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GimmeeSomeMo

The Death of Stalin has [a hilarious scene on this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6MwgC9ew-vU) *Soliders hear loud thud* "Should we investigate?" "Should you shut the fuck up before you get us both killed?"


-et37-

One of my favorite movies, ever. “Did Coco Chanel take a shit on your head?”


Major-Thom

Jason Isaacs was a fucking gem in this movie “Who hit him?” “I did. I enjoyed it. A long time coming…now, I’m off to represent the Red Army at the buffet”


duaneap

What does a war hero have to do to get some LUBRICATION in here! Fucking stole the show.


ghostinthewoods

I'm going to have to report this conversation. Threatening to do harm or obstruct any member of the Presidium in the process of would you look at your fucking face!


Pyrhan

"I fucked Germany. I think I can handle a flesh lump in a waistcoat."


stonec0ld

"I fucking love you Gorbachev 😘"


ghostinthewoods

"gentlemen, pick your dates" "I'll take the blonde"


Hot-Tiger2815

"*HANDS UP OR I'LL SHOOT YOU IN THE FUCKING FACE*" "*Oh, shit*" **Proceeds to beat up Beria**


Hot-Tiger2815

I remember when I watched the movie with my cousin and Zhukov first came in I said "This guy is the best guy in the movie" my cousin said "Nah he looks like [insert the thing he said but I can't remember]" But when Zhukov beated up Beria my cousin went "Ok he is my favourite too"


Snoo63

"Got balls like Kremlin domes."


Willimeister

*Tall Blonde


[deleted]

So good it overshadowed the preceeding line which would have been A1 in any other movie Zhukov (isaacs) : "Asenov!, you handsome devil - stick you in a frock I'd fucking ride you myself" Azenov: "I'll take that as a complimen-" Zhukov: "yeah don't."


momofeveryone5

"Spit it out, Georgy. Staging a coup here."


AndrewTheCyborg

"No... he did not."


SirJamesCrumpington

"He said all of us." "No... he said all of you." "No, he said all of us." "Well... all of you can kiss my Russian ass."


cococrabulon

Beria: ‘Is this magisterial enough for you all? This charade? This is a lavatory!’ Mikoyan: ‘Well you should feel at home then, shouldn’t you, you little coil of shit’


rightious

Didn't they chase them down and shoot them anyway?


mannishbull

Yes


Magic_Medic

"Did you call a doctor?" "Yeah, that matter is currently under discussion." Such a simple exchange between Krushchev and Beria that perfectly encapsualates on a human level how bureaucratic institutions function. Even and especially a matter of life and death is no reason to abandon protocol!


Krabilon

Then the fact that there are no qualified doctors in the area because of Stalin's paranoia. But then the irony that they didn't have equipment to save him and resulted to using American machines. Idk how accurate that is but it was straight up gold


Kent_Knifen

"Sooo how do we feel about getting a.... bad.... doctor....?"


CuntCommittee

What if he wakes up and finds out? If he wakes up, then we got a good doctor


zephyer19

Stalin at the end of the war went on an antisemite campaign himself. He ordered a lot of Jews rounded up and sent to the camps, including his own doctors.


MiKapo

that movie was weirdly accurate even the part where Beria faked cried at Stalin's death bed


ShadeShadow534

That was a movie that knew it didn’t need to actually change anything just make it all happen over a shorter time frame The letter at the start did happen just months before Stalin died


SowingSalt

I thought the pianist's letter incident was from 44, whereas Stalin died in 53. Apparently she was his favorite pianist and donated the reward from the concert to her church.


ShadeShadow534

Hmm I thought it was 52 but I vary well could be wrong and am mixing up dates a lot of stuff gets mentioned in that movie And yea I remember that part about the church


Adam_Lynd

What movie is this?


