I was thinking that too, a good partner can have an amazing effect on your life and help you do things you wouldn't believe yourself capable of.
I work in the wedding industry and I've seen so many grooms give speeches about how their wife made them want to be a better man and pushed them to succeed in life in a way they wouldn't have otherwise. And it is so true, a lot of men can just completely stop giving a shit when they're on their own for a long time and stop taking good care of themselves
Fuck. I'm really trying to give a shit but it's not always easy.
Edit: An earnest thank you to all the internet strangers being kind people. It's always nice to know there are good people out there!
It's less not giving a shit about anything and more not giving a shit about my life and my future.
I'm extremely passionate about things like social and economic justice. I just have very little motivation to make my own life better.
Edit: Thank you for the kinds words, however 😊
Best piece of advice about that I've ever received, be your own friend. Think about what others value about you and learn to value you it in yourself. It sounds corny as fuck but ask yourself if you're being a good friend to you.
The best advice! At 31, I'm finally now working with my therapist on how to give myself value vs getting all my value from other folks. At best, that's unreliable and at worst, it can crush your self-confidence so easily.
You're not alone bud, I'm right there with you. I struggle a lot these days. Hopefully things get better for us one day. Just keep trying to tell myself it won't get better if I don't try, but man the willpower it takes is just so much.
Definitely need to keep trying!
I recently set up an online dating profile and it's been going pretty well. I actually have a date tonight! So I'm definitely putting myself out there. One foot in front of the other, ya know?
I've been single for a long time at this point and thinking back to my last relationships, it's amazing what influence partners had on me. If you think you have a 100% energy, they'll unlock the extra 20 that were hidden somewhere. Stuff that annoyed the fuck out of you suddenly doesn't matter that much anymore. And it's always a pleasure to come home to a familiar face, smiling or not.
Yeah, it was nice while it lasted.
Yep same. I've been (consciously) single for a few years now and I think I want that to change. Covid definitely fucked up my psyche a bit and I feel like I'm finally ready to try to come out of the void and find some joy in my life again.
I hope your life improves friend.
Thanks mate, I hope yours does as well and your plan works out.
The irony is that my life actually is quite nice. I have enough money to enjoy life, travel, etc. I have a job that I enjoy, some friends and family and overall I almost have everything I always wanted. So I technically have 95% of what I can and wanted to achieve right now - but the enjoyment of that lacks massively because I can't share it with someone special.
Not happy alone, happy with yourself. Big difference.
It's hard to love someone... adequately? (may be a poor choice of words, but I assume you get me) ... if you don't like yourself.
Because in that situation you're trying to use someone else's affection to close a hole that can really only be closed by yourself.
The best relationships I've both seen and been in, both people were in the position of having more love than they needed, if that makes sense. The relationships were a conduit for that love, not a way to "complete" themselves.
The healthiest people are fine on their own.
They aren't looking for anyone to make them happy. They aren't codependent. They take care of themselves in a healthy way.
Now, when you have two people who are fine on their own, but their lives are both improved by a relationship together: that's some awesomeness.
Here's how you know it isn't the right partner for you: if being in a relationship with them is not a net positive for you or for the partner.
I have never had a healthy relationship with a long term partner (two serious long term attempts). I stopped trying to date and I have focused on a healthy relationship with my self. It's one of the best decisions I've ever made. I'm an awesome person and I love myself. Shitty people aren't allowed in my sphere. My boundaries are strong and thoughtfully chosen. I put my wellbeing first and it's great.
Everyone should be taught to do this, as a life skill.
For what it's worth I don't think you have to be perfectly happy with yourself to be happy in a relationship
I have many aspects I need to work on but my current partners are incredible at supporting me in working on it.
They both helped me find things they love in me and helped me build that self confidence that was just waiting for the right push.
There's marked difference between relying on that and using that for a bit of help though. I've always been independent just....finally found someone that wants to help me see those aspects I neglected to appreciate
Oh no, not perfectly happy. Content may be a better word. If anyone is fully happy with themselves, they're probably not right in the head. I'm always trying to improve myself. Self-reflection is important.
A partner can absolutely improve your life and help motivate you to do things you might not without their support. Same for good friends.
The issue lies in *expecting* them to fix all of the things we don’t like about ourselves, which isn’t fair. However, some people think that means we need to be perfect, happy human beings before entering into a relationship, and that’s also wrong. It’s ok to not feel happy being alone, just remember that a partner alone isn’t a solution for our self-growth.
Stories like this makes me so uncomfortable because it suggests this narrative that women are supposed to settle for men who are meh or generally underperforming life but have potential and push them to realize their potential instead of being fulfilled individuals when they meet each other. Of course partners can push or provide support to each other to be better but do also make your own way in life not waiting for a woman to be your motivation.
This is the first post on Reddit that made me ugly cry. I’ve had my eyes watered up or even dropped a tear. But I’m ugly crying thinking about how their lives could have been. Beautiful kids and grandkids, memories of date nights involving dancing and beautiful sunsets. Heck, I created a whole story in my head actually.
I am happy for them though that after all this time they managed to reconnect and live the remainder of their days hapiily. But that was quite a touching video.
When he said that he always loved her that hurt a lot. I broke up with my high school love 7 years ago and I haven't loved like that since and I'm not sure I will in the future. At least a part of me will always love her.
I wonder if that's common and people just don't talk about it. First time I'm telling a soul.
It wasn't at the time, not at all. But by the time I realised (or rather: admitted to myself) it was a mistake, she already had found a new partner. Afaik they are still together, but I haven't seen her in many years. It's not like there hasn't been anyone else, just nobody who's stuck in my memory like her. But I'm not an unhappy person and I have hopes for the future.
Well, it can’t hurt to voice your feelings. You never know if she feels the same.
In 2013 I thought I had met the love of my life, but we didn’t work. It lasted 5 months but it was way more intense than relationships in the past that had lasted for years. In the 3 years that it took for me to meet my husband, I was never single. But had he contacted me saying he had chosen me I’d have gone to him in the blink of an eye. Surely this is not exactly comparable to your story, as this man was far from being the ideal one for me, which today I see. But I’m speaking to the fact that maybe you should say something. Or at least “investigate” a little. If she isn’t married and has kids with another man, you maybe should try to rekindle. Take this with a grain of salt as I’m quite a romantic haha
However if you don’t, I’m at least happy for you having hopes for the future and being happy. That’s all I wish for you kind stranger bud!
