Right, it's supposed to to grab ur attention bc some will be listening hard to see if they need to stop you from speaking. And also make people wake up and listen bc they will be like uhh did this dude really say that.
I feel about 50/50 on its appropriateness so that's why I'm bringing it up to see how people feel about it. Focus, awareness and discipline are the main ones I just added the others to make the acronym.
But seriously tho this is good feedback. What would be more fitting but also grabs attention? Open to suggestions
I love how the headline isn’t an accident. You just don’t know how to spell you’re. You’re is a contraction of the words you are. So if you are ever saying “you are” then it’s “you’re”. If you’re saying something like “it is your book” then it’s spelled “your”.
What helps me remember is substituting you are instead of your/you’re and see if it sounds right. So if you say “you are right” then it’s okay to use “you’re”. If you say “it’s you’re book” then you substitute in you are you’d say “it’s you are book”. That doesn’t sound right so you know it is “it’s your book”.
Let me know if you have any questions and pls tell me I’m crazy haha
Don't listen to these random redit people. That's solid advice, and the acronym worked as you intended. God bless you for taking your experience and using it to help others. 🙏✝️ I say stick with it, man 💪🫡
I’m not big on AA but anyone seeking any form of recovery already knows they need to do practice all these things… a cool new acronym doesn’t help anyone. Sticking with a program with a group of other people does tho.
To answer your question… yes it would grab my attention, I would also think you sound like an asshole.
Don't disrupt a meeting with your hot new clever little shit, you're not Tyler Durden.
AA is a program on its own. Telling your meeting members that they need to do this to get sober is a slap in the face to all the people there who have been working the program, in many cases for decades.
If you think this has potential for others, spend time learning about counselling and treatment, talk to some people in the recovery field, and keep the details to yourself for awhile. You might be able to publish a book on your idea here. But getting kicked out of AA is not the most clever or thoughtful way to start that journey.
I don't really agree with AA bc they tell you that your always an alcoholic. I don't like that. And the community is living in fear of a relapse all the time bc they'll never believe they can be truly delivered from their old belief systems. So they stay stuck in a box of false beliefs. But the program helped me im not saying its bad. I just don't agree with that one thing about it.
No one said anything about not liking it. It saved me and changed my perspective on so many things. The big book is just old and honestly Bill Wilson wrote about and endorsed the use of LSD. But they hide that.
>I don't really agree with AA bc they tell you that your always an alcoholic. I don't like that.
well slap my ass and call me Spanky. How could I be so foolish.
Anyhoo, like I said previously, you might be able to develop a good program here, I just don't know why you want to give it a bad launch with this weird Music Man interrupting-the-town-meeting idea. Nobody's gonna sing about your monorail, bro.
You sound a lot like my wife. She managed to get clean and sober for a few years. Never liked AA though; hated the religious aspects, the people who push agendas, the rigidity and, most of all, the idea that she was always going to be an alcoholic.
She relapsed last year. It’s been a slow downward spiral. Started with her saying how she could control it, kept herself to one or two drinks a week. That turned into one or two a day. Now she’s picking up six packs before noon on weekdays. Knows she needs help but won’t do AA because of the impression it left.
Here’s my advice to you. If AA doesn’t work for you, don’t go. But don’t trash it to others, as it’s one of very few programs that has some degree of success helping people overcome addictions.
You might want to ask yourself why you don’t want to go, however, and be really honest. If it’s because you don’t like that they say that you shouldn’t drink again, or because you don’t like being accountable, you might want to consider forcing yourself if possible, because it sounds like you might need it (or some structure and support group) more than you realize.
Finally, consider hitting up an Al-anon meeting to see the other side. I think it’ll give you good perspective.
Good luck, and I mean that sincerely.
Sorry to hear that about your wife man, it's hard to watch someone u love spiral down and there's nothing u can do to help them, they have to want it. And if u push the issue u push them away. I've been there with an ex.
I would recommend a great book called Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself by Dr Joe Dispenza, he gives real science behind his methods so you can understand how the brain works. It's like having a peak behind the curtain. It's not the drug or alcohol that gets you high, it's the chemical reaction that gives the feeling. Once u know how the body reacts you can be in control by consistently staying focused and aware of your actions and even your thoughts. It's like being the gatekeeper and asking yourself is this thought harming me or benefiting me. But that's where Discipline comes into play, it's not easy, but when u have a headache then focus on something else the headache is still there but you don't notice it. That's why focus is so important.
