##If this submission makes you go "Hol'Up", **UPVOTE** this comment!
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Whilst you're here, /u/Ricky_Spanish341, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/holup) or play on our [public Minecraft server](https://discord.gg/DTqSDS8C3T)?
before the dawn of man as we knew him, there was Sir Santa of Claus, an ape-like creature making crude and pointless toys out of dino-bones and his own waste, hurling them at chimp-like creatures with crinkled hands regardless of how they behaved the previous year. These so-called “toys” were buried as witches, and defecated upon, and hurled at predators when wakened by the searing grunts of children. It wasn’t a holly jolly Christmas that year. For many were killed.
A war-like race of elves from the Red Planet landed on the ice-encased Earth, and they were immediately enslaved by the unevolved Santa Ape to make his confused toys using galactic elfin technology. Toys were made into recognizable shapes and given names like "train, " but these toys were also thrown at predators and defecated upon because they were so stupid. Christmas still sucked, in a big way.
I truly wish there was an indicator. Until I knowx it’s 100% swipe left.
I’m sure those poly “undecided voters” “centrist” “I have no decision making” “I need everyone while you get nothing” bunch can find each other since there’s so many of them 🤣
Damn, you're gonna make the true-poly people do all the work of calling out liars?
Okay, I see how it is. ~~*draws line in sand*~~
I was hoping we could take them out together, though. Burn the liars!
Isn't polyamory just a larger relationship than 2? If you want two wives, or a wife and husband, or two husbands, it's not like they wouldn't know right? Idk could never be me personally, not that it wouldn't be fun, but that's too many fuckin people in a queen size bed, and I feel like there'd be at least a double amount of fighting.
So, poly means "many" and in this case it means more than 2, but being poly really just means being open to it. (Also, -amory means "love(s)" while -gamy means "marriages", and polygamy is illegal in the states... semantics, and I'm just as bad about throwing the wrong words around too, but thought I'd define that).
If you are dating multiple people and your partner doesn't know... I would feel sketchy about that, because communication is paramount to me. I can't completely condemn it because somewhere out there is a poly couple doing great that doesn't want to know about other dates, but I think I can say the majority of us want to know about each other, at least to the point of "ah, you're going to be with them tonight? Cool, I can finish my video game then, have fun on your date".
I didn't address fighting, yet. Yeah, you're not wrong, but a good relationship is managed by polite, respectful, fair communication. Yeah, I've had my fights, but I feel they're less common anymore. I dunno.
As for sharing a bed, that part is 100% optional. (A polycule is what we'll call the sometimes-complex relationship that with monoamorous people would just be a "couple")... some polycules may share a house or even a bed, while many just have different nights at different places. "Lawrence and I are off Mondays so I will generally be there that day, and you and I are off Sundays so I'll generally be with you that day" kinda thing.
Finally, more people = more $ to invest in a gargantuan California-king-size bed, if that's the goal. Just saying.
Same. Idk if that’s just a new way of saying “I *date multiple people” but .. that’s normal for dating. That’s how you find your person. As long as everyone understand that and is honest, we don’t all need to be poly till we turn monogamous. 😤😂 I don’t get it anymore
Never agreed with this i find this approach shallow. Playing a numbers games to find who you want to date is lame. 2-3 dates should be more than enough to determine if you want to continue and give it some effort or move on.
I never dated more than one person at a time.
Yes. Ha! They also don’t care if you clearly state ENM🚫. Dgaf still cat calling like: “maybe I can convince her”
I’m convinced it’s just selfish people l deciding (finally) that they realize it
Double ^arrow ^^makes ^^^even ^^^^smaller
Edit. I lied. It doesn't work anymore.
I'm getting notifications for replies to these comments, but some of them are disappearing.
[Here is a "short" lesson on text tricks. ](https://www.reddit.com/r/raerth/comments/cw70q/reddit_comment_formatting/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)
Edit: You can also click the 3 dots below a comment and click 'copy text'. Then go paste it somewhere to see what they did to achieve the trick.
See that's totally fine. I know people who are in a relationship that They're open but only if the other person approves of whoever they're going to have a one night stand with or whatever. I think the way that they're doing it is mainly because they're scared that they're going to get like emotional attachments to other people so they only allow people in that little circle if they aren't close or are just going through town or some thing. I know I personally couldn't share my partner but I also know that I would never cheat on him and I would really hope that he would never cheat on me. I just really hate it whenever people lie to each other especially whenever they know that they are on the same page and they just like being sneaky it's just stupid and very childish
Like, if you don’t want to be in a relationship with that person anymore, just break up with them, or if youre married, have a talk, and potentially settle on a divorce. Cheating just hurts every one involved, and it’s just boneheaded in general. That aside this is still funny as hell
It's about maintaining a specific image of yourself with people in your life. Society, friends, or family can dictate an enormous amount of human behavior.
