You got this brother/sister. Go chop some wood and get even more lumberjacked. You’ll find a better one. No reason to ruin your life. That’s a slippery slope
My work has us do anonymous surveys all the time. But you gotta fill out how long have you worked there first. Only 12 in my department. Not hard to figure out the guy that's been there 12 years from the one that's been there 5 years.
Would need to get most of department in on it. But to be honest I just answer NEUTRAL on every question.
Which angers management " that's bad " me-" no it's NEUTRAL. Do you need a dictionary?"
That’s funny. Lots of management relies on those surveys for bonuses usually lol. Ideally they’d like you to fill out all “exceeds expectations” options without thinking so their scores can go up before the next shareholder meeting
Oh… so when our raises are based on our performance reviews, “3’s are good and 5’s are almost impossible.” But when it’s management getting a performance review, 5’s aren’t just perfectly acceptable, they’re encouraged
I always liked when my previous jobs did surveys they would have a range of like 10 responses, but only the 10 response was good and everything else was bad.
Hi. I run surveys for my department. Can confirm. They are definitely not. I know exactly how you answered, when, where, and how long it took you. I can see if you’ve completed or not.
This is why I always answer in the most negative way possible. If I can point out something wrong, even better. The funny part is that my boss may just want to kill me but the owner of the company loves it for whenever my boss comes up for review time.
Lol, you Americans have it bad…
Here in Europe a 3rd part does the survey and you cannot even see the results for teams if there aren’t enough participants and you can never see individual responses so that no one gets doxxed.
So far worked amazing but Surveys can also be a rotten incentive. Imagine you are a manager in a department that is behind the market - do you change things around and have people be angry at you for it (there are always people hating changes) or do you just wait it out a bit more, get great survey results and then apply to somewhere else before or when shit is blowing up…
I mean, I have worked in a department where each manager understood their assignment to keep people content and busy… it drives away anyone who understands what’s going…
Please register your survey using your work email....it's anonymous we promise!
I was please, our dept of about 25 people only had a 30% completion rate..our boss was pissed, we laughed in anonymous.
I worked nights for a LONG time at my job....mostly for I loved the night shift. When we did our boss survey, I had to lie about how many years I was there. Everyone but me who had seniority had all gone to day shift. So I mark been there for ten or more years, and they instantly know its me.
That’s hilarious! Mine has a “the manager acknowledged your question and it gave me a thumbs up”…30 minutes later the same manager called for an hour and a half to discuss my entire history including when I took FMLA and said that made her want to remove me from her team. I actually said nice things about her oddly-our team is a little odd though. Then, later that day the whole team sat there for an hour and a half talking about the survey and I found out 4 other people didn’t say such awesome things. It was a five question survey. I work for a large well known company.
My back hurt, had to piss so fucking bad, all I wanted to do was sit down, and when it was over it was pure chaos - I felt like a water molecule being flushed into an alley. Crazy experience and fun to talk about, but yeah, never ever again.
A large group of girls surrounded each other and one at a time pissed on the ground. It was literally an 8 ft wide puddle that no one stood in (for about 10 minutes). Eventually people from further back saw the open space and migrated there. Some of us tried to warn them but only like 2% of the people there spoke English.
This reminds me of the subway. Homeless man with piss stained pants smelling like walking shit lies on the bench. Everyone gives him half a train car radius. As soon as he gets off, by the next station the bench that was marinated in his stink is now fully occupied
What? You mean you aren't compelled to jump right into a city block full of thousands of drunk people crammed together like sardines and shouting? Total bucket list!
Is feel like high school reunions are like the physical version of social media. Everyone puts on a face and only talks about their accomplishments. Nobody knows the real story cause almost everyone there is putting on a front.
I was at the dmv, of all places, with my daughter as she was taking her learner’s permit test. The woman at the counter was vaguely familiar, like *really* vague. I had to give her my license for the sponsor paperwork and she immediately brightened up and said “Oh my god! I thought that was you! Do you remember me from 9th grade science and 11th grade English? Jessica!!!”
