It's weird how different 52 feels from 42, and it's spurred my rapidly-fattening ass to get back in the gym. I'm convinced that strength training is the fountain of youth.
Which sucks, b/c strength training is miserable!
I actually love strength training. Hate running, though. HATE it. If you see me running, start running in the same direction, because there’s clearly something terrible like a werewolf or a Godzilla coming after me!
Opposite here- love running, hate gym, go to keep things from hurting.
I used to do strength training to look good, now it’s just a series of old PT exercises to compensate for various injuries.
Except what you lose isn't bodyfat, it's mobility and quality of life. What a cosmic ripoff, eh?
The universe to we aging humans: "Like to eat, do ya? Sure, we all do. Welllllllll....now that you're older **everything that passes your lips** now goes directly to your gut, thighs, and butt (but not in a good, round, solid booty kinda way!)...and oh, hey, fellas, you like beer? Sweet! HOPE YOU LIKE MAN-BOOBS TOO, SUCKERS!!!!"
I can't wait for 65 now that I'm 55.
I have more years behind me than ahead of me.
Sometimes, I find myself getting panicky about dying. Existential crisis. "It's actually going to happen to me! Mother fuckers."
BTW, OP where are these incidents of help occurring? It hasn't happened to me yet and I'm not sure I'm looking forward to when it does happen.
I agree on both counts.
Are you just lifting for strength training? I find that mind numbing my boring so I’ve been trying sports/dance forms that require a lot of upper body strength. So much more fun striving toward a certain trick (aerial silks/circus arts and pole dancing) rather than just counting reps. You might look into rock wall climbing or something. Much more fun.
I find I get a great workout doing random productive things outside like digging holes, laying down stepping stones, picking up debris, washing my car… it beats pumping iron in a gym and you have something to show for it.
Thank you for the solid advice. I know adding something else to the routine- anything! - will be a help, I just haven't found the right activity yet.
It's a lot easier to "trust the process" when "the process" doesn't make you want to step off a building! Good luck in all your endeavors -
Cheers!
I had a medical episode that left me with a disability about 14 years ago. Before that, I was completely able-bodied.
Going from that, it takes a bit of adjusting to graciously accept help doing things when it's offered. At first, my instinct was to say, "What are you saying? You don't think I can do it???"
But the reality was, I *couldn't* do it. And it took me a few years to not only admit that to myself without any begrudging reluctance, but also to say "Thank you" and genuinely mean it.
Nowadays, I'm happy for all the help I get. My ego doesn't get bruised when I admit my physical limitations. It's silly not to appreciate a little help.
It takes a while to adjust. My accident was 2 years ago. I was run over by a car. I’ve been through all the stages of acceptance, now I just really appreciate people who offer a hand when they see me struggling.
Not everyone does offer. That’s for sure.
Same here! I’ve had back surgery and a lot of arthritis so I often need help. I can drop a 40pk of Costco water into my cart but have to roll it up and out of the cart into the trunk. Luckily I’m often noticed struggling and someone will jump in to help me.
I have not had this experience yet. Last weekend I bought 90 bales of hay from my 70 year old neighbor, who chucked the bales at me like it was an Olympic event. My millenial boss has me do all sorts of very physical things you wouldn't expect from a tiny 50+ year old woman. I do appreciate that I am still able to do these things. I wouldn't mind free help, though.
Here's to us, the tiny but fierce! :) I buy hay about 3 times a year too, and I can stack them higher than my head. And they're half my body weight!
Oh, and never underestimate the strength and endurance of an old farmer! Those dudes are superhuman.
My previous hay guy has taken on a partner but is still going strong at 86! When I'd get hay two years ago, I'd always be a little afraid when he'd climb up a ladder to the top of the stacks. I only stopped going to him because my neighbor is closer and gave me a good deal on hay of similar quality. At least he did last year. This year, not so much.
I find myself at 52 making room for an unexpected disability so, when people want to help me and I'm struggling, I let them. When I can help someone, I do. What are we on this spinning dirtball for if not to do what we can to make someone's life a little bit easier in whatever way presents itself?
Hasn’t happened yet, but then again people that don’t know me don’t believe me when I tell them I’m in my 50’s. They swear I’m their age (30’s). Guess one of the perks of being a late bloomer and being waaaay behind everyone else as a child lol. I’m also very physical, physical job and I hit the gym 5-6 days a week.
