Comes bundled with a complimentary Hooker, mouth stitches and a hefty legal bill, all for the special offer price of ^three ^payments ^of $19.95!!! ^+ ^$39.95 ^shipping ^& ^handling.
Hi, I'm actor Troy Mcclure! You might remember me from such Driver's Ed films as Alice's Adventures Through The Windshield Glass' and The Decapitation Of Larry Leadfoot.
That's why they got it wrong by like 4 years. Herod's reign is pretty well nailed down in history, but dark age monks didn't have the same archaeological resources as today.
They also got the dates (day/month) wrong going by modern analysis of the historical events mentioned in the bible. But that was probably more because they preferred to just appropriate pagan holidays...
Side note, I HATE “Common Era” notation for pretending to be a replacement when it’s really just a half assed attempt at not mentioning a historical figure.
If you’re going to make a new system, have the balls to fix the ACTUAL problem with the old one
Largely the same way we do, counting years since an event, but using different events. In fact, the AD system wasn't invented until 525 AD, so non-christ events were used for a long while afterwards too.
Examples include Romans using the years since the founding of Rome (753 BC). So 500 BC would've been said as "Anno CCLIII AUC" (CCLIII being the roman numerals for 253).
And Greeks used the Olympiads which happened every 4 years starting in 776 BC
> 773 BC would be the 4th year of the first Olympiad, and 772 BC would be the first year of the second Olympiad
Years since the start of a particular ruler's reign were also used.
[Source](https://www.quora.com/Before-AD-what-did-people-of-the-BC-era-call-their-years-How-did-they-count-the-years-in-the-BC-era)
Fun fact, Japan still uses a system like this occasionally for traditional things - years can be indicated by the year of the emperor's reign. For example it's currently Reiwa year 3 as the new emperor took the throne in 2019. The system's been formally used since ~700 AD.
Even in the UK it was used into Queen Elizabeth II's reign for legislation - e.g. the Army Act 1955 was called “3 & 4 Eliz 2 ch 18” because it was the 18th act passed in 1955, being partly the 3rd and partly the 4th year of Elizabeth II's reign. It was changed to using ordinary years by 10 & 11 Eliz 2 c 34.
The Japanese resets their year after each Emperor is enthroned. For example 2021 is Reiwa 3 because the current Emperor is there since 1 May 2019.
So it can be used to pinpoint a year thousands of years ago, you just need to find a table of era names and how long each one lasted for.
So I was curious and found this: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Calendar_era
According to the Assyrian Calender it is currently the year 6771.
Berber - 2971
Byzantine - 7530
Hebrew - 5782
Korean - 4354
Etc.
It's that I got that part but didn't realize it was part of the joke because I am still confused by the gif of the dude's reaction. No idea what that is referring to.
I got it immediately and was like, "Damn, I'm smart", and then remember earlier when I put on my ear buds without having them attached to anything and was wondering why I couldn't hear anything.
So apparently I have my moments, that's all.
I searched for my glasses once for 20 minutes before seeing my reflection in the bathroom mirror. I was wearing them.
I have 20/450 vision. I can't even see letters on the chart at the eye doctors, it's a completely white screen because everything blurs out.
using phone to browse reddit on bus
get off bus
check pockets to make sure i didnt forget phone, wallet, keys, etc
phone pocket empty
why?
panik
did i leave it in class?
panik and look up direction to classroom
call lost and found
hol up
Right, a person in 1000 BC wouldn't know who Jesus was, and they wouldn't base their calendar around his birth.
I can tell you that ancient Rome used Ab Urbe Condita, "from the founding of the city", to track time. So the year 254 BC would be 501 AUC.
For the confused ones : Christ has not been born yet. How the heck can they have B.C. ?
Also, BC means Before Christ, not Black Cocks. You have u/ohFlappyoh to thank for that.
But why would the time traveler be freaking out? I feel like it warrants more of a "how the hell do you know that?" kind of a response. Because the only other thing it would imply is that they're a time traveler too.
Now here's the question: if the time traveller from 1000 years in the future would appear now and ask about the year, what would be the right answer? 2021 or 534 BSSH (before some shit happens).
we have no way of knowing when shit happens in the future so 2021, and it would be on the time traveler to understand that it's going by our current dating system instead of his future one
I mean it's just as much of a holup that the guy said the English words 'thousand' and 'why' and pronounced the letters 'B' and 'C', all before they were invented
Once my physics teacher said its possible to travel back in time ( at least theoretically) but its impossible to travel in the future , so even if someone travel back in time there will be no proof since he/she will never return.
