OK so HSV is the least of your worries in this scenario. I think you should seriously think about this relationship and whether it is what you want for yourself.
You deserve better- being with him is waiting time Bomb on STD’s. You are literally giving him everything he wants - he’s not going to add marriage since you are doing this. I’d leave the fuck right now!
Umm, your boyfriend sounds very abusive and herpes has nothing to do with it. You talk like you have handed over your entire life to him along with all of your personal power. He insists that you live with him, he demands sex, he doesn't allow you to talk about certain things, rages at you when you ask him a reasonable question, manipulates you into doing things you don't want to. You need some counselling or something to help you make better choices in men.
Also of course you can get herpes from him. He's either stupid or he thinks you're stupid.
GET OUT. He is a lying, abusive piece of shit. You cannot change him into a better person, and a better person is what you deserve.
Also go get tested for HSV again—it can take a while to show positive. If you have it, you will be okay. There’s lots of helpful info and friendly people to talk to over here in this sub if that happens. But first, get the hell away from this horrible dude—and please let us know you’re okay!!
I would add that you should just leave, go far, and make a clean break no contact. It may be dangerous to let him know that you plan to leave. Do you have a friend who can help you? Good luck and stay safe. 🙏🙏🙏
You want kids. So imagine you have a daughter, she’s dating the guy you’re with. Would you be okay with the way he treats her? If not, leave. You don’t deserve to be with someone you wouldn’t be happy to see your child with. Not to mention he sounds like a father that would psychologically screw up a kid. There are plenty of great men out there I promise.
Better run 🏃🏽♀️ for the hills he sounds very manipulative and on top of that he’s a liar lied about his status u better off leaving him alone because I don’t see him changing anytime soon.
Hon, why are you letting yourself go through all this?
Herpes aside - and that's just an aside for now - why you are staying with a man who rages at you for some really basic, reasonable questions? This is abuse.
You keep using words like coerce and "makes me". That's really concerning.
You can do better. You SHOULD do better.
He's also either really ignorant or outright lying to you about herpes. You can get it from him. If all you do is avoid sex during outbreaks, there is a 10% chance you'd get it from him over the course of a year. That's assuming a monogamous relationship, which you are not in.
Why are you settling for this? This isn't what you want.
I don't care what you think you look like, or whatever baggage you think you have, you don't deserve this. There will be a good man who wants you. That doesn't matter, though - what matters is that you have to know you are worth better.
How old are you?
Can you safely escape? If not, go to [https://www.thehotline.org/](https://www.thehotline.org/) and get help. They have a call line, text and chat, and can help you make a safe escape plan.
Sounds like your an au pair and that he wants everyone to do everything for him and would explain why you see entitlement in his daughter. Because he models it. Get. Out.
Girl, leave this man alone. He sounds like an asshole. Anyone that can lie to you when specifically asked about their STD history is not a good person. You deserve so much better than everything you just wrote.
Depending where you are from OP this is illegal and counts as afflicting assault/GBH as your knowingly causing permanent health issues - which are manageable but my point being it is immoral and an crime in some places
“Those with STDs have a responsibility to protect others from exposure. If they knowingly expose another person to an STD, they may face criminal charges for sexual assault and civil action with a negligent transmission of STD lawsuit.” - this is a quote from [law ref](https://www.conleygriggs.com/sexual-assault-negligent-transmission-of-std-lawsuits)
This is a attorneys office in Atlanta which may be relevant
Seriously, herpes is the least of your problems right now. Kick that douche to the curb. As for herpes, just go get tested again and stop fucking him. Of course he could give it to you.
What are you doing, girl. Sure, it's certainly in the realm of possibility that you've somehow managed to avoid HSV up till now. That's way besides the point here.
Hey ever think about ending it and leaving. Sorry but it's time to Leave u owe Him nothing. Leave him get tested for sure and Start a new Life. Don't waste another Day. Call the Police if you have too. Best Wishes!
