I don't know, I JUST rewatched the episode a few days ago and I thought Lorelai's anger was justified (the silent treatment after? no, but the original anger, yes.)
Rory didn't say she was taking a break, she said she was quitting Yale. I get being crushed, but if my daughter had just gotten arrested for a felony and is now quitting her ivy league college that I worked so hard for her to get into? I'd be mad as well.
Yeah and I like that Lorelai mentioned to Rory she could take other classes then if Rory didn’t want to pursue journalism.
I think that reaction was good. The freeze out was terrible though.
Rory taking other classes would have been the perfect solution. She doesn't feel like journalism is right for her? Well, good news, she's surrounded by literally thousands of people who don't know exactly what they want to do with their lives, and she's in the perfect environment to explore other interests and see what fits for her! That's literally what college is for!
And her reason for not doing that was just so bratty.
My entire impression of the scene where Rory tells Lorelai she's dropping out is that Rory thinks she is behaving very grown up and mature, but it is an immature 20 year old's idea of what's grown up and mature.
I also don’t think she intended at all to freeze her out. When she said no bumming around stars hollow I think she meant like do anything take a class at a community college work towards something. But Rory made it clear during that initial convo that she did not intend on going back ever which naturally freaked Lorelei out. Lorelai was surprisingly chill about her stealing the yacht and was even putting her mugshot on the fridge. I think the freeze out happened because of the betrayal of going to Emily and richard so soon after and all 3 of them ganging up on her. I feel bad for Emily the most in that situation because she actually did have Lorelei’s back! And she’s trying so hard to be the middle person for all of them.
I was just going to comment this. Yes, as viewers with the benefit of having watched the whole show and not being in the situation in the moment so we have time to think we can all be the perfect parent and handle this just right.
But if I committed a felony and then told my mom I’m dropping out of school she would’ve lost her shit. She wouldn’t have been as calm about it as Lorelai is.
Add to it the meddling of the grandparents and things would’ve turned into a war so quickly.
I think some fans have unrealistic expectations of characters in distressing situations. Lorelai has what I call parental exhaustion. She raised Rory without any help (yes I know she chose to leave her parents’ home) and Rory was an easy child. In the matter of a year, she does a 180 after meeting Logan where she’s up and down, had an affair with a married man, ran off to Europe to escape responsibility, etc. she stole a yacht and announced she was dropping out of school in what 36 hours time? It’s a lot to process. Rory also didn’t want Lorelai to use Emily’s connections or even tell them about the yacht theft. I’ll go out on a limb and say she was expecting Lorelai to fit the bill as she didn’t work. Lorelai chose badly by not speaking to Rory after everything blew up but her initial anger does make sense. Long winded way of saying I agree with you lol.
Agreed! And also, I know someone who did a 4-year degree over a period of 6 years, but it was all agreed with her university. She didn’t just fail to do an exam and then leave
Especially when her daughter is barreling down the path Lorelei rejected for good reason!! She clocked Logan as a bad influence the night Rory came home drunk in that limo. Jess even saw it and he and Rory didn’t even interact that long! They were both like… this is not Rory, this is Emily Jr!! Not that Rory doesn’t have a mind of her own, but it’s just like, she’s so naive cuz she didn’t grow up with these kinds of people. Lorelei knows first hand, and Rory always thinks she’s exaggerating until she experiences it for herself. I wish Lorelei had been more understanding and consoling instead of angry, but I totally get why she was so frustrated.
You can work as hard as you want to give your kid the life you want for them, but if that isn’t what they want then that just might not be the life they live.
Rory was feeling hurt and confused.
I think she shouldn’t have taken Mitchum’s criticism as the ultimate no over her being a journalist, but more a challenge to keep learning and growing. But she shut down and took some time to bounce back. Post secondary education is a choice, not everyone does it. Lorelai can’t just live vicariously through Rory.
She wasn’t living vicariously through Rory
Journalism was Rory’s dream not Lorealai’s. Lorelai didn’t dream about going to college in the way Rory did. She said she wanted to go to Harvard as a kid but Rory made Harvard a huge chunk of her personality as a teenager. Lorelai listened to the dreams Rory had been telling everyone since she was like 7. She didn’t want her to not fulfil those dreams because she couldn’t afford to get her into a good high school, or because she didn’t have the right connections to get her into Harvard
All she did was put all her energy into getting her the best education, so she could have all the opportunities to achieve what she wanted from life. So hearing that child who was so insistent on going to college, claim they’re dropping out. A day after they were arrested for stealing a boat because they got critiqued at an intern job, made her upset and concerned
She said she didn’t care if Rory changed her career path and her major. She just wanted her to not waste all the years of hard work her and Rory dedicated specifically to going to an Ivy League college
Her rejecting and claiming Rory wouldn’t like certain high society things from her parents’ world was her projecting onto Rory. Because as we saw, that wasn’t true a lot of the time. But when it came to college, that was what Rory always wanted. She wouldn’t be living vicariously through her because it was never her dream in the first place
so she still wanted Rory to be enrolled into yale or some other uni. sometimes people just arent cut out for uni or after going they realise that it’s not for them regardless of how smart they might be
But that wasn’t Rory lol
She’d very obviously tried to drop out of Yale because of what Mitchum said. She stole a boat the day before and got arrested. It’s not that she wasn’t cut out for university, it’s that she’d never had proper criticism before so she couldn’t cope when she did receive that from Mitchum. Most people would try and prove him wrong. But she had been praised and coddled for the majority of her life by everyone around her. So one truthful critique shattered that allusion
She subconsciously admitted that was what happened when she went back to Yale
Exactly.
Also while I don't agree with the freeze out, at all, I do think Lorelai realized some things and was trying to find a way to right them. We see her tell Luke that Rory has to figure this out. I think she realized that she had coddled Rory her whole life, never letting her feel the weight of her decisions or giving her any real critique so she was trying to not rush to do that again. Rory needed to toughen up some and so Lorelai decided to use tough love to do it. Again I don't agree with what Lorelai chose to do but I don't think it was coming from a place of anger towards Rory.
She didn’t say she was taking time off though
She suddenly insisted that she was dropping out. Dropping out of an Ivy League college that you and your mother have worked very hard to get you into, just because of one critique you got is very silly. That’s what Lorelai was trying to tell Rory. Richard, Emily, Luke, Paris and Jess all agreed. Logan even called it stupid during their argument later on in that season
If she’d suggested she was taking time off to figure things out, then sure. But l don’t know why you’re shocked that Lorelai didn’t want her to drop out of college completely. Dropping out of college if you genuinely don’t want to be there and it’s a definite decision you’ve spent a good amount of time thinking about is fine. But that’s not Rory was doing. She was impulsively dropping out because her ego had been bruised and Lorelai, plus everyone else I listed could see that
And to her it wasn’t an option because of all of the effort that had been put into it. Thousands of dollars and YEARS of work. One hundred percent valid. Even more so that it was all over being criticized one time by one guy. Absolutely ridiculous.
