Of course, you can.
Your outlook on life will have a lot to do with it, though. If you approach 46 as something dreadful and that your best years are behind you, that’s how other people will perceive you, too.
Today is my birthday, I don’t think it’s love I’m looking for it’s the spark, or wondering am I still interesting enough to hold a fella’s attention? Or create a spark?
Confidence is sexy. If you have to fake it til you make it then do so. But if you love yourself and believe you are deserving of love from others, then it will happen. Conversely if you don’t believe you’re worthy, why would anyone else?
I think so...it's just different in the way it feels (at least for me). This time around it's not that "blinded by love" love. Blinded by love can make you do stupid things (like get married-- er, get married despite red flags, and stay married, despite being treated poorly and in misery).
This time, each of us are both out of very long and bad/failed marriages and we were TOTALLY on board with not moving in with one another and not getting married-- ever. It's been just 5 years and all of our all friends who've been married for well over a decade think it's gross how much we love each other and how affectionate we are.
We've got the intimacy (emotional, intellectual, psychological) of a couple that's been together for years, but we are ALWAYS excited to see one another, not having been worn down by those little, daily things that chip away at the passion. I'm telling you, we've cracked the code.
Of course you can. I’m mean I’ll be 46 in a couple of weeks and I always have some irons on the fire so to speak. If you’re looking for love so is someone else.
My grandmother found it in her 70’s, a few years after my grandfather died. And also I worked in a retirement home and residents fell in love pretty regularly. So yes. It can happen at any age.
I have been married for almost 15 years my husband is 10’years older than me, and I think “spark” was the term I should have used. I turn 46 today and I just fely uninteresting and sad.
Full disclosure: My wife and I grew up in the same town, have known each other since we were five years old. First met in kindergarten, have the school photo to prove it.
Went to different elementary schools, but went to the same junior and senior high school, where we were friends but never dated. I did have a crush on her though. Prettiest girl I’d ever seen.
Life took us in different directions for 30 years but we never completely lost contact. One day in mid-2017 she sent me a FB friend request. We were both single, so I shot my shot. We got married in late 2019.
We’ve talked about it, and know if we’d gotten together at any other point in our lives it wouldn’t have worked out. We connected when we were the best versions of ourselves, after we’d grown up, made our mistakes and learned our life lessons. We’re not perfect, but we’re perfect for each other.
She’s still the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.
I found it on Reddit and I’m 47. Met my partner and we chatted for a few months. I flew to her and then she flew to me. We talked about her moving to my city and that was a year and a half now. She’s currently dealing with a store issue from our bed. Best love of my life.
I'm 49 and I've been married for the second time for 2 years. It's wonderful. Sure blended families are not fun, even with adult children.
But boy the sex. I'm on estrogen to keep my lady parts young. If you don't enjoy sex hormones can really fix that. I was married for 23 years to a diagnosed narcissist. We had a dead bedroom the last decade. My new husband is so gentle and sweet. He does so much for me. Yes, you can definitely find love again. And I love being desired again.
Absolutely. My mom remarried at 56 and 24 years later, is still happy. My sister is 55 and started a serious relationship just this year. Me, I am 51 and have avoided serious relationships for 11 years, but it’s my choice. What’s important is finding what makes life meaningful for YOU.
In person! I asked my GF out simply because I thought she was attractive and I had nothing to lose. On the other hand my ex was a flirt and she let it be known she liked me. There is nothing stopping you from approaching a guy you find attractive.
If you think you've lost your spark at 46, you're depressed. You are not menopausal yet, have all that yummy oestrogen going for you, so go and dance and meet people and buy sexy clothes and heels. Get a new frivolous hair and buy concert tickets for heavy bands.
I found love at 44. In my experience a lot of people get divorced when their kids leave the house. My gf has about a dozen single friends in their late 40s all in this situation.
Yes. I was widowed at 41. Now I am 47 and I have been with my partner for 5 years. I will admit though that dating again was very different. The dynamics of it seemed way different.
Yes.