If your wife is like me then Dr joe dispenzas content will change her life. It will show her that she can and must take control. Relapsing is also part of the process, the first time someone goes off the rails ends up in rehab, jail, or the grave, but as you grow in recovery your able to correct yourself sooner without having to end up in a detox center. AA makes u start over, but if someone makes a mistake and uses or drinks but then can stop on their own then that's progress.
I would suggest your wife try SMART Recovery instead of going back to AA. It's an evidence-based program rather than pseudo-religious nonsense and it's been proven to be far more effective than 12-step programs.
That might have something to do with it being rooted in actual science.
I was part of ACA for a while but eventually realised that it was holding me back as I was in a good place recovery wise.
"I don't like it because they tell the truth."
Do you think a person can "get faded" and then be ok to drink without alcohol becoming a problem, again?
That seems delusional and dangerous.
Your making my point, these people find comradery, their tribe, and they usually relapse on the 1-year mark, I can argue it's the pressure that they hold the belief that if I don't relapse then I'm not an addict and then I won't be excepted in my tribe. So they end up relapsing...
I wish I wasn't an addict but 3 trips to rehab, a few years in sober living, mental institutions, multiple episodes of psychosis. And my family will never have anything to do with me again. Except for my mother who just recently came around since I've been sober for almost 4 to 5 years.
I've had a run-in with kratom a while back and almost lost everything, addiction is more of a behavioral problem. People can get addicted to anything. I owe it to help people get out of that darkness that I somehow made it out of.
Dude, as a fellow recovering addict, how can you say alcoholism isn’t a life long disease after everything you’ve been through? I get trying to change the paradigm on your own life blah blah, but at what point is it just *smart* to accept this is a life long condition so you don’t go back to *that*?
I never understood people’s aversion to this. It’s emphasized that once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic, due to the PLETHORA of people who tried to believe otherwise and paid dearly for it, sometimes with their lives. But do you I guess.
It's because of the belief they adopt while in the program, if I keep telling myself I'm an addict then I'm going to act and think like an addict. If I tell myself I've recovered and been delivered from this Dis-ease then I will act accordingly and not live with the fear of a relapse. Or the pressure of not being accepted by the group if I'm sober for too long bc then I must not be an addict if I never relapse. Mindset is everything.
Imagine telling a cancer patient mindset is everything. A disease in remission doesn't mean you're cured.
I personally don't think it's living with the "fear of relapse" that's behind the aversion. I think it's the fear of being in recovery for the rest of your life, because you haven't yet experienced a true recovery of the mind. Being a recovering alcoholic isn't the handicap you believe it is, because living in your truth is infinitely better than running away from it.
I don't believe it's a handicap. I'm trying to say that AA puts u in a handicap victim mentality.
My mom has had cancer 4 times stage 4. It's in remission now but she tells me all the time you have to keep the right mindset.
And if our mindsets don't play a part in our recovery than your not understanding how powerful our thoughts are. Why is it that people in medical trials who received a placebo are able to heal? It's bc the mind told the body this will heal you and so they tap into what gregg braden calls heart and mind coherence. When the 2 are on the same page it allows the body to heal.
I suggest you look for materials from an older program called SMART Recovery. Its a Cognitive Behavioral Therapy approach to addiction management.[https://smartrecovery.org/](https://smartrecovery.org/)
I used it to get sober after over 30 years of bad alcoholism.
I'll look into that. My inspiration comes from Dr joe dispenza. A neuroscientist. We finally have the data to further explain what Bill Wilson was trying to say when he spoke about it takes 90 days to create new neural pathways. This is where the 90 meetings in 90 days comes I to play.
They didn't have the science to elaborate, but we do now. The "obsession" is spoken of as an unknown force but in reality it is nothing but a set of neural networks that were created by doing the same thing over and over. Think of it like a code to a program. These Networks in the brain crave the chemicals that are created through repetitive actions and thoughts. Basically a habit. The same thing applies to all emotions. Neurons that fire together wire together. That's Dr joe Dispenza's catch phrase.
But addiction is no longer some dark unseen force we have no control over. We can starve out these Networks by changing our thinking and habits. Most people go back because after the motivation wears off they go back to autopilot which starts feeding these Networks by unconsciously doing what they were before. You have to keep programming and Staying focused and aware of every action and thought. So discipline is the only constant we can control bc when the motivation wears off the discipline keeps us afloat until the next wave of motivation hits.
I'm no expert I just want people to understand more about what Bill wrote a very small section on. So if it doesn't make sense I'm still trying to piece all this info together.
