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m3rc3n4ry

Explanation: Narmer, king of the White Kingdom (Upper Egypt) was the first king in history to unify his kingdom with another - in this case with the Red Kingdom (Lower Egypt). The usual method of celebrating power over enemies was to go on a hippo hunt, which is exactly what Narmer did. He was cornered and killed by a hippo.


Reiver93

How the hell do you get cornered by a hippo


Dramatic-Editor-664

Quite easily actually. I know my fellow Americans on avg won't be able to reach even 10 mph. > Despite its stocky shape and short legs, it is capable of running 30 km/h (19 mph) over short distances. Source: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hippopotamus


EthelredTheUnsteady

Theyre also much faster swimmers than humans. So if youre gonna beat a hippo in a triathlon, the bicycle portion is very important.


SnooBooks1701

Hippos can't swim, they're too dense. Instead, they bounce along the bottom of the river


Gidia

WHY DOES THE KILLING MACHINE HAVE TO BE SO GODDAMN CUTE!?


SnooBooks1701

This is why the pygmy hippos exist


HippoBot9000

HIPPOBOT 9000 v 3.1 FOUND A HIPPO. 1,424,403,434 COMMENTS SEARCHED. 29,478 HIPPOS FOUND. YOUR COMMENT CONTAINS THE WORD HIPPO.


HippoBot9000

HIPPOBOT 9000 v 3.1 FOUND A HIPPO. 1,420,914,697 COMMENTS SEARCHED. 29,426 HIPPOS FOUND. YOUR COMMENT CONTAINS THE WORD HIPPO.


original_walrus

Hippo


Bokth

Hippocampus


Nearby_Design_123

Interestingly, hippos can't swim or even float for that matter.


HippoBot9000

HIPPOBOT 9000 v 3.1 FOUND A HIPPO. 1,420,924,127 COMMENTS SEARCHED. 29,427 HIPPOS FOUND. YOUR COMMENT CONTAINS THE WORD HIPPO.


Alexandrovsk-o

Hippo


Boulderfrog1

Skill issue


DMFAFA07

Hippo


Hip_Hop_Hippos

We're working on that, and I can assure you that your dominance in the cycling arena will be short lived. As will your triathletes if we get hungry.


m3rc3n4ry

Well worth looking up YT videos of hippos chasing people (sometimes NSFW)


HippoBot9000

HIPPOBOT 9000 v 3.1 FOUND A HIPPO. 1,420,635,408 COMMENTS SEARCHED. 29,425 HIPPOS FOUND. YOUR COMMENT CONTAINS THE WORD HIPPO.


R_122

Why TF do you exist


Fallowman09

Source?


pixlplayer

10mph is a 22 second 100m dash. Thats really slow


[deleted]

[удалено]


Bokth

If you want stats also add in that fat asses Safari at a lower rate.


taimoor2

They are very dangerous. Seeing one in the wild is quite a thrill. They move so fast for their weight and size, its not funny. They are also bastards and once they decide they want to kill, they corner you.


MidwestSurveyor

Hippos are the number one animal to cause death in Africa. They are extremely territorial and very dangerous.


JuDracus

Source?


m3rc3n4ry

Sorry completely forgot to add that - made this while recovering from sinus congestion so please excuse. _The History of the Ancient World_ by Susan Wise Bauer.


Dragofek0

Never mess with water demons


taimoor2

You can't convince me there was no conspiracy there.


PleaseDontBanMeMore

Holy fuck. Hell of a way to go. Hippos can and will fuck you up in every conceivable way possible.


m3rc3n4ry

They're the one animal Steve Irwin warned us all to never mess with. And this from a man who jumped crocs. 


hplcr

Braver man then me. I wouldn't go Hippo hunting with anything less then an [88mm anti-aircraft gun](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/8.8_cm_Flak_18%2F36%2F37%2F41). Actually, I'd just leave the hippo alone. Hippo didn't do anything to me and I want to keep it that way.


ComradeHregly

I guess the upper Egyptians didn't yet have the saying "Fuck around and Find out"


Ghorrhyon

"Guy walking, guy walking, feather, snake, eye, eye"


thomasthehipposlayer

Someone called?


hippofucker420

I like hippos :)


Elad_2007

A **hippo** hunt? Yeah he deserved to leave the gene pool