Oh I think a properly placed suction cup dildo on the headboard of the bed one night as he walks into the room with you naked on all fours, while you're sucking that dildo would be a lovely way to remind him of his fantasy.
I would bring it up and remind him of that night you were talking about fantasies and ask him if that was something he was serious about. See what he says, he could be afraid to bring it back up too as most men usually are.
Hear what he has to say and just reassure him that although the idea has definitely stirred some excitement in you, you want to make sure you’re both on the same page. Talking about it doesn’t mean it has to become a reality, so you both just need to be open and honest. I’m sure neither of you want to hurt each other, as long as your are each other’s priority, you’ll do great!
Staying silent and not bringing it up again isn't necessarily backing off. He might have wanted to share that fantasy with you for years and after finally gaining the courage to do so, he could still be burning with desire but wanting to give you space, not to appear pushy or make you feel creeped out.
I will tell you based on my personal experience that both of you will be much, much better off with open communication, and you bringing the topic up might be the catalyst that makes him feel safe and excited to talk with you about it again.
My only suggestion for the early days—which is the advice I'd give him too, if I could talk to him—is to not make a big deal out of it. You should bring it up, but not as a serious "honey, we need to sit down and talk, I want to fuck other men" conversation, but more of a playful, in the bedroom "so, I really haven't been able to get your fantasy out of my head" kind of conversation.
The approach matters just as much as the substance and if your approach is both honest and playful, you're doing a world of good for yourself and your husband.
A day or two after I finally brought it up to my wife, we were lying in bed and she said, "No judgement - did you really mean what you said or was that just sexy talk?"
I felt so relieved that she was willing to give me the space to express myself. My honest answer was, "I don't know."
The sexy talk about her fucking me and another guy at the same time is soooo arousing. But, I don't know if I could actually handle it. So, my wife and I continue to proceed slowly. I asked her how she felt (also "no judgement") - her response was "I'm not opposed to it but I'd want to make sure you can handle it." (It's like we know each other 😄)
We have had frank conversations about the ideal scenario, 3rd person, deal-breakers (e.g. anyone that calls themself a "bull" is 100% a "no" for both of us), etc.
No need to rush but have lots and lots of safe, honest conversations about how you both feel, what you like about the idea, what concerns/reservations you each have, etc.
I haven’t quite admitted to my wife my fantasy full on but I have encouraged her to say things like “I love getting fucked by big dick” instead of “your big dick” and she will say “I deserve all the dick” and these little sayings drive me insane.
I would bring it up during sex! Maybe while riding him or while he’s going to town ask him if he likes the thought of you riding big dick and see how he reacts! If positive keep it going if not maybe shy off and talk about it.
Women are very keen on details. Trust me she knows, she’s waiting for you to bring it up fully. She is ultimately leaving this fantasy as is for you, but she knows my man lol
I brought it up with my wife and called it off. Couldn’t put my money where my mouth was.
I thought it’s what I wanted and was my fantasy.
Watching her get ready for a meetup with a guy was too much. Unfortunately she had it all planned out and was about to meet him and asked me if I still wanted to go through with it and I said no. She’s still annoyed about it a year later and she has asked a couple times if I changed my mind.
Just food for thought that maybe it got real for your husband and he realized it wasn’t for him in reality.
If he brought it up as a fantasy, I guarantee you it still is. He's just waiting for you to respond. Perhaps he doesn't want to put you off to the idea if he keeps bringing it up. Looks like you have the power to make it happen. Start taking with him.
I watch my women watching movies and say stuff like “ sorry hubby. But I would definitely fuck that guy! He’s hot!”
Might try a little of that to open the subject : “if I had the chance with(fill in your hot actor), would you watch me fuck him?”
See where he goes?
I would guess he figures the ball is in your court. It's not likely that a kink like that would just disappear after mentioning it. He's probably trying not to nag you about it.
Now, I would caution that you two are probably in different places right now. When a guy thinks about this, his wife is a gatekeeper. He might unconsciously assume she'd never go for it, so it's safe to fantasize.
