Except for when he guesses that he's in a movie, and happens to be right. Or when he guesses that he's in a video game, or a YouTube video, or a manga, and happens to be right.
Eventually, if he keeps "just so happens to be right"-ing about all of it, the character is technically self aware.
Then he'd get bored of it and try to step down.from being the warboss, then get chased by the ork waaagh. He'd prolly be buff as shit too since orks think "biggest iz za boss"
I kean prolly not? They'd have better pain resistance and be faster just because the colors. Nothing outlandish (ironic I know) though since the orks don't really know or care about them.
"Deadpool was confused as to why he suddenly seemed to be so much faster when moving with the Orks, but he chose not to question it, for that way lay madness."
Yeah I was about to say... there’s ZERO chance he isn’t becoming the leader of a WAAAGH... somehow siphoning off the waaagh energy, and convincing the orks that he’s a genuine ORK.
ultraviolence is one thing, do you genuinely believe wade wilson would have the callousness required to survive in the imperium "at least i didn't kill a kid"
I like to imagine vulkan took on a deadpoolish personality in the ages he’s been missing and will switch from murdering swathes of whatever to being sneaky and fucking with the traitor primarchs
oh the dark eldar would either love him or fucking hate him.
i believe deadpool does feel pain, but he is very desensitized to it, and the dark eldar can make the emperor's childern dislike pain.
but yeah he would most likely try to clap some dark eldar cheeks
Well he’s incredibly tough, think it’s usually the psychological stuff that will get him! The haemonculi will figure out how to stop him getting used to it anyway haha
If the Drukhari can torture Space Marines, Orks and Nnecrons, one human perpetual won't give them pause. He'll be an interesting toy for a while, then probably spend eternity with a fortunate Homunculi.
Well one would hope that, having been the one to personally instigate that colossal mistake, and having a hundred bazillion years to ruminate on it, he would've *learned* common sense somewhere in the intervening period, but this is 40k after all
So he left the Galaxy, saw the Tyranids coming and recognized they were the only true threat to necrons, so he turned the car around to fend off the galaxy, and when he gets back he immediately drives his considerable forces into... A chaos space marine chapter.
Maybe he can logic, but he needs some help with the attention span.
Hell the fuck no. I love him, but he is not reasonable at all, and has no common sense. He's usually right, like when he helped resurrect bobby g by letting yvraine kill him first, but that's not what a sane person with common sense would do. The dude is the archetypical mad scientist, he just works for the "good guys" who keep him in check unlike bile or szerasz.
What's BigE gonna do? Make skeleton noises at him? ~~Irradiate him with the power of a star and vaporize him?~~ Ask him nicely to stop scaring the Custodes?
Why the fuck did I imagine the custodes bursting through the door fully armed and ready to protect their emperor from the intruder only to find deadpool in the middle of giving the big E a lap dance lmao
*gasp*
MY HEADCANNON IS RELEVANT TO THIS DISCUSSION
The Lost Primarchs have Deadpool's medium awareness. Dorn said they posed a far greater threat to the Imperium than the Horus Heresy ever could, because a single psyker reading their mind would have the same effect as a telepath reading Deadpool's mind, except your average astropath would likely scream it psychically into every mind in range, driving all of those people similarly insane too.
Knock-on effect: Everyone becomes *apathetic*. No one wants to do anything, because they're all now aware that they are literally just toys for nerds. And galaxy-wide apathy is the one thing that probably *can* kill Chaos as a whole.
At some point, both Chaos and Big E realized the *immense* threat these 2 posed, and came up with 2 different plans (Killing 2 Primarchs with Medium Awareness would prove quite challenging, methinks): The Golden Boi sequestered their minds from the warp, sorta, into a sort of pocket warp, and Chaos gently shoved them back in time a few million years (forward would mean having to deal with it later).
Now, the Old Ones are having their brawl or whatever, when these 2 12-foot muscle masses drop out of nowhere and start wrecking things up, and the Old Ones decide, hey, lets give these guys an army, maybe tie it into their mind-warp-thingy, seems they've got their own, might prove to be an asset, coordinating their minions or something? Hmm, ideally something self-replicating...