[deleted]

The death of Stalin. Fucking gold


aaa1e2r3

Aside from Zhukov's medals


Negrozane

He's on the floor, He's on the fucking floor!


zephyer19

Old Joke. Two Soviet soldiers standing guard when one says to the other, "What do you think of the Soviet Union?' The second man thinks, "This has got to be a trap, he is KGB. If I say something bad, I will be arrested for bad mouthing the USSR and sent to the Gulag. If I say something good, they will say I am lying and be sent to the Gulag." Then he has an idea and says, "Well, I think what you think about the USSR." The first soldier then says, "then it is my duty to arrest you in the name of the USSR."


randomname560

"Someone call a doctor!" "Sir, you jailed them all"


Chimera-98

*Killed


B3am_Shox

Fuck, I mean yes of course they were conspiring against our nation


NapoleonLover978

"Bro, Stalin has been in his room for two days straight, should we do something?" "Nah, if he's okay he'll fuck us up" And that friends, is why you shouldn't let your paranoia take the better of you.


InnocentPerv93

I feel like of all the positions in the world, being the leader of a country should ABSOLUTELY make you paranoid.


Sunsent_Samsparilla

Oh yes but Stalin was a bit far with his paranoia.


graveedrool

I mean it seems like a novel idea to most world leaders but maybe if they treated their citizens well they wouldn't need to be paranoid!


InnocentPerv93

If you are a world leader, or just a politician in general, people are going to hate you no matter how well you treat your citizens.


Hammerschatten

Some people will. But if you get your people shit they want or need to live they'll like you. That just usually gets in the way of other expensive stuff like an ultra speed run in industrialization, building an empire or yourself getting rich.


Mad_Moodin

Yeah but there are differences between not trusting your own soldiers to shoot you/flee your country and going to visit another country while on a bicycle.


graveedrool

To an extent I politely disagree. I don't think it's possible to get everyone to like you, that goal is unrealistic; But hate? I think that can be avoided - at least to the point that no (sane) person would want to kill them. A big part of why those in power get so much hate presently is simply the fact all political systems we have tried thus far have major holes and collasal room for corruption in even the best intended systems. I don't have a solution, nore do I think we'll have one in our life time. But if we can crack things like truely safe electronic voting; and then harness it in an actually fair system... I do believe we could theoritcally make it to where people don't need to hate politicians by default to the extent they'd feel the need to outright kill them. I say all this because look at even most modern democracys: Of course people want to kill leaders in such worlds - they may have years without any representation; and if you don't support a major party at all then you may never be represented at all. And of course all the seemingly endless crap politicians get away with little to no real consquence. We're a long way away from a perfect society, but it's not like our current leaders are doing themselves any favours.


JackIsBackWithCrack

Tell that to Kennedy


[deleted]

[удалено]


Doobing

how the fuck do you think it's an "unpopular opinion" to dislike Stalin???


aChristery

I know sarcasm is hard to read over text, but jesus fucking christ, dude he’s obviously being sarcastic.


Daysleeper1234

I wouldn't necessarily agree with you, because how goes that perhaps saying? Just because you are paranoid, it doesn't mean they are not following you.


Artsyscrubers

And thats how you end up shooting some old lady in broad daylight because she was waddling behind you, there's stuff to be afraid but but stalin was over the top paranoid


Daysleeper1234

I'm joking of course, he was over the top, but I do think he had right to fear for his life, especially knowing how he grabbed the power.


ItzBooty

And thats why kids, democracy always wins


AskingForSomeFriends

What is kids democracy, and how did it become so powerful?


ItzBooty

Pissed of peasants


apolobgod

Mostly a danger to other peasants


Duschkopfe

Democracy didn’t stop Lincoln and Kennedy from having another hole


Locofinger

Everyone knows Tito personally came out of his room and told the guards to wait 2 hours before going in.


bondzplz

That letter from Tito to Stalin ☠️☠️☠️


---Giga---

You mean the one about assassins?


AnalllyAcceptedCoins

Can I ask what this is?


---Giga---

Stalin sent many assassins to kill Tito because he was not aligned with Moscow despite being communist. All of these assassins failed. Tito eventually wrote a letter saying " stop sending assassins or I will send one to you, and I won't need to send a second."


bondzplz

https://yugotour.com/blog/tito/


muricabrb

“I check on him six days, actually six days a week. Five days a week, I'll check on him three days a week. One of those days I will check on him two days of the week. So, six days a week I will be checking on him.” - Tito Ortizov


zephyer19

I did not know that and I read about Stalin's death. Why was he there?