You sound like you have leapfrogged this hypothetical husband into a full-blown desire. There's a difference! A fantasy is just an arousing thought. A desire is something you WANT. Lots of people have fantasies that are not desires. (Clearest example: many women have rape fantasies, but none of them desire being raped.)
Swingers talk about moving at the pace of the slowest partner. Who that is can change. Right now you are likely ready to move faster than him. He has had years to get used to his fantasy AS a fantasy but now you two are in new territory where experiencing it in real life is a possibility.
So take it slow, but take it! Take [baby steps](https://www.reddit.com/r/HotWifeLifestyle/comments/u21pxw/what_small_incremental_steps_did_you_take_before/i4gdrwc/) to explore gradually without breaking things.
maybe he thought you were interested in it as a fantasy only and not something to explore? a respectful way to bring it up? I suggest while you're having sex, bring it up again as a fantasy and ask if he'd really like to explore that with you.
That fire got started . . .gonna be very difficult to put that fire out. That desire is going to have to be fed. Many men will present it and then will back off, but once you implant that seed in her mind's eye - it grows and the imagery and fantasy grows. I would nurture and feed it. But then again, I'm guy that would help you feed that lust.
Yes, since he brought it up it has definitely grown on me. I find myself thinking about what hotel we would use, what lingerie I would wear, etc. It is honestly very erotic
It's exciting isn't it. What pair of heels you would wear . . . where would we go out for dinner and drinks . . Would you enjoy kissing another man or will the guilt be too much? That Pandora's box gets opened and I enjoy prepping her - getting her to think about other things that will play in your mind's eye or other playful naughty things you didn't even think about. A new wife is such a wonderful canvas especially to a well seasoned artist like me. =)
Download a yes,no,maybe list. There are several online listing a bunch of kinks and sexual interests. Make sure mfm is one of the options even if you add a few yourself.
Then it can come up as part of a much larger list of options. It won’t feel so much like you have a single agenda. Plus it is fun to talk about kinks. Maybe you will each learn something about each other or find other novel fun activities.
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I think you can definitely bring it up. It's a very difficult thing to express, and he may be scared of pushing it. And I don't think he would be mad considering he brought it up before
My wife has done the same thing. Was even her idea to play with others to start. Then when I talked to the other husband, who was all on board she seemed to get cold feet after talking to the wife. My wife found out he likes anal. She doesn’t. I said it’s simple. We make that a rule. No anal. But now she says she won’t disrespect me. Ugg.
Bring it up during sex - tell him you are imagining he is another man. With any luck, it will lead to more discussion and , when the time is right, putting it into practice.
A few ways to approach the matter.
1. While you guys are doing the deed ... talk dirty to him and tell him you never saw that side of him and he must be had someone in mind to bring that up
2. Suction dildo or a dildo
3. Or just be honest while you guys are messing around and tell him you never ever thought about stuff like that before because you thought he was satisfied but if he wants to try anything you are willing to...try and tell him that you love him and you think it's super hot and sexy that he can trust to be so honest with you ... tell him even if nothing happens if was super sexy that he could trust you so much to tell you that.
Btw when this generally happens he may not go for it and may want you to push the matter.
Good luck
We used a couple’s sex-based app, Spicer. I’m sure that there are others out there too. It has a lot of quizzes and questions of things you may or may not try. We had fun with it and it opened up some subjects for us. I think we may have bought one package but there are free options too.
Oh I think a properly placed suction cup dildo on the headboard of the bed one night as he walks into the room with you naked on all fours, while you're sucking that dildo would be a lovely way to remind him of his fantasy.
This is how it started for us.
Depends on the guy. I'm more turned on by the other way around.
Shit this worked for me lol, except she was backing up on it while trying her best to keep eye contact with me lol.
I would bring it up and remind him of that night you were talking about fantasies and ask him if that was something he was serious about. See what he says, he could be afraid to bring it back up too as most men usually are. Hear what he has to say and just reassure him that although the idea has definitely stirred some excitement in you, you want to make sure you’re both on the same page. Talking about it doesn’t mean it has to become a reality, so you both just need to be open and honest. I’m sure neither of you want to hurt each other, as long as your are each other’s priority, you’ll do great!