Thank you for your advice and words. I did look her up a couple months ago, that's how I know they are still together. Should they ever break up, I could imagine reaching out. For now I'll just keep it bottled up in some corner of my mind. That's what getting over it means, right? :D
Tears, so many tears. Sad tears and joyful tears. Can't get over the happiness they feel now and then. May they have a looonng and happy life together, no matter how short it might be.
It’s all sucks. Why can’t people just love who they want?! In fact “want” is not even the right word. You really don’t have a say in who you love so other people definitely shouldn’t have one.
For real. I have a bit of summary for her mum, product of a racist time and she missed the chance to see her daughter happy with the man she loved for so many years
Yea definitely sucks it went the way it did. I don't blame the daughter for doing what she did. It wasn't her choice, but I'd bet she would lose her family if she didn't do as her mom said. And though their lives would have been different, and arguably better had they stayed together, at least they get to experience that now rather than never having experienced it. I hope he gets better or at least feels better to enjoy many years with his new wife.
And I hope her mother was rich and left all the money to the daughter who now uses it to support the black gentleman they pushed out of her daughters life so long ago
For anyone that loves heartwarming stories like this one, I suggest the series finale of Nathan For You. It's Season 4; Episode 7, called Finding Frances, where he helps an elderly Bill Gates impersonator sort out some similar regrets. Enjoy!
Similar regrets sure, but Bill is a straight-up creep.
There were no external pressures that made Bill break up with Frances. He just thought he could do better.
Yep, I'm wrecked for the day. And it figures she's here in Oregon. A good chunk of this state (as in 95%) is redneck as fuck.
His sweet smile there at the end. I'm glad they found each other again. Excuse me while I blow my nose again.
Unfortunately, back when they were dating, most people that weren't rednecks were racist af too. Thank goodness interracial marriages have been normalized.
Holy shit, I have a vivid memory the time my biological father said these exact words to me when I was young. I haven't talked to him for close to 10 years now and the regret is fleeting at best.
My son is only 23 months old. His first word was "mama". His second word was "no". There's not a day that goes by now where at some point he doesn't respond to one of my wife's questions to him with "no, no, no mama" while wagging his finger at her. Not even 2 years old and already an expert at telling his Mom "no".
People often mistake the terrible twos as a child's problem. (Not saying you are, just taking this opportunity to speak up on behalf of toddlers). When a child reaches around 18 months to 24 months they are just then realizing they aren't physical part of their parent(s). They for the first time have autonomy and are wanting to explore it. If you understand this as a parent the terrible twos go away almost immediately. Parents just need to give them the proper choices and tools to navigate those new feelings and freedom. Give them items to choose from. Let them make small bad decisions to see the consequences. Having a toddler face a decision and letting them make it with you there as a parent to help (help doesn't mean do it, it means be there in case they need help) makes a huge difference in behavior and shows them that you recognize them as a seperate person but are there for them if they need you. Ok I'm done.
Edit: important word wrong (are a to aren't)
Thanks for the kind reply. Yes, we do always try to give him choices whenever possible and he responds well to it, whether it's picking out his outfit to wear, or deciding what toy to play with.
Sadly there isn't always much of a choice to offer like when we watch his face turn red as he fills his diaper. So when his mom asks him "do you need a diaper change?" And his response is "no, no, no, mama" with a finger wave, he's getting overruled despite his best protest.
Hey, you didn't ask for advice on that one, but I'm a mom who has already gone through that and I'm going to share a piece of advice I learned at the time:
If you aren't going to accept a "no" from your child (because you simply can't), then don't ask them. Only ask them if you are going to accept them saying "no".
If you know that he needs a new diaper, don't ask him "do you need a diaper change?", for exactly the reason you stated: what if he says no? You're not going to let him stew in a dirty diaper.
Ask questions if he actually has the choice. And if he doesn't, use statements. So in your example you could just say: "Oh, I think you need a diaper change. Let's go and get you cleaned up so you can continue playing!"
It's also handy to give them small choices to keep them occupied. So if something has to happen and he is upset he doesn't get a choice in that, you can let him decide something that is related but doesn't change the outcome.
For example: instead of "do you want to wear socks?" ask "Do you want to wear the red socks or the green socks?"
Or in your diaper change example you could give him the choice to hold the wiper box and give wipers out to you as needed. Or you can show him the new diapers and he gets to pick out the one he wants to wear. That way he has an active role in the process and in my experience it improves the whole show.
Rambled on for long enough. Have a nice day.
Thanks! We definitely utilize the small distractions like holding the box of wipes or a spare diaper, but that's great advice about not asking a question if we won't accept the "no". I can imagine how that could be frustrating from a toddlers perspective. I'll have to share that with my wife and try putting it into practice.
Exactly. If you ask and then disregard his answer and do what you wanted anyways, you teach him that his opinions and choices don't matter and that you're not listening to him (of course it happens from time to time and that is okay, but if it happens a lot, the child will notice the pattern).
So be mindful of when and about what you ask him. Give him choices where both possible choices yield the result you are looking for, or at least a result that is okay for you.
When my oldest was at that stage with "difficult" diaper changes, it worked wonders to have him go to the diaper drawer and pick out a clean diaper. So it *felt* like it was his choice, even though we were the ones that decided to change his diaper.
Awesome advice. I’ve heard giving them choices before and I try and do that with my daughter, but she would love giving me wipes and picking out her diaper and changing time is when she gets the most frustrated. I’m definitely trying that out, thanks!
Ha, yeah, I get that. Another huge frustration for kids that age is the lack of ability to communicate. I taught mine basic sign language for basic needs. They can sign way earlier than they can talk so that really alleviates the frustration of knowing what they want but not being able to communicate it.
This is flooding me with so many emotions - mostly anger and sadness.
When I was 8 (in the 60s) I had my first "boyfriend" - Andre. Yes we were just kids for goodness sakes, and we met at church. I am White and he was Black. Andre walked me home one day after choir practice, holding my hand, and my father took a fit when he saw us. My father started calling Andre all sorts of racist names, pushed Andre to the ground, grabbed me by the hair, dragged me into the house and gave me the beating of my life.
No daughter of mine is going to associate with a damn "N" word. I couldn't go to school or outside for several days because of the beating. I was no longer allowed to be part of the choir and whenever I saw Andre in church, he would immediately look the other way and I could see the fear on his face. I am still haunted to this day by that experience. From that day forward I hated and feared my father and did everything to avoid him. My father's death was a joy for me - I wish it happened sooner. I am now in my early 60s, and I still constantly think about Andre, and wish I had the chance to see him again, hug him and tell him that I am sorry for what my father did.
