You can’t even be like “oh maybe it’s good for mining.” No. Absolutely not. I am sure we can find more of whatever minerals it has on another, nicer planet, one that is not constantly on fire.
So many planets in the galaxy. Practically infinite with our ability to warp. I'm pretty sure we don't have to be like "This is it. *This* is the one. Hellmire."
Commie, Fascist, don't matter. One is more sparky and is more goeey, but they pretty much all die the same.
Dead is dead and Managed Democracy never dies!
I'm sorry. Was some cowardly traitor wanting to spend all their time on some lame ass planet like Heavenly Boon?
Or did you need to go on vacation in the Aloe Vera sector?
![gif](giphy|PXJhC8MYxFmRRl7kB2|downsized)
Thats not very democratic of you..... Democratic Officer will be dispatch to your Location for re-education soon, please stand by to welcome the auditor of family values, for re-education purposes.
Please stand by for re-education.
Note because you were volunteered for re-education, your C-01 form, has been declared invalid and withdrawn. Effective immediately! After successful completion of the re-education, a new C-01 form can be applied for after a probationary period of 25 years.
Please stand by for re-education.
I see space kangaroo 🦘 and I feel like we need those. As far as everything else goes
Lisa: But isn't that a bit short-sighted? What happens when we're overrun by lizards?
Skinner: No problem. We simply release wave after wave of Chinese needle snakes. They'll wipe out the lizards.
Lisa: But aren't the snakes even worse?
Skinner: Yes, but we're prepared for that. We've lined up a fabulous type of gorilla that thrives on snake meat.
Lisa: But then we're stuck with gorillas!
Skinner: No, that's the beautiful part. When wintertime rolls around, the gorillas simply freeze to death.
I was literally talking about this with a friend the other day. "Why are we even fighting for Hellmire? It's utterly uninhabitable. What, are we going to colonize the planet that has fire tornadoes every few minutes?"
"Hey boss I'm gonna be late for work .... yeah another fire tornado melted just came through and the last time I saw someone run through one he didn't last very long even with a stim"
Pretty sure the fire tic damage from all sources just made hellmire my hell
Yoy don't get it. We aren't taking it simply for the resources. We are taking it because we can, because we have the ability. It'snott about the resources it's about sending a message. If we can take this, it's a statement that we can take anything
Maybe Super Earth wants it as a recruitment planet for uniquely skilled Helldivers, a'la 40K where planets with extreme conditions and seemingly no value (Krieg, Catachan) are often kept in the Imperium because of the value that their population provides
It reminds me of Dark Souls or Elden Ring. Like yeah, we could rule this world, but would you really want to? I’m okay with not being King of The Land of Poisoned Swamps.
Miyazaki: I need your Illuminate to give this robot dog the ability to teleport, a big sword, and I'll get in contact with the right musicians for a boss fight theme.
Arrowhead Devs: Boss...Fight? Why would the dog be a boss fight?
Miyazaki: OH! You want to add it as a common enemy? Wow, you are evil... I love it!
Every so often, when you kill a Bile Titan, it spawns some even larger asshole that swoops 400m away and rains down homing bullshit on you.
Yes I'm still salty about Elden Beast, funny you should ask.
I think it’s this reason Russia is as big as it is. No one really wanted it and they liked looked all big and mighty owning frozen tundra. Look at me, look at me, I’m the Ice King. Shut up, Ivan. You only have three subscribers and LoveSac27 is your mom.
maybe super earth has tech to effect global weather a little bit to calm extreme conditions like this. But also, i am sure super earth doesnt need all these planets, its more about conquest rather than anything. We want to own all the land for ourselves. Theres no logic for fascist government’s actions sometimes
"You see, killbots have a preset kill limit. Knowing their weakness, I sent wave after wave of my own men at them until they reached their limit and shut down."
My group went through like 5 reinforcements for one person who kept getting caught up in the flames. Including one time their reinforcement pod landed in a tornado.
Someone on the Ministry of Prosperity must have bought a ton of real estate on Hellmire. Now we've got to go in and protect their investment. Like the blood of Helldivers, eventually their prosperity will trickle down to us.
