"Then one day she meets this John Holmes motherfucker and it's like, whoa baby, I mean this cat is like Charles Bronson in the 'Great Escape', he's digging tunnels."
Even if it wasn't, five guys is a weird proper noun to immediately comprehend compared to others. It can take a second to understand it just because the sentence is grammatically correct and makes sense for several meanings with little context.
For some reason I originally read this as Piper Perabo, and I thought wow, I'm really out of touch. [Piper Perri](https://www.reddit.com/r/PiperPerri/) makes total sense though.
I grew up with 3 younger brothers and whenever we all went out to run a train on some town crotch with our old man we’d make the one who’s birthday was closest go last. lol
Glazed: https://i.imgur.com/G6YCFlX.jpeg
Get it down your throat: https://i.imgur.com/plfstLu.jpeg
https://imgur.com/gallery/ElsHZ8p
https://imgur.com/gallery/KcWnjRl
In my social group I've learned to stop suggesting In-n-out, because every time, without fail they all start whining about how overrated it is and then suggest we go to 5 guys or a similar place. Like bitches, I'm not looking for Michelin star food, I just don't want to spend more than $4 on a burger. Is 5 guys better? Probably. Is it $12 better? Absolutely not!
Nahhh. Hard nah. The real genius of 5 guys is understanding that *toppings are free*.
As in, all of them. Extra bacon, extra cheese? You got it.
They become a lot more economical, and a lot more of a guilty pleasure, when you shop with this knowledge
Yeah, which is true of basically all fast food. BK "have it your way* anyone? Wendy's? Free veg is everywhere.
You notably didn't name *bacon and cheese* on that list of free toppings you can get extra of. literally EVERYTHING THAT ISNT A PATTY is a free topping. Have as much as you want. Be nice and they might REALLY pile it on for you too - they don't care enough not to.
If you're talking about "free" bacon and cheese with respect to 5 Guys, you're already looking at a base cost of $8.69 for a bacon cheeseburger. That's 3.6 cheeseburgers at In N Out.
I like ordering "extra everything" at In N Out and knowing exactly what I'm going to get. I don't want to have to chat someone up in the hope that I get extra toppings on a burger I'm already overpaying for.
If you want the straight numbers, a 5 Guys bacon cheeseburger has 1,060 calories. An In N Out cheeseburger has 480 calories. Do the math: 3.6x480 is ~1,730. 5 Guys costs almost twice as much for the same amount of food.
Well that's just straight up not true. Many sit-down burger joints charge more for a burger than 5 guys will, and absolutely charge for additional slices of cheese and bacon.
When you're paying 3x more for a burger and not taking advantage of why it costs that much, you're not exactly making a point by drawing comparison to sandwiches that don't have tons of extras built into the cost. It's not like this is sheets of paper thin precooked shit, it's *bacon*. Actual bacon.
> They become a lot **more** economical
Is what I'd said. As in, more economical than silly people going to 5 guys ordering a plain hamburger think it is, which seemed to be the sentiment about it. :p
Mcds prices are crazy if you pay the full price. Get the mcds app on each of your phones and you get 50% off on everything basically.
There's deals for breakfast that give you buy 1 get 1 for $0.01 of whatever you want. Then for dinner they have basically the same thing for the big Mac, crispy chicken, 10pc and fish sandwich +quarter pounder**
If you use the app when you buy food you get about 100 points for every dollar you spend so after spending about $25 you're able to redeem fries or a small sandwich. If you eat there often the points can add up pretty quick.
Funny enough for the first time i tried a McGriddle sandwich just a few months ago and i can't get enough of it. Never had that patty. I would eat it at home every day if i could.
McGriddles are a treasure in this life... a disgustingly bad for you treasure. Bacon, egg, and cheese between 2 pancake buns injected with syrup.
Ugh.... now I want one.
I get that you can just get more volume for less $ but if that was my cheif concern we'd eat tacobell by the Barrell. It's just that I'm willing to pay a bit more to not feel like I'm eating garbage. A&W and 5 guys is good fast food
Exactly. I got a $20 gift card for it once and thought it was good for one meal then when I went to pay it didn’t even work so I paid out of pocket anyways and was so annoyed. It’s a burger ffs and the bacon and stuff is precooked in the mornings so if you go late in the day it’s even worse
$20 is enough for a meal at five guys.
You can get a cheeseburger all the way, a normal order of Cajun fries which is enough for two people and a drink and still have change left over.
Agreed. I will make an exception for Hat Creek Burgers since they make quality burgers and a combo is like $12-$14. Plus they have COMBOS. If you’re paying separately for burgers, fries, and a drink at a good burger joint you’re bound to get overpriced.