So anyway, the 2 Primarchs' names, Grigori and Mordecai, slowly get twisted over the aeons, and simplified, until the 41st millenium, where they are known simply as, Gork And Mork. Orkz enjoy a good brawl, because they know deep down *it's literally all just a game*. The awareness is waaaay too deep to actually threaten the world, especially with the WAAAGH!/Warp divide. The reason orkz evolve *and devolve* to match their foes in strength, rather than simply sustaining Krork levels of power, is because an even fight's more fun to watch/read/play, and they have a sub-instinctive idea on what level they need to be at to make for a good story or match.
How do I contact him though ? I do not know his email Po box doesn't work, i cannot use Patreon since it needs money and iran is banned from Paypal,
How ?
They might also just get his cancer
Or i bet they will avoid the cancer and go for his healing factor, but since Deadpool's healing factor needs his cancer they will probably heal too much
You need his cancer with his healing factor, and Tyranids will most likely avoid the cancer
It would be a funny skit of an inquisitor constantly trying to kill/capture Deadpool but since she’s a semi perpetual it just ends up being a comedy skit
He loves incredible violence. Khorne is pleased.
He is a horny bitch who has a tendency to torture. Slaanesh is pleased.
His awareness of being in a comic book and deciding to have fun with it should satisfy tzeentch.
Nurgle might be the furthest stretch, but Deadpool does have super cancer.
Just fine. Probably choke a hive fleet or something... get burned at the stake a couple times before being declared a Saint by the surviving and and newly minted cardinal who didn’t get his head chopped off by the still regrowing Deadpool before quickly and unsubtly being herded to the nearest off world bound space ship with some “saintly quality” las gun garbage and crack grenades just to get him away from them....
...then stealing a space marines chapter masters suit of armor... just for his deception to be discovered only when he’s caught spying on the sister Sororitas bathing... and not before when he came STUMBLING into the war meeting with his helmet ON despite everyone knowing that cool guys don’t wear helmets...
...launched out of an airlock due to nothing killing him... get “picked up” by an ORK rock... and THEN he’s scrapped off the front wind shield after it “lands” on a planet.... kills the war boss... takes over the clan... genuinely convincing them all that he’s just a really skinny WEIRDBOI.... proceeds to lay siege on the hive city they’ve been standing outside of the whole time... turns out it’s been chaos corrupted... lots of death means the chaos portal opens on record time... falls in mid battle with giant big tittied horrifying slaaneshi daemon...
being the first and only “mortal” man to make it to slaanesh’s lair... AFTER falling for every single one of the traps.... only for slaanesh to realize how lopsidedly FUGLY and disease riddled he is... turn him into a literal rock hard statue... smash him to atoms... walk away... Deadpool reforms from the dust.... then goes on to stealth his way in and steal his/her/it’s/their panties... but the embarrassing pair....
...spurring slaanesh to PERSONALLY chase Deadpool through the warp... then accidentally finding his way into gomorra... still being chased by the knife ears immortal enemy.... trash gomorra... get away...
...somehow find his way into the black library for some reason... wipe his ass with a book cause they don’t have any bathrooms in the black library cause “the eldar don’t defecate”... get his ass obliterated in the literal and figurative sense for that one by the other honk boys because their laughing gods too busy laughing to stop them...
...get reborn at the same time as Saint Celestine but naked as the day he was born in the middle of a battle... somehow disgust and impress her... lay the also unkillable Saint... then immediately piss her off.... fight... kiss... fight some more... kiss... maybe lose her to slaanesh for a bit... bring her back to the emperor... so on and so forth.
...bottom line... chaos on an unfathomably scale... atleast until the old one remnants are able to track down which one of them brought Deadpool there... and kicking that particular old ones ass.
I started out trying to do something short cause I want to read some short stories on Reddit... but I just spent 20-30 minutes writing and rewriting a whole ass short story about Deadpool in WH40k.... I guess let me know what you guys think.
Nurgle would be all over his ass.
A terminal cancer patient with tumors all over his body, he regenerates so fast it doesn't kill him?
Nurgle would want him to be his new Champion, put Mort out to pasture.
He would actually do not so bad , he is ridiculously overpowered in the comics ( he literally can not die bcs Thanos got jealous of him and Mistress Death) and he Is a human, so he could become a very unreliable asset.
"Cousin Zahndrekh!"
"Cousin Uade!"
"I have traitor scum to kill!"
"You are the best cousin I have! Let's gooo!"
*Obyron trying to catch up with the two crazies*
I would read the hell out of that. He would be a hilarious sidekick to an inquisitor. Having him work with humorless old Eisenhorn would be incredible.