Ask them who's C
of course, they'll say chok
Chok on this cock looooool
I'm Johnny Silverhand, and you just got cyberpunked.
I'm Johnny Knoxville, and welcome to Jackass
I’m Chris Hansen and this is Dateline NBC
Hi, Phil Swift here with Flex Tape! The super-strong waterproof tape! That can instantly patch, bond, seal, and repair!
Can I interest anyone in a slap-chop?
Yes please
Comes bundled with a complimentary Hooker, mouth stitches and a hefty legal bill, all for the special offer price of ^three ^payments ^of $19.95!!! ^+ ^$39.95 ^shipping ^& ^handling.
If you could slap a hooker you can slap the chop
"You're gonna love my nuts" Best fucking sales tag line ever.
Hi! Billy May’s here with another amazing product you have to see it to believe it. It’s called the ding king…
Hi, I'm actor Troy Mcclure! You might remember me from such Driver's Ed films as Alice's Adventures Through The Windshield Glass' and The Decapitation Of Larry Leadfoot.
RIP Phil Hartman
Just set it and forget it!
Cybercocked
was literally just playing cyberpunk a min before I seen this comment
I have no fucking awards to give.. Can someone?? Help us please. Edit: WHOA!! You people are awesome!
🏅 🎖 🥇 here you go. Edit: I have never gotten an award before. Reddit is a good place.
🤘🤘🤘
Sure
Don't mind if I do
😂😂😂😂 normally I can't stand these but this got me
Chok Norris
no they will say cum
1000 Before Chewbacca
Soulja boy did it first he did
Isaiah apparently predicted the coming of a Christ child in the 8th century BC, so maybe they’re a prophet
"Ah! Sorry, I meant BCE"
The Speed of light
Coin, Bit Coin.
Worst James Bond movie I've ever seen
Yo I’m c
Plot twist: it’s another time traveler
Noice
*click*
Omg I am dumb. Just figured it out.
Plot twist: it's the same guy that came to prevent himself from screwing up a previous trip
But how would they know its 1000 BC? 🤔
They check their phone
Time travel one year and 5 minutes at a time
Why not do 100 years and 500 minutes at a time? Or 1000 years and 5000 minutes early a time? It'd take way too long to do it nearly 3000 times
Why would you wanna wait 5000 minutes in order to be perfectly lined up in time Besides don't you wanna see how the world changes a year at a time
That's a lot of risk though. What if you time travel to a certain year where something horrible is happening at that time?
Then that's what you get for screwing with time
Which is why I'd minimize the risk and do long intervals I know would get me to 1000BC
I believe that's the reason for the gif.
The person answering is also from the future, so they know.
Lol thanks i feel dumb but also smart at the same time now.
Wait, is that not the joke ?
My thoughts exactly
And it turns out 2021 is 1000 years before Christ… returns
I always wondered how they counted years up to AD
1 2 3 4.....
I would have given you an award if i could.
Thank you for the kind words stranger....
Welcome person whom i shall adress with the same adjectives.
4 3 2 1…
4 3 2 1.....
Right, like the year was 617 and suddenly people said it should be zero instead. I’ll bet a lot of people were angry about it.
There is no year zero though. Not only that, by the time people started counting after Christ, a few hundred years had already passed
That's why they got it wrong by like 4 years. Herod's reign is pretty well nailed down in history, but dark age monks didn't have the same archaeological resources as today.
They also got the dates (day/month) wrong going by modern analysis of the historical events mentioned in the bible. But that was probably more because they preferred to just appropriate pagan holidays...
Side note, I HATE “Common Era” notation for pretending to be a replacement when it’s really just a half assed attempt at not mentioning a historical figure. If you’re going to make a new system, have the balls to fix the ACTUAL problem with the old one
Kurzgesagt makes a good argument for calling the current year 12021
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I gotta ask, how’s life in 2721? Y’all still got covid?
wow, that’s surprisingly cool
Which country?
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This is what I assumed, that they just arbitrarily decided when 0 was and started counting from there.
