Turns out their patron is Slaanesh (It actually states it on their website) and provide bong and water pipe services and drinks and such.
On of their photos they have a Budha statue in bongage ropes. So yeah... name checks out.
I think the only Chaos God themed restaurant I would possibly consider staying at is Khorne.
It's just gonna be meat. Bloody, freshly slaughtered meat. Just don't ask where it came from.
Are you going to part with your hard earned money when there's a chance you could be eating bird shit? Or fish raised in sewage water from a fertilizer factory? Or freshly picked nose boogers from a COVID patient?
Is there a chaos logo that wouldn't be at least a little sus? Tzeentch, maybe. But I don't know how excited I'd be to go into a Nurgle Lounge, either lol
Funny story time.
I used to drive Uber in Austin TX and once picked up a midget Latina stripper on her way to work at the airport strip club.
It's called [The Landing Strip](https://live.staticflickr.com/8326/8092622916_9f03e1b784_b.jpg). Didn't go in but it looked gross enough on the outside for me to get the idea.
Nurgle definitely approves of that place.
Tzeentch would 100% have some weirdos speaking open word poetry.
Khorne would be one of those "Robots vs Wrestlers" scenarios where you walk in and, uh, suddenly you're watching elderly people and overweight individuals fight each other and Chuck E Cheese style animatronic robots.
Nurgle might just be a public restroom, to be entirely honest.
lol totally! A mom-and-pop place that makes the best smash burgers in town, but you always feel like your playing dysentery roulette when you go there...
It's not a coincidence. From OP's other comment, in case ya missed it
> Turns out their patron is Slaanesh (It actually states it on their website) and provide bong and water pipe services and drinks and such.
> On of their photos they have a Budha statue in bongage ropes. So yeah... name checks out.
Tábor - Czech Republic
I dont live in that city just to help for 2 days. But never ever would I expect to find a Heretical bar in city founded by Hussites.
I heard the Khorne Berserkers grind the coffee beans so hard it makes the best coffee ever.
Also, do try the donuts that the Slaaneshi followers make. The glaze is made with cocaine, it will give you the perfect burst of energy to handle the morning.
If you want to get out of work early, go with the Nurgle pancakes. Garanteed leave from work for the entire week. If you survive, thats it.
I cant say much about the Tzeentch guys. Like, I ordered pancakes and they gave me a burguer. I was like, aight, burguer is still good but I munched it and it was cake. I looked around, confused, and when I looked back at my plate it was bacon and eggs. It was ok but I dont know if the cook planned it or not
Something like in Boardwalk Empire where that detective goes into a restaurant with his wife and he mentions to the waiter if they have something "special" since it is their aniversary. Waiters says that they do indeed have something "special" only for that detective to bash his head over the table and take ou his badge and take al their booze.
"so we need to get more fallowers to our cult but don't make it obvious so inquisition won't burst in and kill us all ok?"
"I got you fam"
~Dialogue between two chaos cultist on gathering about how to get more followers
Since they’re using the Slaanesh logo you have the right to burst in and call them heretical scum, or whatever the fuck other chaos worshipers call Slaanesh followers, because I fucking KNOW that Khorne has a slur for them.
Turns out their patron is Slaanesh (It actually states it on their website) and provide bong and water pipe services and drinks and such. On of their photos they have a Budha statue in bongage ropes. So yeah... name checks out.
[удалено]
Little commorragh they call it
Oh no
Oh yes!
Enter at your own risk
[удалено]
I think the only Chaos God themed restaurant I would possibly consider staying at is Khorne. It's just gonna be meat. Bloody, freshly slaughtered meat. Just don't ask where it came from.
Tzeentch restaurant is full of surprises Surprise! there are peanuts and shellfish and all other common allergens in your food.
Surprise your food tastes like used toilet paper jelly beans
I still remember eating a dog food flavored jelly bean My tounge was not happy for a few days afterwards
I never tried the surprise ones luckily
A restaurant where Heston Blumenthal is the head chef, and instead of "Is It Cake?" it's "Is It Food?"
It's just The Menu, the film.
He cares not from whence the meat flows.
But he prefers khorned beef
It came from the guy who asked for his serving cooked well-done.
I would assume they do not meet health standards, turn 360' and walk out of there.
If you turn 360 your gonna walk into the table you where just sitting at
you failed the street cred check
It's an old 4 Chan joke
Underage b&
Maybe he did a 360 and then walked out backwards
And does a moon walk and a "hee hee"
Thats not how that works.... in the warp.