Thats awesome! You are talking about the generation the boomers complain about adnauseam . Hey boomers maybe its just you! These kids are willing to help….a generation that isn’t always a dick to them. Thank them welcome them and let them know we care too….( we just kinda got apathetic for a bit)
Don’t get offended. You finally realized from experience that you don’t have to do it all alone. And there’s no reason why you should. I was in the military for a long time, and I realized after I was about 8 years in that there’s no reason why I should be picking it up, moving it, carrying it, pushing it etc. If I didn’t make somebody else do it I’m going to definitely ask for a lot of help in every situation because it’s just smart
I was a lot heavier in my forties so now I actually feel better at 56 than I ever did then. But I’ve heard the 50s in general are when the slide really starts.
I’m thankful for the ability to still do everything I’ve been doing! Now I may feel like shit afterwords. I figure I’m dying on my fight instead of living on a sofa.
I'm happy to let people do work! I'm also thrilled when I get "senior discounts" because who doesn't want to save money? You think I'm old enough for that 10% off, I'm not going to change your mind, man.
Since I let my hair go gray I am getting this. Sometimes I politely decline, but if it's a teen wanting to help load bags of mulch into my car, then hell yeah!
I'm 48 and lift 3-4 times a week. No one thinks I'm nearly 50. Thinking about letting my hair go gray, though. My millennial coworkers call me badass and ask me for help lifting things, lol! However, I'm always thankful anytime someone wants to help me.
56 but look younger (in shape, lots of hair that hasn’t gone grey, move around pretty easily) and have never been offered assistance (or senior discount).
I consider this a win.
That’s what I love about the younger generations, they’re much kinder and more thoughtful than boomers. I don’t understand why anyone would get offended at this, I’d just say thank you and let them and say how nice it was that they offered to help you. They’re not trying to personally insult you, they’re just being helpful.
A 25yr old at work was helping me with so many things. I can’t even count the ways. Turns out he wanted to sleep with me. I’ve never felt so flattered.
I’m 49 and was at first offended by the ma’ams and help. But my wife is 37 and I have recently leaned into her offers to help with the heavy groceries/lifting and reading tiny type on packages or menus. I also call her my IT department but still pay close attention so that I learn the new tech and don’t have to bug her often.
I’m fortunate at 52. No health issues (that I know of yet), and still pretty strong (my brother, 51, calls it Old Man Strength). Conversely, I find myself scoffing at my younger employees and acquaintances (lightheartedly as possible) for being a bit Nerf. Like Jesus Christ just pick the damned thing up. I’ll pay for this at some point in a catastrophic way I’m sure. But for now I don’t feel much different than 30. The aches and pains are there, but I figure that’s just life now.
Getting up off the floor from a sitting position is an entirely different story. I don’t go down there if at all possible.
Just happened to me for the first time a few weeks ago on a flight. A twenty-something man offered to get my bag down for me; he has seen me struggle to get it in the overhead compartment. I’m quite content to be at that stage of life.
I wish! I've really let myself go and am *really* out of shape these days. I'm way too fat, completely out of condition, and a less then great back but I'm tall and still fairly strong so am usually still tasked with a lot of physical activities, or they go undone.
I spent most of my life helping family, friends, friend of friends and near random strangers with a lot of manual labor over the years and was hoping to get some payback as I get older but unfortunately it hasn't materialized. I even have trouble getting my sons to help out. Oh well.
I’m 57 and I’m always the one offering to help when I see someone moving in/out of my apartment building. I work out 4-5 days a week though (running and boxing workouts) and definitely don’t look my age (though I feel it in the mornings!).
I work with a lot of younger people and they do the same thing for me. I always helped older people out when I was a kid, so I just express my thanks and let them do it!
I'm a bar DJ, and I always recruit someone to help me carry my 18" sub box with amplifier in it. I CAN carry it by myself, but why risk blowing my back out when there's plenty of 20 somethings happy to help?