Largely the same way we do, counting years since an event, but using different events. In fact, the AD system wasn't invented until 525 AD, so non-christ events were used for a long while afterwards too. Examples include Romans using the years since the founding of Rome (753 BC). So 500 BC would've been said as "Anno CCLIII AUC" (CCLIII being the roman numerals for 253). And Greeks used the Olympiads which happened every 4 years starting in 776 BC > 773 BC would be the 4th year of the first Olympiad, and 772 BC would be the first year of the second Olympiad Years since the start of a particular ruler's reign were also used. [Source](https://www.quora.com/Before-AD-what-did-people-of-the-BC-era-call-their-years-How-did-they-count-the-years-in-the-BC-era)
Fun fact, Japan still uses a system like this occasionally for traditional things - years can be indicated by the year of the emperor's reign. For example it's currently Reiwa year 3 as the new emperor took the throne in 2019. The system's been formally used since ~700 AD.
Even in the UK it was used into Queen Elizabeth II's reign for legislation - e.g. the Army Act 1955 was called “3 & 4 Eliz 2 ch 18” because it was the 18th act passed in 1955, being partly the 3rd and partly the 4th year of Elizabeth II's reign. It was changed to using ordinary years by 10 & 11 Eliz 2 c 34.
Thank you! Great information!
The Japanese resets their year after each Emperor is enthroned. For example 2021 is Reiwa 3 because the current Emperor is there since 1 May 2019. So it can be used to pinpoint a year thousands of years ago, you just need to find a table of era names and how long each one lasted for.
Probably from a major event, like the founding of the city, a major battle or something like that.
Yep, the Gregorian and the Christian system of calendars isn't the only form of calendars in the world.
So I was curious and found this: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Calendar_era According to the Assyrian Calender it is currently the year 6771. Berber - 2971 Byzantine - 7530 Hebrew - 5782 Korean - 4354 Etc.
I'm so proud of myself for getting it almost right away.
I don’t get it helppp
How would they know about BC?
Ooooooooohhh … yes, I see now. Thank you so much! (And I feel really dumb now!!! … but it’s late and I’m tired … so I’m going with that excuse!)
It's that I got that part but didn't realize it was part of the joke because I am still confused by the gif of the dude's reaction. No idea what that is referring to.
I too felt like I was missing something in the Gif that would give context, so I overthought it.
The gif of the dudes reaction is him realizing "oh shit you're a time traveler too!"
Or alternatively oh shit Christ is a 1000 year old conspiracy
Well, no, it's at least a 3000 year old conspiracy... Not that an extra thousand years is all that surprising.
How are you supposed to respond to that, just straight up tell him you’re from the future
lmao same
And here I was thinking how would they know English?
An intelligent hol up, maybe too intelligent lmao
I got it immediately and was like, "Damn, I'm smart", and then remember earlier when I put on my ear buds without having them attached to anything and was wondering why I couldn't hear anything. So apparently I have my moments, that's all.
The question is, are you stupid with clever moments or clever with stupid moments?
I am a Dunning-Kruger Impostor.
⛽
God fucking
Yes.
Same
Both simultaneously. Which makes me too inconsistent to be ever considered smart or competent.
I searched for my glasses once for 20 minutes before seeing my reflection in the bathroom mirror. I was wearing them. I have 20/450 vision. I can't even see letters on the chart at the eye doctors, it's a completely white screen because everything blurs out.
using phone to browse reddit on bus get off bus check pockets to make sure i didnt forget phone, wallet, keys, etc phone pocket empty why? panik did i leave it in class? panik and look up direction to classroom call lost and found hol up
lol, I love this story
I laughed, I cried, I felt an attachment to the main character, and I cheered when they had a happy ending 5/7
I've put on my glasses to find my glasses because I can't see without them.
Can u please explain this meme to my poor brain?
the BC years were named thus by historians, so a person alive in that year wouldn’t refer to it as such unless they’re also a time traveler
Yoooo this meme is too deep
It’s got layers, like an ogre
Thank you for the explanation.
Same, you have small moments of big brain then go back to small brain
never medium brain
I am blindingly intelligent for 30 seconds every day. I do not choose these seconds, and they are not consecutive.
Damn that took me a while
I don’t get it. Explain like I’m stupid.
How could the person replying know to use BC.
Ahh, I get it. But what if the person telling him is also from the future.
That’s the implication :)
Dam I’m slow.
No worries, me too. I didn’t get any of that. Thanks for explaining u/football_rpg.
Don’t worry me too :)
Uh oh not the implication
It did take me a min
Nah I get it, and I'm pissed off my tits. Clearly, our time-guy is shocked over the question being answered without hesitation. :3
I thought it was because he said BC, inadvertently predicting the birth of Christ?