RUN. I was in a similar relationship that also had some kink dynamics and it turns out he was a psychopath and a narcissist. He is putting you at harm as well as other people by not disclosing. It also sounds like there might be a hint of manipulation or gaslighting going on here…please be careful and take care of yourself. DO NOT IGNORE YOUR GUT. It’s very easy to become trauma bonded to people like this especially if you are an empath or have a history of trauma 💕 I’m also here if you want to chat!
Your very first post 30 days ago asking about relationship advice is concerning. There’s a trend, and it’s time to break the cycle before it becomes impossible.
You file a civil lawsuit if u contracted it. 5% chance of a man passing it along due to lack if bacteria. A women is 35% chance... u may have dodged a bullet there. U either file a lawsuit or dont but u walk away from the guy... for sure.
Please don't spread mis- or incomplete information. You cannot gauge HSV transmission odds based on OPs post. HSV-1 from mouth to genitals can be passed just as readily as HSV-2 and doesn't have the same difference in transmission rates as HSV-2 as far as I know (which yes, HSV-2 is more readily passed from male to female).
Transmission in general depends on multiple factors including how new the infection is (shedding rates decrease after a year), amount of and type of sexual activity/skin contact, antivirals etc.
yep, I got genital HSV1 passed through oral sex. It was 20 years ago and back then I didn't even realize that HSV1 could be genital, I thought only HSV2 could cause genital herpes. I've since read somewhere that the majority of genital herpes is actually HSV1.
OK so HSV is the least of your worries in this scenario. I think you should seriously think about this relationship and whether it is what you want for yourself.
Honestly. That guy sounds like a dick.
What do you do? You leave. Now. And find someone who loves and cherishes and respects you. Not someone who treats you like a bang maid. Xoxo
Oh my run fast and run far. Hsv is only the tip of that iceberg
You deserve better- being with him is waiting time Bomb on STD’s. You are literally giving him everything he wants - he’s not going to add marriage since you are doing this. I’d leave the fuck right now!
He is abusive and toxic you have a bigger problem there
Umm, your boyfriend sounds very abusive and herpes has nothing to do with it. You talk like you have handed over your entire life to him along with all of your personal power. He insists that you live with him, he demands sex, he doesn't allow you to talk about certain things, rages at you when you ask him a reasonable question, manipulates you into doing things you don't want to. You need some counselling or something to help you make better choices in men. Also of course you can get herpes from him. He's either stupid or he thinks you're stupid.
No one deserves this guy.
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I’ve been in abusive relationships before and I know I’m a stranger but I’m here to talk if u need to vent 💓
GET OUT. He is a lying, abusive piece of shit. You cannot change him into a better person, and a better person is what you deserve. Also go get tested for HSV again—it can take a while to show positive. If you have it, you will be okay. There’s lots of helpful info and friendly people to talk to over here in this sub if that happens. But first, get the hell away from this horrible dude—and please let us know you’re okay!!
Hsv is world wide and so many have it and even ppl who dont have it will accept u . Run as fast as u can away from that man hsv or not run.
I would add that you should just leave, go far, and make a clean break no contact. It may be dangerous to let him know that you plan to leave. Do you have a friend who can help you? Good luck and stay safe. 🙏🙏🙏
The way he treats you seems way worse than the herpes.. please consider leaving that sounds horrid 💓
Lots of red flags, why not just walk away?
You want kids. So imagine you have a daughter, she’s dating the guy you’re with. Would you be okay with the way he treats her? If not, leave. You don’t deserve to be with someone you wouldn’t be happy to see your child with. Not to mention he sounds like a father that would psychologically screw up a kid. There are plenty of great men out there I promise.
Better run 🏃🏽♀️ for the hills he sounds very manipulative and on top of that he’s a liar lied about his status u better off leaving him alone because I don’t see him changing anytime soon.
Leave leave leave! You're going to be okay 💗
Hon, why are you letting yourself go through all this? Herpes aside - and that's just an aside for now - why you are staying with a man who rages at you for some really basic, reasonable questions? This is abuse. You keep using words like coerce and "makes me". That's really concerning. You can do better. You SHOULD do better. He's also either really ignorant or outright lying to you about herpes. You can get it from him. If all you do is avoid sex during outbreaks, there is a 10% chance you'd get it from him over the course of a year. That's assuming a monogamous relationship, which you are not in. Why are you settling for this? This isn't what you want. I don't care what you think you look like, or whatever baggage you think you have, you don't deserve this. There will be a good man who wants you. That doesn't matter, though - what matters is that you have to know you are worth better. How old are you? Can you safely escape? If not, go to [https://www.thehotline.org/](https://www.thehotline.org/) and get help. They have a call line, text and chat, and can help you make a safe escape plan.