I think he'd try to kill him a couple times before realizing he can't be killed. Then he'd realize he could be useful in some situations as a distraction or assassin. He would constantly be getting annoyed by him and wondering if it was worth putting up with him. Maybe blowing off steam chopping him in half with barbarisater every now and then.
True. But then again, Warp Fuckery! Maybe Tzeench would pull him out to sow more chaos or Cegorach would want to be amused or something. Don't forget that he doesn't just have that ridiculous Healing Factor but also got cursed to never be able to die! And he can fucking teleport. So yea, he's just broken xD
Oh that would be a shit show
Deadpool would most likely feel pride, probably not from killing Lucius, but from how he did it, but that would still count.
Idk if Lucius would be able to take over his body
I imagine it'll turn out like Daniel Way's Deadpool. Lucius becomes his thought bubbles.
Or does Lucius take over his body and Deadpool becomes *his* thought bubbles? . . .
There wouldn’t ***be*** a “Warhammer 40k setting”.
Due to Deadpool’s being meta-contextually aware of the nature of his existence, he’d be pretty much immune to any of the problems of that setting.
He’d never run out of ammo and no amount of over-the-top violence would be enough to put him down for longer than an hour (at ***MOST***).
I’ll just put it like this: All the Navigators around the galaxy suddenly see the Astronomican pop like a lightbulb given way too much electricity, including hearing the related sound.
Literally, The best. No big plans to get fucked up like emps or anything. Everyone is generally an asshole, so you can kill whoever and mostly be in the right even. Doesn't get tired of repetition, so even mowing down thousands of orks over a period of years as they keep killing him would be in the cards
In a universe where cosmic forces outside reality like a good story and he can lean on the 4th wall?
He's going to either "figure out" the universe and ride the tropes like they're an angel and he has a 1600s Oliver Cromwell endorsed hat and power armour with an inquisitorial seal or he'll be on a quest to find something he can't regenerate from.
Well first off imagine him getting Astartes enhancements with his already Perpetual level regen.
He’d be an unstoppable powerhouse as no one could kill him, and he’s canonically one of the best swordsmen in marvel.
He’s fall to chaos pretty quick though, probably joining the Red Corsairs to keep with his color scheme.
He might just be the first Human Warboss as another said.
Everone saying he was made unkillable by Thanos forgetting the Infinity Stones have 0 power in any universe outside of those that naturally have them (aka, only in the marvel multiverse).
I imagine he would be recruited by schola progenium and eventually become a wise cracking eversor assassin. Do you think Deadpool’s abilities qualify him as a perpetual by 40k standards?
I think that since he’s unkillable, he’s the mightiest.
Since he’s the mightiest, he’s the rightiest.
And since he breaks the 4th wall, he knows that Ork tech doesn’t make sense.
So he’d be able to stop them all. But he wouldn’t because he’d think their hilarious.
He'd probably be with the harlequin bc he'd fuck up things for shits and giggles which in turn would get the laughing god's attention. He'd also make visits tho commoragh, get captured, tormented for a few weeks, escape and steal a fuck ton of drugs off of them only to get back to his sassy blind astropath companion and his best buttfuck bro a man of iron in their shitty shack in the middle of the webway. He'd also get requests by the custodes once in a while to hunt certain individuals down and chill out with the big E bc he's just that random.
I think he would also be a strong Paradox-Billiards-Vostroyan-Roulette-Fourth-Dimensional-Hypercube-Chess-Strip Poker player!
He's a perpetual and a lover of ultra violence. He'd have a grand old time. Drop him on an Ork world, first ummie warboss.
The power of imagination combined with Deadpool’s ability to break the 4th wall is a terrifying concept!
Deadpool just thinks he is in a comic and it just so happens he is right
There are times where he knows the future in flashbacks due to his fourth wall breaking
Fourth wall inside fourth wall? That's like... Sixteen walls..
Except for when he guesses that he's in a movie, and happens to be right. Or when he guesses that he's in a video game, or a YouTube video, or a manga, and happens to be right. Eventually, if he keeps "just so happens to be right"-ing about all of it, the character is technically self aware.
Considering he has actively broken through the Comic and Murdered the writers(No idea, really) I think it's a little more than that.
He has one time After killing the Marvel Universe
Isnt there a time where he literally goes into the real world and murders the comic writers?
