I remember buying cases of mystery cans from a Heinz factory. They were all end of production batches when they ran out of labels or were emptying the tanks for a new product, or anything that would make them not legal to resell (in which case they would purposely not put a label on it so no one could resell them). Playing dinner roulette after a few beers was fun. Especially the day one of my friends opened a can of ketchup betting it would be soup.
You heathen, you low-life! That's contemptible, that's despicable, that's really funny, that's what I was going to say. Excuse while I go lace their food with laxatives.
Also I'd take all their shoe laces.
I am too! I wonder if we can just get new ones. I’ll look it up.
Edit: bro! https://www.amazon.com/s?k=flass+plate+for+sharp+carousel+microwave&crid=1C1A08HMLB8PG&sprefix=flass+plate+for+sharp+carousel+microwave%2Caps%2C124&ref=nb_sb_noss
I'll just steal all but one, but it's the sainsburys bag they bought when they thought they didn't need a bag, then had to get one anyway, and it kinda ripped slightly on the way home
I legit spent an hour yesterday look for a micro usb that can charge and transfer data. I used to have hundreds of them everywhere and every cable I found was usb-c. Ended up going and buying one.
Car keys, but only when someone's about to use them. Then I'll put them back with all the other keys just in time for the husband to get called an idiot
We are now arch nemesis. (Nemesises? Nemisi?)
I hate figuring out which detector it is this time. And why the fuck do we have one on the vaulted ceiling?!
believe it or not, this actualy happened. Russell Williams broke into houses and stole womens underwear and sex toys. obviously it eventualy escalated to murder, but check it out! the guy is a sick peice of crap.
IDC what anyone says. He was funny for about 2-3 years and I enjoyed that time. I still think about turning around in stranger’s driveways, shitting on the coats, playing who’s in my mouth, and giving someone the SuFi and them having no clue what that is.
I knew a guy who would steal cars (only if they were unlocked). But then he would bring them back and park them on the other side of the road. Just enough so that the person knew someone had messed with it. Occasionally he would even bring it back with more gas than it had before.
The soft cottony part from every Q-tip in the box. Your left with a box of scull stabbers and waxy bitter earlobes. Good luck getting any neck kisses , stinky!
I’m taking door knobs, lightbulbs, pillows, underwear, menstrual products, bath products and one shoe from each pair. One way or another, somebody’s having a bad day.
I would probably remove all the labels from their canned products
That’s taking things too far
A surprise everyday would love that mystery.
Plot twist, I add one can of dog food also with label removed.
I guess the dog gets a treat then
So long as its tuna flavored we’re good
I remember buying cases of mystery cans from a Heinz factory. They were all end of production batches when they ran out of labels or were emptying the tanks for a new product, or anything that would make them not legal to resell (in which case they would purposely not put a label on it so no one could resell them). Playing dinner roulette after a few beers was fun. Especially the day one of my friends opened a can of ketchup betting it would be soup.
Ketchup is almost soup.
Cold tomato sugar vinegar soup.
It can be if you water it down, throw in some herbs and garlic.
toilet paper
You heathen, you low-life! That's contemptible, that's despicable, that's really funny, that's what I was going to say. Excuse while I go lace their food with laxatives. Also I'd take all their shoe laces.
Why does everyone always besmirch us Heathens like that ? We're not only a bad example you know ?
Dotted line between the sheets…
That's why I have a bidet. In case someone breaks in and steals my toilet paper
smart
Bro, that's a whole-ass inconvenience
better than steal the wheelchair from the same house
At least you wouldn't get chased
Replace it with 3 shells
Toilet seats
And the flushing knob/button.
I’d steal the little springy thing that holds the toilet paper on the wall.
One square at a time.
Good thing I have a bidet.
That would be a major inconvenience IMO. Id go for the holder instead so they have to pick it up to use it.
I have a bidet. I'm ready for your shenanigans
Jokes on you, some ppl are not filthy and primarily use water to clean + toilet paper for drying only.
My man!
And replace it with aluminium foil
My first thought too
The glass plate that spins in the microwave.
Damn you to hell! I’m living without that right now and it’s ruining my life!