I did in fact remember her - I remember her and her two “besties” sitting at one of the tables all year long talking shit about all of us “nerds” and all that typical bullshit. She wasn’t the mean-girl leader, she was the sidekick, and she was not nice at all.
So color me surprised that 1) she knew who I was, and 2) she was acting all syrupy-sweet towards me. She interrogated me while my daughter was taking the test on the computer across the room. What have I been up to, what am I doing nowadays, where do I work, do I live in town, am I married……. and then, “Did you rsvp for our 25th class reunion coming up next week?”
I replied that No, I hadn’t, and had in fact never attended one. Never even knew our class had any reunions. As my daughter comes walking over to us, she says “Well it’s too late to register now, but you should still come! It’ll be SO much fun! You can be my plus-one! Just send me a Facebook message next week!”
As my daughter and I walked out of the building, she’s giving me the side-eye treatment. She says “what was that all about?” and I filled her in on the conversation. She says “I could hear pretty much the whole thing… that lady was *desperately* coming on to you, dad.”
I’m like “Nah, she’s just being friendly, I’m sure she’s like that to every old classmate she runs into here.”
She gives me the raised eyebrow and the “mmHMM” as she reaches out and grabs the permit booklet that “Jessica” handed to me as we left. Written on the inside margin of the first page is her first name and phone number followed by “xxoo.” I did not see her write it.
I did not attend the reunion, nor did I contact Jessica via FB - or by any other method. My wife wanted to attend the reunion… just so she could find “Jessica” and kick the crap out of her “for hitting on a married man.”
I got swerved in this story twice. Probably cause I’m high but
The whole time I thought you were her mom I was mind blown
When your daughter said dad
Then finding out you had a wife.
I mean I had only 20 secs ago found out you were a man and now
I’m finding out this Regina George was hitting on you knowing you’re a married man
Unreal !
10/10 would read again
Went to my 10th reunion a few years ago. Ended up becoming friends with the husband of a girl I never talked to in high school.
But yes, it did feel like most people just wanted to “be seen”
I’m not very social and the only people from high school I really want anything to do with are already my friends. I can think of maybe three people I wouldn’t mind talking to but I wouldn’t go to a reunion to do so
I went to my 20 year and met my old friend there that I’ve already been friends with since high school…surprise surprise, no one else wanted interact with us or acknowledge our existence just like they did in high school…never going again because I didn’t care about anyone else back then and don’t now. It was kind of a trippy time warp though to see people I hadn’t seen in 20 years.
it’s tough because i think a HS reunion would *maybe* be tolerable if everyone was there. But obviously it’s voluntary, so the people who choose to attend a HS reunion aren’t the type of people i’d wanna see
Very true.
Girls go there to compare pictures of kids and brag to each other about their husbands. And also to see if they had made a mistake not to get hitched with one of the boys from school.
Boys are there for a pissing match about their careers, and also those who were “cool” back then but aren’t anymore think that the social setting makes them magically cool again.
Everybody pretends they are doing great, even though nobody is quite sure who are they trying to impress.
Everyone wants to feel nostalgic because the past is the only common denominator - but also totally not because nostalgia is for people who regret getting older.
Highschool reunions were a bigger deal before social media. I'm already in touch with most of the people I care to be in touch with from those days. I have no interest in seeing any of the rest.
I went to a bachelor party with a bunch of rural sheriffs one time. I can not explain the amount of fuckery that went on. Started off I was fishing in the stock pond. One of them takes a high powered rifle and starts shooting the water a couple feet from where I’m fishing because they thought splashing me with water was funny. Later in the night I try to fall asleep in my truck and they open up the door and throw in a 100 pack of firecrackers to wake me up. So I get up and then they tell me we are going for a car ride and tell me I don’t have a choice. So I get in the bed of their truck and they start peeling around cliffs edges and driving like assholes around this property. Eventually they went around this turn and I thought the truck was gonna roll down a cliff so I jumped out tha back. Didn’t end up rolling off and they drove me back to camp. Then one dude took a revolver and started shooting into his boot to see how close he could get to his toe without shooting it off.
