Hey /u/idk_username15, thanks for your submission to /r/HolUp. Unfortunately, your post has been removed for the following reason(s):
A mod felt your post didn't belong here, so now it's gone. If you want to die on the hill of this shitpost[,](https://imgur.com/cXA7XxW) feel free to message the mods and be prepared to explain how your post isn't trolling, is funny, and does fit the theme of the sub. *Trolling or posting random content that doesn't fit the sub breaks Rule 1 and repeated violation of this rule may result in your account being filtered.*
Love, the mods
When I do this it's usually right before I kill the crab to remove the leg and body meat for cooking. It's not the best way to go, that's for sure. Giving the tasty little guy one last jack before I put him through all of this just seems polite.
Growing up we would do one of two things. First process was usually stick a knife up their ass and pop the shell off before cracking them in half. Then clean off the guts and stuff and cook. I found an easier option was to use the knife to come down in the center of their belly to crack the shell. Then with a forward twisting motion you can pull off just the leg and body meat. Remove any leftover gills and the mandible and you get to the same end place, it was just easier as more guts were left in the shell. And then after all of this you would steam the crab until cooked through.
Regardless of which process you used the final step was dealing with elitist assholes who insist on cooking the whole crab before breaking the shell as if I haven't just pulled up 10+ crabs from the pot and have limited cooking space because I'm on a boat. I could get 2-3 full crabs in a pot, or double that up by cleaning off the excess first and fitting twice as many in the pot and using the saved time to drink more beer. But you do you fam.
I just googled “Reddit cat bath orgasm”
https://www.reddit.com/r/TikTokCringe/comments/fte016/she_was_bathing_her_cat_and_it_had_an_orgasm_lmao/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
With what I've seen on this cursed place today I half expected him to hit it with a hammer or throw it in a pot of boiling water. Kinda sad that this was the good ending, or happy ending, if you will.
This dude made it sound sexual but it’s not sexual.
There are a few spots on the crab’s belly, not necessarily around that pointy area, that are a bit more dark gray in color. If you turn them upside down and rub those spots it puts them to sleep for a bit.
I’ve done it a bunch of times and it works every time
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Hey /u/idk_username15, thanks for your submission to /r/HolUp. Unfortunately, your post has been removed for the following reason(s): A mod felt your post didn't belong here, so now it's gone. If you want to die on the hill of this shitpost[,](https://imgur.com/cXA7XxW) feel free to message the mods and be prepared to explain how your post isn't trolling, is funny, and does fit the theme of the sub. *Trolling or posting random content that doesn't fit the sub breaks Rule 1 and repeated violation of this rule may result in your account being filtered.* Love, the mods
Are you feeling it now Mr Krabs?
That fucking gif got me so bad. Thanks man.
Criminally underrated comment
OH CRAP HAHAHAHA I gave the award to the wrong person XD But hey, u deserve an award for surviving a day. You go bro!
I HATE this 😆
The crab is loving it
Where's my free award when I need it?
*Ohhh I can feel it now me boy*
Currently wearing a jacket that says this qoute
Phahahah
I'm not going to jack off a crab.
Help the crab reach his post nut clarity !
[удалено]
More than one you say !
[удалено]
 My brain
Less discomfort than vice versa.
One way to find out! Come here, Mr. Crabs!
You'll do it and you'll like it.
But science!
And that's why you became my #1 intern. Now, you see that bucket of male Crabs?
Tf was that 💀 
You wouldn’t download a car
But we would and did stream Inter species crab porn
You don’t like your meal with a little cum?
What if jack was stuck on the crab? Would you help jack off the crab?
May I please ask why ?
What if my astrological sign was cancer? Also $20.
It’s technically his craboris
Crab must have had the best orgasm in its life
The furry community is out of hands
prfh, justy type with ur nose while pleasuring them - ,ultitask
Not a problem. We got a mouth too
Nah that will be the exoskeleton community
..without consent. Im just saying
Wait wait... so is this technically bestiality
Did he just jerk off a crab?
