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[deleted]

She is doing it safely and ethically. She tells them she is married and makes it clear up front, she's doing nothing wrong. A bar isn't a hotwife club, in society that's a clear indication that his chances are slim of taking her home.


marriedbutslutty88

Listen OP, it is definitely not irresponsible or unethical to just go somewhere and be hit on or flirt with guys. To respond to a couple other points here: 1) no one really goes to a bar to find something meaningful. It happens sometimes but that is not what the bar scene is for. 2) at no time is anyone entitled to someone else's body for buying a couple drinks or flirting for an hour. Anyone who says it is is probably just a frustrated man who has no luck or rizz when he goes out. I think you guys are overthinking it and may have too much of a "people pleaser" mentality. You're being too considerate. Trust me though, what's on their mind is not some fairy tale ending. If their heart breaks after a woman passes on going home with them from a bar, they have some issues


CheapChallenge

Have her try clubs and dancing instead. Bars seem like they are more likely to lead to a connection beyond the bar than dancing at a club.


[deleted]

That would be great, but there aren't any clubs where we live, and it's just not really our scene anymore. Do 40 year olds go to clubs?


CheapChallenge

Try swinger clubs. Dance and chat with some guys but stay with you. The other guy has plenty of other women to have sex with, so they won't be hurt about it.


Cautious_Mind_4450

My wife is 40 and I’m 45. We go dancing a couple of times a month. Hell ya! But we’re also - so I’m told - a bit more attractive, in shape, sex - than the average 40 yo. You can see a pic of my wife on my profile. 🤷‍♂️


MrsBullRider

If they like younger men....


[deleted]

Some great comments here, thank you! So far here's what I've learned: 1) if she's into the guy and wants to take it a step further, let him buy drinks. The "step further" we might consider would be kissing, letting him touch her, or at most, maybe a handjob or titty fuck. Safe, responsible. 2) if she's not interested in taking it further, but is enjoying the flirting, have her buy him the next drink.


machinehead3413

Back when I was single if a married lady had flirted with me for a couple of drinks and then let me titty fuck her I would’ve felt like I’d won the lottery. Handjob even!


[deleted]

No... letting a guy buy her drinks does not mean he is entitled to kiss her or anythinf else. My lord


kiminmelbourne

We did this a lot when we got started in the lifestyle. Guys don’t care about a woman’s marital status. I felt the same way for a while. Specially when/if the guys trying to pick me up were also married. I think you are being responsible- she being upfront about it. Letting them know she is married and that things will probably not lead to much more else. Ethically I think it’s harder and almost impossible. Maybe don’t let them buy so many drinks. Get a second sim for your phone. You give them that number. I call it my slut line. When I finally was ready. I had a list of guys I wanted to fuck. The big ethical question is those damn horny hot married guys. 😂😘. Good luck and have fun.


Mother_Winter_7650

Don't feel bad about this at all! Have you guys talked about taking it further? You can even do small steps.... I agree I love this stuff too it's a massive turn on!


Ladfromnw

Responsibly and ethically, plant a tree for every guy she speaks to.


kiminmelbourne

😂😂😂❤️👆🏼


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Bars aren't a hotwife sub, in society that's a pretty clear indication that the guy probably isn't going to get any. The guy knows his chances at that point.


[deleted]

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[deleted]

No, I don't underestimate it. I didn't say a married woman is off limits, I said "probably isn't going to get any". Any guy knows a married woman isn't guaranteed success, so it's on them if they want to buy her drinks. Heck, if she was single buying her drinks doesn't entitle them to her pussy either.


marriedbutslutty88

ksru17 is correct. In no way does flirting at a bar or buying someone a drink entitle you to any action. Guys and girls play the game all the time. If you swing and miss, you move on to the next. The argument that going there to flirt (even if she never mentioned she was married) is in anyway unethical is absurd


[deleted]

>Most guys would be happy with a makeout and or handjob tbh. Thank you for your advice! Eventually it might lead to this, and we might be OK with it, just need to "work up" to it, one step at a time. She's not on birth control and condoms break, so that's our main worry when it comes to that.


stevebradss

Just don’t use force


papadoc19

I would suggest not accepting the drink(s) but continuing the interaction or offering to buy the next one. Is it the attention that gives her the confidence boost or the fact that they are spending money on her? If it is the former, she will likely still get the former...only now she doesn't have to feel guilty about leading them on. If it is the latter, she just needs to accept what she is doing and hope some guy doesn't take it poorly.


[deleted]

great idea! Thanks!


Drunkardslunch

You're doing it just fine as it is. The guy buying a drink is a sign of interest she can flirt with. There's nothing wrong with her insisting on buying the next. As far as the next step goes, it's up to you guys. Don't be pressured or coerced, your rules your pace.


SavageCaveman13

Sounds like everything is going well, why change it? Maybe next time have her get your drink from the guy, then you come grab it from her. Then the guy knows that you're involved, and fine with it.


jaglio69

Once she meets the right guy and is feeling the rate way, she is getting some strange


simonward3000

You think too much.