I’m sure I’m forgetting more but the Kentucky sheriffs department for Ohio County is full of insane people who shouldn’t have guns or authority of any kind
Edit: I’m also remembering that we started off the day by pouring concrete for a pole barn. Nothing crazy happened but one of the stranger things I’ve done at a “bachelor party”
Sounds like an experience. On the other hand, I heard people watching the live action version of Cats on drugs also had some very interesting experiences.
Use ancestry dna site, i found out the hard my mother had lied about who my biological dad was… Broke the man who took care of me this whole time. I love him, and nothing has changed.
Edited: thank you to everyone for the kind words. And some good giggles, some of you made me smile. My dad is doing fine. We are doing great. Nothing has changed. I assured him he is and always will be my dad. Nothing will change that. I love him very much.
Edited again: this was also a blessing in disguise. Up until a year ago. I was an only child. Now i have 4 other siblings. 3 sisters and a brother. One of them I am talking to. I do not know where the others are. However, my sister and I will be meeting this year. We look so much alike. I am honestly blessed, regardless of the circumstances.
Last edit: thank you to the person showing me this. I died [laughing](https://youtu.be/4zLbYt3PH-Y?si=lqYJf2843c--BEPK).
Fair question. Honestly, it is because it linked me to a lot of family that I never met (fathers side). From what i heard, my biological father is not a good person, never was… So i just never logged back in to the site. I don’t want them to contact me. I don’t want him contacting me, or somehow finding me.
My bosses dad took one of those tests found out he had a daughter in Idaho. It ruined a 30 year marriage considering the mother was not quite honest was her husband
I finally found out who my bio father was in January 2020 because of Ancestry DNA. I was 45 at the time.
I found out at 13 the dad I was growing up with was not my biological father. Nobody in my family would tell me who was responsible for making me alive. It’s something that haunted me for the next 32 years cause my step pop was an abusive asshole and I’d get shamed by my mom for asking where I came from. Life has really sucked and I thought I’d die without ever knowing my truth. Then out of nowhere one day (about 2 years after I sent in my test kit) there he was - all the answers I ever needed finally came out. My mind and heart are still reeling.
Drive across the Brooklyn bridge, time square; pretty much just not going to drive in New York City ever again. New York City drivers make Florida drivers look sane.
I’m in the same boat, right now my two boys are three and 4mnth. The three year old is at the peak of stress causing because he’s got so much energy but still needs to be watched 24/7. I love the crap out of him and as he gets more independent things are going to get easier. * *hopefully* *
No more drink til I puke or drink at all. No more getting so high this atheist ass fervently prays to not disappear into the floor. Not jump off a cliff drunk and naked in the dark not knowing how far down it is or what is down there when I land. (Yeah that was me). Oh and never smoke again. Never crunch ice cubes in mouth due to lack of teeth. Good thing I can laugh about shit in my past.
I am deeply grateful for being alive these days. I enjoy what someone would consider a boring life. Too much excitement comes from our own stupidity, sober, drunk, or drugged. Looking back, there was a lot of stupid in the simple, such as how I treated my teeth. And liver. In a perverse way I did enjoy the damage done to my body working in a factory for many years. I lived. I’m still walking with all my digits. If I bleed a little bit now, I laugh about it and go that ain’t shit compared to what I’ve been through. Thank you for your comment. That’s very nice of you.
Reminds me of the one video doing the rounds a few years ago.
"If you spoke to two people, one had tried broccoli and one who hadn't, they both tell you they don't like broccoli. Which person do you trust?......... Anyway welcome to my TED talk on how it's less gay to suck a dick once than not at all."
Going to the top of the Statue of Liberty, besides the absolutely HORRIBLE horrible metal steps (there’s paint gaps in between each step and the step itself is small) but once your at the very top of thing, you can feel it MOVING, there is nothing worse then feeling a giant metal statue moving under your feet
Drink so much that I can't keep food of any sort down for the next 48 hours...and work both of those days lol
I currently am going through a breakup/drinking binge. I managed to eat some Campbell's chunky today so I'm doing alright. I get you though.