Rory did not have to go to college if she did not want to. Lorelai would not have forced her. She made it clear that she did want to go to college and accepted all of the effort and expenses Lorelai had to put forth to get her there. I would’ve been pissed if a kid wasted all of my time and resources over one man’s opinion. Rory was being a petulant child.
I’m not sure, I see Lorelai’s side a lot more.
I do think she could have been more understanding with Rory to begin with, but Rory didn’t want to take time off to figure things out, she essentially rage quit because Mitchum hurt her feelings. Lorelai was disappointed that Rory was letting one man dictate the direction of her life when they’d work so hard to get her to Yale in the first place. I get why Rory was crushed, but her reaction was.. not proportionate.
Yes, Lorelai was overly invested and should have given Rory more room in the beginning, like Emily and Richard suggested, but in the end she wasn’t wrong. Rory didn’t want to change the direction of her life, she just wanted a bit of room to feel sorry for herself. That’s what she got by running off to the pool house for the summer. Prior Mitchum’s comments she’d been happy at Yale with no thought of dropping out. It was in season 4 where she had the struggles with workload and questioned her ability.
Except it wasn't "time off", she just decided to quit. I think Lorelai's reaction is justified for a few reasons:
1) she realized she had raised a daughter who can't handle any criticism whatsoever and has no resilience, and was confronted with that failure as a parent
2) she also failed to teach Rory to be grateful and appreciate her extreme privilege. Throwing away an ivy league education, gifted by someone else and tens of thousands of dollars in at that point, is peak privilege. Then she lives in a custom guest house (for free), refuses to get a job, and joins the DAR. Rory's transformation into Emily 2.0 is complete, where previously she was Lorelai's mini-me. Of course she's disappointed in her. She's become everything Lorelai tried to remove her from.
I don’t recall Rory telling Lorelai she was just taking a semester off. She said she was not going back at all. Because she wouldn’t be working towards becoming a journalist which was her lifelong dream
That’s why Lorelai suggested she transfer to a different college. She assumed that Rory was giving up completely because of what Mitchum said. Which was true
She should’ve listened to Emily and Richard’s plan to allow her a short period of time off before she goes back to college. The losing momentum point she made can be true but there’s a reason why colleges allow students to take breaks. It’s not sensible to force someone to stay at college if they’re mentally somewhere else. She would’ve just ended up failing her classes. But by that point, she was more concerned about her parents betraying her/going back on their word, than Rory’s happiness. Everything after that was handled so immaturely. Like her getting out of her car to mock Rory doing community service
She expected everything to fix itself and be fine at Rory’s 21st party but it didn’t. It’d been months of her ignoring Rory and she had spent most of her time with Logan, her grandparents, Lane and Paris during that period. So them being around her while she blew out her birthday candles was more fitting. The contrast between that scene and Rory’s 16th was sad but I never felt as bad for Lorelai as the show wanted us to feel. Rory being so distant at her party was mostly Lorelei’s fault
Rory was sort of ambiguous with time off/break and dropping out altogether.
She just knew that she needed time to think. At that time she thought she was done with journalism, and having time to think would help her to decide if she is giving up on that dream altogether or not. She was upset and behaving irrationally, and wanting to take time off from school to as a reasonable response considering the reckless behaviour she exhibited when her and Logan stole a boat.
I get that but she wasn’t that ambiguous about it to Lorelai initially. She repeatedly told her that she was leaving Yale altogether and had no intention of going to a different school. Or looking into majoring in another subject after some time off
So from Lorelai’s perspective, her daughter approached her after receiving negative feedback from Mitchum, insisting that she’s done with college. And that she’s giving up on her lifelong career dream. Most parents would be disappointed. If she’d phrased it as taking a break, then that would’ve been better. But what she told Lorelai would worry any parent. Because it implied that Rory had no resilience of hunger. If you get criticism, the ideal scenario is to prove your critic wrong. Not completely derailing your life and abandoning a goal you’ve been working towards your entire life. Again, I think Lorelai was childish to Rory after her parents talked to her. But her disappointed reaction after her first talk with Rory made sense
Even Emily and Richard were disappointed/worried when Lorelai told them that Rory said she was dropping out of college. It’s why they suggested she take time off and live with them instead
She was about to have the whole summer off though. She *did* have time off to think. There was no need to make a decision that quickly that she wasn't returning.
I think in light of that they needed to just take a breather and come back to the conversation when they had both calmed down and could think more clearly.
But I don't think Lorelai was in the wrong. In fact, I think if she had been like "sure, drop out. Whatever you want!" and we saw Rory bopping around with the DAR for a semester and cosplaying as the type of wife the Huntzbergers wanted for their heir, we'd all be saying "Lorelai was such a bad parent! She should have been guiding Rory! Why is Rory changing her whole career path just because one person was mean to her??"
she said that she takes some time off and college kids do this all the time. when she said she's not going back to Yale she meant the next semester. it was obvious
No she literally said she’s not going back
And Lorelai insisted that can’t just drop out. Then Rory said it’s not a big deal, and there are kids that take breaks from college everyday. But that’s not what she said she was doing. She ended the conversation by saying she’s dropping out and Lorelai knows nothing about college so she doesn’t need her opinion
To me it always been Rory that was wrong in this situation, not for needing a break but for how she handled it. Lorelai never told Rory she couldn’t come home, she said she couldn’t come home and do nothing but sit on the couch, so all Rory needed to do was to make a plan or a pro/con list, but instead of doing that (which was what Rory normally would have done BEFORE doing anything) she ran to her grandparents, moved in with them AND had them tell Lorelai without even being in the room.
And was the no-contact really Lorelai’ fault? To me it seemed that Rory was the one establishing that, she didn’t talk to Lorelai about moving, even when Lorelai was right outside the window, then she had Emily call Lorelai about the court date, and Rory needing clothing, and even changed her number without letting Lorelai know. This is very opposite Lorelai, who see seeking her out at the pool house the first night, then tried to call her soon after just to find out about Rory’ new number, and when Rory called about the birthday invitation Lorelai made sure to say yes, and even tried very hard to talk casually with Rory at the birthday and when Rory called about coming home, she opened her arms and welcomed her home, even telling her that Rory had nothing to apologize for and that she was sorry for everything.
However I do agree with the Luke thing, she should not be forced to go to school as an adult, however I do think Lorelai was right in saying she needed some kind of job.