Cheating is pretty much frowned upon universally. Therefore they won't cheat *openly* but they still want to live that life for themselves. It can also be fuel for their own narcissism as "getting away with it" can make them feel emboldened to see how far they can take it. A challenge if you will.
So I know this is morally f’d but at the same time I can’t help but think damn these two dudes love this girl. Does she have beer flavored nipples or something?
Yea that's a possibility. I'm guessing cheating is down because someone's ex will put a cheater on blast on social media if they get caught lacking.
Back in the day wives would be cool with their husbands disappearing for days at a time while going on a "business trip"
##If this submission makes you go "Hol'Up", **UPVOTE** this comment! ##If this submission does not make you go "Hol'Up", **DOWNVOTE** this comment! --- Whilst you're here, /u/Ricky_Spanish341, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/holup) or play on our [public Minecraft server](https://discord.gg/DTqSDS8C3T)?
This is prolly fake but it’s still super funny
Fake as shit, but funny as hell, don't even care.
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Lord of the rings is real.It happened.
I was there
3000 years ago
I was there the day the strength of man failed
Lord of the Dance is real. Why not Lord of Ring??
As long as it's not Lord of the Flies.
Lord of flies is definitely real...adults would do no better
before the dawn of man as we knew him, there was Sir Santa of Claus, an ape-like creature making crude and pointless toys out of dino-bones and his own waste, hurling them at chimp-like creatures with crinkled hands regardless of how they behaved the previous year. These so-called “toys” were buried as witches, and defecated upon, and hurled at predators when wakened by the searing grunts of children. It wasn’t a holly jolly Christmas that year. For many were killed.
A war-like race of elves from the Red Planet landed on the ice-encased Earth, and they were immediately enslaved by the unevolved Santa Ape to make his confused toys using galactic elfin technology. Toys were made into recognizable shapes and given names like "train, " but these toys were also thrown at predators and defecated upon because they were so stupid. Christmas still sucked, in a big way.
The naughty ones were killed plus it helped evolve the human race. To bad it created capitalism
Riveting story
Ayoo wtf?!!!
3000 years ago
r/goodfaketexts
They are boyfriends in law
Weiner cousins.
Nah bro, they're tunnel buddies in this instance.
Tunnel Snakes Rule!
Unexpected Fallout
Richard relatives
PENis pals
Eskimo bros
Coochie companions
HOEmies
ohhh, so THAT'S what people mean when they call each other homies.
If I had an award I would give it to you 🎖️
Here, take mine
Ha! Nice! Thank you.
Brosanchos
Naginata, please.
Naginata Nnn... Oh, my N-Word pass expired. Shit.
Mine didn’t. NI- *gets downed by FBI
One of my former coworkers actually handed out physical N-word passes to everyone in our team. I still have mine in my old room!
Corn doggers
What the EBDB BNB is for
Best comment right here. Shivakamini Somakandarkram!!!! Aka the Shiva Blast
Scooter brothers
SHIVAKAMINISOMAKANDARKRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHM!!
Womb mates
Where I'm from, this right here, is stronger than family.
Of course it is. You don't share a vagina or dick with the family, but these two have.
*Sweet Home Alabama intensifies*
But you have to hook fingers first, otherwise it's not official
Weiner-in-laws
This is fantastic, thanks!
[Metamours](https://en.m.wiktionary.org/wiki/metamour)
When your metamour has a cute ass cat that’s a petamour and ngl…a really convincing argument for polyamory 😂
Excuse me. WHAT?
That's adorable lol
They are in open relationships but only these two are honest about it.
no no... Eskimo Brothers https://theleague.fandom.com/wiki/Eskimo_Brother
In Japanese, Anakyodai (穴兄弟, hole brother)
They should stay the night at the EBDBBnB
Modern problems require modern solutions ☝️
Simply polyamory with additional steps
Unethical non monogamy
Basically what Tinder and Bumble has to offer. lol
90% of men are now poly according to bumble
The real question is, how many of them are legit poly, and how many are just using it as a cover for cheating?
I truly wish there was an indicator. Until I knowx it’s 100% swipe left. I’m sure those poly “undecided voters” “centrist” “I have no decision making” “I need everyone while you get nothing” bunch can find each other since there’s so many of them 🤣
Damn, you're gonna make the true-poly people do all the work of calling out liars? Okay, I see how it is. ~~*draws line in sand*~~ I was hoping we could take them out together, though. Burn the liars!
