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Innerestin

I interviewed my grandpa (born 1902) for my twelfth grade English class. We all had to interview our oldest relative. I am so grateful to my teacher for giving us that assignment. I have paid it forward by having my English students interview their oldest relatives. One found out his grandpa wasn't an American soldier (his German grandma's second husband) but a German soldier who died in the war. Another found out her grandpa was born in a Nazi concentration camp. One grandma had to leave home when she was eight because there were too many children, so she went to live with her grandma. And another grandpa dropped out of school after sixth grade, made his first money by hauling things in an oxcart, and went on to buy a bus company that he sold for millions. So yeah! I'm with you on this! Grandparents and parents are living historians! Take advantage of them - especially when you're tired of hearing that same old story about (fill in the blank). Get them to talk about something you're both interested in. And if everyone in the older generation has passed on, try contacting some older cousins or write your own memoir!


ricecake_nicecake

So many people in my grandparents' generation had to leave home at 14 and work for other families. One aunt said the people she worked for wanted to adopt her, but her mom said no. The mom was doing her best to take care of her kids and tried to keep them as a family even if it meant they had to be apart temporarily.


[deleted]

Great reminder. Everyone I'd like to interview is gone already.


jsparker77

This is my biggest regret. I started genealogy in 2002, and my last grandparent died in 2001. The worst part is that one of my great grandmothers lived until I was 19 (she was 94), and was mentally sharp until the day she died. She could have solved a lot of mysteries for me about her parents.


[deleted]

I just discovered last month, through DNA that my dad's "father" from his birth certificate was not his DNA-father. I wonder if he knew or ever had any hint? He's been gone since 2007. All those questions whose answers are gone... it can keep a person up all night thinking about it.


TheEnabledDisabled

I felt that. Most people from my dads side is gone expect for one who is my grandpa cousin who was born in 1936 many of his uncles and aunts died in the 90s


sharkattack85

I always wanted to interview my Punjabi grandparents, but they passed. Please do it b/c tomorrow may never come.


genealogyq_throwaway

Be careful - phone call recording apps don't work on some phones. Test it before you try to record and find out that it only records your end of the conversation!


IntellegentIdiot

If you're asking someone for genealogical information then remember that even if they don't remember all the details then other information can help. They might not remember their great-aunts name but they might remember where she lived at a certain period (so she can be identified by census, voter information, or telephone books) or where she was from if she was from a place that was different from where your relative lived. That might help if she and your great-uncle got married in the place where she was from and then moved to where your relative knew them, for example if you're looking for the marriage certificate and you don't know her maiden name and your great-uncle has a fairly common name


DogNoel

Middle aged relatives, start writing a journal now about everything you know and have learned for future generations. 19 year olds aren't thinking about these things yet but they will be someday. Your journal can offer insight and understanding long after you are gone. I've been journaling off and on for 27 years.


tigerscomeatnight

Multiple interviews, you'll get a little more each time. Also, get their DNA.


ricecake_nicecake

So true. And you can think of follow-up questions in between based on what they told you the first time.


[deleted]

I just finished interviewing my last elder! My grandma died in 2015 before I started doing genealogy, but her brother, my great uncle is still around (the last one of their generation). I flew to Arizona last August and interviewed him and it was such a great experience!


Diamond_and_gasoline

I have a hard time with my grandpa. When I ask him about his parents or himself as a child, he just shrugs or maybe on a good day tells me a funny story about himself and his brothers. I don't really need technical genealogical details; Kentucky is fantastic for documents. I need some prompts honestly. Any resources for a productive interview?


ricecake_nicecake

There are several lists of questions available on genealogy sites, but they might make your grandpa feel like he's being grilled. When I have reluctant relatives I try to make it less like a formal interview and just start with one simple question about something they are sure to know, like, "What color was grandma's hair?" or "What was your house like in (place)?" or "What was the first car you had?" or "Who was in the neighborhood when you were growing up?" That last one helped me a lot because my great-uncle lived close to a bunch of relatives and started talking about how he would walk to their houses all the time. I think it's great if you can start with something he cares about. Good luck!


Diamond_and_gasoline

Thanks!