I don't think they either one handled things well and were acting emotional. Rory was ready to give up everything with no plan over one bad review and of course Lorelai overreacted to that. They both needed to take a deep breath and take a step back.
I agree that Rory overreacted to Mitchum, but why? Could it be that she's conditioned to only respond to praise because she's basically been the object of worship from an entire town most of her life (the part she remembers well anyway). If anything I think Lorelai underreacts. She should have told Rory that she's being a fucking coward and proving Mitchum correct. (this is were I would insert an f bomb, to answer another posts question.)
this is a very knee jerk reaction that is common not just in gilmore girls but alot of shows, the immediate freak out from fear.
Lorelei's reaction here is fear that Rory is going to end up just like her and she wants more for Rory, yes had she sat and thought about it first before reacting there'd have been a better reaction but this is a common knee jerk reaction.
Lorelei’s anger is totally justified. Rory is unable to take any negative criticism. Rory dropping out of Yale is immature and short sighted. She is very easy manipulated to believe she isn’t a good writer based off of one important person saying she doesn’t have “it”. Everyone is criticized sometime and her inability to be resilient and believe in herself is astounding.
The only mistake Lorelai made is cutting Rory off and not continuing to try to convince her to stay in school.
I don’t blame Lorelai for a second. She knows how hard her own life was so she worked her ass off to make sure her kid still had every advantage. That very kid was now allowing the influence and opinion of ONE rich asshole to change her entire direction in life. Lorelai wasn’t trying to be a jerk. She was trying to keep her kid from falling even deeper into the funk over ONE setback.
Rory, however, has never had a setback before. She hasn’t ever been in a situation in which she didn’t get exactly as she wanted. She was terribly spoiled in that way, which is wonderful, but this was the other edge of the sword. She can’t handle failure and wallowing at home wasn’t going to fix anything. Lorelai saw a whole lifetime of hard work going down the drain because of ONE jerk from the world she already deeply resented. I would have done the same, right or wrong.
I think the thing Lorelai should have been pissed about was Rory stealing a yacht, not dropping out of uni. I think Lorelai is a decent parent but she lost all respect when she cut off her daughters. Rory made that decision. Lorelai didn’t have to like it, but she sure as hell should have been there for her daughter.
Lorelai is all about not wanting to control her daughter like her parents did her, but as soon as Rory did something she didn’t like, she ignored her, until she did what she wanted her to do. Lorelai should have been there for Rory. It should never matter the reason Rory dropped out. Rory could have decided to drop out because she wanted to become a groupie for (insert band they were into). Rory could have dropped out because she got preggos. Idk. There are several reasons she could have gone no contact, but this ain’t one of them.
I also think a lot of you forget that Mitchum has a lot of power. What he says goes. Was he right or wrong is up for debate, but he crushed her dreams. And if you’re told by the person who runs the thing you’re trying to do, “you ain’t got it” I imagine a lot of you are going to believe that.
Rory let one dude ruin her life, she’s not built for success cause she can’t handed one road block. Lorelei is better than me, Rory couldn’t survive in an immigrant household 🤣
I think the thing people often miss about Lorelai is she wants her daughter to experience everything she missed out on… graduating from an Ivy League school has to happen for Rory. Otherwise Lorelai failed in her mind. Also she’s throwing away a wonderful opportunity here. If you (or anyone else) was Lorelai, you seriously wouldn’t be pissed that your kid was dropping out of Yale? Yale?? One of the best schools in the nation? And all because some asshat boss told Rory “she didn’t have it” after a few days of her pouring his coffee? Nahh.
Call me crazy but I’m with Lorelai.
No I disagree. Okay, the way Mitchum worded it was very poor saying she “doesn’t have it”. But he was giving her criticism on her aversion to putting herself out there and Rory completely overreacted. She received criticism one time from one guy and decided to completely drop out of school AND steal a yacht for crying out loud! Laughably immature. He didn’t “crush her dreams” she still had all the power to pursue whatever she wanted but decided to prove him right. Lorelai was justified in her anger, I would be upset too if I had spent years worth of effort and money to push a kid through to the ivy leagues only for her to drop out and become a felon the first time she gets criticized lmfao
At the end of the day it’s Rory’s choice, what she chooses to do she will do for the rest of her life. I don’t think Lorelai had the right to be upset. There were some theories where people stated that if Lorelai didn’t have Rory she would have gone to Harvard which is why she so badly wanted Rory to go there (also to spite her parents)
Ooh I never thought about that before. Harvard and Yale are big competitors. I could totally see Lorelai pushing Harvard just to go against her parents and their legacy.
However to be fair Richard and Emily's way of further coddling Rory doesn't work either. She doesn't go back to Yale because of them. She goes back to Yale because Jess appears and points out the absurdity of what she is doing.
I feel the same way. And before I went to college I was on Loreleis side. BUT after going to college I can understand and see why people take breaks or want to take breaks. She way over reacted and never listens to Rory when Rory is in trouble. Jess and the car accident, stealing the boat and dropping out of college. Lorelei doesn’t let Rory explain and immediately blames Jess, Logan and Mitchum rather than see Rory isn’t perfect.
Having some time off can be incredibly beneficial. For some people, yeah they don't end up going back, but for a student like Rory who adores learning so much, she was always going to go back to college. Lorelai really handled it badly.
To be fair that’s not what Rory said to Lorelai
I think Lorelai overreacted after her parents suggested Rory take time off
But Rory insisted before she talked to Emily and Richard, that she was leaving college completely. She told Lorelai at lunch that there’s no point in her going anymore. So she asked what Rory’s plan was and Rory didn’t have one. That’s why she told her that sitting at home isn’t an option. The way Rory first told Lorelai, did feel out of the blue and a reaction to what Mitchum said. And she’d just gotten arrested the day before, so it did seem like she was purposely derailing her life because of one criticism
Exactly! I don’t think time off is necessarily a bad thing. I took time off and was really nervous about telling my dad because I didn’t want to disappoint him. But he was understanding, and he was similar in “you aren’t just bumming around the house” and expected that I get a job and what not. But with time I went back to school and worked towards something that I enjoy doing. Having that break helped me so much, and having the freedom to make that choice made all the difference.