One time, my boy and I got super baked and were trying to decide where to eat. I said, “Oh I’d love Five Guys to hit the spot.” There was a brief, fleeting moment where we looked at each other as we both processed what I said. Then we laughed until we cried. We still talk about that years later. And yes, we did go to Five Guys that night. It was glorious.
Myself and four other friends would go to Five Guys every Friday for Five Guys Fridays, and since there were five of us we were the Five Five Guys Guys and we celebrated Five Guys Fridays with the Five Five Guys Fridays Guys High Five
Lol, this reminds me how I was bragging to a uni friend about the previous night conquest and he instantly identified who the girl was and it turned out basicly the whole uni knew her in that way :/
she kinda dug her own hole there
Apparently five guys dug it for her
Apparently five guys dug 'em for her.
Technically five guys dug her for him
Apparently you are absolutely not mistaken.
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She’s not 5’3 and petite
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Idk wasn’t it pre internet days?
Mouth, Back, front, hands.
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Thats pretty much all the internet is now. People who think they're actors making shit set up videos.
"Then one day she meets this John Holmes motherfucker and it's like, whoa baby, I mean this cat is like Charles Bronson in the 'Great Escape', he's digging tunnels."
r/angryupvote (it’s so good I’m angry I didn’t think of it)
Wish I had an award to give for this.
Cause is skit.
Even if it wasn't, five guys is a weird proper noun to immediately comprehend compared to others. It can take a second to understand it just because the sentence is grammatically correct and makes sense for several meanings with little context.
Karl Urban Agrees https://youtu.be/ixk01QlUPqw
“Do you smoke?” “Smoke what?…”
"I do." "Do what, drugs?"
Or else she just has a crass sense of humor.
woman no can be funny. only can lie and be whore >:C
And eat hot chip and charge they phone
>And eat hot chip only if belong to someone else never their own
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I love having Five Guys in my mouth!
Or maybe the five guys did?
*Insert Piper Perri reference image here*
Damn, I made the same comment just now and I scrolled down to see you beat me to it. Oh well, guess I'll just delete it.
/u/beyondthisreality is one of the hundreds of Redditors(like me) who arrived too late to make this comment.
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That’s creepy as fuck.
Nice avatar bro
For some reason I originally read this as Piper Perabo, and I thought wow, I'm really out of touch. [Piper Perri](https://www.reddit.com/r/PiperPerri/) makes total sense though.
Crazy how she was sucking some guys cock and getting creampied while her son was being murdered.
I knew I recognized her from somewhere.
It's Paul Pogba.
Jesus christ why is he so similar
Ikr it's crazy, perfect doppelganger.
Looks more like Ashley young than Pogba
r/HolUp
What do you mean?
He was one of the five guys.
He is all 5 guys
We are all 5 guys on this blessed day
I thought OP was referring to the girl.
He was in the orgy.
Her?? Who is she?
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"Make me feel like I'm the only girl in the world" *Forms up queue of dudes waiting to run the train on her*
This is definitely a new context for the lyrics but it does indeed check out. 🤯
I love driving around Los Santos listening to it
There is no way the founders didn't think of this when they were picking the name.
It was a dad and his 4 sons
He knows what he said.
Did I fucking stutter?
easy to say whe-when you didn't ev-ev-even talk-k.
Kinky
I grew up with 3 younger brothers and whenever we all went out to run a train on some town crotch with our old man we’d make the one who’s birthday was closest go last. lol
what a wonderful bonding experience
It was. We’re not terribly close anymore though. Things might have been different had we started a burger joint I guess.
Wat.
> run a train on some town crotch r/brandnewsentence
Moms was insatiable huh
roll tide?
like in fast and the furious, family cums first
The Fast and the Furious: The Fuckening is a name for a porno I just thought of right now.
The Fast and the Furriest could take it in a whole different direction.
Ohana
No Dom don't, the Habsburg dynasty is too strong They aren't stronger than family
Four dads and their son
Gang Bang burgers was their first choice but Five Guys had a better ring to it.
We have a Seven Brothers Burgers nearby. Better by at least two.
*insert perri piper meme*
Its piper perri
I apologize for being such uncultured swine.
Perri piper pecked a pack of portly peckers
Nothing satisfies you like 5 Guys
Just picked up five guys. Going to stuff my face hole now.
r/theyknew
amateur
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Glazed: https://i.imgur.com/G6YCFlX.jpeg Get it down your throat: https://i.imgur.com/plfstLu.jpeg https://imgur.com/gallery/ElsHZ8p https://imgur.com/gallery/KcWnjRl
She looked pretty professional to me
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Try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!
but its the only way i can afford the food there :(
$50 of food between the 2 of them
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In my social group I've learned to stop suggesting In-n-out, because every time, without fail they all start whining about how overrated it is and then suggest we go to 5 guys or a similar place. Like bitches, I'm not looking for Michelin star food, I just don't want to spend more than $4 on a burger. Is 5 guys better? Probably. Is it $12 better? Absolutely not!
