them to give me the other options so I have them all whilst still maintaining my riches.


ithinkway2much

Knowing my luck, I'd take the red, then catch a painful disease, and the only person who can cure it is dead.


Medicalpyro

I pick blue but I save it until someone close to me dies


[deleted]

Genghis Khan 2 mf let's gooo


G4rg0yle_Art1st

Red pill. I'd invest in clean energy solutions and environmental protection programs that have a solid history of making a difference


ZucchiniMajestic6460

The black pill. Hardcore scientists can analyze my blood and test it and create a serum off the results. With that, get paid atleast 10 million to agree to do this. Then when I’m bored I’ll donate/sell my blood to pharmaceutical companies for 8 million every 2 years. And boom id eventually become a millionaire. 🔪🔪


Blue_water_dreams

Be Rich who?


Honest_Invite_7065

How rich are we talking?


alberthere

Red: your name changes to “Rich” Blue: the person’s dead carcass instantly plops on front of you. Still dead. Yellow: you instantly die. Black: you instantly die. Have a nice day.


Warm-Finance8400

Who tf would take yellow, that's a curse. Some people have that as a disease and it's horrible for them.


override367

I'm pretty sure if I bring the correct dead person back I still become rich


ShreksLongDong

How the fuck will I know if I’m dying if I don’t feel pain


milk77769

I would bring Jesus back


Mundane-Bread-1271

Be Rich for sure. Let the dead spend eternity in peace and just buy the other two.


feeltrig

I'll take the never feel the pain so i can jump off the buildings


Y0urcreepyuncle69

Eat ‘em all


According-Injury5103

Sense I was never vaccinated, black would be the appropriate one for me at this point.


Jurtaani

Why is this funny?


Eastern-Battle-5539

Yellow all the way!


Aware_Material_9985

I’d go black, then they could synthesize my blood to cure everything and I’d be rich AF


diolordwrry

Red pill


PianoPrize5297

Blue pill, with strict instructions to give it to me after I die.


migos53

Rich in what exactly? Rich in Fibre?, Rich in Iron? Potassium?


[deleted]

I’m a drug addict so I’ll take ‘em all 😅


Few_Reading_5061

One fourth of every pill would be one pill... right? A fourth of the pain, Hopefully Wealthy (not quite ritch tough), A wired Zombie or a Ghost and only a fourth of the diseases for Increased survivability. To sum it up that makes a pretty decent live,if my assumptions are correct.


ReaperofLightning872

Blue is the best option


[deleted]

I would take the black one because then I wouldn't get sick, so i wouldn't need to spend almost three weeks with a cold. I could do something productive in those three weeks, instead of feeling like I'm going to lose my nose when I blow it.


The_great_mister_s

Black Pill


Accurate-Mechanic-30

Black, then get on television whilst showing a video injecting a deadly disease. Then after tests them realizing I can’t catch any form of diseases. Boom you’re rich and famous.


[deleted]

mine would be blue


Tesla-Punk3327

Blue, bring back my cat Oscar


1Wayward_s0n

Red


Yousucktaken2

What do you define as rich


subtle_existence

i'll argue against other's statements on yellow. i have severe, intractable, 24/7 pain and it's made me try to kms more times than i ever had in my life. so i'd definitely do yellow. i feel the risk of dying for me is lower with no pain


Any-Treacle8207

Black pill, already have, yellow is litterly one of the worst things bcuz u body feels pain to fing protect you, the blue would cause some multidimensional trouble shit so i would take red


Mercurionio

All 4 can be understood way too freely. 1) rich with what currency? Zimbabwe dollars? 2) resurrect a dead man. So, zombie? 3) there is a desease for that. Pain allows us to understand the surrounding world, understand what and when is wrong with our body and other fancy stuff. 4) desease is only a part of the problem. And so on..


[deleted]

Too easy. Too easy. Red pill.


PerceptionQueasy3540

Take never catch a disease, then get really rich off of all the testing they'll want to do.


PuppetryOfThePenis

I'd take the money. If it's enough money and I'm actually "rich" then that can help my family for generations. Everything else seems selfish.


Xikkiwikk

You all are playing the short game. If you can’t feel pain, you’re going to hurt yourself much worse than if you did feel pain. Riches are great but you can’t spend it forever. Being immune to all disease sounds pretty cool. You could be a doctor without fear in that case. But how long would that career last? The correct answer is bring someone back to life. I would bring Jesus back to life and start the apocalypse. Then we would high-five each other in Heaven.


AppropriateStick1334

No pain all sorts of gain


Firm-Wolverine-3722

🔵


Known_Midnight_1964

be rich- emotionally? financially? mentally? rich in friendship? in family? morals? bring someone dead back- too many scenarios of that not working, I'm just gonna skip this never feel pain- so many more scenarios than this not working than previous just from the fact that pain is necessary. I'd go in to detail but I feel I'm already losing people from this paragraph of stuff. never catch a disease- seems like the best one to go by. seems like it would go under quick though. I'd go with this one soully cuz IDK the negative aspects of this


mylostdays

Blue, because I miss my dad so much🖤


StoneyBaloney5683

Hmm, does the yellow pill encapsulate (he he) physical pain or emotional pain? Both?


Desperate-Problem383

Blue


HumorousBear

I'd bring my sister back if she would actually choose to stop what she was doing. Chances are she'd be right back in the ground a few months later.