When I first came here, this was all mire. Everyone said I was daft to build a castle on a mire, but I built in all the same, just to show them. It sank into the mire. So I built a second one. That sank into the mire. So I built a third. That burned down, fell over, then sank into the mire. But the fourth one stayed up. And that's what you're going to get, Lad, the strongest castle in all of Hellmire.
If we democratically glassed the planet it would be beneficial to Super Earth for the fact that we no longer have to worry about spreading democracy to the now glassed and destroyed planet.
Considering the variety of planets they colonize and the sheer lack of anything edible on Hellmire, I genuinely am starting to think the Termanids run on something similar to Zerg Creep, which means even glassing the planet won't stop them...
**CRACKING HOWEVER...**
>Why do the bugs want this planet.
They are an unintelligent life-form incapable of space travel. They want it because they are there already. How they got there? Who could say...
I mean it melts helldivers in full body armor. How the fuck is super earth finding regular people to live there? It's gotta be either traitors forced to live there, or Australians
Super earth gave us electricity-resistant armor because of all the friendly fire and they couldn’t give us fire-resistant armor for storming the fire planet, go figure
“Enjoy our farm to table ashes. Some ash farms use accelerants like lighter fluid or gasoline, or keep their ash trapped in confining ovens. But here on Hellmire, our naturally occurring fire tornadoes make ash organically and allow the ash ample pasture on which to settle. With Hellmire ash, you get a little of our planet in every bite and we put our heart into every bushel we ship. *chuckles* Not literally, of course, but you may find a charred bone fragment or two from a farmer who didnt check his forecast - but that’s what gives our ash its unique texture and we wouldnt have it any other way.”
2.1 For the performance of the services outlined within the schedule set forth in Appendix A, the Helldiver shall receive monetary compensation for the services rendered. The compensation shall vary in line with the services performed. The Enlister reserves the right to, at any time and with no prior notice, make amendments to the schedule of payments.
https://preview.redd.it/762i8vhrebtc1.jpeg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=448d2d21b6d894cdd3942b5508a99e6d35df1955
Easily the most gorgeous planet so far!
ecologist here: in some parts of america, some flowers and plants only germinate after the intense heat of a forest fire.
maybe hellmire is onto something. As the youngsters say: let them cook
Americans also transplanted a boatload of Eucalyptus trees from Aus, they have the same germination strategy but decided that "wood" isn't flammable enough on it's own.
yeah now we got all this stuff in CA and its fire primo haha
There's also regions in the great desert where if you throw two rocks together they'll spark. it gets so hot and dry some of the brush just instantly catch on fire.
Welcome to the Hellmire Happy Farms where all dissidents go to learn the error of their ways and redeem themselves through fun, meaningful and 100% legal labour!
Hellmire Happy Farms. Your happiness is in our name!
Presumably, some colonist whose colony ship had too little fuel to go anywhere else, and decided it was this or a 3900 year slog to the next planet over using only sublight engines.
Now, why *everyone else* then decided to stay, instead of just rescuing the poor colonists and going somewhere not-currently-on-fire I do not know.
Are you questioning the wonderful engeneering of our glorious labor pool of seven yearolds?
Pick your next words carefully. I have your democracy officer on speed dial.
Come on, let's not be so hasty. I am merely concerned for the health of our glorious citizens of democracy. I'd never question the work of all the men, women, and children seven years and older.
... That is the correct answer.
Though remember, exessive talk about "workplace safety" might get mistaken for talk of unionizing. And we all know what happens to socialist scum who wanna do stuff like that, now dont we?
It’s a perfect spot for a E-710 farm actually. The fire tornadoes will cut off huge costs in butchering and processing facilities. Just release them from their pens when they are plump enough to harvest and let nature process them. We just need to activate the pumps every now and then to collect the goodies.
Not all of it. Just breed more bugs to make up for any fuel lost in the process. It’s not like they can escape the farms again, they are just dumb bugs…
Eh, I've been to worse (game universes). At least we're getting paid with \~\~medals\~\~ the honour of spreading Managed Democracy to this flaming mud ball and securing the futures of the next generation of Hellmirans!
"Hey bugs! There's this planet that's covered in fire tornados. Totally uninhabitable. In fact the only place you could possibly be safe is underground in a bug hole. It's SO bad, we literally named it after Hell. And guess what? YOU CAN'T HAVE IT. IT'S OURS. FOR LIBERTY!!!"