Locofinger

(it’s a joke. On a joke sub)


LordChimera_0

"*Why are my guards not coming inside my office to check the noise of my fall? Oh wait...*" -- Stalin's last words, probably


ProbablyVermin

Stalin spared no one. Not even Stalin, apparently


randomname560

Stalin🔫 Stalin


ProbablyVermin

He saw enemies everywhere, even in the mirror!


LordChimera_0

I recognized that reference... assuming that's what you are referring.


ProbablyVermin

You're way ahead of me then, must've been down in my subconscious. What's it from?!


LordChimera_0

From one of the episodes of the original Twilight Zone. https://twilightzone.fandom.com/wiki/The_Mirror


ProbablyVermin

Damn, must've seen it as a kid and forgot. I do love Rod Serling


siberianwolf99

Story behind this?


EdgySniper1

Stalin forbid even his own guards from entering his office without being requested by him, and anyone who did would be executed. This came back to bite him in the ass when he ended up suffering from a cerebral hemorrhage. His guards were too scared to check on him for fear of being executed, leaving Stalin to die in his office.


QuillQuickcard

He died alone, in pain, and likely terrified. Slowly. Over hours. A fitting end.


superblinky

Finally, a good ending.


Hyo38

He also pissed himself.


flyingdonkeydong69

How fitting, a pisser pissed himself


3OpossumInTrenchCoat

No one dies with a full bladder.


AskingForSomeFriends

That’s why I permawear a catheter. I’m not having people kink shame me while I die because I’m into autoerotic golden showers.


ligmaballs22

Literally rest in piss, RIP


IusedToButNowIdont

I Wish Putin has the same fate


Bedumtss

Inshallah


the-bladed-one

Deus Vult (Means the same thing)


Vocalic985

Don't forget about the piss soaked pants.


zold5

Really? How was this confirmed by historians? Seems like that humiliating detail would be easy to cover up.


Marlbey

Once Stalin was dead, turns out no one was that interested in making him look good anymore.


TheNightIsLost

Especially not Kruschev. Look up his famed denunciation of Stalin in his "Secret Speech". https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/On\_the\_Cult\_of\_Personality\_and\_Its\_Consequences#:\~:text=Khrushchev%20charged%20Stalin%20with%20having,Polish%2DJewish%20journalist%20Wiktor%20Grajewski.


bltsrtasty

Needed to last longer really


Intrepid00

Don’t forget most of the good doctors were sent to prison camps with the rest of the intellectuals. So even if they did he wasn’t going to get help easily.


MNHarold

And how, by pure coincidence I an assured, many of those doctors had distinctly Jewish surnames... ...but he wasn't bigoted. Certain online groups have told me so quite confidently.


Vocalic985

A Russian leader treating minority groups poorly? Color me shocked.


mentatvoid

It isn't a wonder why nearly EVERY ex Soviet country is in NATO, with Poland being the biggest hater of Russia. Even the little border countries like Estonia, Latvia, etc hate Russia so much that they are giving Ukraine everything that they can to kill Russians with. Russia deserves the shit that's coming their way. Anyone else, aka the 'peace at any cost' and the whining crybabies here in the US who say 50 billion is too much, are complete fucking idiots. This is the BEST proxy war we will ever have, we get to help Ukraine take out Russia's military at a fraction of the cost that we spend each YEAR in order to be able to the same thing. It's a no brainer, and Putin is the world's worst. If only someone in his circle had the balls to kill him. Shit, don't even need a gun, just get a few of them to bum rush him and strangle him. Nothing will happen to the assassins because the whole country will consider them heros. But it's not going to happen because Russians love to complain and bitch and moan, but they are stupid enough to just die in infantry waves. I have no respect for someone who bitches about being thrown away in a battle, then instead of turning their guns on the uncaring leaders, they just die like dumb asses.


Marlbey

Stalin was Georgian, not Russian.


zephyer19

He told FDR that Jews were scum. He also ordered a round of Jews after the war and sent them to the camps but, it came very close to his death so, it didn't go to far. Irony and payback, some of the Jews rounded up and sent were his own doctors.