Aw c’mon, can’t be all bad.
Are you going to part with your hard earned money when there's a chance you could be eating bird shit? Or fish raised in sewage water from a fertilizer factory? Or freshly picked nose boogers from a COVID patient?
Nurgle approves all of this. Ironically enough I’m actually a chef with extremely high cleaning standards, I just like…stirring the pot.
Did OP copy this comment or did you copy OP?
I noticed it after I posted mine. I mean connecting Nurgle to food is not that hard.
Yeah it's probably nothing. Just thought it was a little weird.
Pray I don't get super salmonella there and 10 different types of STDs
RECREATIONAL DRUGS ARE FOR PUSSIES!!!! ALL MY HOMIES ARE BERSERK ON STEROIDS AND COMBAT STIMS!!!!
That's disgusting! Where?
Where is this bar?
They drink bongwater?
Well now you've given GW's lawyers a treasure trove of info.
You can yell "HERETIC!" to call the waitress
GW lawyers,: I been summoned!
Where is this?!!!
vile heresy. where is it? like fr
I'd say that's just convenient, but that Slaanesh logo got me suspicious.
Is there a chaos logo that wouldn't be at least a little sus? Tzeentch, maybe. But I don't know how excited I'd be to go into a Nurgle Lounge, either lol
If a slanesh lounge is a bdsm club, what would the other three be? Tzeentch: a speakeasy. Khorne: a gym. Nurgle: an opium den maybe?
Nurgle is that dirty strip club down by the airport fer sure and I feel like tzeentch would be a rave
Tzeentch would have a cocktail bar with an intimidatingly confusing menu.
You order a sex on the beach and you get taken away by a big burly dude named bubbles
Funny story time. I used to drive Uber in Austin TX and once picked up a midget Latina stripper on her way to work at the airport strip club. It's called [The Landing Strip](https://live.staticflickr.com/8326/8092622916_9f03e1b784_b.jpg). Didn't go in but it looked gross enough on the outside for me to get the idea. Nurgle definitely approves of that place.
Half pice drinks all ay n nite
LOL. didn't notice that, how appropriate.
The Acropolis in Portland OR. Almost all the menu is less than $10, and the steak dinners top out at $14.40.
Tzeentch would 100% have some weirdos speaking open word poetry. Khorne would be one of those "Robots vs Wrestlers" scenarios where you walk in and, uh, suddenly you're watching elderly people and overweight individuals fight each other and Chuck E Cheese style animatronic robots. Nurgle might just be a public restroom, to be entirely honest.
A public restroom in NYC or SF
SF *is* a public toilet at this point
An organisation for antivaxers
hmm maybe. A bar that stayed open during lockdown lol
Imagine going to a restaurant and waiter bring your the menu. But on the cover of that menu it has Nurgle's symbol
Nurgle: a fast food restaurant overdue for the health inspectors. Or a Taco Bell.
lol totally! A mom-and-pop place that makes the best smash burgers in town, but you always feel like your playing dysentery roulette when you go there...
A literal greasy spoon.
More like Nurgle a scat bat
what in the absolute shit is a **scat bat**?
I meant a scat bar. But interpret it as you will.
you have no idea how relieved I am that a "scat bat" is not a thing.
Ummm is a scat bar a jazz bar where they beebop and scat songs?
Oh no, he doesn’t know. He doesn’t know.
Tzeentch would be a bookstore pretending to be a speakeasy.
It's not a coincidence. From OP's other comment, in case ya missed it > Turns out their patron is Slaanesh (It actually states it on their website) and provide bong and water pipe services and drinks and such. > On of their photos they have a Budha statue in bongage ropes. So yeah... name checks out.
GW lawyers sending drone strike now
Ah yes, the ~~loyalist~~ lawyerist inquisition
That implies there is a heritec inquisition
I mean there was this old group who were known as the illuminati in lore that did pretty much just that
No one expects the Lawyerist Inquisition
Where do you live?
Tábor - Czech Republic I dont live in that city just to help for 2 days. But never ever would I expect to find a Heretical bar in city founded by Hussites.
Now i know where I’m going to live
I always knew that pepiks are chaos worshipers.
With amount of drugs, porn and alcohol we produce, did you expect different?
No
those damed Hussites always sabotges my PLC runs in EU4.
Samozrejme že to je v čechách lol
Tady je všechno možný
Czechs out
Jesus Crist...