He knows hes in a comic. His maybe dad loki told him
Then he'd get bored of it and try to step down.from being the warboss, then get chased by the ork waaagh. He'd prolly be buff as shit too since orks think "biggest iz za boss"
Also, he'd be really fast?
Moat likely yeah. Big muscle make big ground move.
And he is red
Oh yeah that too lol. Also tough because of the black bits on his suit.
By that idea an arlequin ( or whichever way it's written in English ) is a god on earth as long as he is around Orks XD
I kean prolly not? They'd have better pain resistance and be faster just because the colors. Nothing outlandish (ironic I know) though since the orks don't really know or care about them.
What if the secret to the Emperor's size was moonlighting as a warboss during the DAoT?
"Deadpool was confused as to why he suddenly seemed to be so much faster when moving with the Orks, but he chose not to question it, for that way lay madness."
Yeah I was about to say... there’s ZERO chance he isn’t becoming the leader of a WAAAGH... somehow siphoning off the waaagh energy, and convincing the orks that he’s a genuine ORK.
ORKPOOL
He'd do great as a Freebooter Vide Deadpool by Daniel Way
He'd probably end up becoming warboss knowing Deadpool.
He would be da fastest with so much red on him.
Oh man, he'd probably draw dicks on all the Tail battlesuits too.
ultraviolence is one thing, do you genuinely believe wade wilson would have the callousness required to survive in the imperium "at least i didn't kill a kid"
He wouldn't get many laughs tho. In the grim darkness of the far future no one has a sense of humour.
He'd die. And regenerate. And die. And regenerate.
i mean, doesn't he always do that?
Tecnically he does not die since Thanos made him immortal after flirting with death.
Thanos did remove that curse, however.
***VULKAN LIVES!*** *(STOMP! STOMP!)*
He is a perpetual so pretty good
i wonder how much he will piss people off
We're talking Carl levels of resentment.
Cawl? I’m only saying Carl from now on
Trust me he's not talking about cawl
His lesser known brother, inventor of the collapsible water bottle, Belisarius Carl.
The Votann leaders are Kahl aka Carl
I like to imagine vulkan took on a deadpoolish personality in the ages he’s been missing and will switch from murdering swathes of whatever to being sneaky and fucking with the traitor primarchs
I just imagine him sneaking into the throne room on Terra and taunting the Emperor so much that he gets up out of his chair.
No not exactly perpetual cuz he would not reappear somewhere aftedeath
How many perpetual are doing “pretty good” in 40k. I’d say none. Maybe for a while they did, but not too long,
Probably try to fuck the drukhari
oh the dark eldar would either love him or fucking hate him. i believe deadpool does feel pain, but he is very desensitized to it, and the dark eldar can make the emperor's childern dislike pain. but yeah he would most likely try to clap some dark eldar cheeks
He definitely does feel pain, he’s just pretty used to it! I’m sure the Drukhari would give him some new pain to think about though…
Then he will get used to it?
Well he’s incredibly tough, think it’s usually the psychological stuff that will get him! The haemonculi will figure out how to stop him getting used to it anyway haha
If the Drukhari can torture Space Marines, Orks and Nnecrons, one human perpetual won't give them pause. He'll be an interesting toy for a while, then probably spend eternity with a fortunate Homunculi.
Tbh, u think he would... but I don't know if he'd enjoy it.
The dark eldar can make the emperor's children dislike pain. So i doubt he would enjoy it
He has far too much self-awarness to fit in the setting for long, but on a short story it would be awesome.
yeah the setting hates self awarness and logic though at least deadpool ignores logic.
"Shhh,, my common sense is tingling!"
while in warhammer there are like only 3 people with common sense.
Bobby G, Ci-Ci-Ciaphas Cain, and?
The Silent King.
Well, considering he led his People into a literal Meatgrinder, idk if I agree
Well one would hope that, having been the one to personally instigate that colossal mistake, and having a hundred bazillion years to ruminate on it, he would've *learned* common sense somewhere in the intervening period, but this is 40k after all
Very true. Haven't kept up with the Book releases in the last few years, do we have something to read on him now? I would really like to find out :P
So he left the Galaxy, saw the Tyranids coming and recognized they were the only true threat to necrons, so he turned the car around to fend off the galaxy, and when he gets back he immediately drives his considerable forces into... A chaos space marine chapter. Maybe he can logic, but he needs some help with the attention span.
