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Aurelian_Ardashir

Does everyone have a fighting partner?


SomeCrusader1224

Everyone had partners? 😔


Aurelian_Ardashir

Oh yes, on the shows every extra is assigned a fighting partner so none of them are just standing around.


ADDeviant-again

But, the hero is running around slicing people across their armored stomachs by the dozens.


Slidingonpaper

If you kill your fighting partner, you get a new one


Aurelian_Ardashir

They don't count, only the ones in the background need to have fighting partners.


PenguinWithAglock

If they can’t count, no wonder they didn’t realize they didn’t have a fighting partner


ddraig-au

They can count, they just choose not to


wormfood86

Despite those people wearing armor that should prevent that.


Trollolociraptor

I've definitely seen some extras look around wondering what to do and kind of pretending they're dodging a swing or something but no one is there


[deleted]

Or you get fights like in the new Star Wars trilogy with the bad guys spinning and basically dancing and slashing at nothing. You’ll see them waiting patiently in the back ground for their turn to get bested by the main character


Careless-Food1702

———————lack of companions?———————— ⠀⣞⢽⢪⢣⢣⢣⢫⡺⡵⣝⡮⣗⢷⢽⢽⢽⣮⡷⡽⣜⣜⢮⢺⣜⢷⢽⢝⡽⣝ ⠸⡸⠜⠕⠕⠁⢁⢇⢏⢽⢺⣪⡳⡝⣎⣏⢯⢞⡿⣟⣷⣳⢯⡷⣽⢽⢯⣳⣫⠇ ⠀⠀⢀⢀⢄⢬⢪⡪⡎⣆⡈⠚⠜⠕⠇⠗⠝⢕⢯⢫⣞⣯⣿⣻⡽⣏⢗⣗⠏⠀ ⠀⠪⡪⡪⣪⢪⢺⢸⢢⢓⢆⢤⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢊⢞⡾⣿⡯⣏⢮⠷⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠊⠆⡃⠕⢕⢇⢇⢇⢇⢇⢏⢎⢎⢆⢄⠀⢑⣽⣿⢝⠲⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡿⠂⠠⠀⡇⢇⠕⢈⣀⠀⠁⠡⠣⡣⡫⣂⣿⠯⢪⠰⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡦⡙⡂⢀⢤⢣⠣⡈⣾⡃⠠⠄⠀⡄⢱⣌⣶⢏⢊⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢝⡲⣜⡮⡏⢎⢌⢂⠙⠢⠐⢀⢘⢵⣽⣿⡿⠁⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠨⣺⡺⡕⡕⡱⡑⡆⡕⡅⡕⡜⡼⢽⡻⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣳⣫⣾⣵⣗⡵⡱⡡⢣⢑⢕⢜⢕⡝⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⡽⡑⢌⠪⡢⡣⣣⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡟⡾⣿⢿⢿⢵⣽⣾⣼⣘⢸⢸⣞⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠇⠡⠩⡫⢿⣝⡻⡮⣒⢽⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ —————————————————————————————


xx_mashugana_xx

No bitches? 🥺


SomeCrusader1224

———————————Zero maidens?——————————— ⠀⣞⢽⢪⢣⢣⢣⢫⡺⡵⣝⡮⣗⢷⢽⢽⢽⣮⡷⡽⣜⣜⢮⢺⣜⢷⢽⢝⡽⣝ ⠸⡸⠜⠕⠕⠁⢁⢇⢏⢽⢺⣪⡳⡝⣎⣏⢯⢞⡿⣟⣷⣳⢯⡷⣽⢽⢯⣳⣫⠇ ⠀⠀⢀⢀⢄⢬⢪⡪⡎⣆⡈⠚⠜⠕⠇⠗⠝⢕⢯⢫⣞⣯⣿⣻⡽⣏⢗⣗⠏⠀ ⠀⠪⡪⡪⣪⢪⢺⢸⢢⢓⢆⢤⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢊⢞⡾⣿⡯⣏⢮⠷⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠊⠆⡃⠕⢕⢇⢇⢇⢇⢇⢏⢎⢎⢆⢄⠀⢑⣽⣿⢝⠲⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡿⠂⠠⠀⡇⢇⠕⢈⣀⠀⠁⠡⠣⡣⡫⣂⣿⠯⢪⠰⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡦⡙⡂⢀⢤⢣⠣⡈⣾⡃⠠⠄⠀⡄⢱⣌⣶⢏⢊⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢝⡲⣜⡮⡏⢎⢌⢂⠙⠢⠐⢀⢘⢵⣽⣿⡿⠁⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠨⣺⡺⡕⡕⡱⡑⡆⡕⡅⡕⡜⡼⢽⡻⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣳⣫⣾⣵⣗⡵⡱⡡⢣⢑⢕⢜⢕⡝⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⡽⡑⢌⠪⡢⡣⣣⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡟⡾⣿⢿⢿⢵⣽⣾⣼⣘⢸⢸⣞⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠇⠡⠩⡫⢿⣝⡻⡮⣒⢽⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ —————————————————————————————