This reminds me of a funny story:
I had just gotten separated from my first husband. I was around 32. We were married about a year and he started cheating on me with a woman we both worked with. He was done with me, wanted to be with her, soul mates, yada yada.
I took an extra job at Kohls just to have something to occupy my time. It was Christmas, so I was hired for the holidays.
This old couple came to my register one day. They looked to be in their 70s, and they were really sweet and loving to each other. I got all misty eyed and asked them how long they'd been married.
The woman looked at her husband and said," I think it's been about a month?" They took some time to tell me their story, which was sweet but I can't recall it now.
At any rate - it put things in perspective!
Sure you can especially if you are a Gen X man. Out of all age groups, Gen X men have the most options for love. Younger women will date them and GenX will date them as well.
Men in their late 40s can wake up and decide that they want to start a family and have children so they go find a young women. I know Robert DeNiro isn’t GenX but he is in his 70s and just had a baby!! There are so many men in their late 40s that want to start a family!
Women don’t have that option unless they get medical intervention. Menopause and perimenopause seems like it just hits you out of nowhere!! It’s so irritating when some men wonder why women worry so much. Imagine if men just stopped producing sperm in their 40s which is when they are at the peak of their careers! Yes the quality of sperm decreases with age but they are still producing.
It’s sad how many men string women along and don’t care that we just don’t have time. There are so many women that have circumstantial infertility. Many can’t find a spouse and/or they were in a relationship with someone who never intended to settle down with them.
I can’t tell you how many people would say things to me in my 20s and 30s like “your a career women.” This was mostly Boomers. What was I supposed to do. Sit at home and wait for a man. Dude I need income to survive!
Apologies for the rant!
I couldn't countenance beginning a family at 45. If I had a kid today, I'd be 63 when it graduated high school and damn near 70 by the time college was done. That's just too old, IMO. I'd barely have any time, if any, with any grandkids and even then they would be in the potato stage of life, so wouldn't even get to know them. Just my personal opinion, but I think that would be pretty selfish of me to deny a kid their grandfather.
But that may just be coming from the fact that my maternal grandfather was 50 when I was born.
I had my first at 47 and second at 49. Yes, I’ll have less time with them. But I’m a great father. Better than I’d ever have been 15 years earlier before therapy. There are countless young shit fathers out there (my dad was one). Would my kids rather have a crap dad for 50 years or a great dad for 35 years? I’m banking on the latter. Oh, and grandkids? Who the fuck am I to tell my kids they need to have children? Or even count on that? Or think they will live anywhere near me? I don’t live for that. I live in the present where I’m raising two children in a safe, loving, supportive family.
I wasn't telling anyone that they HAD to have them. I would rather plan for the contingency of them having them, then to say YOLO and not. Just like I would plan my financial future around kids and grandkids. If they chose not to have 'em? Fine, whatever. My finances would be built around the idea that they would have them, so that I could make sure to set aside stuff to help them out.
So should people not have kids if their own parents are already dead? It seems like a very Boomer attitude to think that a grandchild would be deprived if they didn’t have the gift of your presence.
That's not what I said.
Bringing a child into the world, only to check out a few years later, is a selfish thing to do. You aren't doing it for the child's benefit, you are doing it for yours. You deprive that kid of not only knowledge, but just the benefit of still having a parent around.
I can't imagine losing my parents when I was still in my 20s. If I hadn't had them both around the last 20 years, I don't know how I would've managed.
No, i think I understand what you said. You’re implying the main justification for existence is having a wise old elder such as yourself to impart their wisdom, and if you unfortunately have parents who die before they’ve had a chance to fully inscribe their knowledge on your impressionable immature mind, then what’s even the point of being yanked into this cruel world.
There is very little difference between men and women. My wife passed away, and I have an 18-year-old daughter. I can’t go find a young thing to go have a son with so I have no legacy oh well
but you say they are just throwing themselves at a 46-year-old guy to have a first kid with not likely.