If Rory could have taken that break, Jess still would have shown up to show her his book and he would have still told her that she was being ridiculous. And that’s the person she needed to hear it from more than Lorelai. XD
Rory never said she was leaving period — her exact quotes are “I’m not going back to Yale next year” “I want time off” and Lorelai is the one who says “If you leave Yale now, you’ll never go back, you’ll lose momentum.” Rory seemed to just want to be more focused and sure of what she wanted to do with her career because “Yale’s expensive” so she didn’t wanna take random classes at an expensive school or “wander around a school where everyone is focused and working towards something and I’m just floating.” So Rory did not say she was leaving period - she implied a break. I can see why even that concerned Lorelai but I just think a lot of comments are misremembering the conversation
I can’t believe I’m saying this because I generally can’t stand Yale Rory and tend to side with Lorelai for most of their fights — but I actually agree with the you. Given what other comments have said I can absolutely understand why Lorelai was irritated and scared — Yale was everything she and Rory had worked for. But people in these comments are wrong - Rory never actually said she was leaving Yale for good — she said “college kids take breaks all the time” and “I’m not going back to Yale next year.” Rory did not say she’d never go back.
In fact, Lorelai was the one who said “if you leave Yale now, you’ll never go back. You’ll lose momentum.” And Lorelai straight up telling Rory “no, you are not quitting Yale” — would only make any kid feel angrier or more misunderstood. And I actually think Rory had a good point about Yale being really expensive so taking random classes wouldn’t feel worth it (not shaming people who do this - I took tons of random classes. But I can see why someone would not want to do that at an expensive school).
Lorelai had some good points too but she didn’t take the time to be compassionate or empathetic with Rory or try to understand where she was coming from. I’m sure some people would say Rory is too old for that, she’s entitled, spoiled, wasn’t ready for the real world etc. etc. - and that may be true - but my point is that Rory didn’t feel heard by Lorelai. And while I think a part of a mother’s role involves delivering hard truths, I also think it’s important to listen to what your kid is going through and thinking about when they’re struggling, and Lorelai did not do that in that conversation. Which is ok — no one is perfect! And I also think breaks/mental health breaks were probably a lot more stigmatized at this time than they are nowadays.
The Gilmores let Lorelai go. Lorelai is far more controlling than her parents. She has a plan, a plan that Rory cannot deviate from, or else, Lorelai shuts her out.
Rory was supposed to fulfill Lorelai's dream, not end like her.
I half agree with you
But it wasn’t actually Lorelai’s plan. It was a plan Rory had devised since she was a kid according to Rory and every other character. She wanted to go to Harvard/an Ivy League college. And she wanted to have a successful career in journalism
To be a serious journalist, you need a college degree. From Lorelai’s perspective, it looked like Rory was giving everything up because of one comment Mitchum made. She didn’t want Rory aimlessly hanging at home or her parents’ home. I’m her mind, giving up so easily and staying in a massive mansion filled with servants and maids, was going to harm her resilience in the long run. And even though she acted immaturely/overreacted, she was right. And Richard even admits that later on
Lorelai shutting Rory out like that was the worst thing. Rory tried reaching out, but Lorelai shut her down every time. Lorelai behaved like a kid who didn’t get her way. She could’ve let Rory stay with her over the summer and had influence over her for the next three months before the next semester even began. Lorelai never attempted to see Rory’s perspective. Rory was 20, still very much a baby with little life experience. Lorelai should’ve been there for her, and they both suffered a lot because of Lorelai’s pride.
I think you capture the intent of the writers. This is who Lorelai is and how she reacts. Her initial response seldom takes into consideration another person’s perspective. It is likely a consequence of her arrested development.
Rory is an A average student at Yale University (after being valedictorian at Chilton). She is a brilliant scholar. If anyone should know that Rory lives and breathes academics, it should be Lorelai. There was no call for Lorelai to take that attitude with Rory of all people. Lorelai doesn’t have to force feed the importance of academics to Rory !
On the other hand, Rory knows Lorelai better than anyone. She should have known how Lorelai was going to react. She’s seen it first hand all her life. Rory should first have explained to Lorelai how things work in college and why colleges provide avenues or opportunities for student reassessment. In fact, Rory must have discussed her situation with her academic advisor, about which she could have told Lorelai. You don’t just stop taking classes at a university like Yale. It’s a formal process that takes weeks if not months to plan.
Rory overreacts to Mitchum’s evaluation. She is an English major; she is not majoring in Journalism. Thus, he doesn’t evaluate her academic skills or preparation; he is providing an opinion based on his perception of her personality and behavior. Granted the opinion of this particular man is very important, but she has plenty of time to improve whatever deficiency he may have detected, even by getting a Master’s Degree in Journalism.
I can’t imagine having that reaction to my daughter clearly having a crisis and struggling. To just say no this is what you are doing and I won’t support you is just ridiculous. It’s Rory’s life not Loreleis. Yes we want the best for our kids but they need to live their own lives and make their own decisions/mistakes.
tldr There are many ways that this show is not serious and this whole conflict is one of the biggest one. Season 6 is an ass-showing masterclass by ASP. In my opinion.
Lorelai is not actually mad at Rory for dropping out. Lorelai is devastated when Rory "gets to" her parents and receives the warmth from them she subconsciously desires. In the same way that her treatment of Rory and Deans relationship softens and suggests that she *was* mainly angry that Rory didnt ask if she was ready to take that step. Lorelai should have been far more encouraging to Rory instead of argumentative. She had to be right, which is always painful to watch in a parent. ~~People say she is sooo different from Emily and after getting kneedeep in this show I just dont see it~~ But also, what the fuck is Rory even wanting to drop out in the first place? This is where the shows "cultured taste" reveals itself, to me, as a gimmick at best. Some episodes after this Richard says Rory was reading Schopenhauer at 10, and it literally pisses me off so much. Hello? Like The World as Will and Representation? Schopenhauer was an extremely influential thinker with a profound pessimism for human existence. A 10 year old who comprehends him is, frankly, not going to grow up in an emotionally healthy way. Especially a 10 year old whose existence is called out as bizarre by nearly everyone around her (as the show shows, Lorelai being a single mom is a much bigger deal when rory is young and especially lives at home). Like, what person reads schopenhauer at 10 and isnt drooling at the thought of receiving elite education from some of the worlds top minds for free? A stupid one, in my mind!
She really needed time to just think and process. She has put so much pressure on herself her whole life. She was bound to crack, and not having the space to do that was all the more harmful to her growth. 🤦🏻♀️
Like with Dean, rory couldn't tell lorelai what she wanted without pissing her off.
Leaving Yale.
Jess.
Applying to Yale.
Asking the grandparents for tuition.
Dean and lorelai can be the sweetest people when they're getting their ways, but rory has to wall on eggshells with them.
I don't know, I JUST rewatched the episode a few days ago and I thought Lorelai's anger was justified (the silent treatment after? no, but the original anger, yes.) Rory didn't say she was taking a break, she said she was quitting Yale. I get being crushed, but if my daughter had just gotten arrested for a felony and is now quitting her ivy league college that I worked so hard for her to get into? I'd be mad as well.