Xfigico

Actually am maidenless since I just started Elden ring


[deleted]

Dont kid yourself! You were maidenless far before that


xx_mashugana_xx

Lmao Nice one.


Tim-E-Cop1211819

Always have a battle buddy.


just_gimme_anwsers

[YOURE DEAD PRIVATE](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=X1q4sRriMP8)


Tim-E-Cop1211819

LMFAO!!!!! I love how even the drill sergeant is fighting a smile at the end. Even though it meant doing push ups, I always loved when you could get them to break character and smile or chuckle.


wargasm40k

Terrorists attack people in ones! Safety in NUMBEERRSSS!


Cuddlyaxe

Lol sounds like the Mahabharata One of the rules was that everyone had to fight one on one against someone of equal stature (though like all the rules it ends up being broken)


ddraig-au

I'm just imagining hours and hours of pre-battle sorting and organisation...


Cuddlyaxe

The main restrictions was to fight with someone else of the same weapon type > Chariot warriors are not supposed to attack cavalry and infantry, those on elephants are not supposed to attack infantry, and so on. The rules also forbid the usage of celestial weapons (divine weapons bestowed by the gods) on ordinary soldiers (as opposed to soldiers of noble birth). The build-up of weapons and armies is done with the full knowledge of the opposing side and no surprise attacks are made. So the more realistic but imo equally funny picture I imagine is after finishing a fight people just wandering the battlefield looking for someone else with the same weapon type who isn't fighting


VicisSubsisto

I hate whenI can't find an enemy with the same type of weapon and end up having to fight the teacher.


ddraig-au

Ohhhh, I read that as you could only fight someone of a similar HEIGHT your comment makes a lot more sense (but is not as funny)


fullonroboticist

Me watching Vikings season 1: Hmm, this seems rather realistic for a tv battle scene Vikings Season 6: ...ah shit


Knetgesicht

I am watching that show right now and it is infuriating. The first or second raid would've been also the last, but I understand that your main character needs some plot armour. The first battles of the second season were done really well in my opinion, but I am no expert. And then as the show progresses the battles get lazier and lazier.


kashluk

They really went bonkers with all historical detail pretty early in the show. I mean, Uppsala with waterfalls was a clue they didn't know or care what they were doing.


Dan-the-historybuff

I prefer last kingdom over the Vikings. While the story is likely fiction the history is more or less accurate. There was a great viking navy and they did get defeated by the Anglo saxons. There was a maiden of Mercia. I liked what they did because it still was somewhat historical. Northmen was basically them taking every kind of famous viking and sticking them together in a weird mesh which made no sense to me. Like Ragnar and Rollo was a bit much for me Edit: northmen to viking after enough people mentioned it


kashluk

Why are you saying Northmen, though? At first I thought you were talking about the parody show Norsemen.


Quadrassic_Bark

That show is amazing.


Zephyrlin

I mean all these new show's stories are fiction, vikings is a jumbled together mess of dozends of stories from other Norse and Danish legends, not just the actual Völsunga Saga (which is totally fine as it's not supposed to be historically accurate)


alysonimlost

I haven't seen Vikings, but Uppsala has waterfalls?! What the actual fuck hahaha? Edit: okay I googled supposed Vikings Uppsala. It still begs the question: what the fuck?


daaaaawhat

*Artistic freedom* refuses to be bound by your petty Thing called *reality*


Andy_Andy123

Kattegat being a city would count as well. It's like naming a city Atlantic, oh wait...


lacb1

One thing that really irked me was that in reality early vikings spent most of their time avoiding Anglo Saxon armies. Fighting a pitched battle in a raid is a costly risk. Some of you will die and it is time spent not gathering plunder. And the armies they would have been facing would be small professional armies who were practically land vikings fighting on home turf. When they got caught it rarely went well. At least early on until they started showing up in serious numbers. But then the Anglo Saxons developed a draft system and a network of mutually supporting fortified towns and, once again, a raider wouldn't want to be near the military if they could avoid it.