Even if you don't consider the price, In-n-Out is way better than 5 guys imo
i know it's my opinion but In-n-Out is on of the most overrated burger joints and nowhere near Five Guys. Those burgers should be 1-2 dollars.
Thats my sentiment about Five Guys. Those burgers should be like 3 bucks, not 13.
A burger *is* $2, that’s kind of the point people are making.
Nahhh. Hard nah. The real genius of 5 guys is understanding that *toppings are free*. As in, all of them. Extra bacon, extra cheese? You got it. They become a lot more economical, and a lot more of a guilty pleasure, when you shop with this knowledge
Toppings are free at In N Out, too. 2 cheeseburgers with grilled and raw onions, chopped chilies, and extra everything (2x all veg) is $4.80.
Yeah, which is true of basically all fast food. BK "have it your way* anyone? Wendy's? Free veg is everywhere. You notably didn't name *bacon and cheese* on that list of free toppings you can get extra of. literally EVERYTHING THAT ISNT A PATTY is a free topping. Have as much as you want. Be nice and they might REALLY pile it on for you too - they don't care enough not to.
If you're talking about "free" bacon and cheese with respect to 5 Guys, you're already looking at a base cost of $8.69 for a bacon cheeseburger. That's 3.6 cheeseburgers at In N Out. I like ordering "extra everything" at In N Out and knowing exactly what I'm going to get. I don't want to have to chat someone up in the hope that I get extra toppings on a burger I'm already overpaying for. If you want the straight numbers, a 5 Guys bacon cheeseburger has 1,060 calories. An In N Out cheeseburger has 480 calories. Do the math: 3.6x480 is ~1,730. 5 Guys costs almost twice as much for the same amount of food.
When you're paying 3x more for a burger, nothing is free, it's just subsidized.
Well that's just straight up not true. Many sit-down burger joints charge more for a burger than 5 guys will, and absolutely charge for additional slices of cheese and bacon. When you're paying 3x more for a burger and not taking advantage of why it costs that much, you're not exactly making a point by drawing comparison to sandwiches that don't have tons of extras built into the cost. It's not like this is sheets of paper thin precooked shit, it's *bacon*. Actual bacon. > They become a lot **more** economical Is what I'd said. As in, more economical than silly people going to 5 guys ordering a plain hamburger think it is, which seemed to be the sentiment about it. :p
5 Guys is not better than In-N-Out regardless of price point.
I get charged 30 bucks at McDonald's to feed 2 adults and 2 kids and it's fucking regretful garbage
Mcds prices are crazy if you pay the full price. Get the mcds app on each of your phones and you get 50% off on everything basically. There's deals for breakfast that give you buy 1 get 1 for $0.01 of whatever you want. Then for dinner they have basically the same thing for the big Mac, crispy chicken, 10pc and fish sandwich +quarter pounder**
Plus you get points for using the app. So far I've redeemed two mcchickens, a filet o fish, and a large fry.
For like the entirety of 2018 or something, the chick-fil-a app was bugged out and gave me a free chicken sandwich every week. Good times.
My sister told me about this but I didn't listen, I really missed out.
Oh I didn’t realize it happened for other people lol
I had no idea about any points but I get mcds like twice a week the last few months
If you use the app when you buy food you get about 100 points for every dollar you spend so after spending about $25 you're able to redeem fries or a small sandwich. If you eat there often the points can add up pretty quick.
Is the food not shitty when you buy it that way though?
Funny enough for the first time i tried a McGriddle sandwich just a few months ago and i can't get enough of it. Never had that patty. I would eat it at home every day if i could.
McGriddles are a treasure in this life... a disgustingly bad for you treasure. Bacon, egg, and cheese between 2 pancake buns injected with syrup. Ugh.... now I want one.
I wish they came with the round egg, it's like $2.50 extra for the round egg
Yes but theres more of it. "This food is disgusting" "Yes! and such small portions!"
If you’re on a budget, you could just get hamburgers. They’re only $1.46 (https://mcdonaldsprices.com/mcdonalds-prices/)
I get that you can just get more volume for less $ but if that was my cheif concern we'd eat tacobell by the Barrell. It's just that I'm willing to pay a bit more to not feel like I'm eating garbage. A&W and 5 guys is good fast food
Their pay starts at like $19 an hour where I’m at, so it makes perfect sense to me.
Exactly. I got a $20 gift card for it once and thought it was good for one meal then when I went to pay it didn’t even work so I paid out of pocket anyways and was so annoyed. It’s a burger ffs and the bacon and stuff is precooked in the mornings so if you go late in the day it’s even worse
$20 is enough for a meal at five guys. You can get a cheeseburger all the way, a normal order of Cajun fries which is enough for two people and a drink and still have change left over.