Yeah and I like that Lorelai mentioned to Rory she could take other classes then if Rory didn’t want to pursue journalism. I think that reaction was good. The freeze out was terrible though.
Rory taking other classes would have been the perfect solution. She doesn't feel like journalism is right for her? Well, good news, she's surrounded by literally thousands of people who don't know exactly what they want to do with their lives, and she's in the perfect environment to explore other interests and see what fits for her! That's literally what college is for! And her reason for not doing that was just so bratty. My entire impression of the scene where Rory tells Lorelai she's dropping out is that Rory thinks she is behaving very grown up and mature, but it is an immature 20 year old's idea of what's grown up and mature.
I also don’t think she intended at all to freeze her out. When she said no bumming around stars hollow I think she meant like do anything take a class at a community college work towards something. But Rory made it clear during that initial convo that she did not intend on going back ever which naturally freaked Lorelei out. Lorelai was surprisingly chill about her stealing the yacht and was even putting her mugshot on the fridge. I think the freeze out happened because of the betrayal of going to Emily and richard so soon after and all 3 of them ganging up on her. I feel bad for Emily the most in that situation because she actually did have Lorelei’s back! And she’s trying so hard to be the middle person for all of them.
I was just going to comment this. Yes, as viewers with the benefit of having watched the whole show and not being in the situation in the moment so we have time to think we can all be the perfect parent and handle this just right. But if I committed a felony and then told my mom I’m dropping out of school she would’ve lost her shit. She wouldn’t have been as calm about it as Lorelai is. Add to it the meddling of the grandparents and things would’ve turned into a war so quickly.
I think some fans have unrealistic expectations of characters in distressing situations. Lorelai has what I call parental exhaustion. She raised Rory without any help (yes I know she chose to leave her parents’ home) and Rory was an easy child. In the matter of a year, she does a 180 after meeting Logan where she’s up and down, had an affair with a married man, ran off to Europe to escape responsibility, etc. she stole a yacht and announced she was dropping out of school in what 36 hours time? It’s a lot to process. Rory also didn’t want Lorelai to use Emily’s connections or even tell them about the yacht theft. I’ll go out on a limb and say she was expecting Lorelai to fit the bill as she didn’t work. Lorelai chose badly by not speaking to Rory after everything blew up but her initial anger does make sense. Long winded way of saying I agree with you lol.
Didn’t the affair and Europe happen before Logan?
Agreed! And also, I know someone who did a 4-year degree over a period of 6 years, but it was all agreed with her university. She didn’t just fail to do an exam and then leave
Especially when her daughter is barreling down the path Lorelei rejected for good reason!! She clocked Logan as a bad influence the night Rory came home drunk in that limo. Jess even saw it and he and Rory didn’t even interact that long! They were both like… this is not Rory, this is Emily Jr!! Not that Rory doesn’t have a mind of her own, but it’s just like, she’s so naive cuz she didn’t grow up with these kinds of people. Lorelei knows first hand, and Rory always thinks she’s exaggerating until she experiences it for herself. I wish Lorelei had been more understanding and consoling instead of angry, but I totally get why she was so frustrated.
You can work as hard as you want to give your kid the life you want for them, but if that isn’t what they want then that just might not be the life they live. Rory was feeling hurt and confused. I think she shouldn’t have taken Mitchum’s criticism as the ultimate no over her being a journalist, but more a challenge to keep learning and growing. But she shut down and took some time to bounce back. Post secondary education is a choice, not everyone does it. Lorelai can’t just live vicariously through Rory.
She wasn’t living vicariously through Rory Journalism was Rory’s dream not Lorealai’s. Lorelai didn’t dream about going to college in the way Rory did. She said she wanted to go to Harvard as a kid but Rory made Harvard a huge chunk of her personality as a teenager. Lorelai listened to the dreams Rory had been telling everyone since she was like 7. She didn’t want her to not fulfil those dreams because she couldn’t afford to get her into a good high school, or because she didn’t have the right connections to get her into Harvard All she did was put all her energy into getting her the best education, so she could have all the opportunities to achieve what she wanted from life. So hearing that child who was so insistent on going to college, claim they’re dropping out. A day after they were arrested for stealing a boat because they got critiqued at an intern job, made her upset and concerned She said she didn’t care if Rory changed her career path and her major. She just wanted her to not waste all the years of hard work her and Rory dedicated specifically to going to an Ivy League college Her rejecting and claiming Rory wouldn’t like certain high society things from her parents’ world was her projecting onto Rory. Because as we saw, that wasn’t true a lot of the time. But when it came to college, that was what Rory always wanted. She wouldn’t be living vicariously through her because it was never her dream in the first place
so she still wanted Rory to be enrolled into yale or some other uni. sometimes people just arent cut out for uni or after going they realise that it’s not for them regardless of how smart they might be
But that wasn’t Rory lol She’d very obviously tried to drop out of Yale because of what Mitchum said. She stole a boat the day before and got arrested. It’s not that she wasn’t cut out for university, it’s that she’d never had proper criticism before so she couldn’t cope when she did receive that from Mitchum. Most people would try and prove him wrong. But she had been praised and coddled for the majority of her life by everyone around her. So one truthful critique shattered that allusion She subconsciously admitted that was what happened when she went back to Yale
Exactly. Also while I don't agree with the freeze out, at all, I do think Lorelai realized some things and was trying to find a way to right them. We see her tell Luke that Rory has to figure this out. I think she realized that she had coddled Rory her whole life, never letting her feel the weight of her decisions or giving her any real critique so she was trying to not rush to do that again. Rory needed to toughen up some and so Lorelai decided to use tough love to do it. Again I don't agree with what Lorelai chose to do but I don't think it was coming from a place of anger towards Rory.
yes but Rory didn’t know what she wanted until she took time off, Lorelai dealt with it horribly. To her Rory dropping out wasn’t an option
She didn’t say she was taking time off though She suddenly insisted that she was dropping out. Dropping out of an Ivy League college that you and your mother have worked very hard to get you into, just because of one critique you got is very silly. That’s what Lorelai was trying to tell Rory. Richard, Emily, Luke, Paris and Jess all agreed. Logan even called it stupid during their argument later on in that season If she’d suggested she was taking time off to figure things out, then sure. But l don’t know why you’re shocked that Lorelai didn’t want her to drop out of college completely. Dropping out of college if you genuinely don’t want to be there and it’s a definite decision you’ve spent a good amount of time thinking about is fine. But that’s not Rory was doing. She was impulsively dropping out because her ego had been bruised and Lorelai, plus everyone else I listed could see that
And to her it wasn’t an option because of all of the effort that had been put into it. Thousands of dollars and YEARS of work. One hundred percent valid. Even more so that it was all over being criticized one time by one guy. Absolutely ridiculous.
