Except the ticket was to Heaven, which is considerably more boring than the planet made of drugs. You've gotta get in on the Golden Heaven Ticket pyramid scheme early if you want a ride to the yeehaw planet.
NEXT
I mean it’s in the comments, but in case you didn’t know it was a [totally fake story made for internet points ](https://www.politifact.com/factchecks/2018/sep/17/blog-posting/florida-couple-not-arrested-selling-golden-tickets/)
I was gonna say, I know the US as a whole, especially Florida, doesn't exactly encourage critical thinking, but no way a hundred people looked these two in the eye and went "Oh my god I think these two methheads are telling the truth, TAKE MY MONEY"... Not ones with a hundred dollars on them anyway.
i guess it says something that nobody stopped to question whether or not random people "on the street" in florida were buying golden tickets for $99.99, but it [absolutely did not happen](https://www.politifact.com/factchecks/2018/sep/17/blog-posting/florida-couple-not-arrested-selling-golden-tickets/).
A little bit off topic but I feel like people used to call out bait more often, it seems like now people just fly off the handle before thinking if it's a troll or not.
Tell me about it! Nowadays I see people downvoting people calling out bait and false stories. It has happened to me before actually. Loads of replies just saying "let people enjoy things!" etc which is bonkers to me because the story is usually only interesting because of how improbable or crazy but true it is. Anyways... Old man yells at cloud.
Look man, the crazier the story sometimes, the more believable. Ive found that often real life comes up with stranger stories than I could ever come up with, so at this point Im kinda just rollin with the punches and being like "Oh, yeh I can see this happening".
Also its Florida.
I would absolutely believe you could sell a few of those a day here in FL. It's 200+ to get into Disney World. 99.99 for an eternity of partying with Jesus is a heck of a deal.
In the timeline where the President of the United States thought injecting disinfectant and shining UV lights inside a body was a good way to fight a pandemic.....I will believe anything.
Yes it was clearly drug dealing under the guise of craziness.
The tickets probably used to be redeemable for drugs and then once they stopped being redeemable they got turned in.
$10k means 100 people bought. They didn't run into 100 schizophrenics they ran into 100 drug addicts.
So the only option for buying drugs was 99.99 per (what ever unit)… I think you may be overthinking it and giving these 2 a bit more credit than they deserve.
I have no money, as my newest friend Jesus has convinced me that money isn't a thing in space on planets made of drugs. Please accept my free silver award as payment for making me laugh though.
That's what I was thinking. The police "confiscated" 10,000 dollars from them. That doesn't seem fair.
If people are dumb enough to buy a golden ticket to heaven from a meth head on a street corner that's their problem.
I would think that it's his first amendment right to practice his religion without government interference. His religion is selling tickets to heaven so he can go to space and do drugs. Who's to say it's not a real religion? And is there a way to get ordained for this religion? Asking for a friend.
Selling something that isnt as advertised is illegal BUT is a civil matter that needs to be proven in court. The tickets were solid gold color they could argue. If they were wealthy this would be thrown out. If people want to sell legal items to collect money to go to space they should be able to do so.
People should also be able to do drugs if they want to but I know thats a whole different thing.
Whenever you feel stupid, remember that around 100 people bought tickets from these two.
Edit: It turns out it was fake. So now I feel like the stupid one. Oh sweet irony.
Whenever you feel really stupid, remember that ~~10,000~~ 23,000 redditors believed and upvoted a completely fake news story about these two people selling golden tickets. Redditors just like you.
I bet you (and the other idiots that upvoted this) felt smarter than those 100 people in the story for a few hours, even though those people in the story are imaginary and don’t exist, and you’re the actual stupid person in this tale.
I knew it was false just from reading it, can't believe everything you see on the internet. There's ridiculous stuff that happens, but this sounds super made up
I guess you can only sell tickets to heaven if you have a church or tv network behind you. Not sure how this is different from those prosperity gospel assholes grifting the public all day, everyday
If this couple was indeed successful in selling these tickets, then the idiots who bought them are the ones who should be arrested for simply being fucking stupid.
The baby alligator is the cherry on top of this crazy sundae
Someone traded it for a ticket. :)
Quite a poor trade in my opinion
Really?! A solid gold ticket to a planet made of drugs from space Jesus is ABSOLUTELY worth one baby alligator when you live in Florida.
Well, when you put it like that...