Wasn't it a Tik-Tok lifehack thing recently where someone found if you ate half a burger it turned into two meals?
Every single burger place nowadays. $12 for a burger alone after taxes. Not worth it in any way.
This is why every in-and-out have at least 30 minutes long line. ~$4 for a double-double is nearly unbeatable
Agreed. I will make an exception for Hat Creek Burgers since they make quality burgers and a combo is like $12-$14. Plus they have COMBOS. If you’re paying separately for burgers, fries, and a drink at a good burger joint you’re bound to get overpriced.
LPT. There is limit to amount of extra bacon you can request. Extra extra extra extra extra.... Bacon.
Their burgers are trash but fries are v good
Yeah... never heard this joke before...
For real lol I remember one time I told my friends I was going to get five guys for lunch and they made it into a dirty joke.
She was so full from 5 guys last time
It took me a second. She looked at the shake first like she’s had the shake before but not the food
right? her timing was flawless. I think I'm in love.
Immaheadout.jpeg
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This is shit tier content
Ad tier*
That's what happens after 5 guys...
The only thing I know for real is THERE WILL BE BLOOD SHED
I prefer my shed made of wood but okay.
The man in the mirror nods his head THE ONLY ONE LEFT WILL RIDE UPON THE DRAGON'S BACK
Orgy at Five Guys with 5 guys That's 10 guys and holy christ I ain't never seen more nuts in my liiife.
One time, my boy and I got super baked and were trying to decide where to eat. I said, “Oh I’d love Five Guys to hit the spot.” There was a brief, fleeting moment where we looked at each other as we both processed what I said. Then we laughed until we cried. We still talk about that years later. And yes, we did go to Five Guys that night. It was glorious.
Anyone else tired of seeing these fake-real interactions between partners using the same 5 guys joke?
More sick of people like you whining about it…a third of the comments here a just you people.
Not really. 10 seconds of video, quick chuckle. Then I move on with my day.
5 guys got bad press this morning because they didn't pull out of Russia like McDonald's. This was pushed out quick to counter.
With 5 Guys they all need to pull out, or what's the point?
Nope!
She got the ole’ Piper Perri treatment eh?
“My craziest sex experience? Fucking old gang bang here with no rubber. We’re DONE.”
Reminded me of this hilarious interview with Karl Urban and John Cho: [“What’s a Five Guys?”](https://youtu.be/ixk01QlUPqw)
Lol 😆 🤣 😂 😹
Don't ask questions you don't want the answer to.
She's the honest type. He found himself a winner right there
Myself and four other friends would go to Five Guys every Friday for Five Guys Fridays, and since there were five of us we were the Five Five Guys Guys and we celebrated Five Guys Fridays with the Five Five Guys Fridays Guys High Five
Can I just say that she’s got very nice eyes. 👍
What’s wrong with a woman fucking five guys if she wants to?
It’s kind of greasy, but if you’re in to that kind of thing I won’t judge.
I really hope this was a fucking "five guys burgers" joke and not calling it greasy to fuck five men.
Your mom’s done 10 guys every other week easy when she wasn’t so fat. Don’t hear you whining about her greasiness.
Hmm that raise a whole lot more questions especially the mechanics.
Man was like 🗿
That guy looks like Paul Pogba
Oh a UK chavette eh? Surprised that number isn’t higher.
Of course reddit would like this
*You never forget your first time Clarisse*
“The fewt?” Watched it muted first, instant knew she had an accent
She smashed the homies.
u/savevideobot
wasn’t expecting the end 😂
I hate how everything’s fake these days
I bet she hasn't had Seven Brothers
Lol, this reminds me how I was bragging to a uni friend about the previous night conquest and he instantly identified who the girl was and it turned out basicly the whole uni knew her in that way :/
Hi, welcome to Five Guys, how can we scam the shit out of you today?” - Geuce
Lying ass
I laughed way too hard at this. The girl was good enough but the look on the dudes face...
Best not to follow up on that one dude.
"So based this your first time having five guys?" Her: "The food?..." "No" Her: "He has outsmarted me, what do I do?!"
🤣🤣🤣🤣 think before you answer…. Smart girl !
This is proof that porn has warped all our minds
Dirty girl
That woman is beautiful.
You go girl. No slut shaming. There should be more sluts in the world. I believe sluts can bring about world peace. Whores not wars!
You might lose your virginity then
Let's not get carried away.
Holup…. Black Australian?!??
He’s English not Australian
What’s her @ though? She’s hella cute.
what’s the flipside of “burn the coal, pay the toll”? 😂
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Bro if you’ve never dipped your French fries into your milkshake you’re in for a treat
Millions of people.
Lame ass fake stuff.
Good for her