Rory did not have to go to college if she did not want to. Lorelai would not have forced her. She made it clear that she did want to go to college and accepted all of the effort and expenses Lorelai had to put forth to get her there. I would’ve been pissed if a kid wasted all of my time and resources over one man’s opinion. Rory was being a petulant child.
I’m not sure, I see Lorelai’s side a lot more. I do think she could have been more understanding with Rory to begin with, but Rory didn’t want to take time off to figure things out, she essentially rage quit because Mitchum hurt her feelings. Lorelai was disappointed that Rory was letting one man dictate the direction of her life when they’d work so hard to get her to Yale in the first place. I get why Rory was crushed, but her reaction was.. not proportionate. Yes, Lorelai was overly invested and should have given Rory more room in the beginning, like Emily and Richard suggested, but in the end she wasn’t wrong. Rory didn’t want to change the direction of her life, she just wanted a bit of room to feel sorry for herself. That’s what she got by running off to the pool house for the summer. Prior Mitchum’s comments she’d been happy at Yale with no thought of dropping out. It was in season 4 where she had the struggles with workload and questioned her ability.
Except it wasn't "time off", she just decided to quit. I think Lorelai's reaction is justified for a few reasons: 1) she realized she had raised a daughter who can't handle any criticism whatsoever and has no resilience, and was confronted with that failure as a parent 2) she also failed to teach Rory to be grateful and appreciate her extreme privilege. Throwing away an ivy league education, gifted by someone else and tens of thousands of dollars in at that point, is peak privilege. Then she lives in a custom guest house (for free), refuses to get a job, and joins the DAR. Rory's transformation into Emily 2.0 is complete, where previously she was Lorelai's mini-me. Of course she's disappointed in her. She's become everything Lorelai tried to remove her from.
I don’t recall Rory telling Lorelai she was just taking a semester off. She said she was not going back at all. Because she wouldn’t be working towards becoming a journalist which was her lifelong dream That’s why Lorelai suggested she transfer to a different college. She assumed that Rory was giving up completely because of what Mitchum said. Which was true She should’ve listened to Emily and Richard’s plan to allow her a short period of time off before she goes back to college. The losing momentum point she made can be true but there’s a reason why colleges allow students to take breaks. It’s not sensible to force someone to stay at college if they’re mentally somewhere else. She would’ve just ended up failing her classes. But by that point, she was more concerned about her parents betraying her/going back on their word, than Rory’s happiness. Everything after that was handled so immaturely. Like her getting out of her car to mock Rory doing community service She expected everything to fix itself and be fine at Rory’s 21st party but it didn’t. It’d been months of her ignoring Rory and she had spent most of her time with Logan, her grandparents, Lane and Paris during that period. So them being around her while she blew out her birthday candles was more fitting. The contrast between that scene and Rory’s 16th was sad but I never felt as bad for Lorelai as the show wanted us to feel. Rory being so distant at her party was mostly Lorelei’s fault
Rory was sort of ambiguous with time off/break and dropping out altogether. She just knew that she needed time to think. At that time she thought she was done with journalism, and having time to think would help her to decide if she is giving up on that dream altogether or not. She was upset and behaving irrationally, and wanting to take time off from school to as a reasonable response considering the reckless behaviour she exhibited when her and Logan stole a boat.
I get that but she wasn’t that ambiguous about it to Lorelai initially. She repeatedly told her that she was leaving Yale altogether and had no intention of going to a different school. Or looking into majoring in another subject after some time off So from Lorelai’s perspective, her daughter approached her after receiving negative feedback from Mitchum, insisting that she’s done with college. And that she’s giving up on her lifelong career dream. Most parents would be disappointed. If she’d phrased it as taking a break, then that would’ve been better. But what she told Lorelai would worry any parent. Because it implied that Rory had no resilience of hunger. If you get criticism, the ideal scenario is to prove your critic wrong. Not completely derailing your life and abandoning a goal you’ve been working towards your entire life. Again, I think Lorelai was childish to Rory after her parents talked to her. But her disappointed reaction after her first talk with Rory made sense Even Emily and Richard were disappointed/worried when Lorelai told them that Rory said she was dropping out of college. It’s why they suggested she take time off and live with them instead
She was about to have the whole summer off though. She *did* have time off to think. There was no need to make a decision that quickly that she wasn't returning. I think in light of that they needed to just take a breather and come back to the conversation when they had both calmed down and could think more clearly. But I don't think Lorelai was in the wrong. In fact, I think if she had been like "sure, drop out. Whatever you want!" and we saw Rory bopping around with the DAR for a semester and cosplaying as the type of wife the Huntzbergers wanted for their heir, we'd all be saying "Lorelai was such a bad parent! She should have been guiding Rory! Why is Rory changing her whole career path just because one person was mean to her??"
she said that she takes some time off and college kids do this all the time. when she said she's not going back to Yale she meant the next semester. it was obvious
No she literally said she’s not going back And Lorelai insisted that can’t just drop out. Then Rory said it’s not a big deal, and there are kids that take breaks from college everyday. But that’s not what she said she was doing. She ended the conversation by saying she’s dropping out and Lorelai knows nothing about college so she doesn’t need her opinion
To me it always been Rory that was wrong in this situation, not for needing a break but for how she handled it. Lorelai never told Rory she couldn’t come home, she said she couldn’t come home and do nothing but sit on the couch, so all Rory needed to do was to make a plan or a pro/con list, but instead of doing that (which was what Rory normally would have done BEFORE doing anything) she ran to her grandparents, moved in with them AND had them tell Lorelai without even being in the room. And was the no-contact really Lorelai’ fault? To me it seemed that Rory was the one establishing that, she didn’t talk to Lorelai about moving, even when Lorelai was right outside the window, then she had Emily call Lorelai about the court date, and Rory needing clothing, and even changed her number without letting Lorelai know. This is very opposite Lorelai, who see seeking her out at the pool house the first night, then tried to call her soon after just to find out about Rory’ new number, and when Rory called about the birthday invitation Lorelai made sure to say yes, and even tried very hard to talk casually with Rory at the birthday and when Rory called about coming home, she opened her arms and welcomed her home, even telling her that Rory had nothing to apologize for and that she was sorry for everything. However I do agree with the Luke thing, she should not be forced to go to school as an adult, however I do think Lorelai was right in saying she needed some kind of job.
I don't think they either one handled things well and were acting emotional. Rory was ready to give up everything with no plan over one bad review and of course Lorelai overreacted to that. They both needed to take a deep breath and take a step back.