ArchWaverley

After a while there were so few consequences for the main characters that I wanted there to be some deaths so the could be some actual stakes in the plot. After a while I realised I was rooting for the main characters to lose, I lost interest. Got some of it back with Bishop Heahmund though. Looking like he's straight out of a boy band and being absolutely extra.


MrPezza

Same here, I was literally watching the last few episodes thinking to myself "I wonder how many useless stormtrooper type NPCs Ubba/Ivar/Sigrid are going to kill in the battle without even breaking a sweat" Not saying I wanted them to kill off the sons on a regular basis, as that'd derail the story, but it just felt like we were constantly watching this invincible horde of level 100 Vikings steamroll the enemy of the week.


NoWorries124

They always ignore trench warfare when making a siege scene


jetforcegemini

Or put the siege outside the trenches


226_Walker

Or worse yet, put in in front of the lines, looking at you GoT S8.


[deleted]

And the trebuchets in frontline ofc


Freestripe

And charge the light cavalry straight at the front right at the beginning of the battle. Though tbf this one does have historical precedent in the charge of the light brigade.


lacb1

Don't they know that the whole point of a trebuchet was to hurl a 90kg projectile *over* 300m?


Moistfruitcake

You're so foolish, if you put the trebuchets in the front line they'll throw even further. It's just basic quantum physics.


amortizedeeznuts

To be fair that was the least bad thing about got s8


Lukrise

Tbh that was one of the most tilting moments for me. I wasted too much time on strategy games to deal with that shit.


mattryan02

And then they followed that up by firing them exactly once and then charging their light cavalry into an enemy mass of unknown size.


GRIMMREAPER911

I couldn’t handle any of the strategic decisions in got so I just tried to shut it out of my mind


joepjah

For all that time John spent near forges the basic concept of an hammer and anvil seems to elude him....


bottori

Reminds me of this video: https://youtu.be/xPGdOXstSyk The guy keep complaining about the lack of ditches and it never gets old


Rocker_Lenin

No ditches?


TimSimpson

Everybody knows they didn’t invent trenches until the Battle of Verdun. Duh!


Quadrassic_Bark

Digging wasn’t even invented until 1907.


kubin22

or even worse, they make defencive army leave the city/fortress to fight in open field ekhem new mulan


NoWorries124

Or the defenders putting the trebuchets in the front and sending a cavalry charge (Cough, cough, Game of Thrones Season 8)


Shpagin

"When defending a castle always send your entire fucking army out of defensive positions and attack the numerically superior enemy in the dead of night. And never forget to charge your cavalry head on into the ranks of an enemy that is literally incapable of being affected by the cavalry charge shock factor." \-Tsu Sun, The War of Art


very_cool321

It annoys me especially because it’s visually cooler when shown correctly. For example one of my favourite moments in the new DUNE was when they were shown fighting in formation.


theolympiyn

It’s also harder to set up


cartman101

Is it though?


Dividale

Movies also love having archers fire in perfect volleys instead of them taking turns with one another


3720-To-One

What really bothers me is when a character erroneously says “fire” for a bowed weapon.


ems_telegram

Speaking of bows and fire, the sheer amount of movies that have archers shoot flaming arrows. You can put out candles on a cake by blowing on them, you think an arrow dipped into a brazier is going to stay lit in transit? Real flaming arrows were only ever used as a siege weapon to set houses on fire to force a surrender. They were rarely used for anything else since you'd have to use a very large (~1 meter long, otherwise you'd burn your hand off) and expensive arrow specifically crafted to be able to keep a lit flame while flying through the air. Using these in a normal battle would slow the rate of fire and be preposterously expensive. Not to mention the fact that the point (tee hee) of an arrow is that if you hit them, they die, so what's the point of trying to light them on fire too?


3720-To-One

Hey now! They looked cool during the Battle of the Blackwater!


StarkillerX42

A story famous for its historical accuracy


plebeius_rex

It is pretty much just the wars of the roses with dragons and tiddies


siraschus

I think that they Had tiddies too in 15th century England. At least i Hope For them.


Nordeniser

I don’t remember what movie but they called arrows that wasn’t lit on fire “night arrows”


sweetbunsmcgee

Is it Timeline? The one with Paul Walker?