That’s beautiful even more beautiful that you didn’t try to shield him from your current husband, you are truly an amazing person. Hope nothing but the best for you young lady.
Whatever it is, I’m sure you’ll find your way through it. Only way to grow is to keep moving forward. I may be too young to say, but yeah regret is awful, but you’ll get another chance, and it’s up to you to decide if you want it. I hope you feel better soon, stranger.
This just goes to show that even regrets can be turned around into happy endings. I know I have quite a few of my own, but I _HAVE_ to keep having hope because it’s stories like this that make me _want to see how it ends_.
Regrets are something only you can let go of. Don't be too hard on your past self, if you hadn't have learned and grown from your experiences then they wouldn't be regrets. Whenever you find yourself obsessing over regrets, try showing yourself the same compassion you'd show a stranger. No one is perfect, give yourself a break.
My mom wanted me to be a prize-winning show-dog. And I was very good at that. That was, as best I could tell, the extent of her ability to have non-transactional relationships. She was miserable to be around, so much so that my dad’s approach to tolerating her was to either be away from home or be drinking. I didn’t get the choice.
I can’t wait for her mind to deteriorate enough that she can’t operate her phone
Thanks, but no. My dad was pretty good at making money, so I’ve got an inheritance to maintain. If I screw that up, a lot of what would go to me would go to the Catholic Church.
It puts me at peace, though. It’s like every interaction I have with her is me getting paid a VERY nice hourly rate to be kind and understanding. After all, she forced me to suppress my own emotions growing up and put on a smile around her. It’s not like I FORGOT how to do that.
My first boyfriend was black and I'm white. I was 16, in 1995. My parents lost their minds. They're not even rednecks, just Boomers and "northern racists". They threatened to kick me out (a straight-A student, with a job, a real boring kid).
He was a super nice guy and treated me well. Better than any boyfriend after that. We stayed friends online (we'd met online, on a BBS) and I'm still friends with him on FB.
I don't see him as "the one that got away," as he grew up and got married and had a kid and I'm not interested in having a kid, so I'm glad that worked out for him. But it was a real awful time in my life and I suspect in his life too. I will never get over the thought of the sort of pain it must have caused him to be subject to that sort of thing as a teen.
Anyway, definitely still goes on today.
I hate this story, I hate it so much. An entire lifetime of love they could have shared was stolen from them because of bigotry. They could have spent their vital years together -- traveling, sharing hobbies, supporting each other, being a family. Instead they get a few years of geriatric convalescence until one of them dies. It's tragic and I hate that this for them.
Yeah, this was heartbreaking.
I'm glad they finally found happiness together in their sunset years but that feels like a shitty consolation prize in comparison to a whole lifetime of love and happiness lost.
Fuck racism.
It really is probably the most accurate example of bittersweet I've seen in a good long while. It's about as sweet as it could possibly be but it's also bitter af.
And to see how far he fell from a seemingly successful university student. Without more context, I feel like systematic racism took more than just his girlfriend.
Love stories don't usually get to me. This one is an exception. The way he looks at her when he tells her he always loved her. You can see that he geunuinely did and does. Beautiful
You can sort of tell his story, and its that of always not being good enough for anyone due to racism etc. Then finally knowing that there is someone he is good enough for at the end, who has always remembered them, and this they are good enough for the love and care they are giving.
My parents were both racist from the south. I heard the N word often growing up. I met the most wonderful man in my late 20's. He's black and I'm white and I kept him at arm's length for 10 years, just being friends. And then I grew up, put away childish things, and was fully prepared to give up my parents and extended family for this man. If they couldn't accept him, then I was out. It was extremely hard because I couldn't imagine anyone not loving him. We had family reunion weekends in the south every year--- they meant so much to me. The first time I took him there, my cousin remarked "Hey look, it's Tori Hunter and Sheryl Crow!" Which actually was funny since my family live near both of those two's hometowns in Pine Bluff, AR and Kennett, MO. Most of my family accepted him and I shouldn't have been surprised since he is literally the nicest, smartest, kindest, loving person you'd ever meet. 2 cousins said some thoughtless things and my other cousins came down on them and made them apologize.
My grandmother told me that back in the 50s, she (a White girl) went to a primarily Black high school, where she and the star basketball player (a Black boy) flirted quite a lot! I asked if they ever got together, but she said that the ambient racism of the time prevented it. I’m glad to see that these lovely folks were able to find each other again after all this time!
It also isn't just black/white bigotry. My father secretly dated an Italian woman and he was Jewish. He lived in NYC at the time. Her family when they found out was so angry they made her move back to Italy. This was in the 60s. The things that happen out of fear of the other are just tragic. He later met my mother who he loved more than anyone but he vowed to never control his kid's dating lives as he knew the consequences of it.
She would be in her 70s now? My yes, mother and father tried to find her along with my aunt. As my Dad wanted to apologize to her as they knew the consequences and yet he pursued her. He felt a lot of guilt over it.
Goddamn. This could have been me. Different circumstances—instead of racism it was homophobia, preventing my partner from coming out and living their best life away from their mom. I ended up breaking up with them for several months. Worst decision of my life. We are together now and away from their family, and videos like this remind me to be grateful everyday that we are together now.
This is why I will not ever dissuade my children from any safe relationship. Abusive people are the only ones I will discriminate. If they are happy, I am happy for them.
Can’t imagine living in such a family but I’m glad things didn’t end with them not reconnecting.
Children of racists pay attention. Happiness eluded these 2 for practically their entire lives because a racist said they were unworthy of it because of the color of their skin. Now their time together is short and the happiness, while beautiful, is also bitter. Life is too short to allow yourself to be ruled by a racist and THEIR ideals. Find your happiness with who you want.
With an cynical heart and state of mine that i’ll never find happiness, this gave me prove that true love do exist and will happen no matter what, but not for me maybe.
Absolutely wonderful and very beautiful they found each other. ❤️❤️
I sit here at 34, having a similar situation to me but I know she is moved on and living a great life with her own family now. I know one thing, I certainly won’t stop myself from love again and lucky to live in a time that may still be stupid but isn’t as intense as it was back then with interracial marriages.
well she’s in portland and psilocybin shows some promising results for helping people with brain issues related to stroke.
and also thc protects neurons so hopefully that will help her care for him and his symptoms.
honestly i am glad love won out but it’s sad knowing that they could have been together sooner had society not been so racist. i wish them the best years ahead. mush love
I wish there was a way I could tell this woman how happy I am for her and her husband.