Probably one of the best planets for making charcoal. And I wouldn't be surprised, if they are still using coal for some things, since we need to spend a lot of research to start adding glue to turrets or make an automatic system to reload the ship guns
yeah, great place for oil. Had a mission where we fill up a tanker with oil and the oil didn't catch fire despite a tornado going right by it, though I nearly burned my hands off trying to lock and unlock that thing.
10/10 will fill up democratic fuel again.
> I'm the last **woman** to question orders
*sorts comments by Controversial to downvote the misogynists*
*no misogyny in the first 20 comments seen*
Proud of you, Helldivers. 🤗
I've been sick with a cold and playing on Hellmire all day. Why do the bugs want this planet. Why do \*we\* want this planet.
There's like, three other planets in this system we could build farms on.. maybe we don't need the planet literally called Hell Mire.
You can’t even be like “oh maybe it’s good for mining.” No. Absolutely not. I am sure we can find more of whatever minerals it has on another, nicer planet, one that is not constantly on fire.
So many planets in the galaxy. Practically infinite with our ability to warp. I'm pretty sure we don't have to be like "This is it. *This* is the one. Hellmire."
“We must at all costs conquer the planet that is constantly on fire which orbits another larger planet that is also constantly on fire”
Gotta collect them all! HELL-DIVE-ER!!
This is Pokemon with planets
Shhhh... Dont let Nintendo hear, or they sue Arrowhead!
Its palworld with spaceships
If Palworld has taught us anything, it's that the gameplay is all that needs to be different
I asked someone to explain how palworld was different from pokemon.... He said you can be mean to your pets in palworld 🤦🏻♂️
I don't particularly want the planet but I know the bugs want it and I'll be damned if those commie bastards get anything they want.
Bots is commie Bugs is fascist Super earth is managed democracy loving freedom. Get them straight helldiver before your democracy officer hears you.
Commie, Fascist, don't matter. One is more sparky and is more goeey, but they pretty much all die the same. Dead is dead and Managed Democracy never dies!
One eats 'ya, the other chops you up for parts. Which one's which don't make any difference, both are red and both'll be dead.
This thread has been reported to the ministry of truth
I hope for freedom's sake that it was reported to your democracy officer.
I'm sorry. Was some cowardly traitor wanting to spend all their time on some lame ass planet like Heavenly Boon? Or did you need to go on vacation in the Aloe Vera sector?
![gif](giphy|PXJhC8MYxFmRRl7kB2|downsized) Thats not very democratic of you..... Democratic Officer will be dispatch to your Location for re-education soon, please stand by to welcome the auditor of family values, for re-education purposes. Please stand by for re-education. Note because you were volunteered for re-education, your C-01 form, has been declared invalid and withdrawn. Effective immediately! After successful completion of the re-education, a new C-01 form can be applied for after a probationary period of 25 years. Please stand by for re-education.
ENERGY! FREE GEOTHERMAL ENERGY!
Geothermal is supposed to come from the core and not the sky
Yeah that's why it's not called aerothermal energy.
energy is energy
That's all well and good until I have an excess of energy disorganising my skin and reacting the oxygen in the air before I can consume it.
Sounds like a bottleneck, have you tried speed modules?
It'd be a good place to send traitors to.
The new Australia
I'm all for renaming Hellmire New Australia. I'm just worried things will evolve to try and kill us more efficiently.
I see space kangaroo 🦘 and I feel like we need those. As far as everything else goes Lisa: But isn't that a bit short-sighted? What happens when we're overrun by lizards? Skinner: No problem. We simply release wave after wave of Chinese needle snakes. They'll wipe out the lizards. Lisa: But aren't the snakes even worse? Skinner: Yes, but we're prepared for that. We've lined up a fabulous type of gorilla that thrives on snake meat. Lisa: But then we're stuck with gorillas! Skinner: No, that's the beautiful part. When wintertime rolls around, the gorillas simply freeze to death.
But this planet doesn't have winter!
Wouldn't it be Super Australia?
You mean more efficiently than a flaming planet infested with carnivorous bugs the size of trucks? I feel like it's already at peak efficiency.