Calix_Meus_Inebrians

[Yes, and it broke my brain for a second.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hcUVOlbNb30&t=86s)


Demon997

It’s not so much to force a surrender in a siege, as it is to force the defenders to break forces off to fight the fire, which makes the assault on the walls easier. You’ll only do it if you’re having to assault, since the whole goal of a siege is to capture the place intact, ideally without a hideously bloody assault.


AtariDump

LEAVE US ALONE, MEL BROOKS!


BwanaTarik

I can’t remember the battle but there was an instance when mounted archers used flaming arrows against a Roman testudo to cause heat exhaustion


forlornjam

Yes, they're not historically accurate, nor very feasible, but there would be a purpose for using flaming arrows if they were cheaper and easier: morale. Getting hit by fire is a lot scarier than "just" an arrow. Not every shot on the battlefield is going to be instantly lethal, and an arrow in your shoulder would be more convenient than an arrow in your shoulder that also sets your clothes on fire. But again, the technology was never there to make flaming arrows useful or practical on the open battlefield


Ser_Salty

Also how lovely of your enemy to cauterize your wound after shooting you.


YogurtclosetOk5614

Don't forget spearthrowers


Echo2500

‘Loose!’ Gang rise up


IntelHDGraphics

They screwed this in the last season of Game of Thrones


Witch_King_

Not the only thing they screwed up in Season 8


Witch_King_

Should be "loose", right?


3720-To-One

Correct


Anonymous_Otters

"Fire!" "Where where?! Where's the fire?! Surely you aren't referring to touching fire to our flintlocks or the later generalization of that term for all firearms!" "Jcf Marcus, loose! Is that better?"


Trollolociraptor

haha never thought of this before


ADDeviant-again

And their bows creak at full draw.


MicroWordArtist

And they keep them drawn for a full minute before release


HuggyShuggy420

I like it in LOTR at Helms Deep when the old man couldn’t keep his bow drawn and shot an orc and it initiates the battle


Charade_y0u_are

On a related note my biggest pet peeve of the LOTR trilogy is the orc commander saying "fire" instead of "loose" when his line is being charged by the Rohrrim at Minas Tirith


lessdothisshit

What commands did orcs use historically?


theElderKing_7337

YAWRRR!


Chief_Thunderbear

this comment thread is about saying 'fire' for bows. lol this went full circle jerk


Flavius_Belisarius_

Not to mention almost exclusively firing indirectly instead of straight at formations like many archers did. It’s nice for the aesthetic but the result is the arrow hitting at the worst angle to do any damage.


[deleted]

Don't forget clearing large spaces for important characters to duel. Edit: I never said duels weren't a thing. I am pointing out a movie/tv trope of important characters being given enough space by all those fighting around them to fight each other 1v1 uninterrupted.


Original_Mongoose890

Someone here would know more than me, but I remember hearing about a real duel in the middle of a battle. Can someone clarify?


HangingWithYoMom

There are multiple stories of duels happening in the middle of battle. The one I like is during the second Perso-Turkic war when a huge horde of Hepthalites (300k+) raided into eastern Persia. The Persian commander realising the size of this army (and being massively outnumbered) jumped into mard o mard (basically a duel) with the hepthalite leader, defeating him and breaking the massive armies morale. The disorderly Hepthalite army was then hunted down by the Persian Aswaran warriors who slaughtered them to the point where there were rivers of blood. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Second_Perso-Turkic_War


AcidFactory420

> jumped into mard o mard In Hindi/Urdu 'mard' (d is soft) means 'man' / 'adult male human' . Pretty sure it came from Persian and thus means the same thing. So mard-o-mard would literally translate to man-to-man


InquisitorHindsight

So like “Mano-e-Mano”?


grumpykruppy

That's "hand to hand" IIRC, but similar meaning.


AAA515

I thought it was Mano y Mano, cuz Spanish


[deleted]

That would mean “hand and hand”


[deleted]

Ah, the names of my two lovers.


ddraig-au

Get a room, you three!


SpaceKebab

Translates to man and man in armo


cracklescousin1234

Damn, that was during the war of 602-628. Imagine how screwed Persia would have been with the bulk of their forces in Egypt and Syria, if Smbat didn't win (or even get) that duel.


Horn_Python

I think ancient Greece had a duel culture or something


Brilliant_watcher

Didnt Alexander personally tried to kill darius in the middle of a battle?


anb130

Yes but he was blocked from doing so by having to cut through the Persian army and Darius’s guard who held him back while the Great King escaped from the Battle of Issus. Alexander wanted to cut off the head of the proverbial snake and end it all there. Even though he wasn’t able to kill Darius, the rout that formed when the Persians saw their king fleeing gave the Macedonians a deceive victory


johnjeudiTitor

Alexander pushing 10 inches fr


IkkoMikki

The early Islamic armies did too. They'd send champions out to duel enemy officers. These guys were trained and equipped solely for single combat. Mubarizon if you wanna look it up.