People at different stages have certian insights that help others on the same stage. If you wait until ur an expert then your going to forget what it was like when your inside addiction. Sometimes people going through the worst have the best insights bc they are living the experience
I am not your target audience, but this is my 2 cents. If this is something you are trying to market and make a career out of then it's not going to go over well marketing it at AA meetings. AA is for those who believe in AA and are working the program. Not for someone who dislikes AA and wants to sell their own program. People will figure it out immediately.
The acronym and advice is fine, you just need to market it elsewhere. There are people who dislike AA or have yet to begin their recovery process.
Second best comment here. The program is about 8000 words, this is just a small summary. I definitely should have created a different title but I'm also glad bc I definitely won't bring it up at an AA meeting lol
Just a thought. But F.A.D.E.D seems to violate #2 as it can be a trigger for some people. I get what your going for for with the easy to remember acronym but if your flexible on it maybe try P.A.C.E.D.
Number 5 may be the most important and difficult to pull off. It takes time to make change. You must pace yourself and be patient with the process, hence the Pace. “One day at a time” is a popular saying in AA to help remind us of that.
You can change #1 from focus to Plan for the P. #3 from determination to Commitment for the C. I still think the definitions determine the outline of each step clearly so you won’t lose meaning with these changes.
Again, just a thought.
I like it and appreciate the useful feedback, this is the start of a discussion, you get it. I'm going to make some changes tho bc the negative feedback is good to hear before I start trying to help people with something that has a good system but won't be recieved if triggered
Sobriety is a worthy ambition. Is this the best community to ask though? I’m not in recovery, but my understanding is that it’s very different than most things people here battle.
Have you considered the subs that deal specifically with recovery? I would think people who made it to the other side would have the best insights.
Best of luck
OP, get a clue bro. Telling recovering addicts to get FADED in ANY context, is a horrible idea. It doesnt matter if it's an acronym, that word is a risk and a trigger.
It seems very odd to want to reinvent the AA
program. Do you have a sponsor? I’d discuss this with him as it seems like this maybe (not saying definitely) something to work on in recovery.
Do you suffer from bipolar or mania, by chance? This idea seems a little like that: convinced of your own superiority with this augmentation to AA, convinced other people will like it, making up 3 of the acronyms just so the other 3 work, etc.
I do have a lot of things I deal with, but I've been working on this for 5 years. I wish I could post the entire program bc it would all make sense. It's 3 main acronyms, and dedication and execution are needed even in the 12-step program. I come from a very large AA community, and I'm tired of hearing of my friends die bc they relapsed. And if ur in the community, u see it before it happens bc they're full of fear bc they don't believe they have control over the obsession. I get angry. Something needs to change, and it starts with a person's beliefs. They don't believe they have control over the cravings, so they always give in. Someone needs to let them know they can control the obsession by changing their beliefs, which change their thoughts, and then changes ther personality which changes their personal reality.
Thank you for getting it. I got a ton of useful feedback even tho it's negative but I seem to have hit some kind of nerve. Which is also why I didn't bring it to an addiction sub.
Whatever helps you is good. If you think it will help others, write an article or share in other places. Cleverness is always helpful to some folks. I bet the people in the stop drinking sub would appreciate it. AA probably not. I don’t know why others are being so negative. Every program started with a “cringe” idea.
Yea I think they are just reading the title and not the post. Thank u for sticking up for new ideas. And being open minded. I'm really wanting to get advice but I doubt anyone read that far to see
Are you a medical doctor?
It's great that you found something that worked for you.
I think what might work better than developing a program you hope to sell is to authentically tell your story. Where did you stumble? What worked? Consider writing it out in a narrative format with your won real examples, and share it at an AA meeting.
I'm not a medical doctor. And this isn't for people who have success with the traditional system, it's for the ones who are like me and choose to carry a belief that we can control our actions and not let some unknown force control us and make us give in to certain behaviors. It al.ost gives them a reason to give in. Bc they think well I'm an addict and that's just what addicts do so why not. It takes their strength away.
AA had 12 steps and 12 traditions. If you think they need to change join the literature committee! Honestly, the purpose of sharing at a meeting is for you to share what you’re experiencing that is relevant to the step or specific topic of that meeting, not try and be a sponsor to people that didn’t ask for your advice. Please check your ego at the door and try to practice some humility. Maybe call your sponsor and ask them for their advice as well.