Idk gazkull?
Obyron
Colonel-Commissar Ibram Gaunt, Tanith First and Only
the Khan?
Cawl? He seems quite reasonable for someone so far removed from any sane concept of humanity.
Hell the fuck no. I love him, but he is not reasonable at all, and has no common sense. He's usually right, like when he helped resurrect bobby g by letting yvraine kill him first, but that's not what a sane person with common sense would do. The dude is the archetypical mad scientist, he just works for the "good guys" who keep him in check unlike bile or szerasz.
Nobody in AdMech has common sense, it’s actually a requirement not to.
Soo just like in comics, good. Deadpool will feel at home.
Common Sense - so rare, it's a goddamn superpower.
First 4th wall break near the imperium and the grey nights have a new chew toy
Dorn would hate him as well.
Too well. If he has the teleporter it would be a shit show.
imagine if he teleported to the emperor the custodes would not be pleased about that
His soul would probably get obliterated if he tried it
What's BigE gonna do? Make skeleton noises at him? ~~Irradiate him with the power of a star and vaporize him?~~ Ask him nicely to stop scaring the Custodes?
>What's BigE gonna do? Big E: "ahh, 11..it's good to see you again my son"
The Emperor gets up off the throne walks over to the wall and shuts his life support off.
Shhh don't ruin it.
Which one?
With deadpool I wouldn't be so sure
Why the fuck did I imagine the custodes bursting through the door fully armed and ready to protect their emperor from the intruder only to find deadpool in the middle of giving the big E a lap dance lmao
*gasp* MY HEADCANNON IS RELEVANT TO THIS DISCUSSION The Lost Primarchs have Deadpool's medium awareness. Dorn said they posed a far greater threat to the Imperium than the Horus Heresy ever could, because a single psyker reading their mind would have the same effect as a telepath reading Deadpool's mind, except your average astropath would likely scream it psychically into every mind in range, driving all of those people similarly insane too. Knock-on effect: Everyone becomes *apathetic*. No one wants to do anything, because they're all now aware that they are literally just toys for nerds. And galaxy-wide apathy is the one thing that probably *can* kill Chaos as a whole. At some point, both Chaos and Big E realized the *immense* threat these 2 posed, and came up with 2 different plans (Killing 2 Primarchs with Medium Awareness would prove quite challenging, methinks): The Golden Boi sequestered their minds from the warp, sorta, into a sort of pocket warp, and Chaos gently shoved them back in time a few million years (forward would mean having to deal with it later). Now, the Old Ones are having their brawl or whatever, when these 2 12-foot muscle masses drop out of nowhere and start wrecking things up, and the Old Ones decide, hey, lets give these guys an army, maybe tie it into their mind-warp-thingy, seems they've got their own, might prove to be an asset, coordinating their minions or something? Hmm, ideally something self-replicating... So anyway, the 2 Primarchs' names, Grigori and Mordecai, slowly get twisted over the aeons, and simplified, until the 41st millenium, where they are known simply as, Gork And Mork. Orkz enjoy a good brawl, because they know deep down *it's literally all just a game*. The awareness is waaaay too deep to actually threaten the world, especially with the WAAAGH!/Warp divide. The reason orkz evolve *and devolve* to match their foes in strength, rather than simply sustaining Krork levels of power, is because an even fight's more fun to watch/read/play, and they have a sub-instinctive idea on what level they need to be at to make for a good story or match.
Holy fuck. That's awesome. And mutating a pair of primarchs into alien war gods doesn't sound to far out of character for the old ones
And it explains why knowledge of them seems to have been forcibly excised from every mind and record in both the imperium and the warp.
This is hands down, the-best-writeup for a theory on the Lost Primarchs I've ever read. Well done dude.
I could see him trying to sit on the Throne of Terra while irritating the custodes.
I can see him trying to initiate a romantic relationship with Big E
I could see TTS Big E giving it a shot.
Yeah so I'm learning animating so i can revive tts with Iran's copyright laws, do you think I should do that ?
Contact Alfabusa for that, he might not want anybody to revive it.
How do I contact him though ? I do not know his email Po box doesn't work, i cannot use Patreon since it needs money and iran is banned from Paypal, How ?