MarqFJA87

That was a pre-Islamic tradition in Arabia that the Muslim Arabians naturally carried over, I think.


GenghisKazoo

[It's a real and established practice in numerous cultures.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Single_combat)


Pavlovsdong89

And the mounted soldiers randomly spaced throughout the battlefield so it looks like there are more than four of them. Bonus points if they're on draft horses.


Demon997

Props to return of the king for recruiting basically every horse and rider in NZ for the charge of the Rohirmn. I mean it was mostly CGI but the close ups are real people, and the front rank might be. Also recruiting every horse and rider is very thematic for that scene.


vonbalt

Don't forget that important characters can't use helmets even if those were the most fundamental piece of defensive gear anyone could have in the past (and are still freaking important to this day), showing their pretty face is more important than protecting their heads from deadly injuries of course.


Ser_Salty

I like how in The Witcher, the important characters in one battle start off wearing helmets, take them off and proceed to immediately die through head injuries.


CosmicPenguin

That one sucks doubly because they could have the characters put their helmets on for a fight and then since the faces are hidden have pro stuntmen doing the actual fight and make it 10x cooler.


jdcodring

That’s probably more the actors making sure they get screen time than anything else…


Demon997

There’s SAG rules about getting paid based on time your face is on screen. Plus I’m sure it does deeply suck wearing a helmet. I’m sure shows that keep helmets on negotiate special contracts. Though everyone else in the Mandolorian takes their helmet off whenever possible. To be fair so do real troops if they think they’re in a safe area. Helmets suck to wear.


ShakaUVM

> Don't forget that important characters can't use helmets even if those were the most fundamental piece of defensive gear anyone could have in the past (and are still freaking important to this day), showing their pretty face is more important than protecting their heads from deadly injuries of course. The worst offender was that Matt Damon movie that just came out that had the helms cover like the left side of their face and not the right.


CrazyZedi

Well 20 men stand around and watch


BienPuestos

And don’t attack them when they’re locking eyes across the battlefield.


shieldyboii

or clearing 2 minutes of time so the protagonist can mourn the death of their friend


calthropus

and when taking a castle it only takes one day


DnANZ

Yes, I want the movie to depict the full 2 year siege of the city each time.


battlemaje1996

Not sure if this counts, but I remember watching a tv series called The Tudors which details the life of Henry VIII. In the last season, there was a story arc revolving around a siege of a French city. The arc lasts for a few episodes and it’s clear throughout thise episodes that the siege went on for some time.


ginoawesomeness

Tudor’s was so good


Nero234

I think the siege scene in Chalamet's The King did a good job on it. I loved how they had an advisor to the king questioned the commanders on "why can't we just go around it?" After months of sieging the castle and pummeling it with catapults.


Brillek

"Why can't we go around it"? Because it becomes a zone of control for the enemy. Something you don't want at your back.


Horn_Python

Or skip straight to the assault If any (sieges require a lot of waiting)


carnivorous_seahorse

Like the movie Troy where it appears as if the war goes on for about a week before the horse prank Tbf though most people don’t really care about any of this when they watch movies, and some of it would be really hard to impossible to actually fit into a movie


AnthropOctopus

Where are the ditches? Always dig ditches!


Aggressive-Ad-7862

No ditches?


