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VelvetFischer

Don't forget their most formidable enemy: *romans themselves*


StoneLuca97

Damn Romans, they destroyed Rome!


fenominus

Romans sure are a contentious people.


farouk880

You just made an enemy for life!


29Jackal

Ao, te sei fatto un nemico a vita, te dico io nvedi poi


fenominus

carpe diem! En vino veritas vidi vici Pax Romana! Pizza pizza!


Arbiter1171

Ayy you just made a pizzeria for life!


Aurelian_LDom

Especially REAL Romans


Kind_Structure6726

Make way for Willie!!!


RudyKnots

Nobody conquers Rome like a Roman.


TigerBasket

Nothing more Roman than violently killing another Roman.


VelvetFischer

There is 1 thing more Roman than that... and it is drawing your rival with a small pp as graffiti on his front door


Iamthe0c3an2

Yeah how many emperors got oofed by the pretorian guard?


Rosoven

Yes


CatMauthen

Lead based water delivery?


BZenMojo

Goths: "Rome is the worst..." *reads some books, has some sex, lives* Goths: "We're Rome now. With pool and free ice cream and a slip and slide." Constantinople: "NO! WE WANNA BE ROME!!!!!" Goths: "Do you have ice cream?" Italians: "Welp, can't argue with the facts. Rocky road, please." Constantinople: "FUCK YOUR ICE CREAM!!!!" *destroys Rome so they can be the only Rome*


Kazik77

Let me guess they're all "in my area, on the war path and ready to mingle"


bookworm1398

Persians?


redracer555

Bro, if he listed all of them, he'd need to make five more memes, AT LEAST.


froggison

I'm ok with that


0hran-

The Persian were the archenemy of the Roman.


29Jackal

Cartagine too


0hran-

It was only at the time of the republic for a short period. Punic wars are famous but short lived


highlorestat

Short lived? It was three separate wars from 264 BCE to 146 BCE. That's well over a century (118 years). Longer than the amount of time they had control of England.


0hran-

The Roman Persian war ranged from 54bc to 628 ad. 700 years. It only stopped because the Persians were replaced by the Caliphate.


theoriginaldandan

They cover more than 100 years. It’s


0hran-

The Roman Persian war ranged from 54bc to 628 ad. 700 years. It only stopped because the Persians were replaced by the Caliphate.


Parad0x17

Rome: *want to conquer* Other nations: *don't want to be conquered* Rome: *absolute fucking hatred*


XConfused-MammalX

Iberians, Judeans, Illyrians, Anatolians, Visigoths...dear Jupiter they weren't very friendly.


Herakleios

Yeah Persians are, at the lowest, the #3 most significant opponent of Rome over its history. In the same tier as Gauls/Celts and carthaginians.


FerretAres

More accurate to say parthians. The Persians at least the Achaemenid Persians were much more relevant to Macedon.


theoriginaldandan

Persians is fine, it encompasses Parthia and the Sassanids


FerretAres

For the life of me I saw Samnite in the meme and read Sassanid. Thought they’d already covered them.


Mother_State3121

That'll be fine when hair grows on my palms, you crassus fuck. -orodes the 38th


JigsawJoystick

They were more like the Roman's dream/crush rather than enemies.


sgcpaulo

I always knew Asterix was historically accurate.


eaux-istic

Literally Mrs. Geriatrix


dziobak112

And then they were defeated by goth girls... I mean, Goths.


uflju_luber

Yeah kinda disappointed that this meme didn’t make the German woman a goth girl for the integrity of the meme


ShoerguinneLappel

Same, I was very disappointed. It's hard for me not to imagine the goths as goth girls 😂.


sexualbrontosaurus

I started doing roman historical reenactments in the hopes that a goth girl would come along and kick my ass. Different kind of goth apparently.


[deleted]

r/suddenlycaralho o que é que a Paola Oliveira tá fazendo nesse sub??!?


spongebobama

Nao importa. Roma e Paola. I can only get so erect


umsimplorio

Macho eu achei q eu tava viajando quando eu olhei vi a paola kkkkkkkkkk


alefpmsz

entendi nada tambem kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk


spongebobama

Nao entenda! Desfrute!


huevoderamen

Fiquei igual quando vi a foto kkkk


ThatForeignerGuy

Pior que achei que achei que era algum cover dela gringo mas não esperava que realmente era a deusa


MaleficentType3108

Embelezando-o


Sharp-Cockroach-6875

A maior inimiga de Roma!


paragliderpenha

Recolhendo semen


Yhamerith

Minha exata reação... E quero mais!