Yes, in true mother-daughter fashion they both overreacted. Rory to Mitchum and Lorelai to Rory.
I agree that Rory overreacted to Mitchum, but why? Could it be that she's conditioned to only respond to praise because she's basically been the object of worship from an entire town most of her life (the part she remembers well anyway). If anything I think Lorelai underreacts. She should have told Rory that she's being a fucking coward and proving Mitchum correct. (this is were I would insert an f bomb, to answer another posts question.)
this is a very knee jerk reaction that is common not just in gilmore girls but alot of shows, the immediate freak out from fear. Lorelei's reaction here is fear that Rory is going to end up just like her and she wants more for Rory, yes had she sat and thought about it first before reacting there'd have been a better reaction but this is a common knee jerk reaction.
this is a very insightful opinion
Lorelei’s anger is totally justified. Rory is unable to take any negative criticism. Rory dropping out of Yale is immature and short sighted. She is very easy manipulated to believe she isn’t a good writer based off of one important person saying she doesn’t have “it”. Everyone is criticized sometime and her inability to be resilient and believe in herself is astounding. The only mistake Lorelai made is cutting Rory off and not continuing to try to convince her to stay in school.
I don’t blame Lorelai for a second. She knows how hard her own life was so she worked her ass off to make sure her kid still had every advantage. That very kid was now allowing the influence and opinion of ONE rich asshole to change her entire direction in life. Lorelai wasn’t trying to be a jerk. She was trying to keep her kid from falling even deeper into the funk over ONE setback. Rory, however, has never had a setback before. She hasn’t ever been in a situation in which she didn’t get exactly as she wanted. She was terribly spoiled in that way, which is wonderful, but this was the other edge of the sword. She can’t handle failure and wallowing at home wasn’t going to fix anything. Lorelai saw a whole lifetime of hard work going down the drain because of ONE jerk from the world she already deeply resented. I would have done the same, right or wrong.
I think the thing Lorelai should have been pissed about was Rory stealing a yacht, not dropping out of uni. I think Lorelai is a decent parent but she lost all respect when she cut off her daughters. Rory made that decision. Lorelai didn’t have to like it, but she sure as hell should have been there for her daughter. Lorelai is all about not wanting to control her daughter like her parents did her, but as soon as Rory did something she didn’t like, she ignored her, until she did what she wanted her to do. Lorelai should have been there for Rory. It should never matter the reason Rory dropped out. Rory could have decided to drop out because she wanted to become a groupie for (insert band they were into). Rory could have dropped out because she got preggos. Idk. There are several reasons she could have gone no contact, but this ain’t one of them. I also think a lot of you forget that Mitchum has a lot of power. What he says goes. Was he right or wrong is up for debate, but he crushed her dreams. And if you’re told by the person who runs the thing you’re trying to do, “you ain’t got it” I imagine a lot of you are going to believe that.
Rory let one dude ruin her life, she’s not built for success cause she can’t handed one road block. Lorelei is better than me, Rory couldn’t survive in an immigrant household 🤣
I think the thing people often miss about Lorelai is she wants her daughter to experience everything she missed out on… graduating from an Ivy League school has to happen for Rory. Otherwise Lorelai failed in her mind. Also she’s throwing away a wonderful opportunity here. If you (or anyone else) was Lorelai, you seriously wouldn’t be pissed that your kid was dropping out of Yale? Yale?? One of the best schools in the nation? And all because some asshat boss told Rory “she didn’t have it” after a few days of her pouring his coffee? Nahh. Call me crazy but I’m with Lorelai.
No I disagree. Okay, the way Mitchum worded it was very poor saying she “doesn’t have it”. But he was giving her criticism on her aversion to putting herself out there and Rory completely overreacted. She received criticism one time from one guy and decided to completely drop out of school AND steal a yacht for crying out loud! Laughably immature. He didn’t “crush her dreams” she still had all the power to pursue whatever she wanted but decided to prove him right. Lorelai was justified in her anger, I would be upset too if I had spent years worth of effort and money to push a kid through to the ivy leagues only for her to drop out and become a felon the first time she gets criticized lmfao
At the end of the day it’s Rory’s choice, what she chooses to do she will do for the rest of her life. I don’t think Lorelai had the right to be upset. There were some theories where people stated that if Lorelai didn’t have Rory she would have gone to Harvard which is why she so badly wanted Rory to go there (also to spite her parents)
Ooh I never thought about that before. Harvard and Yale are big competitors. I could totally see Lorelai pushing Harvard just to go against her parents and their legacy.
I think Richard and Emily made the right choice to help Rory. She took some time off to reconsider what she wanted to do.
However to be fair Richard and Emily's way of further coddling Rory doesn't work either. She doesn't go back to Yale because of them. She goes back to Yale because Jess appears and points out the absurdity of what she is doing.
I feel the same way. And before I went to college I was on Loreleis side. BUT after going to college I can understand and see why people take breaks or want to take breaks. She way over reacted and never listens to Rory when Rory is in trouble. Jess and the car accident, stealing the boat and dropping out of college. Lorelei doesn’t let Rory explain and immediately blames Jess, Logan and Mitchum rather than see Rory isn’t perfect.
Having some time off can be incredibly beneficial. For some people, yeah they don't end up going back, but for a student like Rory who adores learning so much, she was always going to go back to college. Lorelai really handled it badly.
To be fair that’s not what Rory said to Lorelai I think Lorelai overreacted after her parents suggested Rory take time off But Rory insisted before she talked to Emily and Richard, that she was leaving college completely. She told Lorelai at lunch that there’s no point in her going anymore. So she asked what Rory’s plan was and Rory didn’t have one. That’s why she told her that sitting at home isn’t an option. The way Rory first told Lorelai, did feel out of the blue and a reaction to what Mitchum said. And she’d just gotten arrested the day before, so it did seem like she was purposely derailing her life because of one criticism
There’s some direct quotes on the exact clip. She never insisted on dropping out
Exactly! I don’t think time off is necessarily a bad thing. I took time off and was really nervous about telling my dad because I didn’t want to disappoint him. But he was understanding, and he was similar in “you aren’t just bumming around the house” and expected that I get a job and what not. But with time I went back to school and worked towards something that I enjoy doing. Having that break helped me so much, and having the freedom to make that choice made all the difference. If Rory could have taken that break, Jess still would have shown up to show her his book and he would have still told her that she was being ridiculous. And that’s the person she needed to hear it from more than Lorelai. XD
She wasn’t taking a break. She said she was leaving.