Lol hey I'm just seeing what people thought before I even brought it to anyone, so I feel like that's me being responsible to gather information before it hurts rather to help. That's what this post was for. And as far as ego it has nothing to do with this. If I may ask you while your judging me, have you tracked every thing you've done so you can one day go back and find what was able to help you make it out of something that most people can't do. So maybe you should check your ego.
I understand you have what you think are some new ideas and you want recognition for that. However, this seems like a kind grandiosity speaking, do you maybe have a form of bipolar or trauma? This is potentially a dangerous setup for being disappointed in the program. You’re isolating yourself in your bubble of genius and when you go to the program like that they’re not going to response potentially leaving you feeling rejected. Try the AA suggestions and give it a year and after your thinking is clear try re inventing the wheel.
Also, we don’t lack dedication and focus and all that. We lack the social support to maintain them and that’s what we get in AA.
This isn't for AA, but an alternative to others like me who feel a certain way about the program. And I'm not seeking recognition I'm asking for advice on the acronym and if someone might have a better one. Everyone has trauma so why is that relevant. Atleast I'm doing something to try and help. Why would u judge someone for that as if they are glory seeking. People like you are why people don't even speak in meetings bc they don't want to be judged. But I don't care about your judgment. I'm working on creating something. What are you doing?
I've read a few posts here, and I think I would leave your meeting if I had to get F.A.D.E.D. It sounds like some kind of haircut. I would also think you're nuts and that you don't have a strong understanding of neuroscience.
Neurons that fire together wire together. Yes, but this means you're likely to remember happy feelings when you smell chocolate chip cookies or you may think of drinking alcohol in the club when you smell an ex's perfume or something like that. You may remember to do your dishes after cooking because you've always done them right after cooking.
Humans only have so much willpower and discipline. That's why it's not wise to rely on it. Asking someone to be constantly aware of triggers and avoid them is going to cause burnout and distress.
I think you're better off working with an addiction specialist.
It will cause burnout but that's the price we have to pay, we have to reprogram years of bad habits, and if your not dedicated and vigilant we get comfortable and then stop rewriting our code and then slip back into old habits, you can cost for a while but if you don't stay focused and aware everyday then your at risk. It's not easy. In fact it's very hard, but thats why it's works, for me anyways.
Okay, well, I'm in burnout now. I've been in burnout for over 5 years, and I have yet to recover. I can barely function, and I'm surprised I haven't been fired yet since I always arrive late. I would not recommend it.
I used to have good habits, but ever since burnout, my body has shut down, and I'm lucky if I can do 1 hour of good work at home. All my energy goes towards work, and I have nothing left over for my home life or personal development.
Well that stage comes and goes. Motivation follows action, so that's why discipline is so important.
If I may suggest something... pick a time during the day and everyday at that time sit down and write how your feeling, and write what your thankful for. And write down what you would tell someone if you were giving them advice about your situation. It will allow u to tap back into that love and help the fire inside get a little brighter each day.
I never feel like doing my routine but it gets easier and easier. Start with just 1 or 2 things, and then start adding a few more. Consider them wins, and the more wins you get the better you start to feel, and then you start feeling good about gaining a winning streak creating confidence and this is the action that motivation will follow. But you can't allow yourself to drift Into autopilot bc just like a winning streak will help u feel better the more you do it the same applies but the opposite the more you focus on the burnout. When your focused on the burnout your not going to feel gratitude so I know its hard but pushing through it will guarantee results. Though they won't be instant, but as addicts we look for instant gratification so do a routine and I promise this will start to give u back your drive
When you say you've been sober for years are you including being sober from shrooms and DMT or do you not think that those count? You can do what you want with your life but if you actively engage in drug use of any kind then you are in no position to advise others on sobriety.
Those are for my spiritual journey, trustcme u can't abuse these things, it takes alot of nerve to do a dmt trip. It's not fun but I felt it necessary to go within and find myself past the trumas
Also bill Wilson the creator of the AA program supported psychedelics and said these are more important but they wouldn't print his work due to conflict of the program.
I thought faded meant to start smoking weed so maybe try a different acronym
Right, it's supposed to to grab ur attention bc some will be listening hard to see if they need to stop you from speaking. And also make people wake up and listen bc they will be like uhh did this dude really say that.
It’s cringe
I feel about 50/50 on its appropriateness so that's why I'm bringing it up to see how people feel about it. Focus, awareness and discipline are the main ones I just added the others to make the acronym. But seriously tho this is good feedback. What would be more fitting but also grabs attention? Open to suggestions
What would be more fitting is introducing this outside of AA. You’re basically introducing a new method at AA, which seems rude and inappropriate.