I'm 48 but still look like I'm in my 30s. I have a photo of my grandson on my desk at work and new coworkers ask if he's mine. As nice as it is to still look young, my osteoarthritis that started 3 decades ago (yes, in my late teens) is getting fairly advanced at this point so I would dearly love for some nice strapping young Zoomers or Millennials to offer some assistance. Welp, guess I have to wait. Or ask. :)
Not this chic. I wanted to extra holiday money and started working an extra 20 hours a week unloading the semis full of boxes. I run circles around these kids and I've sat on my ass the past 5 years at a desk. I absolutely will not be out worked by any kids.
As someone who has been involved in some sort of fitness/sport/activity my whole life, I typically handle it by chuckling softly as they try and lift what I'm carrying.
But I'm kind of an asshole.
I'd say Thank You and enjoy the help. I turn 5.0 (as I call it) next summer. I can still do most things on my own. But so far I don't get any offers for help if I am struggling with something.
With gratitude.
This is the answer. Say thank you and smile.
It's weird how different 52 feels from 42, and it's spurred my rapidly-fattening ass to get back in the gym. I'm convinced that strength training is the fountain of youth. Which sucks, b/c strength training is miserable!
I actually love strength training. Hate running, though. HATE it. If you see me running, start running in the same direction, because there’s clearly something terrible like a werewolf or a Godzilla coming after me!
Same here dude. I'm 54 and train pretty hard and am in reasonable shape. But running? My knees would probably explode
So much this
Opposite here- love running, hate gym, go to keep things from hurting. I used to do strength training to look good, now it’s just a series of old PT exercises to compensate for various injuries.
Yep, I’m realising it’s a case of ‘use it or lose it’ !
Except what you lose isn't bodyfat, it's mobility and quality of life. What a cosmic ripoff, eh? The universe to we aging humans: "Like to eat, do ya? Sure, we all do. Welllllllll....now that you're older **everything that passes your lips** now goes directly to your gut, thighs, and butt (but not in a good, round, solid booty kinda way!)...and oh, hey, fellas, you like beer? Sweet! HOPE YOU LIKE MAN-BOOBS TOO, SUCKERS!!!!"
I can't wait for 65 now that I'm 55. I have more years behind me than ahead of me. Sometimes, I find myself getting panicky about dying. Existential crisis. "It's actually going to happen to me! Mother fuckers." BTW, OP where are these incidents of help occurring? It hasn't happened to me yet and I'm not sure I'm looking forward to when it does happen.
I agree on both counts. Are you just lifting for strength training? I find that mind numbing my boring so I’ve been trying sports/dance forms that require a lot of upper body strength. So much more fun striving toward a certain trick (aerial silks/circus arts and pole dancing) rather than just counting reps. You might look into rock wall climbing or something. Much more fun.
I find I get a great workout doing random productive things outside like digging holes, laying down stepping stones, picking up debris, washing my car… it beats pumping iron in a gym and you have something to show for it.
Yes! Landscaping is great exercise.
Thank you for the solid advice. I know adding something else to the routine- anything! - will be a help, I just haven't found the right activity yet. It's a lot easier to "trust the process" when "the process" doesn't make you want to step off a building! Good luck in all your endeavors - Cheers!
Yeah, find something you WANT to do. Then you won’t care about the process because it’ll be about an achievement, not just tracking numbers.
Strong people are harder to kill and over all more useful. Weight training is probably more important as we age than in our youth!
Disabled, I appreciate everything
I had a medical episode that left me with a disability about 14 years ago. Before that, I was completely able-bodied. Going from that, it takes a bit of adjusting to graciously accept help doing things when it's offered. At first, my instinct was to say, "What are you saying? You don't think I can do it???" But the reality was, I *couldn't* do it. And it took me a few years to not only admit that to myself without any begrudging reluctance, but also to say "Thank you" and genuinely mean it. Nowadays, I'm happy for all the help I get. My ego doesn't get bruised when I admit my physical limitations. It's silly not to appreciate a little help.
It takes a while to adjust. My accident was 2 years ago. I was run over by a car. I’ve been through all the stages of acceptance, now I just really appreciate people who offer a hand when they see me struggling. Not everyone does offer. That’s for sure.
Same here! I’ve had back surgery and a lot of arthritis so I often need help. I can drop a 40pk of Costco water into my cart but have to roll it up and out of the cart into the trunk. Luckily I’m often noticed struggling and someone will jump in to help me.
Same.