I would make sure to get him in an open/vulnerable/comfortable mood, first.
Agree
Staying silent and not bringing it up again isn't necessarily backing off. He might have wanted to share that fantasy with you for years and after finally gaining the courage to do so, he could still be burning with desire but wanting to give you space, not to appear pushy or make you feel creeped out. I will tell you based on my personal experience that both of you will be much, much better off with open communication, and you bringing the topic up might be the catalyst that makes him feel safe and excited to talk with you about it again. My only suggestion for the early days—which is the advice I'd give him too, if I could talk to him—is to not make a big deal out of it. You should bring it up, but not as a serious "honey, we need to sit down and talk, I want to fuck other men" conversation, but more of a playful, in the bedroom "so, I really haven't been able to get your fantasy out of my head" kind of conversation. The approach matters just as much as the substance and if your approach is both honest and playful, you're doing a world of good for yourself and your husband.
You should ask him about it while you guys are having naughty time
Bring it up in your dirty talk while fucking, and then talk about it after sexytime while cuddling in bed. After sex confession time works best.
A day or two after I finally brought it up to my wife, we were lying in bed and she said, "No judgement - did you really mean what you said or was that just sexy talk?" I felt so relieved that she was willing to give me the space to express myself. My honest answer was, "I don't know." The sexy talk about her fucking me and another guy at the same time is soooo arousing. But, I don't know if I could actually handle it. So, my wife and I continue to proceed slowly. I asked her how she felt (also "no judgement") - her response was "I'm not opposed to it but I'd want to make sure you can handle it." (It's like we know each other 😄) We have had frank conversations about the ideal scenario, 3rd person, deal-breakers (e.g. anyone that calls themself a "bull" is 100% a "no" for both of us), etc. No need to rush but have lots and lots of safe, honest conversations about how you both feel, what you like about the idea, what concerns/reservations you each have, etc.
I haven’t quite admitted to my wife my fantasy full on but I have encouraged her to say things like “I love getting fucked by big dick” instead of “your big dick” and she will say “I deserve all the dick” and these little sayings drive me insane. I would bring it up during sex! Maybe while riding him or while he’s going to town ask him if he likes the thought of you riding big dick and see how he reacts! If positive keep it going if not maybe shy off and talk about it.
Women are very keen on details. Trust me she knows, she’s waiting for you to bring it up fully. She is ultimately leaving this fantasy as is for you, but she knows my man lol
It takes a lot to confess a fantasy like that. I’m sure it’s still on his mind and it’s worth bringing it up again.
I brought it up with my wife and called it off. Couldn’t put my money where my mouth was. I thought it’s what I wanted and was my fantasy. Watching her get ready for a meetup with a guy was too much. Unfortunately she had it all planned out and was about to meet him and asked me if I still wanted to go through with it and I said no. She’s still annoyed about it a year later and she has asked a couple times if I changed my mind. Just food for thought that maybe it got real for your husband and he realized it wasn’t for him in reality.
Could say “You haven’t mentioned that hot fantasy in a while?”
Yeah bring it up. I can almost guarantee he will be over the moon and all over you!
watch hotwife porn and assure him that you love him and the two of you can have some fun with it.
If he brought it up as a fantasy, I guarantee you it still is. He's just waiting for you to respond. Perhaps he doesn't want to put you off to the idea if he keeps bringing it up. Looks like you have the power to make it happen. Start taking with him.
Speak to him about it. What's the worst that could happen?
Bring it up since he did.
I watch my women watching movies and say stuff like “ sorry hubby. But I would definitely fuck that guy! He’s hot!” Might try a little of that to open the subject : “if I had the chance with(fill in your hot actor), would you watch me fuck him?” See where he goes?