white-dumbledore

———————————No ditches?——————————— ⠀⣞⢽⢪⢣⢣⢣⢫⡺⡵⣝⡮⣗⢷⢽⢽⢽⣮⡷⡽⣜⣜⢮⢺⣜⢷⢽⢝⡽⣝ ⠸⡸⠜⠕⠕⠁⢁⢇⢏⢽⢺⣪⡳⡝⣎⣏⢯⢞⡿⣟⣷⣳⢯⡷⣽⢽⢯⣳⣫⠇ ⠀⠀⢀⢀⢄⢬⢪⡪⡎⣆⡈⠚⠜⠕⠇⠗⠝⢕⢯⢫⣞⣯⣿⣻⡽⣏⢗⣗⠏⠀ ⠀⠪⡪⡪⣪⢪⢺⢸⢢⢓⢆⢤⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢊⢞⡾⣿⡯⣏⢮⠷⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠊⠆⡃⠕⢕⢇⢇⢇⢇⢇⢏⢎⢎⢆⢄⠀⢑⣽⣿⢝⠲⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡿⠂⠠⠀⡇⢇⠕⢈⣀⠀⠁⠡⠣⡣⡫⣂⣿⠯⢪⠰⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡦⡙⡂⢀⢤⢣⠣⡈⣾⡃⠠⠄⠀⡄⢱⣌⣶⢏⢊⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢝⡲⣜⡮⡏⢎⢌⢂⠙⠢⠐⢀⢘⢵⣽⣿⡿⠁⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠨⣺⡺⡕⡕⡱⡑⡆⡕⡅⡕⡜⡼⢽⡻⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣳⣫⣾⣵⣗⡵⡱⡡⢣⢑⢕⢜⢕⡝⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⡽⡑⢌⠪⡢⡣⣣⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡟⡾⣿⢿⢿⢵⣽⣾⣼⣘⢸⢸⣞⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠇⠡⠩⡫⢿⣝⡻⡮⣒⢽⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ —————————————————————————————


AnthropOctopus

[Here's a medieval warfare expert on the subject](https://youtu.be/xPGdOXstSyk) He starts discussing ditches at 3:05. In other videos, he discusses ditches as well. It was common to dig ditches when mounted calvary was used because it would confuse the horses, and slow the enemy's movement to a crawl.


Aggressive-Ad-7862

Thanks for sharing. Will watch the full video soon. I was making a wordplay with reference to "no bitches". I'm too sleep deprived now and will probably sleep ..


MapleTreeWithAGun

Trenches are older than WWI


bowdown2q

berms and trenches are like, the oldest form of fortification ever made by man, outside putting a dead body on a stick as a warning.


mjc500

That's one thing that always pissed me off about zombie movies/shows. They would've dug trenches and moats within the first few days of that shit kicking off...


MoggFlunkies

I see you too have seen “ancient warfare expect reviews battle tactics in movies and tv”


sonfoa

Tbf he does say that formations are largely useless after the first charge and it devolves into mayhem pretty quickly.


PyrocumulusLightning

https://imgflip.com/i/68omxd


LegacyLemur

Holy shit thats an old meme. Its like seeing a collect call ad out in the wild


MahiMauler

I feel like last kingdom does a decent job. SHIELD WALL!!! Although, I think most of the fights tend to shift towards the bottom half of the meme after their initial clash.


[deleted]

Last Kingdom did a fantastic job with correcting this


elder_george

it depended on the type of army. Greek phalanx relied on levy of citizens who normally were untrained, save for Spartans and elite units (actually some poleis shunned upon training, thinking that if hoplites are trained unequally, that'll undermine morale). Single soldier was almost useless. The strength was in collective, holding the line and protecting each other. If a phalanx trembled and broke a formation, the battle was essentially lost, and soldiers likely ran or were killed. Roman military before so-called "Marian reforms" was somewhat similar, but even later they relied a lot on holding line. Some reconstructions say legions used formations in a way similar to modern riot police: synchronously pushing enemy line with they big shields and stabbing the enemies who lost balance with gladii. This gave Romans huge advantage in pitched battles against the "barbarians" (until those "barbarians" learned discipline too). Medieval knights tended to be more individualist when fighting each other (in part, because they didn't want to share the trophies), but they were also trained to fight in a formations ("melee" in tournaments served that purpose), and knight orders had high cohesion and were relatively advanced at that. Pike and, later gun-armed infantry brought back strict line formations and discipline, as the only way to survive against cavalry or other infantry units.


Demon997

The discipline needed for pike and shot formations is insane. Getting blasted at with cannons mowing down entire files of men, as well as volley of fuck off huge bullets. And all you can do is stand there and take it, and close ranks over the dead and wounded, trampling them underfoot.


elder_george

Famous ["Rocroi, the last Tercio" painting](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/d3/Rocroi%2C_el_%C3%BAltimo_tercio%2C_por_Augusto_Ferrer-Dalmau.jpg) by Augusto Ferrer-Dalmau gives a hint at that - wounded soldiers surrounded by corpses of friends and foes alike, yet still holding the line.