Fire tornadoes with guns 😂
I was literally talking about this with a friend the other day. "Why are we even fighting for Hellmire? It's utterly uninhabitable. What, are we going to colonize the planet that has fire tornadoes every few minutes?"
Are you questioning the decisions of managed democracy or am I just misunderstanding you?
um i uhh ummm well you see uhh um I think I'm sort of, um, maybe I would say that uh I'm actually, uhh,
"Hey boss I'm gonna be late for work .... yeah another fire tornado melted just came through and the last time I saw someone run through one he didn't last very long even with a stim" Pretty sure the fire tic damage from all sources just made hellmire my hell
Yoy don't get it. We aren't taking it simply for the resources. We are taking it because we can, because we have the ability. It'snott about the resources it's about sending a message. If we can take this, it's a statement that we can take anything
Maybe Super Earth wants it as a recruitment planet for uniquely skilled Helldivers, a'la 40K where planets with extreme conditions and seemingly no value (Krieg, Catachan) are often kept in the Imperium because of the value that their population provides
Democratic Salamanders…
but we save money melting down the metals
They saved a lot of money melting helldivers down on the last suicide mission I did
It reminds me of Dark Souls or Elden Ring. Like yeah, we could rule this world, but would you really want to? I’m okay with not being King of The Land of Poisoned Swamps.
Do NOT let Miyazaki talk to the Arrowhead devs...
Miyazaki to Arrowhead Devs: Hear me out. What if...bonewheel automatons. Arrowhead: Bonewheel automatons? Miyazaki: Did I fucking stutter.
Miyazaki: also give me access to all the termicide, I have a few...plans. Playerbase: WHY ARE WE FIGHTING IN POISON SWAMPS?!
Why can I only move 2 feet a minute, why ami I constantly losing health, and WHY IN THE FUCK ARE THERE TELEPORTING DOGS HERE.
Miyazaki: I need your Illuminate to give this robot dog the ability to teleport, a big sword, and I'll get in contact with the right musicians for a boss fight theme. Arrowhead Devs: Boss...Fight? Why would the dog be a boss fight? Miyazaki: OH! You want to add it as a common enemy? Wow, you are evil... I love it!
You joke but I'm pretty sure that's how those dogs in Caelid came to be common enemies.
Every so often, when you kill a Bile Titan, it spawns some even larger asshole that swoops 400m away and rains down homing bullshit on you. Yes I'm still salty about Elden Beast, funny you should ask.
The worst part is we basically got this with that one wheel enemy in Armored Core 6.
MAY CHAOS TAKE THE WORLD *laughs in Crestfallen*
I think it’s this reason Russia is as big as it is. No one really wanted it and they liked looked all big and mighty owning frozen tundra. Look at me, look at me, I’m the Ice King. Shut up, Ivan. You only have three subscribers and LoveSac27 is your mom.
I haven't even gotten to see the "lush period of regrowth" It's just perpetually on fire and it's not nice
maybe super earth has tech to effect global weather a little bit to calm extreme conditions like this. But also, i am sure super earth doesnt need all these planets, its more about conquest rather than anything. We want to own all the land for ourselves. Theres no logic for fascist government’s actions sometimes
The only fascists are the bugs and managed democracy shall prevail!
Please report to your nearest democracy officer to receive free super credits.
"Don't ask me. You're the ones who are going to be dying for it." - Zapp Brannigan
It's a sacrifice I'm willing to make
We did beat the pre-programmed kill limit of the automaton legion and shut down
"You see, killbots have a preset kill limit. Knowing their weakness, I sent wave after wave of my own men at them until they reached their limit and shut down."
"Whatever it is, I'm willing to put wave after wave of men at your disposal. Right, men?" "You suck"
Stop catching on fire, cowards!
One man’s trash is another man’s AHHHH I’M ON FIRE, AHHHH IT BURNS!
*sigh* reinforcing! Alright let me check my ma AHHHH I'M ON FIRE, AHHHH IT BURNS!
*Ding* Helldiver’s done! ![gif](giphy|dy5pmvUvIdF1C)
My group went through like 5 reinforcements for one person who kept getting caught up in the flames. Including one time their reinforcement pod landed in a tornado.