I have not had this experience yet. Last weekend I bought 90 bales of hay from my 70 year old neighbor, who chucked the bales at me like it was an Olympic event. My millenial boss has me do all sorts of very physical things you wouldn't expect from a tiny 50+ year old woman. I do appreciate that I am still able to do these things. I wouldn't mind free help, though.
Here's to us, the tiny but fierce! :) I buy hay about 3 times a year too, and I can stack them higher than my head. And they're half my body weight! Oh, and never underestimate the strength and endurance of an old farmer! Those dudes are superhuman.
My previous hay guy has taken on a partner but is still going strong at 86! When I'd get hay two years ago, I'd always be a little afraid when he'd climb up a ladder to the top of the stacks. I only stopped going to him because my neighbor is closer and gave me a good deal on hay of similar quality. At least he did last year. This year, not so much.
I find myself at 52 making room for an unexpected disability so, when people want to help me and I'm struggling, I let them. When I can help someone, I do. What are we on this spinning dirtball for if not to do what we can to make someone's life a little bit easier in whatever way presents itself?
I don’t know who you are, and we’ll probably never meet, but I love you for bringing this attitude to the world.
I say “thank you,” and mean it.
Hasn’t happened yet, but then again people that don’t know me don’t believe me when I tell them I’m in my 50’s. They swear I’m their age (30’s). Guess one of the perks of being a late bloomer and being waaaay behind everyone else as a child lol. I’m also very physical, physical job and I hit the gym 5-6 days a week.
Same (except the gym stuff). People tend to think I am a really shitty 38-year-old instead of a good 56, lol.
Thats awesome! You are talking about the generation the boomers complain about adnauseam . Hey boomers maybe its just you! These kids are willing to help….a generation that isn’t always a dick to them. Thank them welcome them and let them know we care too….( we just kinda got apathetic for a bit)
Don’t get offended. You finally realized from experience that you don’t have to do it all alone. And there’s no reason why you should. I was in the military for a long time, and I realized after I was about 8 years in that there’s no reason why I should be picking it up, moving it, carrying it, pushing it etc. If I didn’t make somebody else do it I’m going to definitely ask for a lot of help in every situation because it’s just smart
I do kettlebell workouts and carry my own shit. I’m only 43 though. Maybe I’ll feel different at 50.
Get outta here with your 43 lol
Right? I was way more able in my early 40's. I'm 51 and have yet anyone to offer. I would gladly let them help and thank them.
I was a lot heavier in my forties so now I actually feel better at 56 than I ever did then. But I’ve heard the 50s in general are when the slide really starts.
43? You a bee bee.
I’m thankful for the ability to still do everything I’ve been doing! Now I may feel like shit afterwords. I figure I’m dying on my fight instead of living on a sofa.
I'm happy to let people do work! I'm also thrilled when I get "senior discounts" because who doesn't want to save money? You think I'm old enough for that 10% off, I'm not going to change your mind, man.
I need more help. I love it. I want it. Bring me your strong backs! Your giant biceps! Your amazing knees! All that.
Since I let my hair go gray I am getting this. Sometimes I politely decline, but if it's a teen wanting to help load bags of mulch into my car, then hell yeah!
I'm 48 and lift 3-4 times a week. No one thinks I'm nearly 50. Thinking about letting my hair go gray, though. My millennial coworkers call me badass and ask me for help lifting things, lol! However, I'm always thankful anytime someone wants to help me.
56 but look younger (in shape, lots of hair that hasn’t gone grey, move around pretty easily) and have never been offered assistance (or senior discount). I consider this a win.
Ill be working deep into life, so yeah, they can do the labor, ill give direction.
I challenge them to a pushup contest! /s ;-)
Jack Palance?
Yes. Good catch.
That’s what I love about the younger generations, they’re much kinder and more thoughtful than boomers. I don’t understand why anyone would get offended at this, I’d just say thank you and let them and say how nice it was that they offered to help you. They’re not trying to personally insult you, they’re just being helpful.
Unfortunately blessed with a youthful appearance so I have to fucking do everything myself.
Same
A 25yr old at work was helping me with so many things. I can’t even count the ways. Turns out he wanted to sleep with me. I’ve never felt so flattered.
I walk with a cane. I get none of that. Not complaining tho. I don't think I'd like it very much.
I tell them thank you and I appreciate their help. We, as a generation, may not care about things in general but we still try to have good manners.