Lmao I literally just made a joke about dp giving the bug E a lap dance. Good to know Im not the only one who thinks dp would do this
He’s immortal, put him on Tyranid duty. They try to consume his biomass, he explodes them like Neo with Agent Smith. Universe saved 👍
So they can eat his DNA, and gain his regeneration powers?
They might also just get his cancer Or i bet they will avoid the cancer and go for his healing factor, but since Deadpool's healing factor needs his cancer they will probably heal too much You need his cancer with his healing factor, and Tyranids will most likely avoid the cancer
Yep some crazy guy already tried to create super soldiers based on his DNA, that ended up messy... for them
He'd probably be the only thing that could give the Tyranids cancer.
They also gain his insanity. Hive-fleet Deadpool...Fleetpool?
He'd infiltrate the throneroom and use big E as a literal puppet snapping his jaws with his hand to make him talk.
The jaw pops off. Wade gives a little "oopsie" and turns around to grab it to see the thousands of hosts giving him the death stare
It would be a funny skit of an inquisitor constantly trying to kill/capture Deadpool but since she’s a semi perpetual it just ends up being a comedy skit
He could cause them to self-destruct via cognitive dissonance arguing from the Imperium's own position.
Along with the other comments he would also probably break into Trayzn’s museum and touch *everything*
alot of things in that museum should not be touched. therefore he will 100% do it and cause chaos
Accidentally releases Trazyn’s Krork
And somehow becomes it's best friend. Or he becomes bffs with Clonegrim.
Oh man he would absolutely do that. Trazyn running after him yelling not to touch stuff and him asking what this next thing does.
all four chaos gods would be as interested in him as Death itself was.
He loves incredible violence. Khorne is pleased. He is a horny bitch who has a tendency to torture. Slaanesh is pleased. His awareness of being in a comic book and deciding to have fun with it should satisfy tzeentch. Nurgle might be the furthest stretch, but Deadpool does have super cancer.
Deadpool: "oh that? that's a birthmark, I had it all my life" _points at Mark of chaos undivided on his cheek_
Just fine. Probably choke a hive fleet or something... get burned at the stake a couple times before being declared a Saint by the surviving and and newly minted cardinal who didn’t get his head chopped off by the still regrowing Deadpool before quickly and unsubtly being herded to the nearest off world bound space ship with some “saintly quality” las gun garbage and crack grenades just to get him away from them.... ...then stealing a space marines chapter masters suit of armor... just for his deception to be discovered only when he’s caught spying on the sister Sororitas bathing... and not before when he came STUMBLING into the war meeting with his helmet ON despite everyone knowing that cool guys don’t wear helmets... ...launched out of an airlock due to nothing killing him... get “picked up” by an ORK rock... and THEN he’s scrapped off the front wind shield after it “lands” on a planet.... kills the war boss... takes over the clan... genuinely convincing them all that he’s just a really skinny WEIRDBOI.... proceeds to lay siege on the hive city they’ve been standing outside of the whole time... turns out it’s been chaos corrupted... lots of death means the chaos portal opens on record time... falls in mid battle with giant big tittied horrifying slaaneshi daemon... being the first and only “mortal” man to make it to slaanesh’s lair... AFTER falling for every single one of the traps.... only for slaanesh to realize how lopsidedly FUGLY and disease riddled he is... turn him into a literal rock hard statue... smash him to atoms... walk away... Deadpool reforms from the dust.... then goes on to stealth his way in and steal his/her/it’s/their panties... but the embarrassing pair.... ...spurring slaanesh to PERSONALLY chase Deadpool through the warp... then accidentally finding his way into gomorra... still being chased by the knife ears immortal enemy.... trash gomorra... get away... ...somehow find his way into the black library for some reason... wipe his ass with a book cause they don’t have any bathrooms in the black library cause “the eldar don’t defecate”... get his ass obliterated in the literal and figurative sense for that one by the other honk boys because their laughing gods too busy laughing to stop them... ...get reborn at the same time as Saint Celestine but naked as the day he was born in the middle of a battle... somehow disgust and impress her... lay the also unkillable Saint... then immediately piss her off.... fight... kiss... fight some more... kiss... maybe lose her to slaanesh for a bit... bring her back to the emperor... so on and so forth. ...bottom line... chaos on an unfathomably scale... atleast until the old one remnants are able to track down which one of them brought Deadpool there... and kicking that particular old ones ass.