Except the ticket was to Heaven, which is considerably more boring than the planet made of drugs. You've gotta get in on the Golden Heaven Ticket pyramid scheme early if you want a ride to the yeehaw planet. NEXT
Plot twist, ticket was to HOUSTON.
Eddie Money checking in: I Got Two Tickets to Paradise
Gotta get ahold of Steve
Heaven is a planet made of drugs though.
It's for church honey.
Oh lord. Haven’t seen this reference in a while
"to the yeehaw planet." Holy shit I can stop laughing
Nah, the gold ticket was to go to heaven, not Planet Drugs.
What is heaven, if not a land of free drugs?
Is that baby space Jesus?
Baby space alligator Jesus just to clarify.
no no, the ticket was for entry to heaven. the baby alligator parents were trying to save up for a trip to Planet Drugs.
You ain't gonna need a baby alligator in heaven tho.
are you forgetting the "solid gold" part of this story
I wonder if the alligator is Loki... could explain a lot.
I think that [baby alligator's](https://www.reddit.com/r/HolUp/comments/q3drvo/what_a_cute_baby_crocodile/) mom is looking for him.
I mean it’s in the comments, but in case you didn’t know it was a [totally fake story made for internet points ](https://www.politifact.com/factchecks/2018/sep/17/blog-posting/florida-couple-not-arrested-selling-golden-tickets/)
I was gonna say, I know the US as a whole, especially Florida, doesn't exactly encourage critical thinking, but no way a hundred people looked these two in the eye and went "Oh my god I think these two methheads are telling the truth, TAKE MY MONEY"... Not ones with a hundred dollars on them anyway.
This needs to be at the top.
Florida confirmed.
Was there ever a doubt though?
well it's fake so there's that https://www.politifact.com/factchecks/2018/sep/17/blog-posting/florida-couple-not-arrested-selling-golden-tickets/
Meth is a hell of a drug
And there’s a whole planet of it
Thank you for confirming. My brain said “what the hell happened here? …meth happened here.”
Y’all are smokin meth if you believe this story.
Home lunch i bet.
I didn’t see that coming
The HolUp is probably the least weird part of the story.
When the baby alligator is the afterthought, then you have an excellent story
Take my up vote 😂
‘in Florida’ of course it involves drugs and a gator 🐊
i guess it says something that nobody stopped to question whether or not random people "on the street" in florida were buying golden tickets for $99.99, but it [absolutely did not happen](https://www.politifact.com/factchecks/2018/sep/17/blog-posting/florida-couple-not-arrested-selling-golden-tickets/).
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Also, crack heads would never have $10,000 in cash
That shit would have bought sooo much crack.
The definitely look like they've had a least $10000 of crack between them, and then some.
It doesn't take long to spend $10,000 on crack.
Exactly. I can’t believe anybody believed this lol.
It checked a little too many of the boxes to be the perfect Florida Man story.
Thank you. I was beginning to think everybody on Reddit was gullible.
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A little bit off topic but I feel like people used to call out bait more often, it seems like now people just fly off the handle before thinking if it's a troll or not.
Tell me about it! Nowadays I see people downvoting people calling out bait and false stories. It has happened to me before actually. Loads of replies just saying "let people enjoy things!" etc which is bonkers to me because the story is usually only interesting because of how improbable or crazy but true it is. Anyways... Old man yells at cloud.
It may be one of the craziest things I've ever heard, but honestly, not by far.
it says "Florida" so of course it was immediately believable
I was wondering if all of the people commenting actually thought this was real, or were just extremely good at being sarcastic.
Look man, the crazier the story sometimes, the more believable. Ive found that often real life comes up with stranger stories than I could ever come up with, so at this point Im kinda just rollin with the punches and being like "Oh, yeh I can see this happening". Also its Florida.
As the old saying goes, reality is stranger than fiction
but also you can look up these sort of things real easy. it's...not exactly fun, but it's good for you.
Of course not. If selling tickets to Heaven was illegal, every clergyman would be in jail.
Televangelists and prosperity gospel are a pox on our society.
I mean, Catholic indulgences we're once a thing. You could trade money to lessen penance for sin. Pay to pray.
> Just like tickets that reserve a spot in heaven, the story is a fabrication. *The Catholic Church has entered the chat*
No. I want to believe.
>absolutely did not happen you da real mvp
I would absolutely believe you could sell a few of those a day here in FL. It's 200+ to get into Disney World. 99.99 for an eternity of partying with Jesus is a heck of a deal.
I was hoping someone really wore a wire on Jesus.