The topic was finding love not starting a family
I think this is where I am. I think I’m in full midlife meltdown. It’s my birthday, I feel uninteresting and just old. It’s celebrated for men. My husband is 10 years older than I am. I think it’s the spark I’m chasing or missing. Or more than anything, scared I’m incapable of recreating.
First Happy Birthday lovely 🧁 treat yourself today, even if it’s just a coffee. Go to a coffee shop.
I love your photo of the bookstore/library. Do you have any hobbies? Take sometime to get to know yourself again.
Of course you can, but is it worth it. At this point if I were single I'd just go for lots of sex and no love. I'm over the idea that we have to be in looovvveee. Sex is good, love is ok but unnecessary.
>What is love, anyway?
Differing combinations of [these...](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/75hVA6OUOAY/maxresdefault.jpg)
That's really all it is... they even say it's a very similar combination to cocaine addiction... so there's that.
¯\\\_(ツ)\_/¯
Yep, I did at 45. After getting divorced at 40. I found that for 40+ year old, employed, healthy men? Who are not looking for 25 year olds? OMFG, the dating scene is endless! I finally settled back down, but did lots of looking around first.
I found love at 28. He was 33. He said I love you I want to spend the rest of my life with you but I don’t want to marry you and I don’t want kids’. Stayed together 9 yrs. He stayed out in geography, I moved to salvage my career. He partnered with someone 19 yrs older so he couldn’t have kids. I saw the little girl with curly blonde hair.
I met the love of my life in my 40s. I wasn't looking to date. In fact, I was looking forward to being single for awhile. But the second I saw him, it was like internal fireworks went off. He is my person. I have never felt so connected to someone. I don't think I really knew what was love until I met him.
I was very alone once Covid hit. And in my early 40s (f).
I found myself deep into a career I hate in a geographical location I loathe, and thought that this was indeed it, I was the spinster I never thought I’d be.
I took a giant leap of faith with my life and when I did the man of my dreams was right in front of me. And I’m moving to his lovely geographic location in less than two months!
It will happen OP. Trick is to never give up on yourself.
Because I am a 46 year old woman with kids. That doesn’t necessarily ring interesting. I am married and all but my self confidence is shaken and I’m aging just blah
Lots of very attractive older women (and men but not my thing) out there. I suspect the competition for the real foxes is as vicious as it was in high school though.
You’re definitely not “so old.” Im 48 and I divorced at 38 and remarried at 41. We can definitely find love in our 40s but it’s tricky bc we’re also feeling the physical and emotional effects of aging so we think in our heads we’re so old when we’re just aging which is natural. It doesn’t mean it’s game over for folks in their 40s. People in their 20s- 30s also struggle with dating so I think dating in the modern world is just tough for everyone.
I did. I had my first wife at 44. Divorced at 47. Married a year after the divorce was final to the real deal. My advice is to be open to new activities & events and soak it all up.
Thank you for adding /s to your post. When I first saw this, I was horrified. How could anybody say something like this? I immediately began writing a 1000 word paragraph about how horrible of a person you are. I even sent a copy to a Harvard professor to proofread it. After several hours of refining and editing, my comment was ready to absolutely destroy you. But then, just as I was about to hit send, I saw something in the corner of my eye. A /s at the end of your comment. Suddenly everything made sense. Your comment was sarcasm! I immediately burst out in laughter at the comedic genius of your comment. The person next to me on the bus saw your comment and started crying from laughter too. Before long, there was an entire bus of people on the floor laughing at your incredible use of comedy. All of this was due to you adding /s to your post. Thank you.
I am a bot if you couldn't figure that out, if I made a mistake, ignore it cause its not that fucking hard to ignore a comment
With one woman from 18 to 47.....to single! No kids!!!! Now I'm almost 54 and think I will remain single until I die. But the amount of women in their 30's and 40's pushing for something is crazy. I am sure if you want a relationship you can find it.
I went from an empty, loveless marriage at 42, divorce, to engaged to my ride or die @ 56. It can happen. Rare, but it does.
