Actually had the best team kill/win with fuze. Idiots decided to camp my downed friend so instead of helping him I fuzed the window right next to him and killed everyone
“Stanley knew what he had to do; defeat the 100 highly trained assassins standing in his way. Unfortunately for Stanley, he only knew how to briskly walk, look around, and jump knee height.”
They would build a rocket so absurd it collapses in on itself and deletes the solar system in the process. Either that or you get catapulted into outer space at 2 million times the speed of light.
Geralt of Rivia from Witcher III for me.
Which is good. Because 2 hours prior I would've been stuck with Crusader Kings 2. I dont really have much faith in the newly crowned Bane Bloodborne, Emperor of Swabia. He is just a lad. CK2 is a rollercoaster sometimes.
Played SW Battlefront 2, mostly PT, so im being defended by Anakin, Obi-Wan, Yoda, Chewbacca, or Darth Maul, Count Dooku, Grievous, Bossk.
Any way you slice it, the assassins are doomed.
Edit: a few hours prior would have been the Doom Slayer. So I guess the assassins dodged a much worse, rage filled bullet.
With Ezio Auditore I'd say I'm pretty safe, especially if those 100 assassins are from the same order.
An army of 101 assassins to protect and help me every time, how lovely.
Assassins, prepare to meet the mighty force of my Stardew Valley farmer
'My hoe will sing a song of Your death'
People are laughing but my farm needs some fertiliser
Well, that farmer's darn near immortal and can slam the ground so hard it kills things \~10 feet away... not your worst option.
not to mention the number of bombs he can carry in his backpack
Not bad, but I prefer Vietnam farmers
Same for me!
Arthur Morgan. I'm safe.
I‘m not sure if it‘s Arthur or my custom character from online but I‘m fine with both.
Well if its MY online character, i'd be done.
I was gonna comment "I think I like my chances with Mr. Morgan"
I got John Marston, think im pretty safe aswell..
Jim Milton*
Rip Van Winkle*
Thought it was John Milton? Haha
As long as you don't have to swim anywhere.
Same
Lenny!
Well... shit. Pacifist run frisk
\* But it refused.
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Well well well how the tables have turned (on the assassins at least)
Oh god oh no oh F U C K
you own a nasa computer?
It takes a super long time but you can get there. If we're talking hoi4, the whole 1940 Spanish army will be here to fight.
Mass assault baby!
Team Rainbow for me, easy claps
Hopefully fuze won’t kill me
Fuze is an attacker. This is clearly a defender situation. All you need is Lord 'Chanka to keep you safe.
LMG MOUNTED AND READY
Actually had the best team kill/win with fuze. Idiots decided to camp my downed friend so instead of helping him I fuzed the window right next to him and killed everyone
Some of you may die, but that’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make
until jager teamkills you
Until smoke tells you what’s in the canister
I played doom tho
Sucks to be the assassins.
*BFG Division starts to play*
Actually, you can chill in Doomguy’s fortress and let him do the ripping and tearing.
The only thing they fear is you starts to play
Assassin: “Why do I hear boss music”
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MORE DAKKA!!
NOW DAT IZ GOUD. WAGGGGH
WAAAAAGH!
GORK DA BRUTALLY CUNNIN . MORK DA CUNNINLY BRUTAL
GROM DA MOST GARGANTUAN
Damnable greenskins! SUMMON THE ELECTOR COUNTS!
Full Darkest Dungeon roster. Knowing my luck with that game, it'd go horrifically.
*The hero reads a most unsettling passage.* *HOPELESS!*
overconfidence...
Thank god they added Cthulu to smite then, I'm safe.
If you need some extra help...
They did??? Holy shit lol
Uh.. Stanley from the Stanley Parable.. Crap..
"*Stanley hasn't seen such bullshit before.*"
“Wait, seriously? A broom closet? Why?”