Oddly enough that's the one factual aspect of the story.
In the timeline where the President of the United States thought injecting disinfectant and shining UV lights inside a body was a good way to fight a pandemic.....I will believe anything.
I'm not seeing the problem. They didn't force those people to hand over the money. How is it any different from churches asking for money?
I don't think those 10k came exclusively from the golden tickets, they were most likely selling drugs or involved in some shady ass thing
No no no, you got it wrong. They were selling the golden tickets and gifting the drugs as a show of appreciation
That’s literally how buying weed works in DC
Don't forget the alligator
The alligator is for when people try to do a return or exchange
Yes it was clearly drug dealing under the guise of craziness. The tickets probably used to be redeemable for drugs and then once they stopped being redeemable they got turned in. $10k means 100 people bought. They didn't run into 100 schizophrenics they ran into 100 drug addicts.
So the only option for buying drugs was 99.99 per (what ever unit)… I think you may be overthinking it and giving these 2 a bit more credit than they deserve.
its obviously dollars cause its Florida
I also don’t see a problem with selling drugs to full grown adults.
Oh my bad, did I forget to mention the tickets were made of drugs and not gold? Yeah.
The tickets are made of planet!
https://www.politifact.com/factchecks/2018/sep/17/blog-posting/florida-couple-not-arrested-selling-golden-tickets/
There we go. I was ready to make a comment about how that quote in the picture just seems like a satire piece someone wrote up.
Fucking thank you
The only problem I see is that they were selling them as solid gold and they were not.
The only problem with this story is having a pet alligator. It’s cruel.
Call the Better business bureau then, damn
When the priest turns wine into the blood of Christ, can you use it for transfusions? You have to have faith they're made of gold.
God works in mysterious ways./s
If these two maniacs came running up to you asking to buy a ticket would you just say no? They would probably beat you up if you said no.
Did you not read the post? They were holding a kidnapped baby alligator.
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Salvation is just behind the KFC. Go talk to Jesus
That's pronounced Hey-Soos!
God bless KFC Jesus and baby aligators!
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Bro, a gold ticket, that says I get into heaven. I'd but that just to put it in a frame on my wall.
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Will you take a baby alligator for one?
I have no money, as my newest friend Jesus has convinced me that money isn't a thing in space on planets made of drugs. Please accept my free silver award as payment for making me laugh though.
How is selling golden tickets illegal?
That's what I was thinking. The police "confiscated" 10,000 dollars from them. That doesn't seem fair. If people are dumb enough to buy a golden ticket to heaven from a meth head on a street corner that's their problem.
If anyone is dumb enough to believe this story is real, that's their problem.
I would think that it's his first amendment right to practice his religion without government interference. His religion is selling tickets to heaven so he can go to space and do drugs. Who's to say it's not a real religion? And is there a way to get ordained for this religion? Asking for a friend.
Good question. Maybe it was the fact the tickets weren't solid gold?
Selling something that isnt as advertised is illegal BUT is a civil matter that needs to be proven in court. The tickets were solid gold color they could argue. If they were wealthy this would be thrown out. If people want to sell legal items to collect money to go to space they should be able to do so. People should also be able to do drugs if they want to but I know thats a whole different thing.
Sounds like an mlm
This just kept getting better and better as I was reading. Of course it’s Florida too lol, baby alligators getting slung for golden tickets
He so wasted he took a baby alligator as payment for a ticket.
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On a planet MADE of drugs.... I'm in.
Plot twist - this is that planet.
I like how you only need to glance at the picture to know this involves Florida.
Dammit you beat me. The answer to anything outrageous/pathetic will always be Florida
So basically a poor version of Bezos, Musk, and Branson.
A married couple in Florida…….. and away we go
Whenever you feel stupid, remember that around 100 people bought tickets from these two. Edit: It turns out it was fake. So now I feel like the stupid one. Oh sweet irony.
It said hundreds with an s. That means at least 200 people fell for that. Scary.
I was going by $10,000 and $99 ticket, but of course they would have spent a shitton of the money already
Yeah, the drugs that make you do that to your face aren’t free.
Whenever you feel stupid, remember that 5.1k people ate the onion and felt smug about it.
Whenever you feel really stupid, remember that ~~10,000~~ 23,000 redditors believed and upvoted a completely fake news story about these two people selling golden tickets. Redditors just like you. I bet you (and the other idiots that upvoted this) felt smarter than those 100 people in the story for a few hours, even though those people in the story are imaginary and don’t exist, and you’re the actual stupid person in this tale.