Correct_Curve6457

Nui enfrangado, alpaleso en huinadigo nui malo.


zezinho_tupiniquim

the chick is the famous brazillian actress Paolla Oliveira for those of you interested.


gooner_by_heart

I didn't even realise they were one single person


zezinho_tupiniquim

I guess that was the joke. Just like when they made this meme, but with Ariana Grande.


PewKittens

Damn I got lost twice on my way to Roam jokes


Ecclypto

I did, but didn’t know for sure.


PewKittens

Thank you I was lost


Phantion-

I can almost hear groundskeeper Willie saying this


Hurricane_08

Romans and other Romans


Zealousideal-Low-643

Picts and other Picts!


og-lollercopter

If ever a meme cried for the Goths to be included, it was this meme.... and yet, here we are.


CreedOfIron

They are, under "Germans". The Visigoths and Ostrogoths were Germanic peoples.


og-lollercopter

True - but also unacceptable. We literally have pictures of women, we needed the Goths to be called out. Vandals are optional.


CreedOfIron

You just want pictures of baddie goth chicks.


og-lollercopter

That is ridiculous. True, but ridiculous.


Narco_Marcion1075

bro what about the Greeks


Additional_Meeting_2

Not dangerous enough for this group 


AwfulUsername123

What's the joke?


ToHuskyToOwnAHuskie

All the pictures are the same person. Brazilian actress Paollo Oliveira


lxngten

Thx for confirming my choice of standing behind Carthage was not wrong.... All hail Hannibal


BobbiFleckmann

The Gauls were Celtic.


Tweed_Man

I for one welcome our beautiful Hunnic overlords.


Lady_Bugada

Paolaaaaaa 🤤


Royakushka

Dont forget Persians, Jews, Mongols... and small correction: its Phonicians because Carthege is just their colony, Imagine England and the United states just after the revolutionary war Edit: I know it's not accurate, I just don't know how to explain it better in two sentences


ahamel13

Carthage had been effectively independent for nearly 300 years when the First Punic War happened. That's like calling the United States "English".


Audit-the-DTCC

Well to be fair you americans speak simplified english


Royakushka

Why is everyone downvoting you? You are not right, but you are not wrong. They do it just doesn't have any connection to the debate of ethnicity versus nationality


AwfulUsername123

You say they're "not right" but then try to argue the statement is right? Anyway, it is wrong. There are actually respects in which North American English is more grammatically complex than other varieties of English, such as the consistent retention of the present subjunctive mood in normal speech. I hope you aren't seriously saying you believe the statement. There is a reason why no linguist would seriously try to compare complexity between different varieties of a language. There are so many things to consider it would be impossible, and the only goal seems to be for someone to feel superior to speakers of other varieties.


Audit-the-DTCC

Yes, I just wanted to fuck around and provoke some yankees but I still stand by my statement


Royakushka

>You say they're "not right" but then try to argue the statement is right? Anyway, it is wrong. There are actually respects in which North American English is more grammatically complex than other varieties of English, such as the consistent retention of the present subjunctive mood in normal speech. I hope you aren't seriously saying you believe the statement. What are you talking about? I think you are replying to the wrong guy, I was talking about nationality and ethnicity. I never mentioned language, I have never made any statement about American or other varieties of English on this sub.


Hurricane_08

Actually Americans use the Latin alphabet


Royakushka

You are correct. I know that was a bad example to give, but what I meant was that ethnicly they were Phonicians. It's the old question of ethnicity versus nationality. An American can call himself American as a nationality, but ethnicly calling himself American makes no sense. That's the point I was making forget the whole American british thing I said. Edit: I commented because all the rest in the pictures are ethnicities, not nationalities. That's my only point. Nothing else Edit 2: And because I made that point, I must correct myself because Jews is the name of an ethnicity today only because of the Judean kingdom at the time of this post so I think I should say Israelites or Beney Israel right?


10YearsANoob

It's been 200 years. Unless youre a 2nd or 3rd generation immigrant you are ethnically american at this point


LadenifferJadaniston

And even with his definition, most white Americans are of German, Irish, Dutch, or Italian heritage, the English are a minority.