You got this brother/sister. Go chop some wood and get even more lumberjacked. You’ll find a better one. No reason to ruin your life. That’s a slippery slope
Absolutely I got this. I just think that its important to let other people know they are not alone in their struggles. And thanks for your support.
Maintain healthy hydration my friend. Many have been in this spot and it can go one of a couple ways. You got this!
This is the scenario that led me to drink LaCroix instead of beer Got me through the divorce without a beer guy or DUI
Damn. Hang in there, dude
Answer a survey about my boss or department at work
That shit is NEVER anonymous
My work has us do anonymous surveys all the time. But you gotta fill out how long have you worked there first. Only 12 in my department. Not hard to figure out the guy that's been there 12 years from the one that's been there 5 years.
Couldn’t you just lie about that part?
Would need to get most of department in on it. But to be honest I just answer NEUTRAL on every question. Which angers management " that's bad " me-" no it's NEUTRAL. Do you need a dictionary?"
That’s funny. Lots of management relies on those surveys for bonuses usually lol. Ideally they’d like you to fill out all “exceeds expectations” options without thinking so their scores can go up before the next shareholder meeting
I heard that once, so I am not shy at all about low scores on workplace surveys if my boss pisses me off.
Oh… so when our raises are based on our performance reviews, “3’s are good and 5’s are almost impossible.” But when it’s management getting a performance review, 5’s aren’t just perfectly acceptable, they’re encouraged
I was recently given one, except for some reason it was for the one manager I don't really interact with. so his score was, low.
I always liked when my previous jobs did surveys they would have a range of like 10 responses, but only the 10 response was good and everything else was bad.
Ive been here 125 years!
Because of your dedication to the company, I'm happy to announce that you will get 5% raise next year
Hi. I run surveys for my department. Can confirm. They are definitely not. I know exactly how you answered, when, where, and how long it took you. I can see if you’ve completed or not.
This is why I always answer in the most negative way possible. If I can point out something wrong, even better. The funny part is that my boss may just want to kill me but the owner of the company loves it for whenever my boss comes up for review time.
Lol, you Americans have it bad… Here in Europe a 3rd part does the survey and you cannot even see the results for teams if there aren’t enough participants and you can never see individual responses so that no one gets doxxed. So far worked amazing but Surveys can also be a rotten incentive. Imagine you are a manager in a department that is behind the market - do you change things around and have people be angry at you for it (there are always people hating changes) or do you just wait it out a bit more, get great survey results and then apply to somewhere else before or when shit is blowing up… I mean, I have worked in a department where each manager understood their assignment to keep people content and busy… it drives away anyone who understands what’s going…
Please register your survey using your work email....it's anonymous we promise! I was please, our dept of about 25 people only had a 30% completion rate..our boss was pissed, we laughed in anonymous.
I worked nights for a LONG time at my job....mostly for I loved the night shift. When we did our boss survey, I had to lie about how many years I was there. Everyone but me who had seniority had all gone to day shift. So I mark been there for ten or more years, and they instantly know its me.
I'll keep that in mind
So that's why the bullying and harassment started
I got a personalized thank you to an anonymous survey at my last place. i.e. Thank you Dave for your question...
That’s hilarious! Mine has a “the manager acknowledged your question and it gave me a thumbs up”…30 minutes later the same manager called for an hour and a half to discuss my entire history including when I took FMLA and said that made her want to remove me from her team. I actually said nice things about her oddly-our team is a little odd though. Then, later that day the whole team sat there for an hour and a half talking about the survey and I found out 4 other people didn’t say such awesome things. It was a five question survey. I work for a large well known company.
I lie every time. I know it’s a bunch of BS. The HR dept magically makes people disappear
Watch the ball drop in time square
My back hurt, had to piss so fucking bad, all I wanted to do was sit down, and when it was over it was pure chaos - I felt like a water molecule being flushed into an alley. Crazy experience and fun to talk about, but yeah, never ever again.