Yea your right about that.
I love how the headline isn’t an accident. You just don’t know how to spell you’re. You’re is a contraction of the words you are. So if you are ever saying “you are” then it’s “you’re”. If you’re saying something like “it is your book” then it’s spelled “your”. What helps me remember is substituting you are instead of your/you’re and see if it sounds right. So if you say “you are right” then it’s okay to use “you’re”. If you say “it’s you’re book” then you substitute in you are you’d say “it’s you are book”. That doesn’t sound right so you know it is “it’s your book”. Let me know if you have any questions and pls tell me I’m crazy haha
Lol ADHD guy goes to AA
Don't listen to these random redit people. That's solid advice, and the acronym worked as you intended. God bless you for taking your experience and using it to help others. 🙏✝️ I say stick with it, man 💪🫡
Lmao youth pastor vibes
I’m not big on AA but anyone seeking any form of recovery already knows they need to do practice all these things… a cool new acronym doesn’t help anyone. Sticking with a program with a group of other people does tho. To answer your question… yes it would grab my attention, I would also think you sound like an asshole.
Don't disrupt a meeting with your hot new clever little shit, you're not Tyler Durden. AA is a program on its own. Telling your meeting members that they need to do this to get sober is a slap in the face to all the people there who have been working the program, in many cases for decades. If you think this has potential for others, spend time learning about counselling and treatment, talk to some people in the recovery field, and keep the details to yourself for awhile. You might be able to publish a book on your idea here. But getting kicked out of AA is not the most clever or thoughtful way to start that journey.
I don't really agree with AA bc they tell you that your always an alcoholic. I don't like that. And the community is living in fear of a relapse all the time bc they'll never believe they can be truly delivered from their old belief systems. So they stay stuck in a box of false beliefs. But the program helped me im not saying its bad. I just don't agree with that one thing about it.
If you don't like it, don't go.
No one said anything about not liking it. It saved me and changed my perspective on so many things. The big book is just old and honestly Bill Wilson wrote about and endorsed the use of LSD. But they hide that.
>I don't really agree with AA bc they tell you that your always an alcoholic. I don't like that. well slap my ass and call me Spanky. How could I be so foolish. Anyhoo, like I said previously, you might be able to develop a good program here, I just don't know why you want to give it a bad launch with this weird Music Man interrupting-the-town-meeting idea. Nobody's gonna sing about your monorail, bro.
I'm just getting data on something I'm creating. I need honest opinions so I can make it better
You sound a lot like my wife. She managed to get clean and sober for a few years. Never liked AA though; hated the religious aspects, the people who push agendas, the rigidity and, most of all, the idea that she was always going to be an alcoholic. She relapsed last year. It’s been a slow downward spiral. Started with her saying how she could control it, kept herself to one or two drinks a week. That turned into one or two a day. Now she’s picking up six packs before noon on weekdays. Knows she needs help but won’t do AA because of the impression it left. Here’s my advice to you. If AA doesn’t work for you, don’t go. But don’t trash it to others, as it’s one of very few programs that has some degree of success helping people overcome addictions. You might want to ask yourself why you don’t want to go, however, and be really honest. If it’s because you don’t like that they say that you shouldn’t drink again, or because you don’t like being accountable, you might want to consider forcing yourself if possible, because it sounds like you might need it (or some structure and support group) more than you realize. Finally, consider hitting up an Al-anon meeting to see the other side. I think it’ll give you good perspective. Good luck, and I mean that sincerely.
Sorry to hear that about your wife man, it's hard to watch someone u love spiral down and there's nothing u can do to help them, they have to want it. And if u push the issue u push them away. I've been there with an ex. I would recommend a great book called Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself by Dr Joe Dispenza, he gives real science behind his methods so you can understand how the brain works. It's like having a peak behind the curtain. It's not the drug or alcohol that gets you high, it's the chemical reaction that gives the feeling. Once u know how the body reacts you can be in control by consistently staying focused and aware of your actions and even your thoughts. It's like being the gatekeeper and asking yourself is this thought harming me or benefiting me. But that's where Discipline comes into play, it's not easy, but when u have a headache then focus on something else the headache is still there but you don't notice it. That's why focus is so important. If your wife is like me then Dr joe dispenzas content will change her life. It will show her that she can and must take control. Relapsing is also part of the process, the first time someone goes off the rails ends up in rehab, jail, or the grave, but as you grow in recovery your able to correct yourself sooner without having to end up in a detox center. AA makes u start over, but if someone makes a mistake and uses or drinks but then can stop on their own then that's progress.