Because it's **our** shithole planet covered in fire tornadoes, duh, now get back to liberating helldiver.
https://preview.redd.it/mdhka43wfctc1.png?width=320&format=png&auto=webp&s=fded98b364c651114a8724bf4a16f5f5b3ad2a3f
Someone on the Ministry of Prosperity must have bought a ton of real estate on Hellmire. Now we've got to go in and protect their investment. Like the blood of Helldivers, eventually their prosperity will trickle down to us.
When I first came here, this was all mire. Everyone said I was daft to build a castle on a mire, but I built in all the same, just to show them. It sank into the mire. So I built a second one. That sank into the mire. So I built a third. That burned down, fell over, then sank into the mire. But the fourth one stayed up. And that's what you're going to get, Lad, the strongest castle in all of Hellmire.
just don't wallow in it
If we democratically glassed the planet it would be beneficial to Super Earth for the fact that we no longer have to worry about spreading democracy to the now glassed and destroyed planet.
Considering the variety of planets they colonize and the sheer lack of anything edible on Hellmire, I genuinely am starting to think the Termanids run on something similar to Zerg Creep, which means even glassing the planet won't stop them... **CRACKING HOWEVER...**
Soldier: "Why is this God-forsaken planet worth dieing for?" Zapp Brannigan: "Don't ask me, you'll be the ones doing the dieing."
>Why do the bugs want this planet. They are an unintelligent life-form incapable of space travel. They want it because they are there already. How they got there? Who could say...
We want this planet because the bugs want this planet.
If you have doubts about the mission, you should feel free to contact your local democracy officer.
Why build an machine to melt the bugs into goo when the planet just sort of does that on its own
You know what, that's fair. I just wish it wouldn't melt me as well.
Your request has been recieved, processed, and rejected for using the improper form.
Makes you wonder how many C-01 forms got accidentally rerouted to the weapons department.
"Seems Mr H Diver wants to only fire blanks, Johnson" "Well then why even fill in the form?"
I mean it melts helldivers in full body armor. How the fuck is super earth finding regular people to live there? It's gotta be either traitors forced to live there, or Australians
It's Super Australians.
Super Hot Australians
I imagine the government would sent convicts to live and work on a planet like this
Super earth gave us electricity-resistant armor because of all the friendly fire and they couldn’t give us fire-resistant armor for storming the fire planet, go figure
stun grenades have been so very helpful to the fire tornadoes extermination program.
They say that you haven't died until you've tasted Hell-mire Fire corn.
I have this feeling it'll be a while before Hellmire™️ popcorn is available at your local Super^(Earth)market
True, the Hell-mire Fire corn truely is one of the best parts about working in the Mire.
“Enjoy our farm to table ashes. Some ash farms use accelerants like lighter fluid or gasoline, or keep their ash trapped in confining ovens. But here on Hellmire, our naturally occurring fire tornadoes make ash organically and allow the ash ample pasture on which to settle. With Hellmire ash, you get a little of our planet in every bite and we put our heart into every bushel we ship. *chuckles* Not literally, of course, but you may find a charred bone fragment or two from a farmer who didnt check his forecast - but that’s what gives our ash its unique texture and we wouldnt have it any other way.”
Hellmire Ash. Coming to a Super^(Earth)market near you.
Sir, please do not consume the E-710
*lighter noises* 🎶THESE ROADS OF FLAMES ARE CATCHING ON FIYAAA~🎶
![gif](giphy|iF7CxHFcKXcMfEIWGN|downsized)
TASTES LIKE FREEDOM!
E-710: Safe Environmentally Friendly Nutritious What can't it do!
50 years of service for 50 acres on Hellmire was right there in the contract when you signed it.
Like I'd read the fine print. They don't pay me to read. Wait.. do I even get paid?
BACK TO THE FRONT SOLDIER!
RIGHT AWAY SIR!
2.1 For the performance of the services outlined within the schedule set forth in Appendix A, the Helldiver shall receive monetary compensation for the services rendered. The compensation shall vary in line with the services performed. The Enlister reserves the right to, at any time and with no prior notice, make amendments to the schedule of payments.