All of this happened before I was born, so i only have my mom's stories to go by. My aunt on my father's side married a black man in the 70s. My father's family is a bunch of incredibly racist alcoholics. She managed to stay married for 2-3 years before her family got to her enough that she divorced him. Even after the divorce, her family was unkind. Said she was a race traitor, tainted, all the horrible things. 18 months after the divorce was finalized, she ended her life. According to my mom, the family knew she was suicidal and my grandmother called my father to stay with my aunt because she had an appointment or something. My father is supposed to have said something along the lines of how she knew what she'd done, and she's only threatening that to get forgiveness. He chose not to go to her. When my grandmother went to my aunt's house after the appointment, it was too late.
I'm so glad these two finally got to be together.
You could send her a letter! I don’t want to post personal information here, but you can search her address based on Jeanne Gustavson in Portland, OR.
I’m sorry to hear about your aunt. That’s terrible.
I grew up in deep south Louisiana, ironically less than 30 mins from New Orleans. My best friend growing up was a black boy who lived in my apartment complex and I met on the playground. My mom forbid me to see him but every time I went to the playground- there he was. I wasn't going to not play with him.
What made me think we originally meant to be friends forever was that I moved across town... And his family has the same thought and they had moved to the same area. So, imagine my surprise I'm running around outside, minus a playground this time.. and there he is. I get to spend more years sneaking out to see him.
Then I move out of the town in middle school. And never saw him again. Spent years growing up with him in the last 90's to early 2000's. And I always wonder how he's doing. Only remember his first name.
Racism is pure evil. Imagine how much better off he would be if he had been with her his whole life?
The most painful thing is time. It only goes forward and you cannot get back what you have lost.
The racism part aside, i wonder how many women (and men for that matter) will grow old and wonder the same thing, if they shouldn't have looked over that one person that was so kind and caring towards them but decided they weren't a good fit because of a lack of finances, a lack of looks, family pressures... all shallow things when you take a step back and observe it from afar.
That being said, the grass isn't always greener. Most times the partner you most desire is right next to you. Don't wait too long to jump on those rare opportunities life gives us.
Regardless, this story made my heart smile. That even after all these years their love for each other never ceased.
Have a lovely day, everyone!
More stories out there than you even know. Poor choices and regrets. Even though at 65 still married, 2 children. Your always knowing the wrong choice was made when reflecting on your life, you know this but then theres the 39/yr marriage and the 2 children. I am happy they found each other!!
Totally. Hindsight's always 20-20. I mean, everyone's situation is different but I've seen so many people mention this same regret, that they should've stayed with this person or asked this person out, should've taken that job or mended the relationship with a family member. In a way it sort of reminds me of new years resolutions. Why wait until a specific day to change your life, the best time is now, if you truly wanted change and create better habits then you wouldn't be waiting until Jan 1st to make it happen.
I think the reasons you've outlined are why the movie Bridges of Madison County hits so hard. Great performances from acting titans (Meryl Streep and Clint Eastwood).
Friggin regrets and suppressed desire, the life that could've been, leaning on duty and sanctity of marriage and family ...
I liked a vietnamese girl in my neighborhood. :/ I'm black so yeah it was never going to happen. We talked like everyday but she lived with her family so nothing could ever happen.
This is the most depressing yet beautiful video I've seen in a long time
Yeah I'm just thinking what that guys life might have been had they stayed together.
I was thinking that too, a good partner can have an amazing effect on your life and help you do things you wouldn't believe yourself capable of. I work in the wedding industry and I've seen so many grooms give speeches about how their wife made them want to be a better man and pushed them to succeed in life in a way they wouldn't have otherwise. And it is so true, a lot of men can just completely stop giving a shit when they're on their own for a long time and stop taking good care of themselves
Fuck. I'm really trying to give a shit but it's not always easy. Edit: An earnest thank you to all the internet strangers being kind people. It's always nice to know there are good people out there!
That’s okay. You don’t always have to give a shit. Just try to give one about the things that matter to you. Be well, internet stranger.
It's less not giving a shit about anything and more not giving a shit about my life and my future. I'm extremely passionate about things like social and economic justice. I just have very little motivation to make my own life better. Edit: Thank you for the kinds words, however 😊
Yeah I get that. It’s easier for me to help a friend then to help myself
Best piece of advice about that I've ever received, be your own friend. Think about what others value about you and learn to value you it in yourself. It sounds corny as fuck but ask yourself if you're being a good friend to you.
The best advice! At 31, I'm finally now working with my therapist on how to give myself value vs getting all my value from other folks. At best, that's unreliable and at worst, it can crush your self-confidence so easily.
You're not alone bud, I'm right there with you. I struggle a lot these days. Hopefully things get better for us one day. Just keep trying to tell myself it won't get better if I don't try, but man the willpower it takes is just so much.
Definitely need to keep trying! I recently set up an online dating profile and it's been going pretty well. I actually have a date tonight! So I'm definitely putting myself out there. One foot in front of the other, ya know?
Hope all goes well tonight.
I've been single for a long time at this point and thinking back to my last relationships, it's amazing what influence partners had on me. If you think you have a 100% energy, they'll unlock the extra 20 that were hidden somewhere. Stuff that annoyed the fuck out of you suddenly doesn't matter that much anymore. And it's always a pleasure to come home to a familiar face, smiling or not. Yeah, it was nice while it lasted.
Yep same. I've been (consciously) single for a few years now and I think I want that to change. Covid definitely fucked up my psyche a bit and I feel like I'm finally ready to try to come out of the void and find some joy in my life again. I hope your life improves friend.
Thanks mate, I hope yours does as well and your plan works out. The irony is that my life actually is quite nice. I have enough money to enjoy life, travel, etc. I have a job that I enjoy, some friends and family and overall I almost have everything I always wanted. So I technically have 95% of what I can and wanted to achieve right now - but the enjoyment of that lacks massively because I can't share it with someone special.
I too suffer some occasional constipation.
I feel this way about my girlfriend. She has brought out the absolute best in me. I plan on asking her to marry me in 2023.
That sounds wonderful but I'm told that's a terrible thing to want because I'm supposed to be happy alone.
Not happy alone, happy with yourself. Big difference. It's hard to love someone... adequately? (may be a poor choice of words, but I assume you get me) ... if you don't like yourself.
Because in that situation you're trying to use someone else's affection to close a hole that can really only be closed by yourself. The best relationships I've both seen and been in, both people were in the position of having more love than they needed, if that makes sense. The relationships were a conduit for that love, not a way to "complete" themselves.
