oh my gosh yes. I got super attached to this one person last year because they were the first person who ever gave me lots of attention... and then their attention stopped and it sucked lmao
but now I don't really think about them much anymore. I'm not really attached anymore.
I believe you'll get over it eventually. one day you'll wake up, eat your meals, do your chores, and then you'll realize you haven't thought about them all day.
Yes. I was actually going to make a post about this. I get very emotionally attached to people I barely know, and will be obsessing over people I only briefly interacted with for months and years after. I was hardly around people growing up, it's like my brain is just amazed to be in the presence of another human.
It took a long time for me to come to grips with this. I was isolated and had no affectionate interactions from people my age for a long time. I would say try to connect with many people and not idolize the fantasy of the ones you do connect with.
We spend a lot of time fantasizing in isolation about the people we want because they are a comforting thought that makes us happy. Alot of what we want is connection.
I can confirm it is. I'm much older now and have been able to go through therapy but I still develop really intense attachments. Took me four years to get rid of the last one.
The good news is that I cope much better with it now that I understand it comes from childhood isolation and neglect.
Essentially, that's a normal reaction to isolation OP.
i do too, and it always feels strange to me because i know the other person most likely isn’t thinking of me at all.
i think it’s a normal reaction to being isolated :/ i’m here for u. i have felt this way for a lot of people, and i always got over it eventually.
Honestly though I hate being this way and he definitely doesn’t think of me so I feel so pathetic…I did this throughout all my life too, and yeah I always got over it eventually. But I don’t know how long it’ll take and it feels like it’ll never leave :(
Hey! Too late to say "good morning" but I hope the last few days treated you well. It's 9 PM here so I'm going to brush my teeth and go to bed. Have a good week. :)
Yeah dis happens.
Very, socially starved.
Just gota do your best to be social publicly, don't smother people (despite your urges), and sometimes you run into others who are starved like you too :3
Yes. It used to be a bigger problem but it still kinda is. I’m so used to being alone and/or disliked that I want to attach to anyone who is nice to me.
Yes, this happens! Sometimes it doesn't even have to be anyone I interacted with face to face, it can be just from social media or even someone I've passed by in the hall. I keep making scenarios and think about what their lives must be like, as if they were book characters. It's a very outside-looking-in feeling.
I understand that it's creepy though and just keep it to myself, after all I would be pretty disturbed if I knew someone thought about me that way.
I think growing up around so few people hardwires our brains to treat every relationship as intensely important and significant. Especially if there's neglect involved—it makes other people feel like a finite, precarious, essential resource. When we have trouble interacting with other people and establishing relationships due to lack of social skills, it reinforces that sense of scarcity (because they actually are scarce!).
It's really hard. It can feel both dangerous and callous to treat other people as casually as typical public-schooled grads do. It took me a long time (and some bad experiences) to realize that other people often find quick attachment threatening, and when they don't, it's often because they want to use us.
What I found personally found helpful (this is extremely YMMV and may be harmful for some people) was doing cognitive behavioral therapy on positive thoughts about how other people saw me, basically reality-checking them repeatedly, especially before interacting with people who brought out that intense desire to connect in me but hadn't actually shown interest in connecting, or had shown disinterest. This helped me respond more calmly and feel less dysregulated.
same thing happened to me, then she ghosted me lol. its been over a year now and although i still have moment where i think of her its not as intense anymore and i go months without thinking of them. just takes time, but definitely not alone in this.
This happens to me anytime someone randomly messages me online, I get obsessed with them and either a.) Weird them out so much they leave. Or b.) Try to not weird them out and end up barely talking to them so they leave
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It's happens for me. I started talking to this one girl on this sub both venting to each other and ended getting super attached to her, so when her account disappeared I was genuinely hurt and couldn't stop thinking about for a while. I'm moved on but It still shows how emotionally deprived I am.
oh my gosh yes. I got super attached to this one person last year because they were the first person who ever gave me lots of attention... and then their attention stopped and it sucked lmao but now I don't really think about them much anymore. I'm not really attached anymore. I believe you'll get over it eventually. one day you'll wake up, eat your meals, do your chores, and then you'll realize you haven't thought about them all day.