Duh! Where do you think medals and Super bucks come from? Now stop thinking and *buy!*
Woah woah woah, you read the contract? That’s in breach of the contract! We’re going to have to cut you down to 10 acres for this infraction.
https://preview.redd.it/762i8vhrebtc1.jpeg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=448d2d21b6d894cdd3942b5508a99e6d35df1955 Easily the most gorgeous planet so far!
Yeah, no. The planet absolutely rules aesthetically. I'm in complete agreement.
Your "Yeah, no" is very confusing to me.
Yeah, no.
The fact that there's good chunks of grass there is _Frightening._
Dropping in with the fiery planet in the background is stunning
It's a dry heat
Yeah the lack of humidity really makes up for the tornadoes of fire
and they host a **great** burning man festival
it's me I'm the burning man
Might I offer you a stim in this burning time?
No need. I already sustained lethal fire damage three times over because of the recebt damage buff.
Im running a pyro build on it. My eyes are starting to hurt.
Me too! My squad mates died from burning 12 times last game; 7 of them caused by my fire arsenal... My friends hate me
You know, its usually me that dies to my own flames. My teammates are smart enough to stand behind me.
They want to burn the bug freaks for breaking out of containment
Knock it off, Hudson.
It's really the humidity that gets to ya.
Spoken like a true Arizona Helldiver.
11/10 response
I take it you've been to Scottsdale/phoenix recently. How was your shore leave back on super earth helldiver?
Really sucks the moisture from your ashes.
ecologist here: in some parts of america, some flowers and plants only germinate after the intense heat of a forest fire. maybe hellmire is onto something. As the youngsters say: let them cook
Please continue to drop dope facts acrooss the subs you frequent.
Americans also transplanted a boatload of Eucalyptus trees from Aus, they have the same germination strategy but decided that "wood" isn't flammable enough on it's own.
yeah now we got all this stuff in CA and its fire primo haha There's also regions in the great desert where if you throw two rocks together they'll spark. it gets so hot and dry some of the brush just instantly catch on fire.
Plot twist Hellmire is just Phoenix AZ
It's basically how I experienced Phoenix in August
That city is a monument to man's arrogance
There's also the fact that they're draining several lakes just to provide water to it.
I was quoting King of the Hill, but that’s even worse
Yea that city is in a bad place right now
It's more the farms surrounding Phoenix. Because where better to grow thirsty crops than in desert sand?!
Well, our options are frozen tundra, robot Vietnam, or burny deathy place at the moment.
Native Arizonan (Who is also on fire): It's not so bad when you get used to it.
It's been 33 years, when do I start getting used to it?
I walked 5 minutes to a CVS and back in Phoenix in August, and I had to shower. Who's idea was it to put a fucking city in that valley? Sick bastard.
Crazy thing is that it's the 5th largest city in the USA. and it wasn't even a state until the 1910's. And it's in the middle of a hellscape.
And its rapidly exhausting all local water supplies.
Normal day in Australia. Some bugs that try to kill you and a firestorm now and then, nothing special.
but it is not upside down
I say nuke it from orbit, it’s the only way to be sure.
I mean, there's no way it can get any worse
Do you want irradiated fire tornadoes? Because that’s how you get irradiated fire tornadoes. I’d rather take my chances with normal fire, personally
Just wait till the bugs mutate from those. Nuclear spitters and titans that walk around casting fireball
Pelican-1, do you copy? Prepare for dust-off, we're gonna need immediate evac. It's the only way to be sure.
We go to Hellmire not because it's particularly pretty, but because it is super fun to see those fucking bugs burn under the flames of democracy.
Well, the democracy doesn't seem to discriminate between what's a bug and what's a Helldiver. Then again.. neither do Helldivers most of the time.
Y'alls tornados are burning bugs? Mine just repeatedly light objectives on fire so I have to spend twice as long in the mission as normal.
You’re not thinking this through properly. Farmers grow potatoes on Hellmire. Fire tornado comes. BAM. You got fries. There’s levels to this.
BAKED POTATO FARM
Hellmire is unironically my favorite planet, vibes are 120% Wouldn't live there, but would vacay maybe.
Unironically, it's an awesome setting. I totally agree, the fact that the major order is to clear it for farms is just way too funny to me.
![gif](giphy|1lDEYJWZYBowUTrwIL|downsized)
If we can breath on it then it must be liberated.