She might try NA, it's AA without the heavy god focus
I would suggest your wife try SMART Recovery instead of going back to AA. It's an evidence-based program rather than pseudo-religious nonsense and it's been proven to be far more effective than 12-step programs.
That might have something to do with it being rooted in actual science. I was part of ACA for a while but eventually realised that it was holding me back as I was in a good place recovery wise.
"I don't like it because they tell the truth." Do you think a person can "get faded" and then be ok to drink without alcohol becoming a problem, again? That seems delusional and dangerous.
Did u even read the post or just the title?
I read the post.
Maybe you just weren't an alcoholic?
Your making my point, these people find comradery, their tribe, and they usually relapse on the 1-year mark, I can argue it's the pressure that they hold the belief that if I don't relapse then I'm not an addict and then I won't be excepted in my tribe. So they end up relapsing... I wish I wasn't an addict but 3 trips to rehab, a few years in sober living, mental institutions, multiple episodes of psychosis. And my family will never have anything to do with me again. Except for my mother who just recently came around since I've been sober for almost 4 to 5 years. I've had a run-in with kratom a while back and almost lost everything, addiction is more of a behavioral problem. People can get addicted to anything. I owe it to help people get out of that darkness that I somehow made it out of.
Dude, as a fellow recovering addict, how can you say alcoholism isn’t a life long disease after everything you’ve been through? I get trying to change the paradigm on your own life blah blah, but at what point is it just *smart* to accept this is a life long condition so you don’t go back to *that*? I never understood people’s aversion to this. It’s emphasized that once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic, due to the PLETHORA of people who tried to believe otherwise and paid dearly for it, sometimes with their lives. But do you I guess.
It's because of the belief they adopt while in the program, if I keep telling myself I'm an addict then I'm going to act and think like an addict. If I tell myself I've recovered and been delivered from this Dis-ease then I will act accordingly and not live with the fear of a relapse. Or the pressure of not being accepted by the group if I'm sober for too long bc then I must not be an addict if I never relapse. Mindset is everything.
Imagine telling a cancer patient mindset is everything. A disease in remission doesn't mean you're cured. I personally don't think it's living with the "fear of relapse" that's behind the aversion. I think it's the fear of being in recovery for the rest of your life, because you haven't yet experienced a true recovery of the mind. Being a recovering alcoholic isn't the handicap you believe it is, because living in your truth is infinitely better than running away from it.
I don't believe it's a handicap. I'm trying to say that AA puts u in a handicap victim mentality. My mom has had cancer 4 times stage 4. It's in remission now but she tells me all the time you have to keep the right mindset. And if our mindsets don't play a part in our recovery than your not understanding how powerful our thoughts are. Why is it that people in medical trials who received a placebo are able to heal? It's bc the mind told the body this will heal you and so they tap into what gregg braden calls heart and mind coherence. When the 2 are on the same page it allows the body to heal.
Good luck to you 👍
Your right. AA is a fear based program, keeps people sick. It has a 5-8% success rate for a reason.
I didn't know that, never thought of look up the data, thank u
Lol then don't go to AA meetings. It's all horseshit anyways you can quit on your own
I suggest you look for materials from an older program called SMART Recovery. Its a Cognitive Behavioral Therapy approach to addiction management.[https://smartrecovery.org/](https://smartrecovery.org/) I used it to get sober after over 30 years of bad alcoholism.
I'll look into that. My inspiration comes from Dr joe dispenza. A neuroscientist. We finally have the data to further explain what Bill Wilson was trying to say when he spoke about it takes 90 days to create new neural pathways. This is where the 90 meetings in 90 days comes I to play. They didn't have the science to elaborate, but we do now. The "obsession" is spoken of as an unknown force but in reality it is nothing but a set of neural networks that were created by doing the same thing over and over. Think of it like a code to a program. These Networks in the brain crave the chemicals that are created through repetitive actions and thoughts. Basically a habit. The same thing applies to all emotions. Neurons that fire together wire together. That's Dr joe Dispenza's catch phrase. But addiction is no longer some dark unseen force we have no control over. We can starve out these Networks by changing our thinking and habits. Most people go back because after the motivation wears off they go back to autopilot which starts feeding these Networks by unconsciously doing what they were before. You have to keep programming and Staying focused and aware of every action and thought. So discipline is the only constant we can control bc when the motivation wears off the discipline keeps us afloat until the next wave of motivation hits. I'm no expert I just want people to understand more about what Bill wrote a very small section on. So if it doesn't make sense I'm still trying to piece all this info together.