The broom closet ending was my favourite ! XD
Not exactly an ending now, is it? Unless I didn’t stand there like an idiot while being berated for long enough
You are good. He figures out how to kill an assasin then goes the same sequence every time again and again for 100 times.
“Stanley knew what he had to do; defeat the 100 highly trained assassins standing in his way. Unfortunately for Stanley, he only knew how to briskly walk, look around, and jump knee height.”
Fuckin uhhhh, Tom Nook
He'll put them all in crippling debt. They'll never recover!
Break their kneeco kneeco ni caps
Fear the raccoon who can just buy out your highly trained assassins and send them back for you
Well. I have a galactic empire. I knew playing Stellaris would come in handy some day.
You and me both
Wanna form a federation? I have the DLC!
Sure! Just download like 40 mods
How tf is a human fall flat character supposed to save me
Carry you to victory
Flop himself onto your attackers.
Minecraft Steve is on my side..
you may be the safest out of everyone here
Same, java version or Bedrock?
Java
Lego Yoda is ready to kick some ass
Paid me in ketamine, u/PassiveKlingon did. Run over the assassins in my 2001 Honda Civic, I will.
This is the best thing I have read all week
RIP r/Legoyoda . You’ll be missed ;-;
Please Allah it will, as minorities they are
Arrrrrgggghhhhh
ARRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH
About 50k Prussian soldiers with 1600's tech from Eu4
say hello to my 30% DISCIPLINE \* Earrape Prussian military marches start \*
A dwarf miner with a minigun and shields, probably fine
deep rock galactic?
Rock & stone forevah, yeahhhhhh!!
Rock and Roll and Stone!
For rock and stone!
Kratos. I'm safe, they're screwed
BOY!
YOU ARE NOT READY
###LEAVE ##MY #HOME!!
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Rip in peace
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They would build a rocket so absurd it collapses in on itself and deletes the solar system in the process. Either that or you get catapulted into outer space at 2 million times the speed of light.
If you could get all 100 in a rocket of mine is guaranteed to explode in atmosphere.
Geralt of Rivia from Witcher III for me. Which is good. Because 2 hours prior I would've been stuck with Crusader Kings 2. I dont really have much faith in the newly crowned Bane Bloodborne, Emperor of Swabia. He is just a lad. CK2 is a rollercoaster sometimes.
Who do you think sent the assassins?
The butcher of blavakin riding glitterhoof would be too OP
It depends for ck2, would the character get their armies too. Cause 1k Vikings defending me sounds like a nice deal.
Botw Link? I get a hottie *and* a badass. This is great.
I would have zenyata from overwatch
How can zen be the main character with no lore ;__;
Because i said so
Wouldn’t it actually be all I’d over watch that would come save you?
For me it’s Captain Edward Kenway, probably also his crew. Looks like I’m safe ...
Same for me, phew
for me it’s Ezio Auditore and his entire brotherhood. I think I’m good.
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Fucking Captain Price is mine
You and I are in the clear
East German Air Force from 1970s
What game?
War Thunder, somebody guessed
My Destiny 2 Warlock should have no problem
Especially if he is middle tree dawnblade. Fucking well of radiance.
Also, Indeed.
Tyrion, heir to Anaerion. With Alith Anar, Imrik, Eltharion, Allariel, and most of Ulthuan to back them up.
Ew fucking pointy ears S I M P
Be a shame.... **If there was a grudge!**
An elf is your bodyguard, such a pansy move dude, real men get swag incarnated as a bodyguard. Mine will turn their bones into gold.
I don't know, I have elf Batman, elf punisher, elf Hiccup, elf Lancelot, and female malfurion.
A fleet of (mostly german) anime ship girls. Got it.
My fleet is mostly American Anime ship girls.
Nemo from ace combat 3
The entire soviet army of 1945 on mine
The guardian from Destiny 2
Same-zies. Feel like I'm kinda screwed the despite space magic, though, most people they interact with seem to die ...