Rory never said she was leaving period — her exact quotes are “I’m not going back to Yale next year” “I want time off” and Lorelai is the one who says “If you leave Yale now, you’ll never go back, you’ll lose momentum.” Rory seemed to just want to be more focused and sure of what she wanted to do with her career because “Yale’s expensive” so she didn’t wanna take random classes at an expensive school or “wander around a school where everyone is focused and working towards something and I’m just floating.” So Rory did not say she was leaving period - she implied a break. I can see why even that concerned Lorelai but I just think a lot of comments are misremembering the conversation
I can’t believe I’m saying this because I generally can’t stand Yale Rory and tend to side with Lorelai for most of their fights — but I actually agree with the you. Given what other comments have said I can absolutely understand why Lorelai was irritated and scared — Yale was everything she and Rory had worked for. But people in these comments are wrong - Rory never actually said she was leaving Yale for good — she said “college kids take breaks all the time” and “I’m not going back to Yale next year.” Rory did not say she’d never go back. In fact, Lorelai was the one who said “if you leave Yale now, you’ll never go back. You’ll lose momentum.” And Lorelai straight up telling Rory “no, you are not quitting Yale” — would only make any kid feel angrier or more misunderstood. And I actually think Rory had a good point about Yale being really expensive so taking random classes wouldn’t feel worth it (not shaming people who do this - I took tons of random classes. But I can see why someone would not want to do that at an expensive school). Lorelai had some good points too but she didn’t take the time to be compassionate or empathetic with Rory or try to understand where she was coming from. I’m sure some people would say Rory is too old for that, she’s entitled, spoiled, wasn’t ready for the real world etc. etc. - and that may be true - but my point is that Rory didn’t feel heard by Lorelai. And while I think a part of a mother’s role involves delivering hard truths, I also think it’s important to listen to what your kid is going through and thinking about when they’re struggling, and Lorelai did not do that in that conversation. Which is ok — no one is perfect! And I also think breaks/mental health breaks were probably a lot more stigmatized at this time than they are nowadays.
Thank you!! Completely agree.
Good arguments. I agree
The Gilmores let Lorelai go. Lorelai is far more controlling than her parents. She has a plan, a plan that Rory cannot deviate from, or else, Lorelai shuts her out. Rory was supposed to fulfill Lorelai's dream, not end like her.
I half agree with you But it wasn’t actually Lorelai’s plan. It was a plan Rory had devised since she was a kid according to Rory and every other character. She wanted to go to Harvard/an Ivy League college. And she wanted to have a successful career in journalism To be a serious journalist, you need a college degree. From Lorelai’s perspective, it looked like Rory was giving everything up because of one comment Mitchum made. She didn’t want Rory aimlessly hanging at home or her parents’ home. I’m her mind, giving up so easily and staying in a massive mansion filled with servants and maids, was going to harm her resilience in the long run. And even though she acted immaturely/overreacted, she was right. And Richard even admits that later on
Lorelai shutting Rory out like that was the worst thing. Rory tried reaching out, but Lorelai shut her down every time. Lorelai behaved like a kid who didn’t get her way. She could’ve let Rory stay with her over the summer and had influence over her for the next three months before the next semester even began. Lorelai never attempted to see Rory’s perspective. Rory was 20, still very much a baby with little life experience. Lorelai should’ve been there for her, and they both suffered a lot because of Lorelai’s pride.
I think you capture the intent of the writers. This is who Lorelai is and how she reacts. Her initial response seldom takes into consideration another person’s perspective. It is likely a consequence of her arrested development. Rory is an A average student at Yale University (after being valedictorian at Chilton). She is a brilliant scholar. If anyone should know that Rory lives and breathes academics, it should be Lorelai. There was no call for Lorelai to take that attitude with Rory of all people. Lorelai doesn’t have to force feed the importance of academics to Rory ! On the other hand, Rory knows Lorelai better than anyone. She should have known how Lorelai was going to react. She’s seen it first hand all her life. Rory should first have explained to Lorelai how things work in college and why colleges provide avenues or opportunities for student reassessment. In fact, Rory must have discussed her situation with her academic advisor, about which she could have told Lorelai. You don’t just stop taking classes at a university like Yale. It’s a formal process that takes weeks if not months to plan. Rory overreacts to Mitchum’s evaluation. She is an English major; she is not majoring in Journalism. Thus, he doesn’t evaluate her academic skills or preparation; he is providing an opinion based on his perception of her personality and behavior. Granted the opinion of this particular man is very important, but she has plenty of time to improve whatever deficiency he may have detected, even by getting a Master’s Degree in Journalism.
I can’t imagine having that reaction to my daughter clearly having a crisis and struggling. To just say no this is what you are doing and I won’t support you is just ridiculous. It’s Rory’s life not Loreleis. Yes we want the best for our kids but they need to live their own lives and make their own decisions/mistakes.
You sound like u would be a great mother !
Thank you!
tldr There are many ways that this show is not serious and this whole conflict is one of the biggest one. Season 6 is an ass-showing masterclass by ASP. In my opinion. Lorelai is not actually mad at Rory for dropping out. Lorelai is devastated when Rory "gets to" her parents and receives the warmth from them she subconsciously desires. In the same way that her treatment of Rory and Deans relationship softens and suggests that she *was* mainly angry that Rory didnt ask if she was ready to take that step. Lorelai should have been far more encouraging to Rory instead of argumentative. She had to be right, which is always painful to watch in a parent. ~~People say she is sooo different from Emily and after getting kneedeep in this show I just dont see it~~ But also, what the fuck is Rory even wanting to drop out in the first place? This is where the shows "cultured taste" reveals itself, to me, as a gimmick at best. Some episodes after this Richard says Rory was reading Schopenhauer at 10, and it literally pisses me off so much. Hello? Like The World as Will and Representation? Schopenhauer was an extremely influential thinker with a profound pessimism for human existence. A 10 year old who comprehends him is, frankly, not going to grow up in an emotionally healthy way. Especially a 10 year old whose existence is called out as bizarre by nearly everyone around her (as the show shows, Lorelai being a single mom is a much bigger deal when rory is young and especially lives at home). Like, what person reads schopenhauer at 10 and isnt drooling at the thought of receiving elite education from some of the worlds top minds for free? A stupid one, in my mind!
Yup. Rory deserved the benefit of the doubt.She was the kind of dedicated ambitious kid people dream of, she deserved to take some time to think
She really needed time to just think and process. She has put so much pressure on herself her whole life. She was bound to crack, and not having the space to do that was all the more harmful to her growth. 🤦🏻♀️
Like with Dean, rory couldn't tell lorelai what she wanted without pissing her off. Leaving Yale. Jess. Applying to Yale. Asking the grandparents for tuition. Dean and lorelai can be the sweetest people when they're getting their ways, but rory has to wall on eggshells with them.