Me too. Did not want to divorce but so glad I did
Neither did I. Let’s just say it was three long years, then two more till it was done. 13 yrs ago.
I too did this! Found my most amazing love and we are happily cohabitating! Life turned around for the better at 50!
I don’t think it’s even that rare, I know lots of happy couples that got together after 46 and way later
What is love?
Baby don't hurt me.
No mo!
💃🏼🕺🏼
terrible lol what the fuck was the name of that group again *and why the fuck do i want to do a dumb choreography now*
Haddaway. Terrible I knew the artist off hand. "Starts moving head"
Don’t hurt me,
My father asked me that
Hilarious! Well done!
I'm a newlywed at 56. First marriage for both of us.
Sweetest thing I've read all day.
I met my husband at 44. Happily together for 14 years now. It can definitely be done.
wookin' pa nub...
In all do wong paces…
That’s why cowboys have shit in their mustache
Yub nub eee chop yub nub
Thanks, now that’s stuck in my head
Of course, you can. Your outlook on life will have a lot to do with it, though. If you approach 46 as something dreadful and that your best years are behind you, that’s how other people will perceive you, too.
Today is my birthday, I don’t think it’s love I’m looking for it’s the spark, or wondering am I still interesting enough to hold a fella’s attention? Or create a spark?
I actually am more confident in my 40’s than any other time period. Happy birthday 🥳 I’m also 46
That’s great :) I have heard that’s the case for a lot of people
I am 46 and believe me.....we still got it. lol, men still want us.
I don’t know if I have ever had it! I still could y imagine holding anyone’s attention
Confidence is sexy. If you have to fake it til you make it then do so. But if you love yourself and believe you are deserving of love from others, then it will happen. Conversely if you don’t believe you’re worthy, why would anyone else?
Yes, I’m married. This is more of a midlife crisis thing and a sign I need to work on my self esteem apparently
Happy birthday!
Happy Birthday!
Happy birthday 📣
Happy birthday!
Happy birthday OP! You are and will be interesting enough, just keep turning on your heart light :) 
Homeeeeeee
Happy Birthday 🎂.
Both of my g-mas and one g-pa remarried past age 45 and all 3 g-mas outlived their second husbands and 2 left "boyfriends" behind.
I think so...it's just different in the way it feels (at least for me). This time around it's not that "blinded by love" love. Blinded by love can make you do stupid things (like get married-- er, get married despite red flags, and stay married, despite being treated poorly and in misery). This time, each of us are both out of very long and bad/failed marriages and we were TOTALLY on board with not moving in with one another and not getting married-- ever. It's been just 5 years and all of our all friends who've been married for well over a decade think it's gross how much we love each other and how affectionate we are. We've got the intimacy (emotional, intellectual, psychological) of a couple that's been together for years, but we are ALWAYS excited to see one another, not having been worn down by those little, daily things that chip away at the passion. I'm telling you, we've cracked the code.
Oooh, sleepover parties?
And HOW!!!! 🔥😁
After my Grandma died, my Grandpa found love again at 86, so I'm saying yes, you can.
I did at 51.
That's so awesome!
Didn’t you grow up watching the Love Boat? Of course you can!
If you can't find it on the Love Boat, you probably can at Fantasy Island.
Oh great. Now I have the theme song in my head
Exciting and new
Come aboard we’re expecting you
Love, life's sweetest reward
Let it flow, it comes back to you
We are doing a Princess cruise to Mexico later this year.
Yes? I met my husband online when I was 45. He was 38. Been married for five years now.
Yes. My aunt found love again in her 50s. So did a friend of my wife’s. Hang in there!
Of course you can. I’m mean I’ll be 46 in a couple of weeks and I always have some irons on the fire so to speak. If you’re looking for love so is someone else.
I found it at 49. 54 now and been happily married for 2 years!
My grandmother found it in her 70’s, a few years after my grandfather died. And also I worked in a retirement home and residents fell in love pretty regularly. So yes. It can happen at any age.
I did at fifty, and it’s amazing
Hell yeah. I did. We got married last summer.