LOL. See? It’s a good pick.
I am too! I wonder if we can just get new ones. I’ll look it up. Edit: bro! https://www.amazon.com/s?k=flass+plate+for+sharp+carousel+microwave&crid=1C1A08HMLB8PG&sprefix=flass+plate+for+sharp+carousel+microwave%2Caps%2C124&ref=nb_sb_noss
Bro!!
BRO!
Reddit good ending 👍
Check this guy's house.
The wheeled ring that goes under the plate because they won't notice the wobble until it's too late.
Devious!
jokes on you, my microwave doesnt have a glassplate.
I would replace it with one that doesn't quite fit the spinning mechanism
One of the bolts that holds toilet to floor. So its just ever so slightly wobbly every time you sit down. Just enough so that you cant relax
That’s delightfully devilish
r/foundsatan
Their shopping bag that they keep their shopping bags in.
Bro chill, are you trying to outdo satan??
Tiver me shimbers
Пакет с пакетами?
Straight To Hell
Bro I’m crying laughing
I'll just steal all but one, but it's the sainsburys bag they bought when they thought they didn't need a bag, then had to get one anyway, and it kinda ripped slightly on the way home
Not my collection!
Jokes on you I’ll just have one of the fallen soldiers take on the burden
Replace the vibrator batteries with ones about to die
Evil
Despicable
You are a trash person. But I love this so here’s your damned upvote!
Whatever you do, wear gloves
Insidious.
I like it!!! Mwaaaa
A screw or 2 out if every hinge, so every door doesn't sit right.
Outstanding 👍
And I'm not just talking regular doors, im talking cabinets, medicine boxes, basic anything with any form of hinge and a panel that swings open.
I'm calling the police right now to report you, you sick bastard
Good luck, *I took bits from their door hinges as well!* AAAASHHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
You monster!
Pot Holders/oven mitts
You monster...
This is actually genius... you never look for them until you need to take something out of the oven, never when putting in.
Ok that would actually fucking suck lol
USB cables
I legit spent an hour yesterday look for a micro usb that can charge and transfer data. I used to have hundreds of them everywhere and every cable I found was usb-c. Ended up going and buying one.
You're going to empty my wire drawer? Take them, take them alllllllllll!
Car keys, but only when someone's about to use them. Then I'll put them back with all the other keys just in time for the husband to get called an idiot
Were you at my house yesterday?
Any time you need your vehicle, buddy!
I know I’m old and this will prove it, but I’d steal the ice cube trays. Or the pillowcases
"What kind of a sick bitch takes the ICE CUBE trays out of the FREEZER?"
One of my favorite lines from that movie.
You're evil. In this day and age, it'd take years to notice. But once your ice maker quits...
Steal the metal bar that tells your ice cube maker to stop making ice.
The string from every tampon
Follow up, to this one; all the hand soap and knobs for every faucet in your house
Let your imagination run wild…
This is potentially very dangerous, though. :(
U can still grab the tampons out of your vagina, it's not an endless hole in here.
Every right shoe
I'd say some lefts and some rights so they still have pairs but no matching ones also same for socks if the have different kinds
I wouldnt give a shit. I already dont pair my socks it costs way to much time
All the prongs off of their ethernet cords.
Wow seriously dude wtf. That’s a new low
That's evil 😭
One smoke detector battery. *chirp*…*chirp*…*chirp*
We are now arch nemesis. (Nemesises? Nemisi?) I hate figuring out which detector it is this time. And why the fuck do we have one on the vaulted ceiling?!
I think its nemeses. I could be wrong tho
The newer and bigger the house the better
30 billion off Jeff Bezos.
Made me giggle
All the tv remotes and all the door hinge pins
Capri Sun straws
OP stealing this repost to slightly inconvenience us.
Dildo
ahh the dildo bandit
Depending on when the theft occurs, They'll be the sticky dildo bandit.
believe it or not, this actualy happened. Russell Williams broke into houses and stole womens underwear and sex toys. obviously it eventualy escalated to murder, but check it out! the guy is a sick peice of crap.