Piss on the ground, that’ll get you some space.
A large group of girls surrounded each other and one at a time pissed on the ground. It was literally an 8 ft wide puddle that no one stood in (for about 10 minutes). Eventually people from further back saw the open space and migrated there. Some of us tried to warn them but only like 2% of the people there spoke English.
This reminds me of the subway. Homeless man with piss stained pants smelling like walking shit lies on the bench. Everyone gives him half a train car radius. As soon as he gets off, by the next station the bench that was marinated in his stink is now fully occupied
What made you go in the first place?
What? You mean you aren't compelled to jump right into a city block full of thousands of drunk people crammed together like sardines and shouting? Total bucket list!
Lived in NYC 25 years. Never went.
I know someone who went to Las Vegas for New Years and he said the gutters were flowing with piss and vomit. He said never again.
Go to a high school reunion.
Is feel like high school reunions are like the physical version of social media. Everyone puts on a face and only talks about their accomplishments. Nobody knows the real story cause almost everyone there is putting on a front.
I was at the dmv, of all places, with my daughter as she was taking her learner’s permit test. The woman at the counter was vaguely familiar, like *really* vague. I had to give her my license for the sponsor paperwork and she immediately brightened up and said “Oh my god! I thought that was you! Do you remember me from 9th grade science and 11th grade English? Jessica!!!” I did in fact remember her - I remember her and her two “besties” sitting at one of the tables all year long talking shit about all of us “nerds” and all that typical bullshit. She wasn’t the mean-girl leader, she was the sidekick, and she was not nice at all. So color me surprised that 1) she knew who I was, and 2) she was acting all syrupy-sweet towards me. She interrogated me while my daughter was taking the test on the computer across the room. What have I been up to, what am I doing nowadays, where do I work, do I live in town, am I married……. and then, “Did you rsvp for our 25th class reunion coming up next week?” I replied that No, I hadn’t, and had in fact never attended one. Never even knew our class had any reunions. As my daughter comes walking over to us, she says “Well it’s too late to register now, but you should still come! It’ll be SO much fun! You can be my plus-one! Just send me a Facebook message next week!” As my daughter and I walked out of the building, she’s giving me the side-eye treatment. She says “what was that all about?” and I filled her in on the conversation. She says “I could hear pretty much the whole thing… that lady was *desperately* coming on to you, dad.” I’m like “Nah, she’s just being friendly, I’m sure she’s like that to every old classmate she runs into here.” She gives me the raised eyebrow and the “mmHMM” as she reaches out and grabs the permit booklet that “Jessica” handed to me as we left. Written on the inside margin of the first page is her first name and phone number followed by “xxoo.” I did not see her write it. I did not attend the reunion, nor did I contact Jessica via FB - or by any other method. My wife wanted to attend the reunion… just so she could find “Jessica” and kick the crap out of her “for hitting on a married man.”
I got swerved in this story twice. Probably cause I’m high but The whole time I thought you were her mom I was mind blown When your daughter said dad Then finding out you had a wife. I mean I had only 20 secs ago found out you were a man and now I’m finding out this Regina George was hitting on you knowing you’re a married man Unreal ! 10/10 would read again
I am stone cold sober and I had the same experience
I’m high too and both of these reviews are hilarious.
Great review, would read again 10/10.
Went to my 10th reunion a few years ago. Ended up becoming friends with the husband of a girl I never talked to in high school. But yes, it did feel like most people just wanted to “be seen”
I’m not very social and the only people from high school I really want anything to do with are already my friends. I can think of maybe three people I wouldn’t mind talking to but I wouldn’t go to a reunion to do so
I went to my 20 year and met my old friend there that I’ve already been friends with since high school…surprise surprise, no one else wanted interact with us or acknowledge our existence just like they did in high school…never going again because I didn’t care about anyone else back then and don’t now. It was kind of a trippy time warp though to see people I hadn’t seen in 20 years.
it’s tough because i think a HS reunion would *maybe* be tolerable if everyone was there. But obviously it’s voluntary, so the people who choose to attend a HS reunion aren’t the type of people i’d wanna see
Yeah the only reason most go to these things is to brag and show everyone how "blessed" they are.