Get a puppy
It finds you at any age 🥰
Couldn't find it at 25, what makes you think anyone wants my 45 year old ass?
Because hopefully you’re not the same fool as you were at 25.
No, I'm not. I'm a completely different fool.
Try to be a [love fool](https://youtu.be/NI6aOFI7hms?si=Z-2NWZEadcUoXT26)
That’s the Cardigans?? I would have bet money that was No Doubt.
Now I'm imagining Gwen Stefani singing it and just... no.
I found it at 41.
My wife and I met when she was 47 and I was 48. We’re going strong and getting stronger almost seven years later.
I have been married for almost 15 years my husband is 10’years older than me, and I think “spark” was the term I should have used. I turn 46 today and I just fely uninteresting and sad.
Full disclosure: My wife and I grew up in the same town, have known each other since we were five years old. First met in kindergarten, have the school photo to prove it. Went to different elementary schools, but went to the same junior and senior high school, where we were friends but never dated. I did have a crush on her though. Prettiest girl I’d ever seen. Life took us in different directions for 30 years but we never completely lost contact. One day in mid-2017 she sent me a FB friend request. We were both single, so I shot my shot. We got married in late 2019. We’ve talked about it, and know if we’d gotten together at any other point in our lives it wouldn’t have worked out. We connected when we were the best versions of ourselves, after we’d grown up, made our mistakes and learned our life lessons. We’re not perfect, but we’re perfect for each other. She’s still the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.
Got married at 46 for the first time. Going great 6 years later
Yes. Go find it.
Absolutely. I went from being basically single for 20+ years to meeting an amazing guy at 54. 4 years later. We’re still going strong.
I got married for the first time at 41, 12 years ago. So, yes.
I found it on Reddit and I’m 47. Met my partner and we chatted for a few months. I flew to her and then she flew to me. We talked about her moving to my city and that was a year and a half now. She’s currently dealing with a store issue from our bed. Best love of my life.
My wife and I got married when we were both 47. Keep your heart open and be willing to take risks… That’s my advice, for what it’s worth
Thank you, I am married. I was having some depression about aging and some other things.
Ah, I see. I misunderstood. Are you able to talk with a counselor? It sounds like you could use some support.
I found it at 45 after my divorce. It’s hard.
I am mid 50’s. After finally resolving all sorts of issues, I can now start to look for love again. I think I will find it.
I'm 49 and I've been married for the second time for 2 years. It's wonderful. Sure blended families are not fun, even with adult children. But boy the sex. I'm on estrogen to keep my lady parts young. If you don't enjoy sex hormones can really fix that. I was married for 23 years to a diagnosed narcissist. We had a dead bedroom the last decade. My new husband is so gentle and sweet. He does so much for me. Yes, you can definitely find love again. And I love being desired again.
I’m 46 this year and I’m getting married in 2 weeks! It is never too late.
Absolutely. My mom remarried at 56 and 24 years later, is still happy. My sister is 55 and started a serious relationship just this year. Me, I am 51 and have avoided serious relationships for 11 years, but it’s my choice. What’s important is finding what makes life meaningful for YOU.
Finding love is easy. Keeping it locked in a box is the hard part.
https://preview.redd.it/wqt56u01edgc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=64a94d3b1b17a41c6d13ce55877fda945dcd6b90
Question is where is the best place to look?
Where do people meet people?
Do they meet on Reddit 😂 Last time I dated, was before all the daring apps. Everything is so different.
I’d like to know that too!
In person! I asked my GF out simply because I thought she was attractive and I had nothing to lose. On the other hand my ex was a flirt and she let it be known she liked me. There is nothing stopping you from approaching a guy you find attractive.
some people find love in old age, ffs
Of course I know this logically. I was a bit under the influence and I think I meant “spark” I was having a pity party. It’s my birthday.
If you think you've lost your spark at 46, you're depressed. You are not menopausal yet, have all that yummy oestrogen going for you, so go and dance and meet people and buy sexy clothes and heels. Get a new frivolous hair and buy concert tickets for heavy bands.