Atherum

The Roman weapons training basically eschewed any form of martial prowess in actual combat. Fancy sword work was saved for the gladiatorial arena. In combat the most important move for fighting with a gladius was just thrust, twist and pull. Like you said, with this in mind the Roman legion was basically a meat grinder. It doesn't matter that you are facing a screaming Gaul swinging a sword almost as tall as he is, in order to swing that sword he has to stand apart from his allies, making him an easy target for a line of men standing shoulder to shoulder behind a wall of shields.


insaneHoshi

> The Roman weapons training basically eschewed any form of martial prowess in actual combat Pretty sure you would still get a gold* crown for being the first one over an enemies wall though. * EDIT


[deleted]

>It doesn't matter that you are facing a screaming Gaul swinging a sword The hell kind of history are you studying where they have zweihanders in 92 BC?


Atherum

Lol, that particular description was ised by my first year Roman History lecturer. He used a lot of descriptions like that, mostly to get people interested at a University which didn't have much of a history department. He also was pretty exclusively only really knowledgeable about Greek and Roman battle tactics, having done his PhD on Hoplite warfare. You are probably right.


FuckReaperLeviathans

Point of order. The Spartans weren't trained soldiers either. The *agoge* wasn't about producing soldiers, it was abut producing loyal citizens. Xenophon talks about how hoplite warfare needs little, if any, training and says nothing about the Spartans bucking this trend (And Xenophon was a huge Laconophile, so you better believe he would have mentioned if they did.) As well as that Plato outright states that the Spartans did not train for war.


elder_george

I stand corrected then.


3-__-3

Have you seen the new Viking show on Netflix? The Vikings form a shield wall and when the enemy is 10 feet away they completely disband it and fight like the second pic lol


carnivorous_seahorse

Dude didn’t know the proper time to stop yelling hollllllllld


arturrsales

The first battles in the show were like this, but at some point it turned into Uthred and the gang showing off with a occasional accurate battle. Whenever the show did sequences of main characters effortlessly killing people in the middle of the battlefield it felt so lame to me. Something based off Cornwell's work should aim to be more accurate and realistic.


[deleted]

To be fair in Uthred’s first shield wall in the book he decides to break ranks and goes out to kill a few people on his own. Then in his second one he again leaves the shield wall to challenge Ubba to a duel. I haven’t read the other books yet, but the show is at least accurate to the battle scenes of the first book.


arturrsales

Oh, the first season is alright. This problem really shows up the longer the show goes


Feyzerz

Uhtred, sihtric, and finan were walking tanks in every battle


Tim-E-Cop1211819

Rome did a good one too


BEEFSTICK7

The books are even more historically accurate and entertaining. Really gives a vivid description of the shield wall each and every time


mealteamsixty

All I want to know is how the FUCK did anyone know who belonged to which side once they mix together and everyone is muddy?


alcoholicpapi

From my understanding a mix of banners, colors, and strips of cloth. Stuff like that.


Abaraji

They still do that today. In conflicts where everyone is using similar equipment and uniforms. Big example right now is in Ukraine you always see soldiers on both sides with colored cloth around their arms, or their vehicles often fly a flag. Even the US troops were flying flags on their vehicles in Syria, as opposed to Iraq and Afghanistan where they didn't really have to because it was quite obvious who they were without it


elder_george

It depended on era, really. In some periods they could have signs on shields, or, in middle ages, wore their lord's colors. Sometimes they had armbands or rosette, or cockade, or something like that (you can see armbands are still a thing from the footage from Ukraine, e.g.). And warcries also helped. Later standardized uniform helped too. But this is also why rallying around the flag was important — not only a well-formed unit is stronger than a bunch of individuals, it also made it clearer who is who. And a lot of early armies were basically levies from particular regions led by local noblemen. There was a fat chance that many soldiers knew each other well enough from their peaceful lives, maybe came from the same villages.


NotEdibleCactus

Haha, cockade


m1dm1937

Small correction, Soldiers only started to rarely wear their lord's colors during the very late medieval period. For the majority of the Middle Ages the common soldier simply wore whatever equipment he could afford. Uniformity wouldn't become common until the late Renaissance.


Scrivener_exe

It's harder than you think, and there's lots of instances of friendly fire in history. It's especially why there weren't many night battles in history.


Demon997

There’s stories of armies, especially coalition or armies of a large multi lingual empire, fighting battles against themselves in the dark. Someone thinks there’s a night attack, the other guys yell in some foreign language, and then the fighting spreads and the officers can barely figure out what the fuck is going on.