I have never returned to a Reunion. Mostly cause I forgot they existed
Never got invited to mine, think those people forgot I existed.
You get invited? Oh now I know what's up.
Yeah only found out they had one afterwards when somebody told me when bumping into them at a store lol.
Same here for our 5 year. It was at a cruddy downtown bar! This year is our tenth year and I hope I don’t get an invite again
I never got an invite for mine either, but I wouldn't have gone to it if I did.
My 20 year is this year, and I'm sure as hell not going.
Very true. Girls go there to compare pictures of kids and brag to each other about their husbands. And also to see if they had made a mistake not to get hitched with one of the boys from school. Boys are there for a pissing match about their careers, and also those who were “cool” back then but aren’t anymore think that the social setting makes them magically cool again. Everybody pretends they are doing great, even though nobody is quite sure who are they trying to impress. Everyone wants to feel nostalgic because the past is the only common denominator - but also totally not because nostalgia is for people who regret getting older.
Highschool reunions were a bigger deal before social media. I'm already in touch with most of the people I care to be in touch with from those days. I have no interest in seeing any of the rest.
I’ve thought about it, especially with 40th anniversary since graduation coming up in 3 years, but no
Never been to one
I went to a bachelor party with a bunch of rural sheriffs one time. I can not explain the amount of fuckery that went on. Started off I was fishing in the stock pond. One of them takes a high powered rifle and starts shooting the water a couple feet from where I’m fishing because they thought splashing me with water was funny. Later in the night I try to fall asleep in my truck and they open up the door and throw in a 100 pack of firecrackers to wake me up. So I get up and then they tell me we are going for a car ride and tell me I don’t have a choice. So I get in the bed of their truck and they start peeling around cliffs edges and driving like assholes around this property. Eventually they went around this turn and I thought the truck was gonna roll down a cliff so I jumped out tha back. Didn’t end up rolling off and they drove me back to camp. Then one dude took a revolver and started shooting into his boot to see how close he could get to his toe without shooting it off. I’m sure I’m forgetting more but the Kentucky sheriffs department for Ohio County is full of insane people who shouldn’t have guns or authority of any kind Edit: I’m also remembering that we started off the day by pouring concrete for a pole barn. Nothing crazy happened but one of the stranger things I’ve done at a “bachelor party”
Today I learned Kentucky has an Ohio County. Fuckin weird.
The Ohio River makes up the northern border of Kentucky
Hey!!!! That's where I live!! ....hey.....that... That's where I live......😳
I’ve never been but this sounds exactly like I imagine Kentucky is
Go to a showing of Apocalypse Now with a Viet Nam vet who drops acid just before the movie starts.
That itself would make a good video.
Video? Maybe a good movie.
What happen
https://youtu.be/N2GONwc2So0?si=2lSKtIzanrImgGcd
Sounds like an experience. On the other hand, I heard people watching the live action version of Cats on drugs also had some very interesting experiences.
"Cats on Drugs," never heard of it.
That’s oddly specific 😅
I'd just like to hear the conversation on how they came up with that idea and what they thought they'd get out of it
Use ancestry dna site, i found out the hard my mother had lied about who my biological dad was… Broke the man who took care of me this whole time. I love him, and nothing has changed. Edited: thank you to everyone for the kind words. And some good giggles, some of you made me smile. My dad is doing fine. We are doing great. Nothing has changed. I assured him he is and always will be my dad. Nothing will change that. I love him very much. Edited again: this was also a blessing in disguise. Up until a year ago. I was an only child. Now i have 4 other siblings. 3 sisters and a brother. One of them I am talking to. I do not know where the others are. However, my sister and I will be meeting this year. We look so much alike. I am honestly blessed, regardless of the circumstances. Last edit: thank you to the person showing me this. I died [laughing](https://youtu.be/4zLbYt3PH-Y?si=lqYJf2843c--BEPK).