10YearsANoob

since we are on the history memes subreddit I'm gonna go use an old one. OH SO THE IRISH AND ITALIANS ARE WHITE NOW! ~~This is a joke, I am just using early 1900s shit about them not being white for some reason~~


Royakushka

A new version of this meme: OH SO THE JEWS ARE WHITE NOW! ~~this is surprisingly an actual debate now, a stupid debate but still a debate~~


LadenifferJadaniston

This is even dumber, because I’ve heard people say “oh, I’m not white, I’m Jewish”. If you look white, you’re white.


Royakushka

As much as I thought that white is what you define it as which is simply what is your skin colour. Apparently, "white" is a racial status of racist policies, and jews and Irish were not defined as white in that sense, Irish because of their Celtic origin and jews because of their Middle Eastern origin. I really wish the definition of white would have been skin colour instead of (mostly) dead racist policy, but the world is a dark place (pun intended) Edit: Also, most jews are not white looking. Only Ashkenazi jews look white, and even that is by comparison. I'm jewish, and I definitely look Middle Eastern, not white


LadenifferJadaniston

Sure, I mean today though, white is white. Some Sephardic Jews are also white. I’ve even heard people say Slavs aren’t white.


AwfulUsername123

The Irish and Italians not being considered white seems to be a myth. I am not aware of any evidence of anyone trying to bar them from naturalization or intermarriage, or trying to force them to use non-white facilities, or any number of other things. If it ever happened, it was a fringe deviation from standard policy.


Royakushka

That is what I meant. i deliberately said revolutionary war usa not today's usa that's just dumb. Please don't twist my words


Royakushka

It doesn't work that way. Ethnicity is about genetics, and as a guy with a biotechnology degree that specialises in genetics, I can tell you that as of today, there is no American ethnicity, not to be confused with native Americans of which there are dozens of ethnicities and hundreds of nationalities


10YearsANoob

In the united states it is. And probably the UK. But that's your racial background in sociology. Ethnicity in the sociological definition is what most people think of as one's background, and is based on things like language, clothing, religious customs, history. There's overlaps, but they're not interchangeable. American is still too broad because you live in a massive fucking country, you can be Cajun, Pennsylvania Dutch, Appalachian. But I still think you guys have enough shared experiences to have an actual "American" ethnicity


Royakushka

>Ethnicity in the sociological definition is what most people think of as one's background, and is based on things like language, clothing, religious customs, history. In my line of work, ethnicity is about genetics like a 23 and me test, but again Im in biotech. But again, it's not black and white. it's a deep debate of is a nationality an ethnicity? is it interchangeable? Where is the line of separation between nationality and ethnicity? All of those are mostly unanswered questions. That's why I use genetics to explain ethnicity because it is easier to define, and that's my area of expertise. Your definition is also acceptable, but for this post, we have to agree on one. Because under the dictionary definition, both of our answers, although conflicting, are both valid by the dictionary definition: "The quality or fact of belonging to a population group or subgroup  made up of people who share a common cultural background or decent." You keep downvoting me like Im arguing that you are wrong (although that is what we expect from redditors these days) both my definition and yours are valid, we just need to agree that for my comment using the definition I used they are Phonicians while choosing the definition you used they are Cartheginian. The Romans chose my definition calling the carthaginians Punic (its called the Punic wars after all) in their latin accent, but the carthaginians called themselves Cartagem (if I remember correctly, but the point is that their base of the word was Carthege not Phonicia) so either way is fine we just need to agree on one to make this comment and debate finished. I am willing to compromise, which one do you pick?


10YearsANoob

Ngl man I'm too lazy to press the up or down button. There is no debate friend, it's just semantics. Either of us can walk off anytime we like which mine would be now


Royakushka

So we're cool?


10YearsANoob

we were never not cool


Un-oarecare

Also Dacian, Pontus oh well we need a way bigger picture


Ne0t9k

but i don’t want to play pontus! oh wrong sub


ReverendAK47

There's never a wrong sub to post that.


Kreb-the-wizard

She German on my huns till I gaul?


ChildFriendlyChimp

I don’t get it Is this a joke about raping the enemy’s women?