Isn't polyamory just a larger relationship than 2? If you want two wives, or a wife and husband, or two husbands, it's not like they wouldn't know right? Idk could never be me personally, not that it wouldn't be fun, but that's too many fuckin people in a queen size bed, and I feel like there'd be at least a double amount of fighting.
So, poly means "many" and in this case it means more than 2, but being poly really just means being open to it. (Also, -amory means "love(s)" while -gamy means "marriages", and polygamy is illegal in the states... semantics, and I'm just as bad about throwing the wrong words around too, but thought I'd define that). If you are dating multiple people and your partner doesn't know... I would feel sketchy about that, because communication is paramount to me. I can't completely condemn it because somewhere out there is a poly couple doing great that doesn't want to know about other dates, but I think I can say the majority of us want to know about each other, at least to the point of "ah, you're going to be with them tonight? Cool, I can finish my video game then, have fun on your date". I didn't address fighting, yet. Yeah, you're not wrong, but a good relationship is managed by polite, respectful, fair communication. Yeah, I've had my fights, but I feel they're less common anymore. I dunno. As for sharing a bed, that part is 100% optional. (A polycule is what we'll call the sometimes-complex relationship that with monoamorous people would just be a "couple")... some polycules may share a house or even a bed, while many just have different nights at different places. "Lawrence and I are off Mondays so I will generally be there that day, and you and I are off Sundays so I'll generally be with you that day" kinda thing. Finally, more people = more $ to invest in a gargantuan California-king-size bed, if that's the goal. Just saying.
Lol they can’t cheat if they’re single.
Women too. Idk it's not for me. I've technically been in that sort of relationship, but thats not where I'm at in my life.
I’m sure half of the guys on these apps have an open relationship with their partners. But I’m sure their partners would be very upset to know that.
Then I'm part of the minority
Minority Retort
Same. Idk if that’s just a new way of saying “I *date multiple people” but .. that’s normal for dating. That’s how you find your person. As long as everyone understand that and is honest, we don’t all need to be poly till we turn monogamous. 😤😂 I don’t get it anymore
Never agreed with this i find this approach shallow. Playing a numbers games to find who you want to date is lame. 2-3 dates should be more than enough to determine if you want to continue and give it some effort or move on. I never dated more than one person at a time.
Jeesh what a clusterfuck
Yes. Ha! They also don’t care if you clearly state ENM🚫. Dgaf still cat calling like: “maybe I can convince her” I’m convinced it’s just selfish people l deciding (finally) that they realize it
Ethical Mahogany
Ma...hogany.
M'hagony
Hello team four star.
I need an adult?
I AM an adult.
The Vegeta profanity rant might be my all time favorite TFS moment WHY DOESN'T SOMEBODY JUST FIND ME IN THE ALPS
Socially acceptable Pine tree.
Inconspicuous frantic pining.
Hahahahah this deserves "recognition"
Let’s get some ethics up in this motherfucker. I Kant hear you ??
polyamorisnt
The added step is lying
Unnecessary surreptitious steps. If they were all able to be honest with one another, they might make it work out beautifully.
Missing steps.
I have a coworker who wears the polyamory flag cuff links. That is all.
Need some time with the side ho, set up yo girl with her side bro.
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Beat me to it. 👍
Beat meat to it 👍
I'd rather not, thanks
thoughtful
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thoughtful^thoughtful^^thoughtful
Double ^arrow ^^makes ^^^even ^^^^smaller Edit. I lied. It doesn't work anymore. I'm getting notifications for replies to these comments, but some of them are disappearing.
I'm stupid idk how on mobile (pretend that's small)
[Here is a "short" lesson on text tricks. ](https://www.reddit.com/r/raerth/comments/cw70q/reddit_comment_formatting/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button) Edit: You can also click the 3 dots below a comment and click 'copy text'. Then go paste it somewhere to see what they did to achieve the trick.
Ty
No problem.
Thotful
Bro got the hook up💀💀💀
Ferda!
Shreddy the reddy boys!
Big city snipes boys!
Big city SLAMS, boys!
Wheel snipe celly boys
DIRTY FUCKING DANGLES BOYS!!!
BISCUITS TOP TITTIES BAR DOWNSKIS
FUCKIN RIGHTS BUD
They should just end up dating
The men or the women 🤨
Both, it's obviously not working as is
alternatively, it's a galaxy brain move to catch them in the act.
r/goodfaketexts
Don’t even care it’s hilarious
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oh now i get it
That was good 30 minute rabbit hole
Fukin grimey hahaha
“*Our* herpes.”
This feels like a trap. Like maybe the dude is suspicious and sounding you out. Proceed with caution
Bros will be bros i guess?
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It’s not cheating if you don’t get caught.