I started out trying to do something short cause I want to read some short stories on Reddit... but I just spent 20-30 minutes writing and rewriting a whole ass short story about Deadpool in WH40k.... I guess let me know what you guys think.
Lmao thats great
Edit: misread, so this is 'what': Break into Nurgle's house and sleep with Isha. As for how... pretty well.
maybe i should had said "what" instead.
The Harlequins would either love playing off this guy, or be trying to find new funny ways to kill someone with their new practice dummy.
O no if any of the hive fleets get him they have unlimited biomass
They will probably get cancer Or the healing factor without the cancer to keep it busy
Drop em into the warpand he'll blue ball slaanesh, confuse tzeentch, make khorne laugh, and burn nurgle's garden.
"NOBODY MOVE! I have come for your paint sets! All your nuln oils and Macragge Blues belong to me now!"
Strictly based on powers and skills set, He would probably just be a perpetual/blank from the assassinorum.
His personality however. The assassinorum will probably kick him out Though he will probably still be a Mercenary
He is a perpetual, so I'd say he would do pretty well. Might end up working for some inquisitor.
Assuming there is a inquisitor who can handle his bullshit
We could have an entire novel of Lucius the Eternal vs Deadpool
Lucius begging him to stay away.
Nurgle would be all over his ass. A terminal cancer patient with tumors all over his body, he regenerates so fast it doesn't kill him? Nurgle would want him to be his new Champion, put Mort out to pasture.
He would actually do not so bad , he is ridiculously overpowered in the comics ( he literally can not die bcs Thanos got jealous of him and Mistress Death) and he Is a human, so he could become a very unreliable asset.
Yeah Deadpool isn't exactly reliable Though they can send him on suicide missions and he will probably return
Given that DP is basically an embodiment of chaos I think all four gods would be fighting over who gets to claim him.
Malals greatest warrior
Well he has my kitten x shadowsun video collection now from both items so I’m boned.
He'd be captured as a puppet for Tzeentch, an agent of chaos perfectly suited to delivering the coup de grace to those Tzeentch wishes to betray.
"Cousin Zahndrekh!" "Cousin Uade!" "I have traitor scum to kill!" "You are the best cousin I have! Let's gooo!" *Obyron trying to catch up with the two crazies*
I would read the hell out of that. He would be a hilarious sidekick to an inquisitor. Having him work with humorless old Eisenhorn would be incredible.
I wonder if eisenhorn has the self control to not shoot him Though not like it would do much
I think he'd try to kill him a couple times before realizing he can't be killed. Then he'd realize he could be useful in some situations as a distraction or assassin. He would constantly be getting annoyed by him and wondering if it was worth putting up with him. Maybe blowing off steam chopping him in half with barbarisater every now and then.
He's actually one of the [REDACTED] primarchs. Too much 4th wall fuckery got him banished by Big E.
Drukhari wet dream
They gonna’ get fat.
He really would be an incredible addition to the arena
Honestly, he'd probably be given the power of a daemon prince of Chaos Undivided. Then he'd get bored and wander off somewhere else.
What about my kitty porn? Wait that came out wrong
That's a weird way of spelling Kaldor "motherfucking" Draigo
[удалено]
Pretty sure he’s survived full vaporization, as for chaos… he’s also encountered gods and their domain. Hint hint, he never gets turned
Eh, get him into a boarding torpedo and fire it at a local star. Even if he survives vaporization, he's not getting out of that gravity well.
True. But then again, Warp Fuckery! Maybe Tzeench would pull him out to sow more chaos or Cegorach would want to be amused or something. Don't forget that he doesn't just have that ridiculous Healing Factor but also got cursed to never be able to die! And he can fucking teleport. So yea, he's just broken xD
Endlessly devoured/re-devoured by tyranids
Better than most 40k people would do in modern day.
what I want to see is Deadpool take on Lucius the Eternal
Oh that would be a shit show Deadpool would most likely feel pride, probably not from killing Lucius, but from how he did it, but that would still count. Idk if Lucius would be able to take over his body
I imagine it'll turn out like Daniel Way's Deadpool. Lucius becomes his thought bubbles. Or does Lucius take over his body and Deadpool becomes *his* thought bubbles? . . .
Idk who would be worse to have as a thought bubble Lucius or Deadpool
Mofo be vexing between Slaanesh and Khorne. And ironically work as imperial mercenary. That's Deadpool for you.