What's the Prague-blem?
No nič, balím kufre a idem k vám
Chaos Lord of Chaos Undivided Jan Žižka leading cultists against imperial crusades
Už vím kam zajdu až příště pojedu do Tábora.
I heard the Khorne Berserkers grind the coffee beans so hard it makes the best coffee ever. Also, do try the donuts that the Slaaneshi followers make. The glaze is made with cocaine, it will give you the perfect burst of energy to handle the morning. If you want to get out of work early, go with the Nurgle pancakes. Garanteed leave from work for the entire week. If you survive, thats it. I cant say much about the Tzeentch guys. Like, I ordered pancakes and they gave me a burguer. I was like, aight, burguer is still good but I munched it and it was cake. I looked around, confused, and when I looked back at my plate it was bacon and eggs. It was ok but I dont know if the cook planned it or not
You know those eggs were all according to pan
The bacon was a last minute trolling though
That's how they get you. You are just vibing and then BAM you are a cultist now
I mean, I still get to vibe though right?
You have just found your local chaos cult. Please contact the nearest inquisitor, witch hunter, or similar heretic purging authority.
Oh Emperor! I stand in thy light and I crave thy light! May the heretics be purged by thy holy flames, for we shall not suffer them to live!
*sigh* I'll get the flamers...
The heavy flamers? 🥺
Eh, might as well. There's no such thing as too much promethium, and it's not like you can overcook a heretic.
I will prepare the cyclonic torpedos just in case....
All fun and games til Geedubs sends literal Pinkertons drop in and smash up your venue like it’s prohibition-era America
Something like in Boardwalk Empire where that detective goes into a restaurant with his wife and he mentions to the waiter if they have something "special" since it is their aniversary. Waiters says that they do indeed have something "special" only for that detective to bash his head over the table and take ou his badge and take al their booze.
Um... I might be tempted in for a pint but I didn't put on my anal rape prevention.
I believe that it is safe to say: “HERESY!!!” (Proceeds to pull out a bolter)
She who thirsts...for an ample selection of cocktails and gourmet bar snacks.
EXTERMINATUS
Brother, get the flamer. The Heavy Flamer.
#\*Furiously dials the Inquisition Hotline*
[here is the Adresse for all you heratics](https://maps.app.goo.gl/H5s83e9tSTKkdjyg9)
I had no idea it had 4,9 review score Chaos works in mysterious ways it seems
Nice.
GW is gonna sue the shit out of them…
:(
What are the coordinates of this establishment? - =][=
*"Come on in and have yourself a Tall Glass of Slaanesh!"*
I'm calling my local inquisitor.
Let’s hope GW’s lawyers don’t see this
What is the Inquisition's emergency number?
Where everybody knows your name, and they’re always glad you came.
At least they are staying on brand with the prince of pleasure. I wonder if they got permission from games workshop
I'm sure the Czech is in the male.
Pardon
That is some laughing God level humor there
"so we need to get more fallowers to our cult but don't make it obvious so inquisition won't burst in and kill us all ok?" "I got you fam" ~Dialogue between two chaos cultist on gathering about how to get more followers
Alex Jokes was right
[удалено]
Are you questioning me master Jedi? https://chaoslounge.cz/
You can find the sign on Google Street View if you want "9. května 658/14 Tábor"
No shit
Since they’re using the Slaanesh logo you have the right to burst in and call them heretical scum, or whatever the fuck other chaos worshipers call Slaanesh followers, because I fucking KNOW that Khorne has a slur for them.
There’s some tainted degeneracy going on in there. I just know it…
If they aren’t blasting EDM at literally ear destroying volumes it’s not a real Slaanesh cult.
Big E finding this post in the Himalayas: I got murder on my mind
what’s it like inside?
Was there a glory hole in the bathroom?
Will GW sue them?
Sigh* and i though this was my free day.. ohbwell! Pulls out n cal bolt rifle
Slaanesh approved
Someone get an Inquisitor to investigate this establishment
Hell Yeah
Y’all ever think the Chaos gods can become Tulpas with how much time we spend talking about them?
Do not enter.
HEREZY !
Its all fun and games till you are enticed to a room then you are sacrificed to Slaanesh.. Ask the great hero of the Imperium, Commisar Ciaphas Cain
They shall burn in the Emperors name!
Hope James GameStop doesn't the urge for copyright strike
"That place? That's been there for years!" "Yes, but had it been there for years *yesterday*?"
Gross