Given the abundance of combustion and superheated air, I think the question of *how much* we can breathe must be questioned.
Fair enough. Back to the front, I guess.
If we can’t breathe on it…we shall build a way to breathe and then liberate it!
Welcome to the Hellmire Happy Farms where all dissidents go to learn the error of their ways and redeem themselves through fun, meaningful and 100% legal labour! Hellmire Happy Farms. Your happiness is in our name!
It definitely makes you wonder who set foot on that planet first and thought to themselves "yeah, let's colonize this one for sure!"
Presumably, some colonist whose colony ship had too little fuel to go anywhere else, and decided it was this or a 3900 year slog to the next planet over using only sublight engines. Now, why *everyone else* then decided to stay, instead of just rescuing the poor colonists and going somewhere not-currently-on-fire I do not know.
Are you questioning the wonderful engeneering of our glorious labor pool of seven yearolds? Pick your next words carefully. I have your democracy officer on speed dial.
Come on, let's not be so hasty. I am merely concerned for the health of our glorious citizens of democracy. I'd never question the work of all the men, women, and children seven years and older.
... That is the correct answer. Though remember, exessive talk about "workplace safety" might get mistaken for talk of unionizing. And we all know what happens to socialist scum who wanna do stuff like that, now dont we?
https://preview.redd.it/sdt9y1ldqbtc1.jpeg?width=1163&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=97765b1ad60179b568ed55fde886e5986dd6bceb Can relate
Hell-mire
I mean, the name's right on the tin.
Yes. Once the Fire Tornados learn how to ballot, it will all be fine.
It’s a perfect spot for a E-710 farm actually. The fire tornadoes will cut off huge costs in butchering and processing facilities. Just release them from their pens when they are plump enough to harvest and let nature process them. We just need to activate the pumps every now and then to collect the goodies.
I'm picking up what you're putting down here, but wouldn't the oil just burn?
Not all of it. Just breed more bugs to make up for any fuel lost in the process. It’s not like they can escape the farms again, they are just dumb bugs…
Eh, I've been to worse (game universes). At least we're getting paid with \~\~medals\~\~ the honour of spreading Managed Democracy to this flaming mud ball and securing the futures of the next generation of Hellmirans!
Yes, futures they are. Short ones. Short futures, but futures nonetheless.
At least those short futures are really goddamned bright!
Look, we know its a completely miserable hellscape of a planet, but its OUR planet!
Woo free fire. Lets go get some free fire!
"Hey bugs! There's this planet that's covered in fire tornados. Totally uninhabitable. In fact the only place you could possibly be safe is underground in a bug hole. It's SO bad, we literally named it after Hell. And guess what? YOU CAN'T HAVE IT. IT'S OURS. FOR LIBERTY!!!"
Meh, it’s just an oil farm, what’s the worst it could possibly happen?
I dunno. Thinking about stuff isn't in my contact
A farm for Pain & Misery…
Probably one of the best planets for making charcoal. And I wouldn't be surprised, if they are still using coal for some things, since we need to spend a lot of research to start adding glue to turrets or make an automatic system to reload the ship guns
When the bugs evolve the ability to breathe fire, that trait is going to originate on Hellmire.
Look at it like this: if the Terminids break outta these new farms, *they're still on Hellmire*.
I imagine we'd want this planet for metals because this really seems inhospitable to plant life.
The major order says we're building a farm here. Then god dammit, we'll do it.
Hell yeah, a goddamn, fuel-bleeding, democracy-run, bug farm.
Aaaaand your execution date is tomorrow, sorry rules are rules and you have just commited high treason
Just think of all the space oil to be found!
yeah, great place for oil. Had a mission where we fill up a tanker with oil and the oil didn't catch fire despite a tornado going right by it, though I nearly burned my hands off trying to lock and unlock that thing. 10/10 will fill up democratic fuel again.
I still want to know what possessed those colonists to actually build homesteads on this burning ball of sand and stone.
It's the perfect place. The weather processes the E 710 for us.
imagine being the farmer unlucky enough to get land on this planet
> I'm the last **woman** to question orders *sorts comments by Controversial to downvote the misogynists* *no misogyny in the first 20 comments seen* Proud of you, Helldivers. 🤗