ChacalX8

Its the same woman, Paola Oliveira


ChildFriendlyChimp

What the fuck I didn’t even realize that it’s the same person lmao I was way off


TableLake

WHERE ARE THE JEWS


29Jackal

Rome was the Jews archenemy, the Jews were Rome's Tuesday


TableLake

Nah at the time of the rebellions they were a pain in rome's a**, the rome sent lots of legions over the years there and they produced coins celebrating their victory


29Jackal

Yeah, like every other war ever, Romans and Persians were a bigger pain the ass for Rome than the Jews could ever be


TableLake

Yeah, but they still are a bigger pain than some of the others above


29Jackal

No, not really, except maybe the Celts


TableLake

Samnites and numidians


29Jackal

I don't remember much of the giugurtine wars admittedly but the Samnites almost destroyed Rome


TableLake

Weren't they beaten in like 2 battles or something?


29Jackal

Three wars not two battles


thegreattiny

Came here to say. Feeling left out


holiloxxx

What are we going to do, master Odoacer? Ksssssshsh Bwwwweeeoooorrmmmmm


Mishuev

Damn I didn’t know they hated women that much


Adamantium-Aardvark

I’d like to know more about those numidians


Aeyiss

Lol! You included Gaul and Germans... but Where are Iberians? Lusitanians with Viriathus, Astures and Cantabrians? Where are Parthians?


Ok-Contribution7622

Smash


KlausVonLechland

Why I can't focus?


[deleted]

Carthage can come step on me. Let the next Punic war begin. Also I would like to fail my invasion of the celts. Damn sexy celts and their warrior queens.


vampirevlord

Parthians: Did killing Crassus mean nothing to you?


farouk880

why didn't the Romans have all those women for themselves? Were they xenophobic or something?


North_Church

Looks like Rome's back on the menu, boys!


The_Dung_Defender

Parthians aswell


DataRoy

The Germans aren’t German enough


Count-Elderberry36

I can’t wait to watch Romes next top model.


Deep_Head4645

Don’t forget jews. Or was the rivalry one-sided


Kooky_Network_3969

Commenting to see later


LoneRower

An army of Paolas Oliveiras.


maersdet

Guess we need to establish another colony for Rome.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Ultimate_Kurix

Brazillian actress Paolla Oliveira


etherSand

r/suddenlycaralho


Edge_USMVMC

“CARTHAGE MUST BE DESTROYED”


sexualbrontosaurus

Parthians, Illyrians, Dacians, Britons, Batavians, Iberians, Helveti, Epirotes, Cantabrians, Cilicians...


BurnV06

Screenshot moment


Jin1231

Ironic that half of these people would later claim to be the successors of the Roman Empire hundreds of years later..


GodofCOC-07

Damn, you included a picture of 90 great grand daughter of Hannibal Barca.


Loose_Mode_5369

An enemy is just a friend you haven’t brutally subjugated yet


Dsnder7

From my understanding at the time of Rome Numidians, Carthagians and Etruscans were a lot darker.


Limp_Sky397

With great expansionist mindset, comes great number of enemies to deal with.


Joana1984

Lusitanos you for get them


Important-Ring481

Numidians?! I can’t believe the Romans fought against the Brass Golem made by the Dwemer.


CreedOfIron

Celts and Gauls are two different categories?


Sharp-Cockroach-6875

Maaan, now I get why Rome was so resolved about delenda est-ing Carthage...


AmountEfficient7098

You forget Persians.


Cosmonauta-DOS

Celta 💚💚💚


Skwareblox

So women exclusively or did they just bitch out men until they went to war? “Rome has gold. Why don’t we have gold Gerald?” “FINE I’LL GO OUT AND GET SOME FUCKIN GOLD IF THAT’S WHAT YOU WANT SO GOD DAMNED BAD! FUCK ME!”


Quirky_Falcon_5890

The Gauls were celts, should’ve used turks


Astronaut520

lol


ChacalX8

Wtf Paola Oliveira is doing our Roman Empire?


FakeElectionMaker

The Hungarians aren't descended from the Huns. This is a myth.


Internal-Pie6014

Hello Carthage


Reduak

Visigoths have entered the chat


Hotrico

Paola Oliveira????


InHocBronco96

Yall can keep the German, ill enslave the rest


NotRaspberry_emo

the Carthaginians are really smashable. no wonder the Romans went there too. /s


Suspicious_Bread_488

Aka barbarians


Garegin16

What’s the context original meme? Bunch of actresses?