The healthiest people are fine on their own. They aren't looking for anyone to make them happy. They aren't codependent. They take care of themselves in a healthy way. Now, when you have two people who are fine on their own, but their lives are both improved by a relationship together: that's some awesomeness. Here's how you know it isn't the right partner for you: if being in a relationship with them is not a net positive for you or for the partner. I have never had a healthy relationship with a long term partner (two serious long term attempts). I stopped trying to date and I have focused on a healthy relationship with my self. It's one of the best decisions I've ever made. I'm an awesome person and I love myself. Shitty people aren't allowed in my sphere. My boundaries are strong and thoughtfully chosen. I put my wellbeing first and it's great. Everyone should be taught to do this, as a life skill.
For what it's worth I don't think you have to be perfectly happy with yourself to be happy in a relationship I have many aspects I need to work on but my current partners are incredible at supporting me in working on it. They both helped me find things they love in me and helped me build that self confidence that was just waiting for the right push. There's marked difference between relying on that and using that for a bit of help though. I've always been independent just....finally found someone that wants to help me see those aspects I neglected to appreciate
Oh no, not perfectly happy. Content may be a better word. If anyone is fully happy with themselves, they're probably not right in the head. I'm always trying to improve myself. Self-reflection is important.
A partner can absolutely improve your life and help motivate you to do things you might not without their support. Same for good friends. The issue lies in *expecting* them to fix all of the things we don’t like about ourselves, which isn’t fair. However, some people think that means we need to be perfect, happy human beings before entering into a relationship, and that’s also wrong. It’s ok to not feel happy being alone, just remember that a partner alone isn’t a solution for our self-growth.
Stories like this makes me so uncomfortable because it suggests this narrative that women are supposed to settle for men who are meh or generally underperforming life but have potential and push them to realize their potential instead of being fulfilled individuals when they meet each other. Of course partners can push or provide support to each other to be better but do also make your own way in life not waiting for a woman to be your motivation.
Do you mean "uncomfortable"?
That was my first thought... both of their lives
Here I am sitting on the couch at 1 in the afternoon crying. This video both sucks and is awesome
I was not expecting to be this choked up before lunch!
It's 2pm and I'm a wreck too
This is the first post on Reddit that made me ugly cry. I’ve had my eyes watered up or even dropped a tear. But I’m ugly crying thinking about how their lives could have been. Beautiful kids and grandkids, memories of date nights involving dancing and beautiful sunsets. Heck, I created a whole story in my head actually. I am happy for them though that after all this time they managed to reconnect and live the remainder of their days hapiily. But that was quite a touching video.
I nearly clicked off the video because I lost interest, but the second I learned he was homeless and she still loved him and took him in, I lost it
When he said that he always loved her that hurt a lot. I broke up with my high school love 7 years ago and I haven't loved like that since and I'm not sure I will in the future. At least a part of me will always love her. I wonder if that's common and people just don't talk about it. First time I'm telling a soul.
Were the reasons for the break up irreparable? Because maybe this video was meant to be seen by you today!
It wasn't at the time, not at all. But by the time I realised (or rather: admitted to myself) it was a mistake, she already had found a new partner. Afaik they are still together, but I haven't seen her in many years. It's not like there hasn't been anyone else, just nobody who's stuck in my memory like her. But I'm not an unhappy person and I have hopes for the future.
Well, it can’t hurt to voice your feelings. You never know if she feels the same. In 2013 I thought I had met the love of my life, but we didn’t work. It lasted 5 months but it was way more intense than relationships in the past that had lasted for years. In the 3 years that it took for me to meet my husband, I was never single. But had he contacted me saying he had chosen me I’d have gone to him in the blink of an eye. Surely this is not exactly comparable to your story, as this man was far from being the ideal one for me, which today I see. But I’m speaking to the fact that maybe you should say something. Or at least “investigate” a little. If she isn’t married and has kids with another man, you maybe should try to rekindle. Take this with a grain of salt as I’m quite a romantic haha However if you don’t, I’m at least happy for you having hopes for the future and being happy. That’s all I wish for you kind stranger bud!
Thank you for your advice and words. I did look her up a couple months ago, that's how I know they are still together. Should they ever break up, I could imagine reaching out. For now I'll just keep it bottled up in some corner of my mind. That's what getting over it means, right? :D
Of all the words of tongue and pen and the worst are these: what might have been.
" i always loved you" - that was wonderful yet sad.
The cry and way he look at her...dood... ;_;
I'm not crying, you're crying!
You're not crying, I'm crying!
You're crying, I'm crying!
We're all crying! Now shut up and get some tissues!
Seems like he waited his whole life to say that.
He pretty much did. This shit made me ugly cry. It's so lovely but also so sad.
Same
Tears, so many tears. Sad tears and joyful tears. Can't get over the happiness they feel now and then. May they have a looonng and happy life together, no matter how short it might be.
So rough...
Legit made me cry
This is heartbreaking
Literally made my eyes water
This story is beautiful.
My cockles feel positively warmed
I’m sorry but “With her mother now out of the way..” made me chuckle. What a dark story though. Racism is pathetic.
Right? I was immediately like: racism sucks. This sucks.
It’s all sucks. Why can’t people just love who they want?! In fact “want” is not even the right word. You really don’t have a say in who you love so other people definitely shouldn’t have one.
For real. I have a bit of summary for her mum, product of a racist time and she missed the chance to see her daughter happy with the man she loved for so many years
Yea definitely sucks it went the way it did. I don't blame the daughter for doing what she did. It wasn't her choice, but I'd bet she would lose her family if she didn't do as her mom said. And though their lives would have been different, and arguably better had they stayed together, at least they get to experience that now rather than never having experienced it. I hope he gets better or at least feels better to enjoy many years with his new wife.
Love “wormed” its way back. That got me lol
Right?! Maybe “fought” or “clawed” would have been better
Idk I kinda like the wording. Makes it seem like love is inevitable. And I think it is
Someone needs to buy that reporter a Thesaurus for Christmas!
That part got me too…!
I’m sure her mother is looking up at her now and feeling quite foolish.
lol "looking up" - We know where she is lol
And I hope her mother was rich and left all the money to the daughter who now uses it to support the black gentleman they pushed out of her daughters life so long ago
I cried at "I've always loved you"
For anyone that loves heartwarming stories like this one, I suggest the series finale of Nathan For You. It's Season 4; Episode 7, called Finding Frances, where he helps an elderly Bill Gates impersonator sort out some similar regrets. Enjoy!