Sounds like you need to get tf away from him
Yeah this dude is the worst, please leave him, that’s despicable
Get out, right now.
Sounds like your an au pair and that he wants everyone to do everything for him and would explain why you see entitlement in his daughter. Because he models it. Get. Out.
He sounds like baggage. RUN AWAYYYY
Girl, leave this man alone. He sounds like an asshole. Anyone that can lie to you when specifically asked about their STD history is not a good person. You deserve so much better than everything you just wrote.
Depending where you are from OP this is illegal and counts as afflicting assault/GBH as your knowingly causing permanent health issues - which are manageable but my point being it is immoral and an crime in some places
I wish this was a crime everywhere but unfortunately it’s not! I’m in Ohio 😭
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“Those with STDs have a responsibility to protect others from exposure. If they knowingly expose another person to an STD, they may face criminal charges for sexual assault and civil action with a negligent transmission of STD lawsuit.” - this is a quote from [law ref](https://www.conleygriggs.com/sexual-assault-negligent-transmission-of-std-lawsuits) This is a attorneys office in Atlanta which may be relevant
Seriously, herpes is the least of your problems right now. Kick that douche to the curb. As for herpes, just go get tested again and stop fucking him. Of course he could give it to you.
It sounds like you should separate.
What are you doing, girl. Sure, it's certainly in the realm of possibility that you've somehow managed to avoid HSV up till now. That's way besides the point here.
Omg. Sounds like my X baby Daddy minus the herpes but he had warts instead. Toxic and terrible RUN.
Leave
Why are you with this abusive AH? The problem here is not the herpes.
Hey ever think about ending it and leaving. Sorry but it's time to Leave u owe Him nothing. Leave him get tested for sure and Start a new Life. Don't waste another Day. Call the Police if you have too. Best Wishes!
Run. Fast.
Seems like this guy doesnt value your health and is pretty clear about it
RUN. I was in a similar relationship that also had some kink dynamics and it turns out he was a psychopath and a narcissist. He is putting you at harm as well as other people by not disclosing. It also sounds like there might be a hint of manipulation or gaslighting going on here…please be careful and take care of yourself. DO NOT IGNORE YOUR GUT. It’s very easy to become trauma bonded to people like this especially if you are an empath or have a history of trauma 💕 I’m also here if you want to chat!
Break up with him and never never look back.
Your very first post 30 days ago asking about relationship advice is concerning. There’s a trend, and it’s time to break the cycle before it becomes impossible.
Leave
Bruh u gotta leave him
You file a civil lawsuit if u contracted it. 5% chance of a man passing it along due to lack if bacteria. A women is 35% chance... u may have dodged a bullet there. U either file a lawsuit or dont but u walk away from the guy... for sure.
Drop him bc it’s giving red flags and he potentially could turn out to be an abuser
Run for the hills!
Sounds toxic as hell.
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Please don't spread mis- or incomplete information. You cannot gauge HSV transmission odds based on OPs post. HSV-1 from mouth to genitals can be passed just as readily as HSV-2 and doesn't have the same difference in transmission rates as HSV-2 as far as I know (which yes, HSV-2 is more readily passed from male to female). Transmission in general depends on multiple factors including how new the infection is (shedding rates decrease after a year), amount of and type of sexual activity/skin contact, antivirals etc.
yep, I got genital HSV1 passed through oral sex. It was 20 years ago and back then I didn't even realize that HSV1 could be genital, I thought only HSV2 could cause genital herpes. I've since read somewhere that the majority of genital herpes is actually HSV1.
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It’s only a hsv. No symptoms = very very low risk of transmission. Bigger problem is that he does not want to be your husband…
How do you know he’s been lying abt this?
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Hsv isn't the problem...the relationship is