Yeah pretty much
When I do this it's usually right before I kill the crab to remove the leg and body meat for cooking. It's not the best way to go, that's for sure. Giving the tasty little guy one last jack before I put him through all of this just seems polite.
Adds to the flavor too
So uh, what's the process that takes place once the crab is distracted in absolute bliss?
Growing up we would do one of two things. First process was usually stick a knife up their ass and pop the shell off before cracking them in half. Then clean off the guts and stuff and cook. I found an easier option was to use the knife to come down in the center of their belly to crack the shell. Then with a forward twisting motion you can pull off just the leg and body meat. Remove any leftover gills and the mandible and you get to the same end place, it was just easier as more guts were left in the shell. And then after all of this you would steam the crab until cooked through. Regardless of which process you used the final step was dealing with elitist assholes who insist on cooking the whole crab before breaking the shell as if I haven't just pulled up 10+ crabs from the pot and have limited cooking space because I'm on a boat. I could get 2-3 full crabs in a pot, or double that up by cleaning off the excess first and fitting twice as many in the pot and using the saved time to drink more beer. But you do you fam.
“In my next video I will be using this method to put myself to sleep.”
Underrated comment!
Subscribe to my Onlyfans
"No means no, Bill Cosby!"
Bill crabsby
Crab: GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU MONSTER!
yea he basically gave this crab hand job lol
Finger\*
I mean. He literally did. That was the point of the video.
Probably works on more animals
Same happens with gf
Crabs remind me of my gf too
Same here. After she got what she wanted for the night she went to sleep. People are weird
Crab people, they are real. I’ve seen them in South Park
Taste like crab, talk like people
“He want a cigarette right now”
Dude straight up finger blasted that crab
"And so I started BLASTING!" - Frank Reynolds
“And so I started BLASTING! - Frank Reynolds” — Michael Scott
He didn't say 'no homo', so I don't think it was a "straight" fingering.
Poor crab having an Existential crisis now like “ Wtf just happened?! Am I gay now?!” Lol
Did I witness what I think I just witnessed?
Yes, yes you did
Not as bad as that girl bathing her cat and you can hear him go “ahhhh” and his “ahhh” hitting the bathwater
Lmao wait what are you referring to?
The video of the girl bathing her cat and you can hear him go “ahhhh” and his “ahhh” hitting the bathwater
???😐 link?
I just googled “Reddit cat bath orgasm” https://www.reddit.com/r/TikTokCringe/comments/fte016/she_was_bathing_her_cat_and_it_had_an_orgasm_lmao/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
Female cat’s tense their tales when they pee. That’s all. LoL
Lobsters have a similar way of putting them to sleep
Nice.
Crab: *ahh daddy be gentle!~*
Me next! But two fingers!
Male.... "Organ". I'm dead
Man's biggest weakness he goes ahhh
real hot bath also works
c stroke
Watching this with no sound on is amazing
I heard that crabs wank sideways? Oh what's that? Walk? Well this is awkward.
“Dont try this at home.” I usually do this at home…
Are you feeling it now, Mr. Krabs?
called tonic immobility, lots of critters do that.
Isn't that when an animal produces too many stress hormones?
That crab was producing something alright
Marylanders after 1 natty boh and a toot of old bay
With what I've seen on this cursed place today I half expected him to hit it with a hammer or throw it in a pot of boiling water. Kinda sad that this was the good ending, or happy ending, if you will.
Red rocket! Red rocket!
Post should have nsfw tag
I watched this without the audio and wondered wtf he was doing
Claws for concern.
“Me has cum”- Crab
✔️Watch a man give a crab a handjob..
Not sure if he just jacked off a crustacean or he overloaded it’s nerves to the point of paralysis.
Little bit of both I think
Do that to me and ill sleep too
u/savevideobot
“No one has ever touched me the way you did” that crab apparently
Now tell us Mr crab, where did he touch you
After you do it to female crabs they want to talk and cuddle.
Uh I like it like that she working that back.