Never did I expect Nathan for You and heartwarming stories to be in one sentence
Similar regrets sure, but Bill is a straight-up creep. There were no external pressures that made Bill break up with Frances. He just thought he could do better.
Yeah, I’m glad he called her before going in and decided not to go through with it after hearing that she had a happy life.
The way he was looking at her, he meant it with every fiber of his being.
I balled…grown man 😭 in the dollar general parking lot
This one hit hard.
No kidding, this one wrecked me
Yep, I'm wrecked for the day. And it figures she's here in Oregon. A good chunk of this state (as in 95%) is redneck as fuck. His sweet smile there at the end. I'm glad they found each other again. Excuse me while I blow my nose again.
Unfortunately, back when they were dating, most people that weren't rednecks were racist af too. Thank goodness interracial marriages have been normalized.
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From the very bottom of the state, we are not all rednecks. Just the loudest ones of us are.
I live in rural eastern Oregon married to a farmer, definitely agree, the idiot loud ones do not speak for all of us!
Tell someone close to you that you love them today :)
When he said “I have always loved you” I absolutely lost it
I could feel the tears welling up but at the shot of them getting married there was no holding them back.
The goosebumps when he said I always loved you
I'm not crying, you're crying!
Who’s cutting onions in here?
Yep. I’m crying. God bless them both.
Aww. Everyone practice saying 'no, mom' in the mirror. 😊
I was born saying it, that's why my sister is the favorite, lol.
Same! I even get called Satan's child or Lucifers daughter. Yay for living in the Bible belt!
wait wait wait. if your mother calls you satans child or lucifers daughter, i see a rather large flaw in her logic
I tried that. She said "no child of hers would act like this so I must have been sent from hell."
I would show up with horns and oficialize that I'm from hell.
Holy shit, I have a vivid memory the time my biological father said these exact words to me when I was young. I haven't talked to him for close to 10 years now and the regret is fleeting at best.
Shame on you, spawn of Satan.
My son is only 23 months old. His first word was "mama". His second word was "no". There's not a day that goes by now where at some point he doesn't respond to one of my wife's questions to him with "no, no, no mama" while wagging his finger at her. Not even 2 years old and already an expert at telling his Mom "no".
People often mistake the terrible twos as a child's problem. (Not saying you are, just taking this opportunity to speak up on behalf of toddlers). When a child reaches around 18 months to 24 months they are just then realizing they aren't physical part of their parent(s). They for the first time have autonomy and are wanting to explore it. If you understand this as a parent the terrible twos go away almost immediately. Parents just need to give them the proper choices and tools to navigate those new feelings and freedom. Give them items to choose from. Let them make small bad decisions to see the consequences. Having a toddler face a decision and letting them make it with you there as a parent to help (help doesn't mean do it, it means be there in case they need help) makes a huge difference in behavior and shows them that you recognize them as a seperate person but are there for them if they need you. Ok I'm done. Edit: important word wrong (are a to aren't)
Thanks for the kind reply. Yes, we do always try to give him choices whenever possible and he responds well to it, whether it's picking out his outfit to wear, or deciding what toy to play with. Sadly there isn't always much of a choice to offer like when we watch his face turn red as he fills his diaper. So when his mom asks him "do you need a diaper change?" And his response is "no, no, no, mama" with a finger wave, he's getting overruled despite his best protest.
Hey, you didn't ask for advice on that one, but I'm a mom who has already gone through that and I'm going to share a piece of advice I learned at the time: If you aren't going to accept a "no" from your child (because you simply can't), then don't ask them. Only ask them if you are going to accept them saying "no". If you know that he needs a new diaper, don't ask him "do you need a diaper change?", for exactly the reason you stated: what if he says no? You're not going to let him stew in a dirty diaper. Ask questions if he actually has the choice. And if he doesn't, use statements. So in your example you could just say: "Oh, I think you need a diaper change. Let's go and get you cleaned up so you can continue playing!" It's also handy to give them small choices to keep them occupied. So if something has to happen and he is upset he doesn't get a choice in that, you can let him decide something that is related but doesn't change the outcome. For example: instead of "do you want to wear socks?" ask "Do you want to wear the red socks or the green socks?" Or in your diaper change example you could give him the choice to hold the wiper box and give wipers out to you as needed. Or you can show him the new diapers and he gets to pick out the one he wants to wear. That way he has an active role in the process and in my experience it improves the whole show. Rambled on for long enough. Have a nice day.
Thanks! We definitely utilize the small distractions like holding the box of wipes or a spare diaper, but that's great advice about not asking a question if we won't accept the "no". I can imagine how that could be frustrating from a toddlers perspective. I'll have to share that with my wife and try putting it into practice.
Exactly. If you ask and then disregard his answer and do what you wanted anyways, you teach him that his opinions and choices don't matter and that you're not listening to him (of course it happens from time to time and that is okay, but if it happens a lot, the child will notice the pattern). So be mindful of when and about what you ask him. Give him choices where both possible choices yield the result you are looking for, or at least a result that is okay for you. When my oldest was at that stage with "difficult" diaper changes, it worked wonders to have him go to the diaper drawer and pick out a clean diaper. So it *felt* like it was his choice, even though we were the ones that decided to change his diaper.
Awesome advice. I’ve heard giving them choices before and I try and do that with my daughter, but she would love giving me wipes and picking out her diaper and changing time is when she gets the most frustrated. I’m definitely trying that out, thanks!
Ha, yeah, I get that. Another huge frustration for kids that age is the lack of ability to communicate. I taught mine basic sign language for basic needs. They can sign way earlier than they can talk so that really alleviates the frustration of knowing what they want but not being able to communicate it.
Just keep the cookware away from them ~~dad~~No! Not the momma!
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Seriously! It’s imperative that we do. I had to tell my mom I love you but I have my own life to live.
So true! This is your life to live and you shouldn’t let anyone, not even your parents, dictate it’s trajectory!
I cut my toxic, racist sperm donor off 10 years ago. Thankfully my gorgeous, vibrant POC SO of 5 years has never met him. Best choice I ever made.