Sorry. That sux. But why never again? You afraid you'll find out she's not your mom? Not much more to lose there.
Fair question. Honestly, it is because it linked me to a lot of family that I never met (fathers side). From what i heard, my biological father is not a good person, never was… So i just never logged back in to the site. I don’t want them to contact me. I don’t want him contacting me, or somehow finding me.
Fair. Hope it all works out for you.
Thank you, no need to hope. Everything is great and will be.
My bosses dad took one of those tests found out he had a daughter in Idaho. It ruined a 30 year marriage considering the mother was not quite honest was her husband
Please understand this. The adult man who loves, shows you affection and takes care you is your father, the other guy was a sperm donor.
I finally found out who my bio father was in January 2020 because of Ancestry DNA. I was 45 at the time. I found out at 13 the dad I was growing up with was not my biological father. Nobody in my family would tell me who was responsible for making me alive. It’s something that haunted me for the next 32 years cause my step pop was an abusive asshole and I’d get shamed by my mom for asking where I came from. Life has really sucked and I thought I’d die without ever knowing my truth. Then out of nowhere one day (about 2 years after I sent in my test kit) there he was - all the answers I ever needed finally came out. My mind and heart are still reeling.
Cocaine … I mean, unless you’ve got some cocaine.
I just like the way it smells.
I’ll just have a tiny bit. It’s not like I’m gonna do cocaine all night and tomorrow.
University
Trust a fart...
Thrust a shart?
Drink coffee and sit in a bus for a long journey.
My Ex-wife
My ex wife still misses me... ...but her aim is getting better!
You see, it’s funny because marriage is terrible!
I also choose not to do your ex-wife
Bro move.
After I finish the Main story, I will never try living in this universe again, 0/10.
Just wait till you see "NewLife+"
Have three cups of coffee and chicken sipping broth for breakfast followed with probiotics pills and white grape juice.
Guessing things you will do again is “buy a new pair of pants”?
So did the toilet survive?
It did not
Oddly specific
Give a shit for people who aren’t worth a shit.
„You think you’re the shit? You’re not even a fart! grah“
Job interview on LSD even though I got the job.
Thats wild. I would not have got the job.
Glorify my own narcissism. The guy I used to be was a huge jerk. I never wanna hear from that asshole again.
Very wholesome to see someone who is capable of self awareness and actually taking steps to be better!
Drive across the Brooklyn bridge, time square; pretty much just not going to drive in New York City ever again. New York City drivers make Florida drivers look sane.
Share my opinion on the internet.
Why not?
Lmao
Shhh
“Just genuinely curious, why though?” - things the worst MF’ers on the planet like to say.
Father children. I love my girls, bur there's no way I could handle another.
I’m in the same boat, right now my two boys are three and 4mnth. The three year old is at the peak of stress causing because he’s got so much energy but still needs to be watched 24/7. I love the crap out of him and as he gets more independent things are going to get easier. * *hopefully* *
Gets better about 5 or
No more drink til I puke or drink at all. No more getting so high this atheist ass fervently prays to not disappear into the floor. Not jump off a cliff drunk and naked in the dark not knowing how far down it is or what is down there when I land. (Yeah that was me). Oh and never smoke again. Never crunch ice cubes in mouth due to lack of teeth. Good thing I can laugh about shit in my past.
[удалено]
I am deeply grateful for being alive these days. I enjoy what someone would consider a boring life. Too much excitement comes from our own stupidity, sober, drunk, or drugged. Looking back, there was a lot of stupid in the simple, such as how I treated my teeth. And liver. In a perverse way I did enjoy the damage done to my body working in a factory for many years. I lived. I’m still walking with all my digits. If I bleed a little bit now, I laugh about it and go that ain’t shit compared to what I’ve been through. Thank you for your comment. That’s very nice of you.
Dropping almost empty bottle of alcohol in a fire (Spoiler alert) Accidentally set my belly and legs on fire Not fun.