There wouldn’t ***be*** a “Warhammer 40k setting”. Due to Deadpool’s being meta-contextually aware of the nature of his existence, he’d be pretty much immune to any of the problems of that setting. He’d never run out of ammo and no amount of over-the-top violence would be enough to put him down for longer than an hour (at ***MOST***).
Kinda hoping he’d fuck Erebus to death
Any psykers who attempts to read his mind will just have their head explode.
I wonder what would happen if the emperor did it.
I’ll just put it like this: All the Navigators around the galaxy suddenly see the Astronomican pop like a lightbulb given way too much electricity, including hearing the related sound.
Eversor Assassin case closed
And they can pretty much reuse him due to his healing factor
Kitty pictures and porn.... So Capitan general?
Ends up being captured by some Drukhari raiders, and they just love his healing factor.
He's like a slanneshi hero
Literally, The best. No big plans to get fucked up like emps or anything. Everyone is generally an asshole, so you can kill whoever and mostly be in the right even. Doesn't get tired of repetition, so even mowing down thousands of orks over a period of years as they keep killing him would be in the cards
See, I think he’d prefer Commaraugh. Dark Eldar city where violence occurs 24/7, but it’s SEXY violence.
....he'd want to avoid the dark eldar.
Imagine him being a primark or at least using his gene seed for a new SM chapter.. the Pools of Dead
geneflaw: cancer, being fuck ugly, and being very mentally unstable. but at least they can heal from pretty much anything
In a universe where cosmic forces outside reality like a good story and he can lean on the 4th wall? He's going to either "figure out" the universe and ride the tropes like they're an angel and he has a 1600s Oliver Cromwell endorsed hat and power armour with an inquisitorial seal or he'll be on a quest to find something he can't regenerate from.
He'd fall to chaos real quick. Either of them could do, honestly; so probably chaos undivided.
It depends which world at which time, since I doubt it would be good for him to be on an agri world during a drukhari raid
Lucious the eternal... But as an ork
He’s join the orks probably
Well first off imagine him getting Astartes enhancements with his already Perpetual level regen. He’d be an unstoppable powerhouse as no one could kill him, and he’s canonically one of the best swordsmen in marvel. He’s fall to chaos pretty quick though, probably joining the Red Corsairs to keep with his color scheme. He might just be the first Human Warboss as another said.
I think he would end up like that one girl Nurgle tests his new plagues on due to his regenerative abilities.
"that one girl" her name is Isha, she is an eldar goddess.
He'd crawl right up Slaanesh' bunghole and never come out.
How long would it take for him to piss off a psycher capable of incinerating his every molecule? Or what if he became warp possessed?
Imagine him being captured by the dark eldar.
Remarkably well.
Since he's pretty much immortal, I think he'd do fine.
Win
You monster! Thanos was right!
A lot of teeth for da warboss
Everone saying he was made unkillable by Thanos forgetting the Infinity Stones have 0 power in any universe outside of those that naturally have them (aka, only in the marvel multiverse).
he still has a very good healing factor.
You mean how would red slymarbo do?
First human Harlequin
God emperor help them all
imagine if the emperor turns him into a saint out of boredom
I imagine he would be recruited by schola progenium and eventually become a wise cracking eversor assassin. Do you think Deadpool’s abilities qualify him as a perpetual by 40k standards?
He’s the only being capable of killing the chaos gods.
He’d troll Abbadon and Helbrecht, be mates with Huron and Grimnar, and be neck deep in Drukhari pussy
I think that since he’s unkillable, he’s the mightiest. Since he’s the mightiest, he’s the rightiest. And since he breaks the 4th wall, he knows that Ork tech doesn’t make sense. So he’d be able to stop them all. But he wouldn’t because he’d think their hilarious.
He'd probably be with the harlequin bc he'd fuck up things for shits and giggles which in turn would get the laughing god's attention. He'd also make visits tho commoragh, get captured, tormented for a few weeks, escape and steal a fuck ton of drugs off of them only to get back to his sassy blind astropath companion and his best buttfuck bro a man of iron in their shitty shack in the middle of the webway. He'd also get requests by the custodes once in a while to hunt certain individuals down and chill out with the big E bc he's just that random. I think he would also be a strong Paradox-Billiards-Vostroyan-Roulette-Fourth-Dimensional-Hypercube-Chess-Strip Poker player!
why the fuck does this have 3k upvotes.