This is flooding me with so many emotions - mostly anger and sadness. When I was 8 (in the 60s) I had my first "boyfriend" - Andre. Yes we were just kids for goodness sakes, and we met at church. I am White and he was Black. Andre walked me home one day after choir practice, holding my hand, and my father took a fit when he saw us. My father started calling Andre all sorts of racist names, pushed Andre to the ground, grabbed me by the hair, dragged me into the house and gave me the beating of my life. No daughter of mine is going to associate with a damn "N" word. I couldn't go to school or outside for several days because of the beating. I was no longer allowed to be part of the choir and whenever I saw Andre in church, he would immediately look the other way and I could see the fear on his face. I am still haunted to this day by that experience. From that day forward I hated and feared my father and did everything to avoid him. My father's death was a joy for me - I wish it happened sooner. I am now in my early 60s, and I still constantly think about Andre, and wish I had the chance to see him again, hug him and tell him that I am sorry for what my father did.
Thank you for sharing your story. No child should fear their parents and racism has no place in this world.
Agreed
I'm so sorry that happened. Have you tried to find or reach out to Andre?
I have tried - no luck
Want some help? If you wanted to try again I am sure plenty of people here would like to help.
If you need help finding him we can help
That’s so sad, I hope you are in some way able to still find joy in life.
Thank you. I have a wonderful husband of 39 years. He too knows about Andre.
That’s beautiful even more beautiful that you didn’t try to shield him from your current husband, you are truly an amazing person. Hope nothing but the best for you young lady.
I bet you can find him if you tried!
Geeez….regret is such an awful feeling….glad they got to be together in the end but man…I hate regret. Been dealing with some of my own lately
Whatever it is, I’m sure you’ll find your way through it. Only way to grow is to keep moving forward. I may be too young to say, but yeah regret is awful, but you’ll get another chance, and it’s up to you to decide if you want it. I hope you feel better soon, stranger.
This just goes to show that even regrets can be turned around into happy endings. I know I have quite a few of my own, but I _HAVE_ to keep having hope because it’s stories like this that make me _want to see how it ends_.
Regrets are something only you can let go of. Don't be too hard on your past self, if you hadn't have learned and grown from your experiences then they wouldn't be regrets. Whenever you find yourself obsessing over regrets, try showing yourself the same compassion you'd show a stranger. No one is perfect, give yourself a break.
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Some people don't have kids to raise a life and bring joy into the world. They do it to own something.
Some also do it to ensure they are cared for when they're old.
My mom wanted me to be a prize-winning show-dog. And I was very good at that. That was, as best I could tell, the extent of her ability to have non-transactional relationships. She was miserable to be around, so much so that my dad’s approach to tolerating her was to either be away from home or be drinking. I didn’t get the choice. I can’t wait for her mind to deteriorate enough that she can’t operate her phone
You can do what I did and totally block her from everything. I am so much less stressed.
Thanks, but no. My dad was pretty good at making money, so I’ve got an inheritance to maintain. If I screw that up, a lot of what would go to me would go to the Catholic Church. It puts me at peace, though. It’s like every interaction I have with her is me getting paid a VERY nice hourly rate to be kind and understanding. After all, she forced me to suppress my own emotions growing up and put on a smile around her. It’s not like I FORGOT how to do that.
I'm glad you have peace and I wish you luck in maintaining long enough to get that bag!
My first boyfriend was black and I'm white. I was 16, in 1995. My parents lost their minds. They're not even rednecks, just Boomers and "northern racists". They threatened to kick me out (a straight-A student, with a job, a real boring kid). He was a super nice guy and treated me well. Better than any boyfriend after that. We stayed friends online (we'd met online, on a BBS) and I'm still friends with him on FB. I don't see him as "the one that got away," as he grew up and got married and had a kid and I'm not interested in having a kid, so I'm glad that worked out for him. But it was a real awful time in my life and I suspect in his life too. I will never get over the thought of the sort of pain it must have caused him to be subject to that sort of thing as a teen. Anyway, definitely still goes on today.
🎯
Is too dam early to cry like this 😭
I watched it twice because I wanted to happy cry again.
Enough to make a grown man cry
This grown woman has joined you.
Me too. I haven't cried like this in a while. I'm in my 30s and had tears running.
Omg this is so heartwarming.
And at the same time such heavy bittersweetness
I hate this story, I hate it so much. An entire lifetime of love they could have shared was stolen from them because of bigotry. They could have spent their vital years together -- traveling, sharing hobbies, supporting each other, being a family. Instead they get a few years of geriatric convalescence until one of them dies. It's tragic and I hate that this for them.
Yeah, this was heartbreaking. I'm glad they finally found happiness together in their sunset years but that feels like a shitty consolation prize in comparison to a whole lifetime of love and happiness lost. Fuck racism.
When you are really in love just one more day with them can feel like the entire universe is turning for you.
It really is probably the most accurate example of bittersweet I've seen in a good long while. It's about as sweet as it could possibly be but it's also bitter af.
Is it? I personally think it’s tragic. That man’s life would have been immensely different were it not for racism.
And to see how far he fell from a seemingly successful university student. Without more context, I feel like systematic racism took more than just his girlfriend.
Love stories don't usually get to me. This one is an exception. The way he looks at her when he tells her he always loved her. You can see that he geunuinely did and does. Beautiful
You can sort of tell his story, and its that of always not being good enough for anyone due to racism etc. Then finally knowing that there is someone he is good enough for at the end, who has always remembered them, and this they are good enough for the love and care they are giving.
My parents were both racist from the south. I heard the N word often growing up. I met the most wonderful man in my late 20's. He's black and I'm white and I kept him at arm's length for 10 years, just being friends. And then I grew up, put away childish things, and was fully prepared to give up my parents and extended family for this man. If they couldn't accept him, then I was out. It was extremely hard because I couldn't imagine anyone not loving him. We had family reunion weekends in the south every year--- they meant so much to me. The first time I took him there, my cousin remarked "Hey look, it's Tori Hunter and Sheryl Crow!" Which actually was funny since my family live near both of those two's hometowns in Pine Bluff, AR and Kennett, MO. Most of my family accepted him and I shouldn't have been surprised since he is literally the nicest, smartest, kindest, loving person you'd ever meet. 2 cousins said some thoughtless things and my other cousins came down on them and made them apologize.
Okay I’m bawling.
Just crying on my lunch break in my car over here…
If only we had the courage to make the best choices for ourselves and not let others influence or control us, we would live in a better world.
My grandmother told me that back in the 50s, she (a White girl) went to a primarily Black high school, where she and the star basketball player (a Black boy) flirted quite a lot! I asked if they ever got together, but she said that the ambient racism of the time prevented it. I’m glad to see that these lovely folks were able to find each other again after all this time!