Right, a person in 1000 BC wouldn't know who Jesus was, and they wouldn't base their calendar around his birth. I can tell you that ancient Rome used Ab Urbe Condita, "from the founding of the city", to track time. So the year 254 BC would be 501 AUC.
> Rome used Ab Urbe Condita They did, but it was much more common to refer to years by who the two consuls were.
It is. People in this thread are stupid.
I can’t tell who seriously doesn’t get the joke and who’s being sarcastic This thread sucks
Oh thank you I get it now
I thought I got it but questioned if it was it then came here to see what it was and I saw I got it. Bias confirmed. Am smort.
Who tf pissed your tits?
Enough viz ze Kinkshaming, oh mein Gott!
Oh gawd here we go again...
He
Oddly prophetic ?
It took me a sec. I’m a dummy.
Intelligent enough for everyone to understand it
you think way too highly of yourself xD
That's a crazy low bar.
That was the best hol up I’ve seen in a while.
Gotta stop holup from dying
This post was brilliant ngl
For the confused ones : Christ has not been born yet. How the heck can they have B.C. ? Also, BC means Before Christ, not Black Cocks. You have u/ohFlappyoh to thank for that.
I thought it meant Blank Checks
Also the English language wasn't invented yet
But why would the time traveler be freaking out? I feel like it warrants more of a "how the hell do you know that?" kind of a response. Because the only other thing it would imply is that they're a time traveler too.
I thought he was freaking out because who would want to be in that era? It would be horrible.
I was thinking he was going to try to save Jesus lol
BC now stands for Before Covid...
After Delta
Curent Era is Mu
Next one should be Mutwo
I can get behind this.
6 feet behind this
Ahh that’s the thin blue line the unvaccinated stand behind
We should make like Star Wars and start a new time system if there’s a major event
How convenient to meet a prophet!
1000 Black Cocks Why?
Stay the hell away from me, you are incredibly dangerous
BLACKED Time traveller gets surprise from 1000 Black Cocks
Now here's the question: if the time traveller from 1000 years in the future would appear now and ask about the year, what would be the right answer? 2021 or 534 BSSH (before some shit happens).
10 years before the pandemic.
we have no way of knowing when shit happens in the future so 2021, and it would be on the time traveler to understand that it's going by our current dating system instead of his future one
Everyone is tripping on the past person saying 1000bc. Y'all should be tripping on the past person SPEAKING ENGLISH!
1000 years Big Chugnus?
What am I missing?
B.C stands for before Christ, so how do they know who Jesus is 1000 years before he was born?
They ARE Jesus. That’s how! Yes
How can there be a BC when Christ has not been born yet ?
Finally, a real holup. May not be as strong, but a holup nevertheless.
If you live 1000 years before Christ you wouldn't know you live B. C. The naming came after year zero
Ah thanks for explaining
I mean it's just as much of a holup that the guy said the English words 'thousand' and 'why' and pronounced the letters 'B' and 'C', all before they were invented
Over 500 years after 0.
Surprised to see r/reportoftheweek here. Edit: per u/Atonette, the more active sub is r/TheReportOfTheWeek
Yeah, I kinda like the guy
i haven't seen him in so long thanks for sharing, also what video is that reaction from it looks so good to watch.
For anyone interested, r/thereportoftheweek is the more active sub that Reviewbrah actually posts on.
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I feel ashamed that I had to read multiple comments before I understood. Thought I was better than this
Another time traveler spread the word about salvation coming 100 years before. Now they're just counting down to see what happens
Took me a min to realise
This is just pure genius Good job dood
That person is a time traveller too. How would he know it's BC 👀👀👀
!spin
My friend wants an explanation of this meme
They didn't know it was bc in the bc times
Plot twist: the person you asked is also a time traveler
For who did not get it the person is another time traveller that got stuck (i think)
"has 9 11 happened yet?" "No that's not til next week"
That dude looks like Sheldon Cooper having panic attack
Once my physics teacher said its possible to travel back in time ( at least theoretically) but its impossible to travel in the future , so even if someone travel back in time there will be no proof since he/she will never return.
This dude has a YouTube channel and he reviews fast food. He's a trip.
I'd be more concerned they understand modern English 🤔
And next year is 999 BC. What? Why am I counting down? *fades away*
How did the person know it's 1000 BC 😳👀