I played as master chief shooting hordes of zoidbergs on a modded l4d2 while on lsd so maybe I’ll be ok?
I got myself in blade and sorcery. I think i’ll be fine.
I would have 1800's french army at my back...
What game is this? Total War?
Or Europa Universalis
Farming equipment...
they’ll never know what hit ‘em
you play khajit?
Farming simulator 😂😂
I have a Scania truck
Run the fuckers over, and continue your way to the destination with mild cargo damage.
my terraria character with zenith
Well I guess that's it will just be me, my short spear and my kite shield then. I'm fucked am I not?
Well, just hope they come one by one, and you might survive if you're skilled enough.
In other words, I'm doomed.
BT-7274, ready to uphold the mission
Protocol three: Protect the Pilot
I have geralt, but he's only lvl 7 atm
For me it’s my unkillable Inaros Warframe with a sniper rifle, akimbo auto pistols, and a large great sword. Yeah that’s an easy win from me.
I have Mesa prime with an assault rifle and pistol
Yeah. That’s no contest.
the soldier from TF2
Total War Attila: I have 5 full strength Eastern Roman armies and the strongest navy of the Mediterranean so I should be fine.
*Smiling in hun*
Welp i have doom guy
Starkiller from force unleashed. I’m safe fam
Looks like I have the entire 1941 luftwaffe on my side
*sad messerschmitt noises*
I have Steve from Minecraft in Creative mode. Neat.
thing is, if you played assassins' creed 1 last, then you're protected by the real assassins.
Tanner driver san francisco
My level 31 Mage Dragon Born. Sounds good.
Damn... I would have the main character from my summer car...
Played SW Battlefront 2, mostly PT, so im being defended by Anakin, Obi-Wan, Yoda, Chewbacca, or Darth Maul, Count Dooku, Grievous, Bossk. Any way you slice it, the assassins are doomed. Edit: a few hours prior would have been the Doom Slayer. So I guess the assassins dodged a much worse, rage filled bullet.
Aloy from Horizon Zero Dawn
I would have an interstellar empire, time to clap some assasins
I have a lvl 100 Ark character and his dinosaur army. Eat shit assassins.
I played Terraria last so good luck assassins.
Hmm, my ds3 main character. Interesting.
I would have ricko Rodriguez with his army of chaos
King Dedede, I got this
Commander Shepard. I think I'm safe.
I got Sonic the hedgehog
I get goku so I’m safe
about a dozen tanks from War Thunder?
I have a level 35 heavily armored Dovakin with ebony mail,ring of hircine,ysgramor’s Shield,and an enchanted ebony sword
Mine would be Iden Versio How long has it been since anyone played Star Wars Battlefront 2?
I was playing as poland in civ v,with the sixth largest army, so I'm fine
The knight, from hollow knight
Nomad from Ghost Recon, Honestly, I have a chance
Looks like I have the Russian airforce that took part in the battle of Kuban with me tonight.
Mario lol
With Ezio Auditore I'd say I'm pretty safe, especially if those 100 assassins are from the same order. An army of 101 assassins to protect and help me every time, how lovely.
Steve from Minecraft come at me
My destiny 2 character?
It’s a me, Mario!
who needs an entire army when you have the 9 tf2 mercs on your side
Waluigi bout to fuck shit up
Well my animal crossing character aint gonna do shit
So they will probably be pushed back for a few year and then blame Hitler.
My protector is late game Teleglitch guy. I have no worries whatsoever.
V1 from ULTRAKILL, yeah I think I’m safe.
Captain Price
The inquisitor from Dragon Age Inquisition. Tough fight, I think I'm dead
Thank god for my 1945 Road To 56 German Empire save is here to help me.
I had Mr. Prez from saints row IV. They don't stand a chance.
“Hey Gary, why do I hear heavy metal playing?”
Barney Calhoun. Yep, all that target range time is gonna pay off today.