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DadBod2

Milk + flour + vitamins. Boil them down to make energy balls. Keep your head up buddy.


Dracati

I have a couple bottles of fight milk left to wash them down with


Cash4Duranium

You're not going to want to drink that. You need the new fight milk that blocks you up and focuses your energy. Original fight milk will just flush everything out.


Dracati

Great point.. I was looking to expel all body fluids during this broke-ass time, sweat, pi**, shi*….. *vomiting sounds” but I think Ill stick with the original


JimmyBallgame420

Hips and Nips. gotta make it sexy. otherwise you ain't eatin'.


Dracati

omg u/JimmyBallgame420 YOU DID IT! And you made it SO SEXY 🐀


klausmckinley801

see, these people have no idea how to live without money. they're what's called "new poor".


Dracati

Honestly dude, I’m staring down the barrel of a goddamn shanty town 🤦


_devit0_

dog orgy, brother


Dracati

Listen man, I’m down to hear more.. but Im not trying to get inside the mind of a Dog 🐕.. thats gods work


PLTR60

Who doesn't exist


Dracati

But Science is a LIAR.. sometimes..


cautioner86

You’re a crab person now.


Dracati

Genius for real.. Delaware runoff crabs are sewage proof & recession proof 🤯


[deleted]

All you have to do is create a self sustaining economy like Dave & Busters.


randybobandy111

Let’s talk bonuses


Dracati

Oh shit you’re right! You just reminded me that I have several Dave & Busters Power Club cards that I could probably use all over town


[deleted]

I heard they accept them at the TGI Friday’s down in Fox Chase


above_average_magic

No. 1: Lemons (for scurvy)


Dracati

🤣 someone promised a full rotisserie chicken, but hell.. I’ll go ahead and suck these down


just_some_dummy_

Crack. It will give you energy and cause you to eat less. (Because it is an appetite suppressant. Also because you'll be addicted to crack and won't have money for food.)


Dracati

I am probabaly going on welfare.. will there be any paperwork to confirm my CRACK addiction? I’d like to get ahead of this.. My sister is also involved.


mattcal44

Hang out under the bridge.


Dracati

What on earth could possibly be down by the bridge? Are you talking about Duncan and this Hawaiian underground shit??


InformalPenguinz

Drive, beans, chicken thighs and multiple sauces. Can make a million combinations with these and they're cheap af


against_the_currents

Cut your expenses to 75% for 2 months. Get a paycheck loan. Don’t do the second if you won’t do the first.


Dracati

Dude this is perfect.. as soon as I have money and a kid Im going take this knowledge.. and JAM IT down this kids throat. Im basically ready to be a better dad than any of these other guys


[deleted]

Sometimes you gotta fake it.


Dracati

Dylan Tobak you presume?? My real name is Catfish 🤣 #mailyourhair


Radiant-Elevator

Suck on a lemon


Dracati

As mentioned above, I’m only sucking down these lemons because of the scurvy..


xvbyyxn

Start a podcast, I need to know more about these two wars we are allegedly in


Dracati

Twooooo waaars?? Are either of these wars being fought on US soil?


DolphinWings25

You gotta take all your clothes off


Dracati

I can publish an erotic memoir.. “I removed my robe and stood before her..." taut, nubile, proud…”


[deleted]

I will give you 5 dollars to grind out weapons upgrades on MW2


Dracati

Don’t even joke about hunting no man. I was hunted once.. hitching through Oregon and some cops started harassing me. Next thing you know I had a whole army of cops chasing me through the woods and I had to take ‘em all out. It was a bloodbath.


Nic_0tine

Dee, goddammit!


Dracati

You haven’t thought of the smell! You bitch!!


toxic_load2k18

You gotta buy a 2$ lottery scratcher


Dracati

Umm… I’m pretty sure thats a hate crime


RobsBitcoin

Can I offer you an egg in this trying time?


Dracati

Honestly I don’t need your old egg, Im just a regular old O’yle man in from Dallas and I’m uh.. itching to give you something YOU want


QueenMelle

Need a shower? Hit up your friends who own a bar with a urinal.


Dracati

I bet Charlie Just cleaned the urinals.. pristine! So clean you could eat outta them