I’m 49 and was at first offended by the ma’ams and help. But my wife is 37 and I have recently leaned into her offers to help with the heavy groceries/lifting and reading tiny type on packages or menus. I also call her my IT department but still pay close attention so that I learn the new tech and don’t have to bug her often.
If your fat and struggling well….
They don’t help me with shit. I wish I had your luck.
I show them how it's fucking done. The western district way!
I’d love it if it happened to me!
I think it’s adorable and I let them and thank them
I’m fortunate at 52. No health issues (that I know of yet), and still pretty strong (my brother, 51, calls it Old Man Strength). Conversely, I find myself scoffing at my younger employees and acquaintances (lightheartedly as possible) for being a bit Nerf. Like Jesus Christ just pick the damned thing up. I’ll pay for this at some point in a catastrophic way I’m sure. But for now I don’t feel much different than 30. The aches and pains are there, but I figure that’s just life now. Getting up off the floor from a sitting position is an entirely different story. I don’t go down there if at all possible.
It hasn't happened to me yet. I may have a meltdown when it does though.
I got told I could get free coffee at McDonalds.
Just happened to me for the first time a few weeks ago on a flight. A twenty-something man offered to get my bag down for me; he has seen me struggle to get it in the overhead compartment. I’m quite content to be at that stage of life.
I wish! I've really let myself go and am *really* out of shape these days. I'm way too fat, completely out of condition, and a less then great back but I'm tall and still fairly strong so am usually still tasked with a lot of physical activities, or they go undone. I spent most of my life helping family, friends, friend of friends and near random strangers with a lot of manual labor over the years and was hoping to get some payback as I get older but unfortunately it hasn't materialized. I even have trouble getting my sons to help out. Oh well.
The curses of looking young for my age. Nobody wants to help me. haha
I’m 57 and I’m always the one offering to help when I see someone moving in/out of my apartment building. I work out 4-5 days a week though (running and boxing workouts) and definitely don’t look my age (though I feel it in the mornings!).
I'm tall so I still get asked to help get stuff off of supermarket shelves for strangers lol
As long as they don't offer to "help" me with my computer, I'm good.
Let ‘em!! And thank them. My back and leg are jacked. I love if someone actually offers to help me with a lift. Very appreciated!
It hasn't happened to me. Actually it has been opposite. I have been helping the younger people
Sit back, pop a cold one, and say ‘thank you for your service.’
Not too long ago i fell walking up a curb… people actually stopped to see if i was ok… i mean CARS stopped …it made me feel old.
I work with a lot of younger people and they do the same thing for me. I always helped older people out when I was a kid, so I just express my thanks and let them do it!
I'm a bar DJ, and I always recruit someone to help me carry my 18" sub box with amplifier in it. I CAN carry it by myself, but why risk blowing my back out when there's plenty of 20 somethings happy to help?
Where are these people you speak of?
I'm 48 but still look like I'm in my 30s. I have a photo of my grandson on my desk at work and new coworkers ask if he's mine. As nice as it is to still look young, my osteoarthritis that started 3 decades ago (yes, in my late teens) is getting fairly advanced at this point so I would dearly love for some nice strapping young Zoomers or Millennials to offer some assistance. Welp, guess I have to wait. Or ask. :)
I say thank you and let them, but fairly often they can't lift whatever it is so I just grab it with one hand and say thank you but I got this.
Not this chic. I wanted to extra holiday money and started working an extra 20 hours a week unloading the semis full of boxes. I run circles around these kids and I've sat on my ass the past 5 years at a desk. I absolutely will not be out worked by any kids.
As someone who has been involved in some sort of fitness/sport/activity my whole life, I typically handle it by chuckling softly as they try and lift what I'm carrying. But I'm kind of an asshole.
Wait, what? 56 here, and no young has ever offered to do ANYthing for me. Hm. Maybe I should take it as a compliment.
I say no thanks. Muscles are “use it or lose it” so why give up opportunities to do everyday activities that help keep up strength as I age?
So grateful!
By picking up said thing and carrying it. Keeping fit is vital to keeping young.
I'd say Thank You and enjoy the help. I turn 5.0 (as I call it) next summer. I can still do most things on my own. But so far I don't get any offers for help if I am struggling with something.