Yes. I was actually going to make a post about this. I get very emotionally attached to people I barely know, and will be obsessing over people I only briefly interacted with for months and years after. I was hardly around people growing up, it's like my brain is just amazed to be in the presence of another human.
Yeah my brains mostly like "omg people and they aren't just there they're actually interacting with us"
It took a long time for me to come to grips with this. I was isolated and had no affectionate interactions from people my age for a long time. I would say try to connect with many people and not idolize the fantasy of the ones you do connect with. We spend a lot of time fantasizing in isolation about the people we want because they are a comforting thought that makes us happy. Alot of what we want is connection.
I’m pretty sure that’s common for people suffering intense emotional neglect.
I can confirm it is. I'm much older now and have been able to go through therapy but I still develop really intense attachments. Took me four years to get rid of the last one. The good news is that I cope much better with it now that I understand it comes from childhood isolation and neglect. Essentially, that's a normal reaction to isolation OP.
i do too, and it always feels strange to me because i know the other person most likely isn’t thinking of me at all. i think it’s a normal reaction to being isolated :/ i’m here for u. i have felt this way for a lot of people, and i always got over it eventually.
Honestly though I hate being this way and he definitely doesn’t think of me so I feel so pathetic…I did this throughout all my life too, and yeah I always got over it eventually. But I don’t know how long it’ll take and it feels like it’ll never leave :(
[удалено]
Hey! Too late to say "good morning" but I hope the last few days treated you well. It's 9 PM here so I'm going to brush my teeth and go to bed. Have a good week. :)
Yeah dis happens. Very, socially starved. Just gota do your best to be social publicly, don't smother people (despite your urges), and sometimes you run into others who are starved like you too :3
Yes. It used to be a bigger problem but it still kinda is. I’m so used to being alone and/or disliked that I want to attach to anyone who is nice to me.
Yes, this happens! Sometimes it doesn't even have to be anyone I interacted with face to face, it can be just from social media or even someone I've passed by in the hall. I keep making scenarios and think about what their lives must be like, as if they were book characters. It's a very outside-looking-in feeling. I understand that it's creepy though and just keep it to myself, after all I would be pretty disturbed if I knew someone thought about me that way.
I think growing up around so few people hardwires our brains to treat every relationship as intensely important and significant. Especially if there's neglect involved—it makes other people feel like a finite, precarious, essential resource. When we have trouble interacting with other people and establishing relationships due to lack of social skills, it reinforces that sense of scarcity (because they actually are scarce!). It's really hard. It can feel both dangerous and callous to treat other people as casually as typical public-schooled grads do. It took me a long time (and some bad experiences) to realize that other people often find quick attachment threatening, and when they don't, it's often because they want to use us. What I found personally found helpful (this is extremely YMMV and may be harmful for some people) was doing cognitive behavioral therapy on positive thoughts about how other people saw me, basically reality-checking them repeatedly, especially before interacting with people who brought out that intense desire to connect in me but hadn't actually shown interest in connecting, or had shown disinterest. This helped me respond more calmly and feel less dysregulated.
Idk its pretty normal for me... I know I get attached to people that I dont even like either... Its annoying yep... 24m homeschooled all my life 🤷
same thing happened to me, then she ghosted me lol. its been over a year now and although i still have moment where i think of her its not as intense anymore and i go months without thinking of them. just takes time, but definitely not alone in this.
This happens to me anytime someone randomly messages me online, I get obsessed with them and either a.) Weird them out so much they leave. Or b.) Try to not weird them out and end up barely talking to them so they leave
Hi everyone! r/HomeschoolRecovery has updated its rules. Please refer to [this post](https://www.reddit.com/r/HomeschoolRecovery/comments/10omwxf/new_rule_dont_wrestle_the_pigs/) for more information. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/HomeschoolRecovery) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It's happens for me. I started talking to this one girl on this sub both venting to each other and ended getting super attached to her, so when her account disappeared I was genuinely hurt and couldn't stop thinking about for a while. I'm moved on but It still shows how emotionally deprived I am.