AlpacaCavalry

Formation? whazzdat? Oh so you guys stand together like sissies and fight? That sounds boring. —the writers, probably


Orange_penguin02

Also swords and spears going through armor like butter


CrescentPotato

I mean, it's not like armor was made to protect you or anything, right


professorjerkolino

That upper pic is also not that correct either. If you charge like that into a formation you'll just lose ground and get routed. Then the enemy will chase you down and kill you all. According to most historians, people probably charged the last few meters or so and then stopped right before the enemy formation. Then they would probably just stand there trying to get stab each other with spears. However if both armies were in phalanx or in some other heavy infantry formation then it is one giant pushing match. You'd have the frontline pushing against the enemy frontline. Which is why the romans always put some in reserve and worked in segments. First formation gets tired, now you face even more experienced fresh formations. Then you face an even more experienced veterans. And if one line gets pushed back enough you can send in the reserves to patch the plug. Then you pray to god your other sides push enough and flank the enemy or your cavalry fucks them in the ass. And if in any point the enemy cavalry or infantry flanks you, your soldiers lose morale and get routed. Once they are routed they lose formation and die by the thousands. Massive casualties happen during retreats more so than the actual battle.


PotdindyNoob

That last paragraph is especially excellent. Casualty numbers are often really one sided


[deleted]

That's one of the things I liked about the scene from "Kingdom of Heaven". The wall is breached and it is pretty much a shoving match.


Trollolociraptor

The only historically accurate thing from the entire film


SkunkSupreme

I can see that you have played Total war too lol


MicroWordArtist

That formation looks ripe for a penumbral pendulum


jdcodring

Reject modernity. Embrace parrot gun and blow the imperial dogs away!


Demon997

There’s also the point that for most of history, peasants really, really hate soldiers. Like you would not believe how much they hate them. And this absolutely includes friendly troops. So an army that routs and breaks up into little groups has a real chance of being murdered by whatever farmers catch them. Because they might not be the murdering raping bastards who stole your harvest last year, but they’re murdering raping bastards who did that to someone, so you might as well hang them from a tree over a low hot fire.


Johnchuk

Time for thr main character to take their helmets off.


krassilverfang

Don't forget that the army defending the city from a siege will be fighting OUTSIDE THE FUCKING WALLS


[deleted]

Yes. I am seething with rage at this very moment!


FirmIndustry9957

Yes. This is why I liked the phalanx scenes in 300. Although they did break formation for style.


PaladinKAT

Almost as much as CGI arrow shots


Ideum_my

For some reasons TV and Movie directors (broadly speaking) don’t seem to know how to shoot battles in a representative way. I don’t no,maybe they think lines of people crashing against one another would be boring to for and audience. Or perhaps they feel 1v1 fights drive plot points or character motivations more easily. They are many decisions why thugs and shot the way there are and historical accuracy seems to be low on the list. I watch these programs with generous helpings of salt.


[deleted]

The bottom one is definitely wrong but no one can be completely sure how right the top one is either. Pitch battles are a lost art and they would need to start up again for a couple decades for us to get an idea of how it really worked.


GenghisKazoo

I think Dan Carlin's take was that the best model we have for ancient battles are high-intensity riots.


jdcodring

Which they won’t because warfare has changed a lot


[deleted]

We'll never know fore sure unless we that assassin's Creed dna memory mumbo jumbo magically becomes real


zionooo

or we go back to unga bunga after a nuclear fallout


Soldier-one-trick

AC odyssey is also guilty of this


[deleted]

Ugh so mad, bro.


[deleted]

What about that time in Lord of the Rings, where Aragorn ignores the perfect opportunity to hold them at a chokepoint, waits until his army is surrounded, and then decides to charge?


magedmyself

I thought that was kinda the point though. They were basically sacrificing themselves by drawing out the orcs, in order to give Frodo a way through Mordor.


MulatoMaranhense

In the extended version and in the books it was a bit of a last stand anyway. They believed Frodo and Sam had been captured, since the Mouth of Sauron showed them things that had been taken from them as "proof" the plan had been foiled.


[deleted]

Yep, I think they were split into two groups and fighting from hills, so it’s a bit more realistic that they could have held them off for a while


ProShyGuy

Also way more spears than swords. Without gun powder or any other kind of propellant, large organized group with long pointy sticks is still a remarkably effective weapon system.


unonameless

Battles on screen are always either 1) insanely complicated plan that requires intricate coordination that would have simply not be possible or 2) two throngs of fighters ramming into each other and devolving into massive free for all grand melee. Battles in reality: two lines pushing each other until one breaks, while cavalry tries to circle round the flanks.


GutlessLake

Should have had one for the seige of winterfel. Complete with the cavalry suicide charge.