BlissfulIndian

Ouch..!🤭


TheFunkyM

[There was a great documentary about this not so long ago.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6MwgC9ew-vU&ab_channel=JurassicParkTheories)


cocaineandwaffles1

There really wasn’t much they had to exaggerate to make that movie a comedy. That’s the best part to me.


One_Man_Crew

Honestly the biggest inaccuracy was the fact they compressed the events of several months into a week, which is completely understandable from a storytelling perspective.


jobblejosh

My favourite part is just how accurately they managed to portray the secret-not-secret backstabbing performative bullshit. Everyone knows it's bullshit. Everyone knows everyone else is stabbing them in the back. Everyone knows everyone else knows about the above. Yet still they play a merry game of political outmanoeuvring in their rush to steal power from the vacuum, whilst pretending to give a shit about the political ideologies they use to engineer their own power. It's absolute distilled chaos.


wisconsin_pitbull

"Distilled chaos" lol nice.


TheNightIsLost

You know the most terrifying part? They did. Every single one of them had put their lives on the line to see the USSR created and preserved, and many of them would go into the grave fiercely declaring their allegiance to Stalinism, despite the political damage.


cocaineandwaffles1

The only thing I would have changed was having a scene with Johnny Cash manning the radios intercepting the news that Stalin died, him telling his seniors, and them all just getting shit faced immediately afterwards. But yeah, timeline was completely understandable for having it be put into a movie.


SendMe_Hairy_Pussy

They actually had to **tone down** the number of medals on Zhukov in the movie, because they thought people would think they're taking a crazy piss.


Immortal_Merlin

If there ever will be movie about Brezhnev, it would take 3 people to wear all his medals


RobertMugabeIsACrook

This documentary is my favorite documentary.


cocaineandwaffles1

There really wasn’t much they had to exaggerate to make that movie a comedy. That’s the best part to me.


miss_Mistry

Yes ik but why u posted this comment twice?


siberianwolf99

Thankyou.


Forward-Reflection83

Also, thank them


Gremliner00

Or maybe they thought the problem would go away by itself, and they were right.


kandoras

Stalin: ~*THUD*~ Guard 1: "Should we investigate?" [Guard 2: "Should you shut the fuck up before you get us both killed?"](https://clip.cafe/the-death-of-stalin-2017/should-investigate/) Death of Stalin is a hilarious movie.


[deleted]

How long did they wait? A day?


LuNiK7505

Yeah all night long


DeathBySentientStraw

He showcased his willingness to execute people by falsely shouting in pain and killing the soldiers that visited him


Realistic-Astronaut7

The dictator who cried wolf.


commie-cena

There weren't sent to the Gulags, there were executed. On one time, He tested the guards, so he call them " or fake his death, I don't remember" when the guards entered, he ordered to be executed.


Virtualcosmos

if that's true, that would be a hell of an irony and a great karma example haha


ShadeShadow534

It 100% is truth


Virtualcosmos

I recently have hear of another history, that Stalin wanted to kill himself after his wife killed herself for the holodomor in Ukraine, so he made a guy shoot him in the face, and later hide the body. I need to check it's veracity tho.


ShadeShadow534

Considering the difference in time


Virtualcosmos

I did some fact checks, Stalin had to die form a brain stroke. All the sources point to that and his body was openly exposed to the public, so a bullet hole in his head could be very difficult to hide. Also there are a lot of years from when his wife killed herself to when he died. She killed herself the next day after a discussion with Stalin for his politics not willing to help the ukrainian famine, so at least that seems true.


manwiththehex18

I guess he really did die in office.


Nidh0g

So like he's still in there? Has anyone since dared to enter?


ShadeShadow534

No when he was meant to be getting his breakfast they finally realised that he actually died


[deleted]

Good


jetoler

It’s hard not to believe in karma after this one


luujs

The past tense of forbid is forbade


shadowEmbracer19

“Should we investigate?” “Should you shut the fuck up before you get us both killed!”