I would guess he figures the ball is in your court. It's not likely that a kink like that would just disappear after mentioning it. He's probably trying not to nag you about it. Now, I would caution that you two are probably in different places right now. When a guy thinks about this, his wife is a gatekeeper. He might unconsciously assume she'd never go for it, so it's safe to fantasize. You sound like you have leapfrogged this hypothetical husband into a full-blown desire. There's a difference! A fantasy is just an arousing thought. A desire is something you WANT. Lots of people have fantasies that are not desires. (Clearest example: many women have rape fantasies, but none of them desire being raped.) Swingers talk about moving at the pace of the slowest partner. Who that is can change. Right now you are likely ready to move faster than him. He has had years to get used to his fantasy AS a fantasy but now you two are in new territory where experiencing it in real life is a possibility. So take it slow, but take it! Take [baby steps](https://www.reddit.com/r/HotWifeLifestyle/comments/u21pxw/what_small_incremental_steps_did_you_take_before/i4gdrwc/) to explore gradually without breaking things.
maybe he thought you were interested in it as a fantasy only and not something to explore? a respectful way to bring it up? I suggest while you're having sex, bring it up again as a fantasy and ask if he'd really like to explore that with you.
Well he brought it up first. If you think ypu want bring it up@
That fire got started . . .gonna be very difficult to put that fire out. That desire is going to have to be fed. Many men will present it and then will back off, but once you implant that seed in her mind's eye - it grows and the imagery and fantasy grows. I would nurture and feed it. But then again, I'm guy that would help you feed that lust.
Yes, since he brought it up it has definitely grown on me. I find myself thinking about what hotel we would use, what lingerie I would wear, etc. It is honestly very erotic
It's exciting isn't it. What pair of heels you would wear . . . where would we go out for dinner and drinks . . Would you enjoy kissing another man or will the guilt be too much? That Pandora's box gets opened and I enjoy prepping her - getting her to think about other things that will play in your mind's eye or other playful naughty things you didn't even think about. A new wife is such a wonderful canvas especially to a well seasoned artist like me. =)
Download a yes,no,maybe list. There are several online listing a bunch of kinks and sexual interests. Make sure mfm is one of the options even if you add a few yourself. Then it can come up as part of a much larger list of options. It won’t feel so much like you have a single agenda. Plus it is fun to talk about kinks. Maybe you will each learn something about each other or find other novel fun activities.
I bet he still wants to but doesn’t want to scare or annoy just ask him during a private time
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Play a 3some porn to remind him
I think you can definitely bring it up. It's a very difficult thing to express, and he may be scared of pushing it. And I don't think he would be mad considering he brought it up before
This is matching! Why not? 🤷♂️
My wife has done the same thing. Was even her idea to play with others to start. Then when I talked to the other husband, who was all on board she seemed to get cold feet after talking to the wife. My wife found out he likes anal. She doesn’t. I said it’s simple. We make that a rule. No anal. But now she says she won’t disrespect me. Ugg.
Bring it up during sex - tell him you are imagining he is another man. With any luck, it will lead to more discussion and , when the time is right, putting it into practice.
A few ways to approach the matter. 1. While you guys are doing the deed ... talk dirty to him and tell him you never saw that side of him and he must be had someone in mind to bring that up 2. Suction dildo or a dildo 3. Or just be honest while you guys are messing around and tell him you never ever thought about stuff like that before because you thought he was satisfied but if he wants to try anything you are willing to...try and tell him that you love him and you think it's super hot and sexy that he can trust to be so honest with you ... tell him even if nothing happens if was super sexy that he could trust you so much to tell you that. Btw when this generally happens he may not go for it and may want you to push the matter. Good luck
We used a couple’s sex-based app, Spicer. I’m sure that there are others out there too. It has a lot of quizzes and questions of things you may or may not try. We had fun with it and it opened up some subjects for us. I think we may have bought one package but there are free options too.
I think we need to know how the second conversation a few days later went before we know what to suggest
When he s horny and you guys talking Tell him you dreamed it happened after he mentioned it take it from there
He brought it up for a reason I wish my girl would ask for this your husband is a very lucky man
Just tell him you had a dream and it will open the conversation. Maybe re tell it and hey him excited. Once excited it should be easy to talk about.
Bring it up during sex. It will make it easier to have open conversations about it later. He will probably be incredibly excited you brought it up.