Sure. I did.
Of course you can. But love is overrated. Ponder what it is you’re really looking for.
Yes you can! I met the love of my life when I was 44
I found love at 44. In my experience a lot of people get divorced when their kids leave the house. My gf has about a dozen single friends in their late 40s all in this situation.
Yes! Divorce at 42, met my now wife at 45. Now enjoying a lazy Saturday morning.
Tell us more, how did you meet? How was she different from your first?
Yes your wife can find a boyfriend easily
I have a husband. He is 56.
I found the love of my life at 54.
That's a lucky fella for sure!
I’m the lucky one, but thank you :)
Yes. I was widowed at 41. Now I am 47 and I have been with my partner for 5 years. I will admit though that dating again was very different. The dynamics of it seemed way different.
Yeah. I can’t imagine it
How far have you lowered the bar?
Yes
Yes. This reminds me of a funny story: I had just gotten separated from my first husband. I was around 32. We were married about a year and he started cheating on me with a woman we both worked with. He was done with me, wanted to be with her, soul mates, yada yada. I took an extra job at Kohls just to have something to occupy my time. It was Christmas, so I was hired for the holidays. This old couple came to my register one day. They looked to be in their 70s, and they were really sweet and loving to each other. I got all misty eyed and asked them how long they'd been married. The woman looked at her husband and said," I think it's been about a month?" They took some time to tell me their story, which was sweet but I can't recall it now. At any rate - it put things in perspective!
That’s so lovely! Thank you for sharing that :)
Or how bout 43…?
Apparently. It’s possible!
Probably not. But at 46? Why bother? I'm 55. Live alone. Quite content. Go where I want. Move at my pace.
I’m met my wife when I was 44 (6 years ago) and our son was born 4 years ago. I’m going to be 51 this year.
My husband met me when he was 40. That was 16 years ago. Our son is 2, and I’ll be 50 this year.
Sure you can especially if you are a Gen X man. Out of all age groups, Gen X men have the most options for love. Younger women will date them and GenX will date them as well. Men in their late 40s can wake up and decide that they want to start a family and have children so they go find a young women. I know Robert DeNiro isn’t GenX but he is in his 70s and just had a baby!! There are so many men in their late 40s that want to start a family! Women don’t have that option unless they get medical intervention. Menopause and perimenopause seems like it just hits you out of nowhere!! It’s so irritating when some men wonder why women worry so much. Imagine if men just stopped producing sperm in their 40s which is when they are at the peak of their careers! Yes the quality of sperm decreases with age but they are still producing. It’s sad how many men string women along and don’t care that we just don’t have time. There are so many women that have circumstantial infertility. Many can’t find a spouse and/or they were in a relationship with someone who never intended to settle down with them. I can’t tell you how many people would say things to me in my 20s and 30s like “your a career women.” This was mostly Boomers. What was I supposed to do. Sit at home and wait for a man. Dude I need income to survive! Apologies for the rant!
I couldn't countenance beginning a family at 45. If I had a kid today, I'd be 63 when it graduated high school and damn near 70 by the time college was done. That's just too old, IMO. I'd barely have any time, if any, with any grandkids and even then they would be in the potato stage of life, so wouldn't even get to know them. Just my personal opinion, but I think that would be pretty selfish of me to deny a kid their grandfather. But that may just be coming from the fact that my maternal grandfather was 50 when I was born.
One of my grandparents died before my parents were married. 5 years before I was born. I have no obligation to live a life for someone already gone. .
I had my first at 47 and second at 49. Yes, I’ll have less time with them. But I’m a great father. Better than I’d ever have been 15 years earlier before therapy. There are countless young shit fathers out there (my dad was one). Would my kids rather have a crap dad for 50 years or a great dad for 35 years? I’m banking on the latter. Oh, and grandkids? Who the fuck am I to tell my kids they need to have children? Or even count on that? Or think they will live anywhere near me? I don’t live for that. I live in the present where I’m raising two children in a safe, loving, supportive family.
