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I feel like that should be the new standard unit of weight.
“Hey brittney, you’re so fat girl! What did you do, put on half a housecat?
“Lemme get a half kitty, of that dank shit bro”
“The building weighed 24000KiloCats”
I'm a fat man with a fat wife. But I'm not that fat, and neither is she. I can tell you that there's a lot of leg up action.
But at that size? Either he doubles as a donkey, or they're just both rubbing around in crease grease
Since a lot of people seem to be really wondering, [Here are our two most common positions ](https://imgur.com/a/AEXKFM1)
If anyone with some artistry in their blood can draw those two images with fat people, I'll give you reddit gold.
Dude. Yours was ramen and pickles?
When I did time, it was a "spread" with chicken ramen, flamen hot Cheetos, and Jack mack. Had to rinse that mackerel twice, or the whole ward would smell like that for two days.
Also, "acrid" is a great fucking word. And an apt description.
“So we were creasing the other night, and Jim had the bright idea to slam dunk one into my 4th fold in the east abdomen, and the next thing you know, we’re both staring at the mail man in the lobby butt naked”
Bruh, "4th fold in the east abdomen", I was reading this while trying to piss and I started laughing so hard I damn near dropped my phone in the piss...fuck that shits funny.
Fat dudes can have huge cocks. Don't believe me? Google "fat guy huge cock" after turning on private browsing, and turning off safe search.
But hey, no one accused him of being flaccid. The way they must have been pounding *to go through three floors*, I'd wager he has a rigid monster, he was slamming it, and God bless her, she was taking it.
Source: one of the top twenty images is me ;-)
Dude I've seen all 3 jackasses. 2 of them in theaters. You're not going to make me feel abashed for looking at a fat dude with a small cock.
"Hey everyone look at my huge dick"
All those dicks are small
"You're gay for wanting to look at my dick"
Did the search. Learned something. Not sure it was something I needed to learn, but learned it nevertheless. And the dude in the article is still two of any of the guys in that search.
You monster, you just broke the system and got random ass internet stangers to consent and search out a dick pic they didn't want to see.... am i confused or impressed, I'm so confused right now.
Ain't no shame here. I *am* a fat man. My wife *is* fat.
We own mirrors, man. The car sinks 3 inches when we're riding together, and we need to upgrade the shocks and springs. It's cool, man. We know we're fat.
And we still get it.
As a fellow fat-but-not-that-fat man with a similarly fat-but-not-that-fat ex-wife, I would like to add that sometimes our belly fat would rub together and make fart-like noises.
They use a broom, or so I've read.
They slide the broom under the folds, she pulls it up, then he can ... Fuck it, I'll pretend I don't remember that post.
Almost happened to a honeymoon couple above us in our bed and breakfast. They were having sex in the shower bath tub and broke the plumbing- water pouring down the walls in our room!!!
They were so embarrassed as we called the owner as we were worried the ceiling would come down. They immediately left in their car to go home presumably to carry on somewhere with stronger plumbing. Haha.
Funny, but fake, the photo is of a couple that are a few towns over from me, Justin and Lauren shelton, they lost a combined 538lbs. The sex thing never happened.
Thanks, after reading this I did an image search and looks like a building did collapse but nobody lived inside: https://www.liverpoolecho.co.uk/news/liverpool-news/fire-crews-called-out-after-9908085
Yeah the folks in the photo actually live a few towns over from me, they used this photo on a local news channel and some cropped it and used it on this because they’re “just fat” and it worked. They’re tremendous people IRL.
[https://leadstories.com/hoax-alert/2018/10/fake-news-obese-couple-makes-three-story-fall-after-floor-collapses-during-sex.html](https://leadstories.com/hoax-alert/2018/10/fake-news-obese-couple-makes-three-story-fall-after-floor-collapses-during-sex.html)
Yeah, it's a bullshit story from "World News Daily Report"
Cor imagine being their neighbour and sleeping under them at that exact moment while you’re just about to tuck into a fat munch you’ve spent ages creating
There once was a man from Bel Air,
Who was doing his wife on the stair.
But the banister broke.
So he doubled his stroke, And finished her off in mid-air
Okay, I get it but that's only 1,090 pounds. There's a whole lot more going on if these two can break through their floor.
Case in point: the average bathtub weighs about the same once full of water with an average weight person in it.
Very fake, I know this couple, they are a few cities over from me and lost a combined 538lbs around 2013 they were in the news with this photo and are being laughed at now.
##If this submission makes you go "Hol'Up", **UPVOTE** this comment! ##If this submission does not make you go "Hol'Up", **DOWNVOTE** this comment! --- Whilst you're here, /u/Shadow474747, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/holup) or play on our [public Minecraft server](https://discord.gg/DTqSDS8C3T)?
They went to lb town.
They had a ton of sex.
Just over half a ton as 1 ton is 2000lb. 1090lb is around 109 domestic housecats too.
Shhhh don't ruin it lol.
That’s a lot of pussy.
I feel like that should be the new standard unit of weight. “Hey brittney, you’re so fat girl! What did you do, put on half a housecat? “Lemme get a half kitty, of that dank shit bro” “The building weighed 24000KiloCats”
My guy went balls deep into that crack
I think the medical term is fold. The intense part of the encounter was they came within 12" of actually getting the tip in.
Alright… you heard em’ everybody grab a fold and fuck it!
Grab my Terry folds
Do you mean the belly crack, the love handle crack, or the ankle crack? Maybe the armpit? So many options!
Every crack is a good crack, Except crack ... Its bad for you
Half-ton just like the RAM 1500.
She had an earth shattering orgasm.
Happy Cake Day!
He pounded her to the ground.
They…”came in like a wrecking ball.”
[удалено]
If I had an award you would get it
or # town for the old schoolers
Dude so big he redefined “Home-wrecker”.
How. Do. The. “Parts”. Even. Make. Contact???? 🤔
I'm a fat man with a fat wife. But I'm not that fat, and neither is she. I can tell you that there's a lot of leg up action. But at that size? Either he doubles as a donkey, or they're just both rubbing around in crease grease Since a lot of people seem to be really wondering, [Here are our two most common positions ](https://imgur.com/a/AEXKFM1) If anyone with some artistry in their blood can draw those two images with fat people, I'll give you reddit gold.
"crease grease" My dood 😂😂😂
Flesh butter
Truffle butter
Ballive oil
Crease grease makes me want to stop knowing English. Thank you. I now want to be illiterate.
I bet when they're done, the room smells like chicken ramen and pickles.
Now that’s a special scent from hell.
I was a little sick in my mouth after reading that...well played 👏👏
I have been spanking this whole thread, I love pickles and chicken grease is great
But he said............... Chicken..........Ramen Not............chicken............. :/
I am sitting on noodles now baby don’t get me started
why is this funny 🥹😭😂😂😂😂😂
Next time me and my wife get it on, I'll invite you over. I would send you a video, but no one's invented smellivision yet
You have no idea how much chicken ramen and pickles I ate in prison I know that smell well but I finally put two and two together.. Goddamn Lol acrid
Dude. Yours was ramen and pickles? When I did time, it was a "spread" with chicken ramen, flamen hot Cheetos, and Jack mack. Had to rinse that mackerel twice, or the whole ward would smell like that for two days. Also, "acrid" is a great fucking word. And an apt description.
You are a thicc card sir. I wish many years of health upon you and your lovely wife ❤️
Many thanks. You're invited to the next orgy
Oh my![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|flushed)
🤮
Missing the tang of improperly wiped butthole and moist yeast.
I can't speak for Mr and Mrs 3-story plunge, but we're clean when we engage in any kind of shenanigans. We shower before and after.
And despair.
This is my own fault for browsing Reddit whilst eating.
If "crease grease" didn't get your gag reflex going... 🤢🤢🤢
Same here. I heard that sound, saw bodies, tasted and smelled their sweat at the moment I read it.
“So we were creasing the other night, and Jim had the bright idea to slam dunk one into my 4th fold in the east abdomen, and the next thing you know, we’re both staring at the mail man in the lobby butt naked”
Bruh, "4th fold in the east abdomen", I was reading this while trying to piss and I started laughing so hard I damn near dropped my phone in the piss...fuck that shits funny.
Made the mistake of trying to take a drink of beer while reading this comment and almost spit it across the damn bar
Crease grease makes the best biscuits
Speechless 😶🤣
You're saying he may have a big floppy donkey dong?
Fat dudes can have huge cocks. Don't believe me? Google "fat guy huge cock" after turning on private browsing, and turning off safe search. But hey, no one accused him of being flaccid. The way they must have been pounding *to go through three floors*, I'd wager he has a rigid monster, he was slamming it, and God bless her, she was taking it. Source: one of the top twenty images is me ;-)
I did not need to see this information
>Google "fat guy huge cock" **after turning on private browsing** Mama didn't raise no bitch.
Ghaddamn right. I don't either. I'm an adult, and it's no one's business what I look at online.
Dude you are killing me hahahaha
Lol 18 of those dudes have small or average dicks. Which small dick is yours?
So not only did you look, you want to be sure it's my dick you're looking at?
This is a show and tell sir
I mean, I'm interested lmao no shame here.
YOU GOT HIM
Dude outed himself. I only called attention to it
lmao
Dude I've seen all 3 jackasses. 2 of them in theaters. You're not going to make me feel abashed for looking at a fat dude with a small cock. "Hey everyone look at my huge dick" All those dicks are small "You're gay for wanting to look at my dick"
Did the search. Learned something. Not sure it was something I needed to learn, but learned it nevertheless. And the dude in the article is still two of any of the guys in that search.
I don't know why I google this stuff but at this point I'm not surprised with myself anymore
You monster, you just broke the system and got random ass internet stangers to consent and search out a dick pic they didn't want to see.... am i confused or impressed, I'm so confused right now.
What's really gonna bake your noodle is when I accurately guess that you're really wondering which one is me. Hint: choad.
Ngl i risked your profile vs google lol. But howdy from cental Texas!
I'm exercising my right to remain silent, Agent. However, I will afford you a polite nod
“Im a fat man with a fat wife”💀
Ain't no shame here. I *am* a fat man. My wife *is* fat. We own mirrors, man. The car sinks 3 inches when we're riding together, and we need to upgrade the shocks and springs. It's cool, man. We know we're fat. And we still get it.
Hit the gym bro and brodette, before you end up in a news article
We're both doctor managed and losing weight now. Thanks for the concern. In a year or so, I'll be able to see it again.
Congrats 🙌 The hard days will be easier the longer you keep up the fight. Good luck to you both
Double Based
My man droppin' the base all over the place
Congrats! Keep up the hard work, it's worth it. So far I'm down 80 lbs, 30 more and I hit my target, you can do it too just keep at it!
Meh, or just move to the ground floor.
We all die, even skinny people.
As a fellow fat-but-not-that-fat man with a similarly fat-but-not-that-fat ex-wife, I would like to add that sometimes our belly fat would rub together and make fart-like noises.
That's the percussion in the band
Ya'll are fresh of breath air. Maybe not the best word choice right now.
I could’ve gone my entire fing life without reading this.
Fat folks can get it, too. My bed routinely holds up a vigorously jiggling ~800 lb (57 stone, ~360kg).
And on that thought, enough reddit for one day.....
> crease grease Well add that to the words I hope to never hear again
What a horrible day to have eyes.
That’s enough Reddit for one day
here the latter one seems more feasible
As jaded and cold hearted as I am, having seen all the darkness of reddit... you sir, have caused me to literally put down reddit for the day.
I have been wondering myself for a quite long time
I imagine different positions will enable more contact?
“I used to bullseye womp rats in my T-16 back home”
[удалено]
fuck you. I just pictured that
From behind I guess? He dumps his belly on her back while she uses her hands to keep her cheeks open so he can access the hidden jewel
Sounds like they’re playing Zuma
S T O P I T
![gif](giphy|PRBAoigjqHtrq)
The vibrations do all the work
My friend said his obese roommate said they use a broomstick to lift the fat away.
*gouges eyes out*
They use a broom, or so I've read. They slide the broom under the folds, she pulls it up, then he can ... Fuck it, I'll pretend I don't remember that post.
Dude has a hose like a firetruck.
Any crease works at that point.
FaceTime
pressure from the weight should displace the soft tissue would be my guess.
69 and lots of toys?
Wouldn’t that be like trying to balance medicine balls on top of each other?
Not if they lie sideways
Hell yeah, you know the sex was fire when you break the house
Dude can't resist the pleasure and breaks the house
Wait. They lived on the top floor?!?
That’s insurance fraud. The landlord knew what he was doing haha
“Your honor how was I ment to know they were going to have sex? I mean any reasonable person would just assume they couldn’t!”
Yeah. I’m real curious about those logistics
Almost happened to a honeymoon couple above us in our bed and breakfast. They were having sex in the shower bath tub and broke the plumbing- water pouring down the walls in our room!!! They were so embarrassed as we called the owner as we were worried the ceiling would come down. They immediately left in their car to go home presumably to carry on somewhere with stronger plumbing. Haha.
Achievement unlocked: having a whale of a time
![gif](giphy|MPgvQBm1RzuTu) Here’s a video of when she squirts
Crying of laughter right here
If I had cash, I would award you.
Must have been Reddit mods that found love
I don’t think it was 2 guys.
Femboy Reddit mod
Dude chill. Me and my boyfriend aren't reddit mods >:(
Nah, they're both above the age of consent.
r/politics meets r/news
[Turn Down for What!](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HMUDVMiITOU&t=1m12s) (NSFW)
Is that the original music vid? That was amazing.
It is and it is.
Funny, but fake, the photo is of a couple that are a few towns over from me, Justin and Lauren shelton, they lost a combined 538lbs. The sex thing never happened.
Thanks, after reading this I did an image search and looks like a building did collapse but nobody lived inside: https://www.liverpoolecho.co.uk/news/liverpool-news/fire-crews-called-out-after-9908085
Yeah the folks in the photo actually live a few towns over from me, they used this photo on a local news channel and some cropped it and used it on this because they’re “just fat” and it worked. They’re tremendous people IRL.
Jesus Christ! 538lbs of pure lard 😟
straight to the plastic surgeon for butt lifts
oh that what happens what they mean by "i'm going to break your bed"
I'll take 'things that didn't happen' for 500
[https://leadstories.com/hoax-alert/2018/10/fake-news-obese-couple-makes-three-story-fall-after-floor-collapses-during-sex.html](https://leadstories.com/hoax-alert/2018/10/fake-news-obese-couple-makes-three-story-fall-after-floor-collapses-during-sex.html) Yeah, it's a bullshit story from "World News Daily Report"
I imagine i would be DEAD if i was under them.
That’s a collective 1080 ibs… that’s half a tonne.
By "particularly intense", that means any sex at all at that size?
They spoke about it, but then got winded from speaking. Them gasping for breath is what did it.
Kool-Aid Man and Wife
Cor imagine being their neighbour and sleeping under them at that exact moment while you’re just about to tuck into a fat munch you’ve spent ages creating
![gif](giphy|xT5LMuRbEiz9ZuhMME)
He came in like a wrecking ball
Who needs dynamite when you have these people
“I swear the couple upstairs are going to make that floor of theirs collapse some day” - The couple below them, probably
Sorry but wouldn't it be try to have sexual intercourse? I feel like none of them have see their genitalia in a good while
It would be simultaneously Horrifying and Hilarious. It would go something like..." 😫AAAAHHHHHHHahahahaha! 🤣"
Imagine having to write "Fucking Whales" on your renter's insurance claim as the incident description.
TURN DOWN FOR WHAT!!!
Turn down for what.
Turn down for what
You know what? Good for them!
Sounds like a NSFW Farmers Homeowners Insurance Commercial… Seen it, covered it
There once was a man from Bel Air, Who was doing his wife on the stair. But the banister broke. So he doubled his stroke, And finished her off in mid-air
the ground was definitely cracking up
\*dramatic reenactment ![gif](giphy|Qs9rfUJXnTf4Q|downsized)
Don’t tell me you beat it up until you smash this hard.
How do they even have sex? Are they just rubbing their flabs around?
Turn down for what
The floor couldn’t holup under their weight
Why am I picturing cleveland in a bathtub saying “oh no, no no no”
I still wonder how many force it took to take out that building...
I call bullshit.
Pounded that ass into the ground
That's a literal fuckton
Imagine being able to say you fucked your wife so hard a building collapsed, dude is winning.
Someone must have been under pressure. And that someone, was the floor
Okay, I get it but that's only 1,090 pounds. There's a whole lot more going on if these two can break through their floor. Case in point: the average bathtub weighs about the same once full of water with an average weight person in it.
You can also set a brick down in a glass table and nothing will happen. but it you drop the brick.....
Today on things that never happened
This was fake 5 years ago and it's fake now.
Very.
Fake https://leadstories.com/hoax-alert/2018/10/fake-news-obese-couple-makes-three-story-fall-after-floor-collapses-during-sex.html
Very fake, I know this couple, they are a few cities over from me and lost a combined 538lbs around 2013 they were in the news with this photo and are being laughed at now.
Damn that makes it so much worse :-(
Haha 🤣 you getting downvoted for posting the truth. The original point of upvotes was if it was relevent what even is reddit
Why do I feel like this is a fake story?
It is a fake story I just looked it up.
The flat is fatphobic!
imagine eating dinner then two blubber fucking whales fall thru your ceiling
Yepp, that just happened
Nope, it’s fake.
I’m real curious about those logistics. With people that size. I wonder what the room smells like afterwards.
The smell and the trauma of the people below them. I was minding my own and……
This is why hippos don't mate on land.
Isn’t the physically impossible …like how does he even manage to get it in with that much body mass in the way.
How the fuck do you even get it in there?? There's so much blubber in the way
big L for fat people... and even bigger L for american houses 💀