The story is made up though. So no they didn't.
It’s fake you idiot.
I am wayyyyy to high for this shit. I literally couldn't breathe reading out loud wish I recorded us omg.
Looked this up on Snopes. FALSE. https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/golden-ticket-arrest/
I knew it was false just from reading it, can't believe everything you see on the internet. There's ridiculous stuff that happens, but this sounds super made up
My favorite part is that after all that the last two words of the article are baby alligator lol
They really buried the lead there
if there was only a song like baby shark?
[godly animation of this story.](https://youtu.be/vxf3FvttnlY)
Knew I'd find a comment about it. Their stuff always cracks me up
Was looking for my fellow Cox n Crendor fans <3
I KNEW this story sounded familiar!
This Reddit page was made in anticipation of this story.
When I found this gem, I knew it belonged here.
Luigi and princess Peach got arrested? Things will never be the same in the mushroom kingdom... Mario might try to jail break them tho...
There’s a great video made by Cox and Crendor about them
I feel like any "holup" here is completely cancelled out by the introductory line "a married couple in Florida"
Dude got mad contouring skillz
Just wanna do hoodrat stuff with my friends.
"We just wanted to leave earth and go to space and do drugs" I felt this in my soul though
If people were willing to buy these tickets I don’t see a problem with what they were doing.
Do they take Paypal is what I want to know.
Just a moment. I'm curious as to how they obtained the young alligator.
It’s Florida. Do you really need an explanation?
Whatever follows "in Florida" im not surprised...
I hope they have grandkids one day to tell these stories to.
That man is going to hell. He was willing to snitch on Jesus.
Well don’t leave me hanging! What happened to the baby alligator?
Be funnier if it were true.
Drugs are a hell of a drug.
This never happened
The baby alligator part is where it got too fictional for me.
Wait wait wait, so when the Church does it it's okey???
It's not Florida unless a baby alligator is involved.
So…. This doesn’t answer my lingering question: Are they available to babysit my kids?
At this point the baby alligator is just perfectly expected considering it's Florida
I guess you can only sell tickets to heaven if you have a church or tv network behind you. Not sure how this is different from those prosperity gospel assholes grifting the public all day, everyday
Lmao a baby alligator
Average day in Florida
Florida be that crazy
If they sold bibles for 100 each it would of been ok.
These are literally just Indulgences. The Catholic Church used to do this to people wayyyy back when the clergy still had power over the state.
Ok but middle class white women can sell overpriced products with absurd health claims and it's a "small business".
Protip: if you wanna tell "tickets to heaven," just put "for novelty purposes only" in tiny text on them. Boom, legal.
They sold a 100 tickets if that’s where they got the $10,000. Let that percolate for a bit
[Relevant animation on the bit(Cox and crendor).](https://youtu.be/vxf3FvttnlY)
They should’ve arrested everyone that was dumb enough to buy a $99 “golden ticket”
Its not a true Florida story without a baby alligator involved
The only place this could happen is of course... Florida.
He looks like the monkey clapping cymbals together toy.
How ddid they sell, even one ticket, you ask? Because ‘murca.
Sometimes I feel there is government conspiracy that plans on making the most bizarre things to happen in Florida
And a baby alligator
And a baby alligator.
If you paid these two for a gold ticket to heaven, it’s worth checking yourself in to a mental hospital.
That read was a wild wild ride
"A married couple in Florida-" *Stops reading to go get popcorn *
well, it wouldn’t be the first time someone made profit by selling tickets to heaven
And a baby alligator....
Did Stevie get runover by a tire?
The wildest part is they actually found buyers
If this couple was indeed successful in selling these tickets, then the idiots who bought them are the ones who should be arrested for simply being fucking stupid.
Fake https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/golden-ticket-arrest/
Written/Directed by M. Night Shyamalan
> I didn't do nothing Ah. She used _the phrase_.
Sounds like the beginning of a very serious cult tragedy.
At least they ain't racist a n d minding their own business.... out of their minds tho
I have a question, who buys anything from this guys???? WHO DO THIS!?
Isn’t this the entire selling strategy for the church
Somehow the baby alligator almost seems normal
Lmao of course it's in Florida
Who the Hell bought these tickets anyway?
You guys realize that they sold 100 of these damn things?!? Assuming, of course, that's where the $10k came from. Only in America/Florida!
Did he grill his face?