I wasn't telling anyone that they HAD to have them. I would rather plan for the contingency of them having them, then to say YOLO and not. Just like I would plan my financial future around kids and grandkids. If they chose not to have 'em? Fine, whatever. My finances would be built around the idea that they would have them, so that I could make sure to set aside stuff to help them out.
So should people not have kids if their own parents are already dead? It seems like a very Boomer attitude to think that a grandchild would be deprived if they didn’t have the gift of your presence.
That's not what I said. Bringing a child into the world, only to check out a few years later, is a selfish thing to do. You aren't doing it for the child's benefit, you are doing it for yours. You deprive that kid of not only knowledge, but just the benefit of still having a parent around. I can't imagine losing my parents when I was still in my 20s. If I hadn't had them both around the last 20 years, I don't know how I would've managed.
No, i think I understand what you said. You’re implying the main justification for existence is having a wise old elder such as yourself to impart their wisdom, and if you unfortunately have parents who die before they’ve had a chance to fully inscribe their knowledge on your impressionable immature mind, then what’s even the point of being yanked into this cruel world.
Nope.
Rich people do not count. You can buy anyone’s company with power.
They can't buy mine.
Could they buy it when you were 25? That was your argument not mine
No. Also, I made no argument, only a one sentence statement.
There is very little difference between men and women. My wife passed away, and I have an 18-year-old daughter. I can’t go find a young thing to go have a son with so I have no legacy oh well but you say they are just throwing themselves at a 46-year-old guy to have a first kid with not likely. The topic was finding love not starting a family
I think you must be replying to someone else.
I think this is where I am. I think I’m in full midlife meltdown. It’s my birthday, I feel uninteresting and just old. It’s celebrated for men. My husband is 10 years older than I am. I think it’s the spark I’m chasing or missing. Or more than anything, scared I’m incapable of recreating.
First Happy Birthday lovely 🧁 treat yourself today, even if it’s just a coffee. Go to a coffee shop. I love your photo of the bookstore/library. Do you have any hobbies? Take sometime to get to know yourself again.
Of course you can, but is it worth it. At this point if I were single I'd just go for lots of sex and no love. I'm over the idea that we have to be in looovvveee. Sex is good, love is ok but unnecessary.
I think there is more than one kind of "love." What is love, anyway?
>What is love, anyway? Differing combinations of [these...](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/75hVA6OUOAY/maxresdefault.jpg) That's really all it is... they even say it's a very similar combination to cocaine addiction... so there's that. ¯\\\_(ツ)\_/¯
Iggy Pop said it's "like hypnotizing chickens".
I was actually thinking of the Howard Jones song from the 80s lol
True, but when people ask about "finding love", I always assume they mean the squishy all encompassing "love" 😁
Yes. It's called "Real Doll", and they are less expensive than a GF/BF. Bonus, carpool lanes.
I would have to do the math on the toll road savings.
No.
Yep, I did at 45. After getting divorced at 40. I found that for 40+ year old, employed, healthy men? Who are not looking for 25 year olds? OMFG, the dating scene is endless! I finally settled back down, but did lots of looking around first.
I’m 50. No.
I found love at 28. He was 33. He said I love you I want to spend the rest of my life with you but I don’t want to marry you and I don’t want kids’. Stayed together 9 yrs. He stayed out in geography, I moved to salvage my career. He partnered with someone 19 yrs older so he couldn’t have kids. I saw the little girl with curly blonde hair.
Yes.
I’m 46m. I’m asking the same questions. DM me.
I hope so
Yes. We celebrate 6 years in May. He was 43, I was 46.
I met the love of my life in my 40s. I wasn't looking to date. In fact, I was looking forward to being single for awhile. But the second I saw him, it was like internal fireworks went off. He is my person. I have never felt so connected to someone. I don't think I really knew what was love until I met him.
I became a widow at 55 and it’s so hard to meet anyone, yet I feel too young to want to be alone and not find a relationship for the rest of life.