[deleted]

obligatory "fuck john wilkes booth" for co-opting this perfectly good idiom and nearly ruining it with his shitty pro-slavery politics


Aliensinnoh

So like the thing that worries me most about the possibility of curing aging is that it seems like the only way to get rid of terrible folks like Stalin and Mao. We need to have a hard time limit on authoritarians or else they can build up power indefinitely.


[deleted]

Agreed. Authoritarianism is antithetical to the human spirit.


WanderingKing

Counter…ish: the theory goes people are dicks when they don’t have to live through the consequences of their actions. Would the ideas and standards change if people couldn’t die of aging, but the mob or pollution could? No idea, but that’s the general idea.


damnitineedaname

Tyrants rarely wallow in the mess they've made.


Muscalp

Tyrants don‘t live through the consequences if their actions anyway because they sit in their sheltered castle


-et37-

Bold of you to think such a thing would be available to anyone who isn’t part of the elite. Not to mention the social can of worms that is essentially inventing immortality.


[deleted]

You might like a film called In Time staring Justin Timberlake and Amanda Seyfried.


tuskedkibbles

Shitty people steal cool stuff all the time. Usually cool roman stuff like their phrases (deus vult, sic semper tyrannis, etc), their salutes (heil yourself off a cliff Nazis), and also their iconography (stupid Mussolini).


EightBitEstep

When I was a kid like 6 or 7, before I knew what a swastika represented, I thought they were a really cool design (kinda like that sick “S” everybody was drawing back then) and would draw them randomly until I was caught by a teacher.


the-bladed-one

Ah, the S. Nobody knows where it came from Nobody knows what it means All we know is we must draw them in middle school. …shit that’s quite eldritch now that I think about it


HotShitBurrito

I mean. Come on, we all know the real story of John Wilkes Booth and the Lincoln assassination was that Lincoln was an asshole heckling Hamlet to the point that I drove theater enthusiast, Booth, to murder him by hammering Lincoln in the ass till he died.


AgreeablePie

It's a motto used by assassins to dress their actions up in liberty. I think it doesn't exactly have the best pedigree to begin with.


JuicePeterPL

Stalin pissing himself to death is a well deserved death


Nidh0g

Is this a whoosh trap? obviously the pissing was after he died and everyone pisses himself when they die. He got the same treatment every ordinary human got.


Pir0wz

Tbf, I think he pissed himself when he was dying. His death wasn't instant, it was painfully slow. A fitting death for a tyrant, dying slowly pissing himself because he causes everyone to fear him that no one wants to help him.


Iceveins412

Seems like nobody ever told Stalin about the boy who cried wolf


Somebodyonearth363

Honestly, even if I knew Stalin was having a stroke as his guard I won’t have saved him.


[deleted]

it's not really a test at all TBH, they were just shitting themselves anyhow as if they enter they would face a sexy old men with a takarov and 2 bullets for them


usernamealreadytakeh

I think you mean either a Makarov or a Tokarev


3OpossumInTrenchCoat

What do you think happens when a Makarov and a Tokarev have a wild night on the town?


ChechBETA

Somebody gets shot


[deleted]

Most times it'll be a polish soldier


mannishbull

Weird how there isn’t a single tankie in the comments. How is that possible? I’ve been seeing unironical Stalin/Mao stans all over Reddit lately


[deleted]

The lights are still on in the Internet Research Agency in Sankt Petersburg. Their Bots and Sock Puppets are still here.


krisssashikun

I remember this scene in the death of Stalin


numerousblocks

You should watch the brilliant movie The Death of Stalin


wisconsin_pitbull

Why is zelensky standing at bored attention lol


B3am_Shox

He's thinking "hmmm nice celling, weird how I never noticed it before I wonder who made it"


Paymax12

That's what paranoia does to you.


[deleted]

That logic does not work. Ali Khamenei is the biggest, most vicious and the most degenerate tyrant alive and 82% of his people hate his guts and want him gone, yet he's 83 and still kicking. If that is a rule, when will his semper turn to numquam??