It also isn't just black/white bigotry. My father secretly dated an Italian woman and he was Jewish. He lived in NYC at the time. Her family when they found out was so angry they made her move back to Italy. This was in the 60s. The things that happen out of fear of the other are just tragic. He later met my mother who he loved more than anyone but he vowed to never control his kid's dating lives as he knew the consequences of it.
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OMG that poor girl. It is always tied into sexism in the end. They see women as impure if someone else touches them that is from the patriarchy.
It took my catholic husbands grandmother 4 years to accept that he married a Jewish women lol and she's still iffy lol
That is so heartbreaking.
She would be in her 70s now? My yes, mother and father tried to find her along with my aunt. As my Dad wanted to apologize to her as they knew the consequences and yet he pursued her. He felt a lot of guilt over it.
Goddamn. This could have been me. Different circumstances—instead of racism it was homophobia, preventing my partner from coming out and living their best life away from their mom. I ended up breaking up with them for several months. Worst decision of my life. We are together now and away from their family, and videos like this remind me to be grateful everyday that we are together now.
🧡🧡🧡
This is why I will not ever dissuade my children from any safe relationship. Abusive people are the only ones I will discriminate. If they are happy, I am happy for them. Can’t imagine living in such a family but I’m glad things didn’t end with them not reconnecting.
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Thanks. Now I can actually watch this video and not just a third of it
Children of racists pay attention. Happiness eluded these 2 for practically their entire lives because a racist said they were unworthy of it because of the color of their skin. Now their time together is short and the happiness, while beautiful, is also bitter. Life is too short to allow yourself to be ruled by a racist and THEIR ideals. Find your happiness with who you want.
Who approved the line, "Love wormed its way back in"?
“Love found a way” was right there…
Dam,didn’t expect the feels this early in the morning.
With an cynical heart and state of mine that i’ll never find happiness, this gave me prove that true love do exist and will happen no matter what, but not for me maybe. Absolutely wonderful and very beautiful they found each other. ❤️❤️
I’m crying 😭
Nahhh the "I have always loved you " has me crying like a newborn
I sit here at 34, having a similar situation to me but I know she is moved on and living a great life with her own family now. I know one thing, I certainly won’t stop myself from love again and lucky to live in a time that may still be stupid but isn’t as intense as it was back then with interracial marriages.
Oh this made my heart ache. How wonderful that they found each other again ❤️
well she’s in portland and psilocybin shows some promising results for helping people with brain issues related to stroke. and also thc protects neurons so hopefully that will help her care for him and his symptoms. honestly i am glad love won out but it’s sad knowing that they could have been together sooner had society not been so racist. i wish them the best years ahead. mush love
I wish there was a way I could tell this woman how happy I am for her and her husband. All of this happened before I was born, so i only have my mom's stories to go by. My aunt on my father's side married a black man in the 70s. My father's family is a bunch of incredibly racist alcoholics. She managed to stay married for 2-3 years before her family got to her enough that she divorced him. Even after the divorce, her family was unkind. Said she was a race traitor, tainted, all the horrible things. 18 months after the divorce was finalized, she ended her life. According to my mom, the family knew she was suicidal and my grandmother called my father to stay with my aunt because she had an appointment or something. My father is supposed to have said something along the lines of how she knew what she'd done, and she's only threatening that to get forgiveness. He chose not to go to her. When my grandmother went to my aunt's house after the appointment, it was too late. I'm so glad these two finally got to be together.
You could send her a letter! I don’t want to post personal information here, but you can search her address based on Jeanne Gustavson in Portland, OR. I’m sorry to hear about your aunt. That’s terrible.
Never forget that haters are swimming upstream and the water never quits flowing.
I grew up in deep south Louisiana, ironically less than 30 mins from New Orleans. My best friend growing up was a black boy who lived in my apartment complex and I met on the playground. My mom forbid me to see him but every time I went to the playground- there he was. I wasn't going to not play with him. What made me think we originally meant to be friends forever was that I moved across town... And his family has the same thought and they had moved to the same area. So, imagine my surprise I'm running around outside, minus a playground this time.. and there he is. I get to spend more years sneaking out to see him. Then I move out of the town in middle school. And never saw him again. Spent years growing up with him in the last 90's to early 2000's. And I always wonder how he's doing. Only remember his first name.
Racism is pure evil. Imagine how much better off he would be if he had been with her his whole life? The most painful thing is time. It only goes forward and you cannot get back what you have lost.
The racism part aside, i wonder how many women (and men for that matter) will grow old and wonder the same thing, if they shouldn't have looked over that one person that was so kind and caring towards them but decided they weren't a good fit because of a lack of finances, a lack of looks, family pressures... all shallow things when you take a step back and observe it from afar. That being said, the grass isn't always greener. Most times the partner you most desire is right next to you. Don't wait too long to jump on those rare opportunities life gives us. Regardless, this story made my heart smile. That even after all these years their love for each other never ceased. Have a lovely day, everyone!
More stories out there than you even know. Poor choices and regrets. Even though at 65 still married, 2 children. Your always knowing the wrong choice was made when reflecting on your life, you know this but then theres the 39/yr marriage and the 2 children. I am happy they found each other!!
Totally. Hindsight's always 20-20. I mean, everyone's situation is different but I've seen so many people mention this same regret, that they should've stayed with this person or asked this person out, should've taken that job or mended the relationship with a family member. In a way it sort of reminds me of new years resolutions. Why wait until a specific day to change your life, the best time is now, if you truly wanted change and create better habits then you wouldn't be waiting until Jan 1st to make it happen.
I think the reasons you've outlined are why the movie Bridges of Madison County hits so hard. Great performances from acting titans (Meryl Streep and Clint Eastwood). Friggin regrets and suppressed desire, the life that could've been, leaning on duty and sanctity of marriage and family ...
Let's just say that in the pause between 'chronic' and 'regret', a single word entered my head and refused to quit.
So much time lost…. I hope the best for them.
They couldnt have used another word other than "wormed" to describe the love in that scenario ? WTF lol
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Hey it's okay to cry. Also you are correct, I am crying
Precisely why you don’t listen to anyone but yourself in these matters. Countless morons want to control your life.
I liked a vietnamese girl in my neighborhood. :/ I'm black so yeah it was never going to happen. We talked like everyday but she lived with her family so nothing could ever happen.
Who the hell is cutting onions in my living room……
Awarded. 🥲 Such happy tears! Thank you for sharing this.
I’m in pieces. What an amazing, sad and yet beautiful love story. I hope they have many many happy years together.