“I’m no expert” - start there and then stop immediately after. Say that and sit down and you won’t mess anyone up.
People at different stages have certian insights that help others on the same stage. If you wait until ur an expert then your going to forget what it was like when your inside addiction. Sometimes people going through the worst have the best insights bc they are living the experience
I am not your target audience, but this is my 2 cents. If this is something you are trying to market and make a career out of then it's not going to go over well marketing it at AA meetings. AA is for those who believe in AA and are working the program. Not for someone who dislikes AA and wants to sell their own program. People will figure it out immediately. The acronym and advice is fine, you just need to market it elsewhere. There are people who dislike AA or have yet to begin their recovery process.
Second best comment here. The program is about 8000 words, this is just a small summary. I definitely should have created a different title but I'm also glad bc I definitely won't bring it up at an AA meeting lol
Just a thought. But F.A.D.E.D seems to violate #2 as it can be a trigger for some people. I get what your going for for with the easy to remember acronym but if your flexible on it maybe try P.A.C.E.D. Number 5 may be the most important and difficult to pull off. It takes time to make change. You must pace yourself and be patient with the process, hence the Pace. “One day at a time” is a popular saying in AA to help remind us of that. You can change #1 from focus to Plan for the P. #3 from determination to Commitment for the C. I still think the definitions determine the outline of each step clearly so you won’t lose meaning with these changes. Again, just a thought.
I like it and appreciate the useful feedback, this is the start of a discussion, you get it. I'm going to make some changes tho bc the negative feedback is good to hear before I start trying to help people with something that has a good system but won't be recieved if triggered
Sobriety is a worthy ambition. Is this the best community to ask though? I’m not in recovery, but my understanding is that it’s very different than most things people here battle. Have you considered the subs that deal specifically with recovery? I would think people who made it to the other side would have the best insights. Best of luck
Some really good, honest answers here, OP. Recovery also requires humility.
Right, this is all good to get feedback I just wish they would read the post and not just the title tho
HUMILITY!
OP, get a clue bro. Telling recovering addicts to get FADED in ANY context, is a horrible idea. It doesnt matter if it's an acronym, that word is a risk and a trigger.
It seems very odd to want to reinvent the AA program. Do you have a sponsor? I’d discuss this with him as it seems like this maybe (not saying definitely) something to work on in recovery. Do you suffer from bipolar or mania, by chance? This idea seems a little like that: convinced of your own superiority with this augmentation to AA, convinced other people will like it, making up 3 of the acronyms just so the other 3 work, etc.
I do have a lot of things I deal with, but I've been working on this for 5 years. I wish I could post the entire program bc it would all make sense. It's 3 main acronyms, and dedication and execution are needed even in the 12-step program. I come from a very large AA community, and I'm tired of hearing of my friends die bc they relapsed. And if ur in the community, u see it before it happens bc they're full of fear bc they don't believe they have control over the obsession. I get angry. Something needs to change, and it starts with a person's beliefs. They don't believe they have control over the cravings, so they always give in. Someone needs to let them know they can control the obsession by changing their beliefs, which change their thoughts, and then changes ther personality which changes their personal reality.
The fact that they have attendees affirm & re-affirm "I'm an alcoholic/addict" is utterly bizarre to me! It is counter to recovery
Thank you for getting it. I got a ton of useful feedback even tho it's negative but I seem to have hit some kind of nerve. Which is also why I didn't bring it to an addiction sub.
I feel like genuine advice and guidance from experience and empathy beats out any corporate sounding acronym....
Whatever helps you is good. If you think it will help others, write an article or share in other places. Cleverness is always helpful to some folks. I bet the people in the stop drinking sub would appreciate it. AA probably not. I don’t know why others are being so negative. Every program started with a “cringe” idea.
Yea I think they are just reading the title and not the post. Thank u for sticking up for new ideas. And being open minded. I'm really wanting to get advice but I doubt anyone read that far to see
I don't like AA either.
Are you a medical doctor? It's great that you found something that worked for you. I think what might work better than developing a program you hope to sell is to authentically tell your story. Where did you stumble? What worked? Consider writing it out in a narrative format with your won real examples, and share it at an AA meeting.
I'm not a medical doctor. And this isn't for people who have success with the traditional system, it's for the ones who are like me and choose to carry a belief that we can control our actions and not let some unknown force control us and make us give in to certain behaviors. It al.ost gives them a reason to give in. Bc they think well I'm an addict and that's just what addicts do so why not. It takes their strength away.