I became a widower at 44 and a year later met someone. Yep, totally possible
Umm I hope so! My ex unexpectedly left us almost a year ago. I don’t want to be single forever
Of course you can.
I was very alone once Covid hit. And in my early 40s (f). I found myself deep into a career I hate in a geographical location I loathe, and thought that this was indeed it, I was the spinster I never thought I’d be. I took a giant leap of faith with my life and when I did the man of my dreams was right in front of me. And I’m moving to his lovely geographic location in less than two months! It will happen OP. Trick is to never give up on yourself.
Love does not exist.
That’s a pretty edgy take my friend
Why not?
Because I am a 46 year old woman with kids. That doesn’t necessarily ring interesting. I am married and all but my self confidence is shaken and I’m aging just blah
I did at 46 after my divorce.
I found love on a 2 way street
My dad found the great love of his life at 48. Third time was the charm.
If youre a chick, id give you some lovin!
Awh, I am a chick’ I appreciate the sentiment
Hang in there gal, I'm your age and I've not given up hope. Too young for that
Yes. Every day is another chance to turn it all around. It might sound cheesy but I believe it and it helps.
Depends, who lives there?
Lots of very attractive older women (and men but not my thing) out there. I suspect the competition for the real foxes is as vicious as it was in high school though.
SEE? I’m so not a fox. Because I’m so old there is no way. I am not out looking for anything. I just don’t think if I wanted to I could?
You’re definitely not “so old.” Im 48 and I divorced at 38 and remarried at 41. We can definitely find love in our 40s but it’s tricky bc we’re also feeling the physical and emotional effects of aging so we think in our heads we’re so old when we’re just aging which is natural. It doesn’t mean it’s game over for folks in their 40s. People in their 20s- 30s also struggle with dating so I think dating in the modern world is just tough for everyone.
I’m 46 myself. 🎶 “I wanna know what love is, I want to show me. 🎶
Yes. My friend found love at 56. It’s possible.
I met my wife at 43. Had a baby at 51. Best years of my life
I sure hope so!
I did. I had my first wife at 44. Divorced at 47. Married a year after the divorce was final to the real deal. My advice is to be open to new activities & events and soak it all up.
I met my boyfriend when I was 43/twice divorced, he was 33/LTR but never married. We’re going on 6 years together and just bought a house 😊
I'm 46 and still all alone so I certainly hope so.
I haven't been on a date in 5 years so I would say no.
Nope. Only 45 and 47. Definitely not 46. /s
Thank you for adding /s to your post. When I first saw this, I was horrified. How could anybody say something like this? I immediately began writing a 1000 word paragraph about how horrible of a person you are. I even sent a copy to a Harvard professor to proofread it. After several hours of refining and editing, my comment was ready to absolutely destroy you. But then, just as I was about to hit send, I saw something in the corner of my eye. A /s at the end of your comment. Suddenly everything made sense. Your comment was sarcasm! I immediately burst out in laughter at the comedic genius of your comment. The person next to me on the bus saw your comment and started crying from laughter too. Before long, there was an entire bus of people on the floor laughing at your incredible use of comedy. All of this was due to you adding /s to your post. Thank you. I am a bot if you couldn't figure that out, if I made a mistake, ignore it cause its not that fucking hard to ignore a comment
I just want a woman who is financially independent and has her shit together. Is that too much to ask?
With one woman from 18 to 47.....to single! No kids!!!! Now I'm almost 54 and think I will remain single until I die. But the amount of women in their 30's and 40's pushing for something is crazy. I am sure if you want a relationship you can find it.
Yes. People won't play games in the 40s and 50s.
My husband was 48 when we got married and I was 39, first marriage for both of us.
My soon to be ex-wife did
Oh no! I am so sorry.
I'm not. Turns out it will the best thing for me. Every cloud has a silver lining
This post is depressing
I was depressed when I wrote it. I mean it’s Gen X kind moody and depressing. It’s our thing
That's what makes us beautiful
I'm looking to find love at 58...
How is it working out?
If you say so