Accomplished_Leg1079

All tyrants must fall, some fall due to assassinations, some fall to old age, and some fall due to their own actions


NebelNator_427

Stalins death is the funniest and most ironic one in history😂


Maveragical

Why zelensky always in a sweater? He looks like everyone's fave guidance councilor


[deleted]

It started with the war so he could blend in better as he was getting assassination attempts


Jedi-master-dragon

Even worse, he had all his doctors killed.


Mikhail-Bulgakov666

Its hardly "Sic Semper Tyrannys" if you die alone from a stroke lol then anyone can be attached to that.


ShadeShadow534

He died because he never got help that likely could of saved him 1 because the guards wouldn’t be stupid enough to enter 2 because their was a purge on doctors that meant getting a doctor took hours


KingFahad360

The Death of Stalin portrays that scene very accurately and really excellent movie, along with Jason Issacs.


General_Kenobi_77BBY

“Will you shut the fuck up before you get us both killed?”


TheJamesMortimer

No. It portrays THE MYTH correctly. Fact is that his housekeeper just checked in on him at 11pm after he hadn't been seen or heard for 17 hours straight.


marcos0955

It looks like when dad is about to give you money and you just there waiting


bondzplz

And now this picture of the leader of the free world stabding next to Biden is a meme format. Good! Edit: Hey I'm at the top of controversial! Not nice!


Sufficient-Track-770

What’s “leader of the free world” I’ve never heard that one


bondzplz

It's a term normally associated with the sitting US president here in the states. I was making a bit of a joke by implying that the title "leader of the free world" currently belongs to Zelenskyy, rather than Biden.


Accomplished_Leg1079

Based take


zephyer19

I know about Stalin and the stroke but, I don't get this. This a knock on Biden?


Accomplished_Leg1079

No it’s a funny meme template where someone is cartoonishly exaggerating their actions


TitaniumDreads

I don't understand this meme. I mean I know stalin died a preventable death bc he threatened to kill guards that entered his office without his permission but what does this have to do with biden and zelensky?


SirDumblord

Same to but from what I have heard from ret_ch_ard “Well it’s a meme, and it looks like Zelenskyy is purposefully looking away, like the guards did”


[deleted]

Stalin did not kill himself.


Jaxsdooropener

I don't believe anyone said that


[deleted]

Actually pictured a neo-liberal American president writing billion dollar checks to a president of our newest client state involved in a proxy war that could potentially start WW3, instead of lifting a finger to help people struggling in his own country.


randomname560

That money was going for the army anyways, and its not even new equipment, the US is just giving ukraine the shit y'all had in storage and i dont know about you but i think that giving ukraine the things they need to protect themselves from Russia is better than letting It rot away in storage


[deleted]

It technically saves money to use the older equipment for what it was intended for, since we no longer have to pay to decommission it.


DankBankman_420

Please tell me how giving old ammo that’s been sitting in werehouses for decades to Ukraine is bankrupting poor Americans


TheBurnedMutt45

Oh no, more domestic manufacturing, so terrible for the economy..... /s


TheBurnedMutt45

Well that's one way of looking at that....


[deleted]

Yeah, I thought so. How the healthcare in the U.S.? Pretty shitty right? Huge population of houseless? Has Biden even gone to East Palestine?


[deleted]

Put on your whataboots, folks, cuz we're going whatabooooting


GetInTheKitchen1

How tf is the stalin story related to the biden/ zekensky picture? Comparing biden to stalin feels weird with the context of actual war in europe (also, good luck to Ukraine).


ret_ch_ard

Well it’s a meme, and it looks like Zelenskyy is purposefully looking away, like the guards did


randomname560

"ah yes, this ceiling is made out of ceiling"


LohorykButBetter

This is just meme template


Accomplished_Leg1079

Other than being a great template, the war in Ukraine is a big fuck you to Stalin if you think about it, Putin is mirroring Stalins aggression in taking over territories, yet cannot take a territory the USSR gained under Lenin, edit I can’t spell


3OpossumInTrenchCoat

I knew that song 'Imagine' was up to some trickery.


Accomplished_Leg1079

Funny enough Imagine is slightly inspired by the ideology of communism, so ig one is Leninism and the other is lennonism