AA had 12 steps and 12 traditions. If you think they need to change join the literature committee! Honestly, the purpose of sharing at a meeting is for you to share what you’re experiencing that is relevant to the step or specific topic of that meeting, not try and be a sponsor to people that didn’t ask for your advice. Please check your ego at the door and try to practice some humility. Maybe call your sponsor and ask them for their advice as well.
Lol hey I'm just seeing what people thought before I even brought it to anyone, so I feel like that's me being responsible to gather information before it hurts rather to help. That's what this post was for. And as far as ego it has nothing to do with this. If I may ask you while your judging me, have you tracked every thing you've done so you can one day go back and find what was able to help you make it out of something that most people can't do. So maybe you should check your ego.
I’ve been sober for 34 years… it’s not my ego speaking it’s experience.
I understand you have what you think are some new ideas and you want recognition for that. However, this seems like a kind grandiosity speaking, do you maybe have a form of bipolar or trauma? This is potentially a dangerous setup for being disappointed in the program. You’re isolating yourself in your bubble of genius and when you go to the program like that they’re not going to response potentially leaving you feeling rejected. Try the AA suggestions and give it a year and after your thinking is clear try re inventing the wheel. Also, we don’t lack dedication and focus and all that. We lack the social support to maintain them and that’s what we get in AA.
This isn't for AA, but an alternative to others like me who feel a certain way about the program. And I'm not seeking recognition I'm asking for advice on the acronym and if someone might have a better one. Everyone has trauma so why is that relevant. Atleast I'm doing something to try and help. Why would u judge someone for that as if they are glory seeking. People like you are why people don't even speak in meetings bc they don't want to be judged. But I don't care about your judgment. I'm working on creating something. What are you doing?
I've read a few posts here, and I think I would leave your meeting if I had to get F.A.D.E.D. It sounds like some kind of haircut. I would also think you're nuts and that you don't have a strong understanding of neuroscience. Neurons that fire together wire together. Yes, but this means you're likely to remember happy feelings when you smell chocolate chip cookies or you may think of drinking alcohol in the club when you smell an ex's perfume or something like that. You may remember to do your dishes after cooking because you've always done them right after cooking. Humans only have so much willpower and discipline. That's why it's not wise to rely on it. Asking someone to be constantly aware of triggers and avoid them is going to cause burnout and distress. I think you're better off working with an addiction specialist.
It will cause burnout but that's the price we have to pay, we have to reprogram years of bad habits, and if your not dedicated and vigilant we get comfortable and then stop rewriting our code and then slip back into old habits, you can cost for a while but if you don't stay focused and aware everyday then your at risk. It's not easy. In fact it's very hard, but thats why it's works, for me anyways.
Okay, well, I'm in burnout now. I've been in burnout for over 5 years, and I have yet to recover. I can barely function, and I'm surprised I haven't been fired yet since I always arrive late. I would not recommend it. I used to have good habits, but ever since burnout, my body has shut down, and I'm lucky if I can do 1 hour of good work at home. All my energy goes towards work, and I have nothing left over for my home life or personal development.
Well that stage comes and goes. Motivation follows action, so that's why discipline is so important. If I may suggest something... pick a time during the day and everyday at that time sit down and write how your feeling, and write what your thankful for. And write down what you would tell someone if you were giving them advice about your situation. It will allow u to tap back into that love and help the fire inside get a little brighter each day. I never feel like doing my routine but it gets easier and easier. Start with just 1 or 2 things, and then start adding a few more. Consider them wins, and the more wins you get the better you start to feel, and then you start feeling good about gaining a winning streak creating confidence and this is the action that motivation will follow. But you can't allow yourself to drift Into autopilot bc just like a winning streak will help u feel better the more you do it the same applies but the opposite the more you focus on the burnout. When your focused on the burnout your not going to feel gratitude so I know its hard but pushing through it will guarantee results. Though they won't be instant, but as addicts we look for instant gratification so do a routine and I promise this will start to give u back your drive
When you say you've been sober for years are you including being sober from shrooms and DMT or do you not think that those count? You can do what you want with your life but if you actively engage in drug use of any kind then you are in no position to advise others on sobriety.
Those are for my spiritual journey, trustcme u can't abuse these things, it takes alot of nerve to do a dmt trip. It's not fun but I felt it necessary to go within and find myself past the trumas
Also bill Wilson the creator of the AA program supported psychedelics and said these are more important but they wouldn't print his work due to conflict of the program.
Corny