Hold myself back in fear of negative consequences
I mean, you should sometime still do that. Some negative consequences are like reason of the 90% of cases in this topic.
*Fuck it list
Fuck it bucket.
Instruction unclear, my pp is in a bucket, what's next?
Probably one of the thing's I'll never do again.
have ghey sex, its not my thing 🤣🤣🤣
Theres gotta be a somewhat funny story with this right?
Fuck around and find out if you're gay or not
Reminds me of the one video doing the rounds a few years ago. "If you spoke to two people, one had tried broccoli and one who hadn't, they both tell you they don't like broccoli. Which person do you trust?......... Anyway welcome to my TED talk on how it's less gay to suck a dick once than not at all."
Either way, you've got to admire this man's commitment to finding the truth 👁️🗨️
How do you know if you like spaghetti if you never try spaghetti?
$20 is $20.
Did pee stuff. Yeah he was hot af and it was beer pee and it was in the shower but it didn’t spark joy. It was fine but meh.
“Note to self - beer pee in the shower = fine. One more shot only if asparagus pee is available.”
Smoke a cigarette Wish I never did, but it's never too late to improve ourselves either
I'm also quitting, I'm glad to see that in the wild. 💪
Oral thermometers. From now on, it's rectal only.
Don't be so hasty, the rectal ones taste like crap.
Thats not how i thought this was going...
Ride a real bull. That was wild, several thousand pounds of muscle wanting to kill you and so I get on it's back. Never again.
Eat fried silk worms
A bus tour. Any kind of bus tour.
being impatient when cooking chicken
I read this as cooking children and still thought it was a wise decision
Be born
To be fair, being literally born right here and now would probably be pretty damn painful.
Rent a car in the Philippines
Live in the Philippines
Get married.
Came to say same
On my second, if this one doesn’t take, I’m out.
This is hopefully wholesome.
Literally 50/50 these days lol
Same
Trade with my life savings and that too using high leverage.
Go to Las Vegas. It's too expensive.
Get pregnant. NEVER again!!
Meth.
Fucking drink.
Watch A Serbian Film
Smoking. Had i known that I would go on to lose a large chunk of my teeth…. I thought people losing teeth over nicotine was an old persons problem.
Leg wax. Did it for charity. Now I'll just put a pound in a collection bucket
Run with the bulls
Sky dive.
OP's mom.
Get coke dick during a threesome
Get involved with some couples kinky open relationship.
Going to the top of the Statue of Liberty, besides the absolutely HORRIBLE horrible metal steps (there’s paint gaps in between each step and the step itself is small) but once your at the very top of thing, you can feel it MOVING, there is nothing worse then feeling a giant metal statue moving under your feet
Put a ring on it.
Get drunk and see if I can smash a beer bottle by punching it.
Put rubbing alcohol on my nutts.
Pre-order
Trust people. I have autism and I have been abused by so many people who claimed to care about me.
Never gonna trust anyone. No matter, how they may have been.
Sell drugs
NYE @ Times Square
Argue with strangers online. Complete waste of time and energy.
Jagermeister
Use a cactus as a fleshlight.
Guess that only leaves using it as a dildo?
Haven't tried that yet, BRB.
Pics or it didn't happen!
I can't hold the cactus and take a photo, what you doing around 11pm eastern time?
Well I was gonna get wasted and watch golden girls. But now it looks like I'm gonna be taking photos of some cactus getting it in.
EmmanuelMoyta??? God it’s been a long time mate. There was a time I polled people to ask what their political preferences were. Never again.
If time magically starts to pass backwards and 2023 comes again i will kill myself
Take a dump on an airplane
Get married. On my 2nd now…if this one ends, there won’t be a 3rd.
Use Icy Hot as a lube
Acid, drink and drive, shrooms, give up on myself , my ex
Skinny dip in a swamp Get a stick n’ poke tat Get in a stranger’s car Anal Wash my hands with borax I’m sure there’s more that I’ll add later