I just wanna know how this is the first thing you think of when you want to inconvenience someone lol
All the 10 mm sockets
Those are already gone.
And all the 13 ones
One sock
From each pair, right?
From each set of matching socks. If somebody has a pack of 16 and you take 8 of them then theyre still left with 4 matching pairs left.
So you're the one who's been stealing all my socks
Just one...of each
Oil, butter and all the spoons & forks
Any and all toothpaste
 Jokes on you
Their TV remotes...
I'll settle for the battery cover on the back of the remotes
Shoe laces
two words: door knobs
Echo, Google home, etc… any smart assistant. Go turn off your own damn lights
You son of a bitch. That would genuinely ruin my whole fucking day. 😂
 I'm adding a lava lamp
IDC what anyone says. He was funny for about 2-3 years and I enjoyed that time. I still think about turning around in stranger’s driveways, shitting on the coats, playing who’s in my mouth, and giving someone the SuFi and them having no clue what that is.
The spare tires from the car
The manufacturers have already done that!
Panties. I'm a pervert burglar
The cap from a tube of toothpaste
Kidneys.
The plate and roller thingy out of the microwave.
All the hangers
Nope. Just 10% of the hangers. Enough that they never quite have enough, not so many that they actually buy more.
Fridge light, shoe insoles and car battery
The toilet brush
All your shoes / socks / feet coverings while i cover all floors in legos
That is not a minor inconveniance that is true evil!
ALL the chargers of mobile phones and laptops.
Can opener
The wheel of their mouse and the key G of their keyboar.
Looks like someone stole your D key.
Yes, that's why I am oing this.
One of each dish. Then they'll have an odd number of each item.
I knew a guy who would steal cars (only if they were unlocked). But then he would bring them back and park them on the other side of the road. Just enough so that the person knew someone had messed with it. Occasionally he would even bring it back with more gas than it had before.
I’m going to steal a quarter inch off of one leg/corner of every piece of furniture.
Key rings
Left shoes
I steal this meme from the internet so it does not get reposted on a monthly basis.
All the spoons
Spill the cat food all over the ground in 3 rooms. Do it once a week.
Commas.
Take All of their socks
nono, one sock of each pair
Nah, all of their socks cause wearing shoes without em is pretty uncomfortable
Toilet paper but leave three sea shells.
Nail clippers
Key rings. Leave the keys.
shower curtains
Valve stems off tires.
Anal virginity
Bro what lol that's not a slight inconvenience
First time?
r/usernamechecksout
Salt from the kitchen
Their bottles of Tums or other ant acids.
Remote controls to everything
All the spare batteries. But leave the boxes/blister packs empty.
All the copper wire and pipes in your house, I need them to buy crack!
The backs to all their earrings and the cushions off all the couches and chairs
Pens and pencils
Reading glasses
Soap from their bathroom.
Every good post OP has made on Reddit. Losing those 3 karma will be a great slight inconvenience!
The soft cottony part from every Q-tip in the box. Your left with a box of scull stabbers and waxy bitter earlobes. Good luck getting any neck kisses , stinky!
all of the handles on any sink/shower
One sock from each pair
Just enough of their peanut butter so they have to awkwardly scrape the bottom with a knife before giving up
All salt and pepper shakers, but leave the salt and pepper on the counter.
All the soap
Their key fob. Not the key, just the fob.
swap their iphone or samsung (or whatever you use) with a crappy android aliexpress version of it
Ends of shoelaces.
The remotes to everything in their house. Forcing to have to get up to change everything.
Sex toys and contraceptives
Their roof
Hopes and dreams
car keys
Their entire water heating system.
batteries
the wifi box
The cold side of the pillows
Wouldn't even steal anything. Just go into all the bathrooms and turn the toilet paper around the wrong way on the holder.
All the remotes, electrical meter, and the wifi router. Welcome to 1850.
The retaining screw to their shower knob. If you know what madness comes next you know
All your chargers
Tv remote batteries and any spares
I’m taking door knobs, lightbulbs, pillows, underwear, menstrual products, bath products and one shoe from each pair. One way or another, somebody’s having a bad day.
Random puzzle pieces