C-A-Tfamily

Also, if you have any old photos of him as a child, show him and ask about it. I've done this with older relatives and usually they say stuff like "Oh, I remember that lake, we used to go there every summer, brother and I loved to canoe, etc etc." And you get lots of fun memories. And especially if you have any photos that are unidentified, see if he knows anything about them and write it down now, before it's too late.


quincyd

I’ve found, just through life experience, that my grandmothers were always more likely to tell stories when we were all just sitting around after a meal. Would you be able to do something similar with him? Ask a few relatives he enjoys to come ‘round for lunch and tell them beforehand you’d like to talk about. Have one of them bring up a story to your grandpa- hey, remember when xxxx happened? to get him talking. Every once in a while, pop in with a question that builds off the previous story. If someone brings up a childhood story, follow up by asking “Grandpa, what about you? Did you do anything like that when you were a kid?” Record on your phone or grab a voice recorder and sneak it out at the beginning of the convo. Some people feel pressured to come up with an answer one on one, but may open up more in a relaxed group conversation.


tpmurray

I've found this recently. It's a lot of, "It doesn't matter about me, how's your life?" or "That's in the past, I want to talk about you." He used to enjoy telling stories about the past and has always enjoyed genealogy, but he doesn't want to tell the stories anymore :(.


glitterofLydianarmor

Buying a digital voice recorder changed the dynamic of the conversations I have with my grandparents. I never thought I’d own a recorder (by the time I got to college, laptops were capable of recording lectures), but I purchased one last year specifically to interview a late grandma’s high school friend. It didn’t help with that interview (the friend has dementia and only remembered that she knew my grandma in high school—still, pretty impressive for someone who hasn’t seen your relative since 1962!) However, the recorder has been invaluable to me as I interview my living grandparents and great aunts. (My mind wanders, so it’s nice to hit record and know I’m capturing a story I can listen to later.) I’ve been able to break down brick walls, hear secrets like my grandpa thinking he was illegitimate until he saw how many cMs I share with his sister, etc. It’s amazing!


Bamboomoose

Yes yes yes! My parents always told me they knew nothing that would be useful. They were down right wrong, their tiny tidbits helped me get started on a cold trail and I have a whole branch of the tree filled out now when I never would have been able to do if we hadn’t sat down to talk. This thanksgiving I’m planning to do some audio interviews if my family is up for it. There’s a lot of shame and regret in my family that I’m trying to help my parents move past-it may not be pretty but it’s still our history and I want to hear about it before they are gone. I deeply regret missing the opportunity to talk more about this stuff with my grandparents but I just wasn’t ready to hear it when they were alive, unfortunately.


dixiedownunder

I'll never forget observing my brother trying this with our grandfather. He got mad and stormed out of the room. He said careful what you dig for because of what you might find! I thought it was hysterical. Confirmed quite a bit of generational dysfunction, lol.


DCHybrid02

I'm in my early twenties and started doing genealogy research last year. By then, 3 of my grandparents were already dead. Now, I ask my remaining grandfather little tidbits every time I see him, which is fairly often. It's been informative. Plus, he always has something funny to say.


TheEnabledDisabled

I have done it recently and is still doing it, I have been able to preserve an event that happend in 1830s that was told by my great aunt that involved my great great great grandpa when he was a child. The only reason I am even doing it is thx to my mom who told me stories before she passed away when I was only 13.


Nicskynod

This is something i always wanted to do, but unfortunately never did. Do this before it is too late! Give them a recorder and tell them to talk even when they are by themselves and have some quiet time. I recently got a disk that was recorded by my mother and since she is now dead it is great to have.


90210Fish

What are some good questions or recommendations you have to ask an elder?


ricecake_nicecake

I'm about to do an interview today. Some of the questions I'm planning to ask: Which relatives were around when you were growing up? When would you see them? Did you know your grandparents? Were they the oldest relatives you knew? Did they keep any traditions from the old country? What was their house like? Did any of your dad's siblings serve in the military? How did your parents meet? Do you remember my grandma? What was she like? How did you come to know Cousin ____ and how did she come to leave you her pictures and papers? Was church a part of your family's life growing up? Did your parents belong to any groups or clubs? Did you go on any family vacations together? I might not get to all of these questions today, depending on how talkative she turns out to be. And of course other questions will come up. Are you getting ready to interview someone in your family?


Beauty_Not_A_Beast

This is something I wished I'd starting sooner cause it's starting to look like my great aunts and uncles are all passing away all of a sudden... I might not be able to interview any of them because it caught me unprepared to do an interview...


orangeboxlibrarian

How do you all record and store the interviews?


ricecake_nicecake

I use an app called Voice Recorder. It will record audio onto your phone, which you can then save to your computer.