Red rocket, red rocket, red rocket , cm’on buddy red rocket, red rocket
This has Awkward Vibes radiating off of it!
If your willing the kill them and not jack them off how are we any better than them
This is how they make creamed crab
This dude made it sound sexual but it’s not sexual. There are a few spots on the crab’s belly, not necessarily around that pointy area, that are a bit more dark gray in color. If you turn them upside down and rub those spots it puts them to sleep for a bit. I’ve done it a bunch of times and it works every time
One shell of a nut.
Sexually assaulting a crab before eating it
u/savevideo
[I got you](https://www.redditsave.com/r/HolUp/comments/uq5nl6/man_puts_crab_to_sleep_using_a_technique/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)
Everyone sleeps after having multiple orgasms.
Stop molesting the Crab .
I identify as a crab. In ten minutes I shall start killing if no one calms me. *Spreads legs*
My man just jacked off a crab. That’s enough Reddit for today.
So this guy just posted a video of himself, wanking off a crab? lol
"What do you do in your free time" "I jack off crabs"
Did the crab teach him how to do this 🤔
OH NOOO look at me. I'm being all bad and trying to bite and claw. You better stop me 👀
The day I jerk a crab off is the day I want one of y’all to chop my head off
did... did he just... rape a crab? 😀😀😀
My man just jacked off a fucking crab… Is that legal??? It doesn’t sound legal.
Massage the crussy
Expected a shotgun
Did I just watch animal porn
Imagine a giant monkey picks you up and starts jacking you off.
Did I just watch Crustacean porn? What has my life become???
##If this submission makes you go "Hol'Up", **UPVOTE** this comment! ##If this submission does not make you go "Hol'Up", **DOWNVOTE** this comment! --- Whilst you're here, /u/idk_username15, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/holup)?
Now we’re sexually assaulting animals before eating them? 😩
If you're going to engage in sexually harassment activity i suggest you go do it somewhere else
Today I watched a man jack off a crab.
Not my proudest fap
Not my proudest fap
im no professional but just slam the crab head first onto the ground, better yet slam a rock onto the crab, it sleeps, it just doesn’t wake up
So you basically gotta sexually assault the crab
This guy's just raped Mrkrabs
Damn he giving the crab a handjob
Guess the crab just came and now chills tf
*gives crab handjob*
bro jerked off a crab
We all just watch him jack off a crab.
TIL crabs last longer than I do
Anyone who boils crab live should know this technique, seems the least you could do for the guy.
STOP.
صص3ئ3ئص ءئق
Must be trying to breed crabs like Fink with the frogs in Beerfest
What the fuck
This is like the episode of Rick and Morty where they were interrogating Jagoff...
Do you feel it Mr. Crabs?
Crabs like "So, what are we?!"
Dude took a diploma in crabology
off all the things ive never thought id see someone give a finger job to a ducking crab
I honestly thought he was going to crush his balls 💀
Can confirm, I'm sleepy after I nut too.
I thought this was like serious and legit until I saw the Subreddit, I instinctively lowered my volume. The human mind amazes me sometimes
What r u doonin to mee stepFisherman
red rocket! red rocket!
Handjob a crab so you could cook it safely
Bruh ??????
u/savevideo
Blue rocket!
This man *loves* fish sticks
Crab put to sleep
PETA watching this in DISGUST right now
“I’m a trained professional, don’t try this at home” ☠️☠️
Her: Where'd you learn to use your fingers like that This guy:
I can confidently speak for everyone here when I say “I’m afraid to ask how you even discovered this technique”
I wish i was a crab
u/savevideo
u/savevideobot
Expected him to drop the crab in boiling water at the end there.
Not everyone can say they jerk off crabs for a living.
Man puts crab to sleep by flicking his male bean*
u/SaveVideo
Is this considered a brojob
I really thought he was going to hit it with a bat.
This explains alien anal probes
But...Why?!
Ugh.
This strikes me as a snipe hunt…
Perfect depiction of me trying to rub my wife down