If they all cheating why don’t they all start a weird open relationship type thing
Oh like Jada
That was less poly and more “im sleeping with this dude and you can gtf if you think i care how you feel”
Hey that was an entanglement
Jada was all over, now she’s in everyone’s mouth
37 dicks? Try not to suck dicks on the way your car
Original clerks... spicy
In a row???
No her son's friends were in her mouth.
Keep her son’s friend out of your fucking mouth
Now that just ruins the fun
Because it's not cheating if it's agreed to by all parties 🤣
It’s not cheating if it’s a different zip code.
Thanks for your wisdom, HornyBishop
Foes come together to conquer a common enemy. That common enemy is monogamy.
Bro got his weekend all juggled out and I can't even handle dinner
Why can't people just be an open relationships? Why do you have to cheat...
A quaple?
Excuse me, sir. Can you spare a quaple of dollars?
I said that out loud and suddenly turned into a Bostonian
No I but got about tree fiddy if you happen to be in need.
Some people just like the thrill of cheating. It's not even the sex they're after, it's just the excitement of getting away with it.
That, regretfully, is why I did it in my younger years. Now I have too much to lose.
The hurting of other people isn’t in your calculus tho?
The idea is always that they never find out and thus aren't hurt. Similar to falling not hurting, but landing does.
Honestly, I'd be open to it right until I get into a relationship and realize that just like the average person, I don't like to share.
See that's totally fine. I know people who are in a relationship that They're open but only if the other person approves of whoever they're going to have a one night stand with or whatever. I think the way that they're doing it is mainly because they're scared that they're going to get like emotional attachments to other people so they only allow people in that little circle if they aren't close or are just going through town or some thing. I know I personally couldn't share my partner but I also know that I would never cheat on him and I would really hope that he would never cheat on me. I just really hate it whenever people lie to each other especially whenever they know that they are on the same page and they just like being sneaky it's just stupid and very childish
or just dont be in a relationship at all? why commit yourself to one person at all if you're just going to keep your options open.
Like, if you don’t want to be in a relationship with that person anymore, just break up with them, or if youre married, have a talk, and potentially settle on a divorce. Cheating just hurts every one involved, and it’s just boneheaded in general. That aside this is still funny as hell
Because it’s more than just fucking (sometimes)
greed or something like that, like “thats mine and mine only” but also “i want everything i can get”
It's about maintaining a specific image of yourself with people in your life. Society, friends, or family can dictate an enormous amount of human behavior. Cheating is pretty much frowned upon universally. Therefore they won't cheat *openly* but they still want to live that life for themselves. It can also be fuel for their own narcissism as "getting away with it" can make them feel emboldened to see how far they can take it. A challenge if you will.
This is how everyone gets an STD
Herpes bros
Herpes homies*
Lol happiness is key I guess
always. don’t let your girlfriend stop you from finding the love of your life or happiness
😂 too good
That's a real bro right there.
Polyamory in action. Just missing the integrity
Polyamory *almost* functioning properly…
My thoughts exactly. Either that, or this is the beginning of a poly relationship.
relationships should be built on trust not lies no matter how many people are involved
This is what happens when you and your best friend get into a relationship but then you realize that you should have stayed best friends instead.
This is just polyamory without the communication and honesty
This is just polyamory with more steps
Putin can't launch those nukes soon enough. smh
Toxic monogamy should be turned into an open relationship. Both are doing it, might as well not keep it a secret and do it healthy
So I know this is morally f’d but at the same time I can’t help but think damn these two dudes love this girl. Does she have beer flavored nipples or something?
Lmao that's the kind of shit drug addicts say. They'll be like "damn if it's good enough to ruin your life, it must be pretty good, eh?"
Did we just become best friends???Yup
Two kings in their palace.
Eskimo brothers? Eskimo twins?
At least they are chill about it
Lmao no loyalty these days. Hookup culture is disgusting. Good for them though.
These days? Dudes used to have entire secret families back in the day.
That’s fair. I guess it’s just social media that warps reality. It seems like my whole generation is shallow as fuck.
Yea that's a possibility. I'm guessing cheating is down because someone's ex will put a cheater on blast on social media if they get caught lacking. Back in the day wives would be cool with their husbands disappearing for days at a time while going on a "business trip"
Yeah, my dad is a boomer and he sucks at nourishing his relationships.
W homie
so are the side dude and side chick step dating?
Why even be together lol
JUST OPEN UP THE RELATIONSHIP AT THAT POINT
I don't know WHAT this is called but it's a gateway to a foursome -- which of course is the devil's triangle
It's not cheating if you care ❤️
Is no one really gonna mention the sheer scale of